NiCole's Notes

Nicole Zeller
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NiCole's Notes: The study guide for clear thinking about messy things.  Witty, rigorous analysis of everything that matters: politics, love, illness, friendship, technology, aging, and the contradictions we live with. Sarcastic scholarship for the thinking Gen-X mind.  Smart when it matters and Witty always.  A graduate of the University of Calgary, B.A. Political Science '95, B.A.Spanish '08, born with cystic fibrosis, a lung disease that has been trying to kill me since birth. Hanging on to life by the horns with only 26% lung function.  I have 20+ years of experience building organizations and understanding how systems actually work. Founder of the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis, raising 3.5+ million dollars for local research; Philanthropist of the Year for Alberta in 2014; honoured with the naming of a research lab at the Cumming School of Medicine, Snyder Institute for Chronic Diseases, at the University of Calgary in 2013.  Featured in a documentary about my journey with CF and being a CrossFit athlete, while owning my own gym in 2018. I was part of a $ 350 million fundraising campaign and had a 50' banner of my mug hanging off Foothills Hospital for 4 years (2003-2007). I am deep into my journey to finding my true self. I am attempting to integrate my conscious and unconscious to allow my authentic self to emerge. See Carl Jung's theory about individuation. I write about how I am doing it on my website: www.cokeontherocks.ca, so go see me there for some tips. Just graduated with a professional certification in Graphic Design  (June 15, 2026) and am working on another in Integrated Digital Media (graduating May 2027); my friends would consider me the Sassy Smurf of the group.  I may have been given a cactus, but I don't have to sit on it.

  1. 1d ago

    When an Invader Steals Your Life From You.

    Send us Fan Mail I was good at sports. Genuinely, legitimately good. Gymnastics. Swimming. Basketball, which I loved; I travelled for and played in championships. Beach volleyball. I wasn’t just participating. I was winning. I was the athlete other people wanted on their team. And then CF made that part of me disappear. For about ten years, CF was barely a character in my life. I could almost pretend I was normal. I had sovereignty. I had a body that obeyed me. Then, around my third year of university, my weight dropped. My body spiralled. The runs I used to take, the ones I hated then but would trade everything for now, those stopped. It’s 2026, and I have 26% lung function. A hill is Mt. Everest. A staircase is rock climbing. I walk with friends, and they’re ten paces ahead of me. I have to announce my inadequacy so we can synchronize to my broken pace. I used to dream about rec league basketball in my 30s and 40s. I pictured road trips with friends. Travel. Camaraderie. Then I got my transplant evaluation and realized a double lung transplant is Russian roulette. The surgery could kill me. The recovery is brutal. Rejection is always lurking. So I’m not getting the transplant that might give me my body back. I’m 54 years old, and I’m dying as I am, and that is devastating. This episode is about the grief I’ve been holding, the anger I’m finally allowing, and how both the gratitude for my life AND the heartbreak for the life I didn’t get to live can be true at the same time. Nicole’s Notes—where I’m finally dropping the mask and telling you what’s really true. About Nicole's Notes Nicole's Notes is where I'm finally dropping the mask. Each episode explores the messy stuff. Living with cystic fibrosis at 26% lung function, leaning into Carl Jung's shadow work and individuation, marriage and divorce, the documentary that made me viral, the price of inspiration, and what it means to live instead of survive. This podcast is for anyone wanting to find yourself. It is unapologetic, uncompromising, and often unfiltered. About Nicole Zeller I'm a writer, speaker, and podcaster exploring geopolitics, hypocrisy, life, love, chronic illness, grief, and what happens when you finally stop being the person everyone needs you to be. I founded the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis and raised $3.5 million. I have a research lab named in my honour at the University of Calgary's Cumming School of Medicine: the Nicole Perkins Microbial Communities Core Labs. I founded and sold Chinook CrossFit. I was featured in the 2017 Telus TV documentary "Fighting for Breath." Now I'm building a platform where I tell the truth, even when the truth is messy, complicated, and doesn't fit the narrative. Some call me the truth yoda with no filter. Find Me Read my essays at cokeontherocks.caListen to Nicole's Notes on Buzzsprout, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platformsFollow @cokeontherocks19 on Instagram and ThreadsConnect at 19roses72@gmail.comThe...

