Shan Boodram

Émissions

Épisodes

  1. Is It Wrong to Still Want Attention if You’re in a Relationship ft. Lauren Morrison

    -2 J

    Is It Wrong to Still Want Attention if You’re in a Relationship ft. Lauren Morrison

    Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join the world's largest sex school and access 150+ courses for curious adults: https://beduc.at/bg2620-boody  ------ In this episode of Lovers, I sit down with my sister Lauren Morrison to say something ick: we both still enjoy attention from men. While we prepare for Mash Majesty, our section for Toronto Caribbean Carnival, we’ve been having important conversations around what carnival represents for us, and in addition to community and culture, it’s also a day to flirt with the gaze!  In this episode, we talk about how motherhood, marriage, long-term partnership, and aging can shift the way women experience themselves socially and romantically, especially in a culture that simultaneously rewards female desirability while shaming women for acknowledging that they enjoy it. Together, we unpack why so many women quietly miss feeling desired, why being loved and being wanted are not always the same emotional experience, and how spaces like Carnival and Mash Majesty can reconnect women to embodiment, visibility, sensuality, play, and freedom without shame. This episode is deeply personal, but it’s also connected to the spirit behind Mash Majesty itself: creating a space where women can feel expressive, magnetic, joyful, powerful, sensual, seen, and fully alive in their bodies. If you’ve ever questioned whether it’s shallow to enjoy attention, missed feeling desired in your relationship, or struggled with how motherhood, aging, or partnership changed the way the world responds to you, this conversation is for you. Join us for Toronto Caribbean Carnival August 1st, 2026 https://tribal.masos.app/events/b73d9cf9-ca8b-4d97-b7c8-a2511cec0b35/sections/db97e350-5840-448f-ba03-ff461464549c Follow Lauren Morrison → Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachlaurenmorrison/→ Get Lauren’s new book https://www.amazon.com/Be-Room-Shrinking-Leading-Purpose/dp/B0FM4HGYSP→ Sign up for a free coaching consultation with Lauren https://www.beintheroomcoaching.com/work-with-lauren Want more Lover? Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com  Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter  Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    1 h 15 min
  2. Corn Addiction & The Orgasm Gap w/ Shan Boodram

    -6 J

    Corn Addiction & The Orgasm Gap w/ Shan Boodram

    Sexologist, Shan Boodram joins me to discuss porn, the orgasm gap, and so much more. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

    45 min
  3. This Changes How You See Avoidantly Attached People ft. Dr. Amir Levine

    6 MAI

    This Changes How You See Avoidantly Attached People ft. Dr. Amir Levine

    Showing love to our sponsor Arya. You deserve a novelty and pleasure in your intimate, ESPECIALLY in light of Mothers’ Day. Head to https://www.arya.fyi/mothersday to learn more Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join the world's largest sex school and access 150+ courses for curious adults: https://beduc.at/bg2619-boody  —————————— How much of your attachment style is actually formed in childhood? In this episode, Shan sits down with renowned psychiatrist and attachment expert Dr. Amir Levine to unpack the myths around attachment theory and why attachment styles are far more flexible than people think. Dr. Levine explores the nuances of anxious, avoidant, and secure attachment, with a specific emphasis on avoidant attachment and the misconceptions surrounding it in modern dating culture. He explains why attachment is better understood as a belief system rather than a fixed diagnosis, revisits the groundbreaking “Strange Situation” experiment developed by Mary Ainsworth, and shares practical tools like the Tennis Wall of Love and the C.A.R.R.P. method to help build healthier, more secure relationships. The conversation also explores how technology and modern communication have completely changed the way we connect, date, and experience intimacy today. Follow Dr. Amir Take his MasterClass on The Science of Connection → https://www.masterclass.com/classes/the-science-of-connection Get His New Book Secure → https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/secure-amir-levine/1148276412 Get His Bestselling Book Attached: The New Science of Adult Attachment and How It Can Help You Find and Keep Love → https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/attached-amir-levine/1102355415 Connect with Dr. Amir → https://amirlevinemd.com Want more Lover? Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com  Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter  Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    58 min
  4. This Kama Sutra Secret About Hands Changes Everything

