San Diego's top rated sex, intimacy, relationship and love coach takes you on a journey through all of that questions you've always wanted an answer to. This long form podcast offers clear, sensual, step by step guidance to have more romance, better chemistry, and help move past the pain from heartbreak or betrayal. Tari's unique blend of wisdom, intelligence and humor takes complex, hard to talk about subjects and breaks them down into something you can apply immediately. The Closeness podcast is your new s*xual education. A must for anyone who wants to elevate themselves or their intimate relationship to the next level.
Want to schedule an appointment for you and your partner in person or online? Fill out an intake form at www.getcloseness.com/intake
Can you have it all in relationships? Plus, female mating strategies
0:00 Introduction and can you have it all? Recitals and disclaimers
2:44 In a nutshell
4:20 What does it mean to have it all?
12:40 Should one person be your everything?
15:21 COVID and Politics
16:26 Are you really perfect, just the way you are?
17:40 The Disney Fairytale
21:30 How Women Select mates
24:39 How men often think of intimacy
25:45 Great sex does not come naturally to most many men
33:04 How does one become a skilled lover?
37:25 Can a man really become a sexual dynamo?
40:26 An unskilled woman CAN be flipped into a fantastic lover
47:24 What do I make of all of this?
49:15 The fallacy of, If they can do it I can too"
56:24 Further thoughtsWe're one moment away from a meltdown
58:09 Is it ok that you don't have it all in your relationship?
Profound life lessons from 30 expressions we no longer need
6:40 Oh you really don't care?
7:38 Words carry power
8:35 I don't sugar coat
12:46 A certain type of emoji
14:55 Who hurt you?
22:55 It is what it is
30:42 Like I said
34:27 Thoughts on talking and conversing
36:10 Useless filler words
38:55 Pour some sprinkles on me
39:23 Low key pointless phrases
41:06 Other phrases that have gone out of style
44:00 I feel like...
48:20 Next time
49:15 It depends
52:07 I just can't possibly imagine
55:09 I just can't explain it
58:28 I'm really so picky and selective
59:32 The misogynist
1:05:31 Shots fired
1:08:28 Just curious
1:10:28 I'm not like all those other girls
1:13:07 Who hurt you?
1:15:20 I can't believe I am doing this!
1:17:01 Keep it chill, what will be will be x=x
1:21:38 Get your ish together
1:24:14 That big D energy and vibin
1:26:02 You can't tell me what to do and starting fights from nothing
1:26:46 Don't judge!
1:34:42 I don't want to argue
1:37:50 It's complicated
1:39:06 Female entitlement for the goddess
1:42:50 Dealing with the most painful type of emotional hurt - special edition
To come or not to come. The male ejaculatory response, and how women feel about it
One of the biggest questions of our time as it pertains to intimacy is whether or not a man should always "finish" when having sex. This episodes dives deep into the pros and cons and explores the little known avenue of pressure that women can place on men. Topics include:
0:53 Societal expectations around finishing
1:33 Typical expectations around male ejaculation
9:10 Is a male orgasm bad?
12:03 The spiritual minded orgasm
13:17 Restraining for energy
14:44 Everyone has a different sex drive
23:15 There is no reward for marathon sex
30:58 Final thoughts on pressure
34:10 Final thoughts and tips
Confessions of an ex NYC male sex worker
In our first interview with a male guest, we're pulling out all of the stops. Sebastien is an ex New York City rent boy and long term friend of mine. We’ll go in depth about his ‘job,’ the world of chemsex, his spiral into addiction and his recovery. Tune in to listen to his story now.
4:02 How we met
6:25 How did a foreigner find himself at UCLA
7:12 Dry wit disclaimer
9:48 What kind of household did you grow up in?
10:39 Did you have a sense of your sexuality or asexuality when you were a boy?
14:36 What was your relationship like with your parents?
24:52 Childhood trauma and being denied humanity
26:36 The transition from being private to being a sex worker
32:46 Sexual hierarchies
34:36 Must you be a dom or sub in the gay community?
37:30 What is the true nature of someone who flips?
51:35 what is your favorite kind of man to interact with?
1:05:45 Is it difficult for someone who is overweight or unattractive in the gay community
1:07:37 Key sexual differences between men and women
1:10:12 Does sexual consent exist in the gay community
1:20:55 Will you struggle with addiction for the rest of your life or can your be temperate?
1:26:48 Was being a sex worker a full time job?
1:29:46 More key differences between men and women. Novelty and variety.
1:34:52 Are viagra, Trimix, or Cialis addictive?
1:35:51 Once a ho always a ho?
1:36:40 How do you give back to the community?
