My Son Is Having A Hard Time | Meltdowns, Separation Anxiety, Aggression, Regulate Emotions, Defiant, Sensory Issues

Cynthia Fehr - Parent Coach | Behavior Specialist
  • 5.0 (10)
  • Parenting
  • Updated Weekly

Does your child meltdown for hours at a time? Are they unable to move from one thing to another without aggressive behavior? You’ve missed appointments, he refuses to go to school, and very few people understand that a heavy hand is not the answer.  You even question your own ability to help him. It’s so good to have you here! This podcast will give you hope that you aren't failing your child, relieve tension from the aggressive meltdowns, and process through stress and anxiety so you and your child can thrive." Hey, I'm Cynthia. A wife and boy mom.  For over a decade, we lived in the trenches of extreme meltdowns and collapse. The smallest thing could trigger aggression. Coming out of a monster-sized meltdown left me feeling like I got run over by a semi...it spiralled out of control pretty fast! Not only did I want to help my son, but I was sick and tired of ending up in a big heap myself…saying and doing things I wish I hadn’t. It was like I was on an island where no one understood the toll the meltdowns had on our family. I finally learned how to stay confident in the middle of the aggressive behaviors. I discovered co-regulation and realized I could actually help my son return to calm. I’ve pulled together the best strategies and insights from more than a decade of feeling completely clueless about how to help him settle. Instead of letting his behaviors run our home, I carved out a path from rage, violence, and chaos into peace, hope, and real learning. And now I’m ready to share that path with you. If you’re ready to reduce the meltdowns and aggressive behavior and finally see that what you are doing is actually helping it’s time to climb out from under the covers, there’s a bright day ahead!

  1. 4d ago

    17| Does Everyone Think You're Too Protective? 3 Boundaries To Help Your Son Regulate

    Have you ever wondered whether you're protecting your child or accommodating them too much? In this episode, I'm sharing a childhood memory that completely changed how I think about parenting a son with sensory struggles. Long before I became a mom, I watched a family member fiercely protect what mattered most to her son. At the time, it looked like a few simple household rules. Looking back now, I can see it was something much deeper. It was advocacy. It was respect. And it was a powerful reminder that helping our children feel safe, understood, and regulated often begins with the boundaries we are willing to hold even when it comes to family members. In this episode we'll talk about: Why highly valuing what matters to your child builds security and trust • The importance of respecting sensory needs, personal space, and routines • How giving your child more time can reduce overwhelm and support emotional regulation • What advocacy can look like in everyday family life If you're raising a son with autism, sensory processing needs, chronic meltdowns that often turn aggressive and you sometimes wonder whether you're too easy on him, this episode offers a different perspective—one rooted in understanding, connection, and trust. C Website - > www.cynthiafehr.com   If you’re listening to this and thinking, “I need some support but I don’t even know where to begin anymore…” I want you to know you don’t have to carry this alone. I have a few spaces opening up for Meltdown Support—1-on-1 sessions with me for moms who are overwhelmed by aggressive meltdowns, shutdowns, sensory struggles, and the constant emotional weight of it all. Together, we’ll slow things down, make sense of what’s happening underneath the behaviours, and help you feel more calm, and less overwhelmed by the daily outbursts. You can email me at info@cynthiafehr.com to join the waitlist today.

    7 min

  2. May 28

    16| Exhausted By Daily Outbursts? 7 Practical Solutions For Boys With Sensory Struggles Or Persistent Meltdowns

    Are aggressive meltdowns, screaming, scratching, spitting, sensory struggles, or daily routine battles leaving you exhausted before noon? In today’s episode, I’m sharing the 7 essential things that helped reduce overwhelm and create smoother routines for our son. After years of parenting through emotional outbursts, sensory overload, rigidity, and chronic stress, my husband and I slowly discovered something life-changing: Routine isn’t a formula. It’s about helping an overwhelmed nervous system feel safe. This can change for your son from one day to the next. If your son struggles with transitions, emotional regulation, separation anxiety, inflexibility, or aggressive meltdowns at home, this episode will help you look at behavior through a completely different lens. Inside this episode: How “invisible overwhelm” builds throughout the day 7 essential routine supports that reduced stress in our home Why small changes can create big emotional shifts Encouragement for exhausted stay-at-home moms navigating daily meltdowns Whether you’re parenting a highly sensitive child, autistic child, or son with sensory struggles and emotional outbursts, this episode will remind you that smoother days often begin with reducing overwhelm — not heavy handed parenting that others might suggest.   If you’re listening to this and thinking, “I don’t even know where to begin anymore…” I want you to know you don’t have to carry this alone. I have a few spaces opening up for Meltdown Support—1-on-1 sessions with me for moms who are overwhelmed by aggressive meltdowns, shutdowns, sensory struggles, and the constant emotional weight of it all. Together, we’ll slow things down, make sense of what’s happening underneath the behaviours, and help you feel more calm, and less overwhelmed by the daily outbursts. You can email me at info@cynthiafehr.com to join the waitlist today.   Website -> www.cynthiafehr.com Contact - > info@cynthiafehr.com

    10 min

  3. May 21

    15| Dreading Vacation Meltdowns? The Hidden Reason Family Vacations Leave You Exhausted, Mama

    Family vacations are supposed to feel fun, exciting, and full of memories. But when your son struggles with sensory overwhelm, shutdowns, meltdowns, or emotional regulation…they can quickly become exhausting, isolating, and heartbreaking instead. In this episode, I’m sharing the story of a family vacation that looked beautiful from the outside—but underneath it all, my youngest son was struggling in ways no one else could fully see. In this episode we talk about: sensory issues and family vacations emotional shutdowns in boys the invisible emotional weight moms carry what your son might say to you about the hardest days I also walk you through a simple reflection exercise that can help you process painful parenting memories so healing and breakthrough can begin. If you’ve ever felt heartbroken watching your son struggle during vacations, outings, public places, or family events…this episode is for you.   *To reserve your spot for a 1:1 Meltdown Support Session send me an email to info@cynthiafehr.com Website -> www.cynthiafehr.com

    8 min

  4. May 14

    14| Everyone Calls It The 'Terrible Twos'...But What If There's More Behind Your Son's Aggressive Behavior?

    Everyone had an explanation for our son’s behaviors. “It’s just the terrible twos.” “He needs firmer discipline.” “He’ll grow out of it.” “Just leave him there.” But deep down, we knew something different was going on. In this episode, Cynthia sits down again with her husband Wes for a deeply personal conversation about parenting stereotypes, explosive behaviors, sensory struggles, selective mutism, and the isolation that can come when your child doesn’t fit the “typical” mold. Together, they share how traditional parenting advice and heavy-handed approaches only created more disconnection in their home — and how learning to become curious about what was happening underneath their son’s behaviors changed the path they were on. If you are raising a son with meltdowns, aggression, shutdowns, hitting, spitting, sensory sensitivities, separation struggles, or emotional eruptions that feel far beyond what others understand, this conversation will remind you that you are not imagining it… and you are not alone. Need more support? Here are some ways you can reach me! Facebook Community - > Join Us!  Contact - > info@cynthiafehr.com Website -> www.cynthiafehr.com

    17 min

  5. May 7

    13| 10 Things You Miss Out On When Parenting A Son With Explosive Or Inflexible Behavior

    I want you to imagine we’re sitting across from each other. You’ve got a warm cup of coffee in your hands, and I gently ask you: “What are some things you miss out on because of your son’s behavior?”   And you pause. Because it’s not just one thing. It’s the refusal to go places. The canceled plans. The way your world can start to feel smaller without you even realizing it.   And underneath all of that… you just want connection with your son. But you’re not sure how to get there.   In this episode, I’m walking through 10 real things moms often miss out on when they’re parenting a son with explosive or inflexible behavior. Things like: Planned activities that feel impossible Appointments that get missed Not being able to get a simple family photo Losing any sense of spontaneity The impact on your work Less time with your other children No time for yourself Exercise falling off completely Avoiding restaurants or public places Missing out on church or community If your life has started to revolve around your son’s behavior… and you’re feeling more isolated than you ever expected… this episode will help you feel a little less alone in that. P.S. I’m starting to open up space to support moms one-on-one with exactly this, so if that’s something you’re needing, you can keep an eye out for more on that soon!   Facebook Community - > Join Here!  Contact - > info@cynthiafehr.com Website -> www.cynthiafehr.com

    25 min

  6. Apr 30

    12| Do Public Places Feel Impossible? Parenting A Son With Separation Anxiety

    Are you feeling stuck trying to navigate your son's meltdowns, aggression, school refusal, or separation anxiety? When traditional approaches to school, church, restaurants, or everyday life just aren't working, it can leave you overwhelmed, isolated, and wondering what to do next. In this episode, I'm sharing our family's journey of learning to let go of what wasn't serving us and create a life that truly supported our son's needs. From sensory struggles and public meltdowns to refusing school, church, and other everyday experiences, you'll hear how we found a different way forward—one that brought more peace, connection, and confidence to our family. When you’re ready, I'm right here to help you along the way.  Reach out -> info@cynthiafehr.com Join our community -> https://www.facebook.com/groups/1911906866123287 Website -> www.cynthiafehr.com

    7 min

  7. Apr 23

    11| When Your Son Hits Or Spits...What Happens On The Inside Of You As A Mom?

