The Wellness Esquire Podcast: Happy, Healthy, Successful Lawyers

Ariella Cohen Coleman
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Lawyers are done believing they have to choose between a kick-ass career and a kick-ass life.Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Hosted by attorney Ariella Cohen Coleman.Every Wednesday, lawyers, coaches, and thought leaders share the stories most people in law are afraid to tell: anxiety, imposter syndrome, perfectionism, identity, mistakes, and what it really takes to build a legal career on your own terms. Then we get practical about how to thrive.For attorneys, law students, and ambitious professionals changing the whole damn game. 💛

  1. 5d ago

    Perfectionism Isn't a Flaw: Why I Stopped Being a "Recovering Perfectionist" | with Ariella Cohen Coleman

    Perfectionism isn't something lawyers need to recover from. It's something we need to get better at. 🤣 In this solo episode, I get honest about my own perfectionism: the decades I spent beating myself up for tiny mistakes, the podcast (this one) that I kept not launching, and why calling myself a "recovering perfectionist" quietly dulled my sparkle. I spent most of my life as a maladaptive perfectionist, and I didn't have the language for it until I read my all-time favorite book, The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control by Katherine Morgan Schafler. I share what shifted when I started seeing perfectionism as part of who I am, something to aim in a healthy direction, not remove. I also talk about hiring a friend to press publish on the podcast because I couldn't do it myself, learning to surf this year and being objectively not good at it (and loving it!!), and why you can absolutely burn out doing work you love. In this episode: Maladaptive vs. adaptive perfectionism, and why the difference changes everythingWhy "if you can't face a mistake, you can't learn from it"How treating everything like a lab (throwing spaghetti at the wall) made me a better attorneyWhy I quit calling myself a recovering perfectionistExcelling on your own values, not someone else'sWork-life integration, and why loving your work doesn't make you burnout-proofA community challenge: the one thing you've been scared to doMentioned in this episode: The Perfectionist's Guide to Losing Control by Katherine Morgan Schafler, and Whitney Harper of Advos Legal. Tell me the one thing you've been scared to do and are going to do anyway: ariella@thewellnessesquire.com, or find me on LinkedIn and Instagram (@ariellacohencoleman, @thewellnessesquire). New episodes on Wellness Wednesdays! Follow and subscribe to The Wellness Esquire, and send this one to a lawyer who needs it. 💛 We'd love to hear from you through Fan Mail! Host: Ariella Cohen Coleman The Wellness Esquire: Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Ariella Law, PC: strategic legal support for entrepreneurs, growing companies, and mission-driven organizations. Formation, contracts, compliance, and fractional general counsel, by project or by subscription. Follow Ariella: LinkedIn · Instagram · Website Follow The Wellness Esquire: Website · Substack · Instagram Sponsor: Superhuman: email, faster. Get one month free Thank you for listening! Subscribe, share, and review. 🤩

