162 episodes

You can perform emotional alchemy and I will show you how.

The idea of alchemy is to reduce something with fire – burning it down so that something new can rise from the ashes. You can do this with your personality, too. You’ve always had the power; you just didn’t know that. Now you do.
 
Highly sensitive, emotional, and intuitive children are often impacted most severely by dysfunctional family dynamics, childhood emotional neglect, sexual abuse, grooming, generational trauma, and inherited toxic shame. As adults, these same children often find themselves with a disorder or dysfunction label, as mainstream psychiatry tries to convince them that the root of their suffering is due to a disordered personality or chemical imbalance.

Our current medical model of mental health is quick to pathologize. Psychiatrists and therapists operating within this model often ask, “What’s wrong with you?” but rarely, “What *happened* to you?” Personalities are not cancerous tumors; psychological suffering cannot be accurately understood or treated through the lens of a purely medical model. We have to go deeper. And that's exactly what we do here on Back from the Borderline.

A path toward healing exists, even though I know it can feel impossible when you’re looking up from rock bottom.

Through working with and integrating the concepts we explore in each episode together, you’ll learn to:

✧ Better regulate, name and process your emotions
✧ Understand and reduce chronic feelings of emptiness
✧ Confront and uproot your toxic shame
✧ Put an end to recurring patterns of self-sabotage
✧ Connect with your Higher Self
✧ Break the cycle of generational family trauma
✧ Set healthier boundaries with yourself and others
✧ Recognize the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships
✧ Heal from a chronic need to please and seek validation from others

Tune in and prepare yourself to be standing in the ashes of the person you used to be. New episodes drop every Tuesday.
 
As for me? I'm Mollie Adler. A disillusioned millennial, podcaster, writer, creative, existential thinker, obsessive researcher (huge nerd), and fellow f*cked up human desperately trying to find meaning in a society and culture that seems to be devoid of it. To read my Substack articles, access my Amazon book recommendation list, submit a voicemail, or contact me for collaborations, visit https://linktr.ee/backfromtheborderline. 

Anyone – even you – can come Back From the Borderline. 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 

acast+ https://plus.acast.com/s/back-from-the-borderline.



Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

back from the borderline mollie adler

    • Health & Fitness
    • 4.8 • 379 Ratings

You can perform emotional alchemy and I will show you how.

The idea of alchemy is to reduce something with fire – burning it down so that something new can rise from the ashes. You can do this with your personality, too. You’ve always had the power; you just didn’t know that. Now you do.
 
Highly sensitive, emotional, and intuitive children are often impacted most severely by dysfunctional family dynamics, childhood emotional neglect, sexual abuse, grooming, generational trauma, and inherited toxic shame. As adults, these same children often find themselves with a disorder or dysfunction label, as mainstream psychiatry tries to convince them that the root of their suffering is due to a disordered personality or chemical imbalance.

Our current medical model of mental health is quick to pathologize. Psychiatrists and therapists operating within this model often ask, “What’s wrong with you?” but rarely, “What *happened* to you?” Personalities are not cancerous tumors; psychological suffering cannot be accurately understood or treated through the lens of a purely medical model. We have to go deeper. And that's exactly what we do here on Back from the Borderline.

A path toward healing exists, even though I know it can feel impossible when you’re looking up from rock bottom.

Through working with and integrating the concepts we explore in each episode together, you’ll learn to:

✧ Better regulate, name and process your emotions
✧ Understand and reduce chronic feelings of emptiness
✧ Confront and uproot your toxic shame
✧ Put an end to recurring patterns of self-sabotage
✧ Connect with your Higher Self
✧ Break the cycle of generational family trauma
✧ Set healthier boundaries with yourself and others
✧ Recognize the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships
✧ Heal from a chronic need to please and seek validation from others

Tune in and prepare yourself to be standing in the ashes of the person you used to be. New episodes drop every Tuesday.
 
