Kitchen Table College Chats

Gary Stocker, Marc Deboer

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Education

We all know that choosing a college is one of the biggest investments your family will ever make, but it doesn't have to be the most stressful. Each and every episode, we pull up a virtual chair to cut through the jargon and tackle the real-world questions about admissions and finances and even the financial health and viability of colleges.

2d ago

Should a Parent Tell Their Child 'NO'? on Kitchen Table College Chats

In this episode of Kitchen Table College Chat, Gary Stocker and Marc DeBoer tackle one of the most emotionally challenging questions families face: “Should Parents Ever Tell Their Child No to a College?” The conversation explores what happens when a student falls in love with a college that raises serious concerns for their parents. Through lively role-playing and real-world scenarios, Gary and Marc examine situations involving unaffordable tuition, excessive student debt, declining enrollment, questionable institutional financial health, low graduation rates, campus safety, and athletic opportunities that may never materialize. They debate how much influence parents should have over their child's college decision, particularly when parents are contributing substantial financial resources. While recognizing the importance of allowing young adults to develop independence and make their own choices, both hosts emphasize that parental experience, financial responsibility, and careful research should play important roles in the decision-making process. The discussion ultimately focuses on how families can balance a student's dreams with financial reality and responsible parenting. Gary suggests that rather than simply saying “because I said so,” parents should challenge their children to demonstrate why a particular college is worth the investment, using evidence about affordability, graduation outcomes, academic quality, and institutional stability. Marc recommends that parents and students establish shared selection criteria and work together to identify colleges that satisfy both practical requirements and personal preferences. Both agree that families should establish financial boundaries and expectations before students become emotionally attached to a particular institution. Their central message is that parents don't necessarily need to choose their child's college, but they have every right to establish the financial and practical conditions under which they will support that choice. Sometimes saying no is an act of control, but sometimes it is an act of responsible parenting—and the best way to avoid that conflict is to make college decisions based on evidence rather than emotion.
Nov 5

Rankings Over Students on Kitchen Table College Chats

In this episode of Kitchen Table College Chat, Gary Stocker and Marc DeBoer tackle the question: “What Happens When Colleges Chase Rankings Instead of Students?” They challenge the influence of college rankings on families making one of their most important financial and educational decisions. Gary and Marc argue that rankings often reward institutional reputation and performance measures that have little connection to whether an individual student will graduate on time, find meaningful employment, or avoid excessive debt. They question the value of celebrating small improvements in rankings, criticize the emphasis on six-year rather than four-year graduation rates, and examine how measures such as social mobility and peer reputation can create misleading impressions of institutional quality. They also emphasize that a highly ranked college can still face serious financial challenges or offer weak academic programs in a student's intended major. The conversation encourages parents to look beyond rankings and focus on measurable student outcomes, including four-year graduation rates, financial health, student debt, career earnings, and the number of students successfully completing specific majors. Gary highlights College Viability's comparison tools and introduces the developing My College Decision Team, which will use AI-powered decision support to help families evaluate colleges more objectively. Marc reinforces the importance of asking difficult questions, understanding the actual costs of attendance, and resisting the temptation to equate prestige with educational value. Their central message is that families should not allow someone else's ranking formula to determine their child's future. Instead, they should approach college selection with the same careful research, financial scrutiny, and independent judgment they would apply to any other major investment—because the best college isn't necessarily the one with the highest ranking, but the one most likely to help their child graduate, succeed, and begin adult life without an overwhelming financial burden.
Oct 27

