Shameproof Your Desires

Auntie Carmen, The Desire Midwife
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Sexuality
  • Daily

Shameproof Your Desires is the podcast for women standing at a turning point: divorce, loss, career change or simply the decision that you don't have to answer to anyone the same way anymore. Hosted by Auntie Carmen, The Desire Midwife, a certified sex and relationship coach, this show is for the woman who's done believing she's “too much,” especially when it comes to what she wants sexually. Auntie Carmen is your trusted, spicy friend who never shames you, she just holds space while you figure it out and nudges you a little closer to the edges you've been circling, kinky or otherwise.

  1. 5d ago

    Not Right Now, You’re a Mom: Why Kinky Desires Make Good Moms Feel Like Bad Moms

    Do you feel bad mom guilt every time a kinky fantasy pops into your head? You’re not alone. So many moms have a “drawer” where they stuffed their desires the day they became a mother, with a label that says “Not right now, you’re a mom.” In this episode of Shameproof Your Desires, Auntie Carmen, the Desire Midwife and certified sex and relationship coach, opens that drawer. Carmen talks about the unwritten good mom rules: be available, be patient, be nurturing and never want too much. She explains how those rules quietly put your sexuality on hold. You’ll learn about the Madonna/Whore complex, the old idea that a woman can be pure or sexual but never both. You’ll also hear why shame gets even louder when your desires are kinky. Wanting to be dominated, tied up or in charge after a long day of caretaking doesn’t make you a bad mom. It makes you a whole woman. Carmen shares her own story of reclaiming her sexuality after motherhood. She describes the moment her libido came roaring back and the guilt that came with it. She also talks about the good girl conditioning that kept her waiting for a permission slip that was never coming. This episode also looks at how mom guilt affects your relationship. When you see yourself as “just Mom,” your partner often does too. Carmen invites you to imagine what could change if you were the one to reclaim your desire first. Single or partnered, your desire belongs to you. If you’re a kink-curious mom wondering whether it’s normal to have kinky fantasies, this episode is for you. Learn more about the Shameproof Your Desires course here: https://shameproofyourdesires.com/shameproof-course/shameproof-course

  2. Oct 20

    Book the Balcony | Romantic Travel, Power Exchange Rituals and Keeping the Passion Alive

    What does your life look like once you’re impossible to shame? For Auntie Carmen it looks like a balcony over a lake in Italy at 5:30 in the morning. In part 3 of my travel series, she shares how she now plans trips around pleasure instead of the must-see list. And she shares how her D/s rituals keep her passion alive at home after 10 years together. If you’re kink-curious, already kinky or just want to feel close and turned on with your partner again, this episode is for you. She talks about: Romantic travel for couples and why her #1 checklist item is a gorgeous view with enough privacy to get it onHow knowing what turns you on lets you plan adventurous sex, date nights and trips around your desiresA little bit of naughty risk: a balcony at sunrise, a rented boat, a roadside stop in the French countryside and church bells through an open windowWhy a "hell yes" partner shows up when you stop toning down your sexualityThe daily dominant and submissive rituals that keeps her power exchange marriage so juicyHow sexual shame and kink shame keep you from even knowing what you wantDesires are not the problem. Shame is. Want to make this possible for yourself? Shameproof Your Desires walks you there in four weeks: https://shameproofyourdesires.com/shameproof-course/shameproof-course Ladies- join Camp Claim It on Skool https://www.skool.com/campclaimit/about For couples looking to reconnect and turn up the heat https://www.skool.com/ritual-reverence-5086/about

  3. Oct 13

    I Didn’t Know I Had Kinks | Discovering Kink and Power Exchange After Divorce

    When I got divorced, I just wanted intimacy. I had no idea I was a woman with kinks. In this episode I share how the very first person I slept with after my divorce made me curious about power. It took me from “no man will ever control me” to loving sexual submission in a consensual D/s relationship with my husband. If you’re kink-curious and stuck asking “why do I like this?” or “is this just trauma?” this one is for you. We talk about: How to discover your kinks when you don’t even know where to startWhy things you used to hate can become a turn-on once you have full consent and a real choiceThe “I want to be taken” fantasy so many women have and how to explore it safely with consent and trustWhy kink shame and sexual shame shut down your curiosity and why shameproofing comes firstYou can’t get curious and judge yourself at the same time. Ready to become impossible to shame? Shameproof Your Desires: Become Impossible to Shame, Claim Your Kinks and Have the Kind of Sex You’ve Been Craving is my four-week course. You get short mini lessons five days a week. https://shameproofyourdesires.com/shameproof-course/shameproof-course Want my kinky origin story? Listen to Season 2, Episode 6 (August 11, 2026). [link]

