This Is Insanity

Jonathan Solomon
  • 5.0 (1)
  • Christianity
  • Updated Biweekly

Some albums are made to be heard. This one was made to be survived and felt. This Is Insanity is a 17-episode limited series where Jonathan Solomon goes track by track through his album “Allegory Of Insanity” — unpacking the faith, the tension, and the internal war that made each song necessary. The album is about being a Christian who struggles with sexual attraction. The podcast is about everything that didn't fit in the lyrics. No easy answers. Just one person's honest conversation with God, with himself, and now — with you. New episodes dropping twice a week.

  1. Jul 27

    Man Of My Dreams Pt. 2 (with Yana Jenay and Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Man of My Dreams” — a song about the deepest longing behind every romantic longing. Whether we realize it or not, we often ask romance to do more than it was ever created to do. We hope another person will complete us, heal us, quiet our loneliness, and finally make us feel at home. But even the healthiest marriage was never designed to bear that kind of weight. This episode explores the surprising truth that our desire for perfect love ultimately points beyond human relationships. It points to Christ. For someone wrestling with same-sex attraction, that realization carries a unique weight. The question isn't simply whether certain desires should be pursued, but whether any romantic relationship—regardless of who it's with—can ultimately satisfy the deepest ache of the human heart. “Man of My Dreams” isn't a rejection of romance. It's a reordering of it. It's about seeing Jesus as the One every love story ultimately echoes. The One who knows us completely, loves us perfectly, and fulfills us more deeply than any earthly relationship ever could. Join us as we discuss love, longing, singleness, marriage, and why the greatest romance in the Christian story isn't between two people—it's between Christ and His redeemed people. When He becomes our greatest treasure, every other gift finds its proper place.

  2. Jul 24

    Man Of My Dreams Pt. 1 (with Yana Jenay and Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Man of My Dreams” — a song about the deepest longing behind every romantic longing. Whether we realize it or not, we often ask romance to do more than it was ever created to do. We hope another person will complete us, heal us, quiet our loneliness, and finally make us feel at home. But even the healthiest marriage was never designed to bear that kind of weight. This episode explores the surprising truth that our desire for perfect love ultimately points beyond human relationships. It points to Christ. For someone wrestling with same-sex attraction, that realization carries a unique weight. The question isn't simply whether certain desires should be pursued, but whether any romantic relationship—regardless of who it's with—can ultimately satisfy the deepest ache of the human heart. “Man of My Dreams” isn't a rejection of romance. It's a reordering of it. It's about seeing Jesus as the One every love story ultimately echoes. The One who knows us completely, loves us perfectly, and fulfills us more deeply than any earthly relationship ever could. Join us as we discuss love, longing, singleness, marriage, and why the greatest romance in the Christian story isn't between two people—it's between Christ and His redeemed people. When He becomes our greatest treasure, every other gift finds its proper place.

  3. Jul 21

    Jonathan's Song (with Dustin Atchley and Cammie Hodge)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Jonathan’s Song” — a reflection on biblical friendship, masculinity, and the kinds of love God designed men to experience. In a culture that often assumes deep affection between men must be romantic or sexual, we've forgotten the beauty of covenant friendship. Looking through the relationship of David and Jonathan, this song explores a picture of brotherhood marked by loyalty, vulnerability, sacrifice, and genuine love—without reducing it to something it was never intended to be. From there, the conversation becomes personal. As someone named Jonathan, I began asking what my own life revealed about the kinds of relationships I longed for. How much of what I desired was actually romantic, and how much was a deep hunger for the rich, emotionally present friendships that so many men have never been taught to pursue? This episode wrestles with the ways our culture often leaves men emotionally isolated. We talk about the fear of vulnerability, the pressure to keep relationships surface-level, and how the absence of meaningful male friendship can cause us to look elsewhere for needs God intended to be met within the body of Christ. “Jonathan’s Song” isn't an argument against romance. It's an invitation to recover something many of us have lost: the goodness of brotherhood. Because perhaps one of the enemy's greatest victories has been convincing men that intimacy and friendship cannot exist in the same sentence. Join us as we discuss biblical masculinity, covenant friendship, emotional intimacy, and the surprising freedom that comes when men rediscover the gift of loving one another as brothers in Christ.

  4. Jul 10

    Insanity Pt. 2 (with Cammie Hodge and Hezekiah Cunningham-Bey)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack the title track, “Insanity.” After years of trying to change myself, trying harder, praying more, making promises, failing, and starting over, I began to wonder if I was the crazy one. The cycle felt endless. The definition of insanity is often said to be doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results—and that's exactly how my pursuit of freedom began to feel. But then I realized something that changed everything. The story was never ultimately about how hard I could try. It was about how far Jesus was willing to go for me. This episode explores the shift from self-salvation to grace. From measuring my faithfulness by my performance to resting in Christ's finished work. We talk about the exhaustion of trying to earn peace with God, the hopelessness that comes when our own strength runs out, and the good news that Jesus has never asked us to save ourselves. The question that echoes throughout this song is simple: Who has tried harder than me? And the answer is even simpler: Jesus has. “Insanity” is the turning point of the album. It's the moment where striving gives way to surrender, where despair collides with the gospel, and where the person who thought they had exhausted every possibility discovers that Christ's pursuit has always been greater than their own. Join us as we discuss grace, perseverance, the finished work of Christ, and why the deepest hope of the gospel isn't that we finally become strong enough—but that Jesus already was.