Is College Becoming Too Comfortable on Kitchen Table College Chats

In this episode of Kitchen Table College Chat, Gary Stocker and Marc DeBoer tackle the provocative question: “Is College Becoming Too Comfortable?” They explore whether colleges have become so focused on student satisfaction, attractive amenities, and retention that they risk sacrificing academic rigor, personal responsibility, and preparation for the real world. The conversation examines the financial pressures that may encourage colleges to keep students happy rather than challenge them academically, including the potential for relaxed deadlines, easier grading, and reduced expectations. Gary and Marc also question whether campus tours and college marketing place too much emphasis on social experiences, beautiful facilities, and a sense of belonging while giving insufficient attention to academic outcomes, four-year graduation rates, and career preparation. Their discussion extends to artificial intelligence, debating how colleges can embrace modern workplace technology without allowing students to substitute AI-generated work for genuine learning and critical thinking. The discussion also raises a larger concern about whether higher education is producing more educated graduates or simply more credentialed graduates. Gary questions whether students are receiving sufficient intellectual challenges to justify the substantial financial investment families make in a college education, while Marc examines the growing pressure to pursue additional degrees and credentials that may not translate into better employment opportunities. Both agree that colleges should provide supportive environments without shielding students from the expectations, responsibilities, and occasional discomfort of adult life. They challenge parents to reconsider what they should expect from a college education: not simply a happy student, an impressive campus experience, or a diploma, but a graduate equipped with the knowledge, independence, discipline, and critical-thinking skills necessary to succeed beyond college. Their central message is that college should prepare students for a world that will not always accommodate them—not create an environment where they never have to experience discomfort.
Oct 27

The Freshmen Year Illusion on Kitchen Table College Chats

In this episode of Kitchen Table College Chat, Gary Stocker and Marc DeBoer explore “The Freshman Year Illusion,” examining how colleges devote significant resources to creating an attractive freshman experience while families often overlook what happens during the sophomore, junior, and senior years. From impressive campus tours and freshman orientation programs to extensive first-year academic support, colleges work hard to attract and retain new students. However, Gary and Marc challenge families to look beyond that carefully presented first-year experience and investigate whether colleges can deliver the courses, faculty, academic advising, and resources students will need throughout their education. They emphasize the importance of examining upper-level course availability, the number of students completing specific majors, and whether a college can realistically support graduation in four years. Their message is clear: families aren't simply purchasing a freshman experience—they're investing in the entire journey toward graduation. The conversation also addresses the financial realities that can emerge after freshman year, including annual tuition increases, rising housing and meal costs, additional academic expenses, and scholarships that may not keep pace with those increases. Gary encourages families to evaluate the total cost of attendance through graduation rather than focusing exclusively on the first-year financial aid offer. Marc recommends asking colleges for a detailed four-year academic plan and speaking directly with current juniors and seniors to learn what the experience is really like beyond freshman year. Both hosts remind parents that they have considerable influence in the college selection process and should not hesitate to ask difficult questions about academic programs, financial stability, and student outcomes. Their central takeaway: Don't choose a college based on how well it welcomes freshmen. Choose one based on how successfully it supports students through graduation and prepares them for what comes next
Oct 27

The Transfer Student Nobody Planned to be on Kitchen Table College Chats

In this episode of Kitchen Table College Chat, Gary Stocker and Marc DeBoer explore “The Transfer Student Nobody Planned to Be,” examining why students unexpectedly leave their original colleges and the financial and academic consequences that follow. They identify several reasons students transfer, including changing academic interests, homesickness, athletic disappointments, poor institutional fit, and colleges that eliminate majors, lose faculty, reduce course availability, or experience financial difficulties. The conversation emphasizes that transferring is not necessarily a failure, but it can become an expensive and disruptive experience. Gary highlights three important measures families should investigate before enrolling: four-year graduation rates, enrollment trends, and institutional endowment. Both hosts encourage families to look beyond campus appearances and admissions promises to determine whether a college can realistically deliver the education students expect over four years. The discussion also examines the hidden costs of transferring, particularly credits that don't transfer, additional semesters of tuition, increased student debt, and lost earnings from delayed graduation. Gary illustrates how even one additional year could represent $50,000 in combined educational expenses and forgone income. Marc offers practical insights into evaluating transfer credits and emphasizes the importance of asking difficult questions during campus visits. The hosts also explore the risks of choosing colleges primarily for athletics, including coaching changes, injuries, reduced playing time, and eliminated sports programs. Their central message is that families should evaluate colleges not simply for their appeal today, but for their ability to support students all the way through graduation. They encourage parents to investigate the strength of academic majors, institutional financial stability, and student outcomes before committing to a college—because the best way to avoid becoming an unexpected transfer student is to ask better questions before enrolling.
Sep 27

Most expensive college mistake parents can make on The Kitchen Table College Chat

