In this first episode of The Family Scapegoat Chronicles, Elle Boone opens the door to a new kind of healing conversation; one built on honesty, humor, and permission to go slow. She shares what inspired the show, what “slow healing” actually means, and why naming your experience as the family scapegoat is often the first step toward freedom. Whether you’re still untangling family patterns or just learning the word scapegoating for the first time, this episode offers warmth, clarity, and a gentle start to your healing journey. 💬 What You’ll Hear What it actually means to be “the family scapegoat” How shame and silence keep the role alive Why slow, steady healing works better than rushing recovery How Elle’s story shaped the heart of this podcast 💡 Quote “You’re not behind—you’re healing on time.” 🤝 Perfect For Anyone beginning to question their family dynamics or realizing they were cast in a role that never fit. 🔗 Connect 🌐 thefamilyscapegoatchronicles.com 📩 familyscapegoating@gmail.com ☕ Support the show ⚠️ Content Notice: Discussions include abuse and trauma. If anything you hear is activating, please reach out to a qualified mental-health professional. You’re not alone, and help is always available. ❗ Disclaimer: This podcast is for storytelling and educational purposes only and not a substitute for professional mental-health care or diagnosis. 🔎 Topics: family scapegoating, scapegoat healing, narcissistic abuse recovery, trauma healing, adult children of narcissists _____________________________________________________________________ This is the full transcript of Episode 1 of The Family Scapegoat Chronicles: “Family Scapegoating 101: How Healthy Healing Really Begins.” Hosted by Elle Boone, this episode explores how healing from family scapegoating is real work. and why taking it slowly is often the fastest way to move forward. 📝 Transcript Some kids get trophies, some kids get gold stars, and some get scapegoat status, like me. But here's the thing, I didn't apply to be the family scapegoat. There was no job posting, no interview, and certainly no benefits package. But somehow I got the role, and I kept it for years. The good news, that training ground turned me into the perfect host for this podcast. And in this first episode, I'll walk you through how I discovered it, how I started to process it, and what it's really like to stumble your way out of the scapegoat script. They say what doesn't kill you makes you stronger, but sometimes it just leaves scars. Welcome to the Family Scapegoat Chronicles, a podcast for the silent survivors, quiet rebels, and generational cycle breakers. I'm your host, Elle Boone, fellow scapegoat and reluctant expert in family dysfunction. If you've spent years holding space for others while quietly unraveling in the pantry, you're in the right place. Done playing small to keep the peace? Good. Now it's time to take up space. So grab your favorite emotional support snack and let's get to work. Hello, hello, Welcome to the Family Scapegoat Chronicles. We made it. Episode one. Whew. I'm glad you're here. I'm sorry that you're here for the reasons that you're here, but I'm glad that you're here. I want to talk to you in this first episode about what the show is, what it is not, what you can expect, what not to expect. And also just make the statement that this is really for education and entertainment. This is not to replace therapy or any mental health service that you may need or desire. That will also be in the show notes, but I thought it would be wise to indicate that here as well. I also want to share with you in this first episode when I started to figure this out because that's when, I mean, rather than going back to childhood, which we will visit from time to time, of course, as I continue to share my story. But I thought a good starting point would be when I started to figure this out, how I started to figure it out, and talk about some of the methods that I used to educate myself on this. Although I will say that there haven't been a lot on the family scapegoat. Particularly that I could find. There are a number of podcasts that talk about it, but it's never been the focus. So I felt that a show like this was not only necessary, but really critical to the people like us that have been through what we've been through to have a place to grow in community, grow in knowledge, grow in healing, and just evolve from this identity that we have been given or that has been forced upon us and start to talk about ways of how we can get away from that identity and start rebuilding life with our true identity, our authentic selves, our future selves, so that we can start to shake off this scapegoat skin, as I like to call it, that was never really part of who we are. So going back to when I first started to figure this out, there were a few key things that took place that led me down this path of discovery. I had no idea. I've been walking around this planet for decades thinking, oh, this anxiety and this chip on my shoulder and these other behaviors that I have collected along the way, they're just who I am. No, turns out I was wrong. It's been almost five years since I started to really sift through what information I could find online. And I'm still not there yet. There's just so much to unpack and not just in my own behaviors and coping mechanisms that I have accumulated and adopted or inherited might be a better word. But then there's, you know, the, people who came before me and the people who came before them and all the other generations that have contributed to where we are today. And today we have the internet. We have so many more tools than every generation in the past combined. So I think this is really our time. I think this is our time to say, yes, this is when we stand up and we confront the issues head on and Figure it out, figure it out, make some changes, adopt new ways of behaving, have new levels of understanding of our own behaviors and those that are around us and from those that are in our past. So going back to when I first started to figure this out was in 2019, just before the pandemic. I was in the New York area. I was in full-time acting school for the third time in my life, I just had to go back. I just had to go back. And not just because I love learning, but also wanting to further my career. But I don't know, something deep inside my soul and my bones said you need to go back. So I did. And now I know why. That was such a strong impulse. Which we'll get to in a minute. But in 2019, I was in full-time acting school. I was working full-time and I commuted from New Jersey into the city five days a week. So all of that to say I was tired. I was exhausted constantly. And you know, when you're tired, things don't look right. We don't behave properly or we don't compute things. The way that we do when we're rested and feel good. So I always felt, and I blamed it on being tired, but I always felt like every time I walked into that classroom that every single person in that room hated me, absolutely hated me. And I couldn't figure out why. I, just like I said, I blamed it on being tired. And... That created a whole bunch of self-doubt and other questions and things that I hadn't figured out yet. So one day I called a friend at the time, a colleague actually, and I was complaining about these girls in the class who had just really been giving it to me and wearing me down. So we would joke about the situation, but At one point during this conversation, he said to me, Elle, I think it's time that you look at your patterns. He said, I think that there are some things that you will discover if you dig into your patterns, your behaviors that will help you a lot. And I said, okay, go on. I'm intrigued. He said, well, let me put it to you this way. Let's say you finished school. And you book a gig, this director gives you some direction and you take it wrong and you lose the gig or worse, it ruins your career. And I was like, wow, that's really, that's really heavy. That's extreme. Like, what are you talking about? And he said, I just think that there are some patterns that you have collected that aren't serving you and you're filtering life through them. Whoa, deep, right? Okay. So that was the first thing. And then in another class, Patrick, my speech teacher, he looked like Superman. It's early morning and the task for the day was to read a script that had maybe three, four lines in it. Everyone had the same script and the script was basically going off on somebody, just letting them have it. And I thought, my God, this is the dumbest thing I've ever experienced in my whole life. Like I’m paying for this? This is ridiculous. So because of that, I went last. And Patrick said, El, what's the issue? And I said, I don't want to be angry. I've worked hard to not be angry. I don't want to bring up this energy and then like live with it for the next few hours. Like, this is really dumb. And he said, OK. And I was sitting in a chair in the middle of the room. And he laid down on the floor beneath me. And he looked up at me and he said, Elle, I have a question for you. And he said, in all seriousness, he said, who are you angry at? And I was like, um, well, right now it's you. And he said, okay, but all jokes aside, who are you really angry at? He went on to say that because if you can't get in touch with that here, you are not in touch with it in life. Or on stage. You can't play a character without the authenticity, right? So that started a whole nother set of thoughts. And then one day I was sitting in a webinar that I was co-hosting, that I created for marketing for voice actors. And at one poi
