The Resilience Project

Julie Brumley
  • 5.0 (3)
  • MENTAL HEALTH

Illuminating the unseen impacts of adoption — for all who’ve been touched by it. The Resilience Project Podcast brings voice, visibility, and validation to the parts of adoption society rarely names - but all of us feel. Through a trauma-informed somatic lens, host Julie Brumley explores the lived experiences of the entire adoption constellation, with a tender emphasis on the adoptee experience.This podcast goes beyond storytelling into soul-telling. It offers embodied insight, compassionate education, and a path toward awareness, strength, and hope. Each episode invites listeners to understand adoption more deeply - not just with the mind, but with the nervous system - and to reconnect with the truth, identity, and belonging that were always yours to come home to.

  1. 6D AGO

    How to Change the Meaning You Attach to Things (And Break Old Patterns)

    Summary In this embodied, real-time conversation, Julie Brumley walks listeners through a powerful shift: the meaning we attach to our experiences shapes our stories, emotions, and the way we move through the world. Most of us think we’re reacting to what’s happening now… but often, we’re responding to what we expect to happen based on the past. Through personal examples and guided reflection, Julie shows how old meanings - like “I’m too much” or “something is wrong with me” - keep us stuck in familiar patterns. This episode introduces a simple, body-based practice to pause, question those meanings, and choose something new. Not by forcing positivity, but by creating space for a different experience. This is the bridge between releasing the past and creating what’s possible. Keywords adoption, adoptee healing, somatic work, nervous system, trauma, identity, self-worth, meaning, emotional patterns, embodiment, relationships, belonging Key Topics How meaning shapes emotion, behavior, and expectationWhy we react from past associations, not present realityPersonal examples: breakdown, rejection, and conflictShifting from “something is wrong with me” to new meaningThe nervous system’s role in familiar patternsA 4-step practice to change meaning in real timeAnchoring new beliefs through the bodyTakeaways You’re not reacting to now - you’re responding to past meaningOld meaning → old story → old emotions → repeated patternsWhat you associate becomes what you anticipateYou don’t get what you want - you get what you’re practiced in receivingYou can pause and choose a new meaningYour body must experience the shift, not just think itThis is the bridge between release and creationChapters 00:00 – A conversation, not a lecture 01:00 – The bridge: releasing → creating 02:00 – Why meaning matters 03:30 – Associations + anticipation (Kelly Brock teaching) 05:30 – Real-life example: feeling excluded 07:40 – Old meaning: “something is wrong with me” 09:30 – Reframing breakdown → breakthrough 10:30 – Relationship + conflict examples 12:00 – The 4-step practice 14:00 – Anchoring new meaning in the body 16:30 – Somatic integration practice 18:30 – Releasing old story, receiving new meaning 20:20 – Choosing again in real time 22:00 – Closing reflection + invitation Closing Note If something stirred in you while listening… that’s not random. It’s awareness. Pause. Ask what you’re making it mean. And gently… choose again. Links Un-M-Othered: A Revolution in Adoptee Healing retreat Pdf of my notes for reference Website Instagram: @juliebrumley_ Facebook: julierasbrum TikTok: @juliebrumley_ Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group You Tube: @julie_brumley

    24 min

  2. APR 23

    Why Love Doesn’t Feel Safe for Adoptees (And How to Change It)

