Speaking with Gravity

Created by Kervin K. Searles, LPC
  • 0.0 (0)
  • Mental Health
  • Every two weeks

Speaking with Gravity is a bi-weekly mental health and culture podcast created to break stigma and open doors to healing in the Black community. Hosted by mental health professionals and real people living real life, we have honest, down-to-earth conversations about what we’re carrying and how to cope with stress, anxiety, trauma, identity, relationships, grief, purpose, and more. Our mission is simple: spark conversations that help you think, feel, and do what’s best for you, because everything affects everything. This podcast is educational and inspirational. It does not replace therapy.

  1. 16 Jul

    Beyond Waiting It Out: Proactive Grief Processing | Speaking With Gravity Ep 110

    The season finale is here, and we are closing out with a conversation that hits close to home. In Chapter 110, the crew sits down with licensed therapist, grief educator, and founder of the Mending Hearts Initiative, Tinisha Pender, for a raw, unfiltered look at what it truly means to heal. Too often, we’re told to just "give it time" or "wait it out" when we experience catastrophic loss. But time doesn't heal wounds if you're just running on autopilot. In this episode, we break down the heavy physical toll of unaddressed heartache, look at why the traditional "stages" don't always fit our real-world experiences, and explore how to show up for your people when the crowd thins out and the noise dies down. If you’ve ever felt like you had to keep it moving for the family, the business, or the kids while carrying an unspoken weight, this episode was built for you. Season 11 Finale Intro & Host Check-InsKervin, Shrika, Tinisha, and Terance lock in for the final episode of the season and introduce our special guest. The People Want to Know: Autopilot vs. Raw PainThe crew gets real about their personal default coping mechanisms when major loss hits. Do you stay busy to outrun it, or do you actually sit with the weight? QD of the Hour: The Physical Reality of HeartbreakThe literal science behind the pain. We discuss how recent neuroimaging studies prove grief activates the same brain pathways as physical pain, and how suppressing it leads to severe sleep disruptions and somatic trauma. The "Why" Behind the Work: Read the RoomTinisha shares her transition from juvenile probation to the mental health field, the personal loss that sparked her calling, and why humans try to "fix" a broken heart instead of just being present. The School-to-Prison Pipeline & Finding the "Why"A deeper dive into systemic challenges, looking past behaviors to see the underlying trauma, and why checking the cultural context matters more than generic research. The Mending Hearts Initiative & Bereaved Mother's DayHow an organic community support group transformed into a nonprofit, creating sacred spaces for mothers who have experienced sudden loss to feel seen, held, and poured into past the funeral. Debunking the Five Stages of GriefWhy grief isn't a linear race. The team breaks down the frustration of trying to fit into rigid definitions and discusses why it's okay if your healing journey comes in waves for the rest of your life. Culturally Competent Spaces: Group Support vs. Individual TherapyWhy generic, traditional spaces don’t always connect with our generation, and how combining individual therapy with a true communal village creates space to say the quiet parts out loud. Beyond the Chicken Box: How to Truly Show Up After the Noise Dies DownPractical advice on how to support someone walking through a dark season. What happens when the food is gone, the money is spent, and the loneliness hits? Outro & Community PlugsWhere to connect with Tinisha, upcoming community events, and a special shout-out to Winston for holding down the production. 💡 Remember: Healing is a choice, but you don't have to choose it alone. Seek the right, wise counsel. Everything affects everything. This is therapy adjacent, but it isn't therapy—it's just the podcast. 🎧 Listen & Subscribe: Available on Spotify and all major podcast platforms[cite: 1, 2].📲 Follow us on social media: @speakingwithgravity🌐 Connect with our guest: Learn more about therapy services and community grief education at mendingheartstcs.com and mendingheartssc.org.✨ Need a space to reflect? Visit gravitycounselinggroup.com to explore our counseling services, workshops, and community resources. ⏰ Episode Timestamps

  2. 2 Jul

    The Internet is Undefeated: But Is It Playing Fair? | Speaking With Gravity Ep 109

