I'm Fine! - The Truth Behind the Smile

Jayne
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Exploring why caring people struggle to care for themselves and why we say "I'm fine" when we are not. Through expert conversations, the podcast supports listeners in overcoming compassion fatigue and rebuilding resilience. 

  1. 8h ago

    #30 Dr Jo Braid From Burnout to Balance: Rehab Medicine, Coaching and the Power of White Space

    In this episode of I'm Fine, The Truth Behind the Smile, Jayne Ellis is joined by Dr Jo Braid, a UK trained doctor now based in Australia, specialising in rehabilitation medicine and burnout recovery coaching, and host of her own long running podcast. Jo shares her journey from Nottingham Medical School to rehabilitation medicine in Australia, and the pull towards the biopsychosocial side of patient care. She talks candidly about setting up her own functional medicine clinic in a small regional town, and how the isolation and responsibility of solo practice eventually tipped her into burnout. Jayne and Jo explore what burnout actually looked like for her: working late once the children were in bed, a quietly observant husband who noticed the change first, and a perfectionist mindset that made stepping back feel impossible. Jo reflects honestly on quitting her clinic, and why she would not necessarily recommend that route to others now. The conversation turns to what really helped her recover: coaching, learning to name and track emotions, and a deep dive into mindset work that eventually became her own coaching and podcasting career. Jo is refreshingly clear that leaving a job or profession is not always the answer, and explains the workplace factors that matter far more than individual resilience alone. They also discuss Schwartz Rounds, a simple but powerful way for hospital staff of every kind to come together and share what it is really like to work under pressure, and why creating white space in a working day, protected time to think, breathe or simply pause, is one of the most valuable things any organisation can offer its people. Finally, Jo shares her four pillars for staying well: mindset, movement, sleep and support, and why she still sees a coach herself after all these years of helping others. A warm, practical conversation about burnout, recovery and building a working life that does not cost you your health. Connect with Jo: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drjobraid/ Find out more about Jo's work: https://drjobraid.com EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup, founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Subscribe, share and leave a review to help more caring professionals find us. To be a guest, or just to say hello, reach us at info@eftraining.co.uk Learn more about Jayne Ellis and our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience training at http://eftraining.co.uk This podcast is for education and support only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. If you are struggling, please contact a qualified professional or your GP. Views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open, honest conversation.

  2. Oct 28

    #29 Ngozi Weller From Burnout to Belonging: Radical Honesty and Inclusive Workplaces

    A note before you listen: this episode includes a frank and open conversation about burnout, depression and suicidal thoughts. Please look after yourself while listening, and come back to it another time if today is not the right day. In this episode of I'm Fine, The Truth Behind the Smile, Jayne Ellis is joined by Ngozi Weller, co-founder and director of Aurora, a leadership development and organisational effectiveness consultancy that helps workplaces work better for everyone in them. Ngozi tells her story with warmth, humour and honesty: an insecure teenager who longed to be a writer, the news bulletin that sparked a far bigger ambition, and the winding path into a sixteen-year corporate career. She speaks candidly about the serious illness that changed the course of her life, and about being pushed out of that career by burnout. Ngozi describes just how dark things became, and what her recovery truly involved: the people who stepped in, professional support, and the slow, patient work of healing. Out of that experience, Aurora was born. Ngozi and Jayne explore how she turned everything she lived through into work that helps others: healthier, more inclusive workplaces where people can thrive. The conversation turns to that small phrase, I'm fine, and why we reach for it. Ngozi calls it the Robin Williams effect, and reflects on self-protection, the moments the mask slips, and why so few people really want to hear the honest answer. Finally, Ngozi opens up about how she looks after herself now: the idea of responsible selfishness, firstborn daughter syndrome and people pleasing, the radical honesty she now practises, and the running crew and weekend painting that keep her from running on empty. A powerful, funny and profoundly human conversation about ambition, resilience and learning to put yourself back on the list. Connect with Ngozi: https://www.linkedin.com/in/ngozi-weller-aurora/ Find out more about Aurora: https://aurorawellnessgroup.co.uk/ Listen to Ngozi's podcast, The Wellbeing Rebellion: https://podcasts.apple.com/gb/podcast/the-wellbeing-rebellion/id1675517581 EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup, founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Subscribe, share and leave a review to help more caring professionals find us. To be a guest, or just to say hello, reach us at info@eftraining.co.uk Learn more about Jayne Ellis and our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience training at http://eftraining.co.uk If you are struggling, you are not alone. In the UK you can call Samaritans free, day or night, on 116 123, or speak to your GP. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, please call 999. This podcast is for education and support only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. Views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open, honest conversation.