    29 AVR.

    This Kama Sutra Secret About Hands Changes Everything

    Showing love to our sponsor Biologica. Take their Quick Hormonal Life Stage Quiz to find the formula that’s right for you, and get up to 32% on your purchase: https://biologica.com/lovers  Thanks to Cozy Earth for sponsoring this episode. Go to cozyearth.com/LOVERS for up to 20% off!  Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join the world's largest sex school and access 150+ courses for curious adults: https://beducate.me/shanboody.  —————————— What does the Kama Sutra say about hands? In this episode, Shan sits down with storyteller and pleasure educator Seema Anand to explore one of the most overlooked (and underestimated) tools of intimacy: your hands. Recorded live in London in front of an audience of sex educators and pleasure-positive voices, this conversation focuses on expanding your pleasure potential, with a special emphasis on hand sex, as we celebrate the launch of our brand new Käma jewelry collection, inspired by the Kama Sutra. Seema shares what the Kama Sutra actually teaches about touch, including specific finger combinations, how intention shapes sensation, and why hands play a central role in pleasure. We also explore the connection between the Kama Sutra and lunar phases, rethink the art of foreplay, and touch on the idea of being multi-orgasmic, and what that can look like. 💎 Shop our new KAMA ring collection. Shop the collection: https://surmeyi.com/kama RSVP to our Tell-ALL Part 🎉Tuesday, May 5th at 11AM PST. https://community.loversbyshan.com/c/podcast/tell-all-pleasure-party-w-seema-anand-0454f07b-12ae-40ae-b0e6-1f5a167f721a  Watch Seema’s Previous Podcast EpisodesKama Sutra Secrets Every Woman Deserves to Know: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2Pj2rTHLyk The Kama Sutra Secret ‪@SeemaAnandStoryTelling‬ Wants the World to Know About: https://youtu.be/HfrQynAqKjo Follow SeemaGet her book Speak Easy → https://www.amazon.com/Speak-Easy-Filed-Longing-Intimacy/dp/9361319337 Instagram → https://www.instagram.com/seemaanandstorytelling/?hl=enSubscribe to her YouTube Channel → https://www.youtube.com/@SeemaAnandStoryTelling  Want more Lover? Shan’s AI trained to give you her advice → http://loversbyshan.com  Get a free weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter  Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community  Explore free quizzes + worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes  Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    54 min
  5. I Spent Years Forcing Relationships… Here’s What I Learned ft. Affion Crockett

    15 AVR.

    I Spent Years Forcing Relationships… Here’s What I Learned ft. Affion Crockett

    Shout out to the sponsor of this episode Tonal. Right now, Tonal is offering our listeners $200 off your Tonal purchase. Just go to tonal.com and use promo code LOVERS. Big love to the sponsor of this episode, Masterclass. Right now, our listeners get an additional 15% off any MasterClass annual membership at https://www.masterclass.com/lovers  ——————— In this episode of Lovers, I sit down with Affion Crockett for a conversation about love, timing, and what it really takes to build a relationship that works. Affion is actually part of my own love story. He’s the reason Jared and I met. But in this conversation, we turn the lens on him. Now in his 50s, after years of dating, therapy, and the loss of his father, Affion shares that he finally feels clear on what he’s looking for in a partner, and what he’s no longer willing to force. For a long time, he believed in the idea that if you try hard enough, you can make a relationship work. But watching his father spend years in an unhappy marriage, and ultimately pass away still carrying that weight, changed how he sees love completely. We talk about why some relationships aren’t meant to work no matter how much effort you put in, why “happy wife, happy life” doesn’t always lead to real fulfillment, and what it looks like to pursue a relationship that actually adds to your life instead of draining it. This isn’t a story about giving up on love. It’s about getting honest about what love should feel like, and having the clarity to wait for the right fit. If you’ve ever tried to make something work that just didn’t click, or wondered if it’s too late to find the kind of relationship you really want, this episode is for you. Want to manifest a love that FEELS exactly as you’ve always dreamt it would (in your wildest dreams)? Get specific with that language using our LOVERS feelings wheel + Romantic Wishlist worksheet https://www.loversbyshan.com/resource/the-feelings-wheel---newsletter-subscribers-only   Follow Affion CrockettInstagram → https://www.instagram.com/affioncrockett/Watch A Hip-Hop Story Now → https://www.ahiphopstory.com/  Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    1 h 3 min
  6. The Secret to Attracting a Husband, Not Just a Boyfriend ft. Kamie Crawford

