Horror Weekly

Brian Schell and Kevin L. Knights
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Join Kevin and Brian for a weekly podcast episode. Every Friday, the guys release both a video and audio podcast episode that covers everything new in horror, along with a handful of great (and awful) movie reviews! www.horrorweekly.com

  1. −6 D

    28 Years Later: The Bone Temple, Primate, Predator Badlands, Lake Placid: Legacy, and Godzilla Tokyo S.O.S.

    We’ll finish up the Lake Placid movies this week with “Legacy” from 2018. We’ll also continue our Godzilla sequence with “Tokyo S.O.S.” from 2004. Then we’ll watch three hot new films: “Primate,” “Predator Badlands,” and “28 Years Later: The Bone Temple,” all from 2026. New Book! The Horror Guys Guide to the Tremors Films and TV Series All this as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #53, is available! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com Mainstream Films: 2018 Lake Placid: Legacy * Director: Darrell Roodt * Writers: Johnathon Lloyd Walker, Matt Venables, and Jeremy Smith * Stars: Katherine Barrell, Tim Rozon, Sai Bennett, and Joe Pantoliano * Runtime: 93 minutes (or 1 hour 33 minutes) * YouTube Trailer Link: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone This is a sequel to “Lake Placid vs Anaconda” as well as a sequel to the Lake Placid standalone movies. A group of eco-warrior urban explorers FAFO when they break into a fenced off decommissioned research compound. It wasn’t anything we haven’t seen before, but it’s well put together. It moves well and entertains. Spoilery Synopsis We open in Seattle, WA, where four people sit in a tiny car and conspire about exposing corporate greed. And urban exploration. And hacking. As they break into Wenoco Corp, we cut back and forth with a man running through the woods, terrified. Wenco Corp looks like a Star Trek set on the inside. The eco-terrorists drop a “Wenoco = Death” banner off the roof. Meanwhile, something unseen eats the man in the woods. Credits roll. Alice doesn’t approve of the urban explorer/eco-terrorist stuff that her sister Jade leads. Sam, Billy, and Spencer are just in it for the rush. Sam gets a challenge from Dane for “one last quest” that has a $100,000 prize for the first one in. The place they need to go is off-limits, even deleted from Google Earth. It’s supposed to be a place where a toxic spill happened twenty-something years ago. Pennie and Travis don’t want to go anywhere near a place with radiation, if that story is even true. The group arrives at the electric fence, and there’s definitely no radiation. The electric fence doesn’t work or is turned off for some reason. When they get inside, they do soil samples; there’s no contamination here, either. Why the fence? Pennie and Travis drop the others off at a dock and promise to wait 30 minutes before they leave them. The others walk through a construction site. They soon find Dane’s camp, but Dane isn’t there. The place is wrecked, but they find a camera. It shows Dane being chased by some kind of monster. Then they find body parts, but Spencer thinks it’s all a prank– until they find half of Gomez, Dane’s assistant. They all run back to the boat, which suffers an accident, along with Travis. Everyone talks, whines, screams, and argues all at the same time. The group finds a dark tunnel with a grate that’s been broken through and decides it’s a good idea to go inside. The group gets split up. Billy, Spencer, and Pennie head back to the dock while Sam, Alice, Jade, go deeper into the facility. The inside group finds a lab with power while the outside group tries to boost their cellphone signal to call for help on the dock. Inside, the group learns that the facility was breeding giant crocodiles for some reason. Outside, Spencer and Pennie get eaten. Sam and his group find Dane, still alive, down in the tunnels. They also run into Henderson, whom Dane has tied up for getting them all into this situation. He used to work for the corporation and explains about the genetically modified formerly extinct species that was supposed to cure cancer. He sounds believable with his motivations. Billy calls 911 with his boosted phone, but he’s doubtful they could trace to source. Billy then loses his head, so he’s not gonna try again. In the confusion, Henderson sneaks away. Everyone else has to swim through a flooded tunnel for no obvious reason. The monster catches Dane and tears him up. Henderson, in the meantime, wanders right into the big crocodile’s main nest and is torn in half. Sam comes up with a cockamamie plan to blow up the whole place by sacrificing himself with canisters of propane as the two girls run back the way they came. Sam’s plan fails non-spectacularly. Alice faces the monster eye-to-eye, but then Jade gets in one of the construction machines and starts it right up after being outside, abandoned for twenty-five years. She pins the crocodile and then covers it in fuel. The croc goes boom! The two girls then swim off the island, but then we see they’re being followed… Brian’s Commentary It plays fast and loose with the lore from the previous films, as the whole corporate angle only marginally applied to the “Vs” film. On the other hand, the lab and facility were nice sets and they probably hoped there would be more sequels. There’s supposed to be just one crocodile, but it’s both simultaneously inside the tunnel and out eating Billy at the same time. Its size also fluctuates depending on where it is. It’s all fairly predictable in every way, but it wasn’t boring. If you’re looking for more CGI-croc action, this movie… exists. Kevin’s Commentary The poster is especially cool for this one. I had a fundamental dislike of the eco-arrogant characters, which made it difficult to root for them. The croc tended to move from place to place and size to size as plot required (though we do find out at the very end it wasn’t really just one). And it wasn’t anything we haven’t seen before. But those issues aside, I thought the whole thing was pretty well made and entertaining. The pacing is good without much down time, and the settings are great. 2003 Godzilla: Tokyo S.O.S. * Director: Masaaki Tezuka * Writers: Masaaki Tezuka, Masahiro Yokotani * Stars: Noboru Kaneko, Miho Yoshioka, Mitsuki Koga, Masami Nagasawa, Chihiro Otsuka, Koh Takasugi, Hiroshi Koizumi, Akira Nakao * Runtime: 91 minutes (1 hour, 31 minutes) * YouTube Trailer Link: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone Mothra and the fairies are back to warn Japan they need to return the bones of Godzilla used to make Mechagodzilla to the ocean to rebalance nature. But they repair Mechagodzilla just in time for Godzilla’s return, so there’s a big creature battle. We both thought this one looked good, but it was only middling. A bit on the bland side. Spoilery Synopsis We open on Mechagodzilla, back in the base as the people do checks on the system. We then cut to the deep sea, where Godzilla wakes up. In the Caroline Islands, there is wind. In Hawaii, the Americans detect something on the radar– it’s Mothra! Credits roll. The news reporter reminds us about the battle with Godzilla in the previous film– Mechgodzilla is still under repair from that one. Godzilla hasn’t been spotted in months, but he’s still out there somewhere. Yoshi talks to his little nephew, Shun, about being a fighter pilot. He’d love to pilot the Mech-G. The grandfather is Professor Chujo. Suddenly, the two mini-fairies show up in the living room and want to talk to him. The old man knows them from way back in the first Mothra adventure, 43 years ago. They want him to send Godzilla’s bones back to the sea and not use them to build weapons like Mech-G. Yoshi argues that we need Mechagodizilla for protection, but the girls say Mothra will protect them– or else Mothra will destroy humanity. There’s some debate on whether or not the presence of Godzilla’s bones is what attracted the new Godzilla in the previous film. Maybe they should get rid of those bones. Grandpa Chujo tells Shun about his original adventure with Mothra, and he’s got photos to back it up. At the base, Yoshi and Azusa, from the previous film, know each other and talk about piloting. Yoshi goes in and looks at Mechgodzilla while remembering the fairies’ threat. Chujo talks to the Prime Minister about cancelling the Mechagodzilla project. The leader has no other defenses against Godzilla and the monsters; they need MechaGodzilla, even if its absolute zero freeze-ray hasn’t been repaired yet. Some giant creature washed up on shore, dead. It’s a giant sea turtle, but it was killed by something even bigger– like Godzilla. Meanwhile, Godzilla runs into, and rips apart, an American submarine. Yoshi gets called to testify about the meeting with the Mothra fairies and what they promised. Meanwhile, Godzilla is heading toward Tokyo again. Shun steals Chujo’s Mothra-calling stone and tries to signal Mothra for help. It works very quickly. Godzilla is heading straight for the Mecha base; his bones are attracting him. Inside, the men scramble to get Mechagodzilla working. Mothra attacks Godzilla as the fairies sing to an egg back on their island. The big Mothra gets injured, and the humans decide they have to launch Mechagodzilla to assist. Soon, the two Zillas are fighting, and many buildings in Tokyo pay the price. Mothra gets shot down just as his replacement egg hatches into two Mothras! The two soon set out across the ocean. Yoshi drives around the deserted city looking for Chujo and Shun. The worms arrive and start spraying Godzilla with their silky strings. Meanwhile, old-Mothra is still alive and giving them advice– at least until she gets nuclear-blasted by Godzilla. Mechagodzilla is dead. It can’t get up. Yoshi calls the commander and says he can fix it. What choice do they have? The fairies want Mecha-G dead, but they help Yoshi on the way to the repair anyway. He gets the problem fixed, but he also finds out that he’s trapped inside the thing. The fight continues, and Mechagodzilla’s got some surprises to use against the bog lizard. The hyper-maser really annoys Godzilla. Mechagodzikka and Yoshi decide to stand by and let the Mothra worms disable Godzilla. The fairies insist that the Godzilla bones

    29 min

  2. 22 FEB.

