HisNHers Unfiltered

Joia & Torrence

His & Hers: Unfiltered is where real relationships meet real conversations. Hosted by husband-and-wife duo Joia and Torrence, this isn't your typical relationship podcast. We're bringing honest, unfiltered discussions about love, marriage, dating, family, money, entrepreneurship, pop culture, and everything in between—without the sugarcoating. Every week, we sit down with a signature cocktail in hand and tackle the conversations everyone is having behind closed doors but few are willing to have out loud. From modern dating struggles and marriage realities to viral relationship debates, Black culture, trending topics, and the challenges of building a life together, no topic is off-limits. Expect bold opinions, healthy disagreements, plenty of laughs, and a fresh perspective from both the male and female point of view. Whether you're single, dating, married, divorced, situationship-ing, or simply trying to make sense of today's relationship landscape, you'll find yourself somewhere in these conversations. Each episode features: 🥂 The Signature Sip – A custom cocktail inspired by the week's topic 🎙️ Straight, No Chaser – Unfiltered discussion on the main topic 🍸 Sip or Tell – A game where honesty is tested and secrets may spill 📱 Y'all Said What? – Listener questions, hot takes, and social media drama ⚖️ The Verdict – Final thoughts and takeaways from both sides At the end of the day, we're not relationship experts—we're just a real married couple sharing our experiences, perspectives, wins, mistakes, and lessons learned along the way. So grab a drink, pull up a chair, and join the conversation. Welcome to His & Hers: Unfiltered—where the conversations are honest, the opinions are bold, and the drinks are always flowing. New episodes weekly. Subscribe and join the family

Episodes

  1. 6d ago

    The Hardest Relationship to Build... Is After Kids

    Nobody warns you how much having kids can change your relationship. You can love your children deeply, become amazing parents... and somewhere between the school schedules, practices, bills, bedtime routines, and exhaustion, realize you've stopped being intentional about each other. In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence get real about what happens to relationships after kids—and why becoming great parents doesn't automatically mean you're still being great partners. They unpack the shift from lovers to co-managers, what happens to intimacy and connection when parenting consumes your energy, and the challenge of remembering who you were before everything became about the kids. The conversation also gets personal as Joia reflects on how single motherhood shaped the way she entered marriage, while Torrence shares the male perspective of dating a single mother, finding his place in an already-established family, and building trust without trying to replace the parent who came before him. Plus, they get into dating with kids, blended families, co-parenting boundaries, discipline, and one question every parent in a relationship should consider: If your child's future relationship looked exactly like yours... would you be proud? This week's Signature Sip is After Hours, their take on a classic Lemon Drop—because after the homework, practices, bedtime routines, and responsibilities are handled, your relationship still deserves your attention. The kids will grow up. The schedules will eventually slow down. The house will get quiet. The question is: Will you still know each other when it does? Grab your Signature Sip and join the conversation. Real. Raw. Unfiltered.

    The Hardest Relationship to Build... Is After Kids
  2. Aug 6

    Strong Black Woman... But At What Cost? (The Conversation We Need to Have)

    Being a Strong Black Woman has never been the problem. For many women, strength wasn't a choice—it was survival. But what happens when the very habits that helped you survive begin to make it harder to trust, receive love, and build a healthy partnership? In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence tackle one of the most honest conversations they've had yet. Joia shares her personal journey from single motherhood and hyper-independence to learning how to trust, receive, and allow her husband to lead. Torrence offers a man's perspective on loving someone who has spent years believing they had to carry everything alone. Together, they explore: • The difference between survival and partnership • Why hyper-independence can quietly sabotage intimacy • The cost of always being "the strong one" • Learning to trust after years of doing everything yourself • What healthy leadership really looks like in a relationship • How our children learn about love by watching us Plus, this week's Signature Sip, The Armor, is a bold whiskey cocktail that reminds us that while armor may protect us, it can also keep the right people out. Whether you're single, dating, married, or healing from past relationships, this conversation is an invitation to ask yourself one question: Is your strength protecting you... or preventing you from experiencing the love you've been praying for? Grab your Signature Sip, join the conversation, and don't forget to subscribe, rate, and share with someone who needs to hear it. The Video will be available at 7pm EST

    Strong Black Woman... But At What Cost? (The Conversation We Need to Have)
  3. Jul 23

    Mind Your Business... Until When!?

