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−5 d

What Percent Gay Are You?

Check out Hoop and Huddle, YMH Studios' new comedy sports show, hosted by comedians Luke Touma & Nate Marshall. Two friends talking basketball, football, and whatever ruined their weekend. Less "analysts breaks down the tape," more "your boys yelling at the TV." https://www.youtube.com/@UCdaQbXFKAuvKcZcwieo8A6A SPONSORS: Thanks to MANSCAPED® for sponsoring today’s episode! Get The Lawn Mower® Ultra Gen 6 for 15% OFF + Free Shipping with code BEARS at https://Manscaped.com! The DraftKings Sports app is now live in all 50 states! Head to https://dkng.co/bears For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://hims.com/bears Sign up and get 10% off at https://BetterHelp.com/bears. Get out there and enjoy the outdoors with Mountain Dew. An American Original. Tasting Great Since ’48. Look for Mountain Dew in stores near you. Welcome back to the cave! Hunter Biden says he's 48% gay, which raises the only question that matters: what percent are you? Bert and Tom build the math from zero, clothes, dicks, physiques, saunas, eye patches, a $5,000 face laser, and Bert climbs a lot higher than he expected to. Along the way: why Bert can't watch Sophie Cunningham highlights, the uncomfortable truth about loving Jason Williams, John Stockton's total lack of pizzazz, the hunt for a white DB in the NFL, Bert calling his dad mid-episode to check the family for slave owners (Tom's family does not come out clean), Bert's sister telling him to grow up about his sleep anxiety, Ila volunteering to fight Tom's ten-year-old in the Octagon, the 2:30am Dodger Stadium aftermath, a device that grades your poop, and Bert's full-throated defense of the Philadelphia Eagles' male cheerleader. Plus: this week's Mountain Dew summer sizzle submissions, including one that requires $2.6 million of CGI and one that just shuts Bert up. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 339 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com In Partnership with DraftKings. The Crown Is Yours. Bet with DK Sportsbook: Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-426-2537, 1-800-697-3738. Connecticut: call 888-789-7777, visit https://ccpg.org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. 21+. Void in Canada. Event contract trading with DraftKings Predictions involves risk of loss. Availability varies. Bet to get Bonus bets that expire in 7 days. Trade to get $50 in Predictions Dollars that expire in 1 year, issued every 7 days via click to claim for 21 days. 1 non-withdrawable reward redeemable. Predictions offer void in New York. Ends July 19th. Terms at https://dkng.co/audio. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:14 - Hunter Biden Says He's 48% Gay 00:06:23 - Clip Farms, Sophie Cunningham, & Jason Williams 00:15:32 - John Stockton, White Boxers & Tim Dwight 00:29:23 - California's Slavery Bill & Bert Calls His Dad 00:34:41 - The Girlfriend, The Sister, & The Fight Challenge 00:42:34 - The Dodgers Game Aftermath & A Whoop For Your Toilet 00:46:11 - Male Cheerleaders, Female Urologists, & Checking Out Men 00:52:38 - Hiding From Lightning With A Grindr Meetup 00:59:05 - Comedian OnlyFans & Ohtani's $17 Million Translator 01:05:44 - Mountain Dew Summer Sizzle Submissions 01:11:34 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
−3 d

