Doing Divorce Different with Lesa Koski

Lesa Koski
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Divorce, co-parenting, menopause, marriage, and starting over after 40—this podcast is your guide to a healthier, faith-filled life transition. Hosted by family law attorney, mediator, and life coach Lesa Koski, each episode is designed to take the fear out of major life change and guide you toward peace—whether you’re facing separation, navigating a divorce, working to strengthen your relationship, or rebuilding your life in midlife. You’ll get heart-centered legal clarity, emