Reflective Parenting by Curious Neuron

Cindy Hovington, Ph.D.

Parenting shouldn’t be defined by stress, guilt, and self-doubt. Yet for 94% of parents, that’s what our days feel like. As a neuroscientist and mom of three, I know firsthand how easy it is to end the day overwhelmed, wishing you’d been calmer, more present, or more patient with your child. That’s why I created The Reflective Parenting Podcast—a place where we pause, reflect, and discover a new way forward. Join me every Monday as we explore science-backed skills that replace guilt with confidence and stress with calm so that you, and your child, can thrive. Some weeks, I’ll share my own reflections as a parent who’s still learning, just like you. Other weeks, I’ll bring in experts from psychology, neuroscience, and beyond to dive into the research and uncover practical ways we can make parenting feel lighter, less overwhelming, and more connected. Parents don’t need more advice or another education-heavy podcast. What they truly need is a space to pause, reflect, and grow. Reflective parenting isn’t about being perfect—it’s about noticing what drives our reactions and choosing to show up with intention. This podcast is about building resilience, trust, and connection, and joining a movement to reimagine what parenting can feel like—for us, and for our kids.Subscribe today not to miss next week's episode!  Join the private group on Facebook: www.facebook.com/groups/reflectiveparentingpodcast/ Record your story or question: https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcastJoin the Reflective Parenting Program today! Start our science-backed course, join our weekly calls or get 1:1 support with Cindy below: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Follow us on Instagram @curious_neuron or Facebook @curiousneuron

  1. 3 DAYS AGO

    How do we build resilience in our kids without being harsh or overprotective

    Send us a text Do you ever hear your child say things like, “I’m such a bad kid” or “I’ll never be good at this” and your heart sinks because you don’t know what to say? You’re not alone. And this episode is about to change the way you respond. Today, I’m sitting down with award-winning science journalist and author Melinda Wenner Moyer to talk about her latest book Hello, Cruel World, a toolkit for raising confident, resilient kids in today’s messy, complicated world. Here’s the truth: ➡️ Your kids will struggle with self-doubt, negative self-talk, and tough emotions. ➡️ How you respond in those moments can either shut them down or help them build lifelong confidence. ➡️ And the secret isn’t telling them “Don’t say that”  it’s something much more powerful (and doable). In this episode, you’ll learn: The 3-step “recipe” for self-compassion (and how practicing it yourself teaches your kids to do the same).How to validate your child’s feelings without agreeing with their negative self-talk.The surprising research on resilience: why letting your kids sit with discomfort (instead of rescuing them every time) builds the skills they’ll need for life.Why helicopter parenting backfires — and how giving kids independence actually boosts confidence and self-esteem.The truth about alcohol and teens (and why letting them drink at home doesn’t protect them — it puts them at greater risk).This conversation will give you the practical, science-backed strategies you need to: ✔️ Stop feeling helpless when your child is hard on themselves ✔️ Build their confidence in everyday moments ✔️ Feel more equipped to parent in a world that often feels overwhelming This is one of those episodes you’ll want to save, re-listen to, and share with every parent you know. Join Melinda's Newsletter, Now What: https://www.melindawennermoyer.com/ Follow Melinda on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melindawmoyer/ Parenting Self-compassion: a Systematic Review and Meta-analysis: Support the show Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Learn how to become a Reflective Parent! A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join the next FREE webinar about stress management and parenting: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group 🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

    51 min
  2. 22 SEPT

    The Science of How Discipline and Punishment Impact a Child’s Brain Differently

    Send us a text Parents, this one is big. Today we’re breaking down punishment vs discipline, what science says, how it impacts your child’s brain, and why so many of us feel stuck in the cycle of punishing even when we don’t want to. If you’ve ever thought, “I don’t want to yell, spank, or threaten…but it just slips out when I’m overwhelmed,” you are not alone. Here’s what you’ll learn today: What studies reveal about how spanking and harsh discipline change the way your child’s brain processes fear, mistakes, and emotions. Why your nervous system is the most powerful discipline tool you have. A simple framework from Dr. Lori Desautels’ book Connections Over Compliance that helps you “connect before you correct.” And if you’re ready to go deeper, join us inside The Reflective Parent Club. That’s where we take this science and make it real in our daily lives, with support, tools, and a community of parents walking this same journey. Because when you regulate, connect, and guide, you’re not just shaping behaviour. You’re shaping the brain. Articles: https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/33835477/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/36152947/ https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/34197808/ Read blog post: https://curiousneuron.com/2025/09/20/science-of-punishment-vs-discipline-how-parenting-shapes-your-childs-brain/ Podcast episode with Dr. Bruce Perry: https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000596000285 Support the show Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Learn how to become a Reflective Parent! A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join the next FREE webinar about stress management and parenting: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group 🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

