Heart Work After Betrayal | Infidelity, Marriage, Forgiveness, Loneliness, Trust

Julia Carlton - Relationship Coach & Infidelity Recovery Mentor
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***TOP 5% GLOBALLY RANKED PODCAST*** Heart Work After Betrayal For Christian wives rebuilding trust after infidelity Are you a Christian wife trying to rebuild trust after infidelity? Do you feel alone, triggered, and torn between healing your marriage and protecting your heart? Have you been asking questions like: - How do I heal from the pain and broken trust after infidelity? - How do I rebuild trust after cheating? - How do I know whether to stay or leave? - How do I forgive without losing myself? - How do I find emotional healing and safety again? - How do I reconnect with God, myself, and my spouse after betrayal? If that sounds like you, this podcast is for you. Heart Work After Betrayal is for Christian wives who are married, have walked through infidelity, and want help navigating the pain, confusion, triggers, trauma, and loss of identity that often follow betrayal. Maybe you struggle with intense loneliness because of the broken trust by the one who was supposed to be your partner for life and feel like a rug has been pulled out from under you. Or you feel overwhelmed with the pain but still having to show up either for your kids or at work. Or you feel like you should be further along already since it’s been a few months or even years ago when you found out about the betrayal. This space is here to help you feel seen, supported, and grounded. I’m Julia Carlton, Relationship Coach and Certified 5 Voices Practitioner. After experiencing the pain of infidelity in my own marriage, I learned that healing after betrayal does not begin by trying to fix everything overnight. It begins by rebuilding trust in yourself, rebuilding your spiritual foundation, and rebuilding relational trust with wisdom, honesty, and emotional safety. Each week on this Christian marriage podcast, we focus on: rebuilding trust in yourself after betrayal rebuilding your spiritual foundation and restoring your identity in Christ rebuilding relational trust and discerning reconciliation wisely emotional healing and safety after infidelity how to trust again after cheating move towards healing your marriage without ignoring the pain healthy boundaries, forgiveness, and communication finding support when you feel alone in betrayal recovery HEART WORK after Betrayal is about doing the deep heart work required to rebuild trust with yourself and God first, restore identity, walk in forgiveness, and move forward with strength and clarity.  If you are looking for faith-based support after infidelity and want personal help rebuilding trust and discerning your next steps, I also offer private 1:1 Heart Work Coaching for Christian wives healing after betrayal. Healing is possible. Trust can be rebuilt. Emotional safety can be restored. And if reconciliation is right, a renewed relationship can be pursued with wisdom, faith, and truth.

  1. 16h ago

    56 | Spiraling Thoughts After Betrayal or Infiidelity? One Simple Practice to Catch Them Before They Take Over

    Does one frightening thought quickly turn into ten and leave you imagining the worst-case scenario? Do spiraling thoughts after betrayal or infidelity make it difficult to sleep, eat, breathe deeply, or stay present? Do you know you need to “take your thoughts captive,” but struggle to recognize the thought that started the spiral? In this Monday Heart Check, I’m sharing one simple practice to help you begin noticing your spiraling thoughts before they take over your body and imagination. Building on my conversation with my brother in Episode 55, we’ll practice getting out of the hamster wheel by learning to catch, trace, and notice your thoughts. You’ll learn how to: Catch the first thought that started the spiral Trace the thoughts that followed it Notice what happened in your body as response to your thoughts You cannot take a thought captive if you have never noticed it. This gentle practice will help you begin creating awareness, without judging yourself, forcing the thought away, or trying to solve everything at once. This Week’s Heart Work When you notice yourself spiraling, write down these four sentences: The first thought I noticed was… The next thought was… In my body, I noticed… In my imagination, I went to… Resources and Links Mentioned 📖 Scripture: 2 Corinthians 10:5 🎙️ Episode 55: Listen to my conversation with my brother about rebuilding trust and getting out of your head when healing feels overwhelming. 💌 Subscribe to receive a weekly Heart Work Love Letter from Julia 🔜 Join the Heart Work Healing Circle ***NOW OPEN***: A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal ❓ Have a question or topic idea? Ask Julia here Connect with Julia and Take Your Next Step Contact → hello@juliacarlton.com Podcast → Heart Work After Betrayal on Apple Podcasts Next Steps: Step 1: Sign up to receive weekly encouragement and practical tools straight to your inbox → Subscribe to my weekly Heart Work Love Letter Step 2: Have a question or topic idea? → Ask me a question Step 3: HEART WORK HEALING CIRCLE ***NOW OPEN*** A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal in their marriage. Come find us → Join the Heart Work Healing Circle This podcast is for informational and encouragement purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling. If you are in crisis, please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