    8 AVR.

    The Secret to Attracting a Husband, Not Just a Boyfriend ft. Kamie Crawford

    Thanks to Squarespace for sponsoring this episode. Head to www.squarespace.com/LOVERS for a free trial, and when you’re ready to launch, use CODE: LOVERS to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain.Sex is a skill, and you can learn how to be the best lover in bed! Join Beducated today at https://beducate.me/loversapril. Lots of love to our sponsor, Quince. Go to Quince.com/LOVERS for free shipping and 365-day returns. -------------------  In this episode of Lovers, Kamie Crawford returns for a third time, and this time, she’s engaged. When Kamie first came on the podcast, she was coming out of a very public breakup and rebuilding her life from the ground up. In her second appearance, she shared a mindset that sparked a lot of conversation: “I’m not a girlfriend, I want to be a wife.” She was dating with intention, holding high standards, and refusing to entertain anything that didn’t align with the life she actually wanted. People had a lot to say. Some called it unrealistic. Others said her standards were too high. Now she’s back, engaged to the love of her life, in a relationship that didn’t just meet her standards but exceeded them. In this conversation, we talk about what it looks like to hold your standards in dating, how to navigate criticism when people tell you you’re asking for too much, and why the language you use around love, marriage, and your future actually shapes what you experience. Kamie shares how she approached dating with intention, why she refused to shrink her desires to be more “realistic,” and what happened when she chose to dream bigger instead. If you’ve ever been told to lower your standards, questioned whether you’re asking for too much, or wondered if holding out for the kind of love you actually want is worth it, this episode is for you.Watch our other interviews with Kamie Crawford on LOVERS:2021: How to Look at a Breakup Differently → https://youtu.be/vSc0hF__y_4?si=E9u8zKsxdCEBbG8r 2023: This is What Happens When a Single Woman Turns 30 → https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vSc0hF__y_4 Want to manifest a love that FEELS exactly as you’ve always dreamt it would (in your wildest dreams)? Get specific with that language using our LOVERS feelings wheel + Romantic Wishlist worksheet → https://www.loversbyshan.com/resource/the-feelings-wheel---newsletter-subscribers-onlyFollow Kamie CrawfordInstagram → https://www.instagram.com/kamiecrawford/Watch her podcast Relationshipshit → https://www.youtube.com/@relationshitpodWebsite → https://www.kamiecrawford.com/  Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    1 h 12 min
  7. The Year I Decided I’d Never Divorce My Husband

    22 AVR.

    The Year I Decided I’d Never Divorce My Husband

    Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join the world's largest sex school and access 150+ courses for curious adults: https://beducate.me/shan2026  —---------  In this episode of Lovers, Jared and I sit down on vacation for a conversation we’ve never had this honestly before. This is our seventh year of marriage, the year people warn you about. The year of the “seven-year itch.” And while we’ve built a life together, kids, history, love, this was the first year I really sat with a truth that surprised even me. For a long time, I wasn’t fully certain we would stay married forever. In this conversation, we talk about what it actually feels like to be years into a relationship, how having children changes the dynamic between partners, and why even strong marriages go through seasons of doubt, distance, and recalibration. We share the fears we had going into year seven, the honest ways our relationship has been tested, and what ultimately shifted for me to say, fully and consciously, that this is the person I’m choosing for life. This episode isn’t about perfect love. It’s about commitment, growth, and what it really takes to stay. If you’ve ever wondered whether your relationship can survive the hard seasons, or questioned what long-term love is supposed to feel like, this conversation is for you. Follow Jared BradyInstagram → https://www.instagram.com/enjoyjaredbradySubscribe to his YouTube → https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKVWwEy39GLNzKXXt9v46TA  Want more Lover Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newslette Join the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/community Explore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    37 min
  8. Why “Normal” Sex Doesn’t Work for Many Black and Brown Women Ft. Aida Mariam Davis

    25 MARS

    Why “Normal” Sex Doesn’t Work for Many Black and Brown Women Ft. Aida Mariam Davis

    Get $200 off your Tonal purchase! Get a complete gym + a trainer in your home by going to http://tonal.com, then use promo code LOVERS for that big discount.—In this episode of Lovers, I’m joined by Aida Mariam Davis, author of Kindred Creation: Parables and Paradigms for Freedom, to explore one question: Is your sex life by design?We unpack the idea that so much of our sexual identity isn’t accidental, it’s constructed. From childhood messaging that disconnects us from our bodies, to adulthood expectations that swing between repression and performance, Aida breaks down how Western culture creates a fragmented relationship with intimacy. The result? A sex life that often feels confusing, isolating, or performative rather than intentional and embodied.Together, we explore what it looks like to reclaim your sexuality on your own terms. Aida shares how her relationship with her husband was rooted in freedom, patience, and self-possession, not pressure or performance, and how that created the foundation for deeper intimacy, trust, and desire.This conversation will challenge what you’ve been taught about sex, and invite you to design something that actually fits you. Resources mentioned→ What If Your Sex Life Is By Design? | Intimate Life Audit: https://www.loversbyshan.com/resource/what-if-your-sex-life-is-by-design-intimate-life-audit → A Guide to the Sexual Journey As We Grow: https://www.loversbyshan.com/resource/normal-sexual-development-from-0-18  Follow Aida Mariam Davis→ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/aidamariam/→ Learn more about Decolonize Design: https://www.decolonizedesign.com/ → Get her book Kindred Creation: Parables and Paradigms for Freedom https://rep.club/products/kindred-creation?srsltid=AfmBOor4haNsPUvlYWcMk7oxSWdcmG-yZCTBeLjGtTDoFO_IaJXU_Jwj   Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    58 min
  9. Shan Boodram (intimacy expert)