  2. Sep 16

    Who Am I Without Law? Erin Gerner on Rebuilding a Lawyer's Identity

    You don't hate being a lawyer. You hate the way you're doing it. Erin Gerner spent years believing she had to choose between being a lawyer and being herself, and this conversation is about everything she found on the other side of that lie. Erin excelled at the path everyone told her to want. Top of her class, then big law, then physically sick before work every morning. When the 2008 crash ended her firm job and a premature baby changed her whole world, she walked away from the law entirely, and ran straight into a question she couldn't answer: who is Erin if she's not a lawyer? What she rebuilt from there, the creativity and community and coaching that law had buried, eventually led her back to practice, this time on her own terms. If you have ever wondered whether you're in the wrong career or just doing it the wrong way, this one is for you. In this episode: Why "I don't want any of this" in big law was information, not weaknessThe identity crisis almost no one warns you about when you step back from the lawWhy the answer is usually not burning it all down, but small, simple changesHow Erin built a coaching practice (and a full cohort) before she had a programWhat it took to come back to practice after a decade away, and quiet the self-doubtWhy "and" might be the most important word a lawyer can learn00:00 Two beach-loving, "yay"-saying lawyers find each other 04:47 Becoming a digital nomad: "we just did it" 09:47 Why she went to law school, and following the path 12:10 Big law, and being physically sick before work 15:36 "Everyone else seemed fine," and why that's a lie 18:00 A baby born seven weeks early changes everything 20:29 The identity crisis: who is Erin without the law? 24:23 Rediscovering the parts the law had sucked out 28:02 Doing it messy and scared 30:20 "Why are you not helping lawyers?" 32:16 Forty women in the DMs, and no program yet 38:33 You don't hate law, you hate how you're doing it 43:57 What success actually means now 45:29 Going back to practice, on her own terms 49:54 Coaching baby-lawyer Erin through the self-doubt 55:44 The one lesson: the power of "and" About Erin Gerner: Erin is a lawyer, coach, and host of the Powerhouse Lawyers podcast. She helps women lawyers redefine success and design careers and lives that actually fit them, and recently returned to practice under a firm model built for entrepreneurial attorneys and those who are looking to build their practices on their own terms. Links: Website https://www.eringerner.com/ |LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/in/erin-gerner/ | Powerhouse Lawyers on Apple https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/powerhouse-lawyers/id1686603658 | Spotify https://open.spotify.com/show/0KpzrGa6PkI7U2HKwpPSQq New episodes weekly! Subscribe to The Wellness Esquire so you never miss an episode! We'd love to hear from you through Fan Mail! Host: Ariella Cohen Coleman The Wellness Esquire: Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Ariella Law, PC: strategic legal support for entrepreneurs, growing companies, and mission-driven organizations. Formation, contracts, compliance, and fractional general counsel, by project or by subscription. Follow Ariella: LinkedIn · Instagram · Website Follow The Wellness Esquire: Website · Substack · Instagram Sponsor: Superhuman: email, faster. Get one month free Thank you for listening! Subscribe, share, and review. 🤩

  3. Sep 9

    I Lead the Lawyer Wellbeing Movement, and I Still Won't Rest | with Ariella Cohen Coleman

    OK, that was a bit nerve-wracking, but it went way better than I expected! I already have a page of notes for myself for next time, and I'm super excited to do more of these solo episodes. Partly because I have so many ideas about how to bring tons of value to our community, and partly because this is the next thing to do that scares me a little. I used to run from things that scared me, now (apparently) I run (or crawl) toward them. So here's my first solo episode. I am one of the leaders of this whole lawyer wellbeing movement, and I just got over being sick - and I got sick because I didn't listen to my body. I added a lot to my plate without taking anything off it, and then I didn't truly rest. In this convo, I get honest about that, about why I started The Wellness Esquire when I'm not always very good at the whole wellbeing thing, and about some of the things I'm doing to help myself avoid this from happening again... And, btw, there's so much more I'm doing to take care of myself that I didn't talk about here, and I'm excited to get into that in another episode. That topic on its own could be its own multi-series. In this episode: - Why a solo episode felt scarier than any interview I've ever done - The confidence people say they see in me, and why it's newer than you'd think - How I talked myself into taking on too much, and the moment my body made me stop - What knowing the science of wellbeing does and doesn't do for you (my conversation with Jordana Confino) - Setting boundaries with clients: why it used to terrify me and why I love it now Chapters: 00:00 Why a solo episode felt scarier than any interview 02:23 The confidence you see in me is new, and hard-won 05:20 Why today: I got sick because I didn't listen to my body 07:18 Knowing wellbeing matters vs. actually doing it (with Jordana Confino) 11:54 The freedom that lets me live this way, and the "a lot" that comes with it 17:43 My city nervous system vs. my jungle nervous system 20:09 I'm bad at resting, and even my trainer knows it 22:36 The recap: what I took on, and what I'm changing 28:30 Setting boundaries with clients used to terrify me 32:38 Why I built this: what if we don't all have to hit rock bottom first New episodes every week for Wellness Wednesday. Follow The Wellness Esquire so you never miss an episode. 💗 We'd love to hear from you through Fan Mail! Host: Ariella Cohen Coleman The Wellness Esquire: Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Ariella Law, PC: strategic legal support for entrepreneurs, growing companies, and mission-driven organizations. Formation, contracts, compliance, and fractional general counsel, by project or by subscription. Follow Ariella: LinkedIn · Instagram · Website Follow The Wellness Esquire: Website · Substack · Instagram Sponsor: Superhuman: email, faster. Get one month free Thank you for listening! Subscribe, share, and review. 🤩

