A Balancing Act: Navigating Memory Loss

Kelly A Bertenshaw, MA CCC SLP ECDCS

When a loved one is diagnosed with Memory Loss or Dementia, family members can feel completely unprepared and overwhelmed. You're now trying to juggle managing your loved one's increasing need for care while also tending to your own family, career and life. It can truly feel like a balancing act. I'm Kelly Bertenshaw, a licensed Speech Language Pathologist and certified Dementia Care Specialist. I have worked with those affected by memory loss and their families for more than 20 years. I started this podcast to help you, the family members, as you navigate this journey. Your questions, comments and experiences will drive all our content. My goal is to provide you with proven strategies, relevant information and research, as well as actionable steps you can take today . Together, we'll find the answers. Because no one should walk this journey alone. RSSVERIFY

  1. Season 1 Episode 28 Dementia and Refusing Help

    24 SEP

    Season 1 Episode 28 Dementia and Refusing Help

    One of the hardest challenges in caregiving is when a loved one with dementia refuses help. You see the risks — missed meals, cluttered spaces, unpaid bills — but every offer is met with “I don’t need help” or “I can do it myself.” It’s frustrating, even heartbreaking. In this episode, Kelly unpacks the reasons behind refusals — from changes in the brain to pride and fear — and explore the most common areas of conflict. Most importantly, you’ll learn practical strategies to shift your approach so that you can reduce conflict, preserve dignity, and find those small but powerful wins in your caregiving journey. FACEBOOK PAGE: We'd love to hear from you! Message Kelly with any questions or comments. https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 RESOURCES: https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/blog/how-offer-help-someone-dementia-who-doesnt-want-it#:~:text=For%20some%20people%2C%20they%20may,having%20a%20diagnosis%20of%20dementia. https://www.bridgesbyepoch.com/2025/03/10/resistance-and-refusals-in-a-loved-one/#:~:text=Pride%20and%20dignity:%20Early%20dementia,play%20a%20role%20in%20resistance. The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    13 min
  2. Season 1 Episode 27 Caregiving Tech: Tools, Tips and Comfort

    10 SEP

    Season 1 Episode 27 Caregiving Tech: Tools, Tips and Comfort

    Caregiving is rewarding, but it can also feel overwhelming—like you’re carrying the weight of a thousand little tasks. In this episode, Kelly explores the best tech tools designed to lighten the caregiver’s load. From medication reminder apps and “Find My” trackers to simple video calling platforms and automatic shut-offs for home safety, these smart solutions are changing the way families care for their loved ones. And get some more time in for themselves. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave your questions for Kelly! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 RESOURCES: https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/living-with-dementia/how-technology-can-help https://www.aarp.org/personal-technology/dementia-caregiver-technology// Caregiving Tech & Support Resources Caregiving Apps & Tools • Medisafe – Medication reminder app that syncs with caregivers. • CareZone – Centralized place for meds, calendars, and health notes. • Lotsa Helping Hands – Shared calendars and task management for families. • Symple or CareClinic – Symptom tracking and health journaling apps. “Find My” & Tracking Gadgets • Apple AirTags – Small Bluetooth trackers for keys, wallets, or bags. • Tile Trackers – Simple tags with phone alerts and community locating. Entertainment & Connection • GrandPad – Simplified tablet for video calls, email, and photos (senior-friendly). • ViewClix Digital Frames – Upload photos remotely; loved ones see them instantly. • Simple Streaming Remotes – Universal remotes with large buttons and pre-set channels (e.g., Flipper Remote). Safety & Monitoring • Alexa Together (Amazon) – Fall detection, daily activity check-ins, and alerts for caregivers. • AngelSense or Medical Guardian – GPS + emergency wearables with caregiver alerts. • Smart Plugs (Kasa, Wemo) – Automatic shut-off for coffee makers, TVs, or lamps. • FireAvert – Stove shut-off device designed for kitchen safety. Caregiver Support & Community • Family Caregiver Alliance (caregiver.org) – Education, resources, and support groups. • AARP Caregiving Resources – Guides, toolkits, and caregiver stories. • The Caregiver Action Network (caregiveraction.org) – Peer support and resources. • Alzheimer’s Association Support Groups – Both online and local chapter connections. The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    13 min
  3. Season 1 Episode 26 Visiting A Loved One In Memory Care

    27 AGO

    Season 1 Episode 26 Visiting A Loved One In Memory Care

    In this episode, Kelly provides essential guidance for families visiting loved ones in memory care communities. Kelly addresses common challenges families face, such as improving the quality of visits and setting realistic expectations. She emphasizes the importance of understanding the stages of dementia and aligning visits with the routine and preferences of the loved one. Practical advice includes planning visits around constructive activities, bringing items of interest, managing sensory overload, and maintaining effective communication. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 RESOURCES: https://alzheimer.ca/en/help-support/i-have-friend-or-family-member-who-lives-dementia/making-meaningful-visits https://training.mmlearn.org/blog/dementia-and-family-visits-tips-for-peaceful-connection Video: The Do's and Don'ts of Visiting A Loved One In Memory Care: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P_CzKR4mCbE The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    13 min
  4. Season 1 Episode 25 "How Can I Improve MY Memory?"

    13 AGO

    Season 1 Episode 25 "How Can I Improve MY Memory?"

