THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell

Lloyd Hassell
  • 4.5 (2)
  • Personal Journals

There's a moment before everything changes — a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say — that you don't recognize until you're looking back at it. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and quiet internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time, and the possibilities still available in life.Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world.Through personal reflections and thoughtful conversations, Lloyd and occasional guests explore changing identities, relationships, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves and our lives over time.The biggest swing isn't always dramatic.Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything.

  1. Oct 2

    I Didn't Know How To Be Loved

    I didn't even know how to like myself. For years, I thought saying the words - telling someone I loved them - was the same as knowing how to let them love me back. It wasn't. I kept everyone at arm's length: my children, my wife, the people who opened themselves up to me and got nothing but distance in return. I called it being guarded. The truth is I was never comfortable enough with myself to let anyone else be comfortable with me. This one's about what I'm finally learning, this late: that love isn't a feeling you announce. It's a consistency you show up with, especially in the quiet, everyday moments nobody's keeping score on. I'm not finished with this. I'm just paying attention now. If there's someone you've been keeping at a distance, you probably already know who they are. You don't have to fix it today - just notice it. Send us Fan Mail THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell There's a version of you that existed before something shifted - before a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say. You don't always recognize the moment it happened. You just notice, later, that you're not who you were. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and subtle internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time - and the possibilities still available in life. Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world. Through personal reflections and conversations, Lloyd explores changing identities, relationships, self-trust, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves over time. This is for people who are quietly realizing they are not the same person anymore - and that there are still choices left. The biggest swing isn't always dramatic. Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything. If something here stayed with you, you can reach me at lloyd@theebigswing.com

  2. Sep 18

    My Son Asked Me One Question

    My youngest son asked me a question on the phone recently that I haven't been able to shake: how does it feel that none of your children speak with you? That question is true, and it's the reason this episode isn't comfortable - but comfortable was never the point of this show. I talk about how my anger, over years, turned my kids away from me. Not all at once. Slowly, until the silence became the normal state of things. I talk about the difference between wanting to reconcile and being able to force it, and why I've had to accept that healing happens on their timeline, not mine. If you're a parent and any piece of this sounds familiar, I hope this catches you before the silence has to teach you the same lesson it taught me. Listen to companion song: The Days I've Got, performed by Marcus Reese. Send us Fan Mail THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell There's a version of you that existed before something shifted - before a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say. You don't always recognize the moment it happened. You just notice, later, that you're not who you were. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and subtle internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time - and the possibilities still available in life. Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world. Through personal reflections and conversations, Lloyd explores changing identities, relationships, self-trust, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves over time. This is for people who are quietly realizing they are not the same person anymore - and that there are still choices left. The biggest swing isn't always dramatic. Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything. If something here stayed with you, you can reach me at lloyd@theebigswing.com

  3. Sep 4

    I Can't Tell You Everything

    I wish it would end. I'm in the middle of something I can't fully talk about yet.  Legal matters. Financial matters.  A body that's 62 years old and doesn't move like it used to.  And underneath all of it, one question I can't answer: what does my life even look like six months from now? This episode isn't about the details - I can't share those yet, and it wouldn't be fair to the people involved. It's about something I think might be more useful anyway: what limbo actually does to a person, and how close I've come to losing myself in it while I wait for things I can't control to work themselves out. If you're in your own version of this - waiting on a diagnosis, a settlement, a decision that isn't yours to make alone - I see you.  This one's for you too.   Send us Fan Mail THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell There's a version of you that existed before something shifted - before a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say. You don't always recognize the moment it happened. You just notice, later, that you're not who you were. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and subtle internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time - and the possibilities still available in life. Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world. Through personal reflections and conversations, Lloyd explores changing identities, relationships, self-trust, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves over time. This is for people who are quietly realizing they are not the same person anymore - and that there are still choices left. The biggest swing isn't always dramatic. Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything. If something here stayed with you, you can reach me at lloyd@theebigswing.com

  4. Aug 21

    I Escaped To A Cemetery

    A cemetery gave me hope at times.  Not a metaphor - a real place I used to drive to during the darkest stretch of my life. I talk about what four years of depression taught me, why I kept telling one person "I'll figure it out" even when I didn't believe it, and what it means to make it through - not perfectly, but through.  If you're in a dark period, this one's for you. Send us Fan Mail THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell There's a version of you that existed before something shifted - before a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say. You don't always recognize the moment it happened. You just notice, later, that you're not who you were. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and subtle internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time - and the possibilities still available in life. Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world. Through personal reflections and conversations, Lloyd explores changing identities, relationships, self-trust, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves over time. This is for people who are quietly realizing they are not the same person anymore - and that there are still choices left. The biggest swing isn't always dramatic. Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything. If something here stayed with you, you can reach me at lloyd@theebigswing.com