  2. 5d ago

    55 | Feeling Triggered or Hopeless After Betrayal? Here’s What to Do | Q&A With A Therapist, Part 2

    Are you finding yourself feeling stuck trying to rebuild trust with your spouse and wondering why nothing seems to produce the lasting change you are longing for? Do you find yourself so triggered in certain moments that you don’t even recognize yourself anymore and then feeling ashamed or guilty why you cannot hold it together or why you are not further along? Are you stuck in your head, thoughts going around and around like a hamster wheel, putting in what feels like so much effort but not getting anywhere and longing for someone to tell you there is actually a way out of this? This is Part 2 of a practical and very encouraging conversation with my brother, a licensed marriage and family therapist. During it, I ask him three more questions most women have who are recovering from broken trust. Today you will learn about: mistakes women make when trying to rebuild trust after betrayal: over emphasizing feelings or cutting them off entirely, blaming yourself or your husband because blame feels justified, and focusing on what you do not want instead of what you actually do. asking different questions, for example: Instead of “Does he deserve my trust?” ask, “What do I want the outcome to be and what can I do to get closer to that?" how betrayal affects the nervous system and what that means practically for the trust rebuilding process. approaching yourself with empathy by wondering what you are actually capable of in a highly triggered moment instead of expecting more of yourself than you have available right now. leaning into curiosity instead of interrogation. turning toward the person inside you by asking questions like where am I at? What do I need? What will actually work for me right now? how to hold on to hope when you feel like rebuilding trust is completely out of reach. There is always a way out.  This is Part 2 of a two part conversation. If you have not yet listened to Episode 53, Part 1, go back and start there first. RESOURCES AND LINKS MENTIONED 🎙️ Episode 53 "Can You Ever Trust Again After Betrayal or Infidelity? Where Rebuilding Trust Really Begins | Q&A With a Therapist Part 1” , listen to this first 💌 Subscribe to receive a weekly Heart Work Love Letter from Julia 🔜 Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist: A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal ❓ Have a question or topic idea? Ask Julia here CONNECT WITH JULIA AND NEXT STEPS Contact → hello@juliacarlton.com Podcast → Heart Work After Betrayal on Apple Podcasts Next Steps: Step 1: Sign up to receive weekly encouragement and practical tools straight to your inbox → Subscribe to my weekly Heart Work Love Letter Step 2: Have a question or topic idea? → Ask me a question Step 3: HEART WORK HEALING CIRCLE ***ALMOST OPEN*** A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal in their marriage. Get on the waitlist now  to → Join the Heart Work Healing Circle   DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational and encouragement purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling. If you are in crisis please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

  3. Aug 10

    54 | Ready to Feel Safe Again After Betrayal? How Listening to Your Body Can Finally Help You Rebuild Trust

    Have you ever walked into a room with your husband and felt your whole body tighten, even before anything was said, even before anything happened? Have you wondered why you cannot just decide to relax and trust? Do you find yourself lying awake at night with your heart racing even when nothing has happened and maybe even feeling guilty about it like you are being unfair or not trusting God enough? Have you tried to decide in your mind to trust again and found that your body simply has not gotten the memo, that no matter how much you know theologically your body still responds to him like a threat? In this Monday Heart Check I am giving you a simple practice called "The Body Check",  so you can begin to notice what safety actually feels like in your body, what threat feels like, and how to invite God's peace into the places where fear has taken up residence. Drawing on Colossians 3:15, "let the peace of God rule”, this practice brings that invitation out of the theological and into the physical. Where healing actually has to happen. RESOURCES AND LINKS MENTIONED 📖 Colossians 3:15: "Let the peace of God rule in your hearts"  🎙️ Episode 49 "The Way Out of the Emotional Rollercoaster After Infidelity or Betrayal And Why It Is Not Another Strategy" introduced the Colossians 3:15 umpire concept 🎙️ Episode 53 "Rebuilding Trust After Betrayal | An Honest Conversation With a Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Part 1" 💌 Subscribe to receive a weekly Heart Work Love Letter from Julia 🔜 Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist: A private healing community for women doing this hard holy work together ❓ Have a question or topic idea? Ask Julia here CONNECT WITH JULIA AND NEXT STEPS Contact → hello@juliacarlton.com Podcast → Heart Work After Betrayal on Apple Podcasts Next Steps: Step 1: Sign up to receive weekly encouragement and practical tools straight to your inbox → Subscribe to my weekly Heart Work Love Letter Step 2: Have a question or topic idea? → Ask me a question Step 3: HEART WORK HEALING CIRCLE *** OPENING UP THIS WEEK*** A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal. Get on the waitlist now → Join the Heart Work Healing Circle   DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational and encouragement purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling. If you are in crisis please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

