A LITTLE MORE IMPERFECTS

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The Imperfects

Hugh van Cuylenburg, Ryan Shelton & Josh van Cuylenburg

We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

  1. Janelle Booker & Hamish Blake - The ADHD Playbook for Parents

    6 hr ago

    Janelle Booker & Hamish Blake - The ADHD Playbook for Parents

    How do you raise a child whose brain works differently? This episode is for parents of kids with ADHD. And parents who have ADHD. And people who don’t have a diagnosis, but would consider themselves ‘fast and loose’. And for everyone who knows someone who fits the above criteria. 💌Join 8,300+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Janelle Booker, a psychologist who specialises in ADHD, is BACK, this time, to talk to parents of ADHD kids, and how to parent when you yourself have ADHD. And also, ADHD-curious Hamish Blake is here too. We look at the role of dopamine, energy vs stressors, and how to make your mornings less chaotic and more compassionate. Hamish and Janelle. What a duo. 0:00 – A dynamic duo: Hamish and Janelle5:58 – The penny drop moment for Hugh11:35 – ADHD or Fast and Loose?19:56 – The beauty and beast of ADHD brains22:38 – The life of an ADHD kid27:16 – A crash course on dopamine37:26 – Structure, sleep and school44:38 – Identity and diagnosis55:13 – ADHD kids and friendships1:02:50 – Parenting WITH ADHD1:16:29 – Finding and supporting regulation1:23:13 – Slo-pamine1:28:54 – Let’s talk about the strengths1:34:35 – Get ‘em outside! If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/WwEBTIMohwg 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Janelle Booker - Living With ADHD - https://bit.ly/4g0CUXK Hugh’s ADHD…brief - https://bit.ly/4g567Rw Maria Ruberto - Advancing Despite Adversity - https://bit.ly/4uYFbGS 💻Things to check out Janelle’s website - https://bit.ly/3QJdO5t The MEHRIT Centre - https://self-reg.ca/ The ADHD Parent Circle Online Program - https://bit.ly/4g5Anvu ADHD Women’s Support Group (Perinatal and Early Parenting) - https://bit.ly/3T0BJ0N Online Q&A with Janelle about ADHD parenting - https://bit.ly/4g5wneu 📖Things to read ADHD: A Delightful Human Difference. Reframing ADHD for Good, by Janelle Booker and Matthew Johnson - https://bit.ly/4w7scU3 🎧Things to listen to Hamish & Andy podcast - https://bit.ly/43Z0RHJ Controlling Your Dopamine For Motivation, Focus & Satisfaction, by Huberman Lab - https://bit.ly/4xPnMCZ 🏆Competitions to enter Imperfects LIVE at the Balwyn Cinema Gold Class Double Pass - https://bit.ly/3S0E0Zr 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1hr 43min
  2. Jimmy Wales (Wikipedia) - In Trust We Trust

    21 Jun

    Jimmy Wales (Wikipedia) - In Trust We Trust

    How do you choose who to trust? And how do you show others that you are trustworthy? 💌Join 8,100+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy In this Academy of Imperfection, we are joined by Jimmy Wales, co-founder of Wikipedia. No biggie (BIG biggie). And if there’s one thing Jimmy knows, it's how to garner and imbue the trust of millions. You’re right in feeling like the general level of trust globally is low right now, but this episode is here to step through Jimmy's 7 rules which will help you build, rebuild, and solidify what is in our innate human behaviour. Trust is important, and so is this conversation. 0:00 – BIG deal on the internet8:41 – The heart behind it all14:57 – Trust is always personal20:22 – It’s human nature23:33 – Good guys of the internet30:35 – Don’t take sides38:23 – The circle of trust40:15 – Own up46:03 – Let’s call them a civil person If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/Z1SPClxSfYI 📖 Things to read The Seven Rules of Trust, by Jimmy Wales - https://bit.ly/4vi83uA 🎧Things to listen to How to Build (And Rebuild) Trust with Frances Frei - https://bit.ly/4vfMMSl 🏆Competitions to enter Imperfects LIVE at the Balwyn Cinema Gold Class Double Pass - https://bit.ly/3S0E0Zr 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1hr 3min
  3. Dr Emily - You're Full of Grit