  5. Aug 7

    She Knew Before I Told Her

    Two weeks ago, a friend told her story - 361 pounds to 172, GLP, surgeries, a fight she never let show on her face.  What I didn't tell you then was what I actually thought when I met her.  This week, I go back to that beginning — and to something that happened in a dentist's chair today that cracked it wide open.  She knew before I told her. I'm still not sure how. Send us Fan Mail THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell There's a version of you that existed before something shifted - before a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say. You don't always recognize the moment it happened. You just notice, later, that you're not who you were. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and subtle internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time - and the possibilities still available in life. Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world. Through personal reflections and conversations, Lloyd explores changing identities, relationships, self-trust, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves over time. This is for people who are quietly realizing they are not the same person anymore - and that there are still choices left. The biggest swing isn't always dramatic. Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything. If something here stayed with you, you can reach me at lloyd@theebigswing.com

  6. Jul 24

    The Weight She Didn't See

    She never noticed the weight coming on.  Not really - her clothes grew with her, her confidence never dipped, and by her own account she wore it well. Then a routine pre-surgery exam found something she hadn't seen coming either.  She talks with Lloyd about the difference between confidence and awareness, the day everything she'd been avoiding finally had a name, and the ordinary chair in an ice cream parlor that told her more about how far she'd come than any scale ever did. After listening: read the companion reflection inspired by this episode at, theebigswing.com/reflections or hear the companion song 'I Made Up My Mind' at theebigswing.com/sessions Send us Fan Mail THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell There's a version of you that existed before something shifted - before a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say. You don't always recognize the moment it happened. You just notice, later, that you're not who you were. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and subtle internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time - and the possibilities still available in life. Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world. Through personal reflections and conversations, Lloyd explores changing identities, relationships, self-trust, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves over time. This is for people who are quietly realizing they are not the same person anymore - and that there are still choices left. The biggest swing isn't always dramatic. Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything. If something here stayed with you, you can reach me at lloyd@theebigswing.com

  7. Jul 10

    I've Chased The Wrong Things

    For much of my life, I chased security, money, responsibility, and what I thought I was supposed to want. But while I was out walking, a thought came to me that I could not shake: What if I have been chasing the wrong things? At sixty-two, time feels different. The future no longer feels endless, and the possibility of reaching the end of my life with important parts of myself still unexplored has become harder to ignore. In this episode, I confront the fear of wasted time, the dreams I kept postponing, and the life I built around safety rather than aliveness. I do not want my unfinished desires waiting for me at the end, asking why I never gave them a chance. So I am asking myself a different question now: What would it take to make the rest of my life interesting, engaging, and truly my own? This is a reflection on regret, responsibility, courage, and the decision to stop playing safe while there is still time to live differently. Send us Fan Mail THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell There's a version of you that existed before something shifted - before a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say. You don't always recognize the moment it happened. You just notice, later, that you're not who you were. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and subtle internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time - and the possibilities still available in life. Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world. Through personal reflections and conversations, Lloyd explores changing identities, relationships, self-trust, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves over time. This is for people who are quietly realizing they are not the same person anymore - and that there are still choices left. The biggest swing isn't always dramatic. Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything. If something here stayed with you, you can reach me at lloyd@theebigswing.com

  8. Jun 27

    The Strangers We Let In

    Today started as the first time I sat down to record and did not know exactly what I wanted to say. But maybe that was the point. In this episode of THEE BIG SWING, I reflect on two very different encounters: one conversation that felt more like being questioned than being known, and another with an 80-year-old woman who slowly let her guard down and reminded me how rich human connection can be. Everybody starts as a stranger. The question is whether we are willing to move past the surface long enough to discover who is really in front of us. This episode is about guardedness, vulnerability, time, aging, curiosity, and the quiet beauty of letting people in. Note: This episode is part of a new creative direction for THEE BIG SWING, where select episodes are paired with an original companion song The Strangers We Let In, performed by Tadeo Vilar from THEE BIG SWING STUDIOS. After listening: read the companion reflection at, theebigswing.com/reflections and hear the original song inspired by this episode at, theebigswing.com/sessions The episode tells the story. The song carries the feeling. Send us Fan Mail THEE BIG SWING with Lloyd Hassell There's a version of you that existed before something shifted - before a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say. You don't always recognize the moment it happened. You just notice, later, that you're not who you were. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and subtle internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time - and the possibilities still available in life. Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world. Through personal reflections and conversations, Lloyd explores changing identities, relationships, self-trust, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves over time. This is for people who are quietly realizing they are not the same person anymore - and that there are still choices left. The biggest swing isn't always dramatic. Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything. If something here stayed with you, you can reach me at lloyd@theebigswing.com

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About

There's a moment before everything changes — a conversation, a decision, a thing you almost didn't say — that you don't recognize until you're looking back at it. This is a reflective podcast about those moments: the emotional reckonings and quiet internal recalibrations that change our trajectory over time, and the possibilities still available in life.Each episode explores what happens when curiosity, courage, accountability, or reflection opens a new way of seeing ourselves and the world.Through personal reflections and thoughtful conversations, Lloyd and occasional guests explore changing identities, relationships, and the quiet decisions that alter how we see ourselves and our lives over time.The biggest swing isn't always dramatic.Often, it's the shift inside that changes everything.

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