Buckskin Rides Again

Tamela Rich

At sixty-three, Tamela Rich—aka “Buckskin”—set off solo on her motorcycle for a cross-country ride: 4,820 miles through eleven states and decades of family memory. Along the way, she encounters a host of road-trip characters—from gas-station prophets and drivers hauling questionable cargo to park rangers and old men making honor bets. Buckskin Rides Again is not just a ride across America. It’s a journey through the deeper lines laid down by family, history, and time. tamelarich.substack.com

  1. JAN 18

    [Dispatch #24] The Re-Entry Zone (and the final dispatch)

    When I got home, everyone said the same thing: You must’ve had the time of your life! And yes, I did. But the tone in their voice tells me they picture my experience through the lens of leisure. No one imagines the reality: a woman on a motorcycle, sweating through her gear, scanning mirrors, reading crosswinds, and burning 175 to 200 calories an hour just to stay upright—about the same as an hour of circuit training, rowing, or a moderate hike in the woods. It looks fun—and it is fun—but it’s also work: physical, mental, emotional. The road asks something of me every minute. I’m not complaining; I love the demand. To the world it’s an escape. To me, it’s deep engagement. There’s a gender dynamic at play, too. When women go away—especially middle-aged women (and older)—we’re assumed to be taking a (likely self-indulgent) break. A break that isn’t entirely copacetic. People wonder whether Matt and Tristan will eat properly, and don’t I feel a little guilty? If Matt went fly-fishing in Montana for a couple of weeks, no one would wonder whether I’d be malnourished when he got back. Truth is, both Matt and Tristan are good cooks and know how to sort colors from darks and whites in the laundry room. I do not criticize the house when I return, and they don’t apologize—they have nothing to apologize for. Life goes on, and I’ll eventually find the drawer where that top ended up after coming out of the dishwasher. As I always do after a long trip, I’d scheduled a post-trip service appointment for my bike and timed my dealership arrival to miss the worst of rush hour. This allows me to avoid an extra trip to the dealership, since it’s on my way to the condo. I planned to ride-share home with my detachable luggage but Matt insisted on picking me up—which was lovely in theory, but the route from his office to the dealership is one of the city’s busiest. Sometimes we can’t do right by someone else without doing wrong by ourselves. He was late in picking me up, but I gave him grace—which, in fairness, was easy; my system always needs a few days to relearn how to belong inside a shared life, and I suspect his system feels the same. Once we pulled into the parking garage of our condo, I went on autopilot, offloading my bags and gear onto a shopping cart while Matt parked. My across-the-hall neighbor, Judy, joined us in the elevator and said how happy everyone would be to know I was home safe and sound. “Did you help your parents find a new place?” I laughed. “Long story, but the short answer is no.” The elevator stopped at our floor. “Let me catch up with myself and I’ll tell you all about it.” Judy, ever the patient one, smiled. “I’ll be right here when the time is right.” I never expected to love multifamily living, but my floormates are like sorority sisters—pitching in with an extra COVID test or a referral to a good electrician whenever the need arises. As a writer and editor, I’m very good at hunkering down, and I think I’d lose my social skills entirely if I lived in a single-family house where it would be so easy to disappear. Matt opened the door wide as I rolled the cart into the foyer. I called out,“Hey, Lovie—I’m home.” Tristan was up from the couch before I could set the brake, all grown man now but still calling me Mama. He wrapped me in his signature bear hug and held it long enough to let me know he meant it. Hard to believe I let him live to adulthood—I wouldn’t have guessed it during the tantrum years. “Let me take that back down for you,” he said, nodding toward the cart. Matt said, “I’ve got it. I know you want to check on your plants.” Matt and Tristan are gracious in the re-entry, not clingy. We’ve learned this rhythm over fifteen years—letting one another come and go. The living room, all glass and light, opens onto a balcony, where ferns, annuals and succulents spill over the railing. At first it was my garden, my place to settle when the day’s noise got too loud. But somewhere along the way it became Tristan’s too. When I travel, he keeps it alive—watering, pruning, sending me photos so we can revel in our cultivated beauty. We experienced some flora casualties in earlier trips, but I give him credit for staying the course. He had texted a picture just last week, so I wasn’t surprised to see that the giant taro—Colocasia gigantea—had thrown up three new “flowers,” the kind that look like peace lilies only supersized. We bent close to study the spadix, and a tiny anole darted between the leaves. “Ahhh,” we said in harmony. We live in a no-pet building, so we take our animal joys