Soul-Shaking Love

Valerie Greene

The more vibrant we become in Mind-Body-Spirit, the more magnetic and closer we become with our True Love. Relationship Expert Valerie Greene has coached people from all over the world on how to have the relationship of their dreams. She brings you interviews with top experts in the areas of mind, body, spirit, and relationship to unlock your ability to create Soul Shaking Love.

  1. 1 DAY AGO

    How to Find Joy After Heartbreak, Burnout, and Everything You Didn’t Choose

    What happens when the life you built was based on blueprints you never actually chose? Many of us grow up absorbing invisible templates — about who we should be, how we should love, what we should tolerate — long before we're old enough to question them. And then one day, we look around and realize the life we've built doesn't feel like ours. That's why I was so excited to talk with Joni, author of Burned, Blocked, and Better Than Ever. In this episode, she shares her deeply personal journey of waking up to the toxic blueprints that shaped her — from childhood trauma and emotional control to religious pressure and painful relationship patterns — and the courageous process of dismantling them to create something real. What I love about this conversation is that it doesn't stay in the pain. Joni's story is ultimately about what becomes possible on the other side: reclaiming your voice, rebuilding your identity, and discovering that healing isn't just surviving — it's creating a life you actually love. If you've ever felt like you were living someone else's script, this one will meet you right where you are. Here's what we cover in our interview: -What inspired you to write Burned, Blocked, and Better Than Ever? -In your book, you talk about "Blueprints." What do you mean by that, and how do those blueprints shape our relationships? -How did your childhood experiences impact the way you saw love, safety, and self-worth? -What does emotional control or religious control look like when someone is living inside it but doesn't fully recognize it yet? -Was there a specific tipping point where you realized you had to choose healing and freedom for yourself? -What did you have to unlearn in order to start building healthier relationships? -How did divorce become not just an ending, but also a turning point in your healing journey? -How do faith, authenticity, and emotional intelligence work together in the healing process? -What does being "better than ever" actually look like in real life — not just on social media, but in the hard, everyday moments? Free Gift: Breaking the Blueprint Reflection Guide This free downloadable guide is designed to help you begin identifying the unhealthy relationship patterns, beliefs, and emotional survival habits that may be keeping you stuck. Inside, you'll receive reflection prompts and healing insights to help you better understand your story, reconnect with your voice, and start taking practical steps toward emotional freedom, healthier boundaries, and more authentic relationships. Get your free guide here: https://joniwoods.com And you can see the full version of Joni's book, "Burned, Blocked, and Better Than Ever" here: https://amzn.to/485eCap More about Joni Woods: Joni Woods is the author of Burned, Blocked, and Better Than Ever: A Raw Journey of Healing, a deeply personal and empowering memoir about breaking free from toxic relational patterns, emotional pain, religious pressure, and the "Blueprints" that keep so many people trapped in cycles of fear, guilt, and disconnection. Through honest storytelling and hard-earned wisdom, Joni shares what it looks like to reclaim your voice, rebuild your identity, heal relational wounds, and create a life rooted in authenticity, emotional health, faith, and freedom. Her passion is helping people foster healthier relationships — with themselves, their children, their faith, and the people they love — while reminding them that healing, joy, and real love are still possible after heartbreak, trauma, and loss.