    In this episode, Kelly talks about how normal it is to expect occasional forgetfulness as we age and clarifies that it's not the same as memory loss or dementia. She explains how memory works through three stages and provides strategies and tips to boost memory. Kelly also provides practical exercises to keep our brains sharp and active as we age. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 RESOURCES: https://healthonline.washington.edu/sites/default/files/record_pdfs/Memory-Strategies.pdf https://www.parkwoodclinic.com/post/enhancing-memory-external-and-internal-strategies https://alzheimer.ca/sites/default/files/documents/memory-tips-and-tricks.pdf The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    13 min
  5. Season 1 Episode 24 Dementia and Family Relationships

    6 AGO

    Season 1 Episode 24 Dementia and Family Relationships

    In this podcast episode, Kelly discusses how dementia affects family relationships, offering practical advice for spouses, adult children, and grandchildren. She emphasizes the importance of understanding dementia, open communication, dividing caregiving tasks, and supporting each other. The key message: approach the journey with empathy, flexibility, and love, and seek help when needed. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 RESOURCES: https://www.jameslwest.org/blog/dementia-and-family-dynamics-challenges/ https://dementiahelpcenter.com/the-caregivers-bill-of-rights/ https://www.dementiauk.org/information-and-support/looking-after-yourself-as-a-carer/changing-relationships-and-roles/ https://alzheimer.ca/en/help-information/i-have-friend-or-family-member-who-lives-dementia/understanding-how-your The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    15 min
  6. Season 1 Episode 23 "Why Is He Isolating Himself?"

    23 JUL

    Season 1 Episode 23 "Why Is He Isolating Himself?"

    In this episode, Kelly shares personal experiences and discusses how communicative and cognitive changes due to dementia affect seniors' abilities to engage in activities they once enjoyed. Kelly emphasizes the importance of adapting social activities to match the abilities of those with dementia to keep them engaged and improve their quality of life. She offers practical advice on modifying environments, simplifying games, and using effective communication strategies to reduce frustration and promote enjoyable experiences. FACEBOOK PAGE: Please leave questions for Kelly, or set-up a chat! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 RESOURCES: https://seniorservicesofamerica.com/blog/15-meaningful-activities-for-dementia-patients/ https://www.nia.nih.gov/health/alzheimers-caregiving/adapting-activities-people-alzheimers-disease https://www.dementia.org.au/living-dementia/staying-connected/activities-people-dementia The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    12 min
  7. Season 1 Episode 22. Should I Lie To My Loved One?

    9 JUL

    Season 1 Episode 22. Should I Lie To My Loved One?

    In this episode, Kelly addresses the moral dilemma caregivers face: whether to lie or tell the truth to loved ones with dementia. Traditionally, reality orientation—telling the truth—was seen as a matter of principle. But from the 1990s, therapeutic fibbing—small, compassionate lies—gained acceptance. Kelly argues for 'leading with their reality,' adapting responses based on the stage of dementia and what comforts or calms the person. She provides practical advice, ways to respond that meet your loved where they are and how to get self-support for when these situations arise. OUR FACEBOOK PAGE- PLEASE POST ANY QUESTIONS OR COMMENTS HERE. OR, YOU CAN REQUEST A CHAT WITH KELLY! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 RESOURCES: https://www.walkinlab.com/blog/seven-stages-dementia/ https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/blog/lying-to-someone-with-dementia https://iona.org/therapeutic-fibs-ok/ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3s0ktYUIn0Y

    12 min
  8. Season 1 Episode 21 Agitation, Sundowning and Aggression

    25 JUN

    Season 1 Episode 21 Agitation, Sundowning and Aggression

    In this episode of 'A Balancing Act,' host Kelly explores strategies for managing dementia-related agitation, a common issue affecting about 90% of dementia patients. Kelly shares real-life stories from listeners, explains the different types of agitation, and offers practical advice on how family members can respond. Key topics include understanding agitation triggers, the concept of sundowning, and how to use empathy and redirection to calm loved ones. Kelly also highlights the importance of support networks and when to seek medical assistance for aggressive behaviors. Tune in to learn effective ways to provide care and maintain your own well-being. FACEBOOK PAGE- PLEASE, POST YOUR QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS. WE'D LOVE TO HEAR FROM YOU! https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61573800764103 RESOURCES: https://peacefulleadersacademy.com/blog/how-to-calm-agitated-dementia-patient/ https://www.alz.org/help-support/caregiving/stages-behaviors/anxiety-agitation?utm_source=google-grant&utm_medium=paidsearch&utm_campaign=google_grant&gad_source=1&gad_campaignid=90372426&gbraid=0AAAAAD14_NjM9SZfXuuM1bVP4TV7h0X4e&gclid=CjwKCAjw9uPCBhATEiwABHN9K8nOvCGRTUGNHilNzyF5wY8h-kMtip2pK3rz_cc4aqgq_CS2Y9SaJxoCdwgQAvD_BwE The information shared in this podcast is for EDUCATIONAL AND INFORMATIONAL PURPOSES only, and should not be considered a substitute for medical advice. By listening to this podcast, you agree not to use this podcast as medical advice to treat any medical condition in either yourself or others, This entire disclaimer also applies to any guests or contributors to the podcast. Under no circumstances shall Kelly A. Bertenshaw, any guests or contributors to the podcast, or any employees, associates, or affiliates of A Balancing Act: Helping Families Navigate Memory Loss be responsible for damages arising from the use of this podcast.

    14 min
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When a loved one is diagnosed with Memory Loss or Dementia, family members can feel completely unprepared and overwhelmed. You're now trying to juggle managing your loved one's increasing need for care while also tending to your own family, career and life. It can truly feel like a balancing act. I'm Kelly Bertenshaw, a licensed Speech Language Pathologist and certified Dementia Care Specialist. I have worked with those affected by memory loss and their families for more than 20 years. I started this podcast to help you, the family members, as you navigate this journey. Your questions, comments and experiences will drive all our content. My goal is to provide you with proven strategies, relevant information and research, as well as actionable steps you can take today . Together, we'll find the answers. Because no one should walk this journey alone. RSSVERIFY

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