where we can find them. Anoles, for one. After I hauled my cargo into the proper rooms and tossed my clothes in the laundry hamper, I finally took that long-awaited shower with my own soaps and conditioner. The smell of homecoming. Years ago I decided hotel amenities were “good enough” for “helmet hair” and stopped packing my own, but standing there under familiar water pressure, I felt the small luxury of being known by my own things again. On the road, I never have to clean a tub or fold a towel—just rinse the bugs off my visor and go. Home has its comforts, but the road gives me one priceless thing: freedom from daily housekeeping. Matt and I found our way back as a couple and even slipped away for a few quiet beach days before the next family chapter began—his shark’s-tooth hunts and surf casting, my naps and wandering, both of us in sync in our own ways. Out in the world, I choose to be the unseen observer; back home, I’m a main character. In that role, I’ve worked to be less the glue that holds us together than the strand of raffia that keeps us aligned—a loose tie that allows for movement and growth without forcing the plant upright. There’s a difference between connection and control, between love as presence and love as management. These days, I practice the quieter art of letting go with love, as the saying goes. Back in Arizona, Dad was still prepping for the wedding trip east. He and Mom were sure they’d make the drive, and I believed them—mostly. We texted a few times about routes and hotel chains, and I realized I’d need to play more of a daily, on-call role once they hit the road. But first, Dad needed tech support. I didn’t want him pulling over every twenty miles to double-check the road atlas and make sure he hadn’t missed a turn. JJ and I came up with a plan. I’d text Dad a Google Map each evening with the next day’s turn directions. We looped in Bebe, who has taken a few road trips with them in a tech support role. She got him practicing with the app and reassured him: yes, the minivan’s screen would sync with his phone even without cell service, and no, he didn’t need to print out MapQuest directions “just in case.” Stagecoach was still in. Still bright-eyed. Still ready. And for now, it was the next generation carrying him forward. Once Matt and I got home from the seashore, we ate at Carter’s restaurant, a French café where he’s the lead bartender. The moment we walked in, the staff called out their greetings. The hostess smiled wide and said, “Welcome back, Mrs. Rich! How was your trip?” I hadn’t realized they’d been following the journey all along—Carter had been carrying pieces of my story into his world, and I was touched to find traces of it waiting for me there. He spotted us from behind the bar and broke into a grin. “Mom! That tan is gorgeous!” he said, coming around to give me a hug that smelled faintly of citrus peel; his cheek tasted of salt. “That’s Carter’s parents,” one of the bar patrons whispered, noting our status as minor local celebrities. For a second I saw myself through their eyes—sun-touched, self-possessed, and wholly at ease in my son’s world. The truth is, when Carter was in high school, I used to wonder what the other parents thought of us. We weren’t stellar—just determined, doing our best to stay upright through the storms. I wish I could tell that younger mother she’d make it here—that love, even imperfect, would outlast the years. Later in the evening, when the rush slowed, Carter slipped away from the bar and joined us for a few minutes. That’s when I noticed he was already wearing his wedding band. It choked me up a bit, the love he has for Katie. While I was still on the road, Carter had told me that their best-laid plans for a simple courthouse ceremony had been thwarted when they learned only two witnesses would be permitted in the judge’s chambers. They wanted intimate, but two was minuscule. Matt and I quickly offered them our condo’s garden gazebo and community room, and they took us up on it. We offered space; they kept the ceremony small. Everyone stayed in their lane. At about that point, Carter had had enough of decisions—locations, clothes, shoes, officiant costs. “Hell, I’d marry Katie by the side of the road,” he said. “Nothing else matters.” And they say romance is dead. In one of our late-night phone calls while I was on the road Matt asked what we should be doing besides offering our home. There was a time I’d have had a list: seating chart, color palette, garlands for the gazebo, maybe even a photographer to capture what I thought they’d want to remember. I came by that instinct honestly. At my own wedding, Mom orchestrated something she believed my brother and I would both cherish—JJ singing during the ceremony. She told each of us the other wanted it. Neither of us did. It was her way of pre-arranging meaning, making sure the day would carry emotional weight. We unraveled the plan in time, but the lesson lingered: sometimes love overreaches. I can’t remember how it resolved. Maybe that’s because I’ve put it in a lockbox. I’m good at that. Sitting in the café’s low lighting, admiring my handsome son, I treaded gent

