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We all know the frustration of holding onto a grudge. Getting out from underneath it requires choosing forgiveness. It’s a powerful tool that allows us to work through conflict, free from the burden of anger and resentment. It’s a skill we must master and teach to our kids.
 
Why do we want kids to be good at this? It’s a vital skill that leads to healthy conflict management and better friendships. How do we teach our kids to forgive? Try these three steps:
 
1. Define it.
We like to say that forgiveness is deciding that someone who has wronged you doesn’t have to pay.   
 
2. Acknowledge feelings.
It’s totally normal to be hurt and angry when someone has wronged you, but holding onto that pain can impact you and your relationship.
             
3. Lead by Example.
Dad, you have to show them the way on this one. Don’t assume they’ll just figure it out. Model it! 
 
 Today’s Pro Move: Model forgiveness.  
 
Helping your kid define forgiveness helps them to give forgiveness. Talk to your child about the definition of forgiveness. Remind them that God forgave us. 
 
Other resources: 
10 Ways to Teach Your Children How to Forgive 
 Forgiveness is Not What You Think
5 Reasons People Don’t Forgive
 
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As guys, we tend to be critical of ourselves from time to time. Introspection is a good thing, but getting too down on yourself can cause issues for you as a dad. Ted Lowe, Jason Hood, Buck Buchanan, and BJ Foster teach dads how to fight back against their inner critic by showing men how to “name your Fred.”
Pick a name for the voice inside your head. You know the voice. The one that tells you you’re not good enough. The one who says that you’re a failure. The voice can be loud and aggressive, but you can overcome it. Dads have to talk back to that critical voice of negativity. Thinking better about yourself helps you be a better dad.
 
Here are 4 steps to help you put Fred in his place. 
Step 1: Name your Fred. 
Step 2: Write Fred’s messages to you.  
Step 3: Categorize Fred’s messages to you. 
Step 4: Talk back to yourself? 
 
Today’s Pro Move: Name your Fred. By giving him a name, it separates him from you so you can see things more clearly.

Other Resources:
4 Steps to Keep Your Inner Critic From Sabotaging Your Marriage
How To Deal With Criticism
3 Lies Men Believe


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 If stung by a jellyfish, you can neutralize the pain by urinating on it. Not true.
Humans lose most of their body heat through their heads. Not true. 
There are plenty of lies out there that we believe. Which ones plague us as dads?
Ted Lowe, BJ Foster, Jason Hood, and Buck Buchanan tell the truth about how often we fall captive to lies. 


You are well-made, no matter what people say. You are loved unconditionally by God, who created you. These truths can become clouded by the lies of the world. So often, men get lost in lies in an attempt to succeed, conquer, and impress others. The three biggest lies men believe are:
 
1.    I am what I do. 
2.    I am what people say about me. 
3.    I am what I have. 
 
Today’s Pro Move: Ask yourself, what am I tying my identity to and is it solid?
 
 
Related resources: 
3 Lies Men Believe
5 Lies Men Believe About Their Wives
4 Lies Men Believe About Being Successful
  
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When we were little, monsters and aliens were terrifying. Now that we are parents, real-world troubles keep us up at night much more than Godzilla. Fear can be crippling or a motivator. Ted Lowe, BJ Foster, and Buck Buchanan dive into what scares us the most as dads. (Also, they hate clowns)
 
Our fears as dads are a big deal because they impact how we feel about ourselves, how present we can be with our kids, how we respond to them, and even what we teach them about their fears. The 5 fears we break down in this episode are: 
1. Failing
2. Being Incompetent
3. Being Weak (or Being Perceived as Weak)
4. Being Irrelevant
5. Looking Foolish
 
Today’s Pro Move: Choose one of the 5 fears we talked about in this episode and ask yourself: How does this fear impact me as a dad?


Related resources:
The 5 Biggest Fears of Men
Quotes That Inspire Courage
What Does Tony Dungy Fear?


 
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 Kickball in the park. Ice cream on the porch. Having an epic snowball fight on Christmas morning. One of the best parts of being a dad is having fun with your kids, but not every day is a great one. Ted Lowe, Maddow Womble, BJ Foster, and Buck Buchanan share their thoughts on helping kids handle their low moments and provide happy ones. 
Could the key to happiness be unhappiness? Dr. Tovah Klein, a leading child psychologist, says, “Kids know how to be happy, it’s the other emotions where they need us the most. There’s nothing wrong with doing nice things for your kids when they’re unhappy, but it doesn’t always address the source of what’s upsetting the child.” The key to raising happy children is to lovingly allow them to be unhappy.
 
Today’s Pro Move: This week watch how you respond when your child is unhappy.  
 
Related resources: 
5 Subtle Lies When Teaching Kids About Happiness
5 Ways You Make Your Kid Feel Unsafe
10 Ways For Kids to Feel Loved By Their Fathers
Check out All Pro Dad Podcast Episode 7: How Do I Have FREE Fun With My Kids?


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EXTRAS:
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Dads mess up. Yours did. His did. You will, too. We can dwell on those missteps or consider all the things our dads got right. Ted Lowe, Bobby Lewis, and BJ Foster talk about how our upbringings shape us. 
 
We are not going to pretend everyone had a perfect relationship with their dad. Many people can recall hurtful moments from childhood. Those negative memories are powerful. But it is good for our souls to also remember times when our dads loved and rescued us. Remembering what your dad did right helps you to get it right as a dad. Typically, the more gratitude we have, the more contentment we find.
 
Today’s Pro Move: If possible, tell your dad what he did right. If you can’t tell your dad in person, tell him in a text or letter. If he has passed away, then tell your kids what your dad did right. 
 
Related resources:
Lessons From Dad: Why We Should Remember
5 Granddad Traits Dads Should Rip Off
10 Ways to Tell Your Father "Thank You"
 
EXTRAS:
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Join nearly 200,000 other dads by subscribing to the All Pro Dad Play of the Day. Get daily fatherhood ideas, insight, and inspiration sent straight to your inbox.

This episode's show notes can also be viewed here on AllProDad.com.

Like the All Pro Dad gear and mugs? Get your own in the All Pro Dad store.

Get great content for moms at iMOM.com