The SOBER Method

Massimo Rigotti
  • 5.0 (4)
  • Self-Improvement

Sobriety and addiction recovery for high-achieving professionals. Learn how to quit drinking, beat burnout, and build an alcohol-free life without losing your edge or risking your career. The SOBER Method is a weekly podcast for high-achieving professionals who quietly rely on alcohol, drugs, or other dependencies to cope with stress, pressure, and burnout, and who want a proven path to quit for good without losing their edge. Host Massimo Rigotti is 10 years sober and creator of the SOBER Method, a five-step framework: Stoic, Observe, Behavior, Execute, Restore. He works privately with lawyers, doctors, pharmacists, executives, veterans, and entrepreneurs. Each week: real coaching sessions and interviews with high performers who quit drinking and built alcohol-free lives. If you've ever searched "how to quit drinking without AA or rehab," wondered whether you're a high-functioning alcoholic or a gray area drinker, or asked how to stay sober while running a demanding career, this show was made for you. Topics: how to stop drinking alcohol, high-functioning alcoholism, gray area drinking, sober curious living, relapse prevention, managing stress and burnout without substances, socializing and networking alcohol-free, Stoicism for addiction recovery, and rebuilding confidence after addiction. New episodes weekly. Every episode stands alone. Press play on any one. If you're a professional who drinks to cope, or you love someone who does, start here.

  1. 1d ago

    Why Insight Alone Never Stops a Craving

    You already know why you drink, and it has not stopped you. Leanna Lapidus, a clinical hypnotherapist who spent a decade at Passages Malibu, joins Massimo Rigotti to explain why a craving is a conditioned program installed by repetition and feeling, why the discipline that built a career cannot out-argue it, how relapse starts in thought and emotion long before the glass, and what returns when the program finally changes. Key TakeawaysInsight is not the problem. A craving is a conditioned response the subconscious learned through repetition.The program is installed by feeling. The first drink quiets the overthinking mind, and the cycle becomes a chase for that first warmth and comfort until life begins to hurt.The discipline that wins at work does not reach the emotional part that addiction speaks to. High achievers win this battle when they use the same goal process with a why big enough to overpower the desire to use.Hypnotherapy is guided, not controlled. She quiets the mind, finds the root, such as insecurity, unworthiness, or imposter syndrome, and the client chooses the new response, visualizes it, and feels it so the change is real.Relapse happens in thought and emotion first. One invited thought, like nobody will know, links to a bigger story, and a deal that falls through or a hard night at home makes it louder. Catch the thought, call it a lie and reach for your why.Massimo's SOBER move this week is the rehearsal. Ten minutes before your most predictable window, close your eyes and rehearse the next 20 minutes in first person and real time, including the moment you want the drink and you not taking it. Then live it, write one line about what your body did and what you felt, and repeat for seven days.Timestamps00:00 Why insight alone never stops a craving 00:35 How a craving becomes a conditioned program 01:49 Why people keep chasing the first feeling 03:39 Why the discipline that wins at work loses here 05:15 How a big enough why overpowers the desire to use 06:32 What actually happens in a hypnotherapy session 08:48 When it is time for a doctor or a treatment center 10:00 Why relapse happens before you pick up the glass 11:45 How one unchallenged thought builds the story that says yes 13:04 What Passages Malibu taught her about readiness 15:05 How growing up around addiction built her compassion 16:47 What choice means when you feel you have none 18:40 Why the SOBER Method stalls at behavior 19:59 What comes back first when the program changes 20:43 How to run this week's rehearsal 21:35 What she would tell her younger self Resources🎁 Free gift! The exact 5 tools I use with clients to name what is really driving the urge to numb, before it takes over. Grab them free: https://sobermethod.com/5tools 📘 Digital S.O.B.E.R. Method, available now: https://amazon.com/dp/B0H93ZTVS9 Call to ActionIf you want lasting sobriety without walking into a room that could follow the job or the license, start at https://sobermethod.com. About the GuestLeanna Lapidus, C.Ht., is a Los Angeles clinical hypnotherapist and transformational coach who has spent more than 15 years helping people heal anxiety, trauma, and addiction at the root, including a decade as a clinical hypnotherapist at Passages Malibu. Trained at the Hypnosis Motivation Institute, she grew up in a family affected by addiction and is the author of You Have a Choice: The Proven 5 Step Method to End Suffering and Start Living. She joins this episode to explain why a craving is a program the conscious mind cannot out-argue, and how that program actually gets changed. Start at https://www.leannalapidus.com instagram.com/@leanna_lapidus Your Future is SOBER™