    If you’re parenting meltdowns, aggression, hitting, or spitting… the hardest part isn’t always what’s happening on the outside. You’re also trying to hold yourself together at the same time. And that part doesn’t get talked about enough.   The rage that builds. The shame that follows. The guilt of feeling like you should be able to help him—but can’t. And the weight of wondering what other people are thinking when it all unfolds in public. In this episode, I’m sharing a real moment from our family—one that happened in a restaurant, where everything fell apart fast. The kind of moment that leaves you shaken, exposed, and questioning everything. But also… a moment that reminded me of something every mom in this position needs to hear. If you’re a stay-at-home mom (or any mom) raising a son with meltdowns, aggression, hitting, or spitting… this episode is for you. We’re talking about: What’s really going on inside you during your son’s meltdowns The emotional toll of parenting a child with explosive or aggressive behavior Why you feel rage, shame, and guilt—and what to do with those feelings 3 things you can hold onto when you feel like you’re at your breaking point A simple but powerful truth that can ground you in the hardest moments You are not alone in this. And even in the middle of the chaos… there is still hope for you and your son.   Stay in touch with me: Facebook Community: Join Here  Contact - > info@cynthiafehr.com Website -> www.cynthiafehr.com

    9 min

  8. Apr 16

    10| Your Son's Aggressive Meltdowns At Home? 3 Ways to Reduce Them When You Feel Isolated

    Meltdowns are not all the same—and if you’re a stay-at-home mom raising a son with aggressive meltdowns, you already know that. This isn’t about the quick, passing tantrums other parents talk about. This is about the long, intense, unpredictable outbursts that can leave you feeling overwhelmed, isolated, and completely alone in your own home. In this episode, I’m sharing a real look at what aggressive meltdowns have looked like in our home—and 3 simple, practical ways to help reduce the intensity when you’re the one dealing with it day in and day out. These are strategies I’ve used over decades of parenting sons with multiple diagnoses. They’re simple, but they matter—and they can make your days feel just a little more manageable. If you’ve ever felt dismissed, misunderstood, or like no one truly gets what you’re carrying as a mom…this episode is for you. Inside this episode: What aggressive meltdowns can actually look like at home 3 ways to reduce meltdowns using everyday spaces in your home How to support your son’s need for regulation in simple, doable ways Courageous together, Cynthia Stay in touch here:  Facebook Community - > Join Here A little about us - > Read more  Contact - > info@cynthiafehr.com Website - > www.cynthiafehr.com

    7 min
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About

Does your child meltdown for hours at a time? Are they unable to move from one thing to another without aggressive behavior? You’ve missed appointments, he refuses to go to school, and very few people understand that a heavy hand is not the answer.  You even question your own ability to help him. It’s so good to have you here! This podcast will give you hope that you aren't failing your child, relieve tension from the aggressive meltdowns, and process through stress and anxiety so you and your child can thrive." Hey, I'm Cynthia. A wife and boy mom.  For over a decade, we lived in the trenches of extreme meltdowns and collapse. The smallest thing could trigger aggression. Coming out of a monster-sized meltdown left me feeling like I got run over by a semi...it spiralled out of control pretty fast! Not only did I want to help my son, but I was sick and tired of ending up in a big heap myself…saying and doing things I wish I hadn’t. It was like I was on an island where no one understood the toll the meltdowns had on our family. I finally learned how to stay confident in the middle of the aggressive behaviors. I discovered co-regulation and realized I could actually help my son return to calm. I’ve pulled together the best strategies and insights from more than a decade of feeling completely clueless about how to help him settle. Instead of letting his behaviors run our home, I carved out a path from rage, violence, and chaos into peace, hope, and real learning. And now I’m ready to share that path with you. If you’re ready to reduce the meltdowns and aggressive behavior and finally see that what you are doing is actually helping it’s time to climb out from under the covers, there’s a bright day ahead!

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