    We’ve all been there: you’re mindlessly scrolling late at night, and a 60-second clip pops up on your feed that completely reads your entire life. Suddenly, you’re questioning your friendships, your choices, and your whole perspective. But is that viral advice actually dropping gems, or is it just messing with your peace? In Episode 109 of Speaking with Gravity, Kervin, Sherika, and Terance are pulling back the curtain on how online "therapy" culture can strip away the personalized care you actually need. From using TikTok hacks to navigate major life moves to figuring out if ChatGPT is really qualified to be in your business, the crew breaks down how to protect your mind while navigating the digital streets. Grab your headphones and tap in as we talk about guarding your timeline, breaking down psychological traps, and keeping it real about human connection. 00:05 - Welcome back to Gravity The crew sets the stage for Episode 109. 01:31 - The People Want to Know: TikTok Decisions Terance puts everyone on the spot with a heavy hitter: Have you ever cut off a friend or made a major life choice based entirely on a 60-second reel? 03:24 - From Consumer Reports to TikTok Holes Terance shares how a deep dive into the TikTok algorithm actually taught him how to handle car dealerships, negotiate like a boss, and secure his truck . 06:43 - The Real Data on Viral "Therapy" Sherika drops a major reality check from a 2025 study revealing that over half of viral mental health videos contain clinically inaccurate or straight-up misleading information. 09:20 - Cognitive Dissonance vs. Your Feed Kervin breaks down how algorithms feed our confirmation bias, trapping us in rabbit holes that only tell us what we want to hear instead of challenging us to grow. 11:25 - Can AI Really Pull Up as Your Therapist? The crew gets into the rise of people treating ChatGPT, Gemini, and Claude like a digital best friend. They explore why AI will validate you, but why it won't ever give you the real, vulnerable human connection needed to heal. 19:22 - Spotting the BRODA Tactic & Rage Baiting Ever notice how people online will bait you with a wild take, refuse to have a real conversation, and then attack your character? Kervin shares a personal story about how online debates can sway real-world relationships. 29:46 - Guarding Your Peace & Tailoring Your Algorithm Practical gems on how to consciously curate a positive timeline by being intentional with your likes, shares, and comments. 32:18 - Outro & Final Words A reminder that while the internet is powerful, it shouldn't dictate your life's playbook. 📌 Remember: This isn't therapy—it's a podcast! If you're ready to get out of the comment section and dive into real growth, pull up and listen to Speaking with Gravity on all major audio and social platforms. Holler at us if you need us! 📚 Grab The Crew's Books! Ready to take the lessons from the podcast and apply them to your real life? Grab your copies of the crew's latest books to keep your growth journey going: By Kervin Searles: Undrafted and Purposed: Still Living, Loving, and Leading in Life The Metaphorical Playbook: Written specifically for those who feel unseen, misunderstood, or stuck in patterns that no longer serve them. Kervin combines real-life stories, psychology, and sports metaphors to help you reclaim your position and understand your worth. By Terance Dawkins: B.L.A.C.K. Trauma Journal: Building Language Awareness Connections & Knowledge By working through this journal, you’ll cultivate the tools needed to Build Language, Awareness, Connections, and Knowledge to step into a life of greater self-awareness, emotional freedom, and healing. 👉 How to get them: Head over to GravityCounselingGroup.com OR to Store 1 — Missing Pieces Counseling Services and secure your copies directly. You can also look them up on major online book retailers like Amazon and Books-A-Million!

