Trauma Talks : With Russ Tellup

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Hi, I’m Russ Tellup, a Trauma-Informed Somatic Coach and Level 1 Brainspotting practitioner. In my podcast "Trauma Talks," I dive into the neuroscience of trauma, exploring somatic healing practices, Polyvagal Theory, and IFS (Internal Family Systems) parts work. I also occasionally address the complexities of narcissistic abuse, offering insights and tools for healing. Join me each week as we navigate the journey of recovery, resilience, and self-discovery together.

  1. NOV 10

    What If Death Is A Rebirth Into Purpose

    What if grief isn’t a staircase but a spiral that returns to teach us, soften us, and connect us to something larger than loss? That’s the journey Dave Roberts takes us on—former addictions counselor, longtime professor, and host of Teaching Journeys—after losing his 18-year-old daughter, Janine, to a rare cancer. We move from the clinical realities of unresolved grief and relapse to an honest, deeply human exploration of meaning, near-death experiences, and the possibility that love continues beyond the body. Dave shares how his early reliance on stage models gave way to a more accurate view: grief loops and resurfaces, especially through anniversaries, music, and memory. He describes a transformative encounter that shifted him from strict materialism to an open, critical curiosity about consciousness, the afterlife, and continued bonds. We dig into near-death experience research, veridical perceptions, and the tension between healthy skepticism and genuine mystery. Along the way, Dave shows how intention, service, and community can ease suffering while honoring the truth of the pain. We also talk generational trauma—abandonment, seizures, and the shape of inherited patterns—and what it means to forgive with context, not amnesia. Dave reframes his parents’ choices through ancestral insight, revealing how understanding reduces shame and frees the nervous system. For anyone facing raw loss, he offers grounded steps: show yourself grace, survive before you try to thrive, don’t judge a life by its last act after suicide, and build support with people who have capacity, not just proximity. If you’re looking for resources, Dave’s book with Patty Farino, When the Psychology Professor Met the Minister, and his Teaching Journeys podcast offer more tools, stories, and hope. If this conversation helped you breathe a little easier or think a little wider, subscribe, share it with a friend who needs it, and leave a review so others can find their way here too. Your voice helps this community grow.

    1h 8m

  2. NOV 4

    How A Veteran Turned Grief Into A Lifeline For 600+ Children

    What does it take to help a child rewrite their story after losing a parent who served? We sit down with Joe Lewis, a multi-branch veteran and founder of Angels of America’s Fallen, to unpack a simple, powerful model: pair each child with a coach or instructor in a passion they choose—sports, music, arts, cooking—and stay with them until age 19. No red tape. No one-size-fits-all plans. Just steady mentorship, local providers, and consistent check-ins that turn grief’s chaos into structure, belonging, and growth. Russ brings a trauma-informed lens to why this works. After a death, families lose the very co-regulation that keeps emotions manageable; everyone is grieving at once. A caring mentor becomes a nervous-system anchor. Chris Mamone adds the acceptance piece, showing how the “gift in crappy wrapping paper” reveals itself when kids feel seen, heard, and supported. Together, we explore post-traumatic growth without sugarcoating pain, naming the realities of PTSD, stigma, and the eligibility gaps that leave many families without formal benefits—especially after suicide or illnesses tied to service but not documented. Joe shares the origin of “Lessons from Lila,” a swim-safety initiative created after a waitlisted toddler drowned. It’s a sober reminder that the waitlist—now 800+ children—represents urgency, not numbers. We walk through wins large and small: a teen who went from ICU-level anorexia to cooking professionally and dreaming of dietetics; a young athlete nurtured from pee-wee football to national recognition; and kids who light up a room at the Angel Gala as their passions take center stage. Along the way, we talk joyful fundraisers like “Skate for Chicken,” new city chapters that raise local awareness, and the power of recurring donations to move children off the list faster. If you care about mental health, veteran families, first responders, and practical ways to prevent downstream harm, this conversation delivers both heart and blueprint. Join us: donate or start a monthly pledge at aoafallen.org, share this episode with someone who needs hope, and leave a review to help more listeners find these stories.

