Legally Clueless

Legally Clueless

Legally Clueless is a weekly podcast by Kenyan media personality & social activist: Adelle Onyango!! Here, she documents her raw human journey as an evolving unapologetically African woman. The podcast is a space where people get to know just how okay it is to not know or not have it all figured out. It is also a space where Africans share stories from their lives; stories that teach, make us cry, make us laugh - real, authentic African stories. The #LegallyClueless hotline is +254768628790

  1. 1 day ago

    Your Body Was Never The Problem | For Mannerless Women

    What if the shame you carry about your body was never yours to begin with? In this episode of For Mannerless Women, Adelle sits down with Connie Tipis, clinical psychologist and Co-Founder & CEO of Double Dee’s Lingerie Kenya & Uganda for a conversation about body shame, body confidence and learning to come home to ourselves. Connie shares how growing up fuller-busted changed the way she moved through the world. She stopped swimming, covered her body and learnt very early that having breasts could attract judgement, assumptions and shame. That experience would eventually lead her to co-found Double Dee’s and spend the next decade having intimate conversations with women about our bodies from inside fitting rooms across East Africa. Adelle and Connie talk about the ways girls learn to hide their bodies, the striking differences Connie has observed between Kenyan and Ugandan women, wearing beautiful underwear for yourself, mirror work, taking pictures of the body you have today, and why caring for your body can look very different when the goal becomes health and longevity rather than making yourself acceptable to other people. IN THIS EPISODE: – How body shame begins for African girls – Growing up fuller-busted and being sexualised early – Why body shame can stop girls from participating in sports – How our upbringing shapes our relationship with our bodies – What Connie has observed about women in Kenya vs Uganda – African traditions around women’s bodies, sexuality and pleasure – Wearing lingerie for yourself, not somebody else – Mirror work and learning to actually look at your body – Why you should take pictures of yourself now – Choosing strength, health and longevity over appearance – Connie’s reminder to become a “selfless, selfish woman” RESOURCES MENTIONED: Double Dee’s Lingerie — Kenya & Uganda https://doubledees.co.ke/ The Sex Lives of African Women by Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah https://www.darkoathewriter.com/sex-lives-of-african-women Seeking Sexual Freedom by Nana Darkoa Sekyiamah https://www.darkoathewriter.com/seeking-sexual-freedom Share this episode with a mannerless or almost-mannerless woman in your life. Follow Legally Clueless Africa and subscribe to For Mannerless Women wherever you get your podcasts. #ForMannerlessWomen #AfricanWomen #BodyImage #BodyShame #BodyConfidence #AfricanPodcast

    Your Body Was Never The Problem | For Mannerless Women

  2. 2 days ago

    10 Of The Worst Pieces Of Advice Women Are Given | Mid Week Tease

    This week on The Mid Week Tease, Adelle is looking at 10 of the worst pieces of advice women are given, in her opinion. From being told to reduce your financial ambitions so you don’t intimidate a man, to submitting for the sake of peace, enduring because “marriage is hard,” putting your career second, maintaining your appearance so a man doesn’t cheat, and being told that ultimately, every woman needs a man. Some of this advice is so familiar that we rarely stop to ask where it came from or who it actually benefits. In this episode, Adelle explores how much of the advice women inherit about love, marriage, motherhood, money and ambition can quietly ask us to shrink, serve, endure and perform in order to fit comfortably into patriarchal expectations. We get into: Why women are still encouraged to make themselves smaller so men don’t feel intimidated.The difference between respect and submission in relationships.Why “keep your marriage private” can sometimes become dangerous advice.How “men are just like that” shifts responsibility from men onto women.The invisible labour hidden inside the idea that women are “the heart of the home.”Why female endurance is so often romanticised as strength.Why a man's fidelity is not a woman's responsibility to manage.The expectation that a woman’s career should be the flexible one once family enters the picture.Why motherhood should be a choice not an inevitable destination for every woman.And the bigger question underneath all of it: what choices would women make if having a man wasn’t treated as one of the greatest validations of our lives?Adelle also reflects on some of the advice she received while married and asks whether some of what previous generations passed down as wisdom may actually have been survival strategies for navigating systems women did not design. Because we can honour the women who survived using those strategies without deciding that we have to inherit them. Connect With Us: Website: https://legallycluelessafrica.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@LegallyCluelessAfrica New episodes of The Mid Week Tease are out every Wednesday.