    Why Insight Alone Never Stops a Craving

  2. Oct 14

    How a Hollywood Agent's Double Life Finally Collapsed

    He was closing real deals the whole time, so nobody needed to ask what else was going on. Nick Mechanic, a former Hollywood agent, joins Massimo Rigotti to tell the story of a double life that ran on commission checks, cocaine, and methamphetamine, the tells that gave him away long before the law did, the Beverly Hills arrest that did not stop him, and the meetings, sponsor, and purpose that keep him sober today. Key TakeawaysPerforming well at work can hide addiction from everyone, including you. Nick kept his job because he was really good at what he did, even while he was hungover and missing a lot of work, and he admits he thought he was bigger than he was.The body tells on you before you confess. A whistle through the nose, sweating through staff meetings, and a clenched jaw made his use obvious to the people around him.An arrest is not always the bottom. Nick kept living that insanity for three more years after the police searched his house, because, as he says, "Consequences don't matter to addicts and alcoholics."Help landed when it came from people who had lived it. A psychologist who did not share his experience could not reach him, so he needed like minded people to get a hold of his disease.Recovery means refusing to romance the past. Nick says, "This is a thinking disease," and he no longer prays to get his old life back.Daily accountability keeps the mindset in check.Massimo's Observe move this week: "I want you to keep observing and journaling your own behaviors daily."Timestamps00:00 What shows up before a double life collapses 00:37 Why closing real deals hid the functioning addict 02:30 How the tells gave him away on set and in meetings 04:28 Why help only worked from people who had lived it 05:22 What the agency years rewarded and why it never felt like enough 07:17 How using turned into dealing when cash flow got tight 08:27 Why a Beverly Hills arrest did not stop the insanity 12:49 How a clean record until 40 shaped his case 16:21 Why he refuses to romance the past 17:36 How the excuses piled up when he was calling in sick 19:08 How purpose and humility keep the addictive mindset in check 21:33 Why consequences do not matter to addicts and alcoholics 22:43 How friends, meetings, and Sunday messages keep him accountable 24:32 What gets Nick out of bed in the morning Resources🎁 Free gift! The exact 5 tools I use with clients to name what is really driving the urge to numb, before it takes over. Grab them free: https://sobermethod.com/5tools📘 Digital SOBER Method, available now: https://amazon.com/dp/B0H93ZTVS9Call to ActionIf you want lasting sobriety without walking into a room that could follow the job or the license, start at https://sobermethod.com. About the GuestNick Mechanic is a former Hollywood agent who made movie and TV deals for actors, writers, directors, and producers before addiction, drug dealing, and arrest took that life apart. Today he is sober, active in a 12 step program, still selling TV series, and the host of The Mechanic with Alan Katz, as well as an executive producer of John Kiriakou's Dead Drop. He joins this episode to name the hidden tells of a functioning addict and what finally changed. Listen to The Mechanic at https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/the-mechanic/id1890537332 and Dead Drop at https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/john-kiriakous-dead-drop/id1844905790 Your Future is SOBER™