    Lake Placid: 1, 2, 3, The Final Chapter, and Lake Placid Vs. Anaconda

    Back in episode 372, we did all the rest of the Anaconda films. This time, we swap over and do all the “Lake Placid” films, including the crossover with Anaconda. We’ll cover the newer “Lake Placid: Legacy” next week. All this, as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #53, is available! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com Mainstream Films: 1999 Lake Placid * Director: Steve Miner * Writers: David E. Kelley * Stars: Bill Pullman, Bridget Fonda, Oliver Platt, Brendan Gleeson, and Betty White * Runtime: 82 minutes * YouTube Trailer Link: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone It’s a giant creature feature, set in a beautiful location. There’s a lot of violence and gore, but also a lot of dark humor - it’s not quite in the comedy genre, but there are a lot of chuckles to be had. The casting is excellent and added a lot to making the movie more watchable and entertaining. It was a fun watch. Spoilery Synopsis As credits roll, we see scenes of a very placid lake. The sheriff and a diver are out tagging beavers. The diver goes down and finds an underwater tunnel and checks it out. Turns out, it’s not a beaver nest. The sheriff, aboard the boat, pulls up about half of the diver. In New York City, Kelly explains to Myra that her boyfriend has dumped her; Myra already knows because she stole Kevin from her. Kevin comes in and talks about a probable-bear attack and wants to send Kelly to Maine to investigate a tooth they found in the diver. She’s not really gung-ho about field work, but has no choice but to investigate. Near Lake Placid, Sheriff Hank welcomes Jack Wells, with Fish & Game, to investigate the animal attack. Kelly, Jack, and Hank go out to the lake and talk to an old woman who is the only person who lives directly on the lake. Mrs. Bickerman says her husband died two years ago from an assisted suicide. Kelly, in the meantime, does not enjoy the natural beauty of the place. “I have good hygiene; I’m not welcome here.” Hector Cyr, a rich mythology nut, shows up in a helicopter. He’s obsessed with crocodiles, so that’s weird. There shouldn’t be any crocodiles in this lake, but he’s pretty confident that’s what they have. They go out in canoes, and something knocks over one of the boats. They also find the diver’s toe. Hector’s a party animal, and sets up quite a campsite. Hank doesn’t like him at all. The next day, they use all their equipment as Hector and Jack go diving for the creature. Meanwhile, the monster attacks the boat with Kelly and Hank. They’re fine, but the deputy, on the other hand, loses his head. Hector gives a ridiculous speech about dreaming he’d lost his head. Suddenly, a huge bear attacks! That goes nowhere because even more suddenly, a giant crocodile leaps out of the water and eats the bear– whole. Finally, Kelly decides she’s having a good time. In the morning, they all go croc-hunting. They find another severed head just on the edge of Mrs. Bickerman’s place. They watch as the old woman leads a cow to the beach and feeds it to the enormous crocodile. Mrs. Bickerman admits she’s been feeding the thing for six years; it’s a sort of pet. It was what killed her husband. Meanwhile, Hector goes swimming again and comes face to face with the big croc. The crocodile lets him get onto the helicopter, but then tries to eat that. Hector wants to sedate and capture the crocodile. He doesn’t want it killed, which Fish & Game will do. He’s persuasive. They use one of Mrs. Bickerman’s cows, dangling from a helicopter, as bait. Eventually, the croc takes the bait and crashes the helicopter. It comes up on land and menaces everyone. The crocodile manages to get stuck inside the helicopter and can’t get out. They tranquilize it, so it’s all good. Suddenly, a second crocodile shows up, and Hank gets to shoot that one explosively. As things wind down, Hank and Hector drive off to the hospital. Kelly and Jack get together. Some time passes and we see Mrs. Bickerman, out at the dock, feeding a new batch of baby crocodiles… Brian’s Commentary The interplay between Hank and Hector is comedy gold. Actually, this movie is only good because of the stellar cast. The croc is a combination of CGI and practical effects, but it’s all very effective. It’s a great mix of giant-animal horror and comedy. It was successful and then led to a whole batch of sequels. Kevin’s Commentary I agree with Brian, it was casting done right that added a lot to the movie. It could have been a lot lamer than it was. Okay, it wasn’t that lame, it was pretty entertaining. And the humor helped a lot. The croc is a practical effect - a giant puppet - in many of its scenes, which was much better than having it be purely CGI. Though the CGI is quite good too. Trivia says the croc actually has less than four minutes of screen time. Somehow, I had missed seeing this before now. I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed it. 2007 Lake Placid 2 * Director: David Flores * Writers: Todd Hurvitz and Howie Miller * Stars: John Schneider, Sarah Lafleur, Sam McMurray, Chad Michael Collins, Alicia Ziegler, and Cloris Leachman * Runtime: 88 minutes * YouTube Trailer Link: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone The first movie was enough of a success that they made a sequel. They embraced the CGI this time, lowered the quality of casting, and generally cheapened everything as a direct to TV SyFy production. The gore was a step up, while the humor and pacing were a step down. It was barely okay, but not the win the first one was. Spoilery Synopsis After the credits, we open two men in a boat talking about how many people have disappeared on this lake. Soon, it’s one man in the boat. Sheriff Riley listens to his son Scott complaining about being there after a custody battle. The EPA man comes to the office and tells them about his partner being eaten. They think it’s all a joke until he shows them the man’s chewed arm. Emily, from Fish & Wildlife, arrives, and she has history with Sheriff Riley. The group goes out on a boat to see where the attack took place, and they talk about the crazy old woman who used to feed crocodiles on the lake. They find a head and then go to talk to old Sadie. Sadie is the sister of the other Mrs. Bickerman. Sadie feeds the local newsman to her crocodile. Riley, Emily, and Frank soon see the crocodile when it smashes their boat. A CGI plane lands, and Struthers, a rich loon, arrives. He wants to hunt the crocodile. Meanwhile, Scott and Kerri meet in the woods, along with Thad and Larry. They head to the lake with her friends. He goes out for a walk alone and finds a nest with eggs. Thad breaks some eggs and soon pays for it. Riley and company tranquilize the croc and put it right to sleep. It’s not as asleep as it appears, as Deputy Dale and Frank soon learn. They set up some bait and lure in the croc, but they harpoon Struthers’s airplane instead. Working together, they kill the crocodile. After some celebrating, they all camp for the night. Scott, Larry, and Kelli are lost in the woods. A second croc attacks the camp and eats Ahmad, Struthers’s assistant. They go to see Mrs. Bickman, who tells them that there are three of the big crocodiles out there. Emily, Riley, and Struthers find the nest and take the eggs. They come across Scott and Kerri just after Larry gets eaten. Riley blows up a second croc, but the big one is still out there. Kerri and Scott feed Mrs. Bickman to the final croc– no, turns out there were really four of them. Emily hides in a tree trunk as Riley shoots the next croc. Struthers loses his head but blows up the final croc. Scott, Kerri, Riley, and Emily drive away. They drop Kerri and Scott off at home, and they kiss. Brian’s Commentary This was made for the SyFy Channel and never hit the theaters directly. All the “Teenagers” are way old and the acting is equally bad. It’s very cheaply made, with no corner left uncut. John Schneider is just “We have David Hasselhoff at home.” They lost nearly all the humor and went for a straight-up horror movie this time. The film overall is just pretty dull, even for a made-for-TV story. Kevin’s Commentary Everything about this sequel was a step down from the original. The crocodile, and some other elements, were very obvious CGI without the practical effects of the giant crocodile puppet. The cast, script, and pacing weren’t as good. All in all, the entertainment value was less. I didn’t hate it, but I didn’t enjoy it nearly as much as the first movie. 2010 Lake Placid 3 * Director: Griff Furst * Writers: David Reed * Stars: Colin Ferguson, Yancy Butler, Kirsty Mitchell, Kacey Clarke, Jordan Grehs, and Michael Ironside * Runtime: 96 minutes * YouTube Trailer Link: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone It’s more of the same as the last two films. With no one seeming to really be aware that the events of the two films happened or were anything to be concerned about. The CGI is bad and obvious, but it was a bit better than the second movie. It still wasn’t as good as the first. If you saw the first two, this one was a bit of an uptick. Spoilery Synopsis It’s the Black Lake Wildlife Area, and two hikers arrive at the lake. They go for a swim and hear growling. A bunch of little crocodiles eat them both. Nathan stands on the dock and has some kind of flashback to the previous film. Nathan, an EPA scientist, is old Mrs. Bickerman’s nephew, and he’s just inherited her cabin. The sheriff comes to visit Nathan, Susan, and their son, Connor. The sheriff tries to convince them that the crocodile incident will never happen again; he wants them to live here rather than sell the house. As they talk, Connor sees crocodiles outside and feeds them all… Two years later, Connor is still feeding the much-larger crocs. Susan leaves him with Vica, the babysitter. He sneaks out to the store to steal a big ba

    30 min

  3. 15 FEB.

