Car Ride Conversations For Sports Families

Valerie Alston
  • 4.8 (13)
  • Sports
  • Updated Weekly

The ultimate podcast for parents, coaches, and youth sport athletes who want to unlock the secrets to mental toughness, confidence, and resilience. Whether you're on your way to practice, a big game, or just tackling the daily grind, these bite-sized episodes are designed to spark meaningful conversations to equip young athletes with actionable tools to thrive in school, sports and life while building strong relationships with their parents, one car ride at a time. Hosted by Valerie Alston, former D1 athlete, sport psychology expert, and resilience coach, each episode dives into key topics like building effective self-talk, staying calm under pressure, and bouncing back from setbacks. With real-life stories, practical tips, and relatable insights, you'll discover how to support your youth sport athlete's journey while strengthening your connection along the way. Buckle up and join us for a ride full of inspiration, growth, and the skills needed to become Confident, Calm, and Clutch! Questions? Comments? Ideas? ✉️ Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me On: 📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching ▶️ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 ✨ For exclusive tips, tools, and updates, join my newsletter: 📬 https://www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter

  1. Memorial Day Lessons: Courage, Resilience, and Gratitude from America's Heroes

    6d ago

    Memorial Day Lessons: Courage, Resilience, and Gratitude from America's Heroes

    Memorial Day Lessons for Young Athletes: Resilience, Purpose & Gratitude In this Memorial Day episode of Car Ride Conversations for Sports Families, host Valerie Alston reflects on honoring fallen service members and shares lessons she’s learned from 18 years working alongside Army soldiers that apply to young athletes. She explains that resilience isn’t the absence of struggle but the ability to expect challenges, prepare for them, and keep moving forward, and she emphasizes connecting to a purpose bigger than yourself as a key driver of endurance in tough times. Valerie highlights gratitude as a perspective shift—appreciating opportunities, relationships, and sacrifices that make sports possible—and encourages athletes to honor others’ sacrifices through effort, character, and respect. The episode closes with Memorial Day reflection prompts and conversation questions for families about courage, appreciation, growth through challenges, purpose, and ways to honor a fallen service member. 00:00 Memorial Day Meaning 00:43 Welcome And Mission 01:15 Why This Day Matters 02:09 Resilience Through Struggle 06:14 Purpose Bigger Than Self 08:46 Gratitude Changes Perspective 12:36 Honor Others Sacrifices 15:28 Conversation Questions 18:11 Closing Reflection And Thanks Discussion questions: When you hear the word courage, what does it mean to you? Can you think of a time you showed courage in sports or life?Who is someone that has made it possible for you to play your sport, and how could you show appreciation for them?What is one challenge you've faced that ended up helping you grow stronger?What does being part of something bigger than yourself look like on your team?How can you honor a fallen service member today? Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go. For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here. Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here. Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 Watch every episode of Car Ride Conversations here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOjguEFjF88w5Wl-eA9dlkwLk7f_sI12V

    20 min
  2. Building Confidence in Uncertain Situations: Helping Young Athletes Trust Themselves When Things Feel New

    May 18

    Building Confidence in Uncertain Situations: Helping Young Athletes Trust Themselves When Things Feel New

    How to Build Confidence When You Don’t Have the Experience Yet Valerie Alston shares lessons from speaking to a new audience at a dental association conference and connects that uncertainty to what young athletes face in sports: new teams, tougher competition, unfamiliar roles, and pressure moments. She explains how to build confidence without direct experience by pulling from similar past experiences, identifying when you’ve handled discomfort before, and taking a strengths-based approach that focuses on transferable skills and character traits. She emphasizes a growth mindset, trusting yourself to learn and adjust as situations unfold and recommends staying curious to reduce pressure and keep uncertainty from turning into panic. The episode ends with car-ride discussion prompts for parents and athletes about past scary situations, existing strengths, current uncertainties, and how confidence can grow during the experience. 00:00 New Audience Nerves 01:18 Confidence Without Experience 03:19 Borrow Past Similarities 06:28 Lead With Strengths 07:48 Growth Mindset Trust 08:52 Curiosity Over Fear 10:11 Support The Show 10:35 Family Discussion Questions 12:56 Wrap Up And Resources Discussion questions: What’s a situation in sports or school that felt scary at first, but you eventually figured out?When you face something new, what strengths do you already have that could help you?What’s something in your life right now that feels uncertain — and what’s one way you could approach it with curiosity instead of fear?How can we remind ourselves that confidence doesn’t always come before the experience — sometimes it grows through it?” Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go. For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here. Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here. Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 Watch every episode of Car Ride Conversations here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOjguEFjF88w5Wl-eA9dlkwLk7f_sI12V