    How a Hollywood Agent's Double Life Finally Collapsed

  3. Oct 10

    Why Your Parents Still Love You After Addiction

    A father who solves problems for a living learns that love cannot control his son's addiction. On this World Mental Health Day 2026, a bonus episode of the SOBER Method Podcast Perspectives series, Katie Rizzo returns, and for the first time a guest is not alone. Her husband, Nick Rizzo, shares the father's side of losing their oldest son, Nicholas, to an accidental overdose. Nick talks about the anxious, sensitive, soccer-loving boy he raised, the boundaries he set, the night he called the police, and the regret that still visits him. The turn comes when he admits he can hold two truths at once: that it felt like his job to protect his son, and that he never could have controlled the addiction. He describes going back to work two weeks later and telling no one, learning guitar to honor Nicholas, and why staying connected in Al-Anon and grief groups helped more than ruminating alone. If you are still using and feel your parents' anger, Nick has a message for you: they still love you, and nothing you did changed that. Chapters 00:00 Meeting Nicholas Through His Dad's Eyes 04:16 Why Love and Anger Lived Side by Side 09:38 Why a Fixer Couldn't Outwork Addiction 14:27 How Al-Anon Helped Save Their Marriage 22:11 Your Parents Still Love You 30:35 Why Men Grieve in Silence at Work 35:46 How a Guitar Became a Way to Honor Him 42:20 One True Sentence to Carry This Month Where to Find Katie Rizzo https://katierizzo.comTo order None of Them Are You, a collection of poetry from the first year of grief: Barnes and Noble: www.barnesandnoble.com Amazon: www.amazon.comTo purchase The Trimesters of Grief: Barnes and Noble: www.barnesandnoble.com Amazon: www.amazon.com Katie's first episode S1E10, He Wasn't an Addict...He Was My Son: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=A_cX_TtBCTMWork with Massimo: https://sobermethod.com Your future is SOBER™

    Why Your Parents Still Love You After Addiction

  4. Oct 7

    How Success Makes Addiction Easier to Hide

    Everyone still thinks you are fine, and that is the most dangerous part. Mark G. Astor, Esq., joins Massimo Rigotti to name the exact story high-achieving professionals tell themselves to hide addiction in plain sight, why success keeps validating that story, where the first crack usually shows, and how Florida's Baker Act (and every state's version of it) can save a life or trap someone when there is no oversight. This is the Observe work of the S.O.B.E.R. Method, for people who want sobriety and cannot walk into a public room to admit it. Key Takeaways Professionals are trained as problem solvers, so ego plus that training keeps them from saying I have a problem and I need help, even while the one problem they cannot solve is the one affecting them personally.Success makes hiding easier. Money, clients, the house, and the car validate the story that nothing needs fixing, so the pour or the pattern can keep going longer.The first crack for licensed professionals often looks like a DUI, a Baker Act, a missed filing deadline, unanswered clients, or someone saying you sounded intoxicated. Outward success can still hide a private crisis.Chasing the win and burnout are linked to substance use. Under the facade, the same go-go-go Type A drive that built the career can metastasize until everything explodes.Every state has a temporary custody statute like Florida's Baker Act. Done right, it can save a life.Families get denial wrong twice. They hope the loved one will grow out of it, and they wait until treatment centers, arrests, and near misses have already piled up. While the loved one is in treatment, the family needs a program too.Massimo's Observe move this week: pick one place where you keep telling yourself I've got this under control, and you have not tested that story in a while.Timestamps 00:00 Why everyone still thinking you are fine is the danger 00:27 How professionals hide the one problem they cannot solve 01:37 Why success validates the story that nothing needs fixing 02:17 How the first crack shows when clients and courts notice 03:54 Why chasing the win quietly destroys the licensed professional 05:41 How the Baker Act works and why every state has a version 07:20 Why privatized detention with no oversight gets abused 08:56 How a voluntary check-in can become a lockup 10:30 Why Mark built a practice that saves families after his own crisis 18:44 How family cases shifted from substance use to mental health 23:13 Why families get denial wrong when the loved one still performs 26:08 How denial finally cracks for high achievers 27:16 How to run this week's Observe move Resources 🎁 Free gift! The exact 5 tools I use with clients to name what is really driving the urge to numb, before it takes over. Grab them free: https://sobermethod.com/5toolsCall to Action If you want lasting sobriety without walking into a room that could follow the job or the license, start at https://sobermethod.com/services. About the Guest Mark G. Astor, Esq., is a Florida attorney whose practice centers on behavioral health law for families, including Baker Act and Marchman Act work, guardianship, and getting loved ones out of detention that has gone sideways. He joins this episode to name how high-achieving professionals hide addiction behind success, and what finally cracks the story. Find him at https://mentalhealthaddictionlawfirm.com Your Future is SOBER™