  2. Oct 11

    Miracle Series: Fighting For Breath on TV

    Send us Fan Mail In 2016, filmmaker Laura O’Grady reached out after reading about me in Impact magazine. She wanted to make a documentary. Side-by-side footage: my CrossFit life and my real CF life. Each week of the five-week Open, she’d film me competing, then cut to the truth—the coughing, the pounding, the transplant list interviews, the clinic visits. When it launched in July 2017, it went viral on the biggest platform in the fitness world. But that was just the beginning. Telus TV funded the project through their Storyline program. They promoted it on cable networks across Canada. Suddenly, my aunt in Prince George texted me—she’d seen a clip on CNN. People across Alberta, Saskatchewan, and BC were texting me that they’d seen me on their screens. The documentary opened doors. It gave me credibility, a platform, a different audience for my fundraising. We raised $40,000 over four years with the Burpees for Breath challenge. But it also trapped me in a narrative I couldn’t escape. When you become the inspiration, you become trapped in the miracle. You can’t admit you’re struggling. You can’t tell the truth. You have to keep producing the miracle for everyone else. This is Episode 8: The story of how a documentary that was supposed to show my truth became the thing that buried it deeper. Nicole’s Notes—where I’m finally dropping the mask and telling you what’s really true. About Nicole's Notes Nicole's Notes is where I'm finally dropping the mask. Each episode explores the messy stuff. Living with cystic fibrosis at 26% lung function, leaning into Carl Jung's shadow work and individuation, marriage and divorce, the documentary that made me viral, the price of inspiration, and what it means to live instead of survive. This podcast is for anyone wanting to find yourself. It is unapologetic, uncompromising, and often unfiltered. About Nicole Zeller I'm a writer, speaker, and podcaster exploring geopolitics, hypocrisy, life, love, chronic illness, grief, and what happens when you finally stop being the person everyone needs you to be. I founded the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis and raised $3.5 million. I have a research lab named in my honour at the University of Calgary's Cumming School of Medicine: the Nicole Perkins Microbial Communities Core Labs. I founded and sold Chinook CrossFit. I was featured in the 2017 Telus TV documentary "Fighting for Breath." Now I'm building a platform where I tell the truth, even when the truth is messy, complicated, and doesn't fit the narrative. Some call me the truth yoda with no filter. Find Me Read my essays at cokeontherocks.caListen to Nicole's Notes on Buzzsprout, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platformsFollow @cokeontherocks19 on Instagram and ThreadsConnect at 19roses72@gmail.comThe...

  3. Sep 25

    Miracle Series: Marriage & Divorce-The Duality of Reality

    Send us Fan Mail When you're living your most public life—keynoting in front of CEOs, your face on 50-foot hospital banners, raising millions for your foundation—who sees you disappearing at home? This is the story of the duality. Of building a public persona as the inspirational CF patient while your marriage quietly dies. Of performing health and strength while your lungs decline. Oxygen is the moment when hiding became impossible. Nicole Zeller talks about 25 years of marriage, the shift from support to resentment, and what it takes to let someone go finally. About the galas where she was celebrated while feeling invisible to the one person who was supposed to love her. About the 50-foot banner and the man who couldn't accept what she refused to hide anymore. This episode explores what happens when you stop performing for someone who resents your refusal to disappear. Content warnings: Medical trauma, marriage dissolution, caregiver burden About Nicole's Notes Nicole's Notes is where I'm finally dropping the mask. Each episode explores the messy stuff. Living with cystic fibrosis at 26% lung function, leaning into Carl Jung's shadow work and individuation, marriage and divorce, the documentary that made me viral, the price of inspiration, and what it means to live instead of survive. This podcast is for anyone wanting to find yourself. It is unapologetic, uncompromising, and often unfiltered. About Nicole Zeller I'm a writer, speaker, and podcaster exploring geopolitics, hypocrisy, life, love, chronic illness, grief, and what happens when you finally stop being the person everyone needs you to be. I founded the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis and raised $3.5 million. I have a research lab named in my honour at the University of Calgary's Cumming School of Medicine: the Nicole Perkins Microbial Communities Core Labs. I founded and sold Chinook CrossFit. I was featured in the 2017 Telus TV documentary "Fighting for Breath." Now I'm building a platform where I tell the truth, even when the truth is messy, complicated, and doesn't fit the narrative. Some call me the truth yoda with no filter. Find Me Read my essays at cokeontherocks.caListen to Nicole's Notes on Buzzsprout, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platformsFollow @cokeontherocks19 on Instagram and ThreadsConnect at 19roses72@gmail.comThe...