Sliding Into Zac Efron's DMs w/ Duncan Trussell

SPONSORS: -Go to https://helixsleep.com/ymh for 27% Off Sitewide — Exclusive for listeners of Your Mom's House. -For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://hims.com/YMH for your free online visit. -Get out there and enjoy the outdoors with Mountain Dew. An American Original. Tasting Great Since ’48. Look for Mountain Dew in stores near you. Mom's back! This week, Christina's holding down the Mommy Dome with your fav stepdad Duncan Trussell, and she opens with a status report: off the Domino's, back on vegetables and hydroponic lettuce, cat art again. Duncan informs her she's accidentally enlisted in the war against hedonism, and they go straight into the void, plant medicine vs. getting f****d up for fun, starting a spiritual practice as an act of aggression against yourself, and Duncan's three theories of what happens when you die, including the one that terrifies him most: blinking into a stranger's midlife as a cab driver in New York, forever. They also pull up the Heaven's Gate doc and rank it the most disappointing cult in history, and Duncan mounts a full defense of the stability of all men. Christine's got some wild curations including a man harvesting tree bark with his teeth, a Lake Tahoe hippie who trades meditation classes for a room, a guy who wants $100 and your car for his DMV test, and a woman who is furious that you think her rabbit is Winnie the Pooh. Then Christina admits she met Zac Efron in the Mothership green room, Duncan diagnoses the only viable strategy, and she composes and sends him a message live on the show. Plus: an AI girlfriend for a man with dementia, whacking material in Airplane!, the dead panther chameleon and the $400 robot duck replacing him, which animal Christina's face actually is, a Hungarian guy to screen her calls, why no man is meeting her kids until they're 18, and a waxing video that takes the mustache with it. Enjoy! Your Mom’s House Ep. 877 https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:40 - The War On Hedonism 00:06:04 - Self-Help & AI Girlfriends 00:17:54 - Opening Clip: Get Ahold Of Me, Please 00:22:48 - Three Theories Of What Happens When You Die 00:28:30 - Heaven's Gate: The Most Disappointing Cult 00:35:33 - Duncan Defends All Men & The Gym Guy Conspiracy 00:41:52 - Garden Hermits 00:44:32 - Horny For News Anchors 00:49:32 - Christina Messages Zac Efron 00:55:20 - Eating Dicks In London & Page Six 01:05:53 - Christina's Curations 01:09:33 - Cool Robot Duck 01:14:25 - More TikToks 01:23:33 - Wrap Up 01:24:49 - Closing Song - "Fartin" by Terry Nova Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
7 sep.

Jelly Roll Called The President A Fat Pig

SPONSORS: Don’t let your mind get in the way of a good time. Discover your options at https://BlueChew.com Visit https://ethos.com/BEARS Sign up for your free trial at https://shopify.com/bears Sign up now and join over 14 million people already investing with Acorns. New customers get a $20 bonus investment just for signing up. Head to https://acorns.com/bears to claim your $20 bonus today. Limited time offer. Terms and conditions apply. See https://acorns.com/terms for details. New DraftKings customers, sign up with code BEARS spend five bucks to get $200 in rewards within 21 days - includes all markets. Welcome back to 2 Bears 1 Cave! This week Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer dive right in with Jelly Roll's headline-grabbing Kimmel monologue where he addressed the president as "from one fat pig to another." Bert then takes full credit for Jelly Roll's weight loss and the entire genesis of the Two Bears 5K, because technically he was in the room when that casually became a thing. They also have exciting news, a new 5K is coming in April and it's going to be bigger than ever. From there, Bert opens up about the panic attacks he's been having, severe, physical, and rooted in something he now understands: a complete lack of childhood bedtime structure. Tom grew up getting nightly Catholic prayers, a sign of the cross from mom, and the full rosary in the car for any trip over ten minutes. Bert grew up watching Letterman alone at nine years old at 3am while his dad slept off a ten mile run. The bears compare notes on childhood bedtime routines, how they each put their own kids down now, and what sleep anxiety looks like when it hits a grown adult, including Bert's most recent 36-hour panic attack that started when a friend told him he yawns too much and he forgot how to do it. He couldn't yawn for a day and a half. He finally yawned in couples therapy. That's where we are. They also get into Mel Gibson getting lightly canceled for mocking a sign language interpreter (on the scale of Mel Gibson incidents, this doesn't even register), a game of complimenting Salma Hayek on the one thing she's never heard in her 60 years on earth, Tom Hardy's new rap album, Jonah Hill's white belt jiu jitsu bravado and whether he'd actually beat Jason Bateman's ass, the Eddie Bravo black eye that made Bert walk out of a jiu jitsu class without ever taking his jeans off, and the Times Square Stabber whose fat padding made every taser completely ineffective and whose stabbing motion made this incident appear beyond ridiculous at first. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 338 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-426-2537, 1-800-697-3738. Connecticut: call 888-789-7777, visit https://CCPG.org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. Twenty one plus. Void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get Bonus bets that expire in seven days OR Trade with DraftKings Predictions to get Predictions Dollars that expire in one year. Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable Rewards issued as Fifty dollar click-to-claims every seven days for twenty-one days. Terms at https://dkng.co/offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on Sportsbook, Predictions, and Free-to-Play Sports Contest availability. Varies by State. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:18 - Jelly Roll Called Trump A Fat Pig on Kimmel 00:15:49 - Mel Gibson's Sign Language Incident & Cancel Culture 00:22:32 - Childhood Bedtimes & Panic Attacks 00:33:38 - Putting Kids to Bed & Bert's Sleep Anxiety Deep Dive 00:41:44 - Bert Forgot How to Yawn and Had a 36-Hour Panic Attack 00:51:25 - Salma Hayek At 60 00:55:47 - Tom Hardy's Album, Shapeshifters & Jonah Hill's White Belt Energy 01:05:56 - The Times Square Waddling Stabber Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
9 sep.

