Because I've Healed

Asha Wilkerson
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You did everything right. And still... something's off. Not quite broken, but not quite right either. Because I've Healed is for high-achieving Black women who are ready to stop performing and come home to themselves. We have real conversations and give real solutions. Asha Wilkerson is a former attorney, healing guide, and retreat curator in Lisbon, Portugal. She's been where you are. She got out., and she came back to get you! New episodes drop regularly. Go deeper with Love Notes, a weekly email for women ready to trust themselves again.

  1. قبل ١٧ ساعة

    Ep 55: Fight. Flight. Freeze. Fawn. What Your Body Is Trying to Tell You

    Have you ever found yourself completely staring at a blank screen, unable to reply to emails or cross items off your to-do list, and immediately labeled it as laziness or procrastination? I’m pulling back the curtain on a deeply personal reveal. Recently, I found myself sliding from a state of high anxiety and overfunctioning straight into a deep freeze mode, and I didn't even notice the shift until I started explaining the nervous system to someone else. In this episode, I talk about what it actually means when our bodies hit a wall. As Black women and high-achievers, we are conditioned to stay in prolonged states of survival because our environments rarely feel safe enough to prioritize deep peace or rest. I break down the four primary nervous system responses: Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn, and how they show up disguised as productivity, perpetual busyness, avoidance, and people-pleasing. You aren't broken, and you aren't lazy. Your body is simply doing exactly what it learned to do to protect you. Let’s talk about how to meet ourselves with radical self-compassion and move through it in real time. (00:00) - The Journey of Healing and Growth (02:49) - Understanding the Nervous System's Response (05:45) - Navigating Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Fawn Modes (09:03) - Personal Experience with Overwhelm (11:45) - Recognizing and Addressing Overwhelm (15:12) - Seeking Support and Making Changes (18:06) - The Importance of Self-Compassion (21:08) - Finding the Right Support (24:03) - Communicating Needs and Setting Boundaries (26:55) - Creating Opportunities for Rest and Growth Key Takeaways • Fight, flight, freeze, and fawn are survival responses, not personality flaws. • High achievers often stay in survival mode so long that it begins to feel normal. • Freeze mode isn't laziness. Sometimes it's your nervous system hitting a wall. • Your body is always communicating with you. • Healing isn't about forcing yourself through overwhelm. It's about learning what your body needs next. • Sometimes the most healing thing you can do is ask for different support. • You don't have to be completely healed before you can continue growing.

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  2. ٣٠ يونيو

    Ep 54: How to Journal When You Don't Know What to Write

    If you are a high-achieving woman who has spent years in survival mode, journaling can feel incredibly intimidating. We’re often told to "just write your feelings down," but when you’ve been disconnected from your body just to get through the day, you look at a blank page and completely freeze. You might worry you're doing it wrong, or your brain instantly tries to edit every sentence before your pen even hits the paper. In this episode, I want to demystify the practice of journaling and examine it through neurological and somatic lenses. Writing by hand isn't just about recording facts; it’s a physical act that slows down your racing thoughts and creates a powerful mind-body loop. I'm breaking down three simple, unconventional journaling exercises designed to bypass your inner critic, release low-grade stress, and help you start exactly where you are. 00:00 - Introduction to Journaling Challenges 02:12 - The Neuroscience of Handwriting 06:00 - Journaling Exercises: Writing From Feelings 15:39 - Unsent Letters: Emotional Release 22:17 - The Drain: Clearing Emotional Clutter Key Takeaways ✨ Journaling is not a writing skill. It's a self-connection skill. ✨ Handwriting slows your brain down enough to process what you're experiencing rather than simply react to it. ✨ The emotion underneath the goal matters more than the goal itself. ✨ You don't need to know how something will happen before you allow yourself to feel what you want. ✨ If you're disconnected from your emotions, start with what is easiest to access. Even irritation, frustration, or complaints. ✨ Sometimes emotional clarity comes after writing, not before. ✨ There is no "right way" to journal. ✨ Recognizing your emotions, staying connected to them, and articulating them are all learnable skills. ✨ The goal isn't to write perfectly. ✨ The goal is to hear yourself. Connect With Me Threads: Come hang out and share your thoughts with me over on Threads at @AshaWilkersonESQ. Community: Leave a comment on this podcast episode and let me know which of these three exercises landed best in your spirit this week. Enjoyed This Episode? Share it with a friend who keeps saying they should journal but never knows where to start. And if you try one of these exercises this week, I'd love to hear how it goes. Come home to yourself. 🌿

