#23 Grit: why it matters, and what you can do to get more of it

Yay. Finally, another podcast episode. I know it’s been too long. Life got in the way. And my creative mind, of course, came up with all these new projects and business ideas that were just screaming for me to do something with them. As a good creative generalist, I had to give them some attention. It’s a bit too much at times, I won’t lie, but it’s also incredibly rewarding. Building new things, starting new ventures, helping others… it’s all play to me; I consider myself extremely lucky to be able to do what I love every day. 

But so, yes, I’m back with an episode of the “Get Unstuck” podcast. My name is Murielle Marie, and I’m your host. A serial entrepreneur, creative generalist, writer, life-long learner, and career and business coach who loves to share the golden nuggets I pick up on how to do this thing called life.

This week’s episode is inspired by my recent absence from this podcast while building new projects. There are many things you need to keep going when you’ve decided to venture out as an entrepreneur or when you’ve decided to finally pursue your dreams, whatever they may be. But one of the things you need the most, and that is currently not talked about enough, is grit. That’s why today, we're diving deep into the power of grit, the secret sauce that can make all the difference in our lives and businesses. So grab a cup of coffee, sit back, and let's embark on a journey to discover how we can cultivate more of this invaluable trait.

Ok, Grit. It's a word that resonates with strength, determination, and unwavering resolve. Google speaks of courage, resolve, and strength of character. I believe it’s what separates the dreamers from the doers, those who succeed from those who fail. In a world where instant gratification often takes center stage, the importance of grit cannot be overstated. Truly.

I want to start with a real-life scenario highlighting the importance of grit in the workplace. Recently, a friend and client in his late thirties, who owns a chain of restaurants, shared a rather compelling story with me. One of his pizza places had just hired a new employee. It was her first week, and in the middle of a busy shift, she suddenly took off her apron and left on the spot, claiming that the hectic pace of the restaurant "was not good for her."

Now, this incident might seem like just a momentary blip, but it reflects a broader issue in today's world—a lack of grit and resilience in the face of challenges. In a society where everything should be frictionless, some people may struggle to navigate demanding environments like a restaurant.

As ambitious creatives, dreamers, careerists, entrepreneurs and business owners, we must recognize the significance of grit in our employees and ourselves. Grit isn't merely about tolerating difficult situations; it's about embracing them as opportunities for growth and learning. 

But what is grit, really? It’s an invisible force. Because I’ve witnessed its power in my life and that of so many of my clients, I believe it’s what keeps us pushing forward when everything seems to be against us. It's the unyielding fire that fuels our progress and pushes us towards our goals. Yet, in today's fast-paced society, it feels like grit is slowly fading away.

We live in a world where distractions are all around us and where the allure of immediate success can be tempting. We start something with enthusiasm, only to abandon it when the going gets tough. But here's the truth: true success rarely comes overnight. It's forged through tenacity, resilience, and, yes, grit.

When I was younger, I would start many things but never finish them. Of course, some of that resulted from my generalist brain (I have some podcast episodes about generalists and the creative brain, so be sure to check them out to learn more), but there was more than that going on. I believe at the time, I didn't have the resolve or the grit that is necessary to push through challenges and see things through to completion. I would often give up when faced with setbacks or when things became too difficult. It was easy for me to lose interest and move on to the next shiny object that caught my attention.

However, as I grew older, I realized the importance of finishing what I started and its impact on achieving success and personal growth. I began to understand that the habits that would allow me to succeed included perseverance, determination, and the willingness to do the necessary work, even when I didn’t feel like it or faced obstacles. I consciously decided to develop my grit and cultivate a mindset that would help me overcome adversity.