    55 min

  3. OCT 14

    Juggling Your Way Out of Trauma

    When grief and trauma threaten to pull you under, what if the most effective medicine wasn't sitting still, but moving with purpose? Kevin Howely discovered this truth firsthand after losing his sister, father, and mother in rapid succession between 2017 and 2020. Drawing on his unique background as both a professional clown and neuromuscular massage therapist, Kevin developed "Toss Catch Heal" – a therapeutic juggling method that transforms simple rhythmic movement into profound nervous system regulation. The science behind this approach is fascinating. Juggling creates bilateral stimulation (similar to EMDR therapy), activates both brain hemispheres, and releases neurochemicals that counteract depression and anxiety. For those stuck in trauma responses, the practice demands presence – you simply can't juggle while lost in rumination about the past or anxiety about the future. This forced presence, combined with gentle movement, creates what Kevin calls "medicine in motion." What makes this approach particularly valuable is its accessibility, especially for those who struggle with traditional talk therapy. "For men especially, this can be your starting place," Kevin explains. "I know how hard it can be to sit down and talk, but what if healing came through motion? What if taking action was the first therapy that finally worked for you?" Perhaps most surprising is how the therapeutic benefit extends beyond the successful catches to include the inevitable drops. Learning to drop objects without self-judgment becomes a powerful metaphor for releasing perfectionism and developing resilience. Starting with colorful scarves that slow movement and reduce fear, practitioners gradually build confidence while simultaneously calming their nervous systems. Whether you're working through grief, anxiety, depression, or simply feeling disconnected from your body, this innovative approach offers a playful yet powerful path toward healing. Visit Kevin's website or connect with him on Instagram to discover how something as simple as tossing and catching might become your unexpected pathway back to wholeness.

    42 min

  4. OCT 14

    What happens when a child learns that tears invite pain—and how a man unlearns it

    What if your first lesson about emotion was that tears invite pain? That’s the blueprint Russ carried from infancy through a childhood on Ohio streets where “Russ doesn’t cry” became a badge and a prison. We follow that thread from early punishment for need, to a teenage funeral where sixteen years of feeling finally broke loose, to the quiet skills that make emotion safe again without pretending to be stone. We get honest about the difference between managing feelings and suppressing them. The culture often praises stoicism, but the body keeps the score: fatigue, freeze, inflammation, and panic when the pressure valve never opens. I share how that old rule shaped my marriages and parenting, why “be invisible” felt like survival, and how a coach’s simple question—“Why are you trying to stop?”—reframed crying as courage instead of failure. Along the way, we dig into nervous system basics: how long exhales, grounding, and vocal vibration cue the ventral vagal system, bringing the prefrontal cortex back online so perspective, empathy, and choice can return. You’ll leave with a clear, repeatable practice: feet on the floor, chair supporting your weight, a 5-2-10 breath pattern, gentle chest tapping, and a low hum that resonates through bone and calms the body. It’s not about being dramatic; it’s about letting the energy complete its cycle so it doesn’t calcify into symptoms. If you’ve ever believed strength means silence, this conversation offers a different path—one where feeling is a skill, presence is power, and tears can be the start of healing rather than the sign of weakness. If this resonates, subscribe, share it with someone who needs it, and leave a review telling us what shifted for you.

    17 min

  5. MAY 7

    Not Good Enough: Healing Core Beliefs and Anxiety

    What if the inner voice telling you "I'm not good enough" isn't just an occasional thought, but a core belief driving everything you do? Sabrina Troback, registered counselor and author of "Not Good Enough," reveals how these deeply-held beliefs form through generations of family patterns and personal experiences—sometimes even before birth. After two decades teaching children with learning disabilities, Sabrina discovered her true calling helping clients understand and challenge their core beliefs. Her approach dives beneath surface behaviors to address the fundamental feeling of unworthiness that fuels anxiety, self-doubt, and disconnection. As she explains, "That core belief is kind of that inner voice that drives everything that we do... for a lot of people who have had trauma throughout their life, often that core belief is feeling not good enough, not important, not valued." The conversation illuminates how trauma passes through families in surprising ways. Even well-intentioned parents who avoid harmful behaviors like addiction can transmit the same "not good enough" message through impatience, anger, or emotional unavailability. This generational transmission explains why similar feelings of unworthiness persist despite outwardly different family environments. Sabrina offers practical wisdom for those struggling with anxiety, explaining that most people only recognize anxiety symptoms when they're already overwhelming. Her book provides tools to identify subtle early signs—sweaty palms, jaw clenching, shoulder tension—and address anxiety before it escalates. She also shares transformative strategies like making specific plans for anxiety-triggering situations, which builds confidence in your ability to handle challenges. Whether you're wrestling with past trauma or simply feeling perpetually inadequate, this episode provides compassionate insight into how these patterns form and practical steps toward healing. As Sabrina reminds us, "Evolution, not revolution." Small, sustainable changes create lasting transformation in how we view ourselves and engage with the world.