    14 Jun

    Dr Emily - You're Full of Grit

    Do you think you have grit? 💌Join 8,000+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Research has shown that the most common characteristic of elite performers and high achievers is grit. Understood as the passion and perseverance for very long term goals, Grit is not about natural ability or talent, but rather how we choose to grow. Your favourite resident psychologist, Dr Emily Musgrove, is back in the studio this week to talk about how you can become a grittier person! We also look inward, as Josh asks how to maintain grit when it feels like your inner critic is overwhelmingly loud. Dr Em, so great to have you back. 0:00 – Down with the nonchalance! 5:43 – Talent vs Excellence10:40 – Interested in finding your interests16:42 – For the non-naturals in the room 24:22 – Effort is essential for excellence 32:17 – Practicing, kindly 35:01 – Hope is earned 42:06 – The good and bad criticism53:45 – Encountering pain and discomfort 59:54 – For the greater good 1:06:09 – The dark side of perseverance If you want to watch this full episode on YouTube, click here - https://youtu.be/JmcLV7DGL4k  🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Dyson Heppell - Whatever It Takes… To Forgive - https://bit.ly/4egeneO Nedd Brockmann - The Man, The Myth, The Neddgend - https://bit.ly/4egfATo Dr Emily - Hope - https://bit.ly/43YalTr Bri Lee - Babies+Climate=Anxiety - https://bit.ly/4xlrYdl How I Built ‘Dis’ - The Resilience Project Story - https://bit.ly/4aH0dSP 📚Things to read Grit: The Power of Passion and Perseverance by Angela Duckworth - https://bit.ly/4vzoe6o Self-efficacy, by Albert Bandura - https://bit.ly/4fx4KdW Master of Change, by Brad Stulberg - https://bit.ly/4xCbUEv Peak: Secrets from the New Science of Expertise, by Anders Ericsson - https://bit.ly/3Q9cIje 📺Things to watch THE GAP, by Ira Glass - https://bit.ly/4xjkuHL ⭐️Things to donate to JMB Foundation - https://jmbfoundation.org.au 🏆Competitions to enter Imperfects LIVE at the Balwyn Cinema Gold Class Double Pass - https://bit.ly/3S0E0Zr 🎟️Things to buy tickets to Imperfects LIVE at the Balwyn Cinema - https://bit.ly/4vq9JSr 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1hr 17min
  4. Ellyse Perry - It Starts With Trying

    7 Jun

    Ellyse Perry - It Starts With Trying

    At just 16, Ellyse Perry was the youngest person to ever debut for the Australian International Cricket team. 13 days later, Ellyse debuted for the Matildas. 💌Join 7,800+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Arguably one of the greatest athletes of our time, Hugh, Ryan and Josh chat to Ellyse about how she stays so grounded amidst her incredible success, and whether she is able to separate who she is from what she does. Ellyse chats to the guys about her relationship with her dad (Josh and Hugh furiously take notes), and how both her parents were able to instil a love of trying rather than winning. And then we get onto social anxiety; what it feels like for Ellyse, why she loves silent retreats, and how she manages it in front of her fans. Ellyse, you are a literal ray of sunshine. Please come back anytime. If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - https://youtu.be/xAZeLzcG43Y  0:00 – Is THAT AI?5:05 – Running (and bowling) it’s natural course11:24 – The feeling of not trying17:18 – Parents: Be A Good Sport29:22 – Prepare to be disappointed40:23 – Bitter sweet World Cup46:48 – The complexity of ego1:03:54 – Practicing presence1:10:30 – Hugh’s advice for big moments 🫖Imperfects episodes mentioned on this episode Pat Cummins - Love, Loss & Life - (1:14:20) - https://bit.ly/3PRku11 WHO ARE YOU? with Dr Emily (+ secret code word) - (17:20) - https://bit.ly/4e1SxeV 📖 Things to read Perspective by Ellyse Perry - (29:22) - https://bit.ly/3PSMaCI Ellyse Perry’s children’s books - https://bit.ly/4e1TyDM Thinking, Fast and Slow by Daniel Kahneman - (1:11:40) - https://bit.ly/437yxT9 📺Things to watch Carl Sagan’s Pale Blue Dot - (1:17:27) - https://bit.ly/3PSPKNa 🏆Competitions to enter Imperfects LIVE at the Balwyn Cinema Gold Class Double Pass - https://bit.ly/3S0E0Zr 🎟️Things to buy tickets to Imperfects LIVE at the Balwyn Cinema - https://bit.ly/4vq9JSr 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1hr 21min
  5. WHO ARE YOU? with Dr Emily (+ secret code word)

    1 Jun • Subscribers Only

    WHO ARE YOU? with Dr Emily (+ secret code word)