    14 min
  3. Building Focus in a Distracted World: How Young Athletes Can Stay Locked In

    May 11

    Building Focus in a Distracted World: How Young Athletes Can Stay Locked In

    How Young Athletes Can Train Focus in a Distracted World (Mindfulness, Cue Words & Clear Targets) Host Valerie Alston explains why focus is harder than ever in today’s attention economy, where notifications and constant novelty train brains to shift attention for quick dopamine rewards, making sustained concentration feel like work. She describes how this shows up in youth sports as difficulty locking in during long practices, zoning out in drills, rushing reps, losing focus after mistakes, and quitting sooner when results aren’t immediate. Alston emphasizes that focus is a trainable skill and shares three practical tools: mindfulness practice (starting with 1–2 minutes of breath-focused attention and building toward about 12 minutes a day, 5 days a week for 8 weeks), in-the-moment cue words to redirect attention, and setting clear, specific process targets. She ends with family discussion questions and ideas to reduce distractions. 00:00 Distraction Era Athletes 01:01 Attention Economy Explained 03:29 How Distraction Hits Sports 06:27 Focus Is Trainable 07:06 Mindfulness For Focus 08:50 Breathing Practice Basics 11:58 Cue Words To Refocus 14:35 Set Clear Targets 16:21 Family Conversation Questions 19:15 Wrap Up And Next Steps Toughness Trainer - for Mindfulness https://toughnesstrainer.passion.io/ Amishi Jha - Peak Mind https://amzn.to/4wnf6mv Discussion questions: When do you feel most distracted during your sport practice, games, or somewhere else?What’s one thing you could focus on more consistently in your next game?Which focus tool do you think would help you most breathing, cue words, or setting a clear goal?What’s one distraction we could reduce during practice or before games to help you focus better? Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go. For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here. Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here. Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 Watch every episode of Car Ride Conversations here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOjguEFjF88w5Wl-eA9dlkwLk7f_sI12V

    20 min
  4. 5 Youth Sports Lessons from This Week: Steph Curry, the Kentucky Derby, Leadership & Mental Toughness

    May 4

    5 Youth Sports Lessons from This Week: Steph Curry, the Kentucky Derby, Leadership & Mental Toughness

    5 Quick Sports Lessons for Confident, Calm, Clutch Kids Host Valerie Alston shares a “grab bag” episode with five micro-lessons from sports to help young athletes build confidence, calm, and clutch performance: the Kentucky Derby comeback as a reminder not to panic when behind and that late bloomers exist; stats that 95% of Fortune 500 leaders and 94% of women in C-suite roles played competitive sports, reframing youth sports as life-skill development beyond scholarships or pros; Steph Curry’s diaphragmatic breath training with sandbags to improve conditioning and nervous-system regulation; a college baseball rain-delay dance-off highlighting how to stay loose and manage uncontrollable downtime; and the importance of teaching kids emotion vocabulary so labeling feelings reduces their power. The episode ends with family discussion questions about comparison, life skills from sport, breathing under pressure, and hard-to-talk-about emotions. 00:00 Grab Bag Kickoff 01:34 Derby Comeback Mindset 03:36 Late Bloomers and Grit 05:07 Sports Build Leaders 07:12 Curry Breath Training 10:01 Rain Delay Fun 12:28 Name It to Tame It 15:22 Listener Support and Setup 15:57 Car Ride Questions 20:31 Wrap Up and Next Steps Discussion questions: Where do you feel like you’re still in the middle of your race and shouldn’t compare yourself to others yet?What life skill do you think sports is teaching you right now besides just how to play?When you get nervous before games, what happens to your breathing and could practicing it help?What emotion do you think you feel most often in sports that’s hard to talk about? Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go. For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here. Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here. Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 Watch every episode of Car Ride Conversations here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOjguEFjF88w5Wl-eA9dlkwLk7f_sI12V

    22 min
  5. What to Do When Your Coach Is Hard on You: Helping Young Athletes Handle Tough Feedback

    Apr 27

    What to Do When Your Coach Is Hard on You: Helping Young Athletes Handle Tough Feedback