  4. Oct 6

    Alone at the Trevi Fountain

    I once stood in front of the most romantic fountain in Rome all by myself, on a trip with my husband. In this episode I share what that morning taught me about shrinking, staying busy and telling myself "it's fine." If you have been toning down what you want, this is your wake-up call. Ready to stop? Shameproof Your Desires is my four-week course to help you become impossible to shame, claim your kinks and start having the sex you want. https://shameproofyourdesires.com/shameproof-course/shameproof-course

  5. Sep 29

    Three Ways Shame Is Running Your Sex Life (And How to Get It Back)

    In this episode, Auntie Carmen brings together the three patterns covered in the last three episodes, the good girl lane, fantasies under lock and key, and expanding and contracting, and shows how they're actually stages of the same underlying problem: shame. She introduces the full PACT method she teaches inside Shameproof Your Desires and how it addresses all three patterns at once. Topics covered: recap of the three shame patterns, how shame evolves across stages, the PACT method, course introduction, becoming shameproof Keywords: sexual shame patterns, claiming your kink, becoming shameproof, PACT method, join shameproof your desires, kink coaching for women 🔗 Join Shameproof Your Desires: https://shameproofyourdesires.com/shameproof-course/shameproof-course

  6. Sep 22

    Expanding and Contracting: Why You Keep Retreating the Moment Someone Judges You

    In this episode, Auntie Carmen names the pattern she calls Expanding and Contracting, the cycle of getting brave, opening up, and then retreating right back into hiding the moment judgment shows up. She shares her own experience with this pattern after her divorce, why it happens even after you've done real shame work, and what changes once you become genuinely unshakable in your desires. Topics covered: fear of judgment, retreating after vulnerability, internalized shame, sexual identity integration, becoming unshakable, becoming shameproof Keywords: fear of judgment, retreating after vulnerability, external shame, internalized shame, becoming shameproof, unshakable confidence Shameproof Your Desires Course: https://shameproofyourdesires.com/shameproof-course/shameproof-course

  7. Sep 15

    Fantasies Under Lock and Key: Why Keeping Your Desires Secret Is Costing You More Than You Think

    Auntie Carmen breaks down why women keep their fantasies locked away, and what becomes possible the moment you finally say them out loud. Keywords: hidden fantasies, suppressing sexual desire, communicating sexual needs, sexual autonomy, co-creating pleasure with a partner, fear of judgment sex, kink communication, sex coach for women, shameproof desires, uncovering desire Join my free community Camp Claim It on Skool here: https://www.skool.com/campclaimit For women who know they are kinky or kink-curious but still find themselves allowing shame to make their decisions, take my self-guided course. Learn more here: https://shameproofyourdesires.com/shameproof-course/shameproof-course

  8. Sep 8

    The Good Girl Lane: Why You're Still Waiting for Permission You'll Never Get

    In this episode, Auntie Carmen names the pattern she calls the Good Girl Lane, the invisible habit of waiting for permission before claiming the sex and desires you actually want. She breaks down why this pattern forms, what it quietly costs you in real relationships, and what shifts the moment you stop waiting for a green light that was never coming. Topics covered: good girl conditioning, waiting for permission, sexual autonomy, resentment in relationships, becoming shameproof Keywords: good girl conditioning, waiting for permission, claiming your kink, sexual autonomy, women and sexual shame, shameproof desires Join Shameproof Your Desires: [course link here]Join Camp Claim It on Skool for free resources: [Skool link here]

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About

Shameproof Your Desires is the podcast for women standing at a turning point: divorce, loss, career change or simply the decision that you don't have to answer to anyone the same way anymore. Hosted by Auntie Carmen, The Desire Midwife, a certified sex and relationship coach, this show is for the woman who's done believing she's “too much,” especially when it comes to what she wants sexually. Auntie Carmen is your trusted, spicy friend who never shames you, she just holds space while you figure it out and nudges you a little closer to the edges you've been circling, kinky or otherwise.

Information

  • Creator
    Auntie Carmen, The Desire Midwife
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    56
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Auntie Carmen, The Desire Midwife
  • Show Website
    Shameproof Your Desires

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