Beyond the Gray

Kari Schwear
  • 5.0 (17)
  • Mental Health

You’ve built something solid. A business. A reputation. A life that looks the part. But somewhere along the way, something started feeling off. Not broken. Not a crisis. Just… not right. Maybe the drinking has become more of a habit than you'd like to admit. Maybe the marriage is stable but not exactly alive. Maybe you're still driven, but the fire feels different. You're functioning at a high level — and wondering why that still isn't enough. Beyond the Gray explores the gray areas of life that successful people rarely talk about — including gray area drinking, midlife identity shifts, relationships, faith, health, and purpose. Host Kari Schwear, founder of GrayTonic, helps business owners, leaders, and high-achievers understand what’s driving their habits, reconnect with what actually matters, and lead their lives with the same intention they bring to their work. This isn’t a sobriety podcast. And there are no labels here. Just clarity, honesty, and conversations most people are too busy performing to have. While many of Kari’s clients are men over 50 navigating these transitions, the ideas explored here resonate with anyone ready to move beyond the gray. New episodes every Tuesday.

  1. 1d ago

    How to Stop Doom Scrolling (It’s Not a Willpower Problem) | Ep. 39

    You pick up your phone to check the weather. Twenty minutes later you're stressed about something happening in a city you've never been to, and you can't remember why you picked it up in the first place. Sound familiar? In this episode, Kari explains why your phone is designed to be so hard to put down (so you can stop blaming your willpower), what doom scrolling is doing to your mood, focus, sleep, and relationships, and what you're actually hungry for when you reach for it. Drawing on insights from UC Berkeley neuroscientist Dr. Sahar Yousef, Kari shares why scrolling and drinking are like cousins, plus a 7-day scroll fast with simple swaps you can start tonight. In this episode, you'll learn:• Why your feed works like a slot machine, and why the "end of the page" disappeared• How doom scrolling affects your mood, memory, and marriage• Why scrolling is like junk food for your need for connection• What scripture says about fasting, and why every fast needs a feast• The 7-day scroll fast: the rules and what to expect day by day• Simple swaps for your morning, afternoon slump, evening, and bedtime• The SABER method for when the urge to scroll hits• Easy ways to add friction: grayscale mode, logging out, and VIP notifications Scripture referenced: Matthew 6, Daniel 10, Isaiah 58 Your challenge this week: Pick a start day for your 7-day scroll fast, and turn the hour you scroll the most into a "people window." Call a friend, talk to your spouse, or call your parents. CHAPTERS0:00 Why you can't put your phone down2:00 Welcome to Beyond the Gray3:05 It's not willpower: your phone is a slot machine6:00 Why the end of the page disappeared7:40 What scrolling does to your mood and memory9:35 How your phone affects your marriage and friendships11:55 What you're really hungry for14:40 What scripture says about fasting16:40 The 7-day scroll fast: rules and what to expect19:30 Every fast needs a feast21:35 Simple swaps for morning, afternoon, evening, and bedtime25:20 The SABER method for when the urge hits26:15 Adding friction: grayscale, logouts, and VIP notifications27:35 Scrolling and drinking are cousins28:50 Your next step and a closing prayer RESOURCES MENTIONED📞 Book a call with Kari: https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min📝 Take the Gray Area Audit: https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/🃏 {THE AND} conversation cards by The Skin Deep EPISODES MENTIONED🎧 Episode 15, Our 3-Day Fast🎧 Episode 17, WIGs: Wins, Intentions, and Gratitudes🎧 Episode 27, What You Feed Grows CONNECT WITH KARI🌐 GrayTonic: https://www.graytonic.com Doing the 7-day scroll fast? Drop a comment and let Kari know your start day. If this episode helped you, subscribe and share it with someone who needs it. There is life beyond the gray, and a lot of it is sitting right across from you at the table. #BeyondTheGray #GrayTonic #DoomScrolling #DigitalDetox #PhoneAddiction