As for me? I'm Mollie Adler. A disillusioned millennial, podcaster, writer, creative, existential thinker, obsessive researcher (huge nerd), and fellow f*cked up human desperately trying to find meaning in a society and culture that seems to be devoid of it. To read my Substack articles, access my Amazon book recommendation list, submit a voicemail, or contact me for collaborations, visit https://linktr.ee/backfromtheborderline. 

Anyone – even you – can come Back From the Borderline. 𓆩ᥫ᭡𓆪 

acast+ https://plus.acast.com/s/back-from-the-borderline.



Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    childhood emotional neglect part 6: linking past pain and present health while challenging the myths of modern recovery methods

    childhood emotional neglect part 6: linking past pain and present health while challenging the myths of modern recovery methods

    Episode 6 of my deep-dive into Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) series ventures into uncharted territories, where the shadows of neglect stretch beyond the emotional realm to cast a profound impact on your physical well-being. This segment peels back the layers of how emotional turmoil from neglect and trauma in our formative years doesn't just scar our emotional landscapes but also seeds the ground for physical diseases and chronic conditions that can shorten your lifespan and diminish your quality of life.
    In this pivotal episode, I unravel the science and soul behind Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs), illuminating how early-life stressors metamorphose from emotional dis-ease into tangible physical disease. I dissect the intricate web connecting our brains, bodies, and minds, challenging the conventional medical model's fragmented approach to mental health, which often seeks to bandage symptoms without addressing their rooted causes.
    But I don't stop at diagnosing the problem. This episode takes a bold step forward, critiquing the well-intentioned yet flawed one-size-fits-all healing narratives prevalent in today's self-help and recovery resources. I question the promises of returning to a state of 'pre-trauma purity' and dissect why such prescriptive paths often lead individuals down shame spirals, feeling irretrievably broken.
    As I delve into these critical conversations, I propose an alternative healing model—one that embraces the power of individuation, the transformative magic of emotional alchemy, and the profound strength found in our scars. This model doesn't seek to erase your past but integrates it, allowing you to craft a narrative of healing that's as unique as your experiences.
    Join me in Episode 6 for a transformative exploration that promises to redefine your understanding of healing. Let's journey together towards a new paradigm where healing is seen not as a destination but as a continuous process of becoming, where every scar is a testament to your resilience and every step forward is a victory.
    Recommended Resources:
    ✧ Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect by Jonice Webb, PhD
    ✧ Childhood Disrupted: How Your Biography Becomes Your Biology, and How You Can Heal by Donna Jackson Nakazawa
    CONTACT ME + UNLOCK PREMIUM: To join the Premium Submarines on Patreon (unlocking full + ad-free episodes), check out my sponsors, or contact me, visit backfromtheborderline.com.
     
    Disclaimer: The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.
    acast+ https://plus.acast.com/s/back-from-the-borderline.



    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    • 1 hr 9 min
    reparenting visualization series introduction [free premium offering]

    reparenting visualization series introduction [free premium offering]

    This is the introductory episode of a premium visualization series available exclusively to my paid subscribers - I've made the full episode available to you for free to provide a taste of what you can expect in the following visualizations. This initial episode is your gateway to a journey of deep healing and self-discovery, where you'll learn to nurture and reclaim parts of yourself that may have been lost or neglected.
     
    Inspired by John Bradshaw's influential book, "Homecoming: Reclaiming and Championing Your Inner Child," this series is designed to guide you through healing your inner child at various stages, from infancy through adolescence. With each step, you'll be supported by specific solfeggio frequencies, enhancing the therapeutic impact of the meditations. This structured approach ensures you address each critical phase of development in sequence, enabling a comprehensive healing experience.
     
    Expect this process to evoke a range of emotions, as it's designed to touch on deep-seated wounds and offer paths to healing and wholeness. Through guided meditations and affirmations, you'll be given tools to address and heal from relational and attachment traumas, providing the nurturing, protection, and validation that may have been missing in your childhood.
     