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  3. ٢٣ يونيو

    Ep 53: The Difference Between an Emotion and a Feeling

    Last week, I shared what to do when you're in the middle of a difficult emotional experience. This week, I want to go deeper into something that often gets misunderstood: the difference between emotions and feelings. Most of us use those words interchangeably, but they're not actually the same thing. In this episode, I break down how emotions are automatic physiological responses that happen in the body before we have time to think, while feelings are the stories and interpretations we create around those emotional experiences. I share examples from my own life, including my years as an attorney, and how childhood experiences still show up in my dating life today. We'll explore why understanding this distinction can be so powerful on your healing journey, how trauma influences the way we interpret emotional data, and why learning to separate the emotion from the story can create more freedom, self-awareness, and choice in your life. If you've ever wondered why certain situations trigger such strong reactions or why you sometimes feel stuck in patterns that don't seem logical, this episode is for you. (00:00) - Understanding Emotions and Feelings (09:55) - The Role of Emotions in Healing (16:14) - Practical Applications and Resources Takeaways ✨ Emotions and feelings are not the same thing. Emotions are automatic physiological responses that occur in the body before conscious thought. Feelings are the interpretations and meanings we assign to those emotional experiences. ✨ You cannot stop yourself from having emotions. Emotions are part of being human. They serve as information and help us navigate the world by signaling what feels safe, unsafe, desirable, or threatening. ✨ The body reacts before the mind understands. Fear, joy, sadness, anger, and excitement often arise in the body before we've had a chance to consciously process what's happening. ✨ Feelings are shaped by your history. Your past experiences, beliefs, culture, nervous system patterns, and personal stories all influence how you interpret emotional experiences. ✨ Healing requires separating the emotion from the story. A physiological response may be based on past experiences that are no longer relevant to your current reality. Learning to distinguish between the two creates space for new choices and healthier responses. ✨ Triggers are part of being human. You cannot move through life without being triggered. What matters is not whether the trigger happens, but how you interpret and respond to the information it provides. ✨ Emotions can be stored in the body. Practices such as breathwork, bodywork, energy work, and tapping can help release stored emotional responses and create greater emotional freedom. ✨ You may not control your emotions, but you can develop agency around your feelings. With awareness and practice, you can choose how you interpret emotional experiences and how you respond to them. Resources Mentioned 📚 Psychology Today The Important Difference Between Emotions and Feelings (February 2022) Referenced for its distinction between emotions as "raw data" and feelings as the stories we create around them. 📚 BetterHelp Are Emotions and Feelings The Same Thing? Referenced for research discussing how emotions occur unconsciously in response to stimuli and feelings arise once the brain interprets those changes. 📚 Karla McLaren Is It a Feeling or Is It an Emotion? Revisited Somatic educator and researcher whose work defines emotions as physiological experiences that provide information and feelings as conscious awareness of those experiences. Connect with me over on Threads @AshaWilkersonEsq and let me know how this episode landed in your body. Come home to yourself.

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  4. ١٦ يونيو

    Ep 52: When "Tough Times Don't Last" Isn't Enough

    A few weeks ago, I came across a post on Threads that stopped me in my tracks. A woman wrote, "Somewhere deep within it hurts. Really wish I could get the words out, but it's so heavy to pen down." What struck me wasn't just what she said. It was who she appeared to be from the outside: successful, accomplished, building a business, encouraging others. And yet beneath all of that, something felt heavy. It reminded me how many of us are walking around carrying emotions we don't know what to do with. In this episode, I'm sharing a practical framework for navigating those moments when life feels overwhelming. Not with platitudes or toxic positivity, but with real steps you can take when you're in the trenches. We'll explore why feeling deeply doesn't mean you're broken, how to identify what your body and nervous system need, and how to use your emotions as information instead of getting lost in the stories they create. If you've ever felt stuck, heavy, overwhelmed, or unsure how to move through difficult emotions, this conversation is for you. (00:00) - Navigating Vulnerability on Social Media (02:52) - Understanding and Normalizing Emotions (05:45) - Identifying Needs and Seeking Support (09:00) - Decoding Emotions: Information vs. Story (12:02) - Practical Steps for Emotional Awareness (14:55) - Bridging Knowledge and Practice in Emotional Health Takeaways ✨ You are not broken because you feel deeply. Heavy emotions are not a sign that something is wrong with you. They are part of being human and provide valuable information about what is happening beneath the surface. ✨ Before you move on, ask yourself what you need. Instead of rushing to "fix" the feeling, pause and identify what would help you feel supported. Sometimes it's a hug, a conversation, rest, movement, nature, or simply being witnessed. ✨ Co-regulation is not a weakness. Humans are relational beings. Reaching out for support, connection, or comfort is often exactly what your nervous system needs to return to safety. ✨ Emotions carry information. Once your nervous system has settled, get curious. Ask yourself what the sensation in your body is trying to communicate rather than immediately reacting to it. ✨ Separate the emotion from the story. The emotion is the raw experience in your body. The story is the meaning your mind creates around it. Learning the difference can help you respond more intentionally. ✨ You can't always control what you feel, but you can choose how you respond. When you understand what an emotion is trying to tell you, you gain the power to decide what happens next. Connect with me on Threads: @ashawilkersonesq