  3. 18 Jun

    The Body’s Receipt: Stress & Somatic Truth | Speaking With Gravity Ep 108

    Have you ever had a physical symptom—like a debilitating migraine, a heavy chest, or sudden back pain—that only showed up after a chaotic week, but you still tried to tell yourself you were "fine"? In our culture, we’re often taught to be strong, keep our heads down, and push past the pain. Grind culture tells us that rest is lazy, so we dissociate from our bodies just to survive our day-to-day demands. But burnout isn’t just an emotional state—it’s a physical reality stored directly in your tissues. Your body is keeping a strict receipt of the trauma and stress your mind tries to ignore. In this powerful episode of Speaking with Gravity, hosts Kervin Searles, Terance Dawkins, and Sherika Anderson are joined by special guest host Shameka Chanel, Clinical Director of Points of Origin Counseling. Together, they break down the philosophical trap of Cartesian Dualism—the harmful separation of mind and body that forces us to treat our bodies like machine tools instead of messengers meant to be heard. If you've been feeling chronically tired, struggling with gut issues, or realizing you've been living entirely in your head, this episode is your invitation to log back into your body. It’s time to stop throwing away the body’s receipts and start reclaiming your holistic health. ​[0:00 – 10:00] Opening: The People Want to Know 🎙️ The crew introduces the signature question: How does your body typically signal to you that you've reached your limit before your mind is ready to admit it? Plus, a deep dive into Cartesian Dualism and why treating our bodies like machines is breaking our community down. ​[10:00 – 15:00] QD of the Hour (Quotable Data): Somatization Defined 📊 Breaking down the clinical definition of somatization—the psychological distress that physically manifests in the body. We address why up to 33% of primary care patients are actually experiencing physical pain rooted in unaddressed psychological stress. ​[15:00 – 30:00] The Core Conversation: Trapped Trauma & Physical Signs 🧠Guest Shameka Chanel shares her personal journey with body awareness and maps out the concrete alarm systems of impending burnout. Learn why holding excess weight in your core and suffering from chronic digestive issues are direct signs that your parasympathetic nervous system is failing to process your stress. ​[30:00 – 40:00] Somatic Exercises & "Soma Flow" 🧘‍♀️ Moving away from standard talk therapy into real, actionable somatic healing. The hosts walk through practical methods for "body-mapping" and introducing "Soma Flow" exercises to help release trapped emotional energy from your muscles. ​[40:00 – 50:00] Conversation Starter & The "Crash" 💥The team unpacks the reality of hitting a physical "crash"—those moments where your body forces you to stop because your mind refuses to. How do we rewrite our playbook to respect our nervous systems?​[50:00 – 57:39] Outro: Tools for Reclaiming the Self 📖 Closing thoughts on self-expression and community healing. Shameka highlights how a lack of body connection directly fractures our relationships and identity. ​Embodied Self Reclamation: A 30-Day Holistic Journey by Shameka Chanel​Undrafted and Purposed: Still Living, Loving, and Leading in Life by Kervin Searles​B.L.A.C.K. Trauma Journal & Cards by Terance DawkinsListen & Subscribe: Available on all major podcast platforms. Follow us on social media: @speakingwithgravity Need professional support? Visit gravitycounselinggroup.com to connect with culturally competent therapists. Remember: Everything affects everything.

  4. 4 Jun

    Communication and Connection | Speaking With Gravity Ep 107

    Welcome back to Speaking with Gravity, the space where we unpack mental health and remind you that everything affects everything. In this powerful episode, your resident hosts and licensed therapists—Kervin Searles, Sherika Anderson, and Terance Dawkins—are pulling up a chair to have a real, transparent conversation about what it truly takes to bridge the gap between being mere "roommates" and becoming true soulmates. Oftentimes in our community, we think a relationship only ends because of a "Big Bang" like infidelity or a massive blow-up. But the truth is much quieter. Sometimes, we just hit autopilot. We get complacent, we stop dating, and we exhaust our possibilities instead of choosing intentional intimacy. Taking inspiration from the classic film Love Jones, the SWG crew discuss why romance fades and how getting curious about the person sitting across from you can completely shift your connection. From navigating how childhood upbringings shape our love languages to breaking down the literal formula for conflict-resolving "I statements," this episode is packed with the therapeutic culture shifts we need to love deeper and live better. If you are ready to stop showing up as just a "representative" and start building a resilient, authentic connection, this one is for you. Press play, get these tools, and let’s stop guessing and start verbalizing. [00:02] – Welcome back to Speaking with Gravity: Easing into Episode 107 with Kervin, Sherika, and Terance. [01:10] – The Love Jones Theory: Moving from exhausted possibilities to intentional intimacy, inspired by Darius Love Hall. [03:32] – The Cohabitation Trap: Why do we get complacent once we move in together, and how presenting a "representative" instead of our authentic selves trips us up? [06:39] – Keep the Goals Flowing: The importance of never-ending relationship goals so you don't stall out after marriage and kids. [09:34] – The 94% Rule (QD of the Hour): Breaking down Gottman Institute data on how the first few minutes of a conversation predict its entire outcome. [12:37] – Master the "I Statement": Terance and Kervin drop the exact communication formula to cut relationship arguments in half. [16:44] – "How Do You Know They Don't Know How to Love?": A deep dive into love languages, childhood upbringings, and unreceived affection. [20:05] – Securing "Cool Points": Kervin shares a hilarious personal story about late-night Waffle House runs and learning his wife's appreciation language. [24:02] – The "You Should Just Know" Debate: Reeka steps up for the sisters to break down what women actually mean when they drop this infamous line. [32:02] – Therapeutic Takeaways: Final gems from the hosts on verbalizing your needs, dropping assumptions, and choosing romance daily. Enjoyed the episode? Don't forget to Subscribe, Rate, and Leave a Review on your favorite platform! 📲 Follow us on Social Media: @speakingwithgravity Looking for support on your healing journey? Your mental health and relationship wellness matter. Visit gravitycounselinggroup.com to learn more about our therapy services, couples workshops, and community healing resources. Watch on YouTube: Check out our full video episodes and deep dives in the show notes on YouTube to connect with the team directly! Remember: When we learn how to love, we'll know how to live. Everything affects everything. 🤎✊🏾

  5. 21 May

    What We Got Wrong About Friendship | Season 11 Ep 106

    Hey family! Welcome back to another powerful episode of Speaking with Gravity. Since it's Mental Health Awareness Month, we are diving deep into a topic that affects our peace, our joy, and our healing: Friendship. As Black men and women, we are often taught to carry the world on our shoulders, but life is meant to be done in community. This week, hosts Kervin Searles, Sherika Anderson, and Terance Dawkins are joined by a very special guest: powerhouse trauma therapist, TikTok creator, and author Dr. Jaquinda Jackson! Together, we’re unpacking the myths, the boundaries, and the beautiful realities of adult friendships. Are your friends pouring back into your cup? Are you picking your inner circle with intentionality, or just letting whoever sit at your table? We're getting real, raw, and hilarious about what it means to build an authentic, safe support system. Grab your tea, your headphones, or your walking shoes, and let’s get into it! 🎧✨ [00:00] Welcome to Speaking with Gravity! Meet the team and our special guest, trauma therapist Dr. Jaquinda Jackson, as we kick off Mental Health Awareness Month. [01:36] The Friendship "Performance Review" If your friendship was a career this month, would you get a promotion, a PIP (Performance Improvement Plan), or straight-up fired? The hosts give their hilariously honest answers. [05:04] "Don't Call Me on Monday Night!" Why therapists secretly hate talking on the phone after work, and how life stages change our availability. [07:14] Boundaries & Priority Lists How to vocalize your boundaries so your friends know exactly when and how to show up for you. [09:12] The Red Flags vs. Green Flags Are you the only one pouring into the relationship? The crew breaks down one-sided dynamics and why a real friend respects your marriage and family boundaries. [12:06] Staying "In Alignment" Through Life's Seasons Navigating the shifts when some friends are single, some are married, and some are just going through a hard season. [14:29] How Do You Define a True Friend? Looking past proximity to find people who share your common goals, entrepreneurial mindsets, and personal growth paths. [18:40] Psychological Safety & Accountability If your friend can't look you in the eye and tell you that you're making a bad decision, are they really a good friend? [29:39] Healing the Strong Black Woman Dr. Jaquinda Jackson introduces her actionable workbook, discussing how trauma impacts the Black community, why Black women are facing high stress rates, and how to build a chosen community that heals. [38:44] Reconnecting and Overcoming Regret Kervin shares a personal story about a spontaneous road trip to Georgia to reconnect with an old friend, proving that true friendships shouldn't be complicated. [41:53] Main Takeaways & Closing Out The final gems: Choose your friends, protect your table, and remember that you have the power to create your own chosen family. 🌟 Key Gems from the Episode "Be careful who you let sit at your table, because not everybody deserve a seat." — Terance Dawkins "Your friendships are the people that you have the opportunity to not think about how you was brought up, not think about your blood, but you can be intentional about who you allow to be able to create that safe space with." — Sharika Anderson Dr. Jaquinda Jackson: Follow her on TikTok and all social platforms @DrJaquindaJackson for amazing mental health content, and check out her book Healing the Strong Black Woman. Speaking with Gravity: Subscribe on all major podcast platforms and follow us on social media at @speakingwithgravity. Check the show notes for individual contact info! Don't forget to Like, Share, and Subscribe! Drop a comment below: Based on this month, are you getting a promotion or a PIP in your friendships? 👇🏾🔥

  6. 7 May

    Different, Not Deficit: The Neurodiversity Wave | Speaking With Gravity Ep 105

    Are you constantly fighting against procrastination, or do you feel like your brain is just wired differently than everyone else’s? 🧠✨ In this powerful episode of Speaking With Gravity, host Kervin Searles is joined by co-hosts Sherika Anderson and Terance Dawkins, along with special guest Passion Bankhead, a Licensed Professional Counselor (LPC) from South Carolina. We’re tearing down the stigma surrounding ADHD and Neurodiversity. For too long, our symptoms have been mislabeled as "character flaws" or "laziness". Passion breaks down how cultural pressures play a massive role in who gets support and who just gets disciplined. Whether you’re an entrepreneur looking to turn your "hyper-focus" into a superpower or a parent trying to navigate the school system for your child, this conversation provides the blueprint for moving from a "deficit" mindset to embracing your unique brilliance. ​00:16 – Welcome to Season 11: Different, Not Deficit. ​01:36 – Meet the Guest: Passion, LPC, on working with neurodivergence in the clinic and schools. ​03:26 – The People Want to Know: "When did you realize your brain worked differently?". ​08:43 – QD of the Hour: The shocking rise in ADHD and Autism projections for 2025/2026. ​11:18 – Symptoms vs. Character Flaws: Why we mislabel struggling kids as "disrespectful" or "lazy". ​14:29 – The Misdiagnosis Trap: Trauma-related symptoms vs. ADHD labels. ​19:41 – Professional Help vs. TikTok Trends: How to seek a real clinical diagnosis. ​28:38 – Interest vs. Importance: The secret to motivating the neurodivergent brain. ​31:05 – The "PTO" Method: A genius strategy for helping kids take responsibility for their behavior. ​39:54 – Neurodivergent Excellence: Why entrepreneurs and creatives thrive as adults. ​42:53 – Upcoming Training: Support for ADHD parents raising ADHD children. Connect with the Squad: ​Passion: Find her at Outside of the Box Therapy in Gaffney, SC. ​Terance Dawkins: Find him at Missing Pieces Counseling in Spartanburg, SC. (missingpiecescounseling.com) ​Kervin & Sherika: Find them at Gravity Counseling Group in Greenwood, SC. (gravitycounselinggroup.com)Don't forget to subscribe and leave a review! Everything affects everything. 🎙️✊🏾 How has understanding your "wiring" changed the way you show up in your relationships or career? Let us know in the comments!

  7. 23 Apr

    The Connection Crisis: Connected But Alone | Speaking With Gravity Ep 104

    If your phone died for 48 hours, who in your "circle" would actually show up at your front door to check on you? 📱🚪 Welcome back to Speaking With Gravity for Season 11, Episode 104. In this episode, Terance, Kervin, and Sherika tackle The Connection Crisis. We discuss the startling reality that in 2023, the U.S. Surgeon General declared loneliness a public health epidemic—revealing that social isolation can be as deadly as smoking 15 cigarettes a day. Whether you are the "strong friend" who gives 100% and receives 0%, or you’re struggling to bridge the gap between your digital followers and your real-world village, this conversation is the wake-up call we all need to regulate our nervous systems through authentic connection. Watch, listen, and stay grounded. Because everything affects everything. 00:00 - The 48-Hour Reality Check: Who shows up when the screen goes dark? 04:40 - The Loneliness Epidemic: Is isolation deadlier than smoking? 10:15 - Digital Intimacy vs. Real Connection: Why DMs aren't enough 13:30 - Dopamine Hits vs. Oxytocin: The science of a "Like" vs. a Hug 18:50 - The "Edit" Culture: How social media prevents raw vulnerability 24:15 - Auditing Your Inner Circle: The "Kervin Searles Method" 30:10 - The "Why" Behind the Post: Moving from autopilot to intention 34:00 - Breaking the "Strong Friend" Cycle 39:55 - Resource Spotlight: My B.L.A.C.K. Trauma Journal & Undrafted and Purposed Undrafted and Purposed: Still Living, Loving, and Leading in Life by Kervin Searles. A roadmap for men (and those who love them) to lead with purpose. My B.L.A.C.K. Trauma Journal by Terance Dawkins. An acronym for Building Language, Awareness, Connections, and Knowledge. 🔗 Get the tools for your journey: gravitycounselinggroup.com We want to hear from you. After auditing your "Top 5" contacts—is the energy flow mutual? Or are there "Thieves in the Den" stealing your joy through comparison? Drop a "🤝" in the comments if you're committing to an in-person connection this week! Follow the Movement: 📸 Instagram/Facebook: @SpeakingWithGravity 🎙️ All Podcast Platforms: Speaking With Gravity #SpeakingWithGravity #ConnectionCrisis #BlackMentalHealth #GenerationalHealing #StrongFriend #SurgeonGeneral #TheVillage #EverythingAffectsEverything

  8. 9 Apr

    The Stories We Keep (And the Ones That Keep Us) | Speaking With Gravity Ep 103

    Ever wonder why "be home before the streetlights come on" felt like more than just a curfew? Or why "what stays in this house" was the golden rule? Welcome back to Speaking with Gravity. In this heavy-hitting episode, Terance, Kervin, and Sherika dive deep into inherited trauma and the hidden emotional baggage we carry without even knowing it. We aren't just talking about old stories; we’re looking at epigenetics—how the stress and trauma of our ancestors can actually leave chemical marks on our DNA. If you’re ready to move from being a character in someone else’s history to the author of your own story, this one is for you. The "Streetlight Rule" Unpacked: Why historical safety for people of color turned a survival tactic into a modern household rule . Family Business vs. Family Survival: Understanding the roots of "hushing" children and its connection to slavery and historical consequences. The Science of the Struggle: Terance explains the groundbreaking research on how trauma-induced DNA changes are passed down through generations . Talking TO vs. Talking AT: A vital shift for parents to promote critical thinking and better relationships with their kids . Breaking the Cycle: Practical tips on interviewing your elders and using curiosity to understand your own patterns. 01:13 – The People Want to Know: Rules we didn’t realize were trauma responses. 04:40 – "Don't tell people our business": Analyzing the "mute state" . 06:50 – Historical Context: How slavery and the Holocaust shaped intergenerational responses. 11:15 – Epigenetics 101: Environmental factors and DNA changes. 13:56 – The Mouse Study: How trauma responses are born before the child is . 18:59 – Communication Shift: The difference between giving orders and giving the "why" . 24:59 – "Do as I say, not as I do": Why the "Why" matters for development. 38:10 – Final Takeaways: Learning your story and remaining curious. 39:55 – Resource Spotlight: My B.L.A.C.K. Trauma Journal (Building Language, Awareness, Connections, and Knowledge). "We want to move from being a character in someone else's story to being the author of our own." — Kervin Searles Connect with the Gravity Team: 🔗 Website: gravitycounselinggroup.com 📸 Social Media: @SpeakingWithGravity 📖 Resource: Pick up the My B.L.A.C.K. Trauma Journal by Terance Dawkins (https://a.co/d/0fRxcnBy). Subscribe & Review: If this episode resonated with your journey, leave us a review and share it with the family. Remember—everything affects everything.

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About

Speaking with Gravity is a bi-weekly mental health and culture podcast created to break stigma and open doors to healing in the Black community. Hosted by mental health professionals and real people living real life, we have honest, down-to-earth conversations about what we’re carrying and how to cope with stress, anxiety, trauma, identity, relationships, grief, purpose, and more. Our mission is simple: spark conversations that help you think, feel, and do what’s best for you, because everything affects everything. This podcast is educational and inspirational. It does not replace therapy.

Information

  • Creator
    Created by Kervin K. Searles, LPC
  • Years Active
    2021 - 2026
  • Episodes
    106
  • Rating
    Clean
  • Copyright
    © Created by Kervin K. Searles, LPC
  • Show Website
    Speaking with Gravity