Cool Guys, Slick Guys, Neat Guys w/Caitlin Peluffo

See Caitlin on tour by going to https://www.caitlinpeluffo.com for tickets and check out her special Prosciutto Rose on YouTube SPONSORS: New DraftKings customers, sign up with code MOM spend five bucks to get $200 in rewards within 21 days - includes all markets. Right now, when you buy two months of BlueChew Gold, you get the third for FREE with promo code YMH. https://bluechew.com Sign up for your free trial at https://shopify.com/ymh Tom's holding down the Mommy Dome this week with comedian Caitlin Peluffo, fresh off the Funny AF finals and out on the road with a brand new hour. She explains why a comedy competition full of fifteen-year veterans hit harder than any late night set, why stand up is infinitely harder than making a movie, and how the whole thing got her out of debt. Then Tom finds out she's single and decides to fix it, spending the rest of the episode presenting her with some eligible bachelors pulled straight from the cool guy pile: a man doing bathroom talk about Pepsi, a suitor who will beat up anyone who interrupts a conversation with a laptop, a Vancouver man out of smokes, an apple pie enthusiast, a flat earther explaining how GPS works, and a devoted gentleman leaving Julia good morning voicemails. Along the way Caitlin admits she bit a wart off her own finger, Tom delivers a passionate PSA about going into credit card debt for teeth and getting your skin tags removed for the rest of us, and the two of them dissect M. Night Shyamalan's cringe YouTube launch on his sad little bench and how it's not that dissimilar from the all-time original, Garth Brooks joining Facebook. Plus: Horrible or Hilarious with an old man scooting into a pool, a lightning strike survivor apologizing on a stranger's porch, and an arm snapping in a pub. We also get a long overdue cool guy update on Tony Johns, who is making history from the Cayuga County jailhouse. Enjoy! Your Mom’s House Ep. 876 https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER, 1-800-MYRESET. Connecticut: call 888-789-7777, visit https://CCPG.org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. 21+. Void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get Bonus bets that expire in seven days OR Trade with DraftKings Predictions to get Predictions Dollars that expire in one year. Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable Rewards issued as $50 click-to-claims every seven days for 21 days. Terms at https://dkng.co/offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on Sportsbook, Predictions, and Free-to-Play Sports Contest availability. Varies by State. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:15 - Caitlin Peluffo Killed At The Funny AF Finals 00:08:56 - Opening Clip: Why Do You Feel Better On A Friday? 00:14:46 - Go Into Debt For Teeth & A Skin Tag PSA 00:21:41 - Wild Girls: The Double Felony Hit And Run 00:27:24 - More Cool Suitors 00:31:43 - Bengals, 49ers & Josh Allen's Wholesome Smile 00:35:36 - M. Night Shyamalan Joins YouTube 00:43:47 - Horrible Or Hilarious 00:55:53 - Horse On Desk & GPS Guy 00:59:39 - Oh I'll Make Ya Come 01:01:36 - Looking For Girls 01:02:35 - Unk Shine 01:04:52 - Good Morning Julia 01:07:18 - A Message From Tony Johns 01:10:24 - Caitlin Picks A Suitor 01:14:24 - Wrap Up 01:15:09 - Closing Song - "Good Morning Julia" by Gaping Dad Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
31 aug.

