Cry Harder Podcast

Chris Black
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  • Comedy
  • Updated Weekly

Welcome to Cry Harder, where we turn life’s absolute disasters into premium content. I’m Chris Black: husband, girl-dad to a chaotic 4-year-old, and your host for this sarcastic deep dive into the unhinged saga of my life. Expect unsolicited advice, questionable choices, and the kind of oversharing my therapist warned me about. Grab your tissues and let’s make it worse. New episodes every Saturday!

  1. 1d ago

    Philly Cheesesteak Fraud, Phone Zombies & Blind Wine Chaos (Ep. 21)

    Chris Black is back with another beautifully unhinged episode of the Cry Harder Podcast. This week:• Chris declares war on tourist-trap Philly cheesesteaks• A full rant about bands making the crowd sing instead of performing• Phone zombies blocking sidewalks officially enter the Tear Factor Hall of Shame• A debate over texting vs calling turns into a relationship boundary discussion• Chris’s wife Abbie joins the show for a blind Cabernet Sauvignon taste test featuring Kirkland, Robert Mondavi, and Daou• Reviews of Netflix’s The Crash, Jack Ryan: Ghost War, and the surprisingly watchable rom-com Love Accidentally• Relationship advice involving mismatched sex drives in marriage• A chaotic week featuring preschool graduation, Santee concerts, rude water ice vendors, and Buffalo Wild Wings during Game 7• Plus: upcoming St. Thomas trip planning, San Diego summer plans, and more complaining about modern society If you thought today was a disaster, just wait until next week. New episodes every Saturday. #CryHarderPodcast #ComedyPodcast #MovieReviews #WineTasting #Rants #Relationships

    1h 5m

  2. May 30

    Do 75% of People Want Kids Banned From Restaurants? (Ep. 20)

    Chris Black is back for Episode 20 of the Cry Harder Podcast with a jam-packed show! This week, Chris tackles the internet "hall monitors" who love to miss the point of his videos just to correct his spelling or pronunciation. He also breaks down a new survey claiming 75% of people want adults-only dining sections in restaurants. Plus: Eye Contact Anxiety: Why is everyone avoiding eye contact lately?Tear Factor: Grading the internet's best rants, from birds chirping too early to Walmart checkout rules.Movie Reviews: Honest takes on Remarkably Bright Creatures (yes, Chris cried), The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare, and why The Super Mario Galaxy Movie might be too intense for your toddlers.Week in Review: Properly making s'mores, visiting an animal sanctuary, and the ultimate parental nightmare—losing his daughter's favorite stuffed giraffe.If you thought today was a disaster, just wait. Next Saturday, we find a whole new bottom to hit.

    1h 4m

  3. May 23

    19. Room Temp Rosé & The "Tear Factor"

    Chris is back for an enormous Episode 19 of the Cry Harder Podcast! First up, a massive shoutout to our 90 new beautifully unhinged sparks of cosmic stardust who joined the show this week. In this episode, Chris breaks down a literal crime against wine after being served room-temperature rosé at the Padres game—prompting an immediate AI intervention. Then, we dive deep into this week’s "Tear Factor" to dissect the internet's most chaotic Reddit rants, from wild drivers in beat-up cars to automatically playing horror movie ads. Plus, a brutal round of movie and show reviews covering the sheer stupidity of Emily in Paris, the completely unnatural dialogue in Netflix's you, Always , and why I Give It a Year will straight-up cause a divorce. Finally, Chris recaps a hectic week of San Diego dad life, including a wardrobe war over a "Beat LA" t-shirt, a dance party at Santee Lakes, and a highly questionable attempt to explain the history of Pearl Harbor to a four-year-old. Stick around for the Tip of the Week on how to beat the Petco Park stadium traffic at Altitude Sky Lounge, and a preview of escaping a kids' weekend party for Alpine Brewery. Cheer up, things can always get worse. Find out how next Saturday.#CryHarder #Podcast #Padres #SanDiego #DadLife #ParentingHumor #EmilyInParis #MovieReviews #PopCulture #ComedyPodcast #RedditRants #Always2025 #IGiveItAYear