  4. Sep 2

    Harassed by the Judge She Clerked For: Aliza Shatzman on Fighting Back

    Law clerk harassment is one of the legal profession's best-kept secrets, and Aliza Shatzman lived it. A federal judge harassed her, fired her, and then torpedoed her dream job as a homicide prosecutor with a single negative reference she was never allowed to see. Then she found out she couldn't sue him, because 30,000 people who work for the federal courts have no protection under Title VII. I have my own (much less dramatic) version of this story, from a networking event my 1L year, so this conversation went straight to the thing so many of us carry quietly: you feel a power imbalance, you feel confused and alone, and you have no idea who to tell and what to do. Aliza's answer is bracing and hopeful. You have more power and agency than you think, and using your powerful voice is what makes it better for everyone who comes after you. In this episode: - What actually rises to the level of harassment, and why "it's just a bad fit" is a lie you don't have to accept - Why filing a formal complaint is the single best way to protect yourself from retaliation - The power dynamic that makes law students, clerks, and junior associates most vulnerable, and how to navigate it - How Aliza turned the worst moment of her career into the Legal Accountability Project - The internal reporting channels that exist, and which ones are actually HR for the judiciary In this episode: 00:00 The 1L networking story that started this 05:53 What drew Aliza to law school 07:11 The clerkship that changed everything 10:26 The negative reference that cost her the dream job 12:19 Why 30,000 court employees have no Title VII protection 16:07 You are not powerless: your voice is your power 18:11 Glassdoor for Judges and the daily work of accountability 22:47 What actually counts as harassment 30:38 Your real options: EDR, DWR, and formal complaints 32:57 Retaliation, and why a written record protects you 39:41 Building a life and a career on her own terms About Aliza: Aliza Shatzman is an attorney, advocate, and the President and Founder of the Legal Accountability Project, a nonprofit working to ensure law clerks have positive clerkship experiences and extending accountability to a judiciary that has long operated without it. Links: Legal Accountability Project: https://www.legalaccountabilityproject.org/ Aliza on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/aliza-shatzman-58b55223/ LAP on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/thelegalaccountabilityproject/ New episodes weekly. If you're a lawyer who has ever felt this, you're not alone. Follow The Wellness Esquire so you never miss an episode! We'd love to hear from you through Fan Mail! Host: Ariella Cohen Coleman The Wellness Esquire: Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Ariella Law, PC: strategic legal support for entrepreneurs, growing companies, and mission-driven organizations. Formation, contracts, compliance, and fractional general counsel, by project or by subscription. Follow Ariella: LinkedIn · Instagram · Website Follow The Wellness Esquire: Website · Substack · Instagram Sponsor: Superhuman: email, faster. Get one month free Thank you for listening! Subscribe, share, and review. 🤩

  5. Aug 26

    Why So Many Successful Lawyers Feel Like Nothing Inside: David Sazant on Self-Worth and Identity