  5. Jul 7

    Insanity Pt. 1 (with Cammie Hodge and Hezekiah Cunningham-Bey)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack the title track, “Insanity.” After years of trying to change myself, trying harder, praying more, making promises, failing, and starting over, I began to wonder if I was the crazy one. The cycle felt endless. The definition of insanity is often said to be doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results—and that's exactly how my pursuit of freedom began to feel. But then I realized something that changed everything. The story was never ultimately about how hard I could try. It was about how far Jesus was willing to go for me. This episode explores the shift from self-salvation to grace. From measuring my faithfulness by my performance to resting in Christ's finished work. We talk about the exhaustion of trying to earn peace with God, the hopelessness that comes when our own strength runs out, and the good news that Jesus has never asked us to save ourselves. The question that echoes throughout this song is simple: Who has tried harder than me? And the answer is even simpler: Jesus has. “Insanity” is the turning point of the album. It's the moment where striving gives way to surrender, where despair collides with the gospel, and where the person who thought they had exhausted every possibility discovers that Christ's pursuit has always been greater than their own. Join us as we discuss grace, perseverance, the finished work of Christ, and why the deepest hope of the gospel isn't that we finally become strong enough—but that Jesus already was.

  6. Jul 3

    Fool's Errand Pt. 2 (with Cammie Hodge and Hezekiah Cunningham-Bey)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Fool’s Errand” — a song about the voices from the past that never seem to stop calling your name. Even after choosing to follow Christ, the past has a way of lingering. Old desires. Old memories. Old ways of thinking. They don't simply disappear; they become like a ghost that follows you, whispering that resistance is pointless, that you're fighting a battle you'll never win, and that you might as well give in. This episode explores the exhausting nature of temptation when it feels less like a single moment and more like a constant companion. We talk about the lies our past tells us, the stories we replay in our minds, and the subtle ways despair can masquerade as realism. “Fool’s Errand” asks a difficult question: What if the greatest battle isn't against temptation itself, but against the belief that faithfulness is a fool's errand? That obedience is wasted effort? That holiness is impossible? Join us as we discuss memory, temptation, perseverance, and the hope that our past may be loud, but it doesn't have the final word. Even when the ghost keeps following, Christ continues to call us forward.

  7. Jun 30

    Fool's Errand Pt. 1 (with Cammie Hodge and Hezekiah Cunningham-Bey)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Fool’s Errand” — a song about the voices from the past that never seem to stop calling your name. Even after choosing to follow Christ, the past has a way of lingering. Old desires. Old memories. Old ways of thinking. They don't simply disappear; they become like a ghost that follows you, whispering that resistance is pointless, that you're fighting a battle you'll never win, and that you might as well give in. This episode explores the exhausting nature of temptation when it feels less like a single moment and more like a constant companion. We talk about the lies our past tells us, the stories we replay in our minds, and the subtle ways despair can masquerade as realism. “Fool’s Errand” asks a difficult question: What if the greatest battle isn't against temptation itself, but against the belief that faithfulness is a fool's errand? That obedience is wasted effort? That holiness is impossible? Join us as we discuss memory, temptation, perseverance, and the hope that our past may be loud, but it doesn't have the final word. Even when the ghost keeps following, Christ continues to call us forward.

  8. Jun 26

    Aint Good Enough Pt. 2 (with Cammie Hodge and Hezekiah Cunningham-Bey)

    In this episode of This Is Insanity, we unpack “Ain’t Good Enough” — the most emotionally vulnerable song on the album. For years, I wondered what would happen if I stopped fighting. If I gave myself permission to pursue everything I had spent so much energy resisting. Would I finally feel free? Would I finally feel understood? Would the ache go away? In this song, I follow that imagination as far as it can go. I imagine getting what I thought I wanted. The relationship. The acceptance. The intimacy. The life I sometimes convinced myself would finally make everything make sense. But at the end of the thought experiment, I find myself confronted by a difficult reality: what if the deepest hunger underneath all of those desires remains untouched? This episode explores the difference between desire and fulfillment. Between getting what we want and finding what we need. It wrestles with the uncomfortable possibility that no person, relationship, achievement, or experience can carry the weight of our deepest longings. “Ain’t Good Enough” is not a song about having all the answers. It's a song about exhausting every fantasy of rescue and finding that the human heart still asks for more. It's about grief, honesty, longing, and the terrifying realization that the thing you've spent years believing would satisfy you might not be enough after all. Join us as we discuss desire, disappointment, identity, and the search for fulfillment that reaches deeper than our strongest longings.

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About

Some albums are made to be heard. This one was made to be survived and felt. This Is Insanity is a 17-episode limited series where Jonathan Solomon goes track by track through his album “Allegory Of Insanity” — unpacking the faith, the tension, and the internal war that made each song necessary. The album is about being a Christian who struggles with sexual attraction. The podcast is about everything that didn't fit in the lyrics. No easy answers. Just one person's honest conversation with God, with himself, and now — with you. New episodes dropping twice a week.

Information

  • Creator
    Jonathan Solomon
  • Years Active
    2026
  • Episodes
    18
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Jonathan Solomon
  • Show Website
    This Is Insanity