  4. Aug 6

    53 | Can You Ever Trust Again After Betrayal or Infidelity? Where Rebuilding Trust Really Begins | Q&A With A Therapist, Part 1

    Have you been asking yourself whether you will ever be able to trust your husband again after the betrayal and wondering where you even begin to answer that question? Have you been watching his every move, waiting for him to prove himself, tracking whether he follows through and secretly wondering why that approach is not bringing you the peace or the clarity you were hoping for? Do you find yourself unsure whether rebuilding trust even starts with him  or whether there is something that has to happen inside you first before any of that is possible? Can you ever trust again after betrayal or infidelity? It is one of the most asked and most feared questions in the entire healing journey after betrayal. And today I am sitting down with someone whose answer is going to reframe the whole conversation. In this episode I am joined by my brother, a licensed marriage and family therapist and someone who has walked alongside me personally through some of the hardest seasons of my own healing journey. Together we are having an honest and practical conversation about where rebuilding trust actually has to begin. And it might not be where you expect. We cover what rebuilding trust actually means and what most women get wrong about it from the very start. We talk about the strong connection between trusting God trusting yourself and trusting others and why you cannot fully separate them. And we begin to explore what rebuilding trust actually looks like in the day to day reality of a marriage touched by betrayal. This is Part 1 of a two part conversation. Part 2 drops next Thursday.  RESOURCES AND LINKS MENTIONED   💌 Subscribe to receive a weekly Heart Work Love Letter from Julia 🔜 Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist: A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal ❓ Have a question or topic idea? Ask Julia here CONNECT WITH JULIA AND NEXT STEPS Contact → hello@juliacarlton.com Podcast → Heart Work After Betrayal on Apple Podcasts Next Steps: Step 1: Sign up to receive weekly encouragement and practical tools straight to your inbox → Subscribe to my weekly Heart Work Love Letter Step 2: Have a question or topic idea? → Ask me a question Step 3: Want more personal support? HEART WORK HEALING CIRCLE ***COMING SOON***: A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal in their marriage. Get on the waitlist now: → Join the Heart Work Healing Circle DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational and encouragement purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling. If you are in crisis please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

  5. Aug 4

    52 | Ready to Trust Yourself Again After Betrayal? How Saying Yes to What You Actually Want Starts Rebuilding Everything

    Have you been so focused on watching what your husband does, whether he follows through, whether he is telling the truth, whether he is proving himself, that you have completely lost touch with what you actually want? Have you become so organized around avoiding pain and protecting yourself from what might hurt you again that you have also stopped moving toward what is good and life-giving? Do you find it hard to answer the simple question "what do I actually want?”  - what you are genuinely experiencing, desiring and needing as a whole person before God? In this Monday Heart Check I am giving you the other side of the self trust practice because rebuilding self trust after betrayal is not only about saying no to what feels wrong. It is also about learning to recognize and say yes to what is good wise and life-giving. In this episode I am sharing a simple three step practice called "The Yes” - so you can begin noticing the small moments this week when you sense a genuine desire or preference and learning to bring it honestly before God and choose wisely without fear, guilt or dismissing yourself. Every small God-anchored yes you make becomes a deposit into rebuilding that trust, one honest step at a time. RESOURCES AND LINKS MENTIONED 🎙️ listen first to Episode 46 "Sick of Second Guessing Yourself After Betrayal? Try This One Simple Practice to Start Rebuilding Self Trust This Week”  💌 Subscribe to receive a weekly Heart Work Love Letter from Julia 🔜 Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist: A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal ❓ Have a question or topic idea? Ask Julia here CONNECT WITH JULIA AND NEXT STEPS Contact → hello@juliacarlton.com Podcast → Heart Work After Betrayal on Apple Podcasts Next Steps: Step 1: Sign up to receive weekly encouragement and practical tools straight to your inbox → Subscribe to my weekly Heart Work Love Letter Step 2: Have a question or topic idea? → Ask me a question Step 3: HEART WORK HEALING CIRCLE ***COMING SOON*** A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal. Come find us → Join the Heart Work Healing Circle     DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational and encouragement purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling. If you are in crisis please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

  6. Jul 30

    51 | Why Your Real Healing After Betrayal Won't Begin Until You Hit This One Turning Point