    56 min
  2. 9 APR

    The Happiness Formula

    You’ve probably heard that happiness is an inside job, but that can feel like sand slipping through your fingers with everything that’s happening in our world right now! So I’m always looking to interview experts who can help you thrive in life and love.  That’s why I decided to interview Anil Gupta, who’s known as “The Love Doctor,” about his “Happiness Formula.” In 2008 Anil Gupta was suicidal and he not only found a way to overcome his adversity and thrive, but he was determined to distill a formula for how anyone can choose to make themself happy no matter what their outer circumstances are.  Sound like a tall order in today’s world? That’s why I wanted to pick his brain about his Happiness Formula. And what’s more, he’s also offering his book for free to my audience.  Here’s what we cover in our interview:  Why do they call you the love doctor? How did you overcome your own depression and challenges? What is the Happiness formula? What are some practical things that you can do right now that can increase your levels of happiness? How can people overcome upsets? Why do relationships fail and how can we harmonize them? Why is dating so challenging and how can we enjoy the process more? You can get Anil’s book for free here: https://meetanil.com/happiness-book More about Anil Gupta:  Anil helps singles, couples and families overcome their struggles and issues in relationships and communication in a rapid and powerful manner with proven results so they can live richer, fuller lives filled with love. Anil is a triple best-selling international author and TEDx Speaker, positively impacting very large audiences in over 18 countries. Anil overcame suicide in 2008 and has since then formulated the Happiness Formula, The Happiness Test, the Relationship Score and the Relationship Ratio. He has been featured in numerous publications and media outlets including i Heart radio, Fox News, Sky TV, Harvard, ABC, NBC and much more. Anil has coached celebrities including Mike Tyson, was a guest speaker with Richard Branson on Necker Island and has been invited by heads of state and spiritual leaders like the Dalai Lama to meet them. Anil overcame suicide in 2008 and has since then formulated the Happiness Formula, The Happiness Test, the Relationship Score and the Relationship Ratio. He has held relationship and mindset workshops in over 18 countries translated in 8 languages, with audiences of over 10,000 fans. Anil has a unique intuitive gift to remove the blockages that prevent people living fulfilled lives, using his intuitive and proven skill sets. Here are his links for social media:  https://www.facebook.com/AnilLoveDoc https://www.instagram.com/anilgupta_lovedoctor https://www.linkedin.com/in/anilgupta-lovedoctor

    48 min
  3. 26 MAR

    Stop Chasing, Start Feeling: Embodied Ways to Find Love

    What if the key to finding love isn’t about doing more — but feeling more? Most of us have been taught to approach dating from the neck up: analyze the red flags, optimize our profiles, figure out “what we want.” But what if your body already knows things your mind is still catching up to?  That’s why I decided to interview Amber Lavin, a conscious dating and relationship coach who helps people  stop chasing and attract a partner who is truly right for them. In this episode, we explore embodied dating — what it actually means, why so many smart, growth-oriented people still end up in unfulfilling relationships, and how accessing your body’s wisdom can change everything. If you’re tired of overthinking your love life and ready to actually feel your way toward connection, this one’s for you. Here’s what we cover in our interview:  -What does “embodied dating” actually mean? How is it different from just going on dates and meeting people? -How can someone start tuning into their body and emotions when dating? Are there small practices you recommend? -How does being out of touch with your body or feelings keep people stuck in unfulfilling relationships? -What is one common mistake you see people making when dating that keeps them from finding conscious, emotionally available partners? -Can you share a simple exercise or practice that listeners can try today to start feeling more connected and present on dates You can get Amber’s free gift, 21 Day Becoming Secure in Love Journey, here: https://mailchi.mp/9273ce069520/knyr2ntiry A guided experience to help you date with confidence, clarity, and calm delivered straight to your inbox. Each day you will receive a short audio meditation and reflection prompt designed to help you reconnect with yourself, regulate your emotions, and open to genuine connection. The journey moves through three phases of transformation, Love as the Foundation, Embodiment and Presence, and Opening to Connection, so you can build confidence from the inside out. You will also receive a beautifully designed digital journal to track your insights, deepen your reflections, and integrate what you learn each day. Perfect for women ready to break old patterns, feel secure in love, and enjoy dating as a mindful, self-honoring practice. Here is Ambers Facebook Group:  https://www.facebook.com/share/g/1Bdx7HyFHA/?mibextid=wwXIfr More about Amber Lavin:  Amber Lavin is a longtime meditation practitioner who specializes in mind-body connection, attachment theory, and mindfulness-based relational work. She helps individuals navigate the complexities of dating and relationships by guiding them toward deeper self-awareness, emotional attunement, and embodied presence. Through a holistic and evidence based approach, Amber supports individuals in cultivating intentional relationships that align with their values and needs, believing that true connection begins from within.

