美文与经‪典‬ 窗帘上的花环

True love is we stick together in"thick and thin". Especially when it's thin, when it's troublesome.Then we should really bridge over the "troubled water". That's whatthey say in English. But most of us fail the test, to ourselves, not to ourpartners. He might leave you, he might stay with you, because you're nice ornot nice. But you fail yourself. You leave yourself. You leave the most noblebeing that you really are. So we should check up on this to our family membersor whomever that is beloved and dear to us. Most of the time in criticalsituations, we just turn our backs and that is no good.
Of course we have our anger, ourfrustrations, because our partners are not as loving as usual, or whomever thatis; but he or she is in a different situation. At that time, he or she is inmental suffering. It's just as bad or even worse than physical suffering.Physical suffering you can take a pill or you can have an injection and itstops or at least temporarily stops, and you feel the effect right away; or atleast if people are in physical suffering, everyone sympathizes with them.
But when they are in mental anguish, and wepound them more on that, and we turn our backs and become cold and indifferent,that is even more cruel, even worse. That person will be swimming alone insuffering. And especially they trust us as the next of kin, the next person,the one that they think they can rely on in times of need; and then at thattime, we just turn around and are snobbish, because they didn't treat us niceso we just want to revenge. That's not the time. You can revenge later, when he'sin better shape. Just slap him.
Actually, at that time, the person is nothis usual self anymore. He was probably under very great pressure that he losthis own control. It's not really lost his own control, but for example, whenyou are in a hurry, your talk is different. Right? "Hand me that coat!Quick! Quick! Quick!" Things like that. But normally, you would say"Honey, please, can you give me that coat?" Is that not so? Or whenyou're in pain -- for example stomach pain, heartache or whatever -- you screamloudly; and anyone who comes to talk to you, you don't talk in the usual wayanymore, because you're in pain.
Similarly, when you are in a mental orpsychological pain, you talk also in a very grouchy way, very cross. But thatis understandable. So if we -- any so-called loving partner or family member --do not understand even this very least, very basic concept, then we'refinished. Then we are really in a bad situation. It's not that the partner willdo anything to us. Whether he does anything to us later or not, that is noproblem. The problem is us. The problem is we degrade ourselves, that we makeless of a being of ourselves than we should be, than we are supposed to be, orthat we really are. So do not make less of a being of yourselves.

Occasionally, life can be undeniably,impossibly difficult. We are faced with challenges and events that can seemoverwhelming, life-destroying to the point where it may be hard to decidewhether to keep going. But you always have a choice. Jessica Heslop shares herpowerful, inspiring journey from the worst times in her life to the new lifeshe has created for herself:
生活有时候困难得难以置信，但又不容置疑。我们面临的挑战与困境似乎无法抵御，试图毁灭我们生活，甚至使你犹疑是否继续走下去。但是你总有选择的余地。从人生低谷走向新生活的杰西卡·赫斯乐普，在这里与我们分享她启迪心灵、充满震撼力的生活之旅。
In 2012 I had the worst year of my life.
2012年是我生活中最艰难的一年。
I worked in a finance job that I hated andI lived in a concrete jungle city with little greenery. I occupied my time withmeaningless relationships and spent copious quantities of money onsuperficialities. I was searching for happiness and had no idea where to findit.
我做着讨厌的财务工作，住在难寻绿色的高楼林立的城市。我忙于无意义的交往，在一些肤浅表面的东西上大笔开销。我寻找快乐，却又不知道它在哪里。
Then I fell ill with Chronic FatigueSyndrome (CFS) and became virtually bed bound. I had to quit my job andsubsequently was left with no income. I lived with my boyfriend of then only 3months who financially supported me and our relationship was put under greatpressure. I eventually regained my physical health, but not long after that Igot a call from my family at home to say that my father’s cancer had fiercelyprogressed and that he had been admitted to a hospice.
然后我患上了慢性疲劳综合症，几乎到了卧床不起的地步。我不得不辞掉工作，同时也就断了财源。我和那时仅相处了3个月的男友住在一起，经济上完全依赖于他，我们的关系承受着巨大压力。终于我恢复健康，但不久，我接到家里的电话，父亲的癌症急剧恶化，已经住进了临终关怀中心。
I left the city and I went home to be withhim.
我离开了城市，回家陪父亲。
He died 6 months later.
6个月之后，他去世了。
My father was a complete inspiration to me.He was always so strong that, for a minute after he drew his last breath, Ihonestly thought he would come back to life. I couldn’t believe I would neveragain cuddle into his big warm chest and feel safe no matter what.
父亲的事让我彻底清醒。他一直很强壮，在他咽气之后一分钟里，我真的认为，他会活过来。我不能相信，我再也不能依偎在他温暖的怀抱里，享受他宽大的胸怀带给我的安全感。
The grief that followed was intense for allof us 5 children and our mother, but we had each other.
母亲和我们5个兄弟姐妹极为难过，但至少我们还拥有彼此。
But my oldest sister at that timecomplained of a bad back. It got so bad after 2 months that she too wasadmitted to hospital.
但是，那时我大姐开始抱怨着背痛，2个月后，因疼痛加剧也住进了医院。
They discovered that she had highly advancedcancer in her bones and that there was nothing that they could do.
医生们检查发现，她已是骨癌晚期，对此他们已无能为力。
She died 1 month later.
1个月之后，她也走了。
I could never put into words the loss of mysister in my life.
大姐的逝去让我陷入难以形容的痛苦之中。
She was a walking, talking angel and my favoriteperson in the whole world. If someone could have asked me the worst thing thatcould ever happen, it would have been losing her.
在这个世界上，她是一个能走路、会说话的天使，我最喜欢的人。如果有人问我，世界上发生的最坏的事情是什么，那就是失去她。
She was my soulmate and I never thought Iwould journey this lifetime without her.
她是我的灵魂

