Reclaiming Your Identity

Steve Rotermund
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Christianity

Reclaiming Your Identity is the podcast for spouses partnered with addicts who are ready to break free from destructive cycles and rediscover who God created them to be.   If you feel stuck, overwhelmed, or consumed by trying to fix your partner’s addiction, you’re not alone—and this space is for you. Together, we’ll unpack the impact of addiction, explore how codependency affects your emotions, actions, and relationships, and most importantly, guide you toward healing and wholeness rooted in your identity in Christ.   Through stories, biblical truths, and actionable steps, you’ll find encouragement, empowerment, and the strength to take back your life—one step at a time.  Join us every Thursday for honest conversations, practical insights, and the unwavering reminder that God sees you, loves you, and has a purpose for your life far beyond the struggles you’re facing.   This isn’t just about healing from codependency—it’s about stepping into the freedom and abundant life that Christ promises. You are more than your circumstances, and healing begins here.   Subscribe now and start your journey to reclaiming your true identity! Visit us @ https://partnersofaddicts.com

  1. Jun 12

    When The Strong One Breaks

    Send us Fan Mail You can be the one who pays the bills, calms the kids, manages the lies, and still feel like you’re disappearing. I’m talking to the person partnered with an addict who keeps it all together so well that nobody thinks to check on you, and the quiet truth is you’re running on fumes. We dig into how this “strong one” identity forms over time and why it so often turns into codependency: the pull to fix, manage, and control what your spouse won’t face. We name the real cost of living in constant crisis, including anxiety, sleeplessness, physical stress, emotional shutdown, and that hollow feeling of functioning without actually living. Then we talk about the moment the dam breaks, not always with fireworks, but sometimes in a car when a song hits and you start sobbing because you can’t carry it anymore. We also go deeper on grief and faith, especially the painful grief of losing a person who is still alive, plus the regret of “wasted years.” From a Christian perspective, I walk through 2 Corinthians 12:9 and why God’s grace meets us in weakness, not in our ability to hold everything together. The shift I’m inviting you into is simple and challenging: stop making your whole life about fixing the addict and start letting God heal you, one honest step at a time. If you heard yourself here, share this with someone who needs it, subscribe for the rest of the series, and leave a review so more partners of addicts can find real support. What would change if you told one trusted person, “I’m not okay”? 👇 YOUR NEXT STEP IS RIGHT HERE 🙏 Free Community — You don't have to walk this alone 👉 https://partnersofaddicts.com 📖 FREE GUIDES — Choose What Speaks to You: 💛 Navigating Love — Codependency & where you lost yourself 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/guide 💛 10 Truths Unspoken — What nobody told you about loving an addict 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/download 💛 Your Kids Are Watching — A guide for the sober parent 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/kids-guide 📚 READY TO GO DEEPER? 🔥 Weekend Course — You Are Not Lost 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/weekend-course 🔥 Short Course — Why You Are Stuck 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/stuck-course

    27 min

  2. Jun 5

    Learning To Receive

    Send us Fan Mail The fastest way to spot survival mode isn’t always panic or anger. Sometimes it’s a reflexive “I’m fine” when someone offers real kindness. If you’re married to an addict, you’ve probably become the strong one, the fixer, the dependable giver. That role can look like love on the outside, but inside it often feels like control: as long as I’m the one pouring out, nobody can take anything from me because I never ask for anything in the first place. We unpack why receiving feels so risky for codependent caregivers and spouses of addicts, and how that resistance is usually rooted in a wound, not a personality trait. We talk about the stories that trained us to minimize our needs: unpredictable parenting, love with a price tag, narcissistic dynamics, or a family culture where “strong” meant silent. When receiving feels dangerous, we stay half-hidden, and that keeps us from being fully known and fully loved in marriage, friendships, and faith. Then we shift into healing practices you can actually use. I share three simple steps to rebuild the skill of receiving: saying “thank you” without deflecting, letting someone help without apologizing or overexplaining, and grounding your identity in Christ through 1 John 4:19. We also sit with the prodigal son story as a picture of a Father who runs toward you before you can earn anything back. If this hits home, subscribe so you don’t miss the next part of the series, share this with someone who always says “it’s not a big deal,” and leave a review so more spouses and families affected by addiction can find support. What’s one thing you’re ready to receive this week? 👇 YOUR NEXT STEP IS RIGHT HERE 🙏 Free Community — You don't have to walk this alone 👉 https://partnersofaddicts.com 📖 FREE GUIDES — Choose What Speaks to You: 💛 Navigating Love — Codependency & where you lost yourself 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/guide 💛 10 Truths Unspoken — What nobody told you about loving an addict 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/download 💛 Your Kids Are Watching — A guide for the sober parent 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/kids-guide 📚 READY TO GO DEEPER? 🔥 Weekend Course — You Are Not Lost 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/weekend-course 🔥 Short Course — Why You Are Stuck 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/stuck-course