  2. Nov 3

    Why You Keep Going Back to Drinking (When You Said You Would Stop) Ep. 38

    You walk in the door after a long day. You're exhausted, frustrated, maybe a little irritated with everyone around you. And before you even realize what's happening, you're reaching for a drink. But what if you don't actually want the drink? What if what you really want is relief? In this episode of *Beyond the Gray*, Kari Schwear explores what's really happening beneath the surface of gray area drinking and why trying to change your drinking habits without understanding what's driving them can keep you stuck in the same cycle. Because alcohol is often less about the drink itself and more about what we're trying to escape, avoid, or quiet down. Whether it's stress, resentment, loneliness, boredom, social pressure, or simply the need to turn your brain off at the end of the day, understanding the trigger is where real change begins. And Kari shares a practical tool you can start using immediately: the 10-minute pause. In this episode, you'll learn: Why relief can become the real reward: How alcohol becomes associated with shutting down stress, discomfort, and difficult emotions. Why willpower isn't always enough: How repeated behaviors become automatic and why you can find yourself drinking even after deciding you wouldn't. The problem with white-knuckling a break: Kari shares a personal story about counting down the days until she could drink again and why delaying a habit isn't the same as changing it. The role of internal triggers: Why it's not always the difficult day, frustrating boss, or relationship conflict that's driving the urge. It's often what those experiences bring up inside you. Why discomfort can lead to drinking: How social pressure, emotional discomfort, and avoiding difficult conversations can influence your decisions. The 10-minute pause: A simple way to interrupt autopilot, give yourself space, and create a different response when the urge to drink hits. What you actually need: How identifying your feelings can help you recognize whether you're looking for rest, connection, space, movement, or something else entirely. The 10-minute pause: Three questions to ask yourself The next time you feel the urge to drink, stop and ask: 1. What am I feeling right now? Name the emotion. Is it stress, resentment, loneliness, boredom, or overwhelm?2. What am I trying to escape? Be honest about what's happening beneath the urge.3. What would actually help me right now?Think beyond the immediate relief and consider what you really need. Then give yourself 10 minutes. Set a timer. Drink some water. Go outside. Take a few deep breaths. Move your body. Give the urge some room to pass before making a decision. Remember: Space creates choice, and choice creates freedom. Your challenge this week The next time you find yourself reaching for a drink, don't immediately tell yourself you shouldn't. Pause. Ask what you're feeling, what you're trying to escape, and what you actually need. You may discover that the drink was never really what you wanted in the first place. Ready to question the drink? If you're ready to understand where alcohol or other habits may be affecting your life, start with the free Gray Area Audit. It takes about 15 minutes and helps you look at the impact on your health, relationships, purpose, and internal alignment. Or book a 45-minute conversation with Kari to talk about what's going on and what you want to change. **Connect with Kari and GrayTonic:** - Book a 45-minute call: https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min- Take the Gray Area Audit: https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/- GrayTonic: https://www.graytonic.com/ - Listen to *Beyond the Gray*: https://beyondthegray.transistor.fm/ - Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@BeyondtheGrayPodcast- Connect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/- Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/ If this episode gave you something to think about, subscribe to *Beyond the Gray* and share it with someone who might need to hear it. Keep questioning what you've always done. Stay curious about what could be different. And remember, you get to decide what comes next.

  3. Oct 27

    What Happens to Your Body When You Stop Drinking? The First 90 Days | Ep. 37

    You don't have to hit rock bottom for alcohol to be affecting your health. You can still run a business, show up for your family, and get plenty done while alcohol impacts your sleep, energy, blood pressure, metabolism, and how you feel each morning. So what actually happens when you take a break from drinking? In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear walks through what your body may experience during the first few days, the first week, the first 30 days, and the first 90 days without alcohol. We'll look at what research tells us, what changes you might notice, and why your experience may look different from someone else's. This isn't about promising a dramatic transformation or giving you another reason to feel bad about your drinking. It's about understanding your body, getting curious about your habits, and discovering what might change when you question the drink. In this episode, you'll learn: The first few days: Why you may not feel better immediately, how your sleep can be affected, and what you might discover about your evening routines and cravings.The first week: Why it's important to pay attention to patterns rather than focusing only on the scale.The first 30 days: What research has found about changes in health measures, including blood pressure, insulin resistance, body weight, and liver-related markers.Days 30–90: Why consistency matters, how new routines can take shape, and what you may learn about alcohol's role in managing stress, frustration, or other emotions.Beyond the physical changes: How drinking habits can affect your Body, Being, Balance, and Business, even when the impact isn't immediately obvious.What to measure during a break: How tracking sleep, energy, mood, cravings, workouts, and evening routines can help you learn more about yourself.Here's something worth remembering: You don't have to build a case against alcohol before you're allowed to question your relationship with it. You don't need a crisis to decide that you want better sleep, more energy, stronger relationships, or a different way to handle the end of a stressful day. Your takeaway this week If you're considering taking a break from drinking, start by getting clear on what you want to learn. Choose two or three things to pay attention to, such as your sleep, energy, mood, or evening routine. Observe what changes without turning every day into a pass-or-fail test. And remember, a break isn't a medical test. If you have health concerns, talk with your healthcare provider. If you drink heavily or may be physically dependent on alcohol, seek medical guidance before stopping suddenly, as withdrawal can be dangerous. The goal isn't simply to make it to day 30 or day 90. It's to understand yourself better and build a life you don't constantly need to escape from. Ready to question the drink? If you're wondering how alcohol or other habits may be affecting your life, let's talk. Book a 45-minute call with Kari to explore where you are and what you want to change. Connect with Kari and GrayTonic: Book a 45-minute call: https://calendly.com/karischwear/45minGrayTonic: https://www.graytonic.com/Take the Gray Area Audit: https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/Listen to Beyond the Gray: https://beyondthegray.transistor.fm/Watch on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@BeyondtheGrayPodcastConnect on LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/Follow on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/If this episode gave you something to think about, follow Beyond the Gray and share it with someone who might need to hear it. Keep questioning what you've always done. Stay curious about what could be different. And remember, you get to decide what comes next. Disclaimer This episode is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice. Individual experiences and health outcomes vary. Consult a qualified healthcare professional about your health and before making changes to alcohol use, especially if physical dependence or withdrawal may be a concern.