We don't meet people by accident.
Every person you meet will have a role inyour life, be it big or small. Some will help you grow, some will hurt you,some will inspire you to do better. At the same time, you are playing some rolein their lives as well. Know that paths cross for a reason and treat peoplewith significance.
The best teachers are those who don't tellyou how to get there but show the way.
There is no better joy than helping peoplesee a vision for themselves, seeing them go to levels higher than they everwould have imagined on their own. But that doesn't mean you have to fix them orenable them; instead, guide them to the source of their own power. Offer themsupport and motivation as they find their own way and show you what they'recapable of. All you have to do is believe in them.
Never look down on someone unless you arehelping them up.
We like to think of life as a meritocracy,so it's easy to look down on someone who isn't as successful or accomplished orwell educated as you are. But you have no idea how far that person has alreadyclimbed or where they will end up. Time could easily reverse your positions, sobe sure you treat everyone with dignity.
Appreciate those who have supported you,forgive those who have hurt you, help those who need you.
Business is complicated, life is complex,and leadership is difficult. Treat all people--including yourself--with loveand compassion, and you can't go wrong.
Treat people the way you want to be treatedand life will instantly get better.

Last month I went back to my parent's homein Britain on a vacation.
On the flight back, I couldn't help butthinking about the egg tarts1 from the little backery across the street.
It's my childhood favorite.
Sure, you can get egg tarts these days inalmost every corner of the world.
But none of them smells or tastes like theones from that backery, at least to me.
And when I went through the front door intothat old house where I grew up, that smell was there welcoming me.
My mother said: "I've just bought yourfavorite egg tarts. Come and have some."
Her tone2 was not really joyful3, butneither emotionless.
What was in it was the warmth4 of a familyto which you can always run back when you think you've had enough out there.
And I was suddenly full of tears in thatmoment.
Cherrish those who treat you with purelove. You don't get a lot of people like that in your life.
Everyone of them is a blessing5 .

1. Take accountability for your mistakes.If you find yourself blaming others, look for your part and take ownership.
2. Sometimes life puts you throughcircumstances that show you who's really there for you. Focus on the ones whoare there and who love and support you, rather than the ones that aren't, orcan't be.
3. Listening is so much more important thantalking. You already know what you know when you open your mouth. When you openyour ears that’s when true learning takes place.
4. Our energy is one of our greatestresources, so it's important to be careful who surrounds us. It's okay to closethe door on negativity. You'll soon see how this preserves your positiveenergy.
5. Travel makes you richer - even if it'snot far from home. Opening your eyes to the world and all the wonders in itwill enrich1 the quality of your life.
6. The older we get, the faster time goes:the only way to slow it down is to be grateful for each moment.
7. Be patient with the world around you,give others the benefit of the doubt, for you are the one who suffers most whenyou're irritated.
8. Comparing yourself to others is thefastest way to put limitations on your potential. Stick with competing with theperson you were yesterday.
9. It is inevitable that bad things willhappen, to you or to someone equally undeserving of pain. These moments aremeant to measure our reactions to the event, and that's where you'll see howstrength is truly defined.
10. Support your friends dreams andencourage them whenever you can. An added benefit is that you'll be happy to besurrounded by people who love their lives.
11. If you want things to change, start bychanging yourself.
12. If you genuinely don't want to dosomething or go somewhere, be honest. No one wants to spend time with you whenyou wish you were somewhere else.
13. Follow your dreams. Don't be afraid ofthem...or what other people think of them. Give it all you've got and you cannever fail.
14. Tell people your dreams, as often asthey are willing to listen. Goals become more tangible when we say them aloud.
15. Align yourself with like-minded people,people who motivate and inspire you, and those that make you feel genuinelyhappy when they are around. Treat them with love and respect.
16. Be a role model: let your actions andyour words be unified. Be someone you'd look up to.