  4. Sep 4

    Miracle Series: The Comeback Redemption Arc

    Send us Fan Mail  Episode 6: I weighed 74 pounds at my wedding. Ten years later, the University of Calgary named a research lab after me. This is how I went from surviving on a feeding tube to raising millions for CF research and discovering that my survival meant something bigger. This episode is the story of redemption. Not because I'm special. But because I refused to die on someone else's timeline. From small wins in weight gain to speaking at CF conventions. From pitching my story to CEOs to starting the Summit Foundation. From galas to a research lab bearing my name. About Nicole's Notes Nicole's Notes is where I'm finally dropping the mask. Each episode explores the messy stuff. Living with cystic fibrosis at 26% lung function, leaning into Carl Jung's shadow work and individuation, marriage and divorce, the documentary that made me viral, the price of inspiration, and what it means to live instead of survive. This podcast is for anyone wanting to find yourself. It is unapologetic, uncompromising, and often unfiltered. About Nicole Zeller I'm a writer, speaker, and podcaster exploring geopolitics, hypocrisy, life, love, chronic illness, grief, and what happens when you finally stop being the person everyone needs you to be. I founded the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis and raised $3.5 million. I have a research lab named in my honour at the University of Calgary's Cumming School of Medicine: the Nicole Perkins Microbial Communities Core Labs. I founded and sold Chinook CrossFit. I was featured in the 2017 Telus TV documentary "Fighting for Breath." Now I'm building a platform where I tell the truth, even when the truth is messy, complicated, and doesn't fit the narrative. Some call me the truth yoda with no filter. Find Me Read my essays at cokeontherocks.caListen to Nicole's Notes on Buzzsprout, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platformsFollow @cokeontherocks19 on Instagram and ThreadsConnect at 19roses72@gmail.comThe...

  5. Aug 24

    Miracle Series: The Feeding Tube From Hell

    Send us Fan Mail 46 pounds lost in 7 years. 74 lbs at wedding. Surgery 6 weeks before marriage. "You'll die without this tube." Walking down the aisle as a skeleton. About Nicole's Notes Nicole's Notes is where I'm finally dropping the mask. Each episode explores the messy stuff. Living with cystic fibrosis at 26% lung function, leaning into Carl Jung's shadow work and individuation, marriage and divorce, the documentary that made me viral, the price of inspiration, and what it means to live instead of survive. This podcast is for anyone wanting to find yourself. It is unapologetic, uncompromising, and often unfiltered. About Nicole Zeller I'm a writer, speaker, and podcaster exploring geopolitics, hypocrisy, life, love, chronic illness, grief, and what happens when you finally stop being the person everyone needs you to be. I founded the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis and raised $3.5 million. I have a research lab named in my honour at the University of Calgary's Cumming School of Medicine: the Nicole Perkins Microbial Communities Core Labs. I founded and sold Chinook CrossFit. I was featured in the 2017 Telus TV documentary "Fighting for Breath." Now I'm building a platform where I tell the truth, even when the truth is messy, complicated, and doesn't fit the narrative. Some call me the truth yoda with no filter. Find Me Read my essays at cokeontherocks.caListen to Nicole's Notes on Buzzsprout, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platformsFollow @cokeontherocks19 on Instagram and ThreadsConnect at 19roses72@gmail.comThe...