  3. Oct 21

    #28 Claire Gardner From Nursing to Leadership: Curiosity, Care and Building Inclusive Teams

    In this episode of I'm Fine, The Truth Behind the Smile, Jayne Ellis sits down with an old friend and former colleague, Claire Gardner, Managing Director of Dynamic Training and a former learning disability nurse. Claire shares the winding path that took her from nursing into education and then into running her own business. She talks about specialising in learning disability nursing, moving through paediatrics and health visiting, and grabbing every opportunity the NHS put in front of her, before eventually setting up the training company she still leads today. Jayne and Claire look back on the demanding BTEC programme they once taught together at university, and reflect on how much of that pressure came not from the subject itself but from the deep sense of responsibility they felt for their learners, and how that experience shaped the way Claire builds and supports teams now. Together they explore what it really takes to create an inclusive, supportive culture: why vision and values matter far more than words on a website, how honest scheduling and a personal approach to observations can protect people from overwhelm, and why no single adjustment ever meets everybody's needs. The conversation turns to the surprising number of transferable skills that come from a caring background: curiosity, the art of asking one more question, a non-judgemental way of meeting people, and the ability to coach, teach and lead by genuinely understanding others. Finally, Claire opens up about how she looks after herself. She shares her motto, keep moving forward, and what it has taught her about recognising when she cannot cope, giving herself time rather than simply pushing on, and the small daily rituals, dog walks in the Chilterns, time in nature and losing herself in a good book, that help her reset. A warm, honest conversation about people, purpose and looking after yourself while you spend your days looking after everyone else. Connect with Claire: https://www.linkedin.com/in/claire-gardner-393a231a/ Find out more about Dynamic Training: https://www.dynamictraining.org.uk/ EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup, founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Subscribe, share and leave a review to help more caring professionals find us. To be a guest, or just to say hello, reach us at info@eftraining.co.uk Learn more about Jayne Ellis and our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience training at http://eftraining.co.uk This podcast is for education and support only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. If you are struggling, please contact a qualified professional or your GP. Views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open, honest conversation.

  4. Oct 14

    #27 Dr Tim Anstiss The Power of Being Heard: How Better Conversations Can Change Lives

    In this episode of I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile, Jayne Ellis is joined by Dr Tim Anstiss, a medical doctor, health coach, motivational interviewing trainer and advocate for more compassionate approaches to behaviour change and wellbeing. Tim explains why simply telling people what they should do rarely leads to lasting change, and how motivational interviewing creates a very different kind of conversation, one built on curiosity, empathy, autonomy and collaboration. They explore the 'expert trap', why clinicians burn out when they feel responsible for changing their patients, and how helping people feel heard benefits not only patients and clients but also healthcare professionals, managers and leaders. The conversation turns to why so many people say 'I'm fine' when they aren't. Tim discusses stigma, shame and vulnerability, the importance of asking twice, and listening without immediately trying to fix things so someone has the space to talk. Jayne and Tim also explore self-compassion, mindfulness, psychological flexibility and the critical voice in our heads. Tim shares his own experiences of depression, anxiety and burnout, and practical techniques for changing our relationship with difficult thoughts and emotions. The episode includes a simple but powerful exercise in cognitive defusion, learning to notice our thoughts rather than automatically believing them, along with Tim's reflections on unconditional self-acceptance and the difference between self-criticism and compassionate self-correction. Connect with Tim: https://www.linkedin.com/in/drtimanstiss/ Dr Kristin Neff: https://self-compassion.org/ Professor Paul Gilbert and the Compassionate Mind Foundation: https://www.compassionatemind.co.uk/ Bill Miller, author of Listen Well: The Art of Empathetic Understanding: https://williamrmiller.net/training-speaking/ British Medical Journal (BMJ): https://bmjopen.bmj.com/content/12/2/e047626 EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup, founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Subscribe, share and leave a review to help more caring professionals find us. To be a guest, or just to say hello, reach us at info@eftraining.co.uk Learn more about Jayne Ellis and our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience training at http://eftraining.co.uk Content note: this episode discusses depression, anxiety and burnout, which some listeners may find difficult. This podcast is for education and support only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. If you are struggling, please contact a qualified professional or your GP. Views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open, honest conversation.

