Things You Learn in Therapy

Beth Trammell PhD, HSPP
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  • Mental Health
  • Updated weekly

A behind-the-scenes look at the best tips and techniques from clinicians around the world. This podcast shares practical techniques for a wide range of mental health topics, from parenting to substance use, mindfulness, anxiety, depression and so much more. If you are looking for great mental health advice from experienced therapists & psychologists, you are in the right place! AND... if you are you are a clinician who is looking to learn new techniques, this podcast is right for you, too!Listen, like, and subscribe!

  1. 2 days ago

    Parenting In The Scroll Era with Nicole McNelis

    Send us Fan Mail Your feed can make you feel like everyone else has parenting figured out and your brain treats those images like facts. That is where the spiral starts: comparison, pressure, overstimulation, and the quiet sense that you are failing at something that is already hard. We sit down with licensed professional counselor Nicole McNelis, a perinatal mental health clinician and leading voice on mom rage, to name what is actually happening when parents scroll and why it hits so deeply. We talk about the strange mix social media creates, a friend’s real-life update next to professional, aspirational influencer content, and how that “all in one stream” effect confuses our sense of normal. Nicole breaks down the types of parenting influencers, from “I’m just like you” relatability to expert-driven authority, and how both can monetize fear with dramatic promises that are not even developmentally realistic. If you have ever felt pulled toward a quick fix, a course, a journal, or a miracle toddler strategy, you will recognize the pattern. Then we get practical. We share tools for becoming a critical consumer, taking intentional pauses to check your “why,” swapping in replacement behaviors that actually regulate your nervous system, and adding friction by changing how you access apps. We also dig into modeling for kids, from device-free meals to screen boundaries that can evolve as your family evolves, all grounded in self-compassion and ongoing recalibration. If this conversation helps, subscribe, share it with a parent friend, and leave a quick review so more families can find it. Support the show www.bethtrammell.com

    49 min

  2. 2 days ago

    Why Boundaries With Your Parent Can Feel Impossible with Jessica Van Der Merwe

    Send us Fan Mail The moment you ask for something small a knock before entering, a little privacy, a basic respect and the conversation somehow ends with you apologizing, you are not “too sensitive.” We dig into why interactions with emotionally immature parents and other emotionally immature people can feel so disorienting, especially for adult children of dysfunctional families carrying complex trauma. When your nervous system has learned that needs lead to backlash, even healthy boundaries can feel like danger. We talk through what emotional immaturity looks like in real life, how it differs from temporary emotional regression, and why repair and accountability are the dividing line. Then we name a pattern many listeners recognize instantly: DARVO (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender). When DARVO shows up, reality gets rewritten, guilt gets weaponized, and you leave the conversation wondering if you’re crazy, cruel, or selfish for wanting something reasonable. From there, we move into the healing fantasy, the relentless hope that if you find the perfect words, do enough caretaking, or become “mature enough,” they will finally see you and change. We explore how that childhood survival strategy can follow us into adult relationships and identity, and what it looks like to grieve the fantasy without falling into despair. We also answer a big question: how do you stop being defined by your trauma without denying your story? That’s where inner child work, parts work (including IFS-informed approaches), and somatic therapy can help you integrate what happened and reclaim your true self beyond the role you had to play. If you’ve been asking, “How long will this take?” we hold that honestly while still ending in something solid: real hope and real change are possible. Subscribe, share this with someone who needs language for what they’re living, and leave a review. What part of this conversation hits closest to home for you? Support the show www.bethtrammell.com

    44 min

  3. 19 Jun

    Ep173: What If Your Calm Is the Real Product? with Barbara Sheehan-Zeidler

    Send us Fan Mail Therapy is “just listening” the way surgery is “just holding a scalpel.” Barbara Sheehan Zeidler joins me to name the thing many clinicians feel but rarely say out loud: our presence is the intervention. Barbara is a licensed professional counselor, an EMDR approved trainer and consultant, IFS Level 3 certified, and a proud polyvagal nerd, and she breaks down why grounded attunement, self-awareness, and compassionate empathy create the safety that makes any modality actually work. We also go straight into the money conversation therapists tend to avoid. We unpack why accepting payment can feel awkward, how the “fix it” narrative fuels anxious overfunctioning, and why undercharging often ties back to old family stories about scarcity and what it means to be “rich.” We contrast cost vs value in therapy and ask the harder question: what does it cost to keep living with disconnection, conflict, and daily misery? Then we get practical about building alternative income streams for therapists so your career stays sustainable and burnout-resistant. We talk workshops, intensives, retreats, consultation, reputation-building through community offerings, and how to start with what you’re naturally good at instead of copying someone else’s business model. If you want a healthier practice and a calmer relationship with pricing, hit play, share this with a clinician friend, and leave a review. What’s one belief about money you’re ready to rewrite? Support the show www.bethtrammell.com