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  5. ٩ يونيو

    Ep 51: Why You Can't Take Everybody's Advice (Even When It Comes from Love)

    When you’re in a major season of transition, it’s completely natural to feel restless, unsure, and a little bit blind to your next move. But when we look outward for constant validation, we accidentally open the door for other people to build a ceiling over our lives. Key Takeaways External blueprints cannot solve internal transitions: Polling the audience when you are unsure only dilutes your path. You are the only one who has to live inside the life you are actively building. Limitations can be born out of love: The people closest to you project their own relationship with fear and safety onto your life. Their desire to protect you shouldn't become a ceiling that limits your expansion. Trust how advice lands in your body: If a piece of advice does not land all the way right in your spirit or your body, it will never work out the way it was intended to. Your physical alignment is your compass. Be fiercely choosy about who speaks into your life: You do not have to stop loving your family or friends, but you do have to recognize who has the capacity to hold your vision. Your future is worth pouring into, and it deserves protection. Ubuntu Design https://ubuntudesign.life/#/ 00:00 - Navigating Advice in Times of Transition 05:12 - Understanding Your Own Guidance 10:51 - The Limitations of Well-Meaning Advice 15:10 - Protecting Your Unique Vision In this episode, I get radically honest about my own four-year transition out of California and full-time legal work. I break down why the people who love you most will often give you advice designed to keep you safe rather than help you grow, how to filter through outside noise, and how to build the muscle required to trust the unique blueprint of your own vision.

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  6. ٢ يونيو

    Ep 50: Tuning In: How to Trust the Subtle Voice of Your Intuition

    Have you ever had a random thought cross your mind, brushed it off, and then later found out it was completely accurate? You look back and think, Dang it, I should have clocked that. This week at the studio, we are talking about learning how to trust yourself and the decisions you make based on your intuition or your inner knowing. For a long time, I didn't think I was intuitive at all because my style didn't look like my mom's. But the truth is, we are all born with this capability. Because everything is made of energy, your intuition is simply your ability to perceive information beyond your five physical senses in this 3D world. In this episode, I break down what the "Claire" senses actually look like in real life, from hearing the voice of wisdom to tasting unexpected memories. I share personal stories of how this plays out in my own life here in Portugal (including a countercultural nudge involving the local police), and I give you three practical, everyday steps to stop gaslighting yourself, dial in your inner knowing, and test the universe for yourself. (00:00) - Unlocking Intuition: A Personal Journey (06:05) - Understanding Intuition: The Claire Senses (11:43) - Trusting Your Intuition: Practical Steps (17:55) - Asking for Signs: Engaging with the Universe Key Takeaways The Physics of Intuition: Your intuition isn't magic; it’s science. Everything is made of energy, and energy impacts other energy. Intuition is simply perceiving that energy beyond the naked eye. The Everyday Nudge: Unless you are in danger, normal everyday intuition is rarely a loud, neon sign. It is incredibly subtle. Learning to trust it means paying attention to the quick, quiet thoughts that drop in. Three Steps to Trust Your Knowing: To sharpen your volume, start keeping a log of your inner hits, follow small grocery-store-level nudges, and challenge the universe by asking for a highly specific confirmation sign. Book Mentioned in this episode: Signs: The Secret Language of the Universe by Laura Lynne Jackson Join the RESET Journey: If you are a busy, burned-out, exhausted Black woman who is tired of feeling like you've done everything right on paper but something is still missing, it's time to come home to yourself. Take a look at our 6-week course or join us for our intimate, two-day RESET Retreat in Lisbon this July 3rd and 4th. [Click Here to Learn More & Enroll] Get on the List: Don't miss out on weekly love notes and studio updates. [Join My Mailing List Here] Chapters: Key TakeawaysBook mentioned: Connect With Asha

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  7. ٢٦ مايو

    Ep 49: Your Comfort Zone is a Big Fat Lie!