  5. Oct 7

    #26 Frances Alcock from Nurse to Funeral Director: Caring, Grief & the Courage to Change

    Jayne Ellis on I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile welcomes Frances Alcock, an independent funeral director and former nurse, for an honest conversation about nursing, career change, grief, transferable skills, emotional resilience and finding the courage to do things differently. Frances spent 30 years in nursing, beginning in oncology before moving into district nursing, nurse practitioner roles and finally becoming a multiple sclerosis specialist nurse. She shares what drew her to community nursing, why she preferred working one to one with patients, and the pressures of a healthcare system stretched by staff shortages and limited resources. After retiring from nursing she took an unexpected new direction and founded her own independent funeral business, Opals, which she has now run for around 10 years. The catalyst was the funeral of her beloved uncle: feeling his life had not been properly represented, she began researching the industry and asking whether she could offer families something different. She talks openly about the journey from nurse to funeral director: training as a celebrant, overcoming her fear of public speaking, and learning to run a business from scratch. She explains why nurses have an extraordinary range of transferable skills, from listening and problem solving to managing teams, and reflects on the emotional parallels between nursing and funeral directing. Together, Jayne and Frances explore facing death from a young age, the patients and families who stay with you long after the working day ends, and why some losses hit hardest. Frances shares how she protects her wellbeing through exercise, friendships, walking, holidays and, increasingly, allowing herself proper time away from work. They also discuss the changing face of funeral directing, towards giving families the freedom to create a funeral that reflects the person they have lost. At the heart of it is a simple reminder: saying 'I'm fine' and putting on a smile isn't always enough. Frances's message to anyone considering a change is to think outside the box, because your skills may be more transferable than you realise. Connect with Frances: https://www.linkedin.com/in/frances-alcock-b9b656109/ Find out more about Opals Funerals: https://www.opalsfunerals.co.uk/ Follow Opals on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/opalsfunerals/ EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup, founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Subscribe, share and leave a review to help more caring professionals find us. To be a guest, or just to say hello, reach us at info@eftraining.co.uk Learn more about Jayne Ellis and our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience training at http://eftraining.co.uk Content note: this episode discusses death, dying, bereavement and funeral directing, which some listeners may find upsetting. This podcast is for education and support only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. If you are struggling, please contact a qualified professional or your GP. Views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open, honest conversation.

  6. Sep 30

    #25 Poppy Mardall Breaking Taboo Around Death: Compassion, Boundaries and Looking After Yourself

    What happens when your job is to care for people at one of the hardest moments of their lives? In this powerful episode of I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile, Jayne Ellis is joined by Poppy Mardall, founder of Poppy's Funeral Directors in London, for an honest conversation about death, grief, compassion and boundaries. Poppy came to funeral directing from the art world, driven to do things differently after seeing poor standards of care in the sector. What began as a wish to give grieving families better care has grown into a team dedicated to helping people feel 'held and heard'. She is honest about the toll of such demanding work, and says her biggest lesson has been learning to look after herself. In the early days she gave everything, on call through the night and driving paperwork across London, until she realised that approach wasn't sustainable. Together, Jayne and Poppy explore boundaries, why caring professions make it so hard to recognise our own needs, why we should talk more openly about death, and the rituals that help us process loss. Poppy shares how swimming, walking and her support network keep her well, and why looking after yourself isn't selfish, it's what makes sustainable care possible. Find out more about Poppy's Funeral Directors: https://www.poppysfunerals.co.uk/ Connect with Poppy here: https://www.linkedin.com/in/poppy-mardall-b1215117/ and on Instagram https://www.instagram.com/poppy_mardall/ You can also follow Poppy's Funerals on social media: https://www.instagram.com/poppysfunerals/ https://www.facebook.com/poppysfunerals https://www.linkedin.com/company/poppy-s-funerals/ EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup. Founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. If today's conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, share and leave a review - it helps more professionals who care find this community. If you or someone you know would like to join the conversation and be a guest on our podcast, please get in touch. Connect with us at info@eftraining.co.uk Visit us at http://eftraining.co.uk for more information about Jayne Ellis and learn about our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience Training for Organisations and Individuals. Content note: This episode discusses death, dying, bereavement and funeral directing. Some listeners may find these subjects difficult or upsetting. Please note: This podcast is intended for education and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified professional or contact your GP. The views and opinions expressed by guests on this podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, values or position of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open conversation, learning and intended as a safe space for honest dialogue.