    11/06/2025

    Shan Boodram (intimacy expert)

    Shan Boodram (Too Hot to Handle, Lovers by Shan, The Art of Sex Appeal) is a certified sex educator, intimacy expert, and sexologist. Shan joins the Armchair Expert to discuss the exoticism of Americans to Canadians, connecting intimacy to something specific or unusual, and that sexuality can be found playing in a facet of shared humanity. Shan and Dax talk about growing up as a precocious child with an interest in the sexual, how her mission became how to make sex education sexy, and the relationship between how porn looks and the perception of sex in different countries. Shan explains improvements in the orgasm gap, why it’s hotter to be direct rather than sneaky with your desire, and giving birth to the squirt. Follow Armchair Expert on the Wondery App or wherever you get your podcasts. Watch new content on YouTube or listen to Armchair Expert early and ad-free by joining Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts, or Spotify. Start your free trial by visiting wondery.com/links/armchair-expert-with-dax-shepard/ now. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

    1 h 49 min
  10. What If You Never Meet the One ft. Melyssa Ford

    4 MARS

    What If You Never Meet the One ft. Melyssa Ford

    Get $200 off your Tonal purchase! Get a complete gym + a trainer in your home by going to http://tonal.com then use promo code LOVERS for that big discount.—In this episode of Lovers, Melyssa Ford joins me for a conversation about desirability, partnership, and what it means to build a full life without centering it around finding “the one.” Melyssa has been publicly desired for decades. She’s dated wealthy men, high-profile men, and men who could provide an extraordinary lifestyle. And yet, she’s never been married and doesn’t have children. In this conversation, she reflects on what that actually means, not from a place of regret, but from a place of honesty. What happens when you are wanted by many but not chosen in the way you hoped? What if partnership never materializes the way you imagined it would? We also discuss something I call Bething, the tension between becoming the person you are meant to be and chasing the life you thought you were supposed to have. Bething is about allowing yourself to exist fully in the present version of your life, even if it doesn’t match the cultural script you were handed. It’s the practice of building something meaningful instead of waiting for someone to complete it. This episode is not about giving up on love. It’s about living well whether love arrives in the way you expected or not. It’s about separating desirability from devotion, lifestyle from longevity, and fantasy from fulfillment. If you’ve ever quietly wondered what happens if you never meet your person, this conversation is for you. Follow Melyssa Ford → Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/melyssaford→ Watch Hot & Bothered with Melyssa Ford (YouTube): https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCgI18pIo71rZWq6upn_QxMgListen to Hot & Bothered Podcast: available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts & all major platforms→ Get her book Allow Me to Reintroduce Myself: 13 Lessons for a Life Well Lived: https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/58631608-allow-me-to-reintroduce-myself?from_search=true&from_srp=true&qid=n6x35X4UoC&rank=1Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes  If you haven’t subscribed to Lemonada Premium yet, now’s the perfect time → lemonadapremium.com  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    1 h 28 min
  11. I Thought I Wanted to Be a Trad Wife… I Was Wrong ft. Lisa Bilyeu