    Bight, Seven Cemeteries, Troll 2, Pumpkinhead 4, and Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla

    We’ve got another mostly random mix this time around. We’ll start off with the weird BDSM-gone-wrong film, “Bight” from 2026. We’ll then watch Seven Samurai— no, “Seven Cemeteries” from 2024. We’ll force ourselves to watch the infamous “Troll 2,” finish up the franchise with “Pumpkinhead 4: Blood Feud,” and then continue our big lizard coverage with “Godzilla Against Mechagodzilla.” All this as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #53, is available! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com Mainstream Films: 2026 Bight * Directed by: Maiara Walsh * Written by: Cameron Cowperthwaite, Maiara Walsh * Stars: Cameron Cowperthwaite, Mark Hapka, Maya Stojan * Run Time: 1 Hour, 32 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone Two artsy couples get together for an evening of bondage, photography, sex, and emotional exploration. It takes a while, but it does eventually get to some horror-adjacent elements. It’s more of a drama thriller though, and it’s quite good. It wasn’t quite what either of us expected. Spoilery Synopsis Two people hug in the shower as they wash blood off each other’s bodies. Credits roll. Charlie gets a call from her boss, Ariana, and she’s not happy. Her artist boyfriend, Atticus, works in the living room. The couple is not getting along very well. They’re going to Sebastian’s party, but neither of them want to go to this one. Turns out, this party is just for them. Sebastian and Naomi have invited only Charlie and Atticus. Charlie keeps getting texts as the men talk about photography. Charlie and Atticus argue some more, and then we see that Sebastian and Naomi aren’t getting along so well either. Sebastian gets all pretentious during dinner and we get a flashback to the last time the four got together; it was an orgy. This time, he wants to use his two guests as nude models. Charlie is all in, but Atticus doesn’t want to participate; they’ve done this before, and he doesn’t want to repeat last time. They decide to go for it. Sebastian puts something in everyone’s tea. He explains the rules of his work with ropes and then everyone splits up to get ready. Naomi ties Atticus’s hands behind his back as the drugs start to kick in. Soon, they’re both bound up, naked, with ropes, and Sebastian starts to take pictures. Naomi, in the meantime, covers them with red paint. Neither Charlie nor Atticus are really into this, and both are really uncomfortable, but it’s hard to argue with Sebastian. As they all take a break, Sebastian gets with Charlie, while Naomi goes for Atticus. We then cut to a bedroom scene with Atticus tied up on the floor and Naomi suspended by ropes from the ceiling above them. Sebastian has sex with Charlie as the other two watch in restraints. Naomi wants to be released, and Sebastian says no way; he’s punishing her for having sex with Atticus. This is all some kind of elaborate revenge plot by Sebastian against the cheaters. When Atticus realizes Naomi drugged him, he urges Sebastian to spin her ropes some more. Charlie has seen enough and wants to leave, so Sebastian just knocks her out. He puts her in a gas mask and ties her up. He then cuts Naomi’s throat and lets her bleed all over Atticus, who is still tied up beneath her. As Sebastian menaces Charlie, Atticus breaks out of his ropes and intervenes. In the struggle, Sebastian gets stabbed numerous times with a box cutter and then strangled with a rope. Atticus apologizes to Charlie and unties her. The two of them then clean up the mess. Then when they get to their car in the morning they have wild sex; their romance has rekindled. Some time later, at one of Atticus’s art shows, he reveals his new works; at least in his mind, Sebastian is still with him. Brian’s Commentary Bight: a loop of rope, as distinct from the rope’s ends. This film looks great. It’s colorful and is very interestingly shot. The dialogue is clunky and pretentious, but the characters are all “artists,” so that’s probably just realism. It took a very long time to get to anything that might be considered horror, but it did get there eventually. It’s weird, a little dull and draggy in the first half, but overall, I liked it. Kevin’s Commentary The bight/bite play on words is clever. It flowed along with a lot of talk, and then it got realer than I expected when Sebastian stepped things up a bit. All in all, it wasn’t what I expected, and I liked it quite a bit. What a way to rekindle your relationship. 2024 Seven Cemeteries * Directed by: John Gulager * Written by: John Gulager, Joel Soisson * Stars: Danny Trejo, Sal Lopez, Samantha Ashley * Run Time: 1 Hour, 24 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone The plot is simple. A recent parolee gets a Mexican witch to resurrect his old posse so that they can help him save a woman’s ranch from a ruthless drug lord. So it’s an action crime drama with magic and lots of dark humor. We both thought it was really good. Spoilery Synopsis In Diablo County, Texas, men come to an isolated ranch, and Matteo, the man who lives there, grabs his gun. The old man in the car wants to buy the farm, and he’s not going to take no for an answer. That goes really bad for Matteo. We cut to Santana Bravo, being released from prison, where he’s been since 1973, as credits roll. We’re told he was falsely accused of murder and spent 41 years in prison. He goes to Diablo County and goes to that same ranch for a job from Matteo. Matteo’s wife, Carmela, wants to hire him for protection from the old Abuelo. Sheriff Jake shows up, and oddly, all their body cameras aren’t working. He marches Bravo out into the field, and shoots him in the back three times. Bravo wakes up some time later in the home of a bruja, an enchantress, and her husband, Miguelito is a zombie. She also wants him to stand up to Abuelo. Back in the day, Abuelo killed Bravo’s wife. He became a legend in the region for standing up to Abuelo back in ‘73. He’s old now, and not up to the fight anymore. She says he “needs a crew” and can make one by standing over a grave and bleeding. Bravo goes off to do the job, and he takes Miguelito with him. Miguel explains what it’s like to be dead, and he doesn’t mind it too much. They head to cemetery number one and Bravo cuts himself and bleeds into the grave. His blood explodes dramatically, and when the fire clears, dead Eugene is back, out of the grave, awake, and not too happy to be there. At the next cemetery, they wake up another corpse, Tommy LaSorda. Tommy and Eugene don’t get along, and they wreck their truck. They quickly manage to steal another one. They all drive to another cemetery and dig up Quasimodo, the dead professional wrestler and his girlfriend Delores, both buried in their luchadore costumes. At the fifth cemetery, they wake up Stickface, a homicidal hockey player. Meanwhile, back at the farm, Camela and her mother get ready for a fight when Abuelo returns in the morning. Sheriff Jake and his men arrive in force, and they want trouble. Jake is the first to die in the ensuing fire fight. Then the dead arrive and mess up the killers. They are not gentle, and there’s some great carnage. Carmela is a little surprised to find Bravo with an army of zombies who all introduce themselves. “One problem at a time,” she tells her elderly mother. As everyone gets set working to reinforce the house, Quasimodo sings to Delores. They learn that there are tunnels under the farm that leads across the border. Hector reports to El Abuelo about their defeat at the ranch earlier in the morning, and the old man is not happy. El Abuelo then grabs Miguel and plays the accordion for him. Miguel doesn’t torture well. He warns Abuelo that the others are “Way less chill.” Then they put him through a wood chipper. At cemetery number six, Bravo and Carmela visit Matteo’s grave. They talk about Guadalupe, Bravo’s long-dead wife. The bad guys grab the bruja and drop her off at the ranch. She’s wearing a big bomb, the same way Abuelo killed Guadalupe many years ago. She goes boom, and the zombies are not pleased. Bravo’s got nothing to offer them now; he had promised that the bruja would restore them to real life, but that’s not gonna happen now. That’s OK, as they all want revenge now. The baddies return with missiles, and they blow up Stickface. The gang heads down to the cellar and the tunnels to head for Mexico. All the zombies want to blow up the tunnels and bury themselves to save Bravo, Carmela, and the old lady. Bravo is killed anyway, but Carmela’s mother revives him. When they get to the other side of the tunnel, Abuelo is waiting for them. The old man gets the drop on them, but then, out of nowhere, Miguel’s severed hand crawls up the old man’s pants and does bad things to him. Bravo and Carmela finish him off. At cemetery number seven, Bravo reburies all his zombie friends. Bravo and Mihuel’s hand walk off to have further adventures. Brian’s Commentary This is great, it pokes fun at westerns, Mexican wrestlers, revenge films, zombie tropes, and everything else it can throw in. Mostly, though, it follows the basic plot of “Seven Samurai.” It’s more comedy than horror, but it’s about zombies, so there’s that. Danny Trejo’s getting a little old to be doing physical stunts and violence, but as the leader of the group, he does well here. The array of dead characters is fun, especially Lew Temple as Tommy Lasorda. Kevin’s Commentary I thought the humor in this was excellent. The script is very good, taking an old idea and adding the element of the undead to liven it up. I’d say it was my favorite Danny Trejo movie that I’ve seen. 2007 Pumpkinhead 4: Blood Feud * Directed by: Michal Hurst * Written by: Michael Hurst * Stars: Lance Henriksen, Rob Freeman, Amy Manson * Run Time: 1 Hour, 35 Minut