    23 min

  3. Jun 3

    When The Mask Comes Off

    Send us Fan Mail The mask doesn’t come off with a victory lap. It comes off with grief, and if nobody warned you, you might think you’re doing healing wrong. We’re naming what actually happens when a spouse of an addict stops performing, stops managing, and finally tells the truth about how bad it’s been. We talk through the “hiding place” codependency builds, where our worth rises and falls with the addict’s choices and we become as okay as they are that day. Then we slow down and name the two griefs many partners carry: grieving the person we thought we married and grieving the version of ourselves that existed before survival mode took over. We also share why Jesus wept matters here, because faith does not require skipping pain, and grief is not a lack of trust. From there we move into what transformation looks like: the difference between being broken down and being broken open, how honest confession is about truth not shame, and why shifting prayers from “fix them” to “Father, help me” can be the first breath of freedom. We end with practical steps you can try today, including naming one thing you’ve been pretending about and giving yourself permission to say, “I’m not okay.” If this connects with your story, subscribe, share it with someone who’s carrying this quietly, and leave a review so more partners of addicts can find hope and real support.

    26 min

  4. May 27

    You Came To Help Them And Found Yourself

    Send us Fan Mail If you’ve been living in the blast radius of addiction, you already know the routine: manage the moods, brace for the next lie, try a new plan, pray harder, hold the family together. But here’s the question that can change everything: what if the person who needs the most healing isn’t the addict, but you? We talk about what happens when you’re married to an addict and your life becomes organized around their crisis. I share why so many people come looking for help for a spouse, a friend, or a family member and then realize they’re the one who is exhausted, numb, and stuck. We dig into codependency and how it quietly reshapes your self-worth, your choices, and your sense of safety until “fixer” feels like your only role. That’s not love at its best, that’s survival. And it’s a brutal way to live. Then we turn a corner toward hope and healing rooted in identity in Christ. Your spouse’s addiction matters, but your health matters more because it’s the part you can actually surrender and change. We read Psalm 139:23-24 and treat it like an honest prayer for the partner who’s been hiding behind someone else’s problem for far too long. If you’re ready to stop pretending, stop performing, and start reclaiming your identity, this is your next step. Subscribe, share this with someone who’s carrying the secret weight of addiction in marriage, and leave a review so more spouses and partners can find real support. 👇 YOUR NEXT STEP IS RIGHT HERE 🙏 Free Community — You don't have to walk this alone 👉 https://partnersofaddicts.com 📖 FREE GUIDES — Choose What Speaks to You: 💛 Navigating Love — Codependency & where you lost yourself 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/guide 💛 10 Truths Unspoken — What nobody told you about loving an addict 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/download 💛 Your Kids Are Watching — A guide for the sober parent 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/kids-guide 📚 READY TO GO DEEPER? 🔥 Weekend Course — You Are Not Lost 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/weekend-course 🔥 Short Course — Why You Are Stuck 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/stuck-course  🎙️ LISTEN TO THE PODCAST Reclaiming Your Identity 👉 https://reclaimingyouridentity.buzzsprout.com 🌐 Learn More 👉 www.walkrightministries.com