  4. Oct 20

    Tired of Working but Can't Retire Yet? What to Do When You're Exhausted and Stuck | Ep.36

    Burned Out but Can't Quit? How to Find Your Energy Again You're good at what you do. You've spent decades building your career, taking care of your employees, serving your customers, and being the person everyone depends on. But lately, you're tired. The passion isn't what it used to be, and you're wondering how much longer you can keep doing this. Maybe retirement is still years away. Maybe you have financial responsibilities, employees counting on you, or a business you can't simply walk away from. So you keep showing up, even when you're running on empty. But what if quitting isn't your only option? In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear talks about what to do when you're burned out, exhausted, and ready for something to change, but you aren't in a position to walk away from your career just yet. You'll learn practical ways to reclaim your energy, rethink your work, build recovery into your life, and start exploring what your next chapter could look like before you're forced to make a change. We'll also talk about why reaching for alcohol or other ways to numb out at the end of the day isn't the same as actually recovering, and why your worth has never been defined by how much you produce. Because you can be responsible without losing yourself in the process. And you can be tired while still having a purpose. In this episode, you'll learn: Why experienced professionals, business owners, and leaders are especially vulnerable to burnout.How to recognize the subtle signs that you're losing your passion and running out of energy.Why putting your life on hold until retirement can make exhaustion even worse.The difference between checking out at the end of the day and genuinely recovering.How alcohol and other quick fixes can become your go-to response to stress.How to set a retirement target or milestone that gives you something to work toward.How to conduct an energy audit to identify what's draining you and what's fueling you.What job crafting is and how small changes to your responsibilities can make work more satisfying.Why learning something new outside of work can help you regain energy and excitement.How to start testing your next chapter before you're ready to leave your current one.Why rest is a discipline, not a reward you have to earn.How faith can help you reconnect with your purpose and remember that your worth is about more than your productivity.Your challenge this week Identify one thing to take away and one thing to add. Take away: What is one responsibility, activity, or unnecessary drain on your energy that you could reduce, delegate, or let go of?Add: What is one thing that would genuinely restore your energy, bring you joy, or help you explore what comes next?You don't have to figure out your entire next chapter today. Start small. Pay attention to what is draining you, make room for what fuels you, and give yourself permission to explore what life could look like beyond your current responsibilities. And remember: Your worth was never your output. Ready to find your way forward? If you're exhausted by the way things are but aren't sure what needs to change, let's talk. We'll look at what's draining you and build a plan that fits your real life. Book a private 45-minute call with Kari:https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min Take the Gray Area Audit:https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/ Connect with Kari and Beyond the Gray GrayTonic: https://www.graytonic.com/ Beyond the Gray Podcast: https://beyondthegray.transistor.fm/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@BeyondtheGrayPodcast LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/ If this episode resonated with you, follow Beyond the Gray, leave a review, and share it with someone who needs the reminder that they don't have to keep running on empty. Topics Burnout, career burnout, workplace stress, executive burnout, business owner burnout, midlife career, retirement planning, work-life balance, decision-making, alcohol and stress, healthy habits, personal growth, faith and purpose, finding meaning after 50. #BeyondTheGray #Burnout #CareerBurnout #PersonalGrowth #GrayAreaDrinking