    15 min
  2. JAN 11

    [Dispatch #23] Warning Signs and Warbonnets

    I left Mississippi with my grin intact. By the time I crossed into Alabama, my edges were fraying. I’d logged 1,500 miles since my last real rest in Santa Fe, continuously battling the wind. I managed to dodge the rain until the last five minutes when I turned left into the Hampton Inn on the edge of town, where I fell easily into sleep after dinner. By morning, I thought I’d found my balance again. I hadn’t. Fatigue lingers in disguise. Down in the guest lounge, the buffet attendant was overfunctioning in his attempts to connect with the bleary-eyed guests. He couldn’t read the room, and I found myself both annoyed and sorry for him. It wasn’t just his lack of confidence—it was something else. Like the volume of his friendliness was turned up too high to hear what anyone else was saying, or in my case, thinking. My family—salespeople—prized extroversion, same as American culture. Quick with a story, wired for rapport. Sure, I inherited the family charm, and I can turn it on in the right company—as I did with the nuclear engineer in Santa Fe—but it’s not my fuel. What refuels me is quieter: a good sentence, a long ride, a day where I don’t have to answer to anyone. I’ve gotten pretty savvy navigating this strain of social terrain: I started my hot tea at the table I’d chosen but didn’t sit down—that’s a trap. So is eye contact—interpreted as willingness to listen to the attendant’s story about his daughter finishing nursing school (which is exactly what happened to the feckless guest who gave off open vibes). As soon as he locked in on his mark, I made my break for the reconstituted eggs and bacon. Look, I know that feeling—the reach, the trying too hard—but I didn’t have the kindness or the time to spare that morning. Back in my room, the silence felt heavy after all that forced cheer. That’s when JJ called. My brother doesn’t sleep much, so I wasn’t surprised to get a call at seven o’clock his time. His tone was soft, but I could feel something loading behind it. This wasn’t just a check-in. “Well, I have to tell you what happened last night,” he said. JJ was waiting for Mom and Dad to come over for a family dinner, but they didn’t arrive. He kept trying to hail Dad on his phone, then Mom, to no avail. He can usually find them using Apple’s tracker, so he figured out they were at Lowe’s. An errand. (She loves squeezing in an errand). But this one took much too long. What was going on? Finally, Mom called from home to say they weren’t coming. She said she‘d just needed something for the patio garden—just a quick in-and-out at Lowe’s while Dad waited in the car. But she took his phone by mistake, disappeared into the store, lost track of time, and never found what she’d come shopping for. “She left him sitting there with no way to reach her,” he hissed. “Dad didn’t know what to do—just waited, hoping she hadn’t gotten lost or fallen or…”. JJ trailed off. “She finally came back.” That’s when his voice cracked. “Tam, she was scared. She said, ‘I don’t recognize myself sometimes.’” I don’t recognize myself sometimes. The words landed with the weight of both truth and prophecy—what she feared now, what I’d feared for years. I didn’t know what to say to that, and for a moment the whine of emotional static scrambled my thoughts. It was a dagger in my heart, clean and quiet. In my predictable avoidance pattern, I mounted up, trusting the road to work its old magic—or at least to nudge something brighter to the surface. But the thoughts clung, hovering around me like Pigpen’s dust cloud in Peanuts. By the time I rolled into Scottsboro, Alabama, early that afternoon, they were still swirling. I was running on fumes and looking for lunch, a second wind, and maybe a little mercy under the overcast sky with its (blessedly) light breezes. I’d long wanted to visit Unclaimed Baggage—the country’s only thrift store that sells the contents of lost airline luggage—but I didn’t have it in me. Not that day. I passed the corridor of chain restaurants along State Highway 79 looking for local fare--there had to be some near downtown, since Scottsboro is Jackson County’s seat, and every county courthouse I’ve ever seen has a local diner within walking distance. Where else are lawyers supposed to argue over pie before they argue in court? Three blocks later, I nearly blew through a stop sign. A big red one. Clear as day. And somehow, I didn’t see it until the last second. That’s how it starts—the slow fade between alert and autopilot. You run the same systems for too long, start cutting corners without realizing it. You tell yourself you’re fine, you’ve done this before, you’ve got muscle memory. But fatigue’s a shape-shifter. It slips in sideways and settles behind your eyes. Maybe that’s how Mom experiences it too. I stopped, barely. Pulled into a parking space just beyond the sign, hit the kill switch, and just sat there, staring at the faded white perimeters of my safe spot. By some unknown grace, the driver crossing my path had seen me coming and didn’t try to gun it. I once lost a friend to that very scenario. That’s when it hit me: the road high was gone. Not a giddy high—just that steady hum of purpose and forward motion that had carried me west, then north, then south again. What remained was the long slide down the other side: the final push east, and the re-entry zone waiting for me. In time, I forgave myself. Shook out my hands and shoulders. Coasted the few blocks into downtown, where I found what I’d been looking for: a proper local joint with an old-school Coca-Cola mural blazing across the side of a brick building. Payne’s Sandwich Shop and Soda Fountain didn’t dabble in branding—it mainlined it. The interior was a Coke-themed shrine: every square inch decked out in red-and-white kitsch from the farthest reaches of the company’s marketing imagination. I have a soft spot for anyone willing to triple-down on what matters in life—even if what matters is carbonated nostalgia and a bottle opener screwed into the counter. Places like Payne’s don’t just sell lunch and a heroic array of ice cream flavors. They sell a feeling—one bite of Americana at a time. Have a Coke and a smile. Tell yourself the myth still holds. And just for grins—why is it that Pepsi can’t hold a candle to Coke when it comes to cornering the American spirit? It apparently wins all the blind taste tests, but people still prefer Coke. My fling with chile rellenos was behind me now, and I ordered a proper Reuben—corned beef, not the pastrami pretender or, God forbid, turkey. Why restaurants think they can get away with calling something with turkey a Reuben is beyond me. That’s false advertising. Do I make myself clear? The guys to my right were business associates whose conversation had dipped into the personal. The younger one was shaky about his relationship, and the elder had thoughts. My writerly instincts usually compel me to tune in—I’m a sucker for an unexpected turn of phrase or a glimpse of vulnerability at the edge of a meal—but there was nothing here worth tuning into. The hum of my own thoughts was louder anyway. I’d had enough secondhand doubt for one day—plenty of my own to sort. I paid the bill, stepped back into the heat, and swung a leg over the bike. Time to ride. The land began to rise—an ascent that echoed the shift happening inside me. The lowland stretch of my journey, both literal and emotional, was giving way to something else: elevation. I’m not sure if the rising road lifted my spirits or just gave them permission to rise—but it felt like alignment, either way. Any rider knows that shift in elevation—not just in the road, but in the body. You get the chance to lean. A quick series of twisties here becomes switchbacks at higher elevation, then a mountain valley where Black Angus raise their heads to follow the sound of your engine. Somewhere between the ridgelines and the filtered light, the mountains were mine again. The climb is always my favorite part. Second or third gear, right in the power band, where even a slight roll of the throttle changes everything. No shifting needed—just that sweet, responsive zone where engine and intention move as one. When I hit the angles just right, the ride becomes a sentence—each curve a clause feeding the next. The exit of one flows clean into the entry of another. No corrections. No overthinking. Just lean, throttle, trust. The engine growls low and steady. The scent of the mountains drifts in and out. Nothing exists beyond the next turn—and that’s the point. When the curves finally straightened, the world returned in slow motion: traffic lights, shopfronts, the smell of barbecue smoke. Just ahead of the golden hour—which comes a little earlier in the shadow-casting mountains—I pulled into the temporary parking space at the Hampton Inn in Blue Ridge, Georgia, and there it was: just five feet in front of me, a gleaming passenger railcar bearing the warbonnet of the old Santa Fe Super Chief. The emblem belonged out west, not here in the Southern Appalachians. And yet, it fit. It wasn’t entirely out of place. My hotel sat beside a historic rail corridor known as the Hook & Eye Line—famous for sharp curves and switchbacks that once moved timber, tourists, and textiles through the Appalachians. These days, it’s a scenic rail route using vintage cars like this transplanted Super Chief. The hotel leaned into the theme with historic maps in the lobby and a rooftop bar named after the line. I took a photo without thinking—instinctively. Not because it was rare (though it was), but because it reminded me of Dad. Stagecoach had been different since I set out a month earlier. Brighter. Lighter. Maybe it was just the novelty of riding shotgun with Buckskin from afar. But I think it was