    21 min

  5. May 22

    What Kids Absorb In Addiction Part 2

    Send us Fan Mail Your child is learning what love looks like by watching your marriage and that truth should stop us cold. When addiction, relapse, and constant crisis become the normal rhythm at home, the lesson isn’t just “substance abuse is bad.” The lesson becomes anxiety, hypervigilance, codependency, and the belief that real love means fixing someone while your own needs disappear. I dig into what kids actually absorb when we stay in the chaos without healing. We talk about the emotional cost of the hope and crush cycle, how children feel the tension through the walls, and why “I’m holding the family together” can still translate to emotional starvation for them. I also share my own story and the hard responsibility of admitting that my choices and coping patterns shaped my kids, even as I tried to manage someone else’s addiction. From a faith perspective, we anchor on the idea that God is a God of harmony, not confusion, and what it looks like to pursue peace that isn’t dependent on the addict’s current mood or sobriety. We also address the question people ask most: should I stay or leave? The focus here is getting healthy first, building boundaries, gaining clarity, and modeling what healing looks like so your kids have something better to repeat. If you’re a spouse of an addict looking for real support, I also point you toward a community and courses designed to help you take the next step. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more families can find hope and a path toward healing. 👇 YOUR NEXT STEP IS RIGHT HERE 🙏 Free Community — You don't have to walk this alone 👉 https://partnersofaddicts.com 📖 FREE GUIDES — Choose What Speaks to You: 💛 Navigating Love — Codependency & where you lost yourself 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/guide 💛 10 Truths Unspoken — What nobody told you about loving an addict 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/download 💛 Your Kids Are Watching — A guide for the sober parent 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/kids-guide 📚 READY TO GO DEEPER? 🔥 Weekend Course — You Are Not Lost 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/weekend-course 🎙️ LISTEN TO THE PODCAST Reclaiming Your Identity 👉 https://reclaimingyouridentity.buzzsprout.com 🌐 Learn More 👉 www.walkrightministries.com

    27 min

  6. May 12

    What Kids Absorb In Addiction

    Send us Fan Mail Your kids are learning something from your home right now and it may not be what you think. When addiction is in a marriage, children don’t only witness the addicted parent’s behavior; they study the sober parent’s responses, the silence, the excuses, the tension, and the ways the household rearranges itself around chaos. That’s why this conversation is one of the hardest I’ve recorded and why it matters so much.  I’m Steve, and on Reclaiming Your Identity we talk about hope, healing, and support for spouses who are partnered with an addict, grounded in your identity in Christ. Here, I walk through what research says about children of addicted parents, including how common this reality is and why risk increases across generations. Then we get painfully practical: kids learn what love feels like, what their needs are worth, and what they should tolerate by watching us survive. We also name a hidden driver many families miss: codependency being modeled by the non-addicted parent who is trying to keep everything from falling apart.  I share real stories from my own family, the cost of staying in a long cycle, and the patterns that can show up later as insecurity, resentment, denial, and even “caretaker” roles that steal childhood. Part 1 ends with one blunt question: are you willing to break the cycle before your children repeat it in their future relationships?  If you want help taking the next step, I mention a free guide linked in the show notes, plus ways to connect through partnersofatics.com and the weekend course You’re Not Alone. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more spouses can find a path toward healing and clarity. 👇 YOUR NEXT STEP IS RIGHT HERE 🙏 Free Community — You don't have to walk this alone 👉 https://partnersofaddicts.com 📖 FREE GUIDES — Choose What Speaks to You: 💛 Navigating Love — Codependency & where you lost yourself 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/guide 💛 10 Truths Unspoken — What nobody told you about loving an addict 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/download 💛 Your Kids Are Watching — A guide for the sober parent 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/kids-guide 📚 READY TO GO DEEPER? 🔥 Weekend Course — You Are Not Lost 👉 https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/weekend-course 🎙️ LISTEN TO THE PODCAST Reclaiming Your Identity 👉 https://reclaimingyouridentity.buzzsprout.com 🌐 Learn More 👉 www.walkrightministries.com

    23 min

  7. May 6

    How Many Rounds Can You Take In An Addiction Marriage?