    This introductory episode sets the stage for a transformative journey, laying out the why and how of our work together. As you proceed, remember this is a safe space for exploration and healing, and you're encouraged to revisit this introduction whenever you need grounding or a reminder of the journey's purpose.
    UNLOCK THE VISUALIZATIONS: After listening to this introductory episode, the next step is to move onto to the subsequent visualizations in the series. The next episode is titled “re-parenting visualization series E01: inner infant.” All four episodes (once released) will be easily accessible for future (and repeated) listening in the “re-parenting visualizations” collection in Patreon. To sign up for access, visit https://www.patreon.com/backfromtheborderline or backfromtheborderline.com.
    Disclaimer: The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.
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    • 36 min
    childhood emotional neglect part 5: sociopathic, childlike, and well-meaning-but-neglected-themselves parents

    childhood emotional neglect part 5: sociopathic, childlike, and well-meaning-but-neglected-themselves parents

    While this is far from the final episode of our mega-series exploring the impacts of Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN), this does mark the final episode exploring the various dysfunctional parenting styles that can contribute to its development. Join me for part five, where we delve into the profound and often covertly traumatic world shaped by parents who, through their own unresolved issues, inadvertently sow the seeds of emotional neglect in their children.
    This episode takes us through the diverse landscapes of family dynamics, from the outwardly successful yet emotionally void households of sociopath parents, to the role-reversed scenarios of parentification, and into the silent generational cycles of neglect perpetuated by the well-meaning but emotionally neglected parents themselves.
    A breakdown of the various dysfunctional parenting styles covered in this episode:
    1.The Sociopath Parent: Beyond the sensationalized depictions lies a reality far more complex and closer to the realm of the everyday. We explore the subtle manipulations and emotional vacuums created by parents lacking in empathy and moral grounding, highlighting the indelible impact on children left to navigate these turbulent waters.
    2.The Parent Acting Like a Child (parental enmeshment / parentification / emotional incest): Here, the traditional roles are inverted, thrusting children into premature adulthood. We examine the emotional and psychological toll exacted on children forced into caretaking roles, deprived not only of their childhood but also of the foundational emotional support crucial for healthy development.
    3.The “Well-Meaning but Neglected Themselves” Parent: Unveiling the silent echo of generational emotional neglect, this segment sheds light on parents who, devoid of a model for emotional attunement, unknowingly perpetuate a legacy of emotional silence and absence, despite their best intentions and love for their children.
    Through poignant vignettes and heartfelt reflections shared in the Childhood Emotional Neglect Subreddit, this episode offers a mirror to the nuanced experiences of those navigating the legacy of CEN. From the depths of unrecognized emotional turmoil to the courageous journey towards healing and self-discovery, we explore the transformative power of understanding, empathy, and the human capacity for resilience. Join me as we dive deep into these complex parenting styles, unearthing the silent narratives of neglect and the paths towards breaking the cycles that bind us. This episode not only aims to illuminate the shadows of CEN but also to offer solace, understanding, and hope to those who find their stories reflected in these discussions.
    Recommended Resources:
    ✧ Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect by Jonice Webb, PhD
    ✧ Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker
    CONTACT ME + UNLOCK PREMIUM: To join the Premium Submarines on Patreon (unlocking full + ad-free episodes), check out my sponsors, or contact me, visit backfromtheborderline.com
     
    Disclaimer: The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.
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    • 1 hr 48 min
    childhood emotional neglect part 4: workaholic, perfection-obsessed, and special-care parents

    childhood emotional neglect part 4: workaholic, perfection-obsessed, and special-care parents