    20 min
  3. 12/14/2025

    [Dispatch #22] The Shoo-Fly Wave

    I crossed the Arkansas–Mississippi line on a long, hot stretch of two-lane and stopped at a four-pump gas station in the middle of nowhere—a place where the snack aisle leans hard toward pork rinds and Little Debbies. Three men, well past seventy-five, had hauled their aluminum lawn chairs outside the store to watch the traffic go by. A couple of younger guys—grandsons?—stood behind them in a kind of social solidarity. I pulled in under the canopy, gave them a wave, and fueled up, checked my chain lube, and grabbed a couple of dollars for a snack. As I came out, the youngest codger—flannel shirt, John Deere cap—called out, “Where ya headed?” “Ultimately home to North Carolina. But tonight, Alabama.” The men erupted in knee slaps and laughter as the youngest elbowed the oldest. “See! I told you she was headed for Alabama!” I looked at the oldest man and lowered my voice like we were in on something. “What’d you lose on that bet?” His face made it clear—he was not a betting man. So I added, “Ah. An honor bet.” He smiled with his whole face, and gave me a nod. I rolled out of the station smiling, thinking about those lawn chairs and that honor bet. It was the kind of exchange that sits right—easy, good-natured, the kind of moment that stays with you longer than you’d expect. Road magic. Not every stop goes down that easily. Later that afternoon, I pulled into a busy Exxon in Walnut, Mississippi—93 miles west of Florence, Alabama. A few Harley riders were fueling up, clearly on a group ride. I nodded, and they nodded back, as per the two-wheeled custom. The man leaning against the ice machine had plenty to say about my choice of marque. He was all warmth from the start—camouflage shirt, MAGA hat, a wire-wrapped cross on a thong around his neck. Missing a few teeth, sure, but his smile was genuine. He lit up at the sight of a woman on a motorcycle—especially one riding something unexpected. He struck me as the sort who’d rather see me on a big V-twin, but could appreciate the anomaly. “Well now,” he said, admiring the bike. “That’s a real nice Beemer. Didn’t expect to see a lady out here on one of those.” After a few friendly words I started toward the store. He added, almost like a benediction: “Well, I sure hope you got a gun somewhere on you. You need to carry.” I didn’t stop walking. Gave his shoulder a light punch—friendly enough, but firm. “No, no. We’re not talking about guns today.” He blinked, caught off guard. “What? You need a gun!” I kept it light, kept moving, waved from the glass door as I stepped inside. “It’s crazy out there,” he called after me. “You need a gun.” My refusal to talk about guns probably gave him whiplash. People assume that because I’m a woman on a motorcycle—even one in riding gear that makes me look more like an astronaut than a cowboy—I must still fit the biker-chick stereotype: tough, rebellious, dangerous, full of masculine energy that naturally includes firearms. Even on a wimpy European model instead of a big American twin, the assumption sticks. When I retell this story, people ask, “Weren’t you afraid?” No, I wasn’t. He was a man of conviction—certain that safety is a personal responsibility. And that certainty felt familiar to me. I was raised by a mother who was always attuned to the current of danger. Her parents made sure of it. They’d each learned to read danger in their own way—the hard way. Her mother, Mamaw, didn’t finish high school—hardly anyone in the coal camp did—but she had a head for numbers and a nose for when someone was getting cheated. Neighbors brought her their pay stubs and bank statements to see if the math lined up. It often didn’t. While Mamaw’s mind was her weapon, Papaw leaned on physical readiness. He trained himself to write with his left hand, just in case he needed his right to protect one of us. The penmanship drills were sweet, a little dramatic, and everyone understood the good intentions behind them. It’s no surprise Mom took that instinct of protecting one’s own and ran with it. When I was in high school, Mom trained to become a police officer. She enrolled at the community college, bought a gun before it was fashionable, and turned out to be a crack shot from the start. To hear her tell it, she even out-shot a deputy sheriff on the range. Dad tried talking her out of a career in law enforcement, but Papaw was the big gun. She gave his opinion the final say, and when he warned her about bad guys coming after cops’ families she stepped back. I think that decision left a crack she never fully sealed. It’s probably why she went civilian vigilante. Eventually—in her late forties or early fifties—she turned her passion to karate and earned a black belt. Before long, she was teaching self-defense classes to women. When my boys were little and stayed at Grammyland, she made sure they took lessons too. Somewhere along the way, her self-defense training made her an evangelist for the square-handled ice pick—not the round kind, mind you; too slippery if you meet your mark. She explained, “You want one with edges, so it doesn’t spin loose if it gets… messy.” There’s one of them in every room of her house. Just in case. Her readiness always felt theatrical—like she was preparing for a scene that hadn’t started yet. It was Mom’s way of claiming control in a world that rarely handed it over freely—especially to women. She wasn’t waiting to be rescued. She was ready to do the rescuing, and one time she even did so at a big box store. From out in the parking lot, Mom saw a shoplifter shove past the teenage security guards. Then in her sixties, she dropped her bags, hustled Mamaw into the car, and sprinted back to the entry apron behind the bollards—where the rent-a-cop was flailing. She pinned the thief to the tarmac with a knee to his shoulders—and used what I’ve always called the Vulcan Death Grip near his neck. She had a real name for the move, but I never remembered it. “Death Grip” fits her style. That might be why she never corrects me when I tell the story. Nothing lights her up like the chance to go full vigilante. The older I get, the more I recognize the logic in her intensity. It was her version of safety. Her version of love. What she did was about staying ready—safe, in control. She moved through the world ready for it to turn on her. I admire her decisiveness—how instinct took over, how fast she moved. But we trained our instincts in different directions. What I do is about staying open. Present. Connected. I move through it hoping it will change me. But what about that ponytail holder I picked up back in Amarillo, the one with tiny plastic guns sitting in little tooled-leather holsters? I wasn’t drawn to it as a weapon; I was drawn to the contradiction of being a young girl with guns in her hair. Even then, safety and danger were braided together in ways I didn’t fully understand. Now, this might surprise you, but I actually agree with the gun guy on one point: it is a shitshow out there. But that word means different things depending on who’s saying it—and what they fear. These days, we’re all using the same vocabulary to describe completely different realities. That’s the real danger: thinking we’re talking about the same thing. I stay wary too—just not about what he’s worried about. Maybe that’s why today I ride alert—aware of the energy in a room, along a roadside, in a man. I don’t say what I’m carrying. Let them wonder. People call us both badass—my mother for her martial arts, me for riding solo cross-country. But what we do—and why we do it—comes from different places. She stays ready. I stay open. And if anything edges too close—including weaponry—I give it the shoo-fly-wave with a breezy grin. Get full access to Narrative Mileage with Tamela Rich at tamelarich.substack.com/subscribe