    How Young Athletes Can Handle Tough Coaches & Hard Feedback (Without Shutting Down) In this episode Valerie discusses how young athletes and parents can handle tough coaching and hard feedback. Many U.S. youth coaches are volunteers with limited formal training, yet most have good intentions and even great coaches give challenging correction. Athletes are encouraged to notice and manage their initial emotional reactions (embarrassment, frustration, anger) using simple resets like pausing, breathing, eye contact, and brief acknowledgments, then evaluate feedback by separating tone from content and asking if it’s true and useful (heard before, tied to clear standards, would another coach agree). She emphasizes reframing tough coaching as often not personal, taking ownership, staying curious, and asking clarifying questions. She also distinguishes discomfort from demeaning or inconsistent coaching and advises parents to manage their reactions, avoid undermining coaches, help kids process feedback logically, and address truly inappropriate behavior privately. 00:00 Tough Coach Reality 01:14 Youth Coaches Context 03:00 Manage Your Emotions 04:43 Quick Reset Tools 06:19 Is It True Useful 09:20 Reframe Coach Intent 11:06 Own It Stay Curious 13:11 When Coaching Crosses Line 15:16 Parents Handle Feedback 19:17 Subscribe And Questions 20:02 Athlete Reflection Prompts 23:19 Wrap Up And Resources Discussion questions: When a coach gives you tough feedback, what’s your first reaction — and what helps you reset?Can you think of a time when feedback felt harsh but actually helped you improve?How can you tell the difference between feedback that’s helpful and feedback that’s not clear?What’s one way I can support you when you’re dealing with a tough coach or hard feedback? Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go. For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here. Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here. Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 Watch every episode of Car Ride Conversations here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOjguEFjF88w5Wl-eA9dlkwLk7f_sI12V

    25 min
  6. You Are More Than Your Sport: Why Identity Matters for Young Athletes

    Apr 20

    You Are More Than Your Sport: Why Identity Matters for Young Athletes

    More Than Your Sport: Helping Young Athletes Build Identity, Resilience & Mental Health Valerie Alston shares lessons from an Olympic bobsledder who won gold but struggled with depression and feeling lost after sport ended, highlighting the risks of tying identity solely to athletics. She explains how defining yourself as “I am my sport” can link self-worth to performance, increase anxiety and pressure, and make mistakes feel like personal failure. The episode encourages young athletes to build multiple identities (student, friend, sibling, leader, creative, hobbies and interests) so setbacks, losses, injuries, and transitions are easier to handle, while also reducing burnout and supporting mental health. Valerie offers practical ways for families to protect time for other pursuits and provides car-ride discussion prompts to help athletes describe themselves beyond sport, identify outside strengths, and plan how to keep sport meaningful without letting it define them. 00:00 Olympian Identity Crash 01:02 Show Intro and Purpose 01:33 Gold Medal Reality Check 03:10 When Sport Becomes Self 05:04 Build Multiple Identities 07:54 Burnout and Mental Health 08:42 Finding Other Fuel 12:12 Resilience Through Transitions 14:49 Conversation Rules and Prompts 18:18 Wrap Up and Next Steps Discussion questions: If someone asked you to describe yourself without mentioning your sport, what would you say?What are some things you enjoy or feel confident in outside of your sport?How do you think having other interests or roles could help you when sports get tough?How can we make sure your sport is something you love — but not the only thing that defines you? Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go. For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here. Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here. Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 Watch every episode of Car Ride Conversations here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOjguEFjF88w5Wl-eA9dlkwLk7f_sI12V

    19 min
  7. When You Don’t Fit In on Your Team: Helping Young Athletes Build Confidence and Connection

    Apr 13

    When You Don’t Fit In on Your Team: Helping Young Athletes Build Confidence and Connection