    1hr 4min
  4. 12 MAR

     How to Use Pleasure to Heal Old Wounds

    Have you ever tried to heal your patterns in love — working on your attachment style, processing your childhood wounds, learning to communicate better — and it just feels like… work? Like you’re grinding through another layer of self-improvement, wondering when you’ll finally get to relax and enjoy love? What if the path to lasting change wasn’t more effort, but more pleasure? That’s why I sat down with Lauren Harkness, co-founder of The Tantra Institute, advanced certified tantra educator, and somatic trauma facilitator. Lauren has spent years helping people heal sexual trauma, transform repeating relationship patterns, and come home to their bodies as a source of wisdom, pleasure, and power. In our interview, she dropped many of nuggets of embodied wisdom that felt like coming home to myself. In this episode, we explore: ∙ What role the body and nervous system play in how we attach, connect, and relate — especially in intimate relationships ∙ How unprocessed trauma or stored stress shows up in intimacy, conflict, or desire ∙ How learning to source fulfillment and aliveness from within yourself changes the way you show up in relationships ∙ Practices you can try to build more presence, self-trust, and nervous system safety If you’ve ever felt like you know what you want in love but can’t seem to embody it, this conversation is for you. Lauren offered a free 5‑minute Sensual Activation Practice: https://laurenharkness.kartra.com/page/Blissful-path More about Lauren Harkness: Lauren is a trained Tantrika and Advanced Certified Tantra Educator with Charles Muir’s Source School of Tantra. She also studied Lafayette Morehouse practices and is trained in the D/s arts and Shamanism with Om Rupani, Somatic Experiencing with Peter Levine, and is a Mastery Graduate of Mama Gena's School of Womanly Arts. A jewelry designer and seductress, Lauren is a stand for everyone ready to heal and further ignite their sexual self, sovereign and free! She teaches Tantra and other modalities of healing and personal growth.   She also offers private Tantra Sessions, Coaching Sessions, and Reiki Healing Attunements.  She teaches large group classes internationally and has taught at Burning Man, FYN, Dark Odyssey, and is the Co-Founder of The Tantra Institute of NY. "When you touch one thing with deep awareness, you touch everything." - Thich Nhat Hanh

    46 min
  5. 25 FEB

    From Chaos to Clarity: how to use business principles to help love thrive 

    Okay, I know — "run your relationship like a business" sounds about as romantic as a spreadsheet on Valentine's Day. I thought so too before I met Dr. Robin Buckley, so stay with me for a bit.  Here's a question: Would you ever run a business with no clear roles, no regular check-ins, no shared strategy, and just... hope it all works out? Probably not. And yet — that's exactly how most of us run our relationships. We wing it. We cross our fingers. We assume love will handle the details. Sometimes it does! Often... not so much. That's what this episode of Soul-Shaking Love is all about. Dr. Robin Buckley of Marriage Inc. takes a business lens to your relationship — not to suck the romance out of it (I promise!), but to help it actually hold together when life gets messy. Think of it this way: love is the mission. Structure is what keeps the mission from going off the rails. What I love about this framework is that it gives you and your partner a way to talk about the unglamorous stuff — who does what, how you make decisions, how you check in before the small annoyances snowball into those "we need to talk" conversations. You learn to catch issues early, talk about them without getting defensive, and actually steer your relationship instead of just reacting when things blow up. This isn't about perfection. It's not about keeping the spark at a constant 10 (who can do that?!). It's about building something that can handle real life — a relationship that's stable, connected, and strong enough to grow with you. If that sounds good, you're going to love this one. Here are some questions that Dr. Robin Buckley answers during our interview:  Why do so many relationships fail even when there’s real love and good intentions? What does it actually mean to run a relationship like a business, and what does it not mean? What are the early warning signs that a relationship’s systems are breaking down, long before a crisis hits? Why is a shared vision more important than chemistry over time? What’s some “boardroom-level” strategies every couple should be having on a regular basis? For someone who feels like their relationship is already in trouble, where should they start first? You can use code MARRIAGE20 for 20% off her book Marriage Inc.: The Boardroom Blueprint for a Lasting Love at https://drrobinbuckley.com/books More about Dr. Robin Buckley  Dr. Robin Buckley holds a PhD in clinical psychology from Hofstra University, where she specialized in cognitive behavioral methodology and executive coaching. Her work has been featured by Entrepreneur, Chief, Authority Magazine, Nike, and on the TED stage in 2023. Her data-driven coaching helps organizations, couples, and individuals create practical plans to reach their goals in both work and life. She’s the author of three books, with her latest, Marriage Inc.: The Boardroom Blueprint for a Lasting Love, which hit best seller status on Amazon in 2025. With a blend of science, strategy, and heart, Robin gives people the tools to move from hoping things will get better to actually building the results they want.