    Part four of our series unfolds the complex narratives of three more distinct parenting styles that, beneath their unique challenges, share a common thread of emotional neglect. Together, we’ll navigate the realms of “the Workaholic Parent”, “the Perfection-Obsessed Parent”, and “The Parent Caring for a Family Member Who Requires Special Attention”, each presenting a unique set of psychological dynamics that inadvertently contribute to Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN).
    1. The Workaholic Parent: In a society that prizes achievement and productivity, the workaholic parent's ceaseless pursuit of professional success often comes at the expense of meaningful family interactions. Through Lily's story, we explore how a childhood adorned with material wealth yet devoid of emotional depth leaves enduring scars, highlighting the silent longing for parental presence and understanding.
    2. The Perfection-Obsessed Parent: The relentless chase for flawlessness and high achievement drives a wedge between parent and child, where love feels conditional on success. Liam's journey reveals the internal battle of living up to impossibly high standards, fostering a sense of inadequacy and a quest for external validation that overlooks the child's emotional needs and intrinsic value.
    3. The Parent Caring for a Family Member Who Requires Special Attention (due to illness, disability, addiction, or persistent mental health struggles): Tasked with an extraordinary responsibility, these parents navigate a daily reality of immense challenge and devotion. Through the experiences of Emily and Alex, we delve into the emotional landscape of siblings who, amidst the family's focused caregiving, grapple with feelings of invisibility, guilt, and the unintended neglect of their emotional well-being.
    This episode seeks to illuminate the nuanced psychological "whys" behind these parenting styles and the inadvertent emotional neglect they can engender. Through a compassionate lens, we aim to foster understanding, healing, and a dialogue on the importance of balancing the demands of work, aspirations, and caregiving with the essential emotional connection every child deserves.
    Join me as we navigate these intricate family dynamics, underscored by insights from depth psychology and personal stories of resilience. This exploration is an invitation to parents and families to reflect, acknowledge, and shift towards more emotionally attuned and connected relationships.
    Recommended resources:
    ✧ Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect by Jonice Webb, PhD
    ✧ Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker
    CONTACT ME + UNLOCK PREMIUM: To join the Premium Submarines on Patreon (unlocking full + ad-free episodes), check out my sponsors, or contact me, visit backfromtheborderline.com
     
    Disclaimer: The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.
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    • 1 hr 20 min
    is avoiding discomfort by self-censorship halting your healing process? [preview]

    is avoiding discomfort by self-censorship halting your healing process? [preview]

    In this free preview of a premium episode, we dive deep into the realm of self-censorship, exploring its nuanced definition as the act of muting one's own voice out of fear or deference to others' sensibilities, without external compulsion. Kicking off with insights from Africa Brooke—a London-based beacon in overcoming self-sabotage and self-censorship—we dissect the intricacies of muting oneself in a world increasingly intolerant of dissenting voices.
    Africa Brooke, renowned for her candid exploration of self-sabotage and self-censorship, lends her expertise, illustrating the perilous landscape of public discourse, where expressing divergent views can result in exile or digital vilification. The episode is enriched by Brooke's recent Instagram video, heralding her forthcoming book "The Third Perspective: Brave Expression in The Age of Intolerance." Here, she delves into self-censorship's societal toll, advocating for a culture of "disagreeing well" and championing the art of pushback against collective sabotage—familiarly known as cancel culture. Her conviction? That navigating the treacherous waters of self-censorship and cancel culture demands a return to courageous, unfiltered expression.
    Through a meticulous exploration, we examine how self-censorship not only erodes personal integrity but also perpetuates a cycle of mutual surveillance, stifling societal progress. Drawing from a spectrum of thinkers, from Ada Palmer's historical perspectives to Orwell's dystopian foresights, we unpack the broader implications of self-censorship on freedom, control, and the collective psyche. Join me as we venture beyond the surface, challenging ourselves to confront the internalized censorship that shadows our discourse.
    Recommended Resources:
    ✧ Dive into Africa Brooke’s work at https://africabrooke.com/ or follow her on Instagram @africabrooke [you can pre-order her book here]
    ✧ 1984 by George Orwell
    ✧ Brave New World by Aldous Huxley
    UNLOCK THE FULL VERSION OF THIS EPISODE: visit https://www.patreon.com/backfromtheborderline to join the community on Patreon. From here, you'll be able to access all full-length (and ad free!) episodes of BFTB.
     
    CONTACT ME CHECK OUT MORE OF MY WORK: To read my Substack articles, access my Amazon book recommendation list, submit a voicemail, or contact me for collaborations, visit backfromtheborderline.com.
    acast+ https://plus.acast.com/s/back-from-the-borderline.