When I was young, my household consisted ofmy mother, my grandmother, and my uncle. I had no contact with my father. Mymother took a passive role in my upbringing causing my grandmother to raise meprimarily. I lost her to severe pneumonia when I was 10.
在我小的时候，家庭是由妈妈、外婆和舅舅组成的。我没有关于父亲的任何音讯。主要是外婆带我，母亲在我的成长过程中所扮演的角色非常被动。（可惜）在我10岁的时候外婆就因患上急性肺炎去世了。
My mother tried to continue mygrandmother's efforts; although, began to fall short. She did not work andwithdrew most days leaving me to my own actions/thoughts. My uncle, who wasproviding all financial support passed when I was 11 leaving my mother andmyself with no financial support.
母亲试图接下外婆的角色（来带我）然而好景不长。她不去工作，也不管我，大部分时间让我想做什么就做什么。11岁以前我和母亲生活，生活费都是舅舅出的，在我和母亲分开以后，就再也没有经济支柱了。
With my mother’s withdrawal from life,little financial skills, and poor organization. I did not have food, clothes,or discipline. After an investigation by child services, I was placed in fostercare. Upon returning to my mother's care, I had lost hope of a"normal" life.
母亲从我的生活淡出，而我也不具备任何挣钱的技能，收容机构的条件也很差，所以我吃不饱、穿不暖，也没有约束。在儿童服务机构调查以后，我被加入了领养儿童名单。想到母亲对我的“照顾”，我对于“正常”的生活也不抱什么希望了。
Prior to placement in foster care, I hadvolunteered at the local hospital to gain hospital experience, since I hadwanted to be a doctor. After the foster home experience, I felt alone anddestitute. I saw no hope of obtaining such a grand educational journey.
在被领养之前，我在当地的一家医院参加志愿者活动，累计了一些医院服务的经验，在那以后我想成为一名医生。在领养家庭的生活让我感觉到孤独与贫困，想到要求学路的漫长和花销，我感到非常的无望。
At the age of 20, my son was born and Ibegan working long hours. I continued to work; although, had many ups and downsalong the path. My mother passed away when I was 23 leaving me with no closefamily.
20岁那年我的儿子出生了，我开始延长工作时间。我一直不停地工作，其中也是波折不断。23岁那年母亲去世，除了我没有什么亲密的家人。
I struggled with the gap in my life andfelt alone, but continued on and was married at the age of 24. My daughter wasborn and I promised myself to strive higher in life. I took a chance andapplied for a better job, which would double my salary —I was accepted!
我感到人生的无常，感到孤独。但是生活依然继续24岁那年我结婚了，我的女儿出生了，我暗自许诺要过更好的生活。我抓住机会申请到了一个更好的工作，工资翻倍，而且被录用了！
My life was again changed due to divorceand a lay-off at 27 years old. For my children, I decided to pursue college andmy dream. Succeed or not, at least I tried. I began at the local communitycollege and was then able to transfer to a 4-year college for a degree inBiology. I applied to 5 medical schools in the area to stay close to mychildren. I was accepted in 2006.
27岁那年我的人生又发生了转折，我离婚还失业了。为了我的孩子，我决定去上学。不管成败与否，最起码我尝试过。我开始在当地的社区大学学习然后才能转入四年制的大学生物专业获得学位。为了和我的孩子们离得近，我申请了5所医学院。2006年我接到了入学通知。
I dedicated myself and did not let anythingdistract me from my goal. I am now a practicing physician and could not behappier. I did eventually become close to my