    1 AVR.

    I Thought I Wanted to Be a Trad Wife… I Was Wrong ft. Lisa Bilyeu

    Thanks to Cozy Earth for sponsoring this episode. Go to cozyearth.com/LOVERS for up to 20% off!  Sex Is a Skill. Beducated is where you learn it. Join the world's largest sex school and access 150+ courses for curious adults: https://beducate.me/lovers.  — In this episode of Lovers, I sit down with Lisa Bilyeu to talk about a decision a lot of women think about… but don’t always say out loud: what if you don’t want kids? Lisa is an entrepreneur, co-founder of Quest Nutrition, and founder of Impact Theory Studios. She’s known for building billion-dollar businesses alongside her husband while also speaking openly about identity, marriage, and what it means to choose a life that actually fits you. Lisa built a life that looked like the dream. Marriage, stability, and the role she thought she was supposed to want. For a long time, she even stepped into the idea of being a traditional wife. But over time, something didn’t sit right. What happens when you realize the life you chose doesn’t actually fit you anymore? We talk about what it looked like for Lisa to tell her husband that she didn’t want children, how they navigated being in a marriage where one partner wants kids and the other doesn’t, and why choosing to be child-free doesn’t mean something is missing, broken, or selfish. This conversation challenges the idea that every woman is meant to become a mother, and unpacks the pressure many women feel around motherhood, marriage, and identity. We also explore what it means to redefine a successful relationship on your own terms, whether that includes children or not. If you’ve ever questioned whether motherhood is for you, wondered how to tell your partner you don’t want kids, or felt conflicted about choosing career, independence, or a different kind of life, this episode is for you. EXCLUSIVE LOVERS COMMUNITY RESOURCENeed help starting a difficult conversation? Access our guided journal inside the LOVERS community: → https://www.loversbyshan.com/resource/navigating-change-hard-conversations-in-relationships-community-exclusive  Follow Lisa Bilyeu → Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisabilyeu/→ Watch & learn on Impact Theory: https://impacttheory.com/→ Explore her personal website: https://lisabilyeu.com/→ Listen to her podcast Women of Impact: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/women-of-impact/id1435217865→ Get her book Radical Confidence: https://radicalconfidence.com/  Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes    See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    1 h 17 min
  12. What Men Actually Think About Before They Propose ft. Mark Manson

    18 MARS

    What Men Actually Think About Before They Propose ft. Mark Manson

    Have you taken my MasterClass yet? New subscribers get access to my class and hundreds of others starting at $10 per month. Right now, our listeners get an additional 15% off any MasterClass annual membership at http://masterclass.com/lovers  ________________________ In this episode of Lovers, I’m joined by Mark Manson, the bestselling author of The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, Everything Is F*cked: A Book About Hope, and Models: Attract Women Through Honesty, to talk about what men actually think about before they propose, and why waiting doesn’t mean what you think it means.Mark shares the story of how he “agonized” over proposing to his now wife of ten years. Despite being deeply in love, he struggled with doubt, timing, and the pressure to feel completely certain. The turning point came during a conversation with his stepmother, who told him she had been married for over thirty years and still couldn’t say with absolute certainty that she “knew” he was the one. That advice freed him from the illusion that certainty is required before commitment.We also unpack my own proposal story with Jared, including the untold truth about the pressure I put on him to propose and what was actually happening behind the scenes. The story I shared online isn’t the full story, and in this episode, we fill in the missing pieces.Lauren Morrison, my sister and the author of Be in the Room, joins as guest host. As a longtime fan of Mark Manson, she helps us dig into the myth of the two-year rule, the idea that if a man hasn’t proposed by a certain timeline, you must not be “the one,” and the false belief that real love comes with instant certainty.This conversation challenges the cultural narrative that a proposal delay reflects doubt about your worth. Instead, it reveals how doubt is often part of the process, not a sign that something is wrong.If you’ve ever wondered what’s taking so long, this episode is for you. Get MasterClass Today For real, what are you waiting for? My class on MasterClass is one of the best things I’ve ever done and I’m sure every other instructor would agree! Go to http://masterclass.com/lovers Get an additional 15% off any MasterClass annual membership  Follow Mark Manson → Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/markmanson/→ Listen to Mark’s podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/solved-with-mark-manson/id1247526593→ Sign up for Purpose and experience Love Maps: https://purpose.app/ Follow Lauren Morrison → Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/coachlaurenmorrison/→ Get Lauren’s new book https://www.amazon.com/Be-Room-Shrinking-Leading-Purpose/dp/B0FM4HGYSP→ Sign up for a free coaching consultation with Lauren https://www.beintheroomcoaching.com/work-with-laurenWant more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    1 h 16 min
  13. Spinning the Block Doesn’t Work Without This ft. Jerrie Johnson and Dria Brown