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    • 28 min
    childhood emotional neglect part 3: divorced, grieving, addicted, and depressed parenting

    childhood emotional neglect part 3: divorced, grieving, addicted, and depressed parenting

    This third installment of our series on Childhood Emotional Neglect (CEN) continues to unravel the intricate web of parenting styles that inadvertently contribute to emotional neglect. Focused on the more nuanced and often overlooked aspects of parenting under the duress of personal challenges, this episode examines:

    The Divorced or Grieving Parent: Discusses how the intense sorrow from loss or separation can overshadow a parent's ability to attend to their child's emotional needs. It highlights the complex dynamic where children must navigate their own grief or confusion alongside the emotional unavailability of their grieving or divorced parent, leading to unintentional emotional neglect.The Addicted Parent: Explores the dual life of addicted parents who oscillate between affection and neglect. This segment delves into the unpredictable nature of addiction, where children are left in a state of constant uncertainty about their parent's emotional availability, thus experiencing a unique form of CEN shaped by the shadow of addiction.The Depressed Parent: Illuminates the impact of a parent's depression on the family dynamic, particularly on the emotional development of the child. It explains how depression's consuming nature can lead to a parent's emotional withdrawal, forcing children into roles beyond their years and fostering an environment where emotional needs are sidelined.
    Through detailed vignettes, this episode paints a vivid picture of the silent struggle children face when growing up with parents who, though possibly well-meaning, are caught in their own battles with grief, addiction, or depression. It aims to foster a deeper understanding of the nuanced ways CEN manifests in these settings and advocates for a compassionate approach to healing and support for families navigating these challenging circumstances.
    Listeners are invited to explore the depth psychological perspectives on these parenting styles, understanding how a parent's unresolved issues and personal struggles can profoundly affect their approach to parenting and, consequently, their child's emotional well-being.
    Recommended resources:
    ✧ Running on Empty: Overcome Your Childhood Emotional Neglect by Jonice Webb, PhD
    ✧ Complex PTSD: From Surviving to Thriving by Pete Walker
    CONTACT ME + UNLOCK PREMIUM: To join the Premium Submarines on Patreon (unlocking full + ad-free episodes), check out my sponsors, or contact me, visit backfromtheborderline.com
    Disclaimer: The information contained in this podcast episode is for educational and entertainment purposes only and is not intended as a substitute for treatment or consultation with a licensed mental health professional.
    acast+ https://plus.acast.com/s/back-from-the-borderline.



    Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

    • 1 hr 22 min

Customer Reviews

4.8 out of 5
379 Ratings

379 Ratings

Aunt Hols ,

Frozen in fight flight or freeze

Or maybe I am fighting or my nerves could be flying around me. I’m a 21 year almost 22 year traumatic brain injury survivor. I developed a disorder that causes constant shaking. My trauma started when I was 16 and I am now 37 and stuck. This podcast has given me a good idea of how I could be affected. Thank you!

parisggggggg ,

long time listener

This podcast helped me a lot last year. I especially related to and found comfort in topics like the mother wound, toxic family systems, toxic shame,family scapegoats. I really loved the host talked in such a way that was so relatable- in simple terms about topics and experiences that most everyone listening could understand and relate to. it made it feel like i was listening to a close friend talk about things I’ve had a lifetime of experience and struggle with too. I will say though i stopped listening as much recently. most episodes are still titled relatably but when you actually listen to the episode, it just sounds like a big word salad or a thesis paper. it just feels very commercial which is sad to see. would love to hear the old molly get on and talk about her life and some real stuff again.

Sierra0023 ,

This podcast has changed my life

My experience in therapy has been completely disempowering and this label has taken so much from me, but Molly is helping me to find empowerment beyond this diagnosis again. Molly is so intelligent and well read and eloquent in delivering the most useful and trauma informed information and weaving it together with spiritual principles to create a really holistic path of healing.

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