Ben and James Could Do Better: Two Teachers, No Idea

Ben and James: Secondary School Teachers

Ben and James Could Do Better is a comedy podcast for secondary school teachers—recorded somewhere between the staff room, a lukewarm coffee, and a rapidly disappearing biscuit. If you’re searching for a secondary education podcast that actually reflects life in a UK classroom, you’re in the right place. Less phonics and glitter, more behaviour management, GCSE pressure, and the reality of teaching teenagers. With fifty years of combined experience in secondary schools, Ben and James have seen it all—from Progress 8 panic to the chaos of Year 9 on a Friday afternoon. This is the honest, funny take on teaching in the UK, packed with the kind of staff room conversations teachers don’t usually get time to have. Whether you’re an experienced teacher, an ECT navigating your first placement, or just curious about the state of modern education, there’s something here for you. No laminated posters. No inspirational assemblies. No budget. Just real talk about teacher life, workload, behaviour, and surviving the school week. We all went to school.Ben and James just never left.

  1. 6d ago

    STOPP, Breathe, and Have a Nice Holiday

    Summer holidays sound like freedom, until you realise you're still packing the car, juggling childcare, and trying to find five quiet minutes while life carries on at full volume. We start with a very real chat about time off: being a bit pedantic about continuity, craving routine while simultaneously rejecting it, and planning a shorter, budget-friendly break to the West Country based largely on what the children actually enjoy. Spoiler: sometimes the biggest thrill isn't a beach. It's a different bed to bounce on. From there we tumble into family holiday nostalgia, the kind that smells faintly of a locked-up self-catering cottage and warm sandwiches. We talk packed-to-the-gunnels cars, slow motorway miles, service stations where you're "not allowed anything", and the quiet dread some of us felt before we'd even arrived. Then we reach the true battleground: the Kellogg's variety pack, where the chocolate cereals disappear first and the cornflakes become a form of punishment. If you grew up on UK seaside breaks and tight budgeting, you'll recognise every bit of it. Eventually, it's time for another list. This week we look at a collection of summer teacher wellbeing advice from our old friends at Education Support. There's the circle of control, influence and concern, dedicated worry time, wellbeing action plans, non-negotiables, morning routines and weekly check-ins. In other words, a relaxing summer holiday that apparently requires rather more organisation than the school term itself. We pick apart the advice, question why "switching off" apparently needs quite so much planning, and arrive at the pièce de résistance: STOPP. Stop, take a breath, observe, pull back, practise what works. A five-step process for dealing with difficult thoughts and emotions which somehow manages to make having a moment into an administrative procedure. If you've ever been told to relax, only to discover you've been given a framework, an action plan and a set of weekly targets for doing so, this one's for you. Leave us a review, share the episode with a tired colleague, and get in touch. What does a genuinely restful summer break look like for you? Email: bandjcdb@gmail.com Website: benandjamescoulddobetter.com* Send us Fan Mail Support the show

