Most of us chase home on the outside — new careers, new cities, new missions — assuming the right setting will unlock the right identity. But for Socratese, home wasn’t Boston, the Army, or the next achievement. It was the inner place he had been trained to outrun. In this episode, we unpack why so many high-performers hit professional milestones but feel spiritually homeless, how “hero’s journey” conditioning pushes leaders away from their real identity, and how cannabis (used intentionally, not performatively) became the unexpected doorway to presence, empathy, and actual healing. We trace the emotional reality of reintegration after elite institutions (military, corporate, startup), how performance culture replaces personhood, and why coming home is always an inward path — never a geographic one. This conversation winds through 80s action movies, the “meeting crisis,” late-stage capitalism narratives, business ethics, the collapse of real community, and the quiet courage required to stop living other people’s scripts. No mysticism. No clichés. Just a brutally honest exploration of what it actually takes to return to yourself. TL;DR * Home isn’t a location—it’s your inner alignment. Many leaders hit external success while feeling internally displaced. * Cannabis as a tool, not an identity. For Socratese, it created non-judgmental presence—the state needed for real healing. * Performance culture steals personhood. Whether military or corporate, the identity costumes eventually crack. * Disruption isn’t tech—it’s restoring human reciprocity. Real business is two people making each other better. * The journey inward is the only real journey. Every choice either takes you closer to your true self or further away. Memorable Lines * “I came home from the Army, but I didn’t feel at home. Because the home I needed wasn’t a place—it was my heart.” * “Cannabis didn’t heal me. It put me in a state where healing was finally possible.” * “We spend years becoming the person others expect, and then wonder why we feel like strangers in our own lives.” * “Business should be: I win, you win. Somewhere along the line, we lost the human part.” * “You don’t find home. You return to it.” Guest Socratese Rosenfeld — Army veteran, tech founder, CEO of Jane, and one of the most thoughtful voices on identity, healing, and conscious leadership.LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/socratesrosenfeld/Website: https://www.iheartjane.com/ Why This Matters If you’re a founder, veteran, executive, or anyone who has lived inside a high-performance machine, you know the cost: identity confusion, emotional detachment, and a quiet sense of exile from yourself. Coming back home is the real work.Not a tactic. Not a hack.A reckoning. The leaders of tomorrow aren’t the loudest.They’re the ones who know where “home” is — and how to lead from that grounded center.Call to Action If this conversation lit something up for you, don’t just let it fade. Come join me inside the Second Life Leader community on Skool. That’s where I share the frameworks, field reports, and real stories of reinvention that don’t make it into the podcast. You’ll connect with other professionals who are actively rebuilding and leading with clarity. The link is in the show notes—step inside and start building your Second Life today. https://secondlifeleader.com This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit www.dougutberg.com
