The Whole of Us

Kelsey & Tom Wauchope
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Self-Improvement

What does it really means to thrive in both the beautiful and the messy moments of life? Hosted by Kelsey and Tom Wauchope, a couple who traded burnout for connection, wonder, and peace, each episode shares honest conversations about marriage, parenting, faith, wellbeing, and living with intention. Through real stories and practical insights, they invite you to slow down, breathe deep, and rediscover what it means to live whole.

  1. May 17

    TWOU EP 24 - It Actually Works Out Okay

    We didn't plan to go quiet. We just couldn't show up regulated. And for a podcast built around wholeness we needed to honour the moment. In this episode, we get honest about the last six weeks: a half-renovated house, an old April pattern that keeps resurfacing, and a marriage that hit some familiar pain points. What carried them through? Shame resilience. A faster rupture-to-repair cycle. And a growing trust that it does, actually, work out okay. If you've ever felt like pausing meant failing — this one's for you. What we cover: When limited capacity is the honest answerApril body memory and how to hold seasonal pain gentlyShame resilience as the real game-changer in marriageWindow of tolerance — what it looks like in real fightsThe difference between toxic positivity and grounded hopeWhat consistency actually builds over time0:20 Introduction and Hiatus 0:50 Life Challenges and Renovations 2:25 Decisions and Moving Forward 3:25 Embracing Change and Control 4:52 Marriage and Personal Growth 6:24 Handling Pain and Resilience 8:21 Trust and Ownership in Relationships 10:35 Shame Resilience and Personal Reflection 13:10 April Challenges and Healing 15:26 Consistency and Social Media 17:52 Inner Critic and Control 20:35 Revisiting Pain and Building Resilience 22:26 Marriage Dynamics and Trust Building 24:19 Community and Marriage Support 27:56 Conclusion and Call for Engagement ✨ Listen to the Full Podcast 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YFuoKTYMYQBkoBqDU6RWX 🍎 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-whole-of-us/id1852384590 🎙️ Podcast page: https://thewholeofus.riverside.com/ ❤️ Follow Along https://instagram.com/thewholeofus https://facebook.com/we.are.the.whole.of.us https://www.tiktok.com/@thewholeofus 🌿 Our Website + Stories 🔗 https://thewholeofus.com/

  2. Apr 13

    TWOU EP 23 - We've Stopped Playing (And It's Killing Us)

    If you have to schedule fun, are you actually playing? We thought play was something kids did and adults outgrew. Turns out it's a survival circuit, wired into the same deep part of the brain as grief & fear. And we've spent decades suppressing it in the name of productivity. This conversation cracked something open for us. The four-part definition of real play that finally let us off the hook. Why "I'll play with the kids for five minutes" leaves everyone feeling worse. The research linking zero childhood play to seriously dysregulated adults. And the eight play types, so you can stop trying to be the parent who loves imaginary mouse games when that's not your thing. In this episode: 🎙 0:20 — Why play matters for adults, not just kids 🎙 0:56 — Redefining play beyond childhood 🎙 1:49 — How society quietly killed our ability to play 🎙 3:24 — The real definition of play (and why most of what we do isn't it) 🎙 4:20 — What other cultures still know that we've forgotten 🎙 5:20 — The Gottman finding: play predicts marriage success more than communication 🎙 8:26 — The seven subcortical circuits and why play is one 🎙 10:30 — Play dropped 25% in a single generation 🎙 16:16 — How play activates the default mode network and makes you smarter 🎙 20:31 — Why ball pits at work actually increase productivity 🎙 22:01 — Play as nervous system regulation (real mode change, not just calming) 🎙 29:18 — The eight play types: Joker, Kinesthetic, Explorer, Competitor, Director, Collector, Creator, Storyteller 🎙 36:42 — How to start playing again as an adult 🎙 40:25 — Your homework + takeaways What did you love doing between 8 and 12? It might be time to go back there… ✨ Listen to the Full Podcast 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YFuoKTYMYQBkoBqDU6RWX 🍎 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-whole-of-us/id1852384590 🎙️ Podcast page: https://thewholeofus.riverside.com/ ❤️ Follow Along https://instagram.com/thewholeofus https://facebook.com/we.are.the.whole.of.us https://www.tiktok.com/@thewholeofus 🌿 Our Website + Stories 🔗 https://thewholeofus.com/