    ⭐️CODE WORD REVEAL⭐️ In the first 10% of this episode, we have a huge announcement to make! On August 19th, at the Balwyn Cinema, Dr Emily will join Hugh, Ryan and Josh for our first EVER live podcast recording, answering YOUR questions…. AND there’ll be time to hang out after. PLUS you could WIN your way there. The competition is open now - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/balwyn-entry/ And tickets will go on sale Monday June 8 - https://bit.ly/4dI7Cn4 AND most importantly, you must be an *A Little More Imperfects* subscriber, with the codeword (lowercase), to enter either the competition or buy tickets. In the other 90% of this episode, Dr Emily is back, baby, to answer your questions about identity. We’re talking how to deal with external validation, midlife, and the age old questions ‘who am I?’ We chat through the liminal space of the before and after of big life events, where you’re not who you were before, and you’re not sure who you are after. And how you can show up in your life as your authentic self when you’re not really sure who you are. But one more time for the people in the back Enter the competition here - https://www.theimperfects.com.au/balwyn-entry/ Buy tickets (on Monday June 8) here - https://bit.ly/4dI7Cn4 🫖 Other links linked in this episode - Dr Emily - The Meaning of Mid-Life - https://bit.ly/4uJ0EUE - Erikson’s Stages of Development - https://bit.ly/4xg8yH0 - Chip Conley’s research - https://bit.ly/4x1dcZc - Dr Edna Lekabe - New Baby … New Brain … Matrescence - https://bit.ly/4ef4Aqr - Eckhart Tolle works - https://bit.ly/4x251vy

    1hr 2min
  6. Ryan Holiday - A Stoic Life & Death

    31 May

    Ryan Holiday - A Stoic Life & Death

    We can’t control what happens to us, but we can control how we respond. At least, that’s what the Stoic’s say. 💌Join 7,500+ people getting our takeaways and favourite moments from this episode in our weekly newsletter - http://bit.ly/45NyQDy Today we are joined (deep breath Hugh) by Stoic philosopher Ryan Holiday. Using the wisdom of the past to appreciate the present, Ryan’s work is dedicated to communicating how the practicalities of stoic philosophy can help us lead more present, mindful and resilient lives today. In this incredible chat, Hugh, Josh and Ryan (our Ryan), each present Ryan Holiday with something they have been struggling with in their own lives. Through the lens of Stoic philosophers Marcus Aurelius, Seneca and Epictetus, Ryan Holiday talks to how stoicism can really help us to live into our values, prioritise presence, and deal with existential dread. We discuss with Ryan the importance of understanding what will actually make you happy (spoiler: it’s not a billion dollars), and how to reframe death as a reminder that we must appreciate every moment (or not waste anymore with shame and guilt). This episode, and its practical take-aways (which you can find listed in our newsletter), has been a long time coming. Ryan, what an absolute honour. 0:00 – What is Stoicism? 13:26 – For the Josh’s of the world 17:07 – Time and Energy of Worrying 27:01 – The illusion of freedom 33:50 – Am I a bad friend? 38:58 – Practicing what you preach ft. presence 45:42 – If today was your last day 50:22 – 5 quotes for a Stoic life If you’d like to watch this full episode on YouTube, follow this link - 🫖 Imperfects episodes mentioned in this episode Pat Cummins - Love, Loss & Life - https://bit.ly/4dHKR2F Maria Ruberto - Sleep Your Way To Your Top - https://bit.ly/4dHKPYB 📖 Things to read Letter’s from a Stoic by Seneca - https://bit.ly/49WVNqB ALL of Ryan’s books - https://bit.ly/43uHsxZ ✍️Journals to journal The Daily Stoic - https://bit.ly/49qJ6Em My Imperfect Life - https://bit.ly/4tZ8qJ6 🎟️ Things to get tickets to Daily Stoic Live with Ryan Holiday - https://bit.ly/4uK72Lt 💻Things to check out Ryan’s website - https://bit.ly/4v3Vh24 The Resilience Project - https://bit.ly/3Q4LOc4 🩷To host your own Vulnerabilitea House, purchase here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuWz 🩵To purchase our journal (or your novel) My Imperfect Life, click here - http://bit.ly/4lyuuW 🩵To join our subscriber community, A Little More Imperfects, follow this link - http://bit.ly/4mqunxu 🩷 AND you can subscribe to A Little More Imperfects through Apple Podcasts too, here - http://apple.co/theimperfects The Imperfects is not a licensed mental health service and is not a substitute for professional mental health advice, treatment or assessment. The advice given in this episode is general in nature, but if you’re struggling, please see a healthcare professional, or call lifeline on 13 11 14.   See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

    1hr 15min

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About

We’re all imperfect. On this podcast, founder of The Resilience Project Hugh van Cuylenburg, his good friend Ryan Shelton, and only one of their brothers, Josh van Cuylenburg, talks to a variety of interesting people who vulnerably share their own struggles and imperfections, or expertly pass on their wisdom on the subject of imperfection. Whether it’s in The Vulnerabilitea House, The Academy of Imperfection, or with our very own psychologist, Dr Emily, The Imperfects are here to find some valuable takeaways we can all apply to our own imperfect lives.

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