  6. Aug 19

    Miracle Series: When I Closed My Eyes

    Send us Fan Mail Trigger Warning: Medical trauma, childhood fear, anxiety, hypervigilance What happens to a child's mind when doctors and nurses repeatedly invade their body and sleep without consent? This bonus episode bridges The Exacerbation and The Feeding Tube. It's the story of what I didn't talk about in the main series: the bat under my bed, the nightly combat planning, the terror of closed eyes, and how I learned to sneak undetected into my parents' room just to feel safe. For years, I couldn't understand why I was so hypervigilant. Why I couldn't relax. Why I refused help even when I was dying. Now, at 54, I understand: the hospital trained me to be afraid. And I've spent my whole life carrying the bat in different forms. This is the episode about how medical trauma creates survival strategies that both save you and destroy you. It's dark. It's vulnerable. And it's the key to understanding everything that comes after. About Nicole's Notes Nicole's Notes is where I'm finally dropping the mask. Each episode explores the messy stuff. Living with cystic fibrosis at 26% lung function, leaning into Carl Jung's shadow work and individuation, marriage and divorce, the documentary that made me viral, the price of inspiration, and what it means to live instead of survive. This podcast is for anyone wanting to find yourself. It is unapologetic, uncompromising, and often unfiltered. About Nicole Zeller I'm a writer, speaker, and podcaster exploring geopolitics, hypocrisy, life, love, chronic illness, grief, and what happens when you finally stop being the person everyone needs you to be. I founded the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis and raised $3.5 million. I have a research lab named in my honour at the University of Calgary's Cumming School of Medicine: the Nicole Perkins Microbial Communities Core Labs. I founded and sold Chinook CrossFit. I was featured in the 2017 Telus TV documentary "Fighting for Breath." Now I'm building a platform where I tell the truth, even when the truth is messy, complicated, and doesn't fit the narrative. Some call me the truth yoda with no filter. Find Me Read my essays at cokeontherocks.caListen to Nicole's Notes on Buzzsprout, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platformsFollow @cokeontherocks19 on Instagram and ThreadsConnect at 19roses72@gmail.comThe...

  7. Aug 12

    Miracle Series: The Exacerbation- When the Glass Cracks

    Send us Fan Mail This is the story of a 22-year-old who thought she was invincible. Who had survived 10 years of hiding CF. Who had proven to the world that her disease didn't define her. And then her lungs decided to call her bluff. The hamster wheel was brutal: Thursday, Friday, Saturday: out until 2-3 a.m., drinking to blackout, not eatingSunday: sleep all day, try to eat, try to catch up on homeworkWeekdays: slogging across campus to 8 a.m. classes (which she skipped), working 2-6 p.m. at a data entry job, studying in residence until lateAll while her lungs were in decline. About Nicole's Notes Nicole's Notes is where I'm finally dropping the mask. Each episode explores the messy stuff. Living with cystic fibrosis at 26% lung function, leaning into Carl Jung's shadow work and individuation, marriage and divorce, the documentary that made me viral, the price of inspiration, and what it means to live instead of survive. This podcast is for anyone wanting to find yourself. It is unapologetic, uncompromising, and often unfiltered. About Nicole Zeller I'm a writer, speaker, and podcaster exploring geopolitics, hypocrisy, life, love, chronic illness, grief, and what happens when you finally stop being the person everyone needs you to be. I founded the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis and raised $3.5 million. I have a research lab named in my honour at the University of Calgary's Cumming School of Medicine: the Nicole Perkins Microbial Communities Core Labs. I founded and sold Chinook CrossFit. I was featured in the 2017 Telus TV documentary "Fighting for Breath." Now I'm building a platform where I tell the truth, even when the truth is messy, complicated, and doesn't fit the narrative. Some call me the truth yoda with no filter. Find Me Read my essays at cokeontherocks.caListen to Nicole's Notes on Buzzsprout, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platformsFollow @cokeontherocks19 on Instagram and ThreadsConnect at 19roses72@gmail.comThe...