In this episode of Kitchen Table College Chat, Gary Stocker and Marc DeBoer tackle what they describe as the most expensive college mistake parents can make: falling in love with a college before doing their homework. They discuss how beautiful campuses, impressive facilities, emotional campus visits, prestigious names, and large scholarship offers can influence families before they have examined the underlying numbers. Stocker argues that families should investigate first and fall in love later, while DeBoer provides the counterpoint that campus environment, safety, networking, and the overall student experience have legitimate value. Together, they challenge families to distinguish between simply asking, “Can we afford this college?” and the much more important question, “Is this college worth what we are going to pay?” Pasted text Pasted text. The conversation also examines several costly mistakes that can follow from an emotional college decision, including treating tuition discounts as special scholarships, focusing more on getting admitted than graduating in four years, and overlooking a college’s financial health. Stocker and DeBoer encourage families to strip away the college names and objectively compare their finalists using net price, four-year graduation and retention rates, projected student debt, career outcomes, strength of the intended major, and institutional financial health. Their central message is simple: families should ask the difficult questions before enrollment rather than spending four years and tens of thousands of dollars discovering the questions they should have asked in the first place.
Sep 13

Private College Counselor and School Match 4U founder Mark Stucker joins us for Kitchen Table College Chats

In this episode of Kitchen Table College Chat, special guest Mark Stucker, founder of School Match 4 U, joins Marc and me for a wide-ranging conversation about how families can make better-informed college decisions. We discuss whether the admissions process is actually identifying students who will succeed or simply encouraging families to build increasingly polished applications. Mark explains the value of holistic admissions while acknowledging that competitive admissions can become “gamified,” particularly for well-resourced families. We also examine the demographic and financial pressures facing colleges, including declining numbers of traditional-age students, institutions admitting students partly to meet revenue needs, confusion surrounding sticker price versus actual net price, and the growing importance of considering a college’s financial health as part of the selection process. Mark strongly agrees that financial viability should now be part of the due diligence performed by families and college counselors. We also explore what happens after a student enrolls, including the transition from admissions to student support, retention and graduation rates, and the importance of understanding the students a college serves before judging its outcomes. Our conversation turns to new approaches to college pricing that give families greater certainty about what they will actually pay, as well as how artificial intelligence is changing applications, college research and questions about future careers. While no one can confidently predict which occupations AI will disrupt, Mark emphasizes the enduring importance of communication, critical thinking, reasoning and collaboration. The biggest takeaway from the conversation is that families should not make the college decision based simply on prestige, selectivity, marketing or a familiar name. They should investigate financial stability, affordability, academic and career fit, graduation prospects and long-term value—and use all the independent information available to make the most informed decision possible.
Sep 7

Your child isn't just buying a 4-year degree . . . on Kitchen Table College Chats

The Kitchen Table College Chat episode explores the idea that families are not simply buying a college degree—they are investing four critical years of a young person’s life. Gary Stocker and Marc DeBoer discuss how the value of college extends beyond academics to include personal growth, relationships, networking, leadership opportunities, and career preparation. But they argue that families need to determine whether those experiences justify the price and potential debt. Graduation rates are especially important because taking five or six years to earn a degree adds tuition costs while delaying entry into the workforce. Gary emphasizes that a college’s financial health also matters because financially stronger institutions are generally better positioned to maintain programs, services, faculty, and the experiences students expect throughout their enrollment. The conversation also challenges families to look beyond superficial campus-tour questions and investigate whether a college can actually deliver what it promises. Students should examine four-year graduation rates, the number of students completing their intended major, the likelihood that the program will remain available, career outcomes, and the institution’s overall financial stability. A low-completion major can be particularly risky at a time when financially pressured colleges are eliminating programs. Ultimately, Gary argues that the most valuable resource a family puts into college isn't simply money—it is time. Students only get one opportunity to be 18, 19, 20, and 21 years old, so the college decision should focus on whether the institution can make those four years academically, professionally, financially, and personally worthwhile. As he puts it, families can borrow money for college, but they “can’t borrow another four years” of their child’s life.

We all know that choosing a college is one of the biggest investments your family will ever make, but it doesn't have to be the most stressful. Each and every episode, we pull up a virtual chair to cut through the jargon and tackle the real-world questions about admissions and finances and even the financial health and viability of colleges.

Creator

Gary Stocker, Marc Deboer
Years Active

2026
Episodes

29
Rating

Clean
Copyright

© College Viability, LLC 2026
Show Website

Kitchen Table College Chats