    You can look like you have it all together, everything tied up in a beautiful little bow, and still feel like a fraud on the inside. David Sazant, a former litigator turned therapist for lawyers, says that gap is one of the most common things his clients are too ashamed to say out loud. We talk about why so much lawyer anxiety, imposter syndrome, even anger is really about self-worth, and why the self-worth we build on other people's approval never holds. So much of this, for David, comes back to identity, to who we are and who we know ourselves to be. If you think you're the only one who struggles with these feelings, David and I promise you, you're not. In this episode: - Why so many high-achieving lawyers feel like frauds no matter what they accomplish - Why self-worth built on other people's approval never holds, and how to start internalizing your own - The difference between "I am anxious" and "I'm experiencing anxiety," and why it changes everything - Why anger is so often just not feeling good enough wearing a different face - Why saying the hard thing out loud is where connection starts, not where your credibility ends About David: David Sazant is a former litigator turned therapist and the founder of Pursuit Counseling and Therapy, a practice serving men, many of them Ontario-based lawyers and other high-performing professionals.  Connect with David at Pursuit Counseling  New episodes weekly! If you're a lawyer who has ever felt this, you're not alone. Follow The Wellness Esquire so you never miss an episode. We'd love to hear from you through Fan Mail! Host: Ariella Cohen Coleman The Wellness Esquire: Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Ariella Law, PC: strategic legal support for entrepreneurs, growing companies, and mission-driven organizations. Formation, contracts, compliance, and fractional general counsel, by project or by subscription. Follow Ariella: LinkedIn · Instagram · Website Follow The Wellness Esquire: Website · Substack · Instagram Sponsor: Superhuman: email, faster. Get one month free Thank you for listening! Subscribe, share, and review. 🤩

  6. Aug 19

    How to Be a Happy Lawyer in Six Minutes a Day, with Jennifer Gillman

    You do not have to choose between being a successful lawyer and a happy one, and you do not have to wait for some future season to be both. Unraveling that false narrative is what Jennifer Gillman does with her clients. She's a lawyer turned recruiter for rainmakers, and she says the craziest thing: taking care of yourself and aligning your work with your values isn't the reward you get once you make it. It's how you get to be successful and happy at the same time. In this episode: - Why your fourteenth draft at 3am is making the brief worse, not better - The lie that you have to be miserable now to earn your happiness later - Why the "wrong firm" is almost never a bad lawyer or a bad firm, just a bad match - How to see your own situation clearly when you can't read the label from inside the bottle - Why it's never too late, even at 50 with no book of business Chapters: 00:00 Meeting Jennifer 04:35 From a family of lawyers to leaving practice 08:31 The accidental pivot into recruiting 13:15 Starting her own firm and betting on lawyer happiness 15:59 The Six Pillars of a happy rainmaker 16:02 Pillar 1: Care for yourself 21:22 The "point one" method: six-minute change 24:50 Pillar 2: Build business 26:50 Pillars 3 to 6: Boundaries, planning, learning, legacy 29:56 What it's actually like to work with Jennifer 38:39 Ariella's concussion and the gift of boredom 43:41 The results: more free time AND more money 50:05 Fear, risk, and reading the label from inside the bottle 53:57 One magic-wand change for the legal industry 57:08 It's never too late About Jennifer: Jennifer Gillman is the President and Founder of Gillman Strategic Group, a legal recruiting firm where she helps successful partners and rainmakers with portable business find the perfect fit at another firm, which can make a dramatic difference in their career and personal satisfaction. Her superpower is being able to tell in 15 minutes whether a law firm partner would be happier changing firms or if their current firm is the best fit. After practicing law herself for 12 years, Jennifer built her work around a simple belief: successful lawyers should be happy, too. Links: Jennifer Gillman: https://gillmanstrategicgroup.com/ | LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jennifer-gillman-law-firm-matchmaker/ | Jennifer's book, The Happy Rainmaker: https://gillmanstrategicgroup.com/the-happy-rainmaker/ New episodes weekly. If you're a lawyer who has ever felt this, you're not alone. Follow and subscribe to The Wellness Esquire so you never miss an episode. 🤩 We'd love to hear from you through Fan Mail! Host: Ariella Cohen Coleman The Wellness Esquire: Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Ariella Law, PC: strategic legal support for entrepreneurs, growing companies, and mission-driven organizations. Formation, contracts, compliance, and fractional general counsel, by project or by subscription. Follow Ariella: LinkedIn · Instagram · Website Follow The Wellness Esquire: Website · Substack · Instagram Sponsor: Superhuman: email, faster. Get one month free Thank you for listening! Subscribe, share, and review. 🤩

  7. Aug 12

    She Made Her World Smaller and Smaller to Survive Law. Then She Found the Happy Lawyers. | Emily Long