    18 FÉVR.

    Spinning the Block Doesn’t Work Without This ft. Jerrie Johnson and Dria Brown

    Have you taken my MasterClass yet? New subscribers get access to my class and hundreds of others starting at $10 per month. Right now, our listeners get an additional 15% off any MasterClass annual membership at masterclass.com/lovers.________________________ In this episode of Lovers, Jerrie Johnson (NAACP-nominated actor best known for role on Harlem) and Dria Brown (the creative doula) share the story of how they fell hard, broke up, and then made a conscious decision to rebuild their relationship differently the second time. The first time around, their connection was intense, passionate, and undeniable. But intensity alone wasn’t enough. Before getting back together, they chose to start over as friends, and in doing so, they realized something uncomfortable: they weren’t actually as strong of friends the first time as they thought. This conversation explores what it truly means to be friends with your romantic partner, why passion can mask incompatibility, and why many couples confuse chemistry for foundation. If you’ve ever considered getting back together with an ex, or if you believe you’re “best friends” with your partner, this episode will challenge you to define what that actually means. Because sometimes spinning the block only works when something fundamental changes. Are you and your lover really friends? Try this relationship check in to find outhttps://www.loversbyshan.com/resource/relationship-checkinNAACP - Vote for Jerrie's nominationhttps://vote.naacpimageawards.net/categories/8f53f295-6f7a-42f1-a40f-08de2c5a3e90/entrants Follow Jerrie JohnsonInstagram → https://www.instagram.com/jerriejohnson/ TikTok → https://www.tiktok.com/@jerriejohnsonOfficial Website → https://www.jerriejohnson.comSubstack → JerrieJohnson.substack.com Follow Dria BrownInstagram → https://www.instagram.com/driabrown/Official Website → https://www.thecreativedoulastudio.com/  Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes  If you haven’t subscribed to Lemonada Premium yet, now’s the perfect time → lemonadapremium.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    1 h 8 min
  14. Are You Nicer to Strangers Than Your Partner ft. DeWanda Wise

    11 MARS

    Are You Nicer to Strangers Than Your Partner ft. DeWanda Wise

    Thank you to Evvy for sponsoring today’s video! Go to https://evvy.yt.link/v90OvPp and use code LOVERSBYSHAN10 to get 10% off your first purchase (up to $25). ________________________ In this episode of Lovers, I sit down with actor DeWanda Wise to talk about what makes her marriage to actor Alano Miller genuinely healthy, not perfect, not performative, but well-matched. DeWanda and Alano have been married since 2009 after dating for only three months. Now more than 15 years in, they frequently appear together at industry events and continue to build a partnership rooted in intentionality rather than assumption. Alano Miller, known for his roles in Underground and Jane the Virgin, shares a dynamic with DeWanda that is grounded in accountability and mutual respect. One of the most impactful amendments in their marriage came from Christian counseling: don’t treat strangers better than you treat me. They hold each other accountable to extend the same kindness, patience, and curiosity at home that they offer the outside world. When one of them falls short, the response is not immediate condemnation but curiosity and course correction. We explore the delicate balance between accepting your partner and enabling harmful patterns, and what it truly means to be well-suited to love someone as they are. DeWanda challenges the idea that being “too much” is always a flaw, suggesting instead that compatibility determines whether intensity feels overwhelming or perfectly matched. We also draw parallels to parenting, where the tension between letting someone be themselves and shaping them into who we think they should become is ever-present. This conversation ultimately centers on discernment, kindness, and the courage to build a relationship where both partners feel deeply seen and responsibly loved. This episode also features a clip of my upcoming interview with legendary relationship therapists John and Julie Gottman! You can preview this episode inside the LOVERS community only Thanks to our sponsor of this episode Evvy Find out what’s happening with your vaginal health so you can build a care guide based on knowledge vs guess work!Go to https://evvy.yt.link/v90OvPp use code LOVERSBYSHAN10 for 10% off your first purchase (up to $25). Follow DeWanda Wise  → Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/dewandawise/→ Keep up with her movies and TV appearances: https://www.imdb.com/name/nm1986622/Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    56 min
  15. Can Intimacy Survive Porn, Drinks and Phone Addictions? ft. Dr Anna Lembke

    25 FÉVR.

    Can Intimacy Survive Porn, Drinks and Phone Addictions? ft. Dr Anna Lembke

    Thanks to Cozy Earth for sponsoring this video. Go to cozyearth.com/LOVERS for up to 20% off!—-----------------------  In this episode of Lovers, I share something personal: the ways my own social media habit began affecting my presence, my focus, and ultimately my intimacy. Jared joins the conversation to reflect on the intervention he had with me when he realized my relationship with my phone wasn’t just a habit, it was beginning to shape our connection. Then we’re joined by psychiatrist and Dopamine Nation author Dr. Anna Lembke, who explains why addiction today looks different than it did even a generation ago. We live in a world where high-dopamine substances and behaviors, from alcohol and porn to social media, smut, gaming, and endless scrolling, are instantly accessible and socially normalized. Dr. Lembke breaks down how these habits rewire the brain’s reward system, dull pleasure, increase craving, and quietly erode intimacy. We talk about porn addiction, phone addiction, alcoholism, erotic content consumption, and the broader crisis of overconsumption that defines modern life. Most importantly, Dr. Lembke offers practical tools, many of which she teaches in her class on MasterClass and outlines in Dopamine Nation, to help us reset our dopamine systems and reclaim our relationships. This isn’t just an episode about addiction. It’s about presence, connection, and what it takes to love well in the most addictive era in human history. To Watch Dopamine on MasterClass go to http://masterclass.com/lovers (this link will get you 15% off an annual plan to watch over 200 classes there including mine)Follow Dr. Anna Lembke Dr. Anna Lembke is a Stanford psychiatrist and New York Times bestselling author specializing in addiction, dopamine science, and behavioral health. Official Website → https://www.annalembke.com Bestselling Book → Dopamine Nation: Finding Balance in the Age of Indulgence https://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/?ean=9781524746728  Stanford Profile → https://med.stanford.edu/profiles/Anna_Lembke Watch her class on MasterClass → http://masterclass.com/lovers  Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes  If you haven’t subscribed to Lemonada Premium yet, now’s the perfect time → lemonadapremium.com See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    59 min
  16. Do We Believe Her Now? | Abby De La Rosa Returns to Discuss Her Alternative Relationship