  2. Aug 3

    Wristband Tyrants, Duolingo Guilt, and 16 Terrible Summer Job Ideas

    We start with a small family milestone as James realises this episode will go out on his daughter Matilda's birthday. At the time of recording, plans for the big day are still very much TBC—an August birthday can be brilliant for cake and presents but terrible for guest lists. From there, we tumble into the reality of soft play, party rooms, pizza, and the uniquely stressful moment when you have to tell a room full of children they're not allowed back on the climbing frame... even though the only way out is straight through it. An unexpectedly pedantic leisure centre manager's passionate belief in the wristband policy turns into a rant about inconsistent systems before we time-jump into pure nostalgia at Swansea Leisure Centre: the armband announcements, the wave machine, and that unforgettable slide that briefly sends you outside the building. Along the way, we also dip into Duolingo, language streak anxiety, and why an eight-year-old learning Hungarian is both impressive and slightly unsettling when the app starts guilt-tripping you. Eventually, it's time for this week's victim. This week's victim is a list of 16 summer job ideas for teachers. It promises practical ways to boost your income over the holidays. Instead, it mixes sensible suggestions with recycled advice, duplicated ideas, American jobs that don't really exist in the UK (despite this supposedly being a UK list), and the kind of freelance promises that sound much easier on paper than they are in real life. We pick apart the list, debate whether teachers really want a second job during the summer, and ask which ideas might genuinely work—from tutoring and freelance writing to proofreading, AI, and the ever-present temptation to earn extra money without sacrificing the holiday you've spent eleven months waiting for. If you're a teacher who tops up your income over the summer, someone who believes the holidays are sacred, or you've got a side hustle that's actually worth recommending, we'd love to hear from you. Better still, if you'd like a shout-out on the show, get in touch. Leave us a review, share the episode with a colleague, and drop us a message. Email: bandjcdb@gmail.com Website: benandjamescoulddobetter.com Send us Fan Mail Support the show

  3. Jul 27

    Relaxing Is Hard Work

    A smoke machine goes on, the fire alarm follows, and suddenly the last minutes of the school day turn into a full-blown evacuation. It turns out there's no better way to end term than standing on the school field wondering whether anyone actually knows what's going on. From there, we celebrate the end of the year in the most teacherly way possible: Kong Strong Wild Power, generously donated along with a legendary haul of other snacks from a colleague who actually enjoyed Episode 11. It reminds us that high-calorie snacks remain the unofficial currency of education. Along the way, we end up talking about teacher stress, routines, and what "switching off" really means when you've spent the last ten months running on adrenaline. We also tackle the strange contradiction at the heart of the summer holidays. Teachers spend weeks counting down to the break, only to discover that stopping is harder than expected. For many of us, the holidays aren't really a holiday at all—they're simply a different kind of busy, especially when family life and childcare take over. We even wonder aloud whether we should stop satirising internet lists and try something different... before immediately turning to another list. This week's victim is a "Ten Ways to Wind Down During the Summer" guide for teachers. On paper, it's full of perfectly sensible advice: unplug, find a hobby, spend time in nature, read for pleasure, travel, practise self-care. The problem is that almost none of it has anything to do with teachers—or the summer. We ask whether generic wellbeing advice actually helps burnt-out teachers, or whether it's just another list that sounds reassuring without really understanding the problem. If you've ever reached the summer holidays feeling too tired to enjoy them—or if you've got an unforgettable end-of-term disaster story—we'd love to hear from you. Leave us a review, share the episode with a colleague, and get in touch. Email: bandjcdb@gmail.com Website: benandjamescoulddobetter.com Send us Fan Mail Support the show

  4. Jul 20

    He-Man and the Perfect Mug of Tea

    Milk first or milk last? It sounds like a harmless question until you ask it in a British staffroom. We tumble from casual brew chat into a proper national obsession: tea-making etiquette, why coffee somehow escapes the same scrutiny, and how a single mug can generate stronger opinions than most staff meetings. Along the way, we pit science against George Orwell in the great milk debate, discover the surprisingly specific "correct" colour of tea, and somehow find ourselves using He-Man as an entirely reasonable reference point.  Eventually, we arrive at this week's list. This week's victim is a list of end-of-term classroom activities that promises to keep secondary students engaged during the final week of school. Instead, it raises far more questions than it answers. Who is supplying thirty board games? How exactly do you "host Taskmaster" without the room descending into chaos? And why do so many online teaching ideas seem to have been invented by people who've never actually met a class on the last Friday in July? We also tackle the annual debate over end-of-term films, the frustration of only ever watching the first forty minutes, and why we'd often rather teach a normal lesson than pretend half a Disney film counts as learning. If you've got stronger opinions on tea than teaching—or better ideas for surviving the last week of term—we'd love to hear them. Leave us a review, share the episode with a colleague, and if you've got a better last-week-of-term activity—or a definitive answer to the milk debate—we'd love to hear from you. Email: bandjcdb@gmail.com Website: benandjamescoulddobetter.com Send us Fan Mail Support the show