    54 min
  6. 12 FEB

    Transforming Shame into Self-Love

    Shame is something most of us carry but few of us talk about openly. It can show up in response to that inner voice telling you you're too much or not enough, as the impulse to hide parts of yourself, or as patterns in relationships that leave you feeling disconnected. Yet despite how common shame is, finding effective ways to work with it remains elusive for many people.  In their latest book, Transforming the Shame Triangle: From Shame to Love Using Parts Work, Jessica Fern and David Cooley offer a fresh framework that uses parts work to help us see that shame is part of an internal “Drama Triangle” that they call “The Shame Triangle” and they present a groundbreaking system, integrating IFS with other modalities, to transform shame into Self-Love. When I saw that, I knew I needed to interview them to share these tools with more people. :)  What makes their approach particularly valuable is the practical integration of parts work, giving us concrete tools rather than abstract concepts. They share some of these tools in our interview.  Here’s what we covered in this groundbreaking interview:  What is parts work in the IFS context? What is the Shame Triangle & what is its destructive impact? How do we heal Shame at its roots—not just manage it? How do we transform the Shame Triangle into the self-Love Triangle? What does integrating the Self-Love Triangle as a new way of living look like? How have these tools helped you and your clients tangibly experience more love, creativity, and resourcefulness in all relationships?  If you’re someone who has felt the weight of shame and wondered how to move through it, this interview meets you where you are. The authors bring both professional expertise and genuine warmth to a topic that too often gets treated with clinical distance or, worse, more shame. You can get their book, "Transforming the Shame Triangle," here: https://amzn.to/4a5mEQE Jessica and David are teaching an 8-week online course to help you integrate and deepen the work in their book. It launches at the end of February of 2026. You can learn more about that here: https://the-azurite-way.mykajabi.com/transforming-the-shame-triangle-feb-2026 Here are their other books: "Polysecure" by Jessica Fern: https://amzn.to/4bzCSnC "Polywise" By Jessica Fern and David Cooley: https://amzn.to/3LLJpRG More about Jessica Fern and David Cooley: Jessica Fern is a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional, a trained Internal Family Systems (IFS) practitioner, and an integrative therapist drawing on 25 years of experience in somatic, narrative, psychotherapeutic, and spiritual healing modalities. She is the internationally recognized author of Polysecure, and the coauthor with David Cooley of the books Polywise and their newest book Transforming the Shame Triangle. You can learn more about her work at: https://www.jessicafern.com/ David Cooley is a professional Restorative Justice facilitator, diversity and privilege awareness trainer, and bilingual cultural broker. He is the creator of the Restorative Relationship Conversations model, a process that transforms interpersonal conflict into deeper connection, intimacy and repair. You can learn more about his work at: https://www.restorativerelationship.com/

