50 First Dates with Chris HVMMINGBYRD

HVMMINGBYRD
  • 5.0 (2)
  • Mental Health

🎙 50 First Dates with Chris HVMMINGBYRD I was a lifestyle and wedding photographer—then brain surgery changed everything. Now, with aphasia, prosopagnosia and memory loss, every day feels like a first date. This podcast is a space for healing, humor, and heart. I’ll share my recovery journey and invite others to tell their stories too. We’re building a community of love, laughter, and second chances—one first date at a time.

Episodes

  1. 2d ago

    The Healing Power of Dance

    Dance, Joy & Healing: Reclaiming My Body After Brain I’ve been thinking a lot about pain, vulnerability, and joy. There was a time during my recovery when I was so focused on getting to the next step that I didn’t realize I was rushing myself through the process. I wanted to move forward. I wanted to feel better. I wanted to be ready. And then one day, I felt joy. I was at the ranch watching the sunset, surrounded by my dog, my friend’s dog, and the people around me. I felt something I had been trying to find for so long — that feeling of being connected to life and nature again. In this episode of 50 First Dates with Chris HVMMINGBYRD, I bring Leanne back into the conversation as we talk about dance, community, neuroscience, neurodivergence, spirituality, and learning how to experience joy again. Leanne knew me before my neurological event, so I wanted to ask her: What changed? Before, I was much harder on myself. I had expectations that I should be able to walk into a dance class and be performance-ready within an hour. But my brain wasn't equipped for that anymore. Now I'm learning how I learn. Instead of trying to master everything in one class, I can focus on one technique, explore it, and build from there. That has changed the way I experience dance. Dance has become more than movement to me. It has become connection. Music. Laughter. Spirituality. Community. It has become a way of exploring my body and reminding myself that I am still here. I think about how naturally children dance. They don't worry about whether they're good enough. They don't wonder if they're embarrassing themselves. They take up space without apologizing for it. Then somewhere along the way, many of us lose that freedom. Adults start thinking: “I'm not a dancer.” “I'm going to look stupid.” “What if people judge me?” Even teenagers can become aware of whether something is “cool” or embarrassing. So when did we stop letting ourselves move? I also think about neurodivergence and how important it can be to have an option not to perform. Sometimes I don't need to be watched. Sometimes I don't need to be perfect. Sometimes I just need to move. There is something powerful about putting on a record and letting your body respond to the music without asking it to prove anything. I've also become fascinated by the neuroscience behind movement — how dance can engage different areas and functions of the brain, and how movement can be incorporated into rehabilitation and approaches such as mirror therapy. After my own brain injury, I look at dance differently. I don't just see choreography anymore. I see possibility. I see another language. I see connection. I see a way of learning. And maybe most importantly, I see a way of reminding myself that imperfection doesn't mean I have failed. The way each person moves is unique. That uniqueness is what makes dance beautiful. So this episode is also a little invitation — especially to my fellow brain injury survivors: Please learn to dance. You don't have to perform. You don't have to be good. You don't even have to know what you're doing. Put on a record. Let your body move. Show your body that you care enough to feel the music. Feel it in your heart. Move your soul.