    47 min

  4. 12 Jun

    Ep 172: What If Your Body Remembers More Than You Do with Scott Stolarick

    Send us Fan Mail Trauma doesn’t have to be catastrophic to be real and “it wasn’t bad enough” might be the most common thought that keeps people from getting help. We sit down with Scott E. Stolarick, LCPC, CCTP, a trauma-informed therapist and the owner of Mosaic Pathway Counseling, to unpack why trauma isn’t a competition and why two people can live through the same moment and walk away with completely different nervous system responses. If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re overreacting, whether you should just get over it, or whether therapy is “for people with bigger problems,” this conversation is for you.  We talk about how validation works in trauma therapy and why so many clients come in hoping a professional will “rate” their experience. Scott offers a grounded reframe: you’re the author of your story, and your internal reaction deserves attention even when outsiders don’t understand it. We also explore how disclosure is shaped by the responses people get from family, partners, and communities, especially when the trauma is sexual abuse or another topic that gets minimized, doubted, or brushed aside.  Then we get practical about EMDR therapy, a trauma treatment modality that can feel more structured than traditional talk therapy. We cover informed consent, readiness, why EMDR can move quickly, and why the therapist’s role is often to create safety and then get out of the way so your mind and body can process. We close with one of the most underrated tools in healing: repair, accountability, and honest feedback inside the therapy relationship.  If this helped you name something you’ve been carrying, subscribe for more, share this episode with someone who needs it, and leave a review so more people can find trauma-informed mental health conversations. This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area. If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6 Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at Beth@makewordsmatterforgood.com Support the show www.bethtrammell.com

    33 min

  5. 5 Jun

    Ep171: What If Summer Had Just Enough Structure?

    Send us Fan Mail Summer doesn’t need to be a “go with the flow” free-for-all to be fun. I’m Dr. Beth Trammell, and I’m sharing a simple, therapy-informed way to plan a season that actually matches your life: your work schedule, your home projects, your relationships, and the kind of rest you want to feel when fall arrives. We start with practical goal setting that works. If your goals sound like “work out more” or “drink more water,” they’re probably too vague to stick. I talk through how to make goals specific, how to keep them realistic based on where you’re starting, and why aiming too high often leads to quitting two weeks later. We also get honest about setbacks. Summer is full of obstacles, from parties and family reunions to ice cream stops and buffet tables, so we plan strategies before temptation shows up. Then we shift to parenting and summer routines for kids. Summer has a different rhythm than the school year, but kids still benefit from structure, clear expectations, and simple routines. I share a real example from my own home, including a daily checklist with creativity time, reading, thinking time, movement, together time, and hydration. We wrap with an important topic that can save you a lot of stress later: maintaining a consistent sleep-wake cycle so the return to school doesn’t become a painful reset. If you want a calmer, more intentional summer without overplanning it, listen now. Subscribe, share this with a friend who needs a reset, and leave a review so more people can find the show. **Replay from 2024 This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area. If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6 Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at Beth@makewordsmatterforgood.com Support the show www.bethtrammell.com

    11 min

  6. 29 May

    Ep170: Sometimes the Best Conflict Skill is Shutting Up with Paula Yost

    Send us Fan Mail Most conflict doesn’t end a relationship. The lack of repair does. I’m joined by Paula Yost, a rare blend of attorney and licensed clinical mental health therapy supervisor, to talk about what she sees when people walk into a law office on the worst day of their lives and why legal training often misses the trauma, grief, anxiety, and mental illness sitting right in front of it. We dig into the practical overlap between mental health and the legal system: why clients repeatedly ask the same question when they’re dysregulated, how cognitive behavioral therapy and nervous system skills can make someone a calmer, clearer client, and why attorneys should build real referral relationships with therapists. We also address a point that protects clinicians: a subpoena is not automatically a green light to hand over your entire file, and confidentiality still matters even when court pressure shows up. From there, we move into the heart of it: relationship repair. We talk about why “let’s just not talk about it” keeps hurt alive, how scorekeeping grows when accountability never comes, and why family estrangement can be the final stage of years of unaddressed pain. Paula shares concrete repair tools that work in everyday conflict, including better timing, curiosity questions that de-escalate, and what an actual apology sounds like when it includes ownership and a plan to change. We also connect the dots to modeling healthy repair for kids, so they learn what constructive conflict looks like instead of silence or explosions. If you want better boundaries, stronger relationships, and more peace after hard conversations, listen now. Subscribe, share this with someone who avoids the repair talk, and leave a review with the skill you’re practicing this week. This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area. If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6 Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at Beth@makewordsmatterforgood.com Support the show www.bethtrammell.com