    YouTube & Captivate DescriptionEpisode 7: Mind Your Business... Until When? Everyone has heard the phrase "Mind your business." But is there ever a point when staying silent does more harm than speaking up? In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Torrence and Joia tackle one of the most uncomfortable questions in relationships and family dynamics: When is it your place to step in—and when should you stay out of it? From toxic relationships and cheating to abusive situations, enabling loved ones, and knowing when to protect your peace, this conversation explores the blurry line between respecting boundaries and showing up for the people you love. As always, the conversation gets real with honest perspectives, personal experiences, and plenty of accountability. This week's Signature Sip is The Gray Area, a refreshing cocktail inspired by the fact that not every situation is black and white. In This Episode:Does "mind your business" always apply?When should family or friends intervene in a relationship?Are you helping... or enabling?The difference between support and interference.When silence becomes complicity.Our Sip or Tell game.Real listener scenarios in Y'all Said What?!The Verdict: Knowing when to step in—and when to let go. Whether you're single, dating, married, or somewhere in between, this episode will challenge you to think differently about boundaries, accountability, and what it truly means to care about someone. If you enjoyed this conversation, be sure to Like, Comment, Subscribe, and Share with someone who's ever had to decide whether to mind their business... or get involved. Follow us everywhere: Instagram: @HisNHersUnfiltered TikTok: @HisNHersUnfiltered Facebook: HisnHers Unfiltered Join the Conversation at: www.hisnhersunfiltered.com New episodes every Thursday. Love. Culture. Unfiltered Conversation. #Relationships #RelationshipPodcast #BlackLove #DatingAdvice #Marriage #Boundaries #Accountability #Podcast #HisAndHersUnfiltered #BlackPodcast

    Mind Your Business... Until When!?
  4. Jul 16

    Love Isn't Hard, Maybe Loving YOU Is

    In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, we're challenging one of the biggest myths in modern relationships. Too often we blame dating, marriage, or our partners when the real issue may be staring back at us in the mirror. We're talking accountability, emotional maturity, communication, unrealistic expectations, healing from past trauma, and the habits that quietly sabotage healthy relationships. Because sometimes the hardest part of love isn't finding the right person—it's becoming the right partner. 🥂 This week's Signature Sip: The Gray Area—because relationships aren't always black and white. In this episode, we discuss:• Why accountability is so hard in relationships • Signs you might be the difficult partner • Communication vs. constant conflict • Healing before expecting someone else to heal you • How pride, ego, and past experiences affect love • When compromise is healthy—and when it isn't • The difference between being misunderstood and being unwilling to grow • The gray areas that every relationship has to navigate Plus, we dive into Sip & Tell, Y'all Said WHAT?!, and give our unfiltered verdict on whether love is really difficult... or if sometimes, loving us is. 🎙️ Where Black Love, Culture & Conversation Collide. Follow & Connect Instagram: @HisNHersUnfiltered TikTok: @HisNHersUnfiltered YouTube: @HisNHersUnfiltered Facebook: HisnHers Unfiltered Website: www.HisNHersUnfiltered.com #Relationships #Marriage #Dating #BlackLove #Communication #RelationshipAdvice #Accountability #HisAndHersUnfiltered

    Love Isn't Hard, Maybe Loving YOU Is
  5. Jul 9

    At What Point Is It YOUR Fault?

    Everybody wants a healthy relationship—but are you willing to take an honest look at the role you play? In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, we're having the conversation most people avoid: personal accountability. It's easy to blame exes, bad dating experiences, or "all men" or "all women," but at what point do we stop pointing fingers and start looking in the mirror? We're discussing how your communication style, emotional maturity, unresolved trauma, defensiveness, and daily habits can either strengthen your relationships—or slowly destroy them. This episode isn't about blame. It's about growth. In this episode:🥃 Our Signature Sip of the Week 🗣️ Straight, No Chaser: At What Point Is It YOUR Fault? 🎲 Sip or Tell – Our hottest relationship game yet 📢 Y'all Said WHAT?! – We react to your anonymous relationship stories and opinions ⚖️ The Verdict – Our final thoughts and takeaways We discuss:• Why accountability is so hard • Are you repeating the same relationship patterns? • The difference between confidence and defensiveness • How emotional maturity changes relationships • What attracts emotionally healthy partners • Why healing is your responsibility—not your partner's • The habits that quietly sabotage good relationships • How to know when you're the common denominator Whether you're single, dating, engaged, or married, this episode will challenge you to stop asking, "Why does this keep happening to me?" and start asking, "What can I do differently?" Drop your thoughts in the comments: At what point do we have to admit we're part of the problem? If you enjoyed this episode, don't forget to: 👍 Like this video 💬 Join the conversation in the comments 🔔 Subscribe for new episodes every week Follow us everywhere: Instagram: @HisnHersUnfiltered TikTok: @HisnHersUnfiltered Facebook: HisnHers Unfiltered YouTube:@ HisnHersUnfiltered #HisAndHersUnfiltered #RelationshipPodcast #DatingAdvice #Marriage #Relationships #Communication #SelfReflection #EmotionalIntelligence #PersonalGrowth #BlackLove #Dating #Podcast

    At What Point Is It YOUR Fault?
  6. Jul 2

    Would. YOU. Stay?