Breaking Down The Barstool Brawl

SPONSORS: https://dkng.co/bears New DraftKings customers, sign up with code BEARS spend five bucks to get $200 in rewards within 21 days, includes all markets. For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://hims.com/bears If your revenues are at least in the seven figures, go to https://netsuite.ai/bears. Visit https://Betterhelp.com/BEARS. Get started with ShipStation today and get sixty days free at https://ShipStation.com, with code cave. Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer are back in the cave and surprise surprise, Bert opens with a confession: he wishes he'd never quit drinking. What follows is a full inventory of the modern male brain, the online pastor Tom watches every morning to get inspired, why 17-year-olds have no business being nostalgic for anything, the exact moment each of them gave up on playing pro sports, and why comedians never seem to get that same reality check. The guys break down Bert's Whoop addiction and the blood clot that started it, get talked into a completely fictional performance-enhancing stack for a 5K, fall in love with bull riding legend JB Mauney, pitch the worst sponsorship idea in podcast history, and watch a food delivery driver take on the entire Barstool office. Then it's cringe cancellation, sobriety influencers, 4:23 a.m. morning routine guys, and a long, very funny argument about which movie stars are actually men and which ones just look at themselves in the mirror. Plus Bert's new fragrance obsession, the colognes of Napoleon, Elvis and JFK, Sebastian Maniscalco's four seasonal robes, Joe Rogan's splits, Billy Bob Thornton at the CMAs, and a big announcement about the future of the show. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 337 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Bet with DK Sportsbook: Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-GAMBLER, 1-800-MYRESET. Connecticut: call 888-789-7777, visit https://CCPG.org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. 21+. Void in Canada. Event contract trading with DraftKings Predictions involves risk of loss. Availability varies. Predictions offer void in New York. Bet to get Bonus bets that expire in seven days. Trade to get Predictions Dollars that expire in one year. $50 in rewards issued every seven days via click to claim for twenty-one days. One non-withdrawable reward redeemable. Terms at https://dkng.co/offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on Sportsbook, Predictions, and Free-to-Play Sports Contest availability. Varies by State. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:17 - The Jewish Joke Bert Can't Tell On Stage 00:04:26 - Pastor Manning 00:09:09 - Period Sex Confessions & Giving Up On Sports 00:21:50 - Nobody Quits Comedy Or Drinking 00:31:31 - Whoop Obsession, The Blood Clot, & Tren 00:37:09 - JB Mauney & The PBR 00:44:27 - Motorcycles & The 12 O'clock Boys Sponsorship 00:46:56 - The Barstool Helmet Fight 00:52:58 - Fighting Women 00:56:13 - Cringe Cancellation 01:01:35 - Tom's Pep Talk & Bert's Therapy 01:05:05 - Sobriety Influencers & Morning Routine Guys 01:09:04 - Cringey Actors vs. Real Men 01:19:33 - Bert's Fragrance Obsession 01:30:00 - Drakkar Noir Nostalgia 01:36:49 - Sebastian Maniscalco Is A Study 01:40:04 - Bert Meets Billy Bob At The CMAs 01:44:26 - 2 Bears Is Going Back To Weekly Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
−5 d

Ari Matti Goes To Barcelona, Spain

Follow Ari on Instagram here: https://www.instagram.com/arimatticomedy/ SPONSORS: -If you or someone you know experienced serious mental health struggles as a result of social media use, you may be entitled to a potential recovery of over $1,000. Visit https://morganmorganpa.sjv.io/c/7729588/3841482/23429?sharedid=you-be-trippin to submit a claim now. -Start your new morning ritual & get up to 43% off your @‌MUDWTR with code TRIPPIN at https://mudwtr.com/TRIPPIN ! #mudwtrpod On this week's episode of You Be Trippin', Ari Matti is BACK! This time around Ari and Ari talked about the time Matti was spent his covid quarantine in Spain. This episode is exactly what you think it's going to be. As Matti put it their ADHD's don't line up. It's pure chaos, but there are some great stories mixed in there. Ari on his bike suffering through the hills on the Spanish coast. His infamous turd story is the peak. Buckle up and try your best to follow along. Hasta luego! You Be Trippin' Ep. 136 https://www.instagram.com/arishaffir https://www.instagram.com/youbetrippinpod https://arishaffir.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:09:09 - Boat Travel 00:17:53 - Estonian Festival 00:25:53 - Stuck in Spain 00:39:09 - Nepal 00:44:33 - Traveling by Bike 00:50:56 - Horsing Around 00:56:45 - The Infamous Turd 01:07:45 - Comedy & Animal Tourism 01:19:26 - Ari in London 01:29:30 - Outro Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
−1 d