    People call it a comfort zone all the time. But what if the thing you’re struggling to leave isn’t actually comfortable? In this episode, Asha unpacks the difference between what is comfortable and what is simply familiar, and why confusing the two can keep you stuck in jobs, relationships, routines, and identities that no longer fit who you are becoming. Because the truth is, most people are not staying because they feel good; they’re staying because they know what to expect. This conversation moves through nervous systems, survival instincts, language, and the stories we tell ourselves about change. Asha shares personal reflections about chronic back pain, leaving a tenured teaching career in the U.S., moving to Portugal, and what it means to stop choosing discomfort simply because it’s predictable. If you’ve been circling a decision for months, if something in your life feels heavy, restrictive, or misaligned, if you keep calling it a “comfort zone” even though it doesn’t actually feel good, this episode might help you tell the truth about what’s really happening. And once you tell the truth, the next step becomes easier to see. 00:00 - Understanding Comfort vs Familiarity 09:58 - Embracing Change and the Unfamiliar 16:56 - Identifying Your Hesitations Why your brain mistakes familiarity for safetyThe nervous system’s relationship to change and uncertaintyHow language shapes the choices you believe are available to youThe hidden exhaustion of staying in lives that no longer fitWhy unfamiliar doesn’t mean dangerousWhat helped Asha leave a life that looked successful on paper but no longer felt alignedIs this situation actually comfortable or just familiar?Am I staying because it feels good, or because I know what to expect?What might become possible if I stopped treating unfamiliarity like danger?Resources: Join Love Notes, the email for high-achieving Black women who've done everything right and still feel like something's missing: self-trust, nervous system, and coming home to the freedom that's always been yours. Learn more about RESET. Ask a question in the RESET WhatsApp group. RESET: A six-week experience for high-achieving Black women who are ready to stop performing and come home to themselves. Inside RESET, we explore nervous system regulation, ancestral connection, identity shifts, rest, and the space between the life you built and the life you actually want. If enrollment is currently closed, future cohorts and retreats will still be announced. In this episode:Questions to sit with after listening:

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  8. ١٩ مايو

    Ep 48: Burnout Recovery for Black Women: Where to Actually Start

    Burned Out and Stuck: Where Black Women Start Over You've done everything right. And somehow you're standing at the top of the ladder, wondering why you don't want to climb anymore, or worse, not even knowing what you'd want instead. That freeze isn't a character flaw. It's not a sign that something's broken in you. It's a signal that your sacral chakra, the part of you that learned what you liked and what lit you up, went quiet a long time ago, somewhere between the degrees and the promotions and the people you were making proud. In this episode, I talk about what it actually means to reignite it, and why clarity doesn't come from thinking harder. It comes from moving. I also walk through RESET, my six-week program for high-achieving Black women who are stuck in the "in between" and don't quite know where to start. We work through listening to your body, releasing what you inherited that was never yours to carry, and mapping the desires you've been told are too much. It's not about blowing your life up. It's about creating enough space to finally hear yourself. Chapters: (00:00) Navigating Uncertainty: Where to Start?(05:41) Where to Start When You Don't Know What Change to Make(06:34) How the HELD Retreat Supports Your Process(07:23) RESET Gets You UnStuck in 6 Weeks(12:32) How RESET Moves You Forward(13:52) Which RESET Option Is Right for You?(15:36) Asha's Move from Burnout to Lisbon Resources: Join Love Notes, the email for high-achieving Black women who've done everything right and still feel like something's missing: self-trust, nervous system, and coming home to the freedom that's always been yours. Learn more about RESET. Ask a question in the RESET WhatsApp group.

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You did everything right. And still... something's off. Not quite broken, but not quite right either. Because I've Healed is for high-achieving Black women who are ready to stop performing and come home to themselves. We have real conversations and give real solutions. Asha Wilkerson is a former attorney, healing guide, and retreat curator in Lisbon, Portugal. She's been where you are. She got out., and she came back to get you! New episodes drop regularly. Go deeper with Love Notes, a weekly email for women ready to trust themselves again.

المعلومات

  • صناع العمل
    Asha Wilkerson
  • سنوات النشاط
    ٢٠٢٣ - ٢٠٢٦
  • الحلقات
    ٥٥
  • التقييم
    ملائم
  • حقوق النشر
    © Asha Wilkerson
  • موقع البرنامج على الويب
    Because I've Healed

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