  5. Oct 13

    How to Stop Lying to Yourself (The Little White Lies That Keep You Stuck) | Ep. 35

    What's the lie you keep telling yourself? "I'll start Monday." "I know I need to." "It's not like I actually did anything." Those little white lies feel harmless, but they add up. Every time you say you'll do something and don't, it dings your identity and you trust yourself a little less. In this episode, Kari gets honest about her own gray areas (yes, including her road rage) and walks through why the small stuff matters more than you think. No finger wagging here, just a real conversation about bringing the truth into the light. In this episode, you'll learn:- The two types of lies we tell, and why both are a way of managing what people see- Why the lies you tell yourself do the most damage to your identity- How "I know" can become a substitute for actually doing the thing- The "who's watching" test for the gray areas in your life- A simple four-step framework to get honest with yourself: Facts, Feelings, Decision, Focus- A one-day Gray Area Audit you can start today Scripture referenced: James 1, Matthew 5, 2 Corinthians 10, Proverbs 4, Philippians 4, Proverbs 28, Psalm 139 Question for the week: If everyone I love could see my week, what would I want to change? CHAPTERS0:00 The little white lies we tell ourselves2:40 Welcome to Beyond the Gray3:25 My confession: road rage and hiding6:40 Lies of commission vs. lies of omission8:55 The lies we tell ourselves10:00 When "I know" replaces doing11:20 The small gray areas that add up12:40 The "who's watching" test13:40 Thoughts, feelings, and which ones get to stay17:25 The four-step framework: Facts, Feelings, Decision, Focus20:55 Your Gray Area Audit22:10 Bringing it into the light23:35 You don't have to do this alone24:30 One practice, a prayer, and your question for the week RESOURCES MENTIONED📞 Book a call with Kari: https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min📝 Take the Gray Area Audit: https://www.graytonic.com/gray-area-audit/🎧 Episode 27, What You Feed Grows: [https://beyondthegray.transistor.fm/episodes/what-you-feed-grows-what-you-starve-dies-ep-27] CONNECT WITH KARI🌐 GrayTonic: https://www.graytonic.com If this episode helped you, subscribe, leave a comment, and share it with someone who needs to hear it. There is life beyond the gray, and it always starts by telling the truth. #BeyondTheGray #GrayTonic #SelfHonesty #MidlifeMen #FaithAndLeadership

  6. Oct 6

    Does Quitting Drinking Fix ED? Sex and Intimacy Without Alcohol After 50 | Ep. 34

    If you've ever reached for a drink before getting intimate because you didn't know how to relax without it, this episode is for you. Things change in the bedroom after 50, and a lot of what men blame on age is actually the alcohol. In this episode of Beyond the Gray, I'm going there. Sex, intimacy, and what really happens when alcohol leaves the bedroom. If you're a man over 55, your baseline risk for erectile dysfunction from aging alone is real, but drinking pushes that number way up. The good news? Most men see real improvement within three months of quitting, and your body heals faster than you think. But this conversation goes deeper than function. I walk through the five fears I see most often with the men and women I coach, from performance anxiety to the hard question of whether your relationship was built on drinking in the first place. Then I share three mindset shifts and five practical tips to help you and your partner build a sober version of intimacy that's more present, more connected, and honestly, so much better. In this episode you'll hear: • What alcohol does to erectile function after 50 and how quickly your body starts to recover once you quit • Why your identity, not just your habit, is what's really tied up in drinking before sex • The five fears of sober intimacy: performance anxiety, vulnerability without the numbing, nakedness, losing your excuse, and a relationship built on alcohol • The question every couple should ask: would you choose each other if alcohol wasn't involved? • A realistic recovery timeline for testosterone and blood flow • How to calm your nervous system before intimacy with box breathing and other simple tools • Why slowing down and talking it through with your partner rebuilds connection • Starting from ground zero and building the new us instead of chasing the old version • What to do if alcohol was the thing holding your relationship together If you've been wondering whether you can still have a great sex life without the drink, I want you to hear this: you can. Presence changes everything, and there is life beyond the gray. ————— KEY TAKEAWAYS "Real intimacy requires presence. And presence requires sobriety." "With alcohol, you're trying to escape into the experience. Without alcohol, you're actually experiencing it." "Communication builds intimacy. Secrets and shame kill it every single time." "Would you choose each other if alcohol wasn't involved?" "The shift here is from 'Can I perform?' to 'Can I truly be present?'" ————— DISCLAIMER This episode is for educational purposes only. Kari Schwear is a coach, not a doctor or sex therapist. Please talk with your doctor, therapist, or a specialist in intimacy about your own situation. If you'd like a referral to someone I trust, send me a private message. ————— RESEARCH SOURCES The Impact of Abstinence from Alcohol on Erectile Dysfunction: A Prospective Follow-up in Patients with Alcohol Use Disorder, The Journal of Sexual Medicine (2022) https://academic.oup.com/jsm/article-abstract/19/4/581/6961281 How Alcohol Can Affect Men's Sexual Function, Cleveland Clinic https://health.clevelandclinic.org/how-does-alcohol-affect-a-man-sexually ————— Want to talk through what's really happening underneath it all? Let's talk. Book a Call with Kari: https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min Visit the Website: https://www.graytonic.com/ Looking for a referral to an intimacy specialist? Email me at hello@graytonic.com and I'll point you in the right direction. ————— CONNECT WITH KARI LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/ ————— TOPICS COVERED sex after quitting drinking, sober intimacy, sober sex, alcohol and erectile dysfunction, does quitting drinking help ED, ED and alcohol, intimacy after 50, sex over 50, marriage after 50, performance anxiety, vulnerability in marriage, alcohol and relationships, couples who drink together, nervous system regulation, box breathing, testosterone and alcohol, gray area drinking, sober curious, alcohol-free, quit drinking, men over 50, midlife leaders, high performers, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic ————— New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next. Know a couple who's been avoiding this conversation? Send this their way. It might be the easiest way to start a hard talk. #GrayAreaDrinking #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #SoberIntimacy #SoberSex #IntimacyAfter50 #MarriageAfter50 #MenOver50 #ErectileDysfunction #MensHealth #SoberCurious #AlcoholFree #QuitDrinking #MidlifeMarriage #SobrietyJourney