One of the ways I started building grit was by using Mel Robbins’ 5-second rule (I’ll add a link to her book and to her amazing TEDx talk in the show notes).  When I saw Mel Robbins’ Talk in 2013, 'How to stop screwing yourself over,’ I’d just embarked on my self-development journey. In the talk, she discussed her 5-Second Rule, which blew my mind. In this habit, the rule is that if you have the instinct to act on a goal, you have to physically move within 5 seconds of thinking the thought. If you don’t act within those first 5 seconds, your brain will kill the instinct. 

The moment you feel the instinct or desire to act on a goal or commitment, and you feel yourself hesitate, count 5-4-3-2-1-GO and move towards the action.

With the 5-Second Rule, you short-circuit the trap of overthinking that many of us fall into and push your body into taking action. You don’t have to wait till you feel ready; you simply have to move. 

Mel Robbins was one of the first inspirations to change my life, stop slacking, and finally do the things I always wanted. Her 5-second rule helped me build grit, and with that, everything shifted. It made me realize that being ready isn’t a feeling; being ready is a decision. Just like working your way through life, even when things get hard or aren’t going as planned. 

Another important aspect of developing grit was learning to embrace failure and setbacks as valuable learning experiences. Rather than seeing them as reasons to give up, I began to view them as opportunities for growth and improvement. I understood that setbacks were an inevitable part of any worthwhile pursuit and that they should be seen as stepping stones to success rather than roadblocks. 

When I fail, I don’t think what I’m trying won’t work or that I will never figure it out. No, what I do is realize I just haven’t figured it out or that it’s not working YET. Approaching what I do this way helps me to muster more grit to keep going, believe me. Because failure is an integral part of success and building pretty much anything new.  

I also looked for mentors and role models who embodied the qualities of grit that I admired. Some of the role models that I keep coming back to when I need more perseverance or a little kick in the butt are people who went through terrible hardship and came out stronger, more compassionate, and with incredible resilience. 

One such example is Nelson Mandela, the anti-apartheid leader and former President of South Africa. Mandela spent 27 years in prison for his activism, enduring horrible things and injustice. There is a song about his years in captivity from the movie Invictus (amazing movie, check the show notes, but also get your tissues because you WILL need them). The song is called 9000 Days. I can’t listen to it without crying my eyes out. It’s so powerful. I’m not crying out of sadness, but more out of hope, remembering the courage that Mandela had and that I can only aspire to. When he was finally released from prison, he came out with an unbroken spirit and an unwavering commitment to peace and equality. Mandela's ability to overcome adversity, his capacity to forgive, and his dedication to the freedom of his people make me want to have more grit and perseverance.

His story serves as a reminder that thriving is often born out of tenacity and the refusal to give up in the face of adversity.

Over time, working on having more grit this way, I noticed a shift in my mindset and behavior. I became more resilient, bouncing back from failures quicker and staying committed to my goals more easily. I developed a stronger sense of self-belief, knowing that I had the ability to overcome challenges and achieve what I set out to do.

Today, grit continues to play an important role in my life. It is the driving force behind my pursuit of excellence and my willingness to step outside of my comfort zone. I understand that true success is something that I make, but not without the determination to keep going - no matter what crosses my path. It’s also the reason why this episode exists, because even if I cannot keep the tight schedule I gave myself when I started my podcast (hello high achieving perfectionist!) I'm not giving up on it. Instead, I’m using grit to move forward with EVERYTHING I’m doing.

But my story is not unique. Over the years, as a career and business coach, I've witnessed countless individuals face similar challenges. And the ones who succeed are the ones who harness the power of grit. 

So how can we cultivate more grit in our own lives? Here are five tried-and-tested tips, so get ready to elevate your grit game big time!

Tip #1: The "Gritty Bucket" 

Find having a jar, a bucket, an envelope, or any sort of container dedicated to your grit. Whenever something isn’t going like you want it to go, when there’s a setback, or you start doubting yourself (like I do on a daily basis!), take a symbolic token, a small stone or a pebble, a feather, a little paper ball made out of a post it, whatever, and put it in your "gritty bucket." to remind yourself to not