Welcome to the closeness podcast, your new sexual education. My name is Tari. I'm your host. And after nearly 60 episodes of closeness today's interview features our first male guest. If you haven't done so already, please take a moment to subscribe to our email@example.com/closeness or anywhere else. Podcasts can be found. Now, are you ready to come closer? Let's get started. Today's interview is with a friend of mine who I've known for nearly 25 years. And what I think you'll find fascinating about his story aside from the juicy details of this title and the cover art is this man's sexual or even non-sexual journey over the years. But before we jump into this story today, I want to use this opportunity to spend a few minutes talking about my background, how I grew up in my story as well. And interestingly, whether we're talking about mostly spiritually, financially, or sexually, we both took such different paths to become the men who we are today. Speaker 0 00:00:55 I think you're going to find both of our stories, fascinating, interesting, and fun to listen to. So let me tie it all together. My friend, Sebastian and I met while completing our undergrad at UCLA, but I want to share a little bit about how I wound up there prior to living in Los Angeles. It was my senior year at UC Santa Barbara, and I had already spent one year living abroad in Venice on top of spending about two years, studying Italian before living abroad. I wasn't ready to graduate because I was having so much fun. So I petitioned the UC system to allow me to extend my college education for one more quarter, while I transferred down to UCLA there, I would take Japanese Italian conversation, modern dance and jazz, and to my luck and surprise, I wound up with Italian roommates as well. This allowed me to keep practicing the language, to be social with Italians and to keep the Italian language at the forefront of my mind. Now I had studied philosophy, ethics, public policy, art history, and Italian in Italian and in Italy, and also had to give my final exams orally in Italian. For those of you who don't know is a very different system there, you don't get an, a, B, C, or D. You get a zero to 30 or three. like 30 and high marks. You get this grade by sitting in front of your teacher's desk and conversing with her, impressing her with your knowledge. And if everything works out the way it should, then you get your high marks. If not, you get lashings with the back of
What to do and what it means when a woman says she needs space
One of the most difficult things someone can hear, is that their partner needs space. Nothing is clear, the terms are undefined, and once uttered it usually ends up in disaster. Tune in now to find out what to do.
5:25 Malignant phrases
6:20 How to handle short term space
8:38 When she takes days, weeks and months of space
13:15 What you're supposed to know when she says she needs space
16:08 If you're going to try to make it work, here's what you should do. 15 minutes.
34:42 Do the feelings of the other partner matter?
39:54 How to correctly ask for space
42:21 Asking for space in a healthy and conscious way
44:55 What NOT to do when you needs space
47:36 Should you go out, party, drink and do drugs?
52:45 You actually could have just ended the relationship
53:32 When a guys never texts you back or calls you back...
56:15 How much space do you actually need?
56:54 Why women get upset when a man asks natural questions
59:15 If you're going through this now, it gets worse...
1:03:25 The pitfalls of actually taking space
1:06:42 What if your partner doesn't need or want space but you do?
1:08:43 What if the man needs space?
1:10:54 Summing it all up
1:15:15 How anger and resentment plays in to taking space
1:25:50 Does Tari actually see the value in taking space?
Thank you for listening! We hope you enjoyed this immensely.
Part 3: How to properly handle and move on from a breakup
1:45 Actions speak louder than words
5:55 What do you actually owe the other person?
8:24 Do unto others as you would have them do unto you
10:36 When we invest ourselves too much and get overextended
13:54 Self care and taking care of ourselves
20:23 When you think you don't want anyone else but them
23:28 getting over your previous relationships
24:36 an exercise to show yourself you can get past this... using your exes
26:20 Caring for and helping others...once you're healed
28:21 Can you still be friends with your ex or after a breakup?
30:48 How do you treat your ex after a breakup?
32:38 Personal stories of trying to remain friends with exes
34:15 Why must we NEVER touch again after breaking up?
36:26 The ways that couples deal with breakups
38:34 How to not handle your breakup
41:48 Advice for the person who is hurting the most
45:56 Do you even want to be friends after a breakup?
47:46 Personal stories about breakups and relationships
49:11 Being in love when someone only 'likes' you back
51:42 What to do if you feel like you actually love them more
55:28 Don't stay in relationships where you partner doesn't show up for you
59:17 Personal experience from a partner loving me more, but I wasn't there yet
1:03:13 Nobody wants to be loved when you're thinking about someone else
Closeness with Tari
Tari is absolutely amazing, and is able to listen, understand, and translate the issues you are having to your partner in a gentle unbiased way. You are able to speak freely without judgement.
Well spoken and extremely insightful, Tari helps navigate through tough and somewhat taboo topics.
Everyone needs Tari in their life! Thanks for sharing this awesome insight and advice. Love the guests! :-)