  7. Sep 29

    Friendships After 50: Are Your Friends Holding You Back? | Ep. 33

    Nobody pressures you to drink. Nobody says, "Come on, have another one." It's just what your group does. Friday night, drinks. Golf, drinks. Dinner, drinks. And eventually it stops feeling like a choice. It just feels normal. That's not peer pressure. That's influence. And it's shaping who you're becoming whether you realize it or not. In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear tackles one of the most uncomfortable gray areas in midlife: your friendships. Not whether your friends are good or bad people, but what's becoming normal when you're around them. She breaks down the research on social influence and drinking, the Tyler Perry "leaves, branches, and roots" framework, why proximity doesn't equal intimacy, and what happens when you start changing but the people around you don't. This isn't about dumping friends. It's about paying attention to who's shaping the person you're becoming. In this episode you'll hear: • Why "you are the average of the five people you spend the most time with" goes deeper than you think • Research showing people increase their drinking when their partner drinks, without even realizing it • Why nobody has to pressure you when the environment already makes it feel normal • Proverbs 13:20: "Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm" • Why you need people ahead of you, beside you, and behind you • The Tyler Perry "leaves, branches, and roots" framework and why it matters more after 50 • Why you're not outgrowing the person, you're outgrowing the version of yourself that existed around them • Proximity does not equal intimacy: why your coworkers aren't automatically your inner circle • What kind of friend are you? The flip-side question most people never ask • Why Kingdom Impact Network was built out of Kari's own desire for intentional community • The takeaway: maybe you don't need fewer friends, you just need more time with the right ones If you've been feeling like something is shifting in your friendships but you can't name it, this episode will name it for you. And it might change who you spend your time with this week. ————— READY TO TALK? If you're realizing there's a gray area in your life that's not quite working anymore, that's exactly what Kari coaches on. Book a complimentary 45-minute conversation. Book a Call with Kari: https://calendly.com/karischwear/45min Visit the Website: https://www.graytonic.com/ ————— CONNECT WITH KARI LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/karischwear/ Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/beyondthegray.podcast/ ————— SCRIPTURE REFERENCED Proverbs 13:20: "Walk with the wise and become wise, for a companion of fools suffers harm." ————— TOPICS COVERED friendships after 50, who are you spending time with, social influence and drinking, outgrowing friends, leaves branches and roots, Tyler Perry tree analogy, Jim Rohn five people, gray area drinking, proximity vs intimacy, intentional community, changing friendships midlife, walk with the wise, Proverbs 13:20, Kingdom Impact Network, Kari Schwear, Beyond the Gray podcast, GrayTonic, influence and identity, inner circle, men over 50, midlife relationships ————— New episodes drop weekly. Subscribe so you don't miss what's coming next. If this episode made you think of someone, send it to them. Maybe they're a root in your life and they need to know it. Or maybe they're the friend who needs to hear they're not crazy for wanting something different. #CheckYourCircle #FriendshipsAfter50 #LeavesBranchesRoots #BeyondTheGray #KariSchwear #GrayTonic #WalkWithTheWise #OutgrowingFriends #SocialInfluence #GrayAreaDrinking #IntentionalCommunity #InnerCircle #MidlifeChange #Proverbs1320 #HighPerformers #YouAreTheAverage #InfluenceMatters #KingdomImpactNetwork