    39 min

  7. 22 May

    Ep 169: Grief Is Not Just Death with Jillian Oetting

    Send us Fan Mail Grief can feel like a private storm, but it’s also one of the most universal experiences we share and it doesn’t only arrive after a death. I sit down with licensed professional counselor and advanced grief counseling specialist Jillian Oetting to name the kinds of loss that often get ignored: anticipatory grief with dementia or terminal illness, disenfranchised grief after pregnancy loss or infertility, ambiguous loss in estrangement or addiction, and the identity grief that can follow career shifts or postpartum change. We also challenge the idea that grief has a clean finish line. Jillian shares a powerful “rock in your pocket” metaphor: the rock doesn’t shrink, but you grow around it, and grief bursts can still surprise you years later. From there, we dig into grief counseling frameworks that feel realistic, including the dual process model of moving between loss-oriented coping and restoration-oriented coping, plus the tasks of mourning that focus on accepting reality, processing pain, adjusting to a changed world, and finding an enduring connection through meaning making. Then we make it practical for real relationships. We talk about what to say when you’re afraid of saying the wrong thing, why platitudes like “everything happens for a reason” can land as dismissal, and why “let me know what you need” often adds pressure. Jillian offers concrete, caring alternatives: bring food, handle a small household task, keep showing up months later, and keep saying the person’s name so love and memory can keep breathing. If someone you love is grieving or you are carrying your own rock, subscribe, share this with a friend, and leave a review. What’s one supportive sentence you wish people would say more often? This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area. If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6 Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at Beth@makewordsmatterforgood.com Support the show www.bethtrammell.com

    46 min

  8. 15 May

    Ep 168: Stop Telling Yourself to Calm Down with Laura Sgro

    Send us Fan Mail Your body reacts before your brain can explain it and that can feel confusing, embarrassing, or downright discouraging. We sit down with licensed therapist Laura Sgro to make the “nervous system” conversation concrete, starting with what people usually mean online: the autonomic nervous system that drives automatic functions like breathing, heart rate, digestion, and your threat response. From anxiety and burnout to shutdown and dissociation, we talk about why these patterns show up and how they can change with awareness and repetition. Laura walks us through polyvagal theory as a simple ladder you can actually use. We unpack ventral vagal regulation, sympathetic fight-or-flight activation, and dorsal vagal collapse, plus how neuroception can misread safety when you’re exhausted, stressed, or carrying trauma history. We also challenge the idea that one state is “good” and the others are “bad” because each has a purpose. The goal is not perfection, it’s flexibility and choice. Then we get practical: how to find your baseline, how to map what each state feels like in your body, and why “just calm down” is sometimes the wrong move. We share downregulation tools like the physiological sigh, upregulation ideas like gentle movement and sensory cues, and how co-regulation works in real relationships without sliding into codependency. You’ll leave with a clearer nervous system vocabulary and a kinder way to measure progress.  Subscribe, share this with someone who’s been feeling stuck, and leave a review with your favorite “glimmer” of safety from your day. This podcast is meant to be a resource for the general public, as well as fellow therapists/psychologists. It is NOT meant to replace the meaningful work of individual or family therapy. Please seek professional help in your area if you are struggling. #breakthestigma #makewordsmatter #thingsyoulearnintherapy #thingsyoulearnintherapypodcast If you or someone you know is struggling with mental health concerns, please contact 988 or seek a treatment provider in your area. If you are a therapist or psychologist and want to be a guest on the show, please complete this form to apply: https://forms.gle/ooy8QirpgL2JSLhP6 Feel free to share your thoughts at www.makewordsmatterforgood.com or email me at Beth@makewordsmatterforgood.com Support the show www.bethtrammell.com

    45 min
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About

A behind-the-scenes look at the best tips and techniques from clinicians around the world. This podcast shares practical techniques for a wide range of mental health topics, from parenting to substance use, mindfulness, anxiety, depression and so much more. If you are looking for great mental health advice from experienced therapists & psychologists, you are in the right place! AND... if you are you are a clinician who is looking to learn new techniques, this podcast is right for you, too!Listen, like, and subscribe!

Information

  • Creator
    Beth Trammell PhD, HSPP
  • Years Active
    2022 - 2026
  • Episodes
    252
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © 2026 Things You Learn in Therapy
  • Show Website
    Things You Learn in Therapy
  • Provider

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