  5. Jul 13

    The Ultimate Guide That Forgot Step Four

    A checklist can look impressively professional and still be completely useless. This week's proof is an "ultimate guide to organising school trips" that can't even keep track of its own Step Four. Before we get there, though, we wander off into the story of Jack Wild, the Artful Dodger from Oliver!, and the way celebrity encounters slowly evolve into family folklore until someone is convinced their dad was one casting decision away from Hollywood. From there, it's school productions, choir memories with Harry Secombe, and why the smallest performances often become the stories people remember for decades. Eventually—unlike some recent episodes—we remember this is supposed to be a podcast about secondary education. After a brief disagreement over this week's postcard, we set about dismantling the list. This week's victim is a school trips checklist that promises to tell teachers everything they need to know. Instead, it: Skips crucial steps,Muddles the order completely, andSomehow makes one of the most complicated parts of teaching sound like assembling flat-pack furniture.We pick apart the advice, discuss what actually goes into organising a successful school trip—from risk assessments and parent communication to medical information and logistical chaos—and ask whether some educational guidance is written by people who've ever organised a trip in the first place. If you've ever planned a school trip, spent hours chasing consent forms, or found yourself shouting, "That's not even the next step!", this episode is for you. Leave us a review, and while you're there, tell us about your best (or worst) school trip memory. Email: bandjcdb@gmail.comWebsite: benandjamescoulddobetter.comSend us Fan Mail Support the show

  6. Jul 6

    Five Contradictory Steps to Starting Secondary School

    Crisps on a microphone shouldn't lead to a serious conversation about education. And, to be fair, it doesn't. Instead, it leads to a deep dive into the world of crisps, followed closely by Ben trying to recreate James' morning routine as though it were a gritty Sunday night TV drama. Once we've finished auditioning actors for this dark, brooding biopic, we drift into the rest of the domestic chaos: reluctant wake-ups, hair dramas, and a child who currently insists on wearing a rotating collection of animal ears wherever they go. Along the way, we debate whether adults need to "perform" for children, what a proper homecoming from work actually looks like, and why Friday night pizza is less of a treat than a survival strategy. Eventually, we remember this is supposed to be an education podcast. This week's victim is a list of advice on helping pupils move from Year 6 to Year 7. On paper, it promises practical guidance. In reality, it's another collection of educational clichés, obvious observations, and suggestions that sound far more impressive than they are useful. We pick apart the recommendations, wonder how five pieces of advice can contradict each other so spectacularly, and lament missing the webinar that promised to use the power of celebrity to help Year 6 pupils settle into secondary school. If you've ever read an education article and wondered whether the author has actually met a Year 7—or if you just want to hear the pitch for James' upcoming television debut—this one's for you. Leave us a review, and while you're there, let us know: what's your Friday night comfort food? Email: bandjcdb@gmail.com Website: benandjamescoulddobetter.com Send us Fan Mail Support the show