    Have you been doing everything right, maybe you are praying, trying, working on the marriage, but you still feel stuck in a way you cannot fully explain? Do you find yourself waiting for your husband to finally change, finally apologize the right way, or finally understand before you feel like you can begin to be okay? Have you ever had a moment where what came out of you in the middle of the pain shocked you? Maybe where your reactions did not look anything like the person you want to be and you wondered what was wrong with you? This is our closing episode of July, a month of Sabbath, celebration, and reflection. And I wanted to end it with the most important turning point in my entire healing journey after betrayal. In this episode I am sharing the moment that changed everything: when I realized I was powerless over my own reactions and responses, when I stopped asking God to take away my pain and started asking Him to transform my heart, and when I finally understood what it meant to get off the throne and let God be God. This is the most personal episode I have ever recorded. And I think it might be exactly what you need to hear today, especially if you are wondering why nothing seems to be moving no matter how hard you try. If you have struggled to make sense of the pain and you are even loosing hope - today’s message will give you the hope that sometimes in the midst of the greatest pain and suffering it is the very place where God begins His deepest work. RESOURCES AND LINKS MENTIONED 📖 Psalm 23 "The Lord is my shepherd"  📖 “The Lord's Prayer” Matthew 6:9-13  📖 2 Corinthians 12:10 "When I am weak then I am strong"  🎙️ Episode 43: "25 Years of Marriage - Celebrating What God Changed"  the four shifts that happened in my heart  💌 Subscribe to receive a weekly Heart Work Love Letter from Julia 🔜 Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist — A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal ❓ Have a question or topic idea? Ask Julia here CONNECT WITH JULIA AND NEXT STEPS Contact → hello@juliacarlton.com Podcast → Heart Work After Betrayal on Apple Podcasts Next Steps: Step 1: Sign up to receive weekly encouragement and practical tools straight to your inbox → Subscribe to my weekly Heart Work Love Letter Step 2: Have a question or topic idea? → Ask me a question Step 3: HEART WORK HEALING CIRCLE ***COMING SOON*** A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal in their marriage. Get your name on the waitlist, you will be the first to know when the doors open. → Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist       DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational and encouragement purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling. If you are in crisis please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

  7. Jul 27

    50 | Why Reading Your Bible After Betrayal in Your Marriage Can Feel Empty And How This One Ancient Practice Changes Everything

    Have you opened your Bible after a hard day after the betrayal in your marriage and read the words on the page and couldn’t even really comprehend them?  Do you feel guilty that Scripture does not seem to be landing the way it used to or you even wonder if something is spiritually wrong with you because you cannot seem to receive comfort from the words you know are true? Are you longing for a way to come to God in His word that goes deeper than just reading because you feel desperate for Him to speak to you in your pain? In this Monday Heart Check I am encouraging you to try an ancient practice that has been used by followers of Jesus for over fifteen hundred years and that completely changed the way I came to Scripture in the hardest season of my healing journey. "Lectio Divina” or sacred reading is simply coming to Scripture to encounter God. To listen. To receive. To be transformed by what He wants to say to you personally in this moment. We will read Lamentations 3:22-23 written by Jeremiah in the middle of complete devastation and yet full of some of the most hope-filled words in all of Scripture. As we are reading I will introduce you to the four movements of Lectio Divina: Read - lectio Reflect - meditatio Respond - oratio and Rest - contemplatio. This practice takes a few minutes and I believe it is going to open something in you that is going to prepare your heart for God to speak to you directly and exactly where you are at today.  Great is His Faithfulness!   RESOURCES AND LINKS MENTIONED 📖 Lamentations 3:22-23 "The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning. Great is your faithfulness." 📖 Lectio Divina: an ancient Christian practice of sacred reading dating back to the early church fathers 💌 Subscribe to receive a weekly Heart Work Love Letter from Julia 🔜 Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal ❓ Have a question or topic idea? Ask Julia here CONNECT WITH JULIA AND NEXT STEPS Contact → hello@juliacarlton.com Podcast → Heart Work After Betrayal on Apple Podcasts Next Steps: Step 1: Sign up to receive weekly encouragement and practical tools straight to your inbox → Subscribe to my weekly Heart Work Love Letter Step 2: Have a question or topic idea? → Ask me a question Step 3: HEART WORK HEALING CIRCLE ***COMING SOON*** A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal in their marriage. Get your name on the waitlist, you will be the first to know when the doors open. → Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist   DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational and encouragement purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling. If you are in crisis please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

  8. Jul 23

    49 | The Way Out of the Emotional Rollercoaster After Infidelity or Betrayal in Your Marriage And Why It Is Not Another Strategy