  2. Aug 1

    Rebuilding Our Hearts After Brain Injury | Chapter 2

    What happens when a brain injury changes not just one person—but an entire relationship? In Chapter 2 of our relationship series, my boyfriend and I return to one of our favorite sanctuaries in the mountains to continue an honest conversation about what it means to rebuild a relationship after stroke, brain surgery, and neurological trauma. Recovery isn't only about walking again or finding words again. It's also about learning how to love each other through uncertainty, grief, healing, laughter, patience, and becoming completely new versions of ourselves. Together we explore: What it's like for a partner to witness someone survive a stroke and brain injury.How research, education, and curiosity became the boat that carried me through recovery.Why caregivers experience their own invisible form of trauma.Learning to date each other again after brain injury.How our identities, routines, conversations, and relationship transformed.The importance of checking in before difficult conversations.Reading the room and asking, "Can we talk?"Emotional regulation after neurological injury.Why self-care isn't selfish—it's necessary for both partners.Small gestures that carried enormous meaning, like holding a hand during difficult moments.Why healing requires allowing ourselves to feel grief instead of forcing happiness.The power of patience, compassion, and rediscovering each other.How every brain injury is different and why every recovery deserves to be honored.We also talk openly about recognizing the warning signs of stroke, including my own experience in the days leading up to mine: Severe headachesVision changesSlurred speechExcessive yawningFeeling unusually disorientedKnowing the signs can save a life. If we could sit beside another couple beginning this journey, this is the conversation we'd want to have. Not because we have every answer, but because wisdom becomes more powerful when it's shared. Our hope is that this episode reminds survivors, caregivers, partners, and families that healing isn't about becoming who you were before. Sometimes it's about meeting someone entirely new—including yourself. This episode is for: Stroke survivorsBrain injury survivors (TBI & ABI)Aphasia survivorsCaregiversPartners and spousesFamilies navigating neurological recoveryMental health advocatesHealthcare professionalsAnyone rebuilding after life-changing traumaTogether, we're creating a family of wisdom—one conversation at a time. brighter days are coming LINKS: ⁠https://biausa.org/find-bia/california⁠

  3. Jul 18

    Tips & Tricks with Chris: The Chisme, The Goshippu & The Brain Injury Glow-Up

    Tips & Tricks with Chris: The Chisme, The Goshipu & The Brain Injury Glow-Up Welcome to a new series of 50 First Reflections; Chris's Diary where we talk about the real stuff: the hard moments, the funny moments, and all the lessons hiding in between. Today's chisme (or as they say in Japanese, goshippu 👀) starts with a brain injury support group and a lesson I never expected to learn. After my stroke and brain surgery, I joined survivor groups hoping to find connection, inspiration, and maybe a few answers. I loved having a space to share struggles—but I also noticed something missing. We only have so much time together. Two hours can’t only be about what hurts. Recovery needs room for the hard days and the victories, the setbacks and the solutions. So when I had the chance to help lead a meeting, I thought: "Okay Chris, let's see what happens." And something amazing happened. The conversation changed. People shared tips. People encouraged each other. Everyone had a chance to speak. For two hours, we weren't just talking about being injured. We were talking about being human. There was laughter. There was connection. There was purpose. Then came the plot twist... the chisme. When I shared ideas for creating more structure and support, my suggestions weren't welcomed. It hurt. I felt dismissed and disappointed. But here is the lesson: I am not a victim of my story. I am the author of it. I needed help, and now I understand something important: sometimes the person you're waiting for to create change is you. In this episode, I share my favorite recovery tips and tricks: Reading out loud to help rebuild communication.Using Duolingo as a fun way to challenge my brain.Taking breaks from social media and comparison.Creating my own "HVMMINGBYRD Board Meeting" (my personal 24/7 therapist check-in).Finding ways to protect mental health while navigating a very weird world after neurological injury.Recovery is messy. Recovery is emotional. Recovery is also full of unexpected laughs, lessons, and moments where you realize: "Wait... I actually know more than I thought." So grab your coffee, your journal, or your favorite snack because this is the kind of chisme we actually need. The good, the bad, the awkward, and everything in between. brighter days are coming SEO Keywords: stroke survivor, brain injury recovery, aphasia recovery, neuro rehabilitation, stroke podcast, brain surgery recovery, support groups, resilience, healing, mental health, Duolingo, reading aloud, self-advocacy, HVMMINGBYRD, recovery journey, hope after stroke.

  4. Jul 6

    The 70/30 mindset.