    1hr 11min
  7. 23 JAN

    How to Communicate So You Actually Feel Closer

    We’ve all been there: we want to communicate about something that’s bothering us, but we know that if we bring it up, it’ll lead to an argument and then we’ll have 2 problems instead of one: the original problem and now you also feel disconnected. Few of us had good modeling for how to communicate in a way that brings us closer.  That’s why I chose to interview Raffi Bilek. Raffi has developed a streamlined formula for how to communicate with your partner in a way that inspires connection rather than conflict and isolation - even when it comes to the really hard stuff. He has helped hundreds of couples improve their communication, boost their connection, recover from hurts and betrayals, and, in many cases, save their marriages. He shares his formula in our interview and also in his book, “The Couples Communication Handbook,” which he talks about in our interview.  Here are some questions that Raffi answers in our interview:  Why is communication so important for connection? What do people get wrong about communication? How can conflict breed connections? What can you do when you’re upset so that your communication lands well?  What are the formulas to share your feelings, desires, and resolve issues so you can feel closer rather than more distant?  You can get the first 2 chapters of Raffi’s book, “The Couples Communication Handbook“ for free at https://www.thecommunicationbook.com/ (PDF or audio files!) More about Raffi Bilek:  Raffi Bilek has been working with couples across the globe for over a decade. He has helped hundreds of couples improve their communication, boost their connection, recover from hurts and betrayals, and, in many cases, save their marriages. ​Before that, Raffi earned a degree in computer science from Brown University, but never much enjoyed it because the computers wouldn’t laugh at his humor. Besides being a couples counselor and a computer programmer, Raffi is a dad to four girls, a former swing dancer, an Orthodox Jewish rabbi, and a nationally ranked Scrabble player. ​Raffi speaks English, Hebrew, French, and Spanish, has seen the fjords (they really are that good), and enjoys playing word games and telling good (and bad) jokes. He deeply loves his wife, but frankly wishes she got more of his jokes.

    44 min
  8. 6 JAN

    Anger Isn’t the Problem in Relationships – Rupture without Repair Is

    Anger is one of the most misunderstood emotions in relationships—and often the most shamed. Which makes sense! Unregulated anger can be genuinely scary. But when we do have the skills to manage our emotions, anger becomes something different: a protective signal. It's telling us a need isn't being met, a boundary's been crossed, or our nervous system is maxed out. Learn to speak kindly when you're angry, or learn how to co-regulate each other's anger, and it can actually bring you closer to your partner. That's exactly why I wanted to talk to Davina Hehn, an anger management expert. We get into why anger shows up so differently in different people, how emotional reactivity hijacks connection, and what actually helps couples move from blowing up to repair. Davina introduces the idea of anger archetypes, explains how your nervous system shapes your conflict patterns, and shares practical ways to respond to anger with curiosity—not defensiveness. Here’s what we cover in our interview:  Why is anger so demonized in romantic relationships?  How do you differentiate “healthy anger” from reactive or destructive anger?  What’s actually happening in the nervous system during emotional blowups?  Why do some people explode while others shut down during conflict?  How does childhood conditioning or attachment style shape our anger responses? What’s the most common mistake couples make when anger shows up?  How can someone respond differently in the moment (before things escalate)?  How can people learn their anger patterns and practice regulation in real time?  This conversation is for anyone who’s ever thought, “Why do we keep having the same fight?”—and is ready to understand what anger is really trying to say in love. You can get Davina’s free Anger Archetype Quiz here: https://asteadyspace.com/anger-archetype-quiz More about Davina Hehn: Davina Hehn is a trained therapist turned mental health coach, speaker, and founder of A Steady Space. She helps people transform explosive reactions, simmering resentment, and shutdown habits into emotional clarity and connection. Her work is rooted in her own powerful story of healing a struggling marriage and rewriting the patterns she inherited. Davina specializes in Anger Intelligence and building healthier communication that strengthens families across generations, empowering parents to raise children in ways worth repeating.

    1hr 2min

About

The more vibrant we become in Mind-Body-Spirit, the more magnetic and closer we become with our True Love. Relationship Expert Valerie Greene has coached people from all over the world on how to have the relationship of their dreams. She brings you interviews with top experts in the areas of mind, body, spirit, and relationship to unlock your ability to create Soul Shaking Love.

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