    1h 5m

  4. May 15

    18: Costco Exit Etiquette, Petco Park Rant, & Reddit Icks

    Mike from Philly joins the pod for a special, high-voltage Rant Special! The guys are tackling everything from broken retail logic to administrative nightmares.On this week's itinerary: The Tear Factor: Mike fires back at last week's submissions, exposing greedy corporations, $9 coffees, mean Redditors, and the truth about mermaid diets.Mike's Meltdowns: Why does everyone form a single-file line to show their receipt at the Costco exit? Plus, crucial updates on proper bathroom etiquette.Chris's Chaos: How a Nick Castellanos home run at Petco Park turned Mother's Day into a hot-sun transit disaster, and a brutal six-week saga dealing with public school administration ghosting.The Ultimate Ick: Chris and Mike react to a viral Reddit post where a listener contemplates breaking up with her boyfriend after catching him wildly chasing streamer IShowSpeed on a live stream.Outro: Cheer up, things can always get worse. Find out how next Saturday.📢 WE WANT YOUR RANTS!Did someone give you the ultimate ick? Is a local business charging you way too much for daily essentials? Leave a review, drop a comment on Spotify, or message us to get your submission featured on next week's Tear Factor.👉 Don't forget to follow, rate 5 stars, and share this episode with someone who loves a good meltdown!#CryHarderPodcast #Costco #PetcoPark #Padres #IShowSpeed #TheIck #RedditRants #NickCastellanos #PodcastRants #TearFactor

    1 hr

  5. May 8

    17. UFO Disclosure & The Tijuana Sewage Crisis

    Chris Black is back for Episode 17 of Cry Harder! Today we’re breaking down the Pentagon’s latest UFO/UAP file release and the "Poo-nami" sewage crisis threatening US beaches. Chris also reviews the new movie Regretting You (starring Allison Williams and Mckenna Grace), ranks this week's wildest internet rants on the "Tear Factor" scale, and gives you a crucial tip for staying in the shade during day games at the Padres vs. Cardinals matchup this weekend.#CryHarderPodcast #UFOs #UAP #TijuanaSewageCrisis #RegrettingYouMovie #Padres #Cardinals #MothersDay #ColleenHoover #PodcastLife 0:00 – Welcome to Episode 171:45 – Stories of the Week: UFOs and Tijuana Sewage16:21 – Rant of the Week & Tear Factor Refresher46:10 – Week in Review: Spring Cleaning & Costco Sundays47:33 – Looking Forward: Mother’s Day & Padres vs. Cardinals50:11 – Movie Reviews: Regretting You & A Country Romance1:01:26 – Final Thoughts & Outro

    1h 3m

  6. May 1

    16. Bathroom Cleaners, Amish Volleyball, & The New Tear Factor

    Chris Black is back for an After Hours special. Grab a drink—Chris has his Maker’s and Diet ready—and settle in for Episode 16. Recorded late on Thursday, April 30th, this episode skips the small talk and gets straight into the rants, the reviews, and a brand-new segment. In this episode: Rant of the Week: The workplace bathroom struggle. Why do cleaners always start shouting into the stall the second you sit down? It’s supposed to be a relaxing break, but it quickly becomes a high-stress standoff.The Debut of "Tear Factor": Chris introduces the new rating scale for your rants. From "Based" (10) to "Cry Harder" (1), we’re judging whether your problems are legitimate or if you’re just "doing too much." This week: a sleeping spouse and the general rudeness of Reddit.Week in Review: Lakeside parades and a successful birthday party for Bexley, plus a shoutout to Hopnonymous in Kearny Mesa.Tip of the Week: A simple tech trick to find that song stuck in your head using nothing but your humming and YouTube.Movie Reviews:Odd Man Rush (2020): A Swedish hockey journey that was "OK" but ultimately a bit of a letdown.Plus One At an Amish Wedding (2022): A deep dive into Amish family drama and the shocking discovery that volleyball is actually a huge deal in the community.

