In the Flesh

Tess van Niel
  • 0.0 (0)
  • Sexuality

In the Flesh explores sexuality, intimacy, communication, and confidence through open, judgement-free conversations. I’m Tess, I'm a sexuality coach and I truely believe these conversations can be sex positive, empowering and playful. In each episode, I share practical insights, gentle guidance, and real talk to help you understand your desires, how to communicate clearly, and build deeper connections with yourself and others. Join me as we get real, get curious, and step fully into our authenticity!

Episodes

  1. Apr 15

    Polarity

    Women are tired. And not just "I need an early night" tired. In this episode of In the Flesh, I get honest about the bone-deep exhaustion that comes from living in constant doing mode, and why so many women have lost touch with the softer, more receptive parts of themselves. We're talking about polarity. The masculine and feminine that lives within all of us, and what happens when one side has been running the show for way too long. If you've been feeling flat, disconnected, or like you just can't stop even when your body is begging you to, this one is for you. Softness is not weakness. It's power. And your feminine is asking to be felt again 🧡 I'm a certified Sexuality Coach and founder of Seggs with Tess. Find me on Instagram @seggswithtess (⁠https://www.instagram.com/seggswithtess/⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ )or book into my upcoming live workshop Polarity at https://events.humanitix.com/polarity

    33 min

  2. Mar 10

    My 21 Day Pleasure Experience

    In this episode of In the Flesh, I share my experience completing a 21-day pleasure experience and the unexpected things it taught me about my body. I talk about what I experienced, felt and processed throughout the 3 week commitment. But more specifically a big break through moment that happened in week 2 - and how it just connected me to myself in such a mind blowing way. This experience I share is all about how spending intentional time with my body shifted the way I experience pleasure, curiosity, and connection. Sometimes the greatest teacher we have is the body itself. Follow me! ⁠https://www.instagram.com/seggswithtess/⁠⁠⁠⁠ ✨

    40 min

  3. Feb 10

    V-Day Special: Bossy Massage ❤️ 🌹

    Don't want to just do dinner and a movie this Valentines Day? Or maybe you're spending it with friends and would love to share a connecting experience together. In this episode, I explore Bossy Massage, inspired by Betty Martin and her Wheel of Consent (from The Art of Giving and Receiving). One person receives. One person gives.The receiver directs the touch, clearly and unapologetically. The giver follows. We cover how to:• Set up a safe container• Create a playful “sensation basket”• Practice different giving/receiving dynamics• Try this with a lover or a friend! Have fuuuuun! ❤️ 🌹 Follow me! https://www.instagram.com/seggswithtess/⁠⁠⁠ ✨

    30 min

  4. Jan 27

    Sex Positivity

    In this episode, I explore what sex positivity really means, beyond confidence, beyond openness, and beyond performance. We talk about how our relationship with sex shapes the way we treat other people’s sexuality. From judging porn, to not labelling people as “repressed,” this episode gently unpacks how sex positivity is less about being the most liberated person in the room, and more about being someone others feel safe around. We dive into consent as a social skill, curiosity over reaction, and how to practice sex positivity in everyday conversations, friendships, relationships, and culture. Because sex positivity isn’t just internal. It’s relational too. Come connect with me on Instagram at @seggswithtess ⁠https://www.instagram.com/seggswithtess/⁠⁠ 💫

    27 min

  5. Jan 20

    Understanding your Core Erotic Theme (CET)

    In this episode, we’re getting curious about the erotic mind! Why desire isn’t random, why what turns you on might also confuse you, and why shame so often sneaks in. Drawing on the work of Jack Morin, I explore the Four Cornerstones of Eroticism, Core Erotic Themes, and how longing, power, taboo, and inner tension shape erotic intensity. We also talk about troublesome turn-ons . The desires you might feel weird about or wish you didn’t have, and how meeting them with curiosity can create more choice. We finish with what it means to be positively erotic: desire that feels conscious, consensual, and supportive rather than performative. If this episode resonated, come hang out with me on Instagram at https://www.instagram.com/seggswithtess/ 💫

    30 min

  6. 12/15/2025

    My First Experience with Sexual Shame

    *This episode discusses sexual shame and personal sexual experiences. Listener discretion is advised* In this episode, I share my first experience with sexual shame and how it shaped the way I related to my body, my sexuality, and myself for years. Drawing on the concept of the sexual shadow from Debbie Ford’s work, I explore how shame forms, why it lingers, and what it’s taken for me to begin releasing it over the last 15 years. This is an honest, reflective conversation about reclaiming parts of ourselves we were taught to hide, and learning to meet them with compassion instead of judgment. Debbie Ford: https://thefordinstitute.com/shadow-talk Follow me on Insta: https://www.instagram.com/seggswithtess/

    40 min

  7. 12/01/2025

    The Power of your Inner Yes and No

    In this episode of In the Flesh, we break down three essentials for living in your body with clarity and confidence: agency, consent, and boundaries. We explore what it truly means to choose for yourself, to give and receive real consent, and to set boundaries that protect your energy and deepen connection. You’ll hear grounded examples, reflections inspired by Betty Martin’s Wheel of Consent. If you’ve ever struggled to say no, felt unsure of your yes, or wondered why your boundaries feel shaky, this episode gives you the language, tools, and perspective to shift that. Learn more about Betty Martin and her work:• Website: https://www.bettymartin.org• Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/bettymartinphd• Book — The Art of Giving and Receiving: The Wheel of Consent: https://www.wheelofconsentbook.com Tune in to reconnect with your body’s wisdom — and reclaim the power of your choices, your limits, and your voice. Check me out on Insta! Instagram: @seggswith tess ⁠https://www.instagram.com/seggswithtess

    40 min

  8. 11/27/2025

    Welcome to In the Flesh

    HIIIIII!! This first episode is an invitation into my world and the work I do as a sexuality coach and internal pelvic release work facilitator. I share why I got into this work, my passion for helping people reconnect with their bodies, and what you can expect from the journey ahead. You’ll hear a blend of honesty, softness, intensity, and the kind of real conversations we’re not having enough of — around pleasure, healing, embodiment, and coming home to yourself. If you’re ready for a space that feels human, honest, and safe to explore the deeper layers of your experience, you’re in the right place. Love, Tess xoxoxo Instagram: @seggswith tess https://www.instagram.com/seggswithtess

    8 min
  • 8 Episodes

About

In the Flesh explores sexuality, intimacy, communication, and confidence through open, judgement-free conversations. I’m Tess, I'm a sexuality coach and I truely believe these conversations can be sex positive, empowering and playful. In each episode, I share practical insights, gentle guidance, and real talk to help you understand your desires, how to communicate clearly, and build deeper connections with yourself and others. Join me as we get real, get curious, and step fully into our authenticity!

Information

  • Creator
    Tess van Niel
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    8
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Tess van Niel
  • Show Website
    In the Flesh