  3. Apr 5

    TWOU 22 - Homeschooling Is Hard (Here's Why We Still Do It)

    We threw out the workbooks. Well, almost. This is the conversation we've been having behind closed doors for months. The wrestle between structure and freedom. The fear of getting it wrong. The days where everyone's crying and nobody's learning. And the quiet moments where our girls ask a stranger how their day was and actually wait for the answer. Homeschooling for us isn't about replicating school at home. It's about building something that fits our kids, their curiosity, their pace, their wiring. And it's messier than any Instagram version of it would have you believe. If you've been curious about homeschooling or just want to hear what it honestly looks like, this one's for you. 0:20 – Why We Chose to Homeschool Our Kids 1:11 – The Honest Truth About How Hard Homeschooling Is 3:10 – How to Tailor Education to Fit Your Child 4:10 – Teaching Kids Through Real World Experience 5:51 – Intrinsic Motivation vs Forcing Kids to Learn 6:39 – How Your Nervous System Affects Your Homeschool 9:28 – The Life Skills School Doesn't Teach 15:36 – Making Homeschool Work as a Family Team 17:04 – How to Start Homeschooling (What We Wish We Knew) 28:13 – Why Parents Are the Real Authority in Education ✨ Listen to the Full Podcast 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YFuoKTYMYQBkoBqDU6RWX 🍎 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-whole-of-us/id1852384590 🎙️ Podcast page: https://thewholeofus.riverside.com/ ❤️ Follow Along https://instagram.com/thewholeofus https://facebook.com/we.are.the.whole.of.us https://www.tiktok.com/@thewholeofus 🌿 Our Website + Stories 🔗 https://thewholeofus.com/

  4. Mar 29

    TWOU EP 21 - It's Time to Give Up the Dream

    What do you do when the dream you've been building your whole life starts crushing you? In this episode, we get really honest about a season we've been walking through quietly. Four years ago we sold a business and stepped away from a dream that had shaped our identity, our purpose, and our plan for the future. We held onto it for a long time. Waiting to be ready. Waiting to go back. Until we realised that holding on was the thing keeping us stuck. This is a conversation about grief, identity, courage, and what it looks like to finally surrender something beautiful that no longer fits. If you've ever… Held onto a dream long past its expiry because you didn't know who you were without itFelt crushed by the thing that was supposed to give you purposeWrestled with hope and felt guilty for not just pushing throughWondered what safety actually looks like when everything feels uncertain0:20 — What to Do When Your Dream No Longer Fits 2:06 — The Wisdom in Keeping Big Dreams Close 3:14 — Stepping Out of the Cage onto the Cliff Edge 5:07 — How to Know When It's Time to Quit 7:01 — What Happens When You Embrace the Unknown 10:15 — Why Letting Go of a Dream Feels Like Losing Identity 15:32 — How to Find Safety When Everything Feels Uncertain 20:41 — The Trap of Forcing a New Dream Too Soon 23:05 — How to Grieve a Dream (and Why It Matters) 29:15 — Finding Joy and Purpose in the In-Between ✨ Listen to the Full Podcast 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YFuoKTYMYQBkoBqDU6RWX 🍎 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-whole-of-us/id1852384590 🎙️ Podcast page: https://thewholeofus.riverside.com/ ❤️ Follow Along https://instagram.com/thewholeofus https://facebook.com/we.are.the.whole.of.us https://www.tiktok.com/@thewholeofus 🌿 Our Website + Stories 🔗 https://thewholeofus.com/