    Summary In this personal, embodied episode, Julie Brumley shares a realization that emerged through guided journaling and somatic reflection: For many adoptees, love didn’t feel safe, it felt something to earn. Through reflective questions and body-based practices, Julie explores how early experiences shape our relationship to love, safety, and connection. She shows how adaptations like people-pleasing, control, and hyper-awareness aren’t flaws, but intelligent responses the body learned to stay safe. This episode invites you out of performance and into presence. Not by fixing yourself, but by reconnecting with the parts of you that learned to survive, and offering them something new. Keywords adoption, adoptee healing, somatic healing, trauma, nervous system, attachment, self-worth, people-pleasing, identity, belonging, embodiment, emotional safety Key Topics Learning to be loved through survival instead of safetyWhy love may not feel safe in the body for adopteesEarly experiences shaping attachment and identityPeople-pleasing, control, and hyper-awareness as protectionEmbodied journaling and somatic awarenessReframing “what’s wrong with me” to “what did my body learn?”Moving from performance-based worth to internal belongingBuilding safety in relationship with selfKey Takeaways You didn’t learn love in dysfunction-you learned it in adaptation.If love doesn’t feel safe, your body will try to control or earn it.People-pleasing and perfectionism are protective responses.You don’t need to reject the parts that got you here.“What got you here is not what will get you there.”Healing begins by thanking protective parts, not fixing them.You don’t have to perform to be loved.Belonging starts within.⏱ Chapters 00:00 – A more personal, embodied episode 01:00 – “I struggled with love… because it didn’t feel safe” 02:00 – Learning to be loved in survival mode 03:10 – “How did you learn to be loved?” 04:20 – Control and adaptation as safety 05:00 – Guided somatic reflection 06:10 – “That makes sense” 06:30 – Performance-based love 07:30 – Feeling evaluated 08:00 – “What got me here…” 09:00 – Thanking protective parts 10:00 – Releasing survival 10:45 – Experiencing safety 12:00 – Embodying safety 12:35 – “What if I didn’t have to perform?” 13:30 – Presence over performance 14:00 – What we’re really seeking 14:40 – Nothing is wrong with you 15:20 – Healing through self-relationship 16:00 – Invitation to deeper work 17:00 – Closing reflections Links Un-M-Othered: A Revolution in Adoptee Healing retreat Intimacy and Adoption: Why Love Feels Complicated Website Instagram: @juliebrumley_ Facebook: julierasbrum TikTok: @juliebrumley_ Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group You Tube: @julie_brumley

    18 min

  3. APR 16

    The Day Everything Changed (And Why I Created Revelation LIVE)

    ✨ Summary In this episode, Julie Brumley shares the defining moment that redirected her work from addiction into adoptee healing - and the deeper understanding of belonging that followed. She introduces Revelation LIVE, a 7-day guided experience designed to help adoptees make sense of their patterns, reconnect with themselves, and begin experiencing belonging from within. ✨ Keywords adoptee healing, belonging, identity, attachment, self-discovery, nervous system, trauma-informed coaching, emotional integration ✨ Key Topics The moment that initiated Julie’s transition into adoptee-focused workHow early separation shapes identity, attachment, and belongingThe difference between intellectual understanding and embodied healingAn overview of Revelation and its 7-day frameworkWhy connection to self - not performance - creates lasting change✨ Takeaways What feels like “who you are” may actually be adaptationBelonging isn’t something you find - it’s something you reconnect toInsight alone doesn’t shift patterns - felt-sense experience doesThe body holds what the mind can’t always explainHealing deepens in spaces where you don’t have to perform✨ Chapters 00:00 The Moment Everything Changed 04:30 When the Direction Became Clear 07:15 Why Belonging Feels Complicated 10:20 Understanding vs Experiencing Change 12:50 Introducing Revelation LIVE ✨ Resources Revelation LIVE – 7 Day Challenge Guide Not Guru with Kelly Brock Un-M-Othered: A Revolution in Adoptee Healing retreat info Website Instagram: @juliebrumley_ Facebook: julierasbrum TikTok: @juliebrumley_ Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group You Tube: @julie_brumley

    17 min

  4. APR 9

    Uncovering Roots: A Bulgarian Adoptee's Search for Community

    Summary In this heartfelt interview, Nicole Quirino shares her complex journey as an international adoptee from Bulgaria, exploring themes of belonging, identity, and the search for her biological family. This conversation sheds light on the nuanced experiences of adoptees navigating systemic barriers, cultural identity, and emotional resilience. Keywords adoption, international adoptee, Bulgaria, identity, belonging, DNA testing, search for family, systemic barriers, mental health, community Key Topics The impact of maternal separation at a young age Challenges in adoptee community spaces The role of DNA testing in identity discovery Systemic barriers in international adoption Emotional resilience and self-care in search journeys Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Complexities of Adoption 04:18 Nicole's Journey as an International Adoptee 06:47 Navigating Identity and Belonging 09:05 The Impact of Maternal Separation 11:19 Struggles in Adoptee Spaces 13:43 Exploring White Passing Identity 16:05 Desire for Deeper Connections 17:55 Challenges in International Adoption 20:13 The Search for Biological Family 22:35 Understanding International Adoption Dynamics 24:43 The Reality of Search Processes 26:52 Conclusion and Future Aspirations 31:11 Searching for Biological Family 32:44 Navigating Legal and Bureaucratic Challenges 37:05 The Emotional Toll of the Search 38:07 Understanding Cultural and Linguistic Barriers 42:00 Personal Growth Through the Search 43:24 Connecting with Potential Family 47:03 The Complexity of New Relationships 48:39 Finding Confidence and Self-Care 50:17 Advice for Fellow Adoptees 52:34 Reflections on the Journey Resources Un-M-Othered: A Revolution in Adoptee Healing Retreat Bulgarian Family Code Amendment 2023 Facebook Bulgaria Adoption Group Nicole's Links Instagram Facebook Website Instagram: @juliebrumley_ Facebook: julierasbrum TikTok: @juliebrumley_ Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group You Tube: @julie_brumley