    11 min
  4. 12/07/2025

    [Dispatch #21] Pretty Disreputable, Apparently

    Become a free subscriber and you’ll never miss a thing. Two hours after I left the person I’ve come to call “Jaguar man,” I outran the storm that had chased me all day and rolled into Norman, Oklahoma. The sky had cleared, but the unease lingered—what I’d shaken off in weather still clung in thought. Pulling under the hotel canopy as the light shifted to gold, I could see at least three decent restaurants within walking distance. After days of eating what Mom always called “starch bloat,” I was ready for real food—hard-core greens, no cheese, no fryer oil. The lobby’s air-conditioning hit me first—sharp and sterile after the plains. As I took off my helmet, the young woman behind the front desk, braid swinging, face lighting up like she’d spotted a long-lost friend cried out: “Oh! You’re a fellow motorcyclist.” I smiled at her phrasing and gave her her due. “Yes, I am. What do you ride?” Without hesitation, she pulled out her phone and flipped open the photo app. Beaming, she held up a picture of a Kawasaki Ninja. “My boyfriend’s bringing it home for me tonight. It was his brother-in-law’s and he just got a bigger bike. I can’t wait!” Her excitement was contagious, even after a long day on the road. Instead of lamenting high winds, drivers who texted at 75 mph, and road grime, I leaned into her joy. “Is this your first?” She nodded, practically bouncing. “Yes! I just passed my motorcycle endorsement and I’ve been riding his around in parking lots. I can’t wait to ride my own!” Another guest came through the sliding doors, snapping her back into employee mode. But in between key-charging and data entry, she asked where I’d been and where I was headed. “Oh, someday I’d love to take a trip like that,” she said wistfully. “Then promise yourself you will,” I told her. “Make it happen.” Upstairs, I took a hot shower, rinsing off the grit of the plains, and opened my email. There was a long, thoughtful note from Stephanie waiting—updates on her latest draft. I told her I’d look at the pages after dinner and we scheduled a call for the next morning. Then my brother called. “You’re not going to believe this,” he said. “Mom and Dad decided they’re driving to Carter’s wedding.” “What? I thought they were flying.” “Nope. The way they put it was—hang on—‘This will be our last big road trip.’ And they want to follow your route back east. Your exact route. Even La Posada in Santa Fe.” There was a kind of poetry in that—and perhaps a kind of peril, too. Part of me was moved—Dad had been so engaged, tracking my progress, asking about the roads and the weather. And Mom, well, she wanted to bring a box of family mementos along so she could watch us unwrap it like kids on our birthdays. JJ said they were happy, even energized, by the idea of being back on the road. But another part of me hesitated. My mind flashed to that moment near Panhandle, Texas—when the U-Haul brakes failed to disengage the cruise control on the exit ramp. Would their past catch up to them on the open road? And would I know—really know—when it was time to take the keys away? We had talked about that one day in Phoenix, JJ, Dad, Mom, and I on their spacious patio with the overhead fan whirring. Between the two of us, JJ and I called it the “omnibus aging conversation,” where we gently brought up everything from medical power of attorney to long-term driving plans. We’d been calm, collaborative, full of love. JJ was the one who brought up driving. Dad volunteered: “Oh yes, someday we won’t be able to drive. We know that.” Mom nodded along—it was that kind of afternoon for her. But “someday” is a slippery word. It lives safely in theory—until it doesn’t. I could almost hear the word surface, like a buoy rising through water. Alongside the warmth I felt—the sweetness of their reversal from “We’re done road-tripping” to a two-week trek east—came a ripple of dread. My body registered it before my brain did: a clench behind the ribs, a subtle tilt toward caution. I didn’t want to be the killjoy, so I stayed quiet. Someday had just arrived. And in the back of my mind, the Greek chorus began again—soft but insistent:Sometimes, something tragic happens. The next day on the road was uneventful, other than passing through Johnny Bench’s hometown of Binger, Oklahoma. I didn’t stop to tour the museum. I rolled into Hot Springs in the late afternoon, grateful that the boring part of the trip was behind me. I should mention that I rarely make room reservations in advance and with few exceptions, this has worked perfectly. It gives me the flexibility to duck in early for weather or extend the day. But I never even considered that Hot Springs had a casino and a racetrack, so imagine my shock when, on a Saturday night, every brand-name chain was full, and even the motor lodges’ neon signs glowed “No Vacancy.” I wasn’t about to take my chances on the sketchy ones—flickering fluorescent lights, curtains that didn’t close, parking lots with too many loiterers and too few lights. Not tonight. I had plenty of options to the east, so I rode on. The moment reminded me of a night years ago in North Dakota, when I didn’t have an option. I’d planned to reach Montana before nightfall, but a storm was building west of Dickinson. I pulled into a gas station to check the skies and figure out my next move. A local man inside—one of those guys with real-time radar access and an easy authority—told me I should stay put. “There’s nowhere to stay,” I said, staring. He shrugged. “I know a place.” He called to a 12-room motel up the road and told them a solo rider might need a room—or a patch of grass for her tent. In those days I always carried a tent. The place was across from a row of silos and a grain elevator, and my first instinct was suspicion. Meth lab? I told myself to settle down. Don’t be such a city slicker, Tam. The woman who ran the place was funny and warm. She brought ice cubes from her own kitchen and sat with me outside while the sky settled. As we talked, she told stories about trying to keep hunters from cleaning game in their rooms—said she finally had to put up a sign that read, “No cleaning game in your room!” I should’ve taken a picture of it. But I was too busy feeling grateful. The room was newly redone, the mattress soft, and the storm passed without a drop. I slept like a baby. So why didn’t I take a chance on one of the more colorful joints in Hot Springs? The honest answer? I still had options in Arkansas, where I didn’t in North Dakota. And maybe there’s a deeper answer, too—something reptilian. I trust the dodginess of a 12-room motel in the middle of grain country more than the same setup in a city with a vice economy. I’d like to think I’m above that kind of bias. I’m not. An hour later, I found a Holiday Inn Suites within a bustling shopping center and had already identified my restaurant before I checked in. For the second time in a few days, after asking if they had a vacancy for one night, the desk clerk looked me over and said,“Yes, but we’re expensive.” Twice in one week—that was new. In all my years on the road, no one had ever felt the need to warn me I might not belong. How disreputable can an old broad like me really be? Pretty disreputable, apparently. And deeply reputable in other ways—reliable, watchful, practiced in the art of showing up. I’ve earned my reputation through miles and weather, through work done well and people cared for. It’s not always visible at first glance—but then again, most durable things aren’t. The desk clerk, it turned out, was a doll. Once she realized I could swing the rate, she took me under her wing and did her best to retrieve my not-so-frequently-used rewards number. I couldn’t hold a thing against her. I took the room, ate another salad, and felt the fatigue set in. Later, after returning from the restaurant, I called down to let her know there was a big puddle of water in the elevator. She sighed. “Those little league families…” Get full access to Narrative Mileage with Tamela Rich at tamelarich.substack.com/subscribe