  5. Mar 22

    TWOU EP 20 - Deconstructing Faith Without Losing God

    Someone asked us recently how we incorporate God into our life. And honestly? We don't incorporate him. He's not a habit we slot in — he's become the lens through which everything else makes sense. But getting here nearly cost us everything. Our marriage, our identity, our sense of safety. We had to unlearn a version of God built on performance and guilt before we could meet the one who just wanted to sit with us in the mess. This is probably our most vulnerable conversation yet. We talk about faith deconstruction, what it meant to let God into the places we were most ashamed of, and why the kindest thing we ever did for ourselves was stop trying to be good enough. What we talk about: What deconstruction actually means (and why it's not destruction)The moment faith stopped being about rulesMeeting God in people and places we never expectedHow healing trauma and deepening faith go hand in handWhy God doesn't need you to have it all figured out0:20 How We Actually Integrate Faith Into Daily Life 1:40 Why Deconstructing Faith Doesn't Mean Destroying It 4:22 Reframing Who God Actually Is 7:11 When God Didn't Feel Safe 10:05 Vulnerability as the Gateway to Real Faith 15:24 Healing Trauma and Finding Freedom in Faith 19:08 Encountering God in Unexpected People and Places 23:25 What Unconditional Love Actually Looks Like 31:29 Why Healing Your Past Isn't Selfish 39:22 You Don't Have to Figure It Out Before Coming to God ✨ Listen to the Full Podcast 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YFuoKTYMYQBkoBqDU6RWX 🍎 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-whole-of-us/id1852384590 🎙️ Podcast page: https://thewholeofus.riverside.com/ ❤️ Follow Along https://instagram.com/thewholeofus https://facebook.com/we.are.the.whole.of.us https://www.tiktok.com/@thewholeofus 🌿 Our Website + Stories 🔗 https://thewholeofus.com/

  6. Mar 15

    TWOU EP 19 - When Being Right Starts to Taste Like Bitterness

    Have you ever felt stuck between holding tight to what you believe is true and still wanting to stay open and curious? We scrapped our planned episode and leaned into a genuine conversation about exactly that. We explore how travel shifts our lenses, why labels and opinions have become tied to our identity, the global sense of hopelessness, and why the mental health crisis feels more like animals in the wrong environment than just individual struggles. We talk about the challenge of slowing down to actually experience joy, the beauty and risk of vulnerability in our relationship with God, and the freedom that comes from processing emotions honestly. If these tensions feel familiar, come and sit with us in this unscripted wrestle. Chapters: 0:20 - Introduction1:27 - Black and White Truths3:24 - Travel and Different Perspectives5:21 - Identity and Opinions6:13 - Hopelessness and Purpose7:29 - Mental Health Crisis10:44 - Knowing God and Being Known13:05 - Mindfulness and Grounding17:33 - Relationship with God28:49 - Conclusion✨ Listen to the Full Podcast 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YFuoKTYMYQBkoBqDU6RWX 🍎 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-whole-of-us/id1852384590 ❤️ Follow Along https://instagram.com/thewholeofushttps://facebook.com/we.are.the.whole.of.ushttps://www.tiktok.com/@thewholeofus 🌿 Our Website + Stories 🔗 https://thewholeofus.com/

  7. Mar 8

    TWOU 18 - Are We Raising Kids in a World That Barely Tolerates Them?