    10 Of The Worst Pieces Of Advice Women Are Given | Mid Week Tease

  3. 4 days ago

    I Thought I’d Marry Him. Then I Learned the Truth PART 2 | Legally Cueless Ep 393

    What happens when you see the red flags, ask the questions and even find some of the answers but you’re still not ready to let go of the future you imagined with someone? In Part 2 of Ann’s story, we pick up after Ann discovers the first lie in a relationship she believes is leading to marriage. As the relationship continues, Ann and her partner move in together and begin imagining a future. But alongside those plans come more questions. Other women. Stories that don’t quite add up. Moments that leave Ann searching for answers and wondering whether she can trust what she’s being told. Ann takes us through moving in together, investigating one of the women she suspects is connected to her partner, walking away from the relationship, finding her footing in her career, and eventually finding her way back to him. Years into their relationship, they begin seriously talking about marriage and the life they want to build together. And then, seemingly out of nowhere, he tells Ann he has lost interest in her. In this episode, Adelle also shares some of your responses to the question: What’s one lesson your 30s have given you so far? and teases the conversations we’ll be having at For Mannerless Women Live about identity, love, friendship, career, boundaries, starting over and learning to choose yourself. This is Part 2 of Ann’s three-part story. The final part continues next Monday. JOIN THE LEGALLY CLUELESS COMMUNITY Sign up for our newsletter: https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/ Follow Legally Clueless Africa on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/ Follow us on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica Subscribe to our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/LegallyCluelessYoutube SHARE YOUR STORY WITH US Have a story you’d like to share on the Legally Clueless podcast? Submit your story here: https://forms.gle/JMrQD55jcrazKFKX7

    I Thought I’d Marry Him. Then I Learned the Truth PART 2 | Legally Cueless Ep 393

  4. 27 Aug

    How Much Of Yourself Have You Abandoned For Love? | For Mannerless Women

    What happens when loving someone slowly becomes abandoning yourself? In this episode of For Mannerless Women, Adelle Onyango sits down with businesswoman, creative and MC Dushy Kuria for an honest conversation about divorce, relationships, therapy, self-worth and finding your way back to yourself.For the first time, Dushy speaks publicly about her divorce, from what led her into marriage at 26, to the moment she realised that if someone was going to choose her, it had to be her. They unpack the ways women can be conditioned to confuse love with endless sacrifice, why chaos can feel familiar when you haven't experienced calm love, and how low self-esteem can shape the relationships we choose, even when we appear confident on the outside. Dushy also shares the messier side of healing after divorce: partying, dating, missing her marriage, trying again, going to therapy and learning that knowing better doesn't immediately mean doing better. And eventually, finding her way home to herself. In this conversation: Why women can confuse love with self-abandonmentDushy's journey through marriage and divorceSearching for safety through romantic relationshipsThe pressure of being a firstborn daughterConfidence vs. self-esteemWhy chaos can feel like loveWhat therapy taught Dushy about why she stayedThe messy, nonlinear reality of healingRebuilding self-trust after a relationshipLearning to leave relationships soonerFinding safety within yourselfRediscovering the parts of yourself you lost in loveLetting go of the need to be chosenWhat healthy love and marriage mean to Dushy nowDushy also shares Maya Angelou's Still I Rise as her Mannerless Message, a powerful reminder of our capacity to rise, rebuild and reclaim ourselves. CONNECT WITH DUSHY: https://www.instagram.com/dushykuria CONNECT WITH LEGALLY CLUELESS AFRICA: Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@LegallyClueless Website: https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/ Subscribe/follow For Mannerless Women wherever you get your podcasts and share this episode with a woman who might need the reminder: choosing yourself isn't selfish, sometimes, it's how you find your way back home. #ForMannerlessWomen #DushyKuria #SelfAbandonment #ChoosingYourself #HealingAfterDivorce #SelfTrust #Relationships #AfricanWomen #LegallyCluelessAfrica