    32 min

  4. 8 FEB.

    Anaconda, Anacondas, Anaconda 3: Offspring, 4: Trail of Blood, and Chinese Anaconda

    We watched the original “Anaconda” (1997) film a couple of years ago, but this week, we’re completing the series. We’ll start off this time with the second film, “Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid” (2004), then the two real sequels, “Anaconda 3: Offspring” (2008) and “Anaconda: Trail of Blood” (2009). Then we’ll watch last year’s Chinese remake, “Anaconda” (2024). Lastly, we’ll watch the recently-released mostly-comedy, “Anaconda” (2025). All this, as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #53, is available! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com Mainstream Films: 2004 Anacondas: The Hunt for the Blood Orchid * Director: Dwight H. Little * Writers: Hans Bauer, Jim Cash * Stars: Morris Chestnut, KaDee Strickland, Eugene Byrd * Runtime: 97 minutes * YouTube Trailer Link: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone When a pharmaceutical company gets information on an orchid that only blooms for a limited time, only grows in Borneo, and could have incredible medical uses, a group goes off on an expedition to collect some. As the title hints, there are big snakes in the mix. And human mistakes and greed. It’s not a great film, but it’s well put together and managed to entertain us both. Spoilery Synopsis As credits roll, we open on some jungle people hunting a tiger, or maybe it’s hunting them. The tiger might be the least of these guys’ problems, as a giant anaconda eats them instead. In the big city, Gordon is about to lose his pharmaceutical company for lack of performance. Jack explains about the blood orchid, a plant in Borneo that’s extremely rare and might be able to extend human life indefinitely. The orchid is only in bloom for another two weeks, so they need to hurry to Borneo and find some more. In Borneo, there’s trouble with the charter boat; no one will go upriver until the rainy season ends… in three weeks. There’s one guy who will do it; Gordon, Gail, and Jack go into a seedy bar and find Bill Johnson, who wants fifty thousand for the journey. Ben, Cole, Tran, and some other characters introduce themselves at the docks the next day. There’s some banter and hijinks as we get to know the characters a little. Bill’s little monkey pet takes a side quest and runs into trouble. They can hear the screams on the boat. In the morning, they all wonder where the monkey went. Gail falls overboard and runs into a crocodile. Bill shows us that he’s a badass and fights it. We see, but the characters don’t, as the anaconda eats the whole dead crocodile. Also, the not-so-dead monkey comes back for an unexpected jump scare. Because of the rainy season, the river is flooded, and debris jams the propellers; now they’re headed towards a waterfall in the broken boat. There’s literally no possible way the boat could survive going over the waterfall, and we were pleasantly surprised that it didn’t. With everyone in the water, we see the snake again, but it doesn’t get anyone. Bill has a plan to hike to a place where they can be rescued. It only involves a short walk through the jungle. Bill calls his friend John to come and pick them up at a rendezvous point. The group then has to walk through a flooded region, and we see the snake is right alongside them. When the snake reveals itself and eats Ben, everyone sees it. Bill says that was the largest he’s ever seen, a real freak of nature. Fortunately, they’re very territorial, so there won’t be another one for miles. Gail calls off the expedition, but Jack and Gordon refuse to stop. They all argue about how much is riding on this expedition. Cole is the “We’re all gonna die” guy, and he gets annoying fast. He shuts up when he finds leeches all over his body. Meanwhile, at the boat, John is attacked by the anaconda and crashes the boat. The group finds the wreckage and manages to salvage a few things. Tran mentions that maybe they can find help with a nearby tribe of headhunters. When they find John’s body, Bill explains how anacondas spit up their food, also how they all congregate during mating season, so there may be more than just one. They come to the tribe’s camp and it smells bad. There’s a dead anaconda there with half a man hanging out of it. The villagers are all gone now. Jack figures out that these anacondas are so big because they’ve been eating the orchids and have become immortal: they may never stop growing. Jack unleashes a poison spider on Gordon, who tries to use the sat phone to call for help. Jack doesn’t want to quit just yet. The snake shows up and eats Gordon, who is too paralyzed to fight back. Jack then steals the raft while everyone’s distracted. The others try to follow Jack on foot, and naturally, they get separated. Tran gets eaten, but Sam beheads the snake. Whoops- another sneak jumps out and grabs Cole, who miraculously survives. Jack, Meanwhile, heads downriver and finds his orchids. The others soon catch up, and they all know what Jack did. The flowers are surrounded by baby anacondas, and Sam is forced to retrieve them. There’s a struggle over the bag of flowers and Jack is bitten by one of those spiders and falls into the nest. The snakes are all so distracted by eating him that Sam escapes. Bill shoots a flare gun, and the whole rain-soaked hillside explodes, burying the nest, the flowers, and everything else. Bill, Sam, Cole, and Gail all laugh at their luck as they row the raft further downstream. Brian’s Commentary It’s got a very “TV Movie” vibe to it, but it was, in fact, a theatrical release. It’s also the last film in the franchise to focus mostly on practical effects, but there’s still plenty of CGI going on. The story is very predictable, and you know how it’s all going to play out. Still, it’s nicely paced, the characters are distinctive, and it more or less all makes sense. It’s not great, but it’s entertaining if you like big CGI snakes. Kevin’s Commentary I was bracing myself for awfulness and was pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t too bad. Quite entertaining in fact. The use of CGI is heavy and obvious, but the story moves well and the cast does a decent job. Watching it was a pleasurable experience. 2008 Anaconda 3: Offspring * Director: Don E. FauntLeRoy * Writers: Nicholas Davidoff, David C. Olson * Stars: David Hasselhoff, Crystal Allen, Ryan McCluskey, Patrick Regis, John Rhys-Davies, Anthony Green. * Runtime: 1 Hour, 31 Minutes * YouTube Trailer Link: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone The blood orchid from the previous movie only works on snakes, and works very well, in the lab - which they bust out of. The company wants to keep it quiet, so a team of expendables are sent to retrieve them. It’s watchable, but pretty low effort and mediocre. The sequels are not heading the right direction in quality. Spoilery Synopsis We open on four men walking through the woods (it doesn’t look like the jungle), and there’s a big snake crawling through the trees above them. Suddenly, they’re attacked by the snake, and there’s a lot of shooting. Credits roll. Mr. Murdoch listens to a report on the testing of a new drug that had horrible results. He tells Pinkus that PETA has been complaining about the company and the leak that told them about it. They have a queen anaconda in their lab. They’ve been working on blood orchid extract, and it seems to be working, but only in snakes right now; it’s lethal in humans. They’re experiments with the serum have made aggressive giant snakes. Amanda Hayes is the herpetologist of the facility, and she wants bigger, stronger cages. She picks up right away that Murdoch is dying and wants the serum to live longer. The big snake breaks through the glass and kills a technician. The base goes on lockdown as the snake disappears. It bites the head off a security guard on the way to the queen. Amanda goes to the main lab, but the queen is now gone. The snakes were smart enough to break out. Murdoch orders Pinkus and Grozny to take control of the situation. We cut to Hammett, the guy we saw in the opening scene, selling rhino horns on the black market. We see that he’s a badass even without the wild animals. Pinkus calls him to hunt the snake. The ragtag collection of diverse caricatures heads off to hunt the snake. Elsewhere, a farmer has some misadventures and finds himself inside a snake. The team shows up, searches, and Grozny is impaled. Everyone blasts the snake with machine guns, but nothing stops the snake. Amanda and Pinkus come face to face with the huge snake. Hammett finally shows up and immediately explains a plan and starts giving orders. There’s an extended chase scene through the woods. Victor and Sofia don’t last long against the snake. Amanda escapes but then has a flashback to all the people she’s watched die. Everyone comes to the conclusion that Amanda knows more than she’s telling. She admits that they messed with the snake’s DNA and it got a little… mutated. Also, the queen is pregnant and will be giving birth very soon. The offspring will be useful in developing the health serum. But they all know that would be bad news for the country if they are allowed to live free. The snakes arrive, and Pinkus dies. Hammett calls the local army guy and asks for backup, but he’s clearly not into that and might have faked the call. The snakes, meanwhile, slither into the local lake that’s really near the town. Amanda and Nick follow the snake into an old factory, and there’s a lot of hide-and-seek. It finds Nick first, but he feeds it a grenade. That’s one dead snake, but the queen is still out there. We cut back to Murdoch, who’s on the phone with someone we don’t know, making some kind of plan. Hammett shoots Andre in the back and holds Amanda at gunpoint; he wants those baby snakes - he’s been promised 10 million bucks for one. He and Amanda fight, but he doesn’t s