    We shared a reel about how kids are treated in public spaces and the response was overwhelming. What struck us most wasn’t the debate about parenting styles. It was the depth of anxiety, judgment, defensiveness and grief underneath it. This episode explores: The rise of individualism in Western cultureThe loss of multi-generational communityWhy children can feel “inconvenient” in adult-centred spacesThe tension between tolerance and boundariesHow emotional regulation changes the way we respond to conflictThe danger of reducing people to ideasAnd the quiet power of small acts of kindnessWe reflect on: Hunt, Gather, Parent and what traditional cultures teach about integrating children into adult lifeFalling birth rates and shifting generational expectationsTrauma, regulation and what happens when we process pain aloneWhy outrage feels easier than curiosityAnd how option C might exist even when we feel trappedThis isn’t just about kids. It’s about whether we still know how to live together. 🎧 If this conversation stirred something in you, we’d love to hear your perspective. ✨ Listen to the Full Podcast 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YFuoKTYMYQBkoBqDU6RWX 🍎 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-whole-of-us/id1852384590 🤍 Follow Along https://instagram.com/thewholeofus https://facebook.com/we.are.the.whole.of.us https://www.tiktok.com/@thewholeofus 🌿 Our Website + Stories 🔗 https://thewholeofus.com/ Chapters 00:00 Why This Reel Went Viral 00:48 The Cruise Ship Comment That Sparked It 01:47 Western Culture vs Other Cultures Around Children 02:56 Individualism & The Loss of Community 04:12 Generational Shifts in Parenting 05:36 The Middle Ground Between Tolerance & Entitlement 07:12 Why Modern Life Feels So Overwhelming 08:48 Emotional Health Without Community 10:11 Judgment, Trauma & Not Knowing The Full Story 12:07 Teaching Kids to Belong in Adult Spaces 14:13 Integrating Children Into Real Life (Hunt, Gather, Parent) 16:15 Postnatal Psychosis, Judgment & Compassion 18:40 Rebuilding Kindness in Small Daily Ways

  8. Mar 1

    TWOU 17 - I Love My Kids. So Why Do I Still Yell?

    I love my kids. So why do I still yell? We talk about emotional regulation like it’s a destination. Like one day we’ll finally be calm enough, healed enough, patient enough. But regulation isn’t staying calm. It’s noticing what’s happening in your body before you explode. It’s recognising when your window of tolerance is small. It’s slowing down enough to choose repair instead of shame. In this episode we talk honestly about: What regulation actually is • Why awareness must come before change • How trigger logs helped us understand our bodies • The importance of safety cues • Why shame makes dysregulation worse • Repair, ownership, and modelling emotional health for our children • Teaching kids how to pause instead of explodeThis is not about achieving some perfect regulated state. It is about slowing down enough to catch what is happening inside us so we can respond instead of react. If you’ve ever thought, “I love my family… so why do I keep losing it?” this conversation is for you. ✨ Listen to the Full Podcast 🎧 Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/6YFuoKTYMYQBkoBqDU6RWX 🍎 Apple: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-whole-of-us/id1852384590 🤍 Follow Along https://instagram.com/thewholeofushttps://facebook.com/we.are.the.whole.of.ushttps://www.tiktok.com/@thewholeofus 🌿 Our Website + Stories 🔗 https://thewholeofus.com/ ChaptersIntroduction and Feedback 0:20 - Discussion on feedback received about regulation and emotional health.Understanding Regulation 0:50 - Clarifying what regulation means and its impact on daily life.Triggers and Responses 1:20 - Explanation of triggers and appropriate responses.Awareness and Dysregulation 2:11 - Importance of awareness in maintaining regulation.Emotional Health Program 2:58 - Experience with an emotional health consulting program and trigger logs.Defining Triggers 3:37 - What triggers are and examples of disproportionate responses.Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn 4:20 - Different types of stress responses explained.Somatic Experiencing 5:35 - The role of body awareness in emotional regulation.Window of Tolerance 11:01 - Concept of window of tolerance and its impact on regulation.Practical Application of Trigger Logs 12:43 - How trigger logs help in understanding and managing emotions.Safety and Regulation 20:21 - Connection between safety awareness and regulation.Parenting and Emotional Regulation 24:13 - Challenges of parenting while managing emotional regulation.Repair and Ownership 26:56 - Importance of repair and ownership in relationships.Teaching Regulation to Children 31:20 - How children learn emotional regulation from parents.Conclusion and Next Steps 34:49 - Closing thoughts and potential topics for the next episode.

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5
out of 5
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About

What does it really means to thrive in both the beautiful and the messy moments of life? Hosted by Kelsey and Tom Wauchope, a couple who traded burnout for connection, wonder, and peace, each episode shares honest conversations about marriage, parenting, faith, wellbeing, and living with intention. Through real stories and practical insights, they invite you to slow down, breathe deep, and rediscover what it means to live whole.

Information

  • Creator
    Kelsey & Tom Wauchope
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    24
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2025 Kelsey & Tom Wauchope