    29 min
  3. 15 SEPT

    How to connect with a child that shuts you down (without losing your cool)

    Send us a text This episode will change how you see your child’s moods and how you respond to them. If you’ve ever tiptoed around your child in the morning, worried the “wrong” cereal bowl or shirt will set off a meltdown, this conversation is for you. Joining me is Dr. Alex Reed, pediatric clinical psychologist and mom of two, who has spent years helping families understand temperament, moodiness, and emotional regulation. Together, we pull back the curtain on what’s really happening when your child seems unpredictable, reactive, or even says, “I hate you.” You’ll learn: Why some kids seem “moody” from the start and what temperament really means.The hidden role of shame in meltdowns (and why your child pushes you away even when you’re trying to help).The front door vs. side door approach and why lecturing, correcting, or over-validating often backfires.The science-backed strategies that actually work: modeling, storytelling, and overhearing.How to set calm, clear boundaries without escalating the conflict.The #1 skill you must practice first is your own regulation.This is not about quick fixes or “tricks” for behavior. It’s about raising kids who can handle their big feelings, and parents who can show up with confidence, calm, and connection—even in the hardest moments. By the end of this episode, you’ll have a new way to think about your child’s temperament, and practical steps you can use today to stop walking on eggshells. Join the conversation about this episode on our private Facebook group: https://www.facebook.com/photo?fbid=10172344324640258&set=gm.1942367649950164&idorvanity=677093716477570 Read a science article about this: Predicting child problem behaviour at school age: The role of maternal sensitivity, child temperament and theory of mind Support the show Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Learn how to become a Reflective Parent! A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join the next FREE webinar about stress management and parenting: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group 🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

    1h 9m
  4. 8 SEPT

    How music can lower stress and anxiety (for you and your child)

    Send us a text This episode will inspire you to see music as a powerful tool for connection, healing, and everyday parenting. It’s an invitation to play, sing, and create moments of joy with your children while learning how music can also soothe anxiety, ease transitions, and strengthen emotional bonds. And it’s a behind-the-scenes look at the real science of music therapy – far beyond entertainment and how it can transform lives across every age and stage. Joining me is Tanya Lavoie, a certified music therapist who works in pediatric hospitals and specializes in using music to support regulation, pain management, and emotional expression. In this heartfelt and practical conversation, Tanya shares how her work combines neuroscience, creativity, and compassion to help children and families thrive. You’ll learn: Why music therapy works, and the brain science behind itHow to use music at home to motivate your child, calm meltdowns, and create playful routinesSimple steps to build meaningful playlists for relaxation or focusThe truth about common music therapy myths (including the “Mozart Effect”)How to find a qualified music therapist in your areaIf you’re ready to bring more connection, calm, and joy into your home and discover the therapeutic power of music this conversation is your starting point. Support the show Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Learn how to become a Reflective Parent! A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join the next FREE webinar about stress management and parenting: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group 🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

    51 min
  5. 11 AUG

    Is my child ready for kindergarten readiness? (emotionally)

    Send us a text Is your child ready for kindergarten from an emotional perspective? In this episode, Cindy discusses the emotional aspects of kindergarten readiness, emphasizing the importance of emotional intelligence and self-awareness in children. She introduces the tripartite model of parental socialization, which highlights how parents' emotional coping, parenting styles, and conflict resolution impact children's emotional development. The conversation also covers practical strategies for parents to support their children's emotional growth and prepare them for school. Takeaways Kindergarten readiness involves emotional preparation, not just academic skills.Self-awareness is crucial for coping with emotions.Parents should model emotional regulation for their children.Understanding triggers helps children manage their emotions better.Emotional intelligence is built through conversations about feelings.Expecting children to be emotionally perfect is unrealistic.Parental emotional coping styles influence children's behavior.Setting boundaries while being sensitive is key in parenting.Conflict resolution in the home teaches children about emotions.Curiosity and relationship-building are essential for school readiness.Don't miss these podcast episodes: https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000720552759 https://podcasts.apple.com/ca/podcast/reflective-parenting-by-curious-neuron/id1440533170?i=1000715100953 Support the show Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Learn how to become a Reflective Parent! A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join the next FREE webinar about stress management and parenting: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group 🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