    Do you find yourself replaying conversations with your husband trying to figure out what you could have said differently to finally get the response your heart was longing for? Does his bad day become your bad day, his silence your panic, his healing your project and no matter how hard you try to stop this pattern it just keeps showing up? Have you tried every strategy and every technique to get back to peace after a hard moment and found that nothing seems to produce the lasting transformation you are actually longing for? This episode is for the woman who is exhausted from the emotional roller coaster and ready for something more than just another strategy to manage it. In this episode I am naming a very human and very predictable pattern that shows up in every marriage touched by betrayal. When your sense of okayness becomes dependent on another person's choices, behavior, healing, or response, your inner world feels out of control and you find yourself scrambling to gain back control.  The good news is there is a way out. The answer is not to try harder or apply better strategies. The greatest trap in the healing journey is trying to fix yourself or your spouse leaning on self help instead of asking for God's grace to be activated in you. Drawing on Colossians 3:15 "the peace of God as the umpire of your inner world”, this episode offers one simple question followed by a prayer that is the real and lasting way out of this pattern. This episode is practical encouragement to stop seeking more information but instead find true transformation which starts in your own heart first.  RESOURCES AND LINKS MENTIONED 📖 Colossians 3:15 "Let the peace of God rule in your hearts" 🎙️ Episode 48 Monday Heart Check 💌 Subscribe to receive a weekly Heart Work Love Letter from Julia 🔜 Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist — A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal ❓ Have a question or topic idea? Ask Julia here CONNECT WITH JULIA AND NEXT STEPS Contact → hello@juliacarlton.com Podcast → Heart Work After Betrayal on Apple Podcasts Next Steps: Step 1: Sign up to receive weekly encouragement and practical tools straight to your inbox → Subscribe to my weekly Heart Work Love Letter Step 2: Have a question or topic idea? → Ask me a question Step 3: Want more personal support? → HEART WORK HEALING CIRCLE ***COMING SOON*** A private healing community for women doing the hard holy work of rebuilding after betrayal in their marriage. Get your name on the waitlist, you will be the first to know when the doors open. → Join the Heart Work Healing Circle Waitlist   DISCLAIMER: This podcast is for informational and encouragement purposes only and is not a substitute for professional therapy or counseling. If you are in crisis please reach out to a licensed mental health professional.

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***TOP 5% GLOBALLY RANKED PODCAST*** Heart Work After Betrayal For Christian wives rebuilding trust after infidelity Are you a Christian wife trying to rebuild trust after infidelity? Do you feel alone, triggered, and torn between healing your marriage and protecting your heart? Have you been asking questions like: - How do I heal from the pain and broken trust after infidelity? - How do I rebuild trust after cheating? - How do I know whether to stay or leave? - How do I forgive without losing myself? - How do I find emotional healing and safety again? - How do I reconnect with God, myself, and my spouse after betrayal? If that sounds like you, this podcast is for you. Heart Work After Betrayal is for Christian wives who are married, have walked through infidelity, and want help navigating the pain, confusion, triggers, trauma, and loss of identity that often follow betrayal. Maybe you struggle with intense loneliness because of the broken trust by the one who was supposed to be your partner for life and feel like a rug has been pulled out from under you. Or you feel overwhelmed with the pain but still having to show up either for your kids or at work. Or you feel like you should be further along already since it’s been a few months or even years ago when you found out about the betrayal. This space is here to help you feel seen, supported, and grounded. I’m Julia Carlton, Relationship Coach and Certified 5 Voices Practitioner. After experiencing the pain of infidelity in my own marriage, I learned that healing after betrayal does not begin by trying to fix everything overnight. It begins by rebuilding trust in yourself, rebuilding your spiritual foundation, and rebuilding relational trust with wisdom, honesty, and emotional safety. Each week on this Christian marriage podcast, we focus on: rebuilding trust in yourself after betrayal rebuilding your spiritual foundation and restoring your identity in Christ rebuilding relational trust and discerning reconciliation wisely emotional healing and safety after infidelity how to trust again after cheating move towards healing your marriage without ignoring the pain healthy boundaries, forgiveness, and communication finding support when you feel alone in betrayal recovery HEART WORK after Betrayal is about doing the deep heart work required to rebuild trust with yourself and God first, restore identity, walk in forgiveness, and move forward with strength and clarity.  If you are looking for faith-based support after infidelity and want personal help rebuilding trust and discerning your next steps, I also offer private 1:1 Heart Work Coaching for Christian wives healing after betrayal. Healing is possible. Trust can be rebuilt. Emotional safety can be restored. And if reconciliation is right, a renewed relationship can be pursued with wisdom, faith, and truth.

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