    1h 3m

  7. Apr 25

    15. Why Do Kids Sleep Sideways? (And Other Ways I’m Losing)

    Why Do Kids Sleep Sideways? (The Bed Takeover Rant) I’m back. I’m Chris Black, and you’re listening to the Cry Harder Podcast. We are hitting Episode 15 with a question that every parent has asked at 3:00 AM while clinging to the edge of the mattress: Why do small children sleep horizontally? I’m diving into the "sideways sleeper" phenomenon and how my daughter has officially mastered the art of knocking me off my own bed. We’re also getting into the great tipping debate of 2024. After last week's episode, TikTok is divided—you’re either a 25%-or-more tipper or you don’t tip at all. Where did the 20%ers go? In this episode: The Legend of Bob Dylan: I’m talking about the reality of seeing an icon live. Let’s be honest: he’s old and the voice isn't what it used to be—but is that even the point? Sometimes you go for the experience and the "I was there" factor, not for a phenomenal vocal performance.The "Vrabel Situation": Breaking down the latest photos and headlines involving Mike Vrabel and Dianna Russini.Philly Sports Round-Up: The Flyers are looking solid, and the Sixers just grabbed a massive win in Boston. Plus, my thoughts on VJ Edgecombe and why the Eagles’ draft of Michai Lemon has my daughter Bexley very confused (she’s officially on the record: she doesn’t like lemons).Podcast Updates: I’ve officially launched three new playlists to help you find the content you want: Long Form, Shorts, and the CryHarderIRL series.The Week in Review: A quick recap of my time at the Rodeo and a look ahead to Bexley’s upcoming party.Finance Tip of the Week: Can you actually become a millionaire by investing just $10 a day in Bitcoin? I’m looking into whether this "friend of a friend" success story actually holds water.Outro: If your life wasn’t a total disaster this week, don’t worry—there’s always next Saturday. Connect with the show: Check out the new playlists on Spotify and join the conversation on TikTok. If you’ve been kicked out of bed by a horizontal toddler this week, this episode is for you.

    1h 16m

  8. Apr 18

    14. Cattle Ranches, Corporate Pasta, and the Bath Bomb Hoax

    Recording live (and unfortunately nasally) from the family cattle ranch in Red Bluff, Chris Black is powering through a head cold to bring you the premium complaints you deserve. In this episode, Chris tackles the psychological warfare of double-lane drive-thrus, the absolute disaster of Bexley’s DIY haircut, and why he’s officially done gatekeeping the "phenomenal" experience that is Olive Garden. Plus, we launch a brand new segment, Question of the Week, weighing the life choices of janitors vs. bathroom attendants. Inside this episode: Rant of the Week: Why the "other" fast-food lane is always faster and why it’s a personal attack.The Week in Review: Bexley’s birthday, the haircut from hell, and a defense of corporate chain dining.Looking Forward: Rodeo season is upon us.Movie Reviews: A double feature of Amazon Prime’s finest. Chris attempts to hate-watch Modern Persuasion (it’s giving "Emily in Brooklyn") and gets bamboozled by Love, Bubbles and Crystal Cove—which, despite the title, is about bath bombs, not champagne.Tip of the Week: A definitive guide to U.S. tipping etiquette so you can stop being a cheapskate.Chris also pitches a revolutionary film concept: What if we just fired the leads halfway through and let the hotter side characters take over? Cry Harder. New episodes every Saturday (even when sick).

    41 min
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About

Welcome to Cry Harder, where we turn life’s absolute disasters into premium content. I’m Chris Black: husband, girl-dad to a chaotic 4-year-old, and your host for this sarcastic deep dive into the unhinged saga of my life. Expect unsolicited advice, questionable choices, and the kind of oversharing my therapist warned me about. Grab your tissues and let’s make it worse. New episodes every Saturday!

Information

  • Creator
    Chris Black
  • Years Active
    2K
  • Episodes
    21
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Chris Black
  • Show Website
    Cry Harder Podcast