  7. Sep 23

    #24 Adrian Blake: ADHD, Belonging & Creating Spaces Where People Can Thrive

    Jayne Ellis on I'm Fine, The Truth Behind the Smile welcomes educator, coach and award-winning school leader Adrian Blake for a personal conversation about neurodivergence, inclusion, identity and creating environments where people can be themselves. Adrian shares an unexpected journey from wanting to join the army, through acting, into education and school leadership. Having had to engage with Educational Psychologists from primary school, he was eventually diagnosed with ADHD in his early twenties, and he reflects on growing up in a system that didn't understand neurodivergence, and how the right environments, structure and opportunities helped him thrive. From Headteacher of ArtsEd to using his experience as a Master Practitioner Coach with the EMCC to coach neurodivergent young people, Adrian explains why what holds people back often isn't their dyslexia, ADHD, dyspraxia or autism, but how they feel about themselves. He talks openly about being labelled and misunderstood at school, the toll of masking, and why performing arts can be such a powerful home for neurodivergent young people, where creativity and individuality become strengths rather than things to hide. Together, Jayne and Adrian discuss what parents should look for when choosing a school, why happiness and learning how to learn matter as much as academic results, and how to create genuinely neurodivergent-friendly workplaces through psychological safety, flexibility and space for creativity, recognising that progress doesn't always happen in a straight line. Jayne asks the question at the heart of the podcast: how does someone who spends his time supporting others look after himself? Adrian's answer is revealing: family, martial arts, exercise and purpose, and he reflects on why every organisation is, at its heart, a people organisation. Perhaps the most powerful moment comes when he explains that at ArtsEd, people knew that 'I'm fine' rarely meant 'I'm fine'. An uplifting, thought-provoking conversation about what happens when we stop trying to make people fit the system and start creating systems that let people thrive. A must-listen for parents, educators, leaders, employers and anyone who wants to understand what it really means to create belonging. Connect with Adrian: https://www.linkedin.com/in/adrian-blake-5bb06560/ EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup, founded by Jayne Ellis who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. Subscribe, share and leave a review to help more caring professionals find us. To be a guest, or just to say hello, reach us at info@eftraining.co.uk Learn more about Jayne Ellis and our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience training at http://eftraining.co.uk This podcast is for education and support only and is not a substitute for professional mental health care. If you are struggling, please contact a qualified professional or your GP. Views expressed by guests are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open, honest conversation.

  8. Sep 16

    #23 Charlotte Evans from Nurse to Coach: Burnout, Self-Care & Saying “I’m Not Fine”

    Jayne Ellis on I'm Fine - The Truth Behind the Smile welcomes nurse and clinical coach Charlotte Evans for an honest and inspiring conversation about career change, caring for others, burnout and what happens when saying 'I'm fine' becomes a way of hiding how we really feel. Charlotte shares her career journey from nursing in Switzerland and pharmaceutical market research to becoming an entrepreneur, running a home care business and eventually returning to healthcare, discovering along the way that her caring nature could be used in many ways and that being a nurse didn't have to define her entire career. Now working as a clinical coach, she supports patients to better self-manage their health, navigate barriers within the healthcare system, build confidence and take action, and explains why simply listening and making someone feel heard can matter as much as practical guidance. She also opens up about the emotional toll of caring for others, and the pressure healthcare and social care professionals put on themselves to be strong, resilient and dependable, made even harder when working remotely. Charlotte shares her own experience of burnout, including the physical symptoms she had before recognising what was really happening. A book from her sister, Healing Back Pain: The Mind-Body Connection by John Sarno, helped her understand the link between stress and physical symptoms and became a turning point in how she viewed vulnerability. Together, Jayne and Charlotte explore why healthcare professionals can find it so difficult to ask for help, why we don't want to be seen as the person who isn't coping, and why being vulnerable isn't a weakness; it can be a source of strength. Charlotte also shares how she looks after herself now, including reading, yoga, guided meditation and personal growth. Her advice for anyone entering a caring profession is simple but powerful: notice how you're feeling, find the words to describe it, don't mask it and be true to yourself. A powerful reminder that the people who spend their lives caring for others need to care for themselves too, and that there is only one you, so be you. Connect with Charlotte: https://www.linkedin.com/in/charlotte-evans-575a1029/ Guided Meditation App: https://apps.apple.com/gb/app/yoga-with-lisa/id6587581227 EF training exists because nobody should have to pour from an empty cup. Founded by Jayne Ellis, who learnt the hard way so you don't have to. If today's conversation resonated with you, please subscribe, share and leave a review - it helps more professionals who care find this community. If you or someone you know would like to join the conversation and be a guest on our podcast, please get in touch. Connect with us at info@eftraining.co.uk Visit us at http://eftraining.co.uk for more information about Jayne Ellis and learn about our Compassion Fatigue and Emotional Resilience Training for Organisations and Individuals. Please note: This podcast is intended for education and supportive purposes only and is not a substitute for professional mental health support. If you are struggling, please reach out to a qualified professional or contact your GP. The views and opinions expressed by guests on this podcast are their own and do not necessarily reflect the views, values or position of EF training Ltd. Guest content is shared in the spirit of open conversation, learning and intended as a safe space for honest dialogue.

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Exploring why caring people struggle to care for themselves and why we say "I'm fine" when we are not. Through expert conversations, the podcast supports listeners in overcoming compassion fatigue and rebuilding resilience. 

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