    How Success Makes Addiction Easier to Hide

  5. Sep 30

    Why Hot Thoughts Hit Before the Craving Does

    Never the drink first. Always one hot thought you did not catch. Bernard Glos, Ph.D., joins Massimo Rigotti to walk through AFROG (Alive, Feel better, Real, Others, Goals), the five question test from Maxie Maultsby's rational behavior therapy that catches a hot thought before the craving wins, and why addiction-making family rules quietly load the mind for a snap. This is the Observe work of the S.O.B.E.R. Method, for people who want sobriety and cannot walk into a public room to admit it. Key TakeawaysAFROG is Alive, Feel better, Real, Others, and Goals. Run the five questions on your self-talk so thoughts lead to chosen behavior instead of a snap.A hot thought drives immediate reactive behavior. A less hot thought may still be unhelpful, but it will not send you back to the drink or the fight in that moment.Life splits into two piles: the huge pile you do not control and the smaller pile you do. Messing around in the big pile makes you miserable. Stop, look, and listen, then choose.Addiction-making families teach be perfect, play safe, do not be selfish, stick to the script, and do not show your feelings. Those rules move you away from reality and load hot thoughts later.Faye's formula is expectations minus reality equals pain. The same core beliefs that drive kids in detention drive high achievers at work.Empowerment with dignity and respect changes people. Even violent kids protect the adult who treats them that way and who they believe actually cares.Massimo's Observe move this week: the next time you feel a craving, an urge, or the pull to snap, write the exact sentence running through your head. That is your hot thought. Then run two AFROG questions. Does this thinking keep me healthy? Is this based on what is real? If it fails either question, you caught it before it caught you.Timestamps00:00 Why the drink is never first 00:32 How AFROG names the five question test 04:12 How pinball reacting loses control of your life 05:43 Why a hot thought drives the snap 07:07 How stop look listen raises the odds 07:57 How mindfulness catches you before the urge wins 09:28 How addiction-making family rules load hot thoughts 11:51 Why stuffing feelings ends in a blowup 15:25 Why detention kids and high achievers share the same rules 15:46 How Faye's formula names expectations minus reality 26:01 Why dignity and respect keep even violent kids protective 29:24 How to run this week's Observe move Resources🎁 Free gift! The exact 5 tools I use with clients to name what is really driving the urge to numb, before it takes over. Grab them free: https://sobermethod.com/5tools📘 Digital S.O.B.E.R. Method, available now: https://amazon.com/dp/B0H93ZTVS9Call to ActionIf you want lasting sobriety without walking into a room that could follow the job or the license, start at https://sobermethod.com/services. About the GuestBernard (Bernie) Glos, Ph.D., is a clinical psychologist who has practiced since 1971. His career spans Benedictine University, inner-city Chicago mental health, UIC psychiatry and neuropsychology, managed care clinical director for Illinois, first clinical director at Gateway Foundation where he led Joint Commission accreditation, the DuPage County drug court design team, and a nationally recognized detention program built on thinking change and empowerment. He has worked with violent youth historically and with high-achieving adults and workplace settings more recently. Your Future is SOBER™