    11 min
  5. 11/30/2025

    [Dispatch #20] Two Loads and a Long Road

    I left Canyon in the late morning since I had to wait for the final remnants of the storm to clear. Somewhere east of Amarillo, the crosswind hit me sideways. A steady push, not gusty—almost like it had intent. I gritted my teeth, leaned hard, and watched a truck in the distance rock and settle—like it had reconsidered its loyalties. As the highway straightened near a sign for Panhandle, Texas, a different kind of memory broke loose, one that everyone in my family has tried to forget. Back in 2020, five years before this ride, I was standing in my kitchen in North Carolina, mid-dinner prep, when my phone buzzed. Mom’s name on the screen. I wiped my hands and answered brightly, trying to summon good news. “We sold both of the houses over the weekend,” she said. At that time, my parents had owned two homes, one in Ohio and another in Las Vegas, and the real estate market that summer moved like quicksilver. “Wow,” I said. “When do you have to be out?” “That’s the problem,” she replied. “Las Vegas closes in three weeks. Ohio closes in five.” What followed was a month of chaos—of scrambling to close out two lives in two places, so they could consolidate it all in their new Arizona house—the one that wasn’t quite finished. I pushed my editorial deadlines ahead, rented the largest SUV available at the airport, and made one last pilgrimage to Ohio. I’d done that drive a hundred times since leaving in 1982, but this would be the last time my parents would meet me at the other end of the road. I pulled into the driveway five days later, half-expecting to see the house as stripped down inside as the front yard now looked without the giant Norway maple where our last family photo had been staged. No such luck, I would soon learn. My dad—his Johnny-Carson good looks now dulled by exhaustion—dragged a full garbage tote to the curb. “You’ve got to help your mother get rid of stuff,” he said. “I’m not gonna rent a storage unit in Arizona.” Mom’s not a hoarder; she’s a preservationist with a militant sense of order. She’d long warned us, “Don’t part with any of this. It’ll be worth more than memories one day.” I was never sure about that—nothing in her collection looked like the treasures that fetched stratospheric prices on Antiques Roadshow. I decided to just fill the SUV with whatever she wanted me to have and deal with it later. Out of sight, out of mind. The house wasn’t the one I’d grown up in, but it was full of echoes. With each move, Mom had culled what no longer pleased her and carefully boxed what she believed would one day hold value: Heisey glass, Occupied Japan figurines, and a chalkware Catholic monk that exhaled incense through its mouth—a novelty that peaked in the mid-’70s, alongside fondue pots and macramé owls. My friend Jill came from Akron the next day. She had no attachment to any of it and showed me how to start listing furniture on Facebook Marketplace. Mom was scandalized by the prices. “It’s worth more than that!” “Turn this around, Mom. People are paying you to haul this off.” Dad grinned. “Yeah, this is good business!” She didn’t admit defeat, not exactly. But I could feel her letting go—if not of the objects themselves, then of the need to be right about their worth. The woman who’d spent decades making things happen—clipping poodles, selling Decorama, running an ice cream shop, building an insurance agency with my dad—finally stepped into the passenger seat. I took the wheel, wondering how long I’d get to hold it before my own sons reached for it. Dad had hired one moving company for Las Vegas and another for Ohio. Somehow, the infamous Victorian sleigh squeaked in as the last item the movers’ van could accommodate. I’d done my part by hauling a load home to North Carolina in an overstuffed SUV—but it still wasn’t enough to make a proper dent in the volume. A few days later, they rolled out of Ohio in a two-car convoy: Dad in a rented 26 foot U-Haul, Mom behind him in the Sienna van, carrying what couldn’t fit in the other vehicles—and the quiet weight of six decades, packed with care. That’s how they ended up in Panhandle, Texas. They’d exited for gas near a Love’s Truck Stop, and something went wrong with the U-Haul. The cruise control didn’t disengage, the exit ramp curved too hard, and the load was too high and too heavy. Mom, in the van behind him, saw it happen: the truck tipped, skidded, and slid—on its side—for at least 70 yards before coming to a stop. Ten feet more and he’d have hit the steel poles holding up the Love’s sign. She thought she was witnessing his death. As she walked toward the wreck, bracing for the worst, she later told me that a small woman of Asian descent appeared—out of nowhere—and said, calmly, “He’s going to be okay.” Whether it was an angel, a bystander, or an apparition doesn’t matter. In that moment, she believed it. And it steadied her. Every time she retells the story, it includes this vital detail. Truckers raced over from the diesel bays, volunteer first responders in ball caps and reflective vests. They smashed the windshield to get my dad out. Dad’s life must have flashed before his eyes—mine did, just hearing the story. Dad’s life must have flashed before his eyes—mine did, just hearing the story. I didn’t see the slide, but I saw the video Mom took of the recovery. I watched it more than once—not out of morbid curiosity, but because some part of me needed to believe the ending. To witness the outcome. To reassure myself that he really was okay. They both walked away with bruises, mostly the emotional type—a fact that still feels impossible to me. Within days they were back behind the wheel, tracing the same desert routes as if muscle memory could outdrive time. It was like they filed the UHaul wreck away under “close call” and kept moving. Maybe they kept moving because stopping—really stopping—would’ve meant reckoning with all the ways their lives were shifting. The crash should’ve been a reckoning, but for Dad it was another near-miss folded into the narrative of luck. He’s always believed that if you just keep moving, the road will clear. After all, every miracle has a half-life. I’ve never stopped admiring their grit. It’s just harder now, watching that same grit turn inward, against the tide. Mom still drives, but it’s no longer a given that she’ll remember where she’s headed—or who’s with her. Once, she pulled away from a rest stop while Dad was still in the bathroom. She came back. But what if she hadn’t? What if he’d left his phone in the van? There are too many variables now. Scary math. Dad doesn’t watch her every move. Nobody can, and she’d pick up on the surveillance if they did. So he fades out, sometimes, to a place where he doesn’t have to think about what might go wrong. YouTube is his codependent. We used to joke about my great-grandfather—Dad’s Grandpa White. We called him Mr. Magoo, after the old cartoon character who wandered through construction zones with a walking stick and bowler hat, blissfully unaware of the danger around him. Nearsighted to the point of farce, but somehow, everything always worked out. As Dad ages, I see more of that in him too. He’s not oblivious; he’s selective. He has a gift—or maybe a curse—for ignoring unpleasant things until they resolve on their own. Once he does see something and it lands, though? He can be like a dog with a bone. A sleeping giant, wide awake. For all my talk about being an observant little girl, I have that Magoo quality too. When it comes to uncomfortable truths right in front of me, I tell myself I’m watching the long arc, when it’s really a form of denial. That’s probably why I ignored all the early signs of Mom and Dad’s aging. Not because I didn’t care, but because I didn’t want it to be true. I kept looking down the road, convinced there would be more time. More clarity. More warning. That’s the Magoo way, after all—blind luck and forward motion. Trying to stay present doesn’t always mean taking charge. Sometimes it just means letting the blurry bits come into focus—and resisting the urge to squint past them. Easier said than done. By the time I crossed back into my own lane of the present, the road had stretched into an endless gray ribbon, wind tugging at my sleeves again. Seventy-five miles east of the infamous Panhandle truck stop, I stopped at the Mesquite Canyon Steakhouse—a joint that’s survived since the Eisenhower era and plans to outlive us all. I ordered the Texas Tater and took a seat at a resin-coated table embedded with cowboy poetry and old postcards. The table itself felt like a time capsule. I was torn between two motivations: one, to get back on the road and outrun the rain I’d seen gathering on the radar; the other, to linger and let my meal convert to heat. Looking at Google Maps, expediency won. I didn’t want to be caught in what was coming—a cold front in the rain is the worst kind of motorcycle misery. I can ride in cold. I can ride in drizzle. But riding in both, when the wind cuts through every layer and the road loses traction? It burrows into my spine and doesn’t leave. I geared up, paid my bill, and went out to the bike. I hadn’t mounted up yet; instead, I turned the bike with my body toward the gravel lot’s exit to give me a straight shot for the road. A not-so-late-model Jaguar sedan pulled in behind me, angled so the driver could speak to me directly through his window. He was probably in his fifties, sharply dressed in a fitted green t-shirt, wearing a good bit of jewelry on his hands and neck. Not dusty, not down-and-out; he’d probably showered that morning. But his voice—East Coast, New York state or thereabouts—carried tension under the polish. “Are you local?” he asked. “I need to find a ti