    56 min

  5. APR 2

    Understanding Your Nervous System: A Guide for Adoptees and Those Who Love Them

    Summary This episode explores the polyvagal theory, trauma responses, and how understanding our nervous system can aid in healing from primal trauma, especially for adoptees. It offers practical grounding tools and insights into self-regulation. Keywords Polyvagal Theory, Trauma Responses, Adoptee Healing, Nervous System, Self-Regulation, Primal Trauma, Somatic Therapy, Self-Compassion, Grounding Techniques Chapters 00:00 - Understanding the Severance Cycle and Trauma 04:26 - Exploring Polyvagal Theory and Nervous System Responses 07:14 - Defining Primal Trauma and Its Impact 09:58 - The Polyvagal Ladder: Navigating Autonomic States 12:33 - Understanding Trauma Responses and Self-Regulation 15:03 - Practical Tools for Managing Trauma Responses 18:01 - The Importance of Self-Compassion and Community 20:45 - Building Awareness and Connection with the Body 21:28 - Grounding Tools for Different States 24:21 - Consistency in Self-Regulation Practices 25:21 - Changing Your Relationship with Yourself 26:18 - Restoration and Reconnection for Adoptees 27:20 - Final Thoughts and Community Resources Resources Grounding Resources My Clients Use Slides I Used Today Stephen Porges - Polyvagal Theory Peter Levine - Somatic Experiencing Kristin Neff - Self-Compassion Research Un-M-Othered: A Revolution in Adoptee Healing retreat info Website Instagram: @juliebrumley_ Facebook: julierasbrum TikTok: @juliebrumley_ Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group You Tube: @julie_brumley

    28 min

  6. MAR 26

    Breaking Cycles: A Deep Dive into Adoption and Identity with Sydney Curtin

    Join Julie Brumley in an in-depth conversation with Sydney Curtin about her complex adoption journey, healing from past wounds, and breaking intergenerational cycles. This episode offers profound insights into identity, forgiveness, and the power of owning your story. keywords adoption, healing, identity, forgiveness, intergenerational trauma, mental health, personal growth, adoption journey, mental health awareness, mental health advocacy key topics Adoption from multiple perspectives including birth and adoptive experiences Healing from trauma and loss, including suicide and abuse Breaking intergenerational cycles and personal growth Chapters 00:00 Introduction to Complex Adoption Experiences 03:28 Sydney's Journey Through Adoption 07:32 Healing from Unacknowledged Loss 10:20 The Weight of Unforgiven Relationships 13:10 Understanding Identity Through Adoption 14:59 The Impact of Loss on Identity 18:33 Misconceptions About Adoption 22:16 Breaking Cycles of Trauma 29:15 Navigating Grief and Identity in Adoption 32:29 The Power of Coaching vs. Traditional Therapy 35:27 Finding Hope Amidst Grief 38:43 Confronting the Darkness of Mental Health 41:47 Reclaiming Your Voice and Identity 45:58 Writing for Healing: Courageous Considerations 48:58 Understanding Adoption: A Moral Perspective 51:06 Healing Without Labels 53:31 Words of Encouragement for the Journey Links Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink Sydney Curtin's Website Courageous Considerations Book Sydney's Instagram Website Instagram: @juliebrumley_ Facebook: julierasbrum TikTok: @juliebrumley_ Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group You Tube: @julie_brumley