    Why Hot Thoughts Hit Before the Craving Does

  6. Sep 23

    Why Achievement Can Be as Addictive as the Bottle

    Never a drink. Just a kid who learned to disappear into being useful. Lolita Guarin joins Massimo Rigotti to show how constantly needing to produce becomes the adult burnout pattern, how the CALM process (Control, Accept, Limit, Multiply) rebuilds self-trust, and why saying no will not kill you. This is the Observe and Restore work of the S.O.B.E.R. Method, for people who want sobriety and cannot walk into a public room to admit it. Key TakeawaysThe survival skill that gets a kid through a house with addiction is often the same skill that burns the adult out: constantly needing to produce.Achievement can be as addictive as the bottle it grew up next to. If you only feel seen when you are producing, stopping feels like death.CALM is Control, Accept, Limit, and Multiply. Control asks what is yours to carry and what is not. Accept finds the silver lining without pretending the pain is fine. Limit is the courage to stop what no longer serves you. Multiply is doubling what already works.Loyalty to old authorities keeps high achievers stuck. Take the authorities off the pedestal. They were people with their own trauma too, and they can be wrong.Nobody will die if you say no. Start small. Build the muscle until boundaries feel like self-trust, not selfishness.If you stop performing, the wall will not fall apart. One minute of doing nothing can expose how terrified you are of resting.Massimo's Observe and Restore move this week: catch a yes that should have been no, write what you told yourself, run a control audit (is this mine to carry?), set one boundary out loud before Sunday, then pick one thing that refills you and do it twice.Timestamps00:00 Why disappearing into being useful still runs adult life 00:50 How constantly needing to produce names the skill 01:27 How Control separates what is yours to carry 03:25 How Accept finds a silver lining without denial 04:45 How Limit stops the madness of doing the same thing 09:27 How Multiply doubles what already works 16:49 Why the ER wake-up call forced a different life 20:22 How a one-minute phone alarm exposes self-abandonment 23:08 Why nobody will die if you say no 24:48 Why the wall will not fall if you stop performing 27:28 How to run this week's Observe and Restore move 28:39 What keeps Lolita putting one foot in front of the other Resources🎁 Free gift! The exact 5 tools I use with clients to name what is really driving the urge to numb, before it takes over. Grab them free: https://sobermethod.com/5tools📘 Digital S.O.B.E.R. Method, available now: https://amazon.com/dp/B0H93ZTVS9Call to ActionIf you want lasting sobriety without walking into a room that could follow you back to your job or risk your license, start at https://sobermethod.com/services. About the GuestLolita Guarin is a stress management coach and the author of Stress Management for Adult Children of Alcoholics. Born in Lithuania and later an immigrant to the US, she built the CALM process after people-pleasing and overwork put her in the emergency room. She helps high achievers trade performing for real self-trust. Start at https://www.beamazingyou.com/ instagram.com/@be_amazing_you Your Future is SOBER™

    Why Achievement Can Be as Addictive as the Bottle

  7. Sep 16

    Why the Crab Pulling You Down Is You

    You finally decide to change, and something pulls you back down. Bryan Blackmon joins Massimo Rigotti to show how crabs in a bucket keep you stuck, why the crab is often you, and how CRAB: Clean, Resilient, Adaptability, and Belief hold the climb when the old off switch is gone. This is the Behavior and Execute work of the S.O.B.E.R. Method, for people who want sobriety and cannot walk into a public room to admit it. Key Takeaways Crabs in a bucket do not need a lid. The old crowd, the invitation, and the voice that says who are you kidding all pull you back down.About eight times out of ten, Bryan found the crab was himself. Blaming the bucket is easier than owning the choice to stay in it.No one is coming to save you. Support helps, but the climb only starts when you put one foot in front of the other.CRAB is Clean, Resilient, Adaptability, and Belief. Clean is mind, body, and spirit, not substances alone. Belief that you are worthy is the foundation the rest stacks on.Firm resolve after the aha moment lets the wrong people fall away without burning every relationship on day one.The morning at the mirror landed four words that rehabs never stuck: you are worth it. If you are already waiting for that moment, you may already be in it.Massimo's Behavior and Execute move this week: run a bucket audit, set one boundary before you walk into the room, add one crew member who is climbing the same direction, and journal what shifted each night.Timestamps 00:00 Why crabs in a bucket need no lid 01:01 How to spot if the crab is you 03:50 Why no one is coming to save you 05:26 How firm resolve drops the wrong crowd 09:26 How the four CRAB pillars work 17:45 How to hold pressure without numbing 34:23 Why you are worth it finally sticks 43:36 How to run a bucket audit this week Resources & Links 🎁 Free gift! The exact 5 tools I use with clients to name what is really driving the urge to numb, before it takes over. Grab them free: https://sobermethod.com/5tools📘 Digital S.O.B.E.R. Method, available now: https://amazon.com/dp/B0H93ZTVS9Call to Action If you want lasting sobriety without walking into a room that could follow the job or the license, start at https://sobermethod.com/services. About the Guest Bryan Blackmon went from sleeping in his car on the streets of California to nine hundred days sober, running live event productions with no room for error, and leading a recovery community over one hundred and forty thousand strong built on four words: you are worth it. Bryan Blackmon / Crab Crew Life: https://crabcrewlife.com All of Bryan's links: https://linktr.ee/bryanandelaine Your Future is SOBER™