    31 min

  5. 1 FEB.

    Grizzly Night, Merge, Pumpkinhead Ashes to Ashes, It Came From Beneath the Sea, and Godzilla Giant Monsters All-Out Attack!

    Two new films and a handful of weird oldies. We’ll open with “Grizzly Night,” a new dramatization of a true event. Also, we’ll take a look at the sci-fi “Merge” which hopefully isn’t based on true events. We’ll continue looking at the Pumpkinhead series with “Ashes to Ashes” and then the really old “It Came From Beneath the Sea” from way back in 1955. Lastly, Godzilla Returns with “Godzilla, Mothra, and King Ghidorah: Giant Monsters All-Out Attack” from 2001. All this as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #52, is available! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com Mainstream Films: 2026 Grizzly Night * Directed by: Burke Doeren * Written by: Bo Bean, Katrina Mathewson, Tanner Bean * Stars: Charles Esten, Oded Fehr, Brec Bassinger * Run Time: 1 Hour, 27 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone In August 1967 in Glacier National Park, Montana, there were two fatal attacks by two different grizzly bears. Here they have milked this story into an hour and a half movie. It’s well made and the acting is decent, they captured 1967 pretty well. Brian liked it a lot, and Kevin says it feels like there’s a lot of filler that bored him some. Spoilery Synopsis A couple in a tent are harassed by a nosy grizzly bear as they hide in terror. This goes badly as credits roll. It’s 1967, and this is based on a true story. Eighteen hours before the attack, a woman files yet another report about the bear that’s been terrorizing the campers. The rangers are all busy with a firewatch and fire fighting after the lightning storm last night. Joan, the new girl, gets assigned to lead an overnight hiking group since all the “real” rangers are busy. Julie calls her mother from the camp store; she’s going camping with Michelle, Paul, Denise, Raymond, Ronald, and Roy this weekend, since there’s nothing else to do. Everyone sets off on their respective hikes. At the chalet, Joan stops with her group. Julie and Roy stop in, but there are no rooms available. Her and a few others have to sleep outside since the place is all booked up. Paul and Michelle’s group go to the lake and do some fishing. Michelle’s group runs into a bear, and it takes their dinner. It’s too late to head to the ranger station, so they just hope it doesn’t come back. Roy staggers into camp and says a bear got Julie. The screaming wakes up Joan and the people at the chalet. We get a flashback, and see that they were the couple screaming before the credits. Joan calls the main ranger, Gary, and reports the bear attack. He promises that help is on the way, but he’s a long way off. Gary then takes a helicopter to get there faster, but it’s awfully dark outside. Joan gets the people on the ground to light fires to give the copter a place to land, which finally works. The doctor patches up Roy and they load him onto the helicopter to the hospital. Meanwhile, nine miles away, Denise wakes up, and the bear they saw earlier is back. The bear drags off Michelle, sleeping bag and all. Gary, Joan, and the others search for Julie, and soon find signs of the attack in her campsite. They soon find her, still alive but wounded. Gary and Joan talk about leadership. Julie’s too far gone, so the priest moves in to do his thing as she dies. Gary explains that in 57 years, there hasn’t been a single grizzly attack until now. In the morning, Michelle’s group is still out there, but they haven’t found her yet. They decide to walk to the ranger station and report what happened. Two attacks should be impossible, and the ranger there is skeptical at first. They search the woods and find… parts. Many rangers show up, all armed; it’s time to kill the bears. Joan and Leonard talk about the likelihood of two bear attacks and whose fault this was. Brian’s Commentary This isn’t so much a horror movie as it is a drama about a terrifying situation. It starts out with all the horror movie tropes and characters, but then just focuses on what happens without playing up the bear or the drama excessively. It’s based on a true incident, and it doesn’t stray too far from the actual case. It was quite good! Kevin’s Commentary This is indeed based on a true event. On the night of August 13, 1967, two young women were attacked and killed by two different bears miles apart in Glacier National Park, Montana - a heck of a coincidence. There’s an online article about the real thing that’s interesting - https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Night_of_the_Grizzlies. Here they expand the story out into a movie almost an hour and a half long. The sauce is spread mighty thin. It’s well made, but there isn’t a lot of substance. After the attacks, I found myself getting fairly bored. 2025 Merge * Directed by: Bela Baptiste, Dalano Barnes, Richard Fenwick * Written by: Bela Baptiste, Dalano Barnes, Richard Fenwick * Stars: Achmed Abdel-Salam, Tatjana Alexander, Bela Baptiste * Run Time: 1 Hour, 17 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone It’s an anthology of science fiction short stories, each heavily depending on technology far ahead of where we currently are. It shows various ways humans could interact with such technology, and how it can interact with us when it has a mind of its own. The stories are pretty gentle, sweet, and romantic, with a zero body count. But there is uncertainty, a lack of control, and the potential for disaster making an undercurrent of horror if you look for it. The stories are all well written, well acted, and well directed. The CGI is a little heavy handed and obvious, but it’s entertaining. It reminded us of “Black Mirror.” Spoilery Synopsis A man has breakfast in a futuristic city and suddenly starts screaming. Angst A narrator explains that everything is perfect and everyone is happy now. Fear no longer exists, and that’s how he makes his business. He gives people phobias for excitement. We see a man become terrified of his own pet spider and a woman becomes claustrophobic. We return to that screaming man and see what he thinks he sees. “Embracing your fear allows you to be reborn,” he explains. The man offers the drug for free. Credits roll. Soulmate A couple talks in bed. He’s so glad he found her, he bought her a book. Turns out, this is a virtual world, and only the girl is real. She’s not allowed to be in there, and there’s an investigation into the illegal avatar. She goes back inside to break up with the man, who doesn’t understand. When she arrives back at work, the boss is sitting at her workstation; she’s going to be caught– but she isn’t. As the boss goes for a break, she deletes the AI logs. The investigation eventually ends, and Anna goes back to work. She restores the deleted information and goes back inside for Neil, who no longer recognizes her. She gets a message: “Scenes no longer compatible with current software version.’ She deletes this newest meeting and then goes back in time to their first meeting. Anna meets Neil for the first time– again. When Unfettered Two men sit by their father, who dies. The father’s robot assistant, Ash, walks them through the process. The girls decide what to do with the house and also what happens with Ash, whom they don’t really want anymore. Ash goes outside for a walk, and she’s a lot more human than people expect. She meets a handicapped boy in the park and plays with him. Everyone thinks she’s great until the mom finds out she’s an AI, and then she gets rude. Then she meets and helps an old couple who are very nice. Ash decides to never go home. The First Time I Never Met You John listens to recorded messages from his dead wife. He’s so broken up that he’s lost his job. Overdue notices litter his desk. He’s got some kind of plant that sends him back in time to the first time he met her. Their “first” date goes well; he’s a physicist, and she’s an evolutionary biologist. He talks about “rewinding” time. He’s so in awe at seeing her again that he acts strangely, knowing too much about her that she’s never told him. She’s so creeped out that she breaks it off and goes home. Suddenly, he doesn’t remember why he’s there. He forgets his children and whole life, since now, none of that happened. He leaves the bar and goes back to his new, old life. Subscribed We open on a commercial for Vitalus, a new AI product. “Your life, upgraded!” We soon see that all the AI just lets people stay inside all the time. Carol gets a phone call, and it appears that maybe Vitalus is censoring the news and information she gets to keep her inside and addicted to the AI. It watches all her body functions everywhere, even on the toilet, and in bed. Luke keeps trying to get through to her, both on the phone and in-person, but the AI keeps dropping the call and running him off. The AI does not want her talking to him any more. She wises up to all this, but “Vicky” still won’t let her out the front door. She shorts out the power and runs outside, where Vitalus Tases her and sends her back inside. She wakes up, and Vicky says it was all just a nightmare. The Man Behind the Machine Martin lives in a warehouse; a man from the Turing company comes to repossess his android. He’s an older model and is returned to Turing, where he meets a newer model. His signal is different; he’s malfunctioning and escapes back to Martin. He wants to choose what he wants, which is unique. Brian’s Commentary It’s way more sci-fi than horror, but these alternate, high-tech futures have a lot of overlap with horror. The first segment of this anthology has dodgy CGI and voice dubbing, but the others mostly look good and are well-acted. I have to admit, I didn’t really understand the final segment. The middle segments are the best of the bunch, If you like “Black Mirror,” then you’ll probably enjoy this. Kevin’s Commentary