    Send us Fan Mail You can only take so many rounds before the fight starts changing you. If you’ve been living through the rinse cycle of addiction in your marriage, a few good days, a fragile hope, then the relapse that knocks the wind out of you, you already know how exhausting it is. I’m putting clear language to that exhaustion and naming the trap: your emotional life can become so tied to an addict’s choices that your peace rises and falls with their substance use. That isn’t love or sacrifice. It’s entanglement, and it can turn your home into a constant state of survival. We walk through codependency in a practical, lived way, not as a buzzword, but as the reality of being emotionally synchronized with someone who cannot regulate themselves. I use a boxing metaphor to explain what each relapse really does to you: every broken promise is a round, every “this time will be different” is another bell, and you keep stepping back in to get hit. Then I introduce the missing piece many spouses never get: a cornerman who can tell the truth and, when necessary, throw in the towel. Not because you’re weak, but because there’s a real difference between courage and destruction, especially when kids are watching and absorbing the impact. From a faith-based lens rooted in Christian identity, we talk about where help actually comes from, using Psalm 121 to challenge the habit of looking to the next sobriety stretch as your source of stability. Your worth was established before the addiction started, and it doesn’t get handed to you by their recovery or stolen from you by their relapse. I also point you toward support through the Walk Right Community and the “You’re Not Lost” weekend course so you can start building clarity, boundaries, and healing for yourself. If this hits home, subscribe, share this with someone who’s in the ring, and leave a review so more spouses can find a way out. A FREE Online Community for help and healing @ partnersofaddicts.com Free Downloads:   Navigating Love @ https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/guide 10 Untold Truths @ https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/download Visit us @ walkrightministries.com.  Weekend Course @ https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/weekend-course

    24 min

  8. May 1

    Stop Your Waiting Room Living

    Send us Fan Mail You can love an addict and still lose yourself. When your days revolve around their mood, their relapse risk, their promises, and their “progress,” life shrinks into a waiting room where joy is postponed and peace feels impossible. We’re done calling that devotion. Today we’re naming the cost of waiting and the quiet way it turns you into a fixer, a monitor, and a manager of chaos instead of a whole person with needs, dreams, and a future. We dig into a powerful biblical framework from Ezekiel 36:26 and the difference between a heart of stone and a heart of flesh. After enough disappointment, your heart doesn’t turn cold, it turns heavy. We talk about why chosen suffering can become a prison with an open door, how codependency keeps you tethered to the addiction cycle, and why you cannot make someone else choose recovery no matter how perfectly you love, pray, or manage. Then we get practical. I share three steps you can take today to start stepping out of the waiting room: reclaim one thing that was yours, separate their progress from your peace, and let God work on you instead of obsessing over fixing them. You’ll also hear reflective questions that cut through the noise: when was the last time you asked what you need, and what you really want? If you’re looking for Christian encouragement, healing from codependency, and real-world support for spouses affected by addiction, press play. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more partners can find a place to breathe and begin again. A FREE Online Community for help and healing@ https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/landingpage Free Downloads:   Navigating Love @ https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/guide 10 Untold Truths @ https://funnel.walkrightcommunity.com/download Visit us @ https://partnersofaddicts.com

    25 min
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About

Reclaiming Your Identity is the podcast for spouses partnered with addicts who are ready to break free from destructive cycles and rediscover who God created them to be.   If you feel stuck, overwhelmed, or consumed by trying to fix your partner’s addiction, you’re not alone—and this space is for you. Together, we’ll unpack the impact of addiction, explore how codependency affects your emotions, actions, and relationships, and most importantly, guide you toward healing and wholeness rooted in your identity in Christ.   Through stories, biblical truths, and actionable steps, you’ll find encouragement, empowerment, and the strength to take back your life—one step at a time.  Join us every Thursday for honest conversations, practical insights, and the unwavering reminder that God sees you, loves you, and has a purpose for your life far beyond the struggles you’re facing.   This isn’t just about healing from codependency—it’s about stepping into the freedom and abundant life that Christ promises. You are more than your circumstances, and healing begins here.   Subscribe now and start your journey to reclaiming your true identity! Visit us @ https://partnersofaddicts.com

Information

  • Creator
    Steve Rotermund
  • Years Active
    2K
  • Episodes
    21
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Reclaiming Your Identity
  • Show Website
    Reclaiming Your Identity