    11 FÉVR.

    Do We Believe Her Now? | Abby De La Rosa Returns to Discuss Her Alternative Relationship

    In this episode of Lovers, Abby De La Rosa returns three years after our first conversation to reflect on what time, motherhood, and public scrutiny have actually taught her. When Abby first joined the show, she was pregnant and navigating intense speculation about her relationship with Nick Cannon, who now has 12 children with multiple partners. That episode sparked massive conversation and debate about alternative relationship structures, belief, and who society decides to trust. Now, years later, Abby comes back with clarity, boundaries, and lived experience. In this follow-up conversation, Abby opens up about what it’s been like raising children within a highly publicized family dynamic, how her understanding of love and partnership has evolved, and why she remains grounded in her choices despite ongoing judgment. She addresses the assumptions people make about women in nontraditional relationships, what outsiders often get wrong about consent and agency, and how motherhood reshaped her sense of self. This episode isn’t about defending a headline or convincing anyone of a particular relationship model. It’s about autonomy, growth, and what happens when a woman is given time to live inside the decisions she once had to justify. If you’ve ever wondered what comes after the internet forms an opinion, this conversation answers that. Right now, Tonal is offering our listeners $200 off your Tonal purchase. Just go to tonal.com and use promo code LOVERS. — Thank you to Evvy for sponsoring today’s episode! Check out Evvy here: https://evvy.yt.link/SVTTsvO and use code LOVERSBYSHAN10 for 10% off your first purchase (up to $25). See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    1 h 18 min
  17. The Real Reason We Started an Open Relationship

    21 JANV.

    The Real Reason We Started an Open Relationship

    In this episode of Lovers, I’m joined by my husband Jared Brady to tell the story of the exact day we decided to call our relationship an open relationship. Want to take the Relationship Style quiz I mentioned in the episode? Click HEREhttps://www.loversbyshan.com/quizzes In this episode, Shan Boodram and Jared Brady share intimate details from the early days of their relationship that led to them choosing to label their love as an open relationship. If your first reaction to “open relationship” is “so… cheating?” you’re not alone, and this conversation is also for you. Cheating isn’t about a specific behavior, it’s about breaking the rules of the relationship you agreed to play by, which is why it’s important to clearly define YOUR rules together.  This episode explores why people seek structured relationships even without exclusivity, what commitment actually looks like when it isn’t defined by romantic restriction, and how accountability, emotional safety, partnership, and love can exist outside traditional scripts. This isn’t an episode about convincing anyone to open their relationship. It’s about clarity, consent, and understanding why the rules matter more than the label. MasterClassHave you taken my MasterClass yet? New subscribers get access to my class and hundreds of others starting at $10 per month. Right now, our listeners get an additional 15% off any MasterClass annual membership at masterclass.com/lovers. Follow JaredInstagram → https://www.instagram.com/enjoyjaredbradyYouTube → https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCKVWwEy39GLNzKXXt9v46TA Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    56 min
  18. What Men Risk When They Stay Quiet ft. Kier Gaines