    30 min

  6. 25 JAN.

    Dust Bunny, Killer Whale, Queens of the Dead, Godzilla vs Megaguirus, and Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings

    Trash and treasure this time. We’ll open with “Killer Whale,” our first film released in 2026. We’ll then watch a fun zombie film, “Queens of the Dead” from last year, as well as “Dust Bunny” just recently released. For our oldies, we’ll contend with “Godzilla vs Megaguirus” from 2000 and “Pumpkinhead II: Blood Wings” from back in 1993. All this, as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #52, is available! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com Mainstream Films: 2026 Killer Whale * Directed by: Jo-Anne Brechin * Written by: Jo-Anne Brechin, Katharine McPhee * Stars: Virginia Gardner, Mel Jarnson, Mitchell Hope * Run Time: 1 Hour, 29 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone Two young women end up trapped on a tropical atoll by a killer whale with a thing against humans. The acting is a moderately bright spot in a slog of bad pacing, a lame simple script, and way too much CGI and greenscreen. We didn’t care much for this one. Spoilery Synopsis We open with some discussion of Orcas, killer whales, and the whale at the Sea World-ish amusement park. Chelsea and her friend Dana, who work there, talk about how their whale, Ceto, just isn’t the same since they took away her baby. The whale eats Chelsea, and the credits roll. Maddie and Chad talk about Trish, who’s busy with school. He gives her a cello necklace and leans in for a kiss, just as a gunman comes into the place to rob them. There’s a struggle, and the gun goes off, damaging Maddie’s hearing. Everyone survives the attack, but, from out of nowhere, Chad is killed by the robber’s truck. One year later, Trish comes to visit Maddie and offers to take her on a trip. Maddie doesn’t want to go, but Trish is persuasive. They fly to an island resort in Thailand. On the beach, Trish brings up the topic of Ceto, which disturbs Maddie. Josh, a local guy, talks about the local whale, Ceto, who has been in captivity for twenty years and lost her baby two years ago. That night, the three of them sneak into the run-down amusement park to see Ceto. Maddie gets to see Ceto up close in the aquarium. She hates that the whale is trapped here, but then she watches as the whale kills a maintenance worker. Maddie, Trish, and Josh are then chased out of the park by a security guard. In the morning, the trio takes a Jet-Ski out to an isolated island. The locals say this place is cursed, and something happened a few years ago, and now no one comes here. In almost no time flat, they lose Maddie’s phone, the Jet-Ski, and Josh to an Orca attack. The two girls are now stuck on a pizza-shaped floatie and can see the giant orca swimming around beneath them. It’s Ceto, the same whale that was in the park last night, somehow. They can tell by the distinct dorsal fin. Trisha jumps off the pizza and swims to a big rock, Maddie chickens out. There’s some quick drama, and Maddie soon ends up on the rock as well. The two eventually calm down and talk about how Ceto could possibly be here. “Orcas have never ever killed anyone in the wild.” The girls take a nap, and when they wake up, they see a boat, but it’s too far away to see them. We’re reminded that Maddie is deaf, which is probably going to mean something later. One of Josh’s arms floats by, and Maddie snags it with her bag. It’s not for lunch, she wants his wristband flashlight. When night falls, they use it as a signal, but no one comes. The girls talk about Maddie playing the cello again and going back to school. They use Chad’s cremation stone to break open a shelled thing to have something to eat. Afterwards, she decides it’s finally time to throw the stone away. Trish admits that she put the robber up to the robbery that night; it’s her fault Chad was killed. We get a whole dramatic guilt-spiel from Trish. Again, we’re reminded about Maddie’s hearing aids. In the morning, Trish explains her plan to swim to the atoll surrounding their rock, but Maddie has her hearing aids off and doesn’t even know what’s going on. She makes it, but Maddie only makes it to another rock. When Trish is distracted by a plane flying over, the orca jumps up into the shallows and drags Trish back into the water– and bites her leg off. She crawls back up on the beach but soon bleeds to death. Night falls, and Maddie decides to swim to the atoll. She makes it without too much issue and then makes her way around to where Trish’s body is and buries her in the sand. Maddie remembers that Trish said her phone was waterproof, but it went down with the Jet-Ski. Can she retrieve it? She does. Rather than get out of the water, she activates the phone right there, in the water. It’s unclear if she sent an SOS or the phone didn’t work. This is followed by a string of ridiculous underwater hide-and-seek, resulting in Maddie stabbing the Orca in the eye with her broken Cello bow stick. When the sun comes up a helicopter arrives; the phone’s SOS did work after all. Brian’s Commentary Brian’s Rating:** Although the whole thing probably wasn’t filmed in front of a green screen, it seems like most of the outdoor scenes were. There are a lot of outdoor scenes, so… ouch! The whale is either as large or as small as the plot requires; sometimes it’s huge, and other times it squeezes right up to the rock. I’ve seen this compared to “Fall” (2022), and it is a very similar theme: two girls stuck in a bad place. The other film did it better. It’s contrived, the characters make one stupid decision after another, and the whole thing with the whale’s location makes no sense. The acting and dialogue are atrocious as well. It’s pretty terrible. Kevin’s Commentary Kevin’s Rating: * So much green screen and CGI. It is so, so obvious and overused. I agree with the comparisons to “Fall” and that movie did it better. The three leads have some skill, but they can’t overcome the effects, direction, and script. It gets worse as it goes along until it culminates with a weak ending. I didn’t like it. 2025 Queens of the Dead * Directed by: Tina Romero * Written by: Erin Judge, Tina Romero * Stars: Jaquel Spivy, Kay O’Brian, Quincy Dunn-Baker * Run Time: 1 Hour, 41 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone It’s drag queens, with their friends and family, versus a zombie outbreak. Holed up in a club against the backdrop of a larger apocalypse, there’s a lot of humor with a body count that racks up. The pacing is a little draggy in places, and the zombie action is pretty low for most of the movie, but it’s a fun watch. Spoilery Synopsis We open on an over-the-top drag queen walking down the street on the way to church. When she goes into the church, her Grindr alert goes off. She finds the man’s phone, but it’s covered in blood. Then she finds him, but he doesn’t look quite alive anymore. She’s bitten by the zombie priest. Credits roll. We cut to a musical number interspersed with scenes of a dancing nurse, Sam, at the hospital. Sam talks to Jane, a patient with issues, who wants to leave. On the stage, Kelsey and Ginsey argue with dancers in the show. Yasmine phones Dre that she’s too sick to do the show tonight, but she’s obviously faking it. Jax and Nico are dancers, and they’re elevens on the gay scale. Jane watches their livestream and tells Sam about it. Sam knows Yasmine and Dre, but that was another time. Jane wants to meet all of them and tell them they’ve got bad drugs. Nurse Lizzy tells Dre that Barry is coming over to unplug her toilet. There’s a lot going on. Everyone’s ready for the big show, and Dre breaks the news that Yasmine’s not coming tonight, so Ginsey will have to headline the act. Nico’s more than willing to step up. They’ve presold a ton of tickets, but hardly anyone has shown up. Barry gets all the pronouns mixed up. When Sam shows up, just as a guest, everyone knows him. Sam used to be “Samonsay,” a major drag star. Barry finds a dead rat in the toilet and takes it out to the garbage. As he’s out there, we see that pre-credit drag queen stumble in. Sam tells Ginsey why he’s been out of action for a while. It was stage fright, and he just couldn’t do it anymore. He starts to change into his costume but then chickens out again. Barry gets a bit of news on his phone about disturbing events in Manhattan. Out on the dance floor, the zombie queen starts looking for people to eat. Barry grabs an axe, but it’s Kelsey who gets hacked. Things go South from there. Sam goes into nurse mode and works on Kelsey’s chopped up leg. Dre tries to call an ambulance and gets a busy signal for 911. Then a shelter in place alert sounds over all their phones. Everyone argues about what’s going on, but it’s all over the news and social media, so they don’t argue long. Jimmy, the bar owner, has some weapons hidden. The Mayor, Tom Savini, comes on and tells everyone to stay home, “This is not a George Romero movie!” At the hospital Jane and Lizzy see that it’s happening there as well. A man in a bloody bunny suit attacks them. At the club, Jax the dancer is clearly a zombie now, and the others all see what he’s become. They all argue some more about what to do about him. They lock him in a dancer’s cage. Next, they catch Yasmine sneaking in through the window. Jimmy is pulled out the window and bitten. The front door is cut open, and new people come in, led by Pops, Kelsey’s girlfriend and fiancee. She mentions a boat waiting for them. Dre wants to wait for Lizzy to arrive, but most of the rest want to go to the boat. A zombie stumbles in, and she drills him through the head. Sam and Dre put Jimmy in the freezer and talk about how he’s changed. After consulting a paper map, several of the group decide to go for a truck, but first, they all change their outfits. Nico, Sam, and Ginsey all dress up to go out on electric scoote