    On this episode of The Wellness Esquire Podcast, host Ariella Cohen Coleman sits down with Emily Long, a former prosecutor turned solo firm founder who knew she was going to be a lawyer at nine years old. Emily got the exact career she pictured: law school at 20, practicing by 23, in court every single day as a prosecutor. What she did not expect was how heavy it would feel, or that she had been carrying a lifelong anxiety she had never even named. To cope, she got very good at control, until she realized she had quietly shrunk her whole world down to a box she could manage. This is the story of how she found her way out, found the secret group of happy lawyers, and is now building a firm on her own terms. Emily Long is the founder of Long Legal PLLC, a business law firm based in St. Petersburg, Florida. A Florida native and sixth-generation entrepreneur, Emily works as fractional general counsel and business counsel for entrepreneurs, small businesses, and nonprofits, supporting them from vision through launch to growth. Her practice spans business formation, contract analysis and development, and nonprofit formation and governance, built on a more modern and personalized approach to legal support than the traditional firm model. The firm's roseate spoonbill logo, inspired by the birds Emily grew up around while kayaking in Florida, reflects her philosophy of whole-business health and building foundations that let people and businesses flourish. Learn more at longlegalfl.com, connect with Emily on LinkedIn, or follow her on Instagram. We'd love to hear from you through Fan Mail! Host: Ariella Cohen Coleman The Wellness Esquire: Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Ariella Law, PC: strategic legal support for entrepreneurs, growing companies, and mission-driven organizations. Formation, contracts, compliance, and fractional general counsel, by project or by subscription. Follow Ariella: LinkedIn · Instagram · Website Follow The Wellness Esquire: Website · Substack · Instagram Sponsor: Superhuman: email, faster. Get one month free Thank you for listening! Subscribe, share, and review. 🤩

  8. Aug 5

    They Asked 1,100 Women in 60 Countries About Failure. What They Found Should Change How Lawyers Handle It - with Deborah Grayson Riegel

    In this episode, I sit down with executive communication coach and keynote speaker Deborah Grayson Riegel. Lawyers are trained to never make a mistake, which is a brutal setup for a human being. For her book Aim High and Bounce Back, Deb and co-author Fiona Macaulay surveyed 1,100 women across 60 countries to understand why failure lands differently for women. Deb coaches leaders at Wharton, Columbia, and Duke on communicating with confidence, and has managed anxiety and OCD her whole life. We recorded the morning after her husband's accident, with their month in Scotland just canceled, and she was refreshingly honest about performing at a high level while your brain works against you. In this episode: What their 1,100-woman study revealed about failureWhy "confidence" might not be your real problemThe five kinds of failure, and why naming yours mattersDeb's three-step method for bouncing backThe mistakes policy I just rolled out at my own firmA one-line reframe that shuts down imposter syndromeConnect with Deborah Grayson Riegel: deborahgraysonriegel.com | LinkedIn Connect with Ariella: thewellnessesquire.com | ariellacohencoleman.com | LinkedIn | @thewellnessesquire We'd love to hear from you through Fan Mail! Host: Ariella Cohen Coleman The Wellness Esquire: Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Ariella Law, PC: strategic legal support for entrepreneurs, growing companies, and mission-driven organizations. Formation, contracts, compliance, and fractional general counsel, by project or by subscription. Follow Ariella: LinkedIn · Instagram · Website Follow The Wellness Esquire: Website · Substack · Instagram Sponsor: Superhuman: email, faster. Get one month free Thank you for listening! Subscribe, share, and review. 🤩

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Lawyers are done believing they have to choose between a kick-ass career and a kick-ass life.Authentic conversations showcasing all the ways to do law differently, for lawyers who want a thriving career and a happy life. Hosted by attorney Ariella Cohen Coleman.Every Wednesday, lawyers, coaches, and thought leaders share the stories most people in law are afraid to tell: anxiety, imposter syndrome, perfectionism, identity, mistakes, and what it really takes to build a legal career on your own terms. Then we get practical about how to thrive.For attorneys, law students, and ambitious professionals changing the whole damn game. 💛

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