    Everybody says they'd leave... until it's their relationship. In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, we're putting love, loyalty, and dealbreakers to the ultimate test. We tackle some of the toughest relationship scenarios and ask one simple question: Would. You. Stay? From secret children and infidelity to emotional betrayal, financial struggles, and major life changes, we're debating what deserves a second chance—and what should end a relationship for good. Is cheating always a dealbreaker? Could you forgive a life-changing lie? Does love conquer all, or are some boundaries meant to stay non-negotiable? As always, Joia and Torrence don't always agree... and that's exactly what makes the conversation worth having. In This Episode:Would you stay after infidelity?Is emotional cheating worse than physical cheating?Could a secret child destroy a marriage?Is severe weight gain a dealbreaker?When does forgiveness become settling?Are some lies impossible to recover from?Sip or Tell: Red Flag or Reach 🚩The Verdict: Where do you draw the line? Join the ConversationWould YOU stay? Tell us in the comments or connect with us on social media. We want to hear your take! 📱 Instagram: @HisNHersUnfiltered 🎵 TikTok: @HisNHersUnfiltered ▶️ YouTube: @HisNHersUnfiltered 📘 Facebook: HisnHers Unfiltered 📧 Email: cheers@hisnhersunfiltered.com 🌐 Website: www.hisnhersunfiltered.com If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, rate, and leave a review. It helps us reach more people and continue creating the conversations everyone is thinking—but few are having. Remember… Real. Raw. Unfiltered. Because where his side and her side meet, there's always room for the conversation.

    Would. YOU. Stay?
  7. Jun 18

    Is Marriage Still Worth It?

    Is marriage still worth it in 2026? With divorce rates, changing relationship dynamics, social media influence, and more people choosing to remain single, it's a question many people are asking. In this episode of His & Hers: Unfiltered, Joia and Torrence tackle one of the biggest relationship debates of our generation. From the benefits of partnership and building wealth together to the challenges of communication, commitment, sacrifice, and modern expectations, we're discussing the realities of marriage—the good, the bad, and everything in between. In this episode: • Why fewer people are choosing marriage • The benefits and challenges of married life • Social media's impact on relationship expectations • Traditional vs. modern marriage roles • Financial partnerships and building together • What marriage has taught us personally • Whether marriage is still worth pursuing today Plus, we share our Signature Sip, answer listener questions, and give our final verdict on whether marriage is still a worthwhile commitment in today's world. So what's your take? Is marriage still worth it, or has the institution become outdated? Drop your thoughts in the comments and join the conversation. Follow His & Hers: Unfiltered for weekly conversations on relationships, marriage, culture, entrepreneurship, and everything in between. #HisAndHersUnfiltered #Marriage #Relationships #BlackLove #MarriagePodcast #ModernRelationships #LoveAndMarriage #Couples #RelationshipAdvice #Podcast

    Is Marriage Still Worth It?

About

His & Hers: Unfiltered is where real relationships meet real conversations. Hosted by husband-and-wife duo Joia and Torrence, this isn't your typical relationship podcast. We're bringing honest, unfiltered discussions about love, marriage, dating, family, money, entrepreneurship, pop culture, and everything in between—without the sugarcoating. Every week, we sit down with a signature cocktail in hand and tackle the conversations everyone is having behind closed doors but few are willing to have out loud. From modern dating struggles and marriage realities to viral relationship debates, Black culture, trending topics, and the challenges of building a life together, no topic is off-limits. Expect bold opinions, healthy disagreements, plenty of laughs, and a fresh perspective from both the male and female point of view. Whether you're single, dating, married, divorced, situationship-ing, or simply trying to make sense of today's relationship landscape, you'll find yourself somewhere in these conversations. Each episode features: 🥂 The Signature Sip – A custom cocktail inspired by the week's topic 🎙️ Straight, No Chaser – Unfiltered discussion on the main topic 🍸 Sip or Tell – A game where honesty is tested and secrets may spill 📱 Y'all Said What? – Listener questions, hot takes, and social media drama ⚖️ The Verdict – Final thoughts and takeaways from both sides At the end of the day, we're not relationship experts—we're just a real married couple sharing our experiences, perspectives, wins, mistakes, and lessons learned along the way. So grab a drink, pull up a chair, and join the conversation. Welcome to His & Hers: Unfiltered—where the conversations are honest, the opinions are bold, and the drinks are always flowing. New episodes weekly. Subscribe and join the family