The Pretend Pros

Jennifer Hoffman

Welcome to The Pretend Pros, the sports podcast where the takes are hot and the expertise is...questionable. We're two die-hard fans breaking down weekly stories in sports, from March Madness and college rivalries to whatever interesting story catches our eyes. One of us might know what we're talking about...the other is just here for the chaos. This is The Pretend Pros -- certified fans, uncertified experts.

  1. 4d ago

    Episode 12: Just Keep Running with Emily Mars Raymond

    Forget everything you think you know about running. Emily Mars Raymond, a former Ohio State cross-country star and nine-time Boston Marathon veteran, spills the secret sauce to running a 100-mile race. Spoiler alert, it involves Pringles and the art of lying to yourself to keep going. Whether you’re a casual jogger or just curious about why anyone would run 50 miles on purpose, this episode is a must-listen. Emily’s story is a fascinating journey from high school athlete to ultra-running warrior. She shares how she balances training, sometimes 60 miles a week, while working as a social worker at a hospital and raising three kids. Plus, she’s got expert tips on fueling the body, training, and which snacks make elite runners crush their goals. Ever wondered what mile 80 of a hundred miler feels like? Emily takes us there. We break down: the surprising team side of cross country, the real deal about qualifying for Boston, why running a Taco Bell race might just be your new thing, and what it’s like to go from a high schooler chasing flowers to a woman who’s still running competitively. She’s raced on hills, roads, and even through snow, proving that while runners might be a little crazy, they’re also some of the most inspiring folks you’ll ever meet. No matter if you’re considering your first 5K or dreaming of that elusive marathon medal, Emily’s story shows that running isn’t just a sport—it's a mindset, a community, and yes, a delicious snack-fueled adventure that anyone can start. She reminds us that the best part isn’t finishing first, it’s showing up for yourself, no matter how slow you are. Get ready to be motivated, entertained, and maybe convinced to lace up your shoes. Hit play and discover why this episode might just make you want to run a little...verrrrry slowly, perhaps, but run nonetheless.

    38 min

  2. May 26

    Episode 11: Sports Stories of the Week with Doug Morris

    Welcome to the latest episode of The Pretend Pros where chaos, comedy, and cluelessness collide. In this tongue-in-cheek episode, Beth and Jenny throw sports knowledge out the window and rely on their guest Doug Morris (aka, self-proclaimed executive producer) to hold the line. Spoiler: That line is pretty much nonexistent. From the Cavs and the NBA playoffs to the wildest baseball trends (yes, shirtless sections and mascots waving shirts like a mid-game dance party), they cover it all with a healthy dose of humor. Ever wondered about the secret to college softball pitchers throwing 80 mph or how a squirrel became the MVP in a baseball game? They've got you covered. You'll discover: the bizarre MLB trend of “tarps off” sections in baseball stadiums, how to wear a Rally Cap, a high schooler scoring millions in soccer, and the woman throwing 79 mph pitches in softball. Think you need in-depth analysis? Think again. This episode is perfect if you want nonstop laughs, surprising facts, and a reminder that sometimes, sports are just a really good excuse to have fun. Whether you're a die-hard fan or just here for the comedy, this episode guarantees smiles, laughter, and maybe even a new appreciation for sports you never understood.

    47 min

  3. May 19

    Episode 10: In the Penalty Box with David Danielewicz

    Most people think hockey is just skating fast and hitting hard — turns out, there’s a whole universe of rules, strategies, and behind-the-scenes action that could make even the most clueless fan into an expert overnight. Ever wondered what it’s really like to score a goal, break a stick, or survive a fight on ice? Prepare to become the MVP of hockey trivia after this episode. Jenny and Beth—your favorite rookies—bring in the ultimate insider, hockey coach and player David Danielewicz, who’s been mastering the game since the age of four in Buffalo and still plays for the Carolina Hurricanes Warriors. He shares hilarious stories from growing up playing the game, the different levels of hockey, and debates whether or not Jenny could score a goal on the ice. You’ll discover: How a kid who started with a dream of playing hockey ended up with a real trading cardThe secret “edges” figure skaters use that hockey players desperately need to learnWhy NHL players skate 17 minutes per game, and how linesmen clock an astonishing 8 miles on their skates each matchThe wild rules of fighting, the penalty box, and what really triggers a game ejectionThe ins and outs of hockey zone coverage, strategies, and how players switch from checking to scoringPlus, David’s tips for a rookie trying to score a goal—or even just staing upright on skates Whether you’re a die-hard fan or just hockey-curious, missing out on this episode is like leaving your helmet at home, you’re missing the essentials. Perfect for sports fans, aspiring players, or anyone who secretly wanted to know if hockey players really do lose teeth or if that’s just a myth. This isn’t your average sports chat, it’s a crash course in the coolest, craziest sport on ice (literally). Hit play and get ready to score some knowledge points. Just remember, no backwards skating in the shootout! David Danielewicz is hockey coach and player, whose 25+ years of coaching, championship wins, and a surprisingly legit hockey trading card make him the guy who actually knows how the puck drops.