    17 min
  6. 11/23/2025

    [Dispatch #19] Murals, Rail Lines, and a Rattlesnake Under Glass

    Buckskin Rides Again is FREE! Subscribe so you don’t miss a thing If you remember Pixar’s Cars movie (2006), you’ll remember Radiator Springs—the dusty little town bypassed by the interstate, fading until someone slowed down long enough to see its charm. Tucumcari, New Mexico, isn’t Radiator Springs exactly, but Pixar clearly had places like it in mind. The town wears the same stubborn hope, its civic pride painted straight onto stucco. More than a hundred murals brighten Main Street and back alleys—cowboys, longhorns, diners, the ghosts of Route 66 motels. They may look spontaneous, but most are part of a plan. Murals declare: We were here. We mattered. We still do. And they whisper: Please stop and spend a little money. As life gets faster, meaner, more expensive, and more extractive, nostalgia becomes our refuge—and our trap. Maybe that’s why the murals got to me: they weren’t just decoration; they were defense. Don’t just take my word for it—sociologists have tracked the same trend. It’s a global reflex: vinyl records in Europe, Mao-era kitsch in China, vintage Vespa cafés in Vietnam. But in the U.S., nostalgia is baked right into capitalism; it’s one of our most infectious exports. We don’t just remember—we monetize. The American model turns memory into experience, and experience into product. We brand the past so we can buy it back. And nobody does that better than Disney. As a connoisseur of roadside kitsch (including murals) Tucumcari was a must-see. I doubt my family ever stopped there, and if we did, mural tourism hadn’t yet been invented. In the late ‘60s early ‘70s we were after comfort, not nostalgia. And comfort was hit-or-miss, with air conditioning more conceptual than real. I remember the metal water barrels along the loneliest stretches of Route 66 in Arizona, New Mexico, and west Texas—set out to keep cars from overheating, or to revive them after they had. Drivers could ladle water into their radiators or leave jugs for the next traveler. Some barrels were tended by local agencies, others by the kindness of strangers. Mamaw and Papaw took jobs where they could find them, based largely on the advice of other family members, some of whom had settled in California. Somewhere in my family’s archives is a story about Papaw rigging his own version of roadside mercy for the car—an evaporative cooler strapped to the passenger window, burlap-lined and fed by a leaking water bladder. The store-bought versions, often Firestone or Thermador, used balsa shavings or porous pads, but Papaw was handy and broke, so he built his own. Unlike some of his jury-rigged contraptions (of which there were dozens), this one actually worked—long enough to make the desert a little more bearable. Maybe those barrels—and Papaw’s homemade cooler—were the real Radiator Springs: proof that strangers and tinkerers once looked out for each other on the long, hot road. If I’d pulled into town an hour earlier, I’d have had time to tour the Tucumcari Railroad Museum, housed in the old Santa Fe depot—white stucco, red tile roof, and a long row of arched windows that still catch the late sun just right. Instead, I idled at the depot fence, watching freight cars shimmer past in the heat—steady and indifferent, just like they were when this town mattered to travelers. Echoes from the paternal past That rail line is where my dad’s family history starts to echo. His mother’s family—the Whites—followed the Santa Fe west from Fort Madison, Iowa, to Barstow, California. My grandmother’s parents made that journey too. Her mother, my great-grandmother White, died in her fifties of what they then called “sugar diabetes,” a term that sounds folksy now. Her strong genes show up in both my grandmother and Dad—the same almond-shaped eyes, the same wide smile that still turns up in family photos. Dad reminded me of that illness, a little wistfully, when we were learning to monitor his glucose. He believed his grandmother probably had access to insulin by then, but working-class women didn’t always get timely care—especially in desert towns like Barstow. On Dad’s father’s side—the Cummins side—there’s a different kind of legacy. I recall seeing a photo of me and my brother standing beside our great-grandfather Cummins in Iowa. He stayed put in Fort Madison, where the Santa Fe built one of the first railroad bridges across the Mississippi and helped turn the town into a major rail hub. Great-grandpa Cummins worked as a Santa Fe Railroad detective—part cowboy, part lawman, part company enforcer. His job was to ride the line, settle disputes, protect cargo, and put down unionization efforts. If you’re my age—or a connoisseur of vintage cartoons—you probably remember that old Looney Tunes series with Ralph Wolf and Sam Sheepdog. Ralph trying to steal the sheep, Sam thwarting him at every turn. But come noon, they shared a sandwich. And at five, they punched the clock and walked home together like old friends. I imagine that’s how my great-grandfather—the Santa Fe special agent—felt about the other side of the family, his in-laws. They followed the rails west to Barstow, read contract language like scripture, and stood firm with the union. Still, they all worked the same line—just from opposite sides of the track. Dad never said much about the divide—railroad detective on one side, union men on the other. But by the time I was coming up in the ’70s, when union-busting was gaining traction as the national sport, I could sense his angle. He gave the stink-eye to slowdowns and “not pitching in.” He respected grit more than grievance, but he never mounted his high horse. Mom would’ve weighed in. She’s always believed in law and order—but she also roots for the underdog. I used to think those instincts were at odds. Now I think she gave her allegiance to whoever deserved it—a case-by-case call based on circumstance and character. Where do I fall on that spectrum? For starters, I have an MBA, which means I’ve read the anti-union case studies. I was raised to believe in effort, not excuses—and I still do. But somewhere along the way, my compass shifted. These days, I side with the union by default and I’m rarely convinced otherwise. The wildcat strikes and sabotage I remember from the ’70s are gone, which makes it easier. It’s hard not to root for people who organize for something better. Who take risks. Who do the slow work of community-building. What I’ve come to admire most are the unions that form quietly, without theatrics—movements of caretakers rather than combatants. Take the 43,000 home-based daycare providers in California—mostly women of color, running child care businesses out of their homes. Technically independent. Chronically underpaid. Routinely overlooked. In 2019, they voted to unionize. Two years later, they secured a contract with the state: 20% raises, retirement and health funds, and—most important—formal recognition of their work. No wildcat strikes. No sugar in gas tanks. Just organizing, lobbying, and showing up. It worked. It changed lives. Stories like that help me keep the faith. That’s why I still believe in solidarity. Because I’ve seen too many people do everything right and still get steamrolled. Because I’ve spent enough time as a freelancer to know what it means to get stiffed—and to rely on my spouse for that most American of luxuries: health insurance. Small-Town Solidarity Tucumcari tried solidarity once. When the federal interstate plans were announced, highway officials insisted that bypasses guaranteed prosperity. Locals didn’t buy it. Mayors, merchants, and ordinary residents linked arms to protect their one dependable economy: the slow, steady stream of Route 66 travelers. Like so many workers I’ve known, they weren’t fighting modernity—they were fighting disposability. Solidarity became their only strategy, though even solidarity rarely stops the kind of progress that’s already been promised to someone else. Sometimes collective action buys time; sometimes it becomes the record of who refused to disappear. Either way, solidarity is always an argument against erasure. I ate a chile relleno in a small café downtown, turning over how solidarity is still needed today—though the battleground has shifted. It’s no longer fought primarily through labor unions or factory gates, but through whatever means a community can muster to stay viable in this new, 21st Century Gilded Age. Leaving Tucumcari, I eventually had to merge onto I-40—the very interstate that siphoned travelers away and starved the motels and cafés I had just spent the afternoon admiring. I-40 hummed like a future I might’ve welcomed once, dazzled by the promise of growth and jobs. But I’ve lived long enough to recognize the echoes—the same breathless claims now made by tech bros promising AI data centers, endless prosperity, and somehow endless water. The bypass didn’t just reroute traffic; it rerouted identity, economy, and time. But, like time itself, the wind never stops; it only changes direction and velocity. Weather systems move, and I moved with them. Skipping The Big Texan Steak Ranch I set my course for Canyon, Texas, deliberately avoiding Amarillo—not only because it’s bigger, louder, and paved with parking lots, but because I’ve been there before. Many times, back in my original Buckskin days. Stagecoach and Running Deer always stopped for dinner at the Big Texan Steak Ranch in Amarillo, home of the infamous 72-ounce steak challenge. Eat the whole thing—steak, roll, salad, shrimp cocktail, baked potato—in under an hour, and it’s free. Even as a kid, I couldn’t stand the spectacle. The eating theatrics are a blur—but I never forgot the gift shop. That’s where I found it: a ponytail holder with tiny plastic pistols in tooled leather holsters. I still h