    4 FÉVR.

    What Men Risk When They Stay Quiet ft. Kier Gaines

    In this episode of Lovers, therapist Kier Gaines shares a personal and professional reflection on how resentment builds when men are taught to silence their emotional truth. Kier opens up about a pivotal moment in his own relationship, when he realized that his partner’s tone was hurting his feelings, and that his fear of naming it, out of concern that he would sound “effeminate” or not man enough, was quietly turning into resentment. What started as self-protection slowly became emotional distance, until he reached a breaking point where honesty felt less risky than staying silent. Together, we unpack how masculinity norms shape emotional expression, why unspoken hurt often masquerades as resentment, and how learning to articulate emotional impact can transform intimacy rather than threaten it. This conversation explores the cost of swallowing feelings, the courage it takes to speak before resentment hardens, and what becomes possible when men allow themselves to be emotionally legible in their relationships. This episode isn’t about blame or tone-policing. It’s about emotional responsibility, relational repair, and the freedom that comes from finally saying the thing you were afraid would make you sound weak.  If you wished this episode is longer and you could hear more about Kier Gaines   Is My Relationship Healthy Quizhttps://www.loversbyshan.com/resource/the-relationship-check-in  Follow Kier GainesInstagram → https://www.instagram.com/kiergaines  TikTok → https://www.tiktok.com/@kiergaines  Twitter/X → https://twitter.com/kiergaines  YouTube → https://www.youtube.com/@KierandNoemie  Official Website → https://www.kiergaines.com  Course Words That Connect → https://kier-gaines.mykajabi.com/wordsthatconnect Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    55 min
  19. Rachel Lindsay’s Shocking Discovery About Intimacy After Divorce

    28 JANV.

    Rachel Lindsay’s Shocking Discovery About Intimacy After Divorce

    In this episode of Lovers, Higher Learning host and former Bachelorette Rachel Lindsay shares the deeply personal story of what it was like to experience intimacy both sexually and emotionally for the first time after divorce. After nearly a decade of being with only one partner, that she met while being the Bachelorette, Rachel walks us through the fears, emotions, and expectations she carried into that moment, from questions of safety and vulnerability to the quiet pressure of “doing it right” after such a long chapter had closed. She reflects on what that experience taught her about trust, desire, and emotional presence, and how those lessons reshaped her understanding of intimacy moving forward. Though she isn’t with the person from that first post-divorce experience, Rachel shares why she remains grateful for what it revealed about her needs, her boundaries, and her capacity for connection. She also opens up about how those insights are influencing the relationship she’s in today, offering a grounded, honest look at what intimacy can become after loss, change, and reinvention. This conversation isn’t about sex for shock value. It’s about safety, growth, and learning how to meet yourself again after everything you thought you knew about love has shifted. ———Follow Rachel LindsayInstagram → https://www.instagram.com/therachlindsay/  YouTube → https://www.youtube.com/@HigherLearning  Podcast — Higher Learning with Van Lathan & Rachel Lindsay → https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/higher-learning-with-van-lathan-and-rachel-lindsay/id1515152489  Official Website → https://www.rachellindsayofficial.com/  Rachel’s Book — Miss Me With That: Hot Takes, Helpful Tidbits, And A Few Hard Truths → https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/57895042-miss-me-with-that?from_search=true&from_srp=true&qid=vFiuBJ3vpY&rank=1  Want more Lover?Receive the weekly Love Letter → http://loversbyshan.com/newsletterJoin the Lovers Community → https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityExplore quizzes and worksheets → http://loversbyshan.com/quizzes See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    51 min
  20. Inside the Male Fantasy: The Surprising Request Men Keep Paying For ft. The Pink Parley

    20/08/2025

    Inside the Male Fantasy: The Surprising Request Men Keep Paying For ft. The Pink Parley

    This week on Lovers, Shan sits down with The Pink Parley, a sex worker pulling back the curtain on what men secretly crave but rarely admit—even to their wives. With 98% of her clients being married men who have no desire to leave their marriages, Parley reveals the surprising request that keeps them coming back: ass worship.Yes, you read that right. These men don’t just want to “eat the groceries”—they want to be consumed by, suffocated by, and utterly surrounded by the booty. For them, it’s not just an act of pleasure; it’s a full-body, sensory experience.Together, Shan and Parley unpack what this hidden desire tells us about:- The gap between fantasy and communication in long-term relationships- The role of body positivity in sexual confidence and desire- How unspoken cravings can complicate fidelity inside marriageThis episode is provocative, eye-opening, and an important reminder that what we don’t say in the bedroom can be just as impactful as what we do.🔗 Follow The Pink ParleyWebsite: https://thepinkparley.com/Instagram: http://instagram.com/thepinkparleyWant more Lover?Checkout Shan’s AI trained to give only her advice to you http://loversbyshan.comSign up to get a free weekly Love Letter from me http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter💞 Join the Lovers Community: https://www.loversbyshan.com/communityCheckout free quizzes and worksheets designed to help you deepen your relationships http://loversbyshan.com/newsletter________________________Advertising & Other Inquiries: team@loversbyshan.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    53 min
Shan Boodram sur Apple