    47 min

  4. May 12

    Episode 9: Random Sports Talk

    This episode dives into the chaos and comedy that is Jenny and Beth. It includes stories from the NBA Playoffs, WNBA season openers, and even a preview of our special hockey guest that will be joining us in a future episode. From Cleveland’s nail-biting game to IU alma mater bragging rights, we uncover the crazy moments, surprising stats, and quirky traditions that makes sports so unpredictable, and hilarious. Plus, we chat about the underdog Buffalo Sabres’ 17-year drought and the intense thrill of a WNBA game that included higher scoring than an NBA game (yes, really). Perfect if you're a casual fan or a dedicated sports junkie craving some fresh, funny takes. No expertise needed, just come for the laughs, stay for the surprises, and maybe get a new appreciation for sports you never knew existed. Whatever team you root for, there’s a little chaos for everyone. And don’t worry, next week, we’re bringing in a hockey expert, so buckle up for some serious puck talk (or lack thereof). Until then, grab your favorite snack, settle in, and enjoy the most authentic sports banter you didn’t know you needed.

    50 min

  5. May 5

    Episode 8: The "Pretend" Combine

    When Jenny gets a wild idea in her head, you never know where it will lead. Case in point, a casual conversation about the NFL Combine and the 40-yard dash leads to The Pretend Pros hosting their very own "Pretend" Combine. Can Jenny run the 40-yard dash faster than Tom Brady or catch passes better than Travis Kelce? You'll find out in this week's episode. Spoiler alert: She's not planning to quit her day job...yet. Beth and Jenny discuss 40-yard dash records, share amusing stories related to the combine, and even get out on the football field to attempt some combine skills. Full of witty humor and sarcasm, this episode is sure to have you laughing out loud.

    22 min

  6. Apr 28

    Episode 7: Draft Day

    Join Beth and Jenny as they cover a range of topics including the WNBA draft, NFL draft, and NFL Combine player stories. Jenny even makes a bold (crazy) prediction that she will run the 40-yd dash. Stay tuned! Takeaways WNBA and NFL draftsPlayer stories Chapters 00:00 WNBA Draft and Player Stories08:00 NFL Draft and Player Experiences18:28 Draft Anticipation and Season Excitement

    36 min

  7. Apr 21

    Episode 6: Tournament Recaps

    Beth and Jenny cover a detailed recap of March Madness and the Masters, providing insights into the tournament outcomes and player performances. They also delve into the impact of the transfer portal and NIL on college sports, highlighting the challenges and opportunities presented by these developments. Takeaways March Madness Tournament RecapThe Masters Tournament Recap Chapters 00:00 March Madness Recap11:35 Masters Recap

    36 min

  8. Apr 14

    Episode 5: Kicking It with Mollie Whitacre

    Ready to go from clueless to soccer connoisseur faster than a striker on a breakaway? Buckle up as we chat with Mollie Whitacre -- soccer state champion, Division I player, and The Pretend Pros first guest -- about the game’s ins and outs. Whether you're planning to watch the World Cup this year or just impress your friends with your offsides knowledge, this episode is packed with fun facts, strategic insights, and a whole lot of “a-ha” moments. In this episode:Mollie breaks down the roles of defenders, midfielders, and forwardsThe secrets behind the “offsides” rule and how it’s more nuanced than it looksInsights on how soccer players condition, including the beep testA peek into the soccer journey from walk-on to scholarship at Ohio UniversityHow international tournaments like the FIFA World Cup workThe story behind Mollie’s championship plaza and her team’s impressive high school legacyTimestamps:00:00 - Welcome to the episode with rookie hosts and our first-ever guest Mollie Whitacre 02:14 - Mollie’s high school soccer mastery and state championship feats 03:23 - College soccer journey from walk-on to star at Ohio University 08:02 - What exactly does a midfielder do? Insights from the field 10:01 - Soccer formations explained—think flexible basketball lineup strategies 15:26 - Conditioning, beep tests, and the fitness grind of a college athlete 17:42 - Demystifying offsides: The rule, the controversy, and how referees call it 22:40 - Spotting chances to shoot and recognizing real goal moments 23:51 - Playground fakery? How players fake injuries to buy time or strategize 26:43 - Match scoring, points systems, and the eternal debate on ties 27:49 - The pathway to World Cup stardom and the league hierarchy in the US and abroad 30:46 - The upcoming FIFA World Cup: format, qualifiers, and the men’s vs women’s tournaments 33:16 - How to enjoy your first soccer game—field markings, penalty areas, and what to look for 35:28 - The legendary statue of Mollie in championship plaza

    37 min
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About

Welcome to The Pretend Pros, the sports podcast where the takes are hot and the expertise is...questionable. We're two die-hard fans breaking down weekly stories in sports, from March Madness and college rivalries to whatever interesting story catches our eyes. One of us might know what we're talking about...the other is just here for the chaos. This is The Pretend Pros -- certified fans, uncertified experts.

Information

  • Creator
    Jennifer Hoffman
  • Years Active
    2K
  • Episodes
    13
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Jennifer Hoffman