  7. Jun 29

    Panini Stickers, Tangled Cassettes & Sugar-Free Lies

    Crack open a lukewarm can of Aldi 'Red Thunder' and get your pencils ready—we are taking an impromptu stroll down a very specific, tape-tangled memory lane. We kick off this week’s second-half double header by tackling the ubiquitous world of sugar-free drinks. They are absolutely everywhere, but we’re not entirely convinced they deserve the health halo they’ve picked up along the way. We dig into the awkward question people tend to skip past: if you’re having a fizzy drink as a treat, why pretend it’s a moral decision? From full-sugar classics to Diet and Zero versions, we compare taste, talk honestly about artificial sweeteners, and admit why some of them still don’t quite work for us. Things get even stranger when fast food chains start policing the drink menu while leaving everything else completely untouched. We unpack the logic of serving fried chicken, chips, and desserts alongside strict rules on full-sugar cola, and question whether these choices are really about health—or just corporate messaging. From there, the diet chat gets a bit too real. We confess to our own terrible habits: skipping breakfast, surviving on coffee and biscuits, and the recurring tragedy of never packing a lunch to work (a stream-of-consciousness anecdote Ben loves so much he literally retold it from Episode 5). We lay our questionable food intakes bare and talk about the exact moment a throwaway comment about cholesterol suddenly stops being funny. Finally, a museum postcard featuring a classic cassette tape triggers a sharp turn into heavy, unadulterated nostalgia. We dive headfirst into the sights and sounds of our youth: mixtapes, Sunday chart countdowns, ghetto blasters, VCRs, video rental shops, Panini stickers, and the sacred art of rescuing a tangled tape with a pencil. We do our absolute best to prove we genuinely grew up as children of the 1980s, all while trying (and slightly failing) to stay clear of the usual American pop-culture clichés. Rewind With Us If you survived the '80s, still know how to rewind a cassette by hand, or just enjoy listening to two tired teachers spiral into a stream of consciousness, hit subscribe and share this episode with a mate down the hall! Drop us a review and let us know: Are you team full-sugar, team sugar-free, or team water? (And do your friends actively refuse to listen to your podcast, too?) Email: bandjcdb@gmail.comWeb: benandjamescoulddobetter.comSend us Fan Mail Support the show

  8. Jun 22

    The Lolly Stick Lottery Nobody Wants To Win

    That first bite of a "healthy" ice lolly can tell you everything you need to know. We try a supposedly premium fruit lolly that somehow tastes more like frozen sweetener than fruit, before rescuing the mood with a proper classic: the Fab. From the chocolate coating to the hundreds and thousands, we get surprisingly forensic about texture, flavour, and why some frozen treats still feel like instant summer. The nostalgia doesn't stop there. We revisit childhood favourites including Funny Feet, Mini Milk, and Screwballs, along with the questionable joy of finding bubblegum where ice cream ought to be. Along the way, we remember corner-shop culture, penny sweets, and the treats that definitely wouldn't make it onto a school trip today. If you enjoy conversations about budget supermarkets, Aldi ice creams, and whether value can beat brand, you'll feel right at home. Then, inevitably, we swerve into education. "Lolly stick anxiety" sounds silly until you think about what it feels like when your name might be pulled to answer a question. We talk about fairness, SEND realities, and how seemingly small classroom routines can create genuine stress when pupils don't feel safe. We also confess to our football ignorance, unpack the social pressure surrounding the World Cup, and finish by reading some of the increasingly grand marketing emails that arrive once you've released a few podcast episodes. Expect SEO sales pitches, AI literacy platforms, and guest requests from people who have clearly never listened to the show. If you enjoy funny, honest conversations about teaching, childhood nostalgia, and the everyday systems that shape how we feel, hit subscribe, share the episode with a mate, and leave us a review. We want to hear from you: What's the ice lolly that takes you straight back? Email: bandjcdb@gmail.com Website: benandjamescoulddobetter.com Send us Fan Mail Support the show

See All (20)

Trailer

About

Ben and James Could Do Better is a comedy podcast for secondary school teachers—recorded somewhere between the staff room, a lukewarm coffee, and a rapidly disappearing biscuit. If you’re searching for a secondary education podcast that actually reflects life in a UK classroom, you’re in the right place. Less phonics and glitter, more behaviour management, GCSE pressure, and the reality of teaching teenagers. With fifty years of combined experience in secondary schools, Ben and James have seen it all—from Progress 8 panic to the chaos of Year 9 on a Friday afternoon. This is the honest, funny take on teaching in the UK, packed with the kind of staff room conversations teachers don’t usually get time to have. Whether you’re an experienced teacher, an ECT navigating your first placement, or just curious about the state of modern education, there’s something here for you. No laminated posters. No inspirational assemblies. No budget. Just real talk about teacher life, workload, behaviour, and surviving the school week. We all went to school.Ben and James just never left.

Information

You Might Also Like