    57 min

  7. MAR 19

    Nothing Is Wrong With You: The Severance Cycle in Adoptee Healing

    In this episode, Julie Brumley shares a framework foundational to her work with adoptees: Not because something is wrong with you… but because your body learned a different cycle. Drawing from the Satisfaction Cycle (Bonnie Bainbridge Cohen), she explains how attachment unfolds through attunement and safety. But for adoptees, that cycle is often interrupted. From that disruption, Julie introduces the Severance Cycle, a pattern she developed to describe what happens when connection is broken before we have words. This isn’t just theory. It’s the lived experience of so many adoptees. And when you understand it… everything starts to make sense. ⏱ Timestamps: 00:00 - Introduction: How early body memories affect trauma and healing 00:27 - Adoptees’ patterns of receiving and adaptation 00:53 - The body's response from conception: body memory starts in the womb 01:51 - How trauma affects brain and body development in utero 02:46 - Development of the heart and brain during early pregnancy 03:16 - Sensations versus stories: What early body imprints mean for adoptees 04:01 - The significance of the early attachment and stress responses 06:06 - The satisfaction cycle: how healthy attachment is supposed to work 07:02 - The baby's natural rhythm: push, reach, take, and settle 08:30 - The importance of attunement for the satisfaction cycle to succeed 09:27 - Recognizing whether this cycle was experienced in your own body 10:48 - The severance cycle: rupture, recoil, reluctance, rejection, resistance 11:09 - Description of each phase and its emotional impact 12:28 - How the severance cycle disrupts choice, connection, and context 14:16 - What is lost in severance: early choice and connection, and understanding of the world 15:38 - The impact of rupture on the primal wound and lifelong grief 17:34 - The polyvagal theory and its relation to survival responses 18:42 - The body’s tendency to choose familiar danger over safety 19:13 - How healing begins: creating safety and relearning trust with the body 20:34 - Rebuilding connection through self-regulation and safe relationships 21:34 - The power of context: reinterpreting past pain in the present 22:42 - Recognizing patterned behaviors: nothing is wrong with you, your body learned a cycle 23:12 - The work of restoring the original rhythm: safety, reach, receive, rest 24:02 - Invitation to upcoming retreat for experiential healing 25:25 - Encouragement to notice bodily responses and cultivate curiosity over fixing 26:21 - Resources, community, and hope for adoptees on the healing journey 🌿 Resources & Links: SlidesUnmothered: A Revolution in Adoptee Healing Retreat (May)Polyvagal TheorySchedule a call with JulieWebsite Instagram: @juliebrumley_ Facebook: julierasbrum TikTok: @juliebrumley_ Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group You Tube: @julie_brumley

    27 min

  8. MAR 12

    Behind the Curtain of the “I Am a Burden” Belief: What We Explored in the Gathering

    Summary Julie Brumley shares her personal journey of healing from adoption-related trauma, emphasizing the importance of body-based work and inner belonging. This episode explores limiting beliefs, the role of somatic therapy, and practical steps for adoptees to reconnect with their true selves. Keywords adoption trauma, healing, somatic therapy, belonging, limiting beliefs, inner work, resilience, identity, trauma-informed care Key  Topics Trauma and adoption Body-based healing and somatic work Limiting beliefs and inner narratives Chapters 00:00 Introduction and Personal Context 02:39 Common Experiences of Adoption-Related Abandonment 03:29 The Impact of Early Rejection and Developmental Trauma 04:43 Realizing the Need for a Relationship with Self 05:47 The Moment of Confronting Adoption Skeletons 08:01 Reading the Adoption Records and Fragmentation 09:40 The Art of Kintsugi: Rebuilding with Gold 10:13 The Importance of Working with the Body 10:49 Challenges with Traditional Somatic Therapy 12:07 The Power of Humility and Self-Discovery 13:01 Learning to Live from a Place of Belonging 14:25 Limiting Beliefs That Keep Us Stuck 15:45 Addressing Adoption in Therapy and Spirituality 17:04 Identity Lives in the Body, Not Just the Mind 18:52 Overcoming the Belief of Being Too Much or Not Enough 20:28 Belonging as a Survival Strategy 21:51 Imagining a Safe and Loved Self 23:40 Uncovering Inner Strength and Capacity 26:36 The Belonging Blueprint: A Healing Framework 28:06 The Journey from Survival to Authentic Living 29:23 Invitation to Deeper Healing and Support Links Unmothered Retreat May 23-24th, 2026 Schedule a call to connect with Julie Website Instagram: @juliebrumley_ Facebook: julierasbrum TikTok: @juliebrumley_ Click to Join My Free Adoptee Facebook Group You Tube: @julie_brumley

    30 min
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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
3 Ratings

About

Illuminating the unseen impacts of adoption — for all who’ve been touched by it. The Resilience Project Podcast brings voice, visibility, and validation to the parts of adoption society rarely names - but all of us feel. Through a trauma-informed somatic lens, host Julie Brumley explores the lived experiences of the entire adoption constellation, with a tender emphasis on the adoptee experience.This podcast goes beyond storytelling into soul-telling. It offers embodied insight, compassionate education, and a path toward awareness, strength, and hope. Each episode invites listeners to understand adoption more deeply - not just with the mind, but with the nervous system - and to reconnect with the truth, identity, and belonging that were always yours to come home to.

Information

  • Creator
    Julie Brumley
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    28
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 The Resilience Project
  • Show Website
    The Resilience Project

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