    17 min
  7. 11/16/2025

    [Dispatch #18] Strong Backs, Circling Minds

    Missed a Dispatch? They’re all right here. It took me a bit longer than expected to get out of Santa Fe. I’d meant to tip the housekeeper but realized too late that I was down to thirty-five dollars in cash to get from New Mexico to North Carolina. I spent most of the morning trying to get money without an ATM card ( I don’t travel with one)—discovering, belatedly, that banks don’t really do cash advances anymore. When I finally found one that did, my card wasn’t on the right network. I’m officially a relic of another age. I left with a guilty conscience for stiffing the housekeeper, but figured it would be just my luck to hit a gas station or diner without network service, and I wasn’t about to risk it. I told myself I’d repay the debt somewhere down the road. Still, I couldn’t stop thinking about the imbalance—the same one that keeps widening everywhere. My small lapse in tipping the housekeeper felt like a crack in a larger system. Work deserves pay that covers rent and groceries—that’s just basic dignity. I hate tip culture. Wage and dignity still travel together elsewhere in the world; we’re the ones who keep separating them. With that on my mind and only thirty-five dollars in my pocket, I turned back to the road. Less than an hour away was Glorieta Pass, site of the last major battle of the Civil War in the New Mexico Territory. Other than a brown highway marker, I couldn’t find much evidence from the road that anything out of the ordinary had ever taken place there. I’d been looking for a battlefield; I found a throughline instead. Corridors and Conscience At Pecos National Historical Park, an ever-helpful ranger told me how to find the general area of the battle “if you really try—but you’d have to know what you’re looking at.” I didn’t try. What I was looking for wasn’t coordinates but continuity. I was more interested in what endures than what was lost. Inside the park’s exhibit halls, the story wasn’t war but passage—centuries of travelers sharing the same corridor: Pueblo traders, Spanish missionaries, Anglo soldiers, the Santa Fe Trail, the railroad, Route 66, I-25. One road stacked upon another. My own eastward ride felt like claiming an inheritance. As I left the park, the skies were overcast, and the wind vexed me. I was traveling between 7,500 to 8,000 feet, where cold wind and stunted piñon-juniper and ponderosa forests dominate. (Back home, Mount Mitchell, North Carolina, peaks at 6,684 feet.) The cold and thin air cast a shadow over my spirits as I left the high-altitude remnants of the Southern Rockies, headed again toward the flat plains for what I assumed would be a couple of dull travel days before reaching the Southern Appalachians. Then—boom—the land fell away to reveal the Pecos River Valley, a long, erosion-carved corridor where the highlands yielded to the Great Plains. Broad, sweeping passes opened one after another—sheer mesa walls above, an unexpected valley floor below. I dropped from the mountain zone to basin-and-range foothills, skimming the edge of the Raton-Clayton Volcanic Field farther east. I was in a worn-down portion of the Great Plains margin, riding atop layers that were once near-shore seabeds, laid down ~250 million years ago. I hadn’t expected such beauty; there wasn’t a hint of green on Google Maps to warn me. I don’t know if my eyes or my lungs were happier during those miles. Within thirty minutes, I was unzipping my jacket collar to feel the breeze. Whew. Oasis and Inheritance By the time the road leveled near Trementina—around 5,500 feet—I’d surrendered the mountains. What came next was pure high plains: windblown, wide open, and suddenly interrupted by water. The Conchas River cuts a gorge through the land, forming a surprise oasis: low cliffs, wide water, a fringe of green. The dam here was built in the 1930s—not for profit, but for public good. One of thousands under the WPA, it helped reshape the American landscape. The ethos rang familiar. This was the kind of work my grandfather—Papaw—did during the Great Depression, laying stone in Kentucky with the Civilian Conservation Corps. He was the fourth child of twelve and his paycheck was $30 a month—$25 of it sent straight home. That split might not fly with teens today—maybe not even with labor law. But it fed his family, and it helped shape a country that once believed in shared work and shared reward. I wouldn’t be here without the CCC. The thought brought me back to Hot Springs and those grand old bathhouses—another relic of a Progressive Era that valued public health, beauty, and structure. Somewhere along the way, we decided income was the prerequisite for healing. If a new CCC were proposed now, it would probably need a corporate sponsor and a media campaign to justify itself. We don’t build for the public good anymore. We still spend public money—but only if there’s a ribbon-cutting, a sponsor logo, a photo op in hard hats. Otherwise, good luck. Even now, Congress jockeys for political cover while dismantling the very systems that once held families like mine together—families who survived only because those programs existed. America has gone beyond austerity for the poor and fallen straight into social murder. Not metaphorically, but structurally. When a government withdraws food, shelter, and healthcare from the vulnerable while protecting the powerful, that is not neutral policy—it’s murder, written into law. The Shape of Their Labor My grandfather’s legacy was built with stone and sweat. I always think of him doing something outdoors, even though he had a civil service job. His real love was animals, and husbandry was his other full-time occupation. Calving and planting hay and straw in spring, then harvesting alfalfa and Timothy continuously from early summer through October. Year-round repairs. Always in motion. The torch passed quietly from stone to spirit. My mother’s labor was of a different kind, but like her father, she was always in motion. She labored by force of will—physically and socially. Always scanning for what could be improved—made more useful, beautiful, meaningful. Mom saw the world as something to be elevated, and she carried that mission like a calling. They each labored in their own way—Papaw with his hands, Mom with her convictions. Papaw’s bridges are probably still standing, and Mom’s convictions live on in her descendants. I labor too, but mine is quieter: the work of noticing, of pattern and meaning. I don’t shape stone or command a room; I gather what’s overlooked and thread it into stories that hold. Maybe that’s why I sense the subtle changes first—the flickers in Mom’s recall, the gentle fray in her precision. I don’t want to see it, but I do. It strikes me that tending the mind—our own or another’s—is invisible but relentless work. Speaking of the mind, Papaw died from complications of Alzheimer’s, and my mother has always said that’s her worst fear for anyone she loves. I used to think she meant the heartbreak of watching someone disappear. But now I think she fears being the one who vanishes—who loses her edge, her authority, her grip on the story. She’s never been quick to say, “I don’t remember.” If the details slipped, she often filled them in with what she believed should have happened—what aligned with her values or her sense of justice. The version she told became the version. Not to deceive, but because the world should run a certain way—and someone had to hold the line. What I Carry One moment stands out—a story she’s told many times, and always in the same way: my high school club hazing. In 1978, club initiations were just thinly veiled abuse that you tolerated so you could dish it out as an upperclassman. Mom was furious when she found out about one of the initiation requirements. She marched into the school, confronted the gym teacher who sponsored the club, and then the principal who had looked the other way. Of course, I was mortified. What teenager wants their mother barging into school, making a scene? Even though Mom was right—which I couldn’t see then—I didn’t want reform. I just wanted to survive the week unscathed. In her telling, she got the teacher fired—with thanks from the principal for standing up to cruelty. That’s not what happened; they both retired years later. But in Mom’s mind, she had taken a stand and won. Her version wasn’t anchored in fact so much as justice—the story she needed to be true. For years I told it differently, too—my version focused on the embarrassment, not the courage. Looking back now, I see the shape of her loyalty. Fierce, public, and unyielding. But I also see how much it meant to her to be the one who knew what to do. To not just protect her children, but to be recognized for doing it well. I sometimes think Mom and I share the same internal siren, tuned to injustice but calibrated differently. Hers goes off at the sight of a bad actor, mine at the sound of a bad system. She likes to be the hands of retribution—swift, decisive, righteous. I’m slower. I build my case, try to understand what produced the mess before I touch it. The only time I move first and think later is when an animal’s in trouble. Then instinct wins every time. These days, when something she considers important escapes her, I can see Mom wrestle with it—her mind reaching, her words circling, pride trying to hold steady. This isn’t just about trying to stay organized; she’s trying to stay legible to herself—to keep the story straight so the world still makes moral sense. I recognize the gesture in myself—small hesitations, the wrong word arriving just ahead of the right one. This prelude of the inevitable isn’t alarming—yet. It’s just a faint draft that wasn’t there before. It’s enough to make me wonder if the drift begins this quietly. Do

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About

At sixty-three, Tamela Rich—aka “Buckskin”—set off solo on her motorcycle for a cross-country ride: 4,820 miles through eleven states and decades of family memory. Along the way, she encounters a host of road-trip characters—from gas-station prophets and drivers hauling questionable cargo to park rangers and old men making honor bets. Buckskin Rides Again is not just a ride across America. It’s a journey through the deeper lines laid down by family, history, and time. tamelarich.substack.com