    Why the Crab Pulling You Down Is You

  8. Sep 9

    Why Feeling Buried Does Not Mean You Are Broken

    If life keeps knocking you down, the next bit of strength does not come from carrying it alone. Mia Godfrey joins Massimo Rigotti to show how community, honest pain, and faith rebuild a life after loss, and why numbing only postpones the work. This is the Restore step of the S.O.B.E.R. Method, for people who want sobriety and will not walk into a public room to admit it. Key Takeaways One hour at a time did not give Mia hope. What helped was community and being honest enough to let someone else step in.Performing fine and mixing a drink with medication only numbed the pain, but it did not process it.Feeling buried does not mean you are broken. Mia's mother taught her that a buried person is a seed.Do not force someone else's stages of grief. Be in the moment, cry if you need to, and then do not stay stuck.Trading alcohol for overwork is still an addiction if the pain underneath is untouched.Buried Not Broken exists because Mia's sister asked her to tell the story. Putting it in the open brought healing.Massimo's restore step this week is to name grief when it rises, to avoid reaching for the off switch, and then to take one act, a prayer, a call, or write the memory down.Timestamps 00:00 Where the next strength comes from 02:19 Why numbing never processes pain 04:31 How faith carries you through loss 06:20 Why buried does not mean broken 08:08 How to grieve without rushing it 12:47 When moonshine became the off switch 18:01 Why she told the whole story 23:39 How to take one restore act Resources & Links Free gift. The exact 5 tools I use with clients to name what is really driving the urge to numb, before it takes over. Grab them free: https://sobermethod.com/5toolsDigital S.O.B.E.R. Method, available now: https://amazon.com/dp/B0H93ZTVS9Call to Action If you want lasting sobriety, Massimo understands the unique pressures that drive elite professionals toward substance dependency. Start at https://sobermethod.com/services. About the Guest Mia Godfrey is the author of Buried Not Broken and rebuilt after loss after loss by letting people in and telling the truth. Start with her work at https://miagodfrey.com/. Your Future is SOBER™

    Why Feeling Buried Does Not Mean You Are Broken
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Sobriety and addiction recovery for high-achieving professionals. Learn how to quit drinking, beat burnout, and build an alcohol-free life without losing your edge or risking your career. The SOBER Method is a weekly podcast for high-achieving professionals who quietly rely on alcohol, drugs, or other dependencies to cope with stress, pressure, and burnout, and who want a proven path to quit for good without losing their edge. Host Massimo Rigotti is 10 years sober and creator of the SOBER Method, a five-step framework: Stoic, Observe, Behavior, Execute, Restore. He works privately with lawyers, doctors, pharmacists, executives, veterans, and entrepreneurs. Each week: real coaching sessions and interviews with high performers who quit drinking and built alcohol-free lives. If you've ever searched "how to quit drinking without AA or rehab," wondered whether you're a high-functioning alcoholic or a gray area drinker, or asked how to stay sober while running a demanding career, this show was made for you. Topics: how to stop drinking alcohol, high-functioning alcoholism, gray area drinking, sober curious living, relapse prevention, managing stress and burnout without substances, socializing and networking alcohol-free, Stoicism for addiction recovery, and rebuilding confidence after addiction. New episodes weekly. Every episode stands alone. Press play on any one. If you're a professional who drinks to cope, or you love someone who does, start here.

Information

  • Creator
    Massimo Rigotti
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    37
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Massimo Rigotti
  • Show Website
    The SOBER Method