    31 min

  7. 18 JAN.

    The Demoness, Super Happy Fun Clown, Megan is Missing, Come and See, and Wisconsin Death Trip

    Back to our usual five films this week, and we have an interesting mix of horror and terrifying reality. We’ll start with “The Demoness,” which just came out, along with “Super Happy Fun Clown,” also new. We finally got around to “Megan is Missing” from 2011. For a couple of older films, we went with “Wisconsin Death Trip” (1999) and “Come and See” (1985). All this, as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #52, is available! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com Mainstream Films: 2025 The Demoness * Directed by: Andrew de Burgh * Written by: Andrew de Burgh * Stars: Akihiro Kitamura, Riley Nottingham, Bella Glanville * Run Time: 1 Hour, 33 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone A demoness visits Earth to cause trouble for one couple in particular. A couple with relationship issues. We had issues understanding several of the characters. After the couple, she moves on to mayhem to a series of victims. We both agree that it suffers from too much dialogue that’s difficult to understand, poor pacing, and bad CGI. It didn’t work for either of us, with Kevin being more forgiving of it. Spoilery Synopsis We open in an apartment as a jerky-moving demoness wanders through the house and stops next to the occupied bed. Credits roll. In the morning, the couple wakes up and complains about the economy and their jobs. They argue about Sarah’s inability to get a job. That night, the demoness comes back into their room, and this time, we see what it does. It wakes up Jack and has sex with him, but Sarah can’t hear them and doesn’t wake up. In the morning, Sarah finds some evidence of sex in the bed and assumes Jack’s been cheating on her. The demoness comes to her and they argue about the sex last night. “Kill him if you want to live.” That evening, she poisons Jack and dismembers him on the autopsy table they have in the garage for some reason. She mumbles in British throughout the process. The demoness returns and bites Sarah on the neck, vampire-style. The demoness then conjures up assistance, and Satan himself shows up, also speaking too modulated to understand more than half of it. She admits that she’s had a great time with Jack and Sarah, but now she wants more. She wants to be able to take human form to make her job easier. He gives her a month to see if she can torture ten people. Now in human form, the demoness heads to Hollywood for victims. We cut to a disco that looks like it was filmed on a green screen without the processing. Two guys hit on an attractive-looking human who’s not at all a demon; she says she’s Charlotte. She’s rude, and they love it. One guy leaves, leaving Steve, a Tech Bro, with Charlotte. The two seem to compare to see who’s the most shallow. She invites him over to her place after dancing. She’s surprisingly philosophical, which puts him off a little. She makes him a drink, and shockingly, it’s drugged. She dresses him up like a clown, puts him back on the autopsy table, and makes a whole unintelligible speech in her demoness form; when she pulls out a machete, we understand that part. In the morning, Charlotte talks to the neighbors, Yagami and Tamara, about moving to Jack and Sarah’s house. They invite her over for dinner. Their daughter has cancer. Charlotte arrives for dinner in a sexy, low-cut dress that Tamara obviously doesn’t approve of. It’s all very awkward. Yagami, on the other hand, says she “looks gorgeous.” It’s an awkward scene that drags on for entirely too long. It soon becomes obvious that they have drugged her. “This will be fun,” Tamara laughs. Daughter Saori says they shouldn’t be doing this just to keep her alive. Charlotte wakes up tied to the wall. The family plans to steal Charlotte’s organs to sell to pay for Sairi’s treatments. Charlotte starts to laugh in a “Do you know who I am” kind of way. She then beats them both to death with a hammer. Steve’s partner, Brad, goes to see a detective about Steve’s mysterious disappearance. They’re hostile with each other for no apparent reason, but Brad seems unhinged. The demoness calls Satan again, and she wants to move on to bigger things; he says no. Brad grabs a gun and breaks into Charlotte’s house. She quickly takes charge of the situation and puts him in a clown costume. Soon after, she eats his eyeball and cuts out his tongue. Then she bites off his toes. The demoness summons Satan yet again, and they discuss the need to deal with Detective Gerrard, the last one alive who knows who Charlotte is. She pays him a visit at his office, and of course that goes very badly for him. And then it was suddenly over, fortunately for all of us. Brian’s Commentary Was the sound designer for this a deaf person? Both Sarah and the Demoness are nearly completely unintelligible. Once the demoness became human, the voices got a lot clearer. When she was back in the makeup, she was unintelligible again. The demoness creature looks really good, but her voice is awful. That’s the fakest disco I’ve ever seen, almost as fake as the CGI gore effects, which are really poorly done. I like the idea and the basic plot, but it’s a really poorly made film. It starts out hard to understand, and once we get moving, it’s only downhill from there. This is pretty awful. Kevin’s Commentary We really could have used subtitles. That conversation between the demoness and Lucifer might have been interesting, but I felt like I missed a quarter of it. But once we got past that and Sarah out of the picture, people’s voices were nice and clear. Until Charlotte went back to her demon form again, sigh. She was good in the role though, and her makeup was cool. This falls in the trope of a killer that is so powerful that the victims have zero chance as they are toyed with, and we know how each confrontation is going to end - it’s just a matter of how. Between the pacing, poor audio, and overacting, I was pretty weary of it as the end approached. And then an abrupt ending happened. I’m going to say I liked it more than disliked it. 2025 Super Happy Fun Clown * Directed by: Patrick Rea * Written by: Eric Winkler * Stars: Jennifer Seward, Nicole Hall, Matt Leisy * Run Time: 1 Hour 27 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone Jennifer’s had a rough life, but she finds a way to happiness and fame by channeling her clown self. After a slow start, we watch her trip to crazy town progress and leave a trail of bodies in her wake. The pacing is uneven, but it’s a pretty good one. Spoilery Synopsis The police have the clown and her hostage in their sights. That goes badly, and then credits roll. Back in 2004, we see a clown in the park. Young Jennifer is somewhat obsessed with clowns and homeless people. She’s smart, but her mother is unenthusiastic. Twenty years later, She’s Jenno-The-Clown, doing mime-y things in the park, and the kids love her. Her husband is unenthusiastic. She’s got serial killer posters on her wall, and she likes that as well. Detectives Barnes and Marshall talk about what crimes they expect this upcoming Halloween. Jennifer and her mother talk about her pedo, ex-lawyer husband and badly paying job. Her mother is still unenthusiastic and downright mean. She and her coworker Ryan fantasize about being serial killers. She loves being a clown, but not much else about her life. After a while, Jennifer stops being enthusiastic about being a clown, so she kills her husband. She just lets him decompose in the spaghetti over the weeks leading up to Halloween. After a while, she starts to eat him. Then she buys a tiny little gun. It’s Halloween, and Jen runs over a guy with her car. She goes over to her mother’s house in full costume and shoots right through her mother’s head. The police get a call to do a wellness check on Jen’s rotting husband. Barnes mentions that he’s afraid of clowns; Marshall hates horses. Neither of them appreciate the half-eaten rotten corpse in the kitchen; they also soon track down her dead mother too. Jen, meanwhile, is at Ryan’s Halloween party and has sex with him. Halfway through, she stabs him with an icepick. Jen then goes to a haunted house attraction and jumps the line. She starts killing the “monsters” inside. The zombie and the Phantom of the Opera are the first to die, but several more follow. Eventually, she comes to a woman dressed as a killer clown, and she likes that a lot but only for a minute. The detectives arrive at the theater, and one of them soon becomes a convenient hostage. We’re back at the opening scene, and Jennifer is shot. Some time later, she wakes up in the hospital without makeup. The networks are already asking for interviews. Detective Marshall is not amused that the evil clown has survived. Brian’s Commentary The childhood segment was only ten minutes long, but seemed like half an hour. I love the husband’s meal choices. After the slow start, the film picks up the pace and goes pretty well until the haunted cinema, where things seem to slow down once again. For a low-budget indie film, it’s not bad. With the exception of the pacing issues, I was entertained. Kevin’s Commentary We have Harley Quinn at home. This spends way too long at the beginning of the movie showing not a whole lot happening in Jennie’s childhood, or it seemed way too long anyway. Once she reaches adulthood things build momentum. The pacing is still uneven throughout, but I thought it was decent overall. I enjoyed it more than disliked it. 2011 Megan is Missing * Directed by: Michael Goi * Written by: Michael Goi * Stars: Amber Perkins, Rachel Quinn, Dean Waite * Run Time: 1 Hour, 25 Minutes * Trailer: Spoiler-Free Judgment Zone It’s a movie entirely on webcam, video, phone camera, and so forth, presented in found footage format. Two “teenage” girls are the main characters, who fall fo