  8. Aug 7

    Miracle Series: Master of Invisibility and Learning to Lie

    Send us Fan Mail This is episode 3 of 9.  At age 9, something shifted. Nicole joined the swimming team. And for the next 10 years, she became a master of performance. The world saw a varsity captain, a provincial athlete, a girl with no limitations. What they didn't see was the demon, hard and fast, every single day. How did she not collapse? A fantastic appetite. Sleeping constantly. Napping between every activity. The only way to perform invincibility is to rest when nobody's watching. By the fourth year, the performance was cracking. She was coughing up mucus into cups. Dumping them down toilets. Her exercise tolerance is becoming nonexistent. The masterpiece of invisibility was starting to shatter. This episode explores the invisible reality of living with CF while appearing invincible.  About Nicole's Notes Nicole's Notes is where I'm finally dropping the mask. Each episode explores the messy stuff. Living with cystic fibrosis at 26% lung function, leaning into Carl Jung's shadow work and individuation, marriage and divorce, the documentary that made me viral, the price of inspiration, and what it means to live instead of survive. This podcast is for anyone wanting to find yourself. It is unapologetic, uncompromising, and often unfiltered. About Nicole Zeller I'm a writer, speaker, and podcaster exploring geopolitics, hypocrisy, life, love, chronic illness, grief, and what happens when you finally stop being the person everyone needs you to be. I founded the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis and raised $3.5 million. I have a research lab named in my honour at the University of Calgary's Cumming School of Medicine: the Nicole Perkins Microbial Communities Core Labs. I founded and sold Chinook CrossFit. I was featured in the 2017 Telus TV documentary "Fighting for Breath." Now I'm building a platform where I tell the truth, even when the truth is messy, complicated, and doesn't fit the narrative. Some call me the truth yoda with no filter. Find Me Read my essays at cokeontherocks.caListen to Nicole's Notes on Buzzsprout, Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and all major platformsFollow @cokeontherocks19 on Instagram and ThreadsConnect at 19roses72@gmail.comThe...

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About

NiCole's Notes: The study guide for clear thinking about messy things.  Witty, rigorous analysis of everything that matters: politics, love, illness, friendship, technology, aging, and the contradictions we live with. Sarcastic scholarship for the thinking Gen-X mind.  Smart when it matters and Witty always.  A graduate of the University of Calgary, B.A. Political Science '95, B.A.Spanish '08, born with cystic fibrosis, a lung disease that has been trying to kill me since birth. Hanging on to life by the horns with only 26% lung function.  I have 20+ years of experience building organizations and understanding how systems actually work. Founder of the Summit Foundation for Cystic Fibrosis, raising 3.5+ million dollars for local research; Philanthropist of the Year for Alberta in 2014; honoured with the naming of a research lab at the Cumming School of Medicine, Snyder Institute for Chronic Diseases, at the University of Calgary in 2013.  Featured in a documentary about my journey with CF and being a CrossFit athlete, while owning my own gym in 2018. I was part of a $ 350 million fundraising campaign and had a 50' banner of my mug hanging off Foothills Hospital for 4 years (2003-2007). I am deep into my journey to finding my true self. I am attempting to integrate my conscious and unconscious to allow my authentic self to emerge. See Carl Jung's theory about individuation. I write about how I am doing it on my website: www.cokeontherocks.ca, so go see me there for some tips. Just graduated with a professional certification in Graphic Design  (June 15, 2026) and am working on another in Integrated Digital Media (graduating May 2027); my friends would consider me the Sassy Smurf of the group.  I may have been given a cactus, but I don't have to sit on it.

Information

  • Creator
    Nicole Zeller
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    30
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 NiCole's Notes
  • Show Website
    NiCole's Notes