    There was a time when my life felt like a live-action nightmare. For a while, I believed recovery meant forcing myself to stay positive. I tried living at 50/50—half sadness, half happiness—telling myself everything would be okay. But if I'm honest, that version of hope felt forced. Today, I see recovery differently. I live by what I call the 70/30 mindset. Seventy percent is choosing gratitude, possibility, and moving forward.Thirty percent is honoring reality—recognizing pain, grief, disability, uncertainty, and everything that deserves to be felt. Because some things are worth crying about. The goal isn't pretending life is beautiful all the time. The goal is refusing to stay trapped in the hardest chapters forever. In this episode, I share how I learned to recognize both realities while rebuilding my life after brain surgery. I talk about the "glimmers" that slowly replaced survival mode, why I now call my disabilities my superpowers, and how learning to adapt taught me how to fly again. I also reflect on stepping into rooms filled with neuroscientists and medical professionals, giving presentations that once felt impossible, and discovering that asking questions became one of my greatest strengths—not my weakness. Recovery transformed me from an artist and photographer into a peer counselor, with a future devoted to neuroscience and building a stronger bridge between patients, survivors, families, and healthcare professionals. As I celebrate another birthday, I'm reminded that birthdays mean something different after you've worn a hospital gown. Sometimes celebration isn't luxury—it can be taking a walk, trying something new, helping another person, or just waking up grateful for another chance. If my recovery can make someone else's journey even 10% easier, then every difficult step has carried purpose. Thank you for walking this path with me, HVMMINGBYRDs. Your belief in this journey continues to remind me that brighter days are possible, even after the darkest seasons. RESOURCES: NAMI National Warmline Directory:NAMI Warmline Directory Website:988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline In this episode we explore:​ The 70/30 mindset for healing and resilience• Why toxic positivity never worked for me• Honoring grief without staying stuck• Finding "glimmers" after trauma• Turning disabilities into strengths• Brain injury recovery and identity• Becoming a peer counselor• My growing passion for neuroscience• Learning to speak with confidence• Celebrating life after surviving the unimaginableIf this episode resonates with you, consider following the podcast and sharing it with someone navigating recovery, brain injury, stroke, trauma, disability, or their own journey of becoming.

  5. Jun 1

    Learning How to Fly

    Last year I couldn't speak. After brain surgery, aphasia, and a long recovery journey, I found myself learning how to communicate all over again. In this episode I explore what happens when illness or injury forces us to become students of our own bodies. From learning about the brain and nervous system to understanding stress, advocacy, healing, and resilience, this reflection dives into the lessons that can only be learned through lived experience. Sharing thoughts on recovery, the Rat Park study, why environment matters, how stress impacts healing, and the communication tools that helped him find his voice again. Most importantly, this episode is a reminder that our hardest experiences can become opportunities to help others. Because sometimes the greatest education doesn't come from a classroom. It comes from surviving something you never thought you'd survive. LINKS: https://aphasia.org/?utm_source=chatgpt.com https://www.stroke.org/en/about-stroke/effects-of-stroke/communication-and-aphasia/stroke-and-aphasia https://www.samhsa.gov/substance-use/recovery?utm_source=chatgpt.com #50FirstDateswithChrisHVMMINGBYRD#ChrissDiary#BrainInjuryRecovery#AphasiaAwareness#StrokeRecovery#NeuroRecovery#PatientAdvocacy#DisabilityAwareness#HealingJourney#MentalHealthAwareness#TraumaRecovery#Neuroplasticity#ChronicIllness#Resilience#PersonalGrowth#Storytelling#RecoveryPodcast#BrainHealth#InvisibleDisability#HVMMINGBYRD