    29 min

  8. 11 JAN.

    Our Best of 2025 Review and Five Short Films

    We’re breaking our usual format this week to cover our top picks of the films released in 2025. We’ll each discuss our top ten picks from the 2025 films as well as our favorite things we watched of the older films we watched last year as well. We’ll discuss a handful of short films too! This as well as the latest issue of “Horror Monthly,” issue #52, is available! Check out all the back issues, as well as our other books, with one easy link: https://horrormonthly.com Short Films: 2022 Short Film CIMIM * Directed by: Cody Mobley * Written by: Cody Mobley * Stars: Darian Michael Garey, Mike Duff, Daniel Kohl * Run Time: 5 Minutes * Watch it: What Happens A group of campers banter about cats vs. dogs. One girl mentions she has edibles in the truck. She goes to grab them, and when she returns, she finds herself still sitting at the campfire. Her doppelgänger opens her eyes and freaks everyone out. One by one, it quickly picks off the campers… Commentary This is all filmed at night, but it’s still brightly lit, and you can see everything that’s going on. We don’t get much explanation for any of it, but then, neither do the campers. It’s very short, but also really well done. And I have no idea what “CIMIM” means. 2025 Short Film The Last Thing She Saw * Directed by: Anthony Cousins, Rebecca Daugherty * Written by: Brady Richards * Stars: Bailey Bolton, Agatha Rae Pokrzywinski, Nathan Tymoshuk * Run Time: 9 Minutes * Watch it: What Happens Emmy has ordered a phone charger, and when the doorbell rings, she answers it. Turns out, it’s a home invasion, and now her phone is dead. She’s just the house sitter, so she doesn’t know the combination to the safe. Emmy has seen the face of one of the intruders, so he plucks out her eyeballs. The rest is all shown through the eyeball’s point of view… Commentary Well, that was different. These don’t seem like smart crooks, and this was not a well-planned robbery. Still, the eyeball on a string is something I’ve always wondered about. This is gross, nasty, and actually pretty funny. 2025 Short Film The Convenience Store * Directed by: Julian Davis * Written by: Julian Davis * Stars: Dominic Collantes, Amia Marisa, Max Ptasznik * Run Time: 10 Minutes * Watch it: What Happens Kira’s mother doesn’t like her working alone at the convenience store all night, but she needs the money. Kira hears something strange outside, but there’s nothing there when she looks. The door opens, and her friend Tommy comes in. He doesn’t like her working alone either. She talks a bit and then gets to work restocking and stuff. The front door opens, and the security camera is no help at all. She hears something outside again, and this time, it goes differently. Commentary It’s well acted, and the set is perfect. It’s the sort of store that’s not at all creepy until it is. It’s another of those shorts where we don’t really know why anything is happening, but we know exactly what’s happening. Nicely done! 2025 Short Film In a Nutshell * Directed by: Ryan Valdez * Written by: Ryan Valdez * Stars: Sarah Palmer, Ivan Djurovic, Chelsea Breeze * Run Time: 8 Minutes * Watch it: What Happens We zoom through what looks like a dollhouse, and then zoom out to see a woman assembling and painting it. She’s making a duplicate model of an actual crime scene. Her husband, Owen, thinks it’s not good for her to be looking at crime scenes and autopsy reports all day. She says it’s a one-time job, and it’ll be done soon. We then see just how accurate Emma’s work really is, as it becomes reality… Commentary This is sharp and looks good. At no point are we unclear on what’s happening, but it’s still suspenseful to watch it play out. 2021 Short Film Sleep Talker * Directed by: Carl Firth * Written by: Sarah Emery, Carl Firth * Stars: Jessica Saras, John van Putten, Rhys James * Run Time: 7 Minutes * Watch it: What Happens Kelly comes home late after work and finds her husband, Curtis, already asleep. Or is he? There are sounds coming from the bedroom, so she checks it out. He’s in there, asleep, but he’s talking. No wait, is that really Curtis doing the talking? Commentary No one’s ever going to believe that actually happened, right? It’s pretty dark, but we see all that we need to see. The “intruder” is really well done, and what he does is interesting as well. Creepy! Best of 2025 Link to Last Year’s Ratings (2024) This time around, we’ll be discussing our favorite films released in 2025. We made a list of everything we watched that was released in 2025, and we each made a top-ten list. There’s some overlap, so we’ll look at our individual picks first, then look at the ones we both chose. Note that these lists are the top ten for each of us, but we didn’t sort them into any special order: the top of the list isn’t necessarily the best of the ten. At the end, we’ll also discuss some of the best things we watched this year that WEREN’T new releases. Overall, we’ll discuss 27 of our favorite films. Brian’s Favorites of 2025 Films * The Ugly Stepsister * * Dracula: A Love Tale * * Companion * Frankenstein * Keeper * Weapons * Ash * Woken * 825 Forest Road * * The Elixir Kevin’s Favorites of 2025 Films * Dracula: A Love Tale * * 825 Forest Road * * Borderline * In Vitro * Monster Island * Self Driver * Sinners * The Monkey * The Ugly Stepsister * * Strange Harvest Unanimous Favorites * The Ugly Stepsister * Dracula: A Love Tale * 825 Forest Road Brian’s Favorite Not-New films * Boys from County Hell * * A Girl Walks Home Alone at Night * * It’s What’s Inside * The Legend of Boggy Creek * Tucker and Dale vs Evil * Inhuman Kiss Kevin’s Favorite Not-New films * A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night * * Boys From County Hell * * Cube (The original 1997) * Flesh For Frankenstein * Horns * Santa Sangre Both Agree * Boys from County Hell * A Girl Walks Home Alone At Night Contact Info: Email: mailto:email@horrorguys.com Websites: * https://www.horrorguys.com * https://www.horrormonthly.com This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.horrorweekly.com/subscribe

    38 min
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Join Kevin and Brian for a weekly podcast episode. Every Friday, the guys release both a video and audio podcast episode that covers everything new in horror, along with a handful of great (and awful) movie reviews! www.horrorweekly.com

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  • Skapad av
    Brian Schell and Kevin L. Knights
  • Aktiva år
    2019 - 2026
  • Avsnitt
    381
  • Åldersgräns
    Vuxet innehåll
  • Copyright
    © Brian Schell
  • Programmets webbplats
    Horror Weekly