    How Much Of Yourself Have You Abandoned For Love? | For Mannerless Women

  5. 25 Aug

    The Lies We Tell Ourselves To Stay In Relationships | Mid Week Tease

    Sometimes the hardest part isn't realising a relationship isn't working. It's admitting that you've known for a while.This week on the Mid Week Tease, Adelle unpacks the stories we tell ourselves when we're trying to stay in relationships we've already begun to outgrow: maybe I need to give it more time, maybe I'm expecting too much, but they're a good person, maybe I haven't communicated clearly enough, what if I regret leaving? She explores self-abandonment, the sunk-cost fallacy, our attachment to potential, the difference between intuition and anxiety, and why we sometimes keep asking for another sign when our bodies have been giving us information all along. Plus, a question worth sitting with:If you trusted yourself completely, what would you already know? In this episode: Why “relationships are hard” can keep us tolerating chronic unhappinessFalling in love with someone's potential instead of the relationship you actually haveWhy someone doesn't have to be a bad person for you to leaveThe sunk-cost fallacy and staying because you've already invested yearsWhen communication becomes negotiating against realityListening to your gut without treating every uncomfortable feeling as intuitionWhy fear of what comes after leaving can masquerade as uncertainty about whether to leaveHow self-abandonment slowly erodes self-trustQuestions to ask yourself when you know something isn't workingNew episodes of the Mid Week Tease every Wednesday. JOIN THE LEGALLY CLUELESS COMMUNITY Sign up for our newsletter: https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/ Follow Legally Clueless Africa on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/ Follow us on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica Subscribe to our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/LegallyCluelessYoutube SHARE YOUR STORY WITH US Have a story you’d like to share on the Legally Clueless podcast? Submit it here: https://forms.gle/JMrQD55jcrazKFKX7

    The Lies We Tell Ourselves To Stay In Relationships | Mid Week Tease

  6. 23 Aug

    I Thought I’d Marry Him. Then I Learned the Truth | Legally Clueless Ep 392

    What happens when the beliefs you have about love, marriage and relationships are shaped long before you ever fall in love? In Part 1 of Ann Wachera’s story, Ann takes us back to losing her mum at just seven years old, being raised by her grandparents and the experiences that shaped how she came to understand womanhood, sex, pregnancy and marriage.Years later, at university, Ann meets a man she believes could be the soulmate she has always imagined. What starts as a very sweet campus crush grows into a serious relationship but Ann has always been someone who asks questions, searches for answers and wants to know the truth. So when she hears something about her boyfriend’s past that doesn’t match what he has told her, she goes looking for answers. And she finds her first lie. In this episode, Adelle also shares more about For Mannerless Women Live, happening on 26th September at Trademark Suites at Enaki Town, and teases one of the conversations we’ll be having about what our 30s actually teach us about identity, starting over, boundaries, love, career, motherhood, choosing to be childfree and shame. This is Part 1 of Ann Wachera’s three-part story. Part 2 continues next Monday. JOIN THE LEGALLY CLUELESS COMMUNITY Sign up for our newsletter: https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/ Follow Legally Clueless Africa on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/legallycluelessafrica/ Follow us on TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@legallycluelessafrica Subscribe to our YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/c/LegallyCluelessYoutube SHARE YOUR STORY WITH US Have a story you’d like to share on the Legally Clueless podcast? Submit it here: https://forms.gle/JMrQD55jcrazKFKX7