    39 min

  6. APR 14

    Body Wisdom: Finding Your Voice After Losing Everything

    Michelle Hollingbrooks' extraordinary story begins with a mosquito bite that changed everything. At thirteen, this seemingly insignificant event transmitted equine encephalitis, causing her brain to swell and plunging her into a seven-day coma. The aftermath was devastating – she awoke blind, deaf, partially paralyzed, and with no memory whatsoever. Unlike a newborn baby with established connections from the womb, Michelle describes awakening as a "blank slate" with no understanding of who she was or even what it meant to be human. This profound disconnection forced Michelle to develop extraordinary body awareness. Unable to communicate verbally and with no memory to draw upon, she became hyper-attuned to energy and somatic cues, learning to read others' bodies as a survival mechanism. These skills now form the foundation of her work as a trauma-informed somatic coach, where she helps others reconnect with their own body wisdom. The most remarkable aspect of Michelle's journey? The very creature associated with her illness – the horse – became central to her healing. After establishing her nonprofit Unbridled Change, Michelle discovered how horses provide unparalleled opportunities for trauma recovery. She shares a powerful story of a traumatized teen whose breakthrough came when a therapy horse named Barry chose to move toward her during an emotional outburst rather than flee, creating a safe container for authentic emotional processing that no office-bound therapist could replicate. Michelle's approach blends somatic awareness with spiritual dimensions, recognizing that true healing requires addressing body, mind, and soul as an integrated whole. She views healing not as "fixing" something broken but as "remembering we're already whole" – a profound perspective gained through her own journey back to embodiment. Today, she offers coaching both in-person and virtually, hosts the Soulful Practices podcast, and has authored "The Horse Cure" with a second book on somatic healing coming in 2025. Ready to reconnect with your own body wisdom? Explore Michelle's work at unbridledchange.org and discover how somatic awareness can transform your relationship with trauma, helping you find the medicine within your own wounds.

    57 min

  7. FEB 19

    The Art of Self-Acceptance Through Hypnotic Healing

    The episode centers around the theme of self-love and acceptance through the practice of hypnotherapy. With a focus on letting go of negative beliefs and cultivating a positive sense of self-worth, listeners are guided through a relaxing hypnotherapy session that aims to nurture inner kindness and acceptance. • Introduction to the importance of hypnotherapy for self-worth • Guided hypnotherapy session focusing on relaxation techniques • Visualization of inner sanctuary for self-acceptance • Release of negative beliefs through metaphorical imagery • Affirmations reinforcing inherent worth and deep self-love • Returning to awareness with a renewed sense of empowerment and love

    30 min

  8. 12/30/2024

    When the past holds you back:A guide to emotional liberation

    What if the very things meant to protect us are holding us back? Join me, Russ Tellup, as we unravel the complexities of trauma and its grip on our lives. Through an enlightening discussion, I shed light on how our bodies cling to past experiences, shaping behaviors and patterns that can stifle our growth. Discover healing paths like brain spotting and somatic work, which can unlock buried emotions and lead us towards a more fulfilling life. My personal journey of overcoming trauma serves as a beacon of hope, offering reassurance that healing is within reach, and you are never alone in this endeavor. I also invite you to become a vital part of this journey by sharing your thoughts on the episode's format. Whether you enjoy direct discussions or prefer insights from interviews with coaches and therapists, your feedback is invaluable in shaping future content. Explore one-on-one opportunities with me at Brainspotting Colorado Springs and connect through social media for further support. As we step into a new year, I look forward to continuing this conversation, fostering a space for healing and growth, and building a supportive community together.

    12 min
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About

Hi, I’m Russ Tellup, a Trauma-Informed Somatic Coach and Level 1 Brainspotting practitioner. In my podcast "Trauma Talks," I dive into the neuroscience of trauma, exploring somatic healing practices, Polyvagal Theory, and IFS (Internal Family Systems) parts work. I also occasionally address the complexities of narcissistic abuse, offering insights and tools for healing. Join me each week as we navigate the journey of recovery, resilience, and self-discovery together.

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