  6. May 3

    I Can’t Change the World, But I Can Try — So This Is Me Trying

    Hi, it’s Christopher…and this space… it’s not about perfection—it’s about truth, lived experience, and the courage to speak when your voice has had to be rebuilt. Today, I had the pleasure of sitting down once again with my great friend, Victoria Charles—an incredible social worker whose insight, compassion, and lived experience bring so much depth to this conversation. Together, we dive into something heavy… but necessary. We’re talking about vicarious trauma—the kind that doesn’t always belong to you at first…but finds a way to live in your body anyway. The kind social workers carry.Medical providers absorb.First responders witness.And even the kind we meet just by being human… in a world that doesn’t pause.It’s like secondhand smoke—you didn’t light it… but you’re still breathing it in. We explore how burnout isn’t just exhaustion—it’s information.A signal.A moment asking professionals to pause, to seek support, to relearn care… for others and for themselves. Because no one is meant to do this alone. What does it mean to actually work as a team?To consult before acting?To ask questions without fear?To ask for training before chaos arrives?There is no such thing as a dumb question…especially when someone’s life is part of the answer. I share why I chose peer counseling—because I lived the gaps. I lived the silence.I lived the “broken telephone” of care. There was a time I was nonverbal…and my sister had to become my voice.My advocate.My bridge to the world. And I still think about that—what happens to the ones who don’t have that? I remember feeling like…an animal in a zoo. FedSleptMoved through routinesRepeated days without understandingAlive… but not included. So this is also a call—to professionals: Keep people alive, yes.But don’t forget to see them.To listen to them.To teach them how to advocate for themselves again. Because survival without understanding…can feel like another kind of loss. We also step into the realities of discrimination—especially within the LGBTQ+ community in healthcare. The extra questionsThe assumptionsThe quiet biasThe loud harmAnd how even that becomes another layer of trauma—not just personal, but systemic. We talk about what meaningful support actually looks like: Not performanceNot checking boxesBut consistencyPresenceCare that doesn’t disappear after dischargeBecause the truth is…the hospital can feel like a stage.Everyone shows up when it’s urgent. But when the patient leaves?That’s when things can get heavier.Lonelier.More complex. And that’s where support should continue—not fade. This episode is layered.It’s honest.It’s uncomfortable in the ways that matter. And it’s rooted in one belief: We may not be able to change everything…but we can change how we show up. So this—this conversation,this reflection,this voice— This is me trying. brighter days are coming RESOURCES: *National Domestic Violence Hotline (1800-799-7233) *San Diego Family Justice Center (619-533-6000) *North County Family Justice Center (760-290-3690) *Mandated Reporters (1800-344-6000) *Child Protective Services (CPS)(1858-560-2191) *Adult Protective Services (APS) (1800-339-4661) **sandiegocounty.gov https://www.stroke.org/en/stroke-groups/stroke--brain-injury-group?utm_source=perplexity https://biausa.org/public-affairs/media/virtual-support-groups?utm_source=perplexity Themes: #ThisIsMeTrying#VicariousTrauma#BurnoutRecovery#HealthcareVoices#SocialWorkMatters#PeerSupport#BrainInjuryAwareness#TBIRecovery#PatientAdvocacy#ListenToPatients#HealthcareReform#InvisibleRecovery#SurvivorVoice#WarriorMindset#HealingOutLoud#LGBTQHealthcare#EquityInHealthcare#TraumaInformedCare#MentalHealthAwareness#ChronicIllnessJourney#DisabilityAdvocacy#HumanCenteredCare#BeyondSurvival#ConsistencyInCare#AfterTheHospital#CommunityHealing#SpeakWithPurpose#PodcastVoices#StoryAsMedicine#HVMMINGBYRD

  7. Apr 6

    Hopeful Realism.

    This episode is called Hopeful Realism. There was a chapter of my life where everything turned upside down…and somehow, I was still expected to move like nothing happened. People would say, “he’s so lucky,”but they didn’t see the silence I was holding…the confusion, the fear… the moments where my own mind didn’t feel like mine. I was showing up to weddings, to photoshoots—while my brain was fighting something I didn’t even understand yet. A brain abscess.A stroke.Aphasia.Prosopagnosia—face blindness. I remember asking myself…why does everyone look like strangers?Why do I feel like a stranger to myself? The world kept spinning…but I felt completely still. This episode is me putting those pieces together—honoring the version of me who survived it…and finding hope inside something that once felt impossible to understand. Resources/ Books The Brain That Changes Itself: Stories of Personal Triumph from the Frontiers of Brain Science-Norman Doidge M.D.  Don't Believe Everything You Think-Joseph Nguyen The Brain's Way of Healing: Remarkable Discoveries and Recoveries from the Frontiers of Neuroplasticity-orman Doidge M.D. My Stroke of Insight: A Brain Scientist's Personal Journey-Jill Bolte Taylor  Hopeful Realism: Surviving Aphasia, Stroke & Face BlindnessHopeful Realism | Brain Injury, Identity Loss & HealingHopeful Realism: When the World Feels Unfamiliar After StrokeHopeful Realism: My Story with Aphasia & Prosopagnosia#HopefulRealism#BrainInjuryRecovery#AphasiaAwareness#Prosopagnosia#FaceBlindness#StrokeSurvivor#BrainHealth#NeuroRecovery#InvisibleIllness#MentalHealthAwareness#HealingJourney#SurvivorStory#DisabilityAwareness#NeurodivergentVoices#PodcastLife#StorytellingPodcast#RecoveryJourney#ChronicIllness#MindBodyConnection#Resilience