  8. Sep 22

    Decision Fatigue: Why You’re Exhausted From Making the Same Decision Over and Over | Ep. 32

    Decision Fatigue is EXHAUSTING! Let's talk about it, shall we?  “Am I going to drink tonight?” “Maybe I won’t.” “Well, maybe just one.” “I’ve had a rough day.” “I’ll start tomorrow.” Sound familiar? What if the thing exhausting you isn't the decision itself? What if it's making the same decision over and over again? In this episode of Beyond the Gray, Kari Schwear explores what happens when we get stuck negotiating with ourselves about something we already know needs to change. And while alcohol is one of the clearest examples, this isn't just about drinking. We do this with our health. Our marriages. Our businesses. Our boundaries. Our habits. The conversations we keep avoiding. Sometimes we aren't actually confused about what we want. We know. We just don't want to make the decision because we know the decision means something. Kari shares two conversations that sparked this episode, her own experience of making a decision about drinking and no longer having to revisit it every day, and why there can be tremendous freedom in finally making a decision once. She also breaks down the difference between taking a 30- or 60-day break and using that time to genuinely explore your relationship with alcohol versus simply counting down until you can go back. And then there's the bigger question: What decision are you tired of making? In this episode, you'll hear: Why repeatedly making the same decision can be more exhausting than the decision itselfWhat decision fatigue can look like in real lifeWhy high performers and busy leaders can spend so much mental energy negotiating with themselvesHow alcohol can become an automatic part of your day, until you decide you want something differentThe difference between taking a break and simply counting down until you can drink againKari's personal story of making the decision to stop drinking and what changed when the decision became non-negotiableHow the same pattern shows up in your health, marriage, business, and relationshipsWhy you may be negotiating with an old version of yourselfHow the DECIDE Method can help you move from uncertainty to clarity and actionWhat you might gain when you stop focusing only on what you're giving upThe one question Kari wants you to sit with this weekYour question for this week: What decision am I tired of making? Write it down. Don't solve it. Don't judge it. Just name it. Then ask yourself: What would my life look like if I stopped negotiating with myself about this? You don't have to fix your whole life today. But there may be one decision you've been making over and over again that you're finally ready to make once. Maybe that's where your freedom starts. Ready to talk? If you've named something in this episode and you're not sure what to do with it, that's exactly where coaching can help. Book a private 45-minute conversation with Kari Take the Gray Area Audit Take the Gray Area Audit Connect with Kari GrayTonic Beyond the Gray Podcast Beyond the Gray on YouTube Follow Kari on LinkedIn Follow Beyond the Gray on Instagram New episodes of Beyond the Gray drop weekly. Subscribe or follow so you don't miss the next conversation.

See All (40)

Trailer

5
out of 5
17 Ratings

About

You’ve built something solid. A business. A reputation. A life that looks the part. But somewhere along the way, something started feeling off. Not broken. Not a crisis. Just… not right. Maybe the drinking has become more of a habit than you'd like to admit. Maybe the marriage is stable but not exactly alive. Maybe you're still driven, but the fire feels different. You're functioning at a high level — and wondering why that still isn't enough. Beyond the Gray explores the gray areas of life that successful people rarely talk about — including gray area drinking, midlife identity shifts, relationships, faith, health, and purpose. Host Kari Schwear, founder of GrayTonic, helps business owners, leaders, and high-achievers understand what’s driving their habits, reconnect with what actually matters, and lead their lives with the same intention they bring to their work. This isn’t a sobriety podcast. And there are no labels here. Just clarity, honesty, and conversations most people are too busy performing to have. While many of Kari’s clients are men over 50 navigating these transitions, the ideas explored here resonate with anyone ready to move beyond the gray. New episodes every Tuesday.

Information

  • Creator
    Kari Schwear
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    40
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Kari Schwear

You Might Also Like