    35 min
  6. 4 AUG

    A science-based tool that helps you shift your perspective (and build your resilience)

    Send us a text In this episode, we explore the idea of “shifting your lens” — a powerful metaphor grounded in science that helps parents understand how their interpretation of a situation shapes their emotional response. Drawing on the work of psychologist James Gross and his research on cognitive reappraisal, we break down how the lens you’re wearing (like blame, control, or shame) can fuel conflict and dysregulation, especially in moments of parenting stress. You’ll learn how to identify the lens you’re in, how to shift your lens to something more helpful (like curiosity or compassion), and how this shift not only supports your own regulation but also helps you model emotional intelligence for your child. Real-life parenting examples, practical tips, and reflection prompts will help you bring this tool into everyday moments even when things get messy. Read our blog post here: https://curiousneuron.com/2025/08/03/how-to-shift-your-lens-and-stay-calm-in-parenting-conflicts/ Read a science article: For Whom and What Does Cognitive Reappraisal Help? A Prospective Study Watch it on YouTube: https://youtu.be/TOURlBqtmIc Support the show Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Learn how to become a Reflective Parent! A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join the next FREE webinar about stress management and parenting: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group 🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

    27 min
  7. 28 JUL

    Can Parenting Style Differences Hurt Your Child? Here's What the Science Says

    Send us a text Are you following positive parenting but your partner is more authoritarian?  This is a common question I receive from parents and so in today's episode, I share a study that was fascinating to me.  In this solo episode, I talk about how you can address parenting differences with your partner without making them feel bad, I chat about the different parenting style and I answer the question of what the long-term impacts are to having different parenting styles.  Source: Differences in perceived parenting style between mothers and fathers: Implications for child outcomes and marital conflict. Read a blog post about this study on our website: https://curiousneuron.com/2025/07/28/can-parenting-style-differences-hurt-your-child-heres-what-the-science-says/ Watch on YouTube: https://youtu.be/wpl1LkhK4B4?si=AfrHaOtasFd2529q Listen to this podcast to learn more about parenting styles: Nurturing a secure attachment with reflection skills The Science of Modern Parenting Support the show Record your message to ask a question, share an insight or give us some feedback! https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcast Learn how to become a Reflective Parent! A science-based course that helps you learn how to cope with emotions, stress, your child's behaviour and your partner! Plus, a weekly coaching call to help you build awareness and practice new tools. https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Join the next FREE webinar about stress management and parenting: https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/989145490b Grab a Free Resource: FREE Workbook: Staying Calm When Your Child Isn’t: A Parent’s Guide to Triggers and Emotions Email: info@curiousneuron.com 📸 Instagram | 🧠 Reflective Parenting Facebook Group 🎥 Watch this episode on YouTube

    32 min

About

Parenting shouldn’t be defined by stress, guilt, and self-doubt. Yet for 94% of parents, that’s what our days feel like. As a neuroscientist and mom of three, I know firsthand how easy it is to end the day overwhelmed, wishing you’d been calmer, more present, or more patient with your child. That’s why I created The Reflective Parenting Podcast—a place where we pause, reflect, and discover a new way forward. Join me every Monday as we explore science-backed skills that replace guilt with confidence and stress with calm so that you, and your child, can thrive. Some weeks, I’ll share my own reflections as a parent who’s still learning, just like you. Other weeks, I’ll bring in experts from psychology, neuroscience, and beyond to dive into the research and uncover practical ways we can make parenting feel lighter, less overwhelming, and more connected. Parents don’t need more advice or another education-heavy podcast. What they truly need is a space to pause, reflect, and grow. Reflective parenting isn’t about being perfect—it’s about noticing what drives our reactions and choosing to show up with intention. This podcast is about building resilience, trust, and connection, and joining a movement to reimagine what parenting can feel like—for us, and for our kids.Subscribe today not to miss next week's episode!  Join the private group on Facebook: www.facebook.com/groups/reflectiveparentingpodcast/ Record your story or question: https://www.speakpipe.com/ReflectiveParentingPodcastJoin the Reflective Parenting Program today! Start our science-backed course, join our weekly calls or get 1:1 support with Cindy below: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/ Follow us on Instagram @curious_neuron or Facebook @curiousneuron

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