    I Thought I’d Marry Him. Then I Learned the Truth | Legally Clueless Ep 392

  7. 20 Aug

    Starting Over in Your 40s: The Life You Didn’t Plan | For Mannerless Women

    Season 6 of For Mannerless Women is here and we're beginning with the brilliant Kaz Lucas. What happens when the life you're living no longer looks like the life women are told we're supposed to want? In this episode, Adelle sits down with Kaz for a deeply honest conversation about divorce in your 40s, grief, loneliness, being childfree, queer womanhood, friendship, community and the courage it takes to build a life outside society's expectations. Kaz opens up about navigating separation and the grief of losing not only a relationship, but the future she thought she would have. She shares why being lonely on her own feels different from being lonely inside a relationship, how she's learning to sit with difficult emotions instead of numbing them, and what it means to come home to yourself even when that journey can feel lonely. They also reflect on losing their mothers, carrying grief through different chapters of adulthood, finding connection with their ancestors, and learning to recognise beauty and magic even while life is difficult. Kaz shares the story behind reopening her pole and movement studio and why she's intentionally creating a shame-free, judgement-free space where women, queer people, Kenyans and Africans can move their bodies, find community and simply be. The conversation also explores the relationships we're taught to prioritise. What happens when we stop placing romantic relationships at the centre of our lives? What could our friendships become if we poured the same intentionality into them? And how do we create community when the structures around us were largely designed for people who followed the conventional path? Kaz's Mannerless Message: "The hardest thing you're ever going to have to do is learn to forgive yourself. Your biggest relationship with any human being is going to be the relationship that you have with yourself.” In this episode: Grief and losing a motherStarting over in your 40sDivorce, separation and the grief of an imagined futureChoosing yourself after a relationship endsBeing childfree in your 40sLoneliness outside conventional womanhood *Queer identity, shame and belongingBuilding intentional female friendshipsLearning to sit with difficult emotionsPole dancing, body connection and shameBuilding community outside traditional structuresCreating safe spaces for African women and queer peopleForgiving yourself and coming home to who you are CONNECT WITH KAZ LUCAS: Website: https://www.kazentertainment.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kazkarenlucas TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@kazkarenlucas BIRDS OF PARADISE STUDIO Website: https://www.kazentertainment.com/birdsofparadisepoledancestudio Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/birdsofparadisestudio/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@birdsofparadisestudio FOR MANNERLESS WOMEN LIVE For the first time ever, we're bringing For Mannerless Women off your screen and into a room full of African women. For Mannerless Women Live takes place on 26 September 2026 at Trademark Suites, Enaki Town, Nairobi. Find out more: https://www.legallycluelessafrica.com/events

    Starting Over in Your 40s: The Life You Didn’t Plan | For Mannerless Women

  8. 18 Aug

    Would You Let Anyone Else Talk To You Like This? | Mid Week Tease

    What happens when the person you hear most is constantly criticising you? This week on the Mid Week Tease, Adelle unpacks negative self-talk: the cruel, critical and sometimes deeply familiar voice we can mistake for our own truth. She explores where our inner critic comes from, why being hard on ourselves can feel like a form of motivation or protection, and the important question we rarely stop to ask: whose voice is this? Adelle also gets into how negative self-talk can shape our confidence, relationships, willingness to take risks and even the identities we build around our mistakes. Plus, practical ways to change your inner dialogue without forcing yourself into positive affirmations you don't actually believe.Because the goal isn't to tell yourself you're amazing every minute of the day. It's to build an inner voice that can be honest, accountable and compassionate a voice that feels safe to come home to. Plus, a special thank you to everyone who got their ticket to the now sold-out For Mannerless Women Live! Ticket holders, keep an eye on your email and the Legally Clueless socials as we share updates in the lead-up to the event. In this episode: How to recognise negative self-talkWhere your inner critic may have come fromWhy self-criticism can masquerade as motivationThe difference between accountability and crueltyHow the inner critic turns experiences into identitiesWhy “Whose voice is this?” is such a powerful questionHow to replace cruel thoughts with more accurate onesBuilding an inner voice you can actually trustNew Mid Week Tease episodes every Wednesday. Stay connected with Legally Clueless Africa: Website: legallycluelessafrica.com Instagram: @legallycluelessafrica YouTube: Legally Clueless Africa Join the Legally Clueless Africa newsletter: Sign up via legallycluelessafrica.com

    Would You Let Anyone Else Talk To You Like This? | Mid Week Tease
See All (566)

Hosts & Guests

Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
5 Ratings

About

Legally Clueless is a weekly podcast by Kenyan media personality & social activist: Adelle Onyango!! Here, she documents her raw human journey as an evolving unapologetically African woman. The podcast is a space where people get to know just how okay it is to not know or not have it all figured out. It is also a space where Africans share stories from their lives; stories that teach, make us cry, make us laugh - real, authentic African stories. The #LegallyClueless hotline is +254768628790

Information

  • Creator
    Legally Clueless
  • Years Active
    2019 - 2026
  • Episodes
    566
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright Legally Clueless
  • Show Website
    Legally Clueless

You Might Also Like