  8. Mar 16

    Empathy You Can’t Learn in a Textbook

    In this conversation with Victoria an amazing social worker, we speak about the kind of empathy you cannot learn from a textbook. You learn it by living through something that rearranges your entire life. After surviving a stroke and brain surgery, I found myself standing in shoes I never imagined wearing. Suddenly I understood the quiet moments inside hospital rooms, the vulnerability of patients, the strength of caregivers, and the emotional weight carried by those who support healing every day. In this episode we explore: • what empathy truly feels like when you become the patient• the process of unlearning your old self so you can relearn life again• the ego — and how it convinces us we are right instead of inviting us to understand others• why stroke survivors and peer counseling can change recovery in powerful ways• meeting patients exactly where they are in their journey• why every recovery story deserves its own pace and space We also talk about something many people overlook: boundaries. Empathy is powerful, but it cannot become your entire identity. Sometimes healing means stepping indoors, resting, limiting contact, and communicating clearly with the people who support you. Recovery also taught me something unexpected. A stroke forced me to build emotional muscles I never knew I had. In many ways I feel older, wiser, humbled by life — like someone who has lived seventy years of lessons in a shorter amount of time. This conversation is about lived experience, compassion, and honoring the journey of every survivor, caregiver, and healer walking their own path. And sometimes, when life feels beautiful again, remembering to make a wish when the moment arrives — when a blue jay flies by, when a butterfly appears, or when a HVMMINGBYRD crosses your path. Because those moments remind us we are still here. stroke recovery journeystroke survivor storybrain surgery recoveryempathy in healthcaresocial worker empathystroke survivor mental healthpeer counseling stroke survivorspatient centered carecaregiver empathy and boundarieshealing after strokeliving with disability storytrauma recovery and resilience #StrokeSurvivor#BrainSurgeryRecovery#EmpathyInHealthcare#PatientCenteredCare#StrokeRecovery#HealingJourney#DisabilityAdvocacy#CaregiverSupport#NeuroRecovery #Socialworker

  9. 10/12/2025

    Rebuilding Our Hearts After Brain Surgery

    This week’s episode is a little different — it’s raw, it’s tender, it’s love after survival. 🐦‍🔥I sit down with my partner to talk about what it means to rebuild a life together after brain surgery.we dive into: ​how our love story evolved through trauma and healing​the unseen emotional work behind recovery​advice for partners supporting someone through brain surgery or PTSD​finding beauty again after everything breaksthis conversation is for the survivors, the caregivers, the dreamers — anyone who’s ever had to rebuild love from the ashes.we talk about boundaries, forgiveness, and learning how to hold each other through the storm and into the sunrise. press play if you’ve ever wanted to believe in brighter days again. *Not a paid advertisement https://a.co/d/8M5NAUA

  10. 09/01/2025

    ✨ Welcome to 50 First Dates with Chris HVMMINGBYRD – A Journey Through Love, Healing & New Beginnings

    Step into the very first moments of 50 First Dates with Chris HVMMINGBYRD, a podcast that blends love, resilience, and rediscovery. After surviving brain surgery and living with aphasia, Chris shares what it means to embrace life like every encounter is a first date — full of gratitude, curiosity, and hope. Expect flirty conversations, poetic reflections, and inspiring stories that will remind you: brighter days are coming.

  • 10 Episodes

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🎙 50 First Dates with Chris HVMMINGBYRD I was a lifestyle and wedding photographer—then brain surgery changed everything. Now, with aphasia, prosopagnosia and memory loss, every day feels like a first date. This podcast is a space for healing, humor, and heart. I’ll share my recovery journey and invite others to tell their stories too. We’re building a community of love, laughter, and second chances—one first date at a time.

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