    Feeling Like You Don’t Fit In on Your Team? How Young Athletes Can Build Connection & Confidence Host Valerie Alston discusses how common it is for youth athletes to feel like outsiders on a new team, when moving up age brackets, or transitioning from JV to varsity, and emphasizes that not fitting in doesn’t mean you don’t belong. She explains that teams aren’t necessarily friend groups; athletes don’t need to be best friends with everyone, but they do need trust, communication, respect, and support to compete together. The episode offers practical ways to find common ground: asking simple getting-to-know-you questions, giving compliments, communicating first, and bonding through shared practice and game experiences, while encouraging athletes to control what they can control, build confidence in being themselves, and aim for a few trusted connections. It concludes with conversation questions for families and ways to follow the show. 00:00 Feeling Left Out 01:11 Why It Happens 02:01 Team Not Friend Group 03:48 Connect On The Field 04:55 Find Common Ground 07:45 Small Circle Is Fine 09:27 Control What You Can 11:00 Conversation Rules 12:00 Guided Questions 16:21 Wrap Up And Resources Discussion questions: Have you ever felt like you didn’t quite fit in on a team? What made it feel that way?What’s one small way you could connect with a teammate, even if you don’t have much in common?Do you feel like you need to be friends with everyone on your team, or is it okay to just have a few close connections?What kind of teammate do you want to be, even if others aren’t acting the same way? Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go. For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here. Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here. Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 Watch every episode of Car Ride Conversations here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOjguEFjF88w5Wl-eA9dlkwLk7f_sI12V

    18 min
  8. Who Are You as an Athlete? Building Character When Things Don’t Feel Fair

    Apr 6

    Who Are You as an Athlete? Building Character When Things Don’t Feel Fair

    Core Values for Athletes: How to Handle Unfair Playing Time, Favoritism & Setbacks This episode was inspired by a discussion with an athlete frustrated by limited playing time and perceived unfairness, including the coach’s son getting more opportunities. She explains athletes can’t control circumstances but can control their character by defining 2–3 core values that guide behavior under pressure, uncertainty, and disappointment. Using examples like bench time, bad referee calls, and her own high school softball experience, she emphasizes that adversity reveals character and that coaches often decide based on attitude, resilience, and teammate behavior as much as skill. She highlights Texas walk-on Sarah Graves as a model of choosing to be an elite teammate and culture builder, introduces a “recruiting lens” to evaluate body language and responses, and offers reflection questions for families to discuss values and actions for the next practice or game. 00:00 When Sports Feel Unfair 01:20 Control What You Can 03:08 Choose Your Response 04:39 Define Core Values 06:05 Sarah Graves Example 08:17 Make Values Actionable 09:59 Recruiting Lens Mindset 12:11 Reset After Mistakes 14:58 Podcast Support Message 15:23 Car Ride Questions 19:27 Final Takeaways Goodbye Discussion questions: What kind of athlete and teammate do you want to be — regardless of your role or playing time?If a coach who didn’t know you was watching, what would they say about your attitude and behavior?When things feel unfair, what’s the hardest part for you — and how do you usually respond?What’s one way you could show your values more clearly in your next practice or game? Thanks for joining me on Confident, Calm, and Clutch Car Ride Conversations! If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe to the podcast so you never miss a moment. Share it with other parents or coaches who could use a little extra inspiration on the go. For exclusive tips, tools, and updates join my newsletter at www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter For more specific tips on building mental toughness, buy my book Confident, Calm and Clutch: How to build confidence and mental toughness for young athletes using sports psychology If you are a coach looking for ways to build mental toughness into your practices then check out my coaching resources (books, assessments, conversation starters, community and more) here. Parents join my Facebook group to Help Your Athlete Gain Mental Toughness for Parents Have an idea for a topic? Submit your idea here. Questions? Comments? Ideas? Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me on: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 Watch every episode of Car Ride Conversations here: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLOjguEFjF88w5Wl-eA9dlkwLk7f_sI12V

    21 min
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4.8
out of 5
13 Ratings

About

The ultimate podcast for parents, coaches, and youth sport athletes who want to unlock the secrets to mental toughness, confidence, and resilience. Whether you're on your way to practice, a big game, or just tackling the daily grind, these bite-sized episodes are designed to spark meaningful conversations to equip young athletes with actionable tools to thrive in school, sports and life while building strong relationships with their parents, one car ride at a time. Hosted by Valerie Alston, former D1 athlete, sport psychology expert, and resilience coach, each episode dives into key topics like building effective self-talk, staying calm under pressure, and bouncing back from setbacks. With real-life stories, practical tips, and relatable insights, you'll discover how to support your youth sport athlete's journey while strengthening your connection along the way. Buckle up and join us for a ride full of inspiration, growth, and the skills needed to become Confident, Calm, and Clutch! Questions? Comments? Ideas? ✉️ Email me: valerie.alston@valstoncoaching.com Follow Me On: 📘 Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/valstoncoaching 📸 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/valstoncoaching ▶️ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@valstoncoaching9666 ✨ For exclusive tips, tools, and updates, join my newsletter: 📬 https://www.confidentcalmclutch.com/newsletter

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