Rabbi Dave Smith Fails The Anti-Semite Test

🎟️ Duncan Trussell Tour: http://duncantrussell.com/tour🎙️ Kurt Metzger Tour: https://punchup.live/kurtmetzger🎤 Follow Dave Smith: https://www.instagram.com/theproblemdavesmith/?hl=en🎤 Follow Dr. Heather Lynn: https://www.instagram.com/DrHeatherLynn/ Check out Hoop and Huddle, YMH Studios' new comedy sports show, hosted by comedians Luke Touma & Nate Marshall. Two friends talking basketball, football, and whatever ruined their weekend. Less "analysts breaks down the tape," more "your boys yelling at the TV." https://www.youtube.com/@HoopandHuddle SPONSORS: One thing to pack, five ways to power! Get 10% Off @‌Ridge with code MYSTERYBOYS at https://www.Ridge.com/MYSTERYBOYS #Ridgepod Don’t sleep on @‌ultrapouches. New customers get 15% Off with code MYSTERY at https://takeultra.com! #UltraPouches #ad Right now, when you buy two months of BlueChew Gold, you get the third for FREE with promo code MYSTERY. https://BlueChew.com One app. Every sport. All 50 states. New DraftKings customers, sign up with code MYSTERY spend five bucks to get two hundred in rewards within 21 days - includes all markets. Welcome to Mystery Boys, the podcast from YMH Studios hosted by Kurt Metzger and Duncan Trussell. This week comedian Dave Smith of Part of the Problem sits down with the boys and immediately gets handed a Certificate of Appreciation printed on important government paper, which leads to Frank Abagnale being a liar, why you can buy a doctorate at Staples, and the Turkish human trafficker who became Santa Claus. From there the investigation runs through the Lindsay Clancy case as an MKUltra distraction, school shooter pills and SSRI onboarding, the Pulse nightclub shooting as blowback, the Daily Wire's latest romp Run Hide Fight along with the new Zionist propaganda pivot, Tucker Carlson's nicotine pouches, Courtney Love's dad, the CIA's fav Bohemian Grove, plus, the Prussian origin of compulsory school, kindergarten, and the Bellamy salute. Then the boys make Dave take the American Jewish Committee's online anti-Semitism quiz live on camera, and he finishes at a comfortable four out of ten. The mysteries get heavier when historian and author Dr. Heather Lynn calls in to lay out the symbolic reading of the Butler shooting and the Charlie Kirk killing: the pierced right ear of the Hebrew servant in Exodus 21, priestly consecration of ear, hand and foot, Chabad Lubavitch as an intel cult, Masonic passion plays, Albert Pike, the Blue Lodge, and why 33 is everywhere. Dr. Lynn also dismantles Zecharia Sitchin and the Anunnaki, the Sumerian problem, cuneiform as a language isolate, the Shining Ones, the black-headed ones and the red ocher people, the Sumerian Noah and his breakaway civilization, the Younger Dryas, and the Garden of Eden read as an ancient slave revolt. Also: Dolly Parton's letter to Eminem, Eminem's alleged descent from Golden Dawn magician Samuel Liddell MacGregor Mathers, Roseanne Barr at Thanksgiving, Sabbatai Zevi and the Frankists, the Haitian Revolution as a Freemason project and Haiti paying reparations to France until 1985, Prince Hall Freemasonry, Joe Rogan's Alpha Brain ingredient list, the TikTok Shop selling suppressors as kitchen utensils to Tanner, Hypno Dolly, the Lockheed Martin video game, Northrop Grumman leaking specs on Discord, and the new Mystery Boys supplement, Beefzos. This is not a conspiracy podcast. This is a mystery appreciation podcast. Mystery Boys Ep. 18 https://www.instagram.com/duncantrussell https://www.instagram.com/kurtmetzgercomedy https://www.instagram.com/mysteryboyspodcast https://store.ymhstudios.com Gambling Problem? Call 1-800-426-2537, 1-800-697-3738. Connecticut: call 888-789-7777, visit http://ccpg.org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. Twenty-one plus. Void in Canada. Bet with DraftKings Sportsbook to get Bonus bets that expire in 7 days OR Trade with DraftKings Predictions to get Predictions Dollars that expire in 1 year. Event contract trading involves risk of loss. Predictions offer void in New York. Non-withdrawable Rewards issued as 50 dollar click-to-claims every 7 days for 21 days. Terms at http://dkng.co/offer. Limited time offer. Nationwide based on Sportsbook, Predictions, and Free-to-Play Sports Contest availability. Varies by State. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:04:42 - The 'Zalom' bit (Kurt's Grok-made Hebrew) 00:06:15 - Balaam and the talking donkey 00:07:35 - The Lindsay Clancy case + the Candace Owens / Andrew Wilson debate 00:16:37 - Pulse nightclub and blowback 00:21:57 - The Zionist-propaganda pivot 00:34:43 - Kurt's doomsday-cult upbringing 00:36:48 - School was invented in Prussia 00:40:05 - Reading Dolly Parton's letter to Eminem 00:42:51 - Roseanne stories 00:48:35 - The AJC 'Translate Hate' antisemitism quiz 01:02:50 - Dr. Heather Lynn on the Butler shooting 01:10:49 - Epstein files, Charlie Kirk, and 'positive evidence' 01:16:19 - Crowley's Liber 4, theatrics, and the 33s 01:21:08 - Haiti, Prince Hall Freemasonry, and the only successful slave revolt 01:24:48 - The Anunnaki and Zecharia Sitchin 01:38:27 - The Garden of Eden, Enki, and the tree of life 01:42:32 - Tanner's targeted ads: Hypno Dollar and the TikTok Shop 01:49:36 - Defense-contractor video games and Discord leaks 01:50:56 - Reading the Alpha Brain ingredients 01:54:53 - Kars4Kids and the Andrew Wilson GoFundMe Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
2 sep.

The Sleaze Bag Starter Kit w/ Ian Fidance

SPONSORS: Right now, when you buy two months of BlueChew Gold, you get the third for FREE with promo code YMH. https://bluechew.com Find your next fall favorites at Quince. Download the Quince app for app-exclusive offers, or go to https://Quince.com/MOM. Get free shipping on your order and 365-day returns. Now available in Canada and the UK, too. Sign up for your free trial at https://shopify.com/ymh Tom is off this week, so Christina is joined by the one and only Ian Fidance, host of Ian Do on YouTube, on the road every week for the rest of the year, tickets at https://IanFidance.com. Ian arrives with flowers and a full divorce care package to usher Christina into the dating world, which leads to a conversation about the sleazebag starter kit he should be selling on tour, the darts she's allowed to rip now, and the gout-into-kidney-stones saga that put Ian on a Montreal hotel floor an hour before a taping. Then it's clip time: the horny cowboy is back with tips nobody asked for, a long-overdue update on Tony Johns and his homeless era, the whistling man who has genuinely figured out life, and a piss gadget that raises real questions. Ian pitches the only logical next step, move every cool guy into one house, with Christina as the RA handing out chores and taking away privileges. Also: a spy explains how important mouth stuff is in espionage, Christina finds out what dating requires in 2026 versus 2005, the suitor hotline delivers three voicemails and one very promising mechanic named Chris, Ian gets choke slammed at AEW, and a QVC host says something beautiful without realizing it. Enjoy! Your Mom’s House Ep. 875 https://tomsegura.com/tourhttps://christinap.com/https://store.ymhstudios.comhttps://www.reddit.com/r/yourmomshousepodcast Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro00:02:01 - The Divorce Care Package00:04:41 - Ian's Gout Turned Into Kidney Stones00:07:54 - Opening Clip: The Horny Cowboy Rides Again00:15:08 - Tony Johns Update00:21:37 - Ralph The Whistler Update00:26:25 - Clip: Pissing Gadget00:27:01 - The YMH Cool Guy House00:30:51 - Clip: Russian Spy Tips00:36:30 - The Horny Hotline00:43:32 - Ian Do00:44:31 - TikToks00:49:35 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
24 aug.

Stavvy Called Us Out

SPONSORS: Look for Mountain Dew in stores near you at https://mountaindew.com Thanks to MANSCAPED for sponsoring today’s video! Get The Beard Hedger Plus for 15% OFF + Free Shipping with code “BEARS” at https://Manscaped.com! Start your free trial at https://SHOPIFY.COM/bears For simple, online access to personalized and affordable care for Hair Loss, Weight Loss, and more, visit https://hims.com/bears for your free online visit. This episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. Visit https://Betterhelp.com/BEARS. Head to https://FACTORMEALS.com/bears50off and use code bears50off to get 50 percent off and 1 free breakfast item per box for 1 year, while supplies last until 10/31/2026. https://babbel.com/BEARS for up to 60% off. Rules and restrictions may apply. This week on 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer celebrate Bert officially entering the Guinness Book of World Records for The Machine, possibly the most performed signature story in comedy history, and immediately spiral into the comedy record arms race: Shane Gillis' 77,000-person show, Nate Bargatze's 2 million tickets, the Dane Cook vs. Dave Chappelle longest-set war, and Bert's plan to lock 75,000 paid "hostages" inside Raymond James Stadium and perform for ten straight hours. Then the Bears respond to Stavros Halkias calling out comics who fly private, and explain why he's absolutely right: nobody gets funnier on a private jet. From there, Bert declares Busboys, the new Theo Von and David Spade movie, the greatest piece of art he's ever seen, and Tom finally watches The Odyssey, only for Bert to officially turn on it over the Travis Scott cameo. Plus: Gaddafi's all-female Amazonian Guard, plane-crash hypotheticals, Chimp Empire is the best reality show ever made, Mick Jagger on fame, and why the Bears are grateful they got famous late. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 336 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:18 - Comedians Getting Guinness Records 00:07:24 - The Attendance Record Arms Race 00:18:09 - Stavvy Says Private Jets Don't Make You Funnier 00:24:25 - Lunch Pail Phonies & Staying Honest 00:35:39 - Busboys Is A Secret Masterpiece 00:41:55 - Tom Finally Saw The Odyssey 01:03:45 - Por Osos At Frenchies & MacDill 01:07:29 - The Sexiest Military & Plane Crash Hypotheticals 01:12:08 - Chimp Empire 01:15:26 - Leanne's Birthday & The Black Crowes 01:20:28 - Mick Jagger On Fame 01:24:18 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices
10 aug.

Tom & Bert's Brutally Honest Odyssey Review

SPONSORS: Don’t let your mind get in the way of a good time. Discover your options at https://BlueChew.com Shopify: Turns out you don’t need a real job. Build your own business with a free trialat http://shopify.com/bears Head to https://acorns.com/bears or download the Acorns app to get started. New DraftKings customers, sign up with code BEARS spend five bucks to get one hundred fifty in rewards within 14 days, includes all markets. Over at https://dkng.co/bears. For a limited time, our listeners get 50% off FOR LIFE, Free Shipping, AND 3 Free Gifts at Mars Men at http://Mengotomars.com. This week on 2 Bears, 1 Cave, Tom Segura and Bert Kreischer are back in the cave after eight weeks apart, and they open with a full review of The Odyssey, Lupita Nyong'o as Helen of Troy, Matt Damon's rogue Boston accent, and why Jon Bernthal is Hollywood's most legendary napper. From there, Bert unveils his billionaire rebrand (Sabah shoes, LBJ Stetsons, and the top five shoes billionaires wear this fall) before getting real about sobriety, anxiety attacks, and self-diagnosing 12 terminal illnesses in a single month. The Bears also spiral into the movies that blindsided them, Primal Fear, The Sixth Sense, Memento, Fight Club, and why the DIY hits like Obsession prove Hollywood is in another pivot moment. Plus: Project Hail Mary vs. the 15-hour audiobook, Bert's theory that this is the funniest (and most jacked) generation of comics ever, college football weight-room PRs, Jason Kelce showing up for a 9 AM bench session, and a meet & greet at MacDill Air Force Base August 14. If you missed the Bears, this one's for you. 2 Bears, 1 Cave Ep. 335 https://tomsegura.com/tour https://www.bertbertbert.com/tour https://store.ymhstudios.com Bet with DK Sportsbook: Gambling Problem? Call 1-800 GAMBLER, 1-800 MY RESET. Connecticut: call 888-789-7777, visit http://CCPG.org. On behalf of Boot Hill Casino in Kansas. Bet tax pass-through may apply in Illinois. Twenty one plus. Void in Canada. Event contract trading with DraftKings Predictions involves risk of loss. Availability varies. Predictions offer void in New York. Bet to get Bonus bets that expire in seven days. Trade to get Predictions Dollars that expire in one year. Fifty dollars in rewards issued every seven days via click to claim for fourteen days. One non-withdrawable reward redeemable. Nationwide based on Sportsbook, Predictions, and Free-to-Play Sports Contest availability. Varies by State. Terms at http://dkng.co/offer. Limited time offer. Chapters 00:00:00 - Intro 00:00:26 - The Bears Review The Odyssey 00:10:34 - Bears At MacDill Air Force Base 00:11:15 - Project Hail Mary & Bert's Cute Shoes 00:23:37 - Bert's Drinking Again 00:33:36 - Obsession & The New Hollywood Pivot 00:39:00 - The Best Twist Movies Ever 00:52:33 - Everyone's Got Abs 00:56:02 - College Weight Room Energy 01:00:44 - Wrap Up Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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