Ross O'Carroll-Kelly

The Irish Times
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The weekly Ross o'Carroll-Kelly column in audio, read by Paul Howard. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

  1. 10 HR AGO

    ‘You were mugged in Dalkey? Things like that don’t happen there’

    Sorcha lets out a scream when she sees me. It reminds me of the time during the recession when her BT loyalty cord was downgraded from Platinum to Electrum. It’s, like, high-pitched and – yeah, no – blood-curdling? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    6 min

  2. 12 SEPT

    ‘I didn’t do a tap in school and yet life worked out pretty well for me’

    This is me in my absolute element. I’m there, “Rugby is a sport in which you travel forwards by going backwards, in which to succeed is to ‘try’ and in which the ball is shaped with the actual intention of breaking your hort.” Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    6 min

  3. 5 SEPT

    ‘The old man running a restaurant is like asking me to teach physics through Irish’

    Sorcha says she’s delighted for my old man. Yeah, no, as you may or may not have read in the pages of this paper, he and Hennessy Coghlan-O’Hara have bought Shanahan’s on the Green and are planning to reopen it in, like, two weeks’ time. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    6 min

  4. 29 AUG

    ‘Rugby is the best idea we’ve ever come up with as a species,’ I go, channelling Fr Fehily

    It’s finally here. A day I’ve dreamt about for, like, 12 years. Brian, Johnny and Leo are storting school in Castlerock College, where their old man famously went and his old man before him. irishtimes.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    7 min

  5. 22 AUG

    Sorcha goes, ‘The Dalkey Lobster Festival is this weekend. How am I going to show my face?’

    “I remember when you got your Leaving Cert results,” Sorcha’s old man goes. “I don’t think I’ve ever been more proud of you, Dorling.” Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    6 min

  6. 15 AUG

    ‘I think you should have a conversation with Honor about her drinking,’ Sorcha goes

    So – yeah, no – we’re in the cor, on the way to the airport, to collect Honor, who’s coming home from her Leaving Cert holiday in, believe it or not, Magaluf. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    6 min

  7. 8 AUG

    ‘I got thrun out of Amedica,’ Ronan goes. ‘Me visa was revoked’

    So I’m walking around town with Ronan and – yeah, no – we’re playing a game we used to play when he was, like, eight years old: when we pass a shop or restaurant, he tells me whether it’s a real business or a money-laundering front. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    7 min

  8. 1 AUG

    When Honor drops the news, I sit there with my mouth open like someone from Roscommon seeing escalators for the first time

    Sorcha tells Honor that she’s leaving it very late. Honor’s like, “What are you talking about?” And Sorcha goes, “I’m talking about the debs, Honor.” Honor’s there, “Not this again,” and she’s right because her old is like a dog with a chew toy.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    6 min
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The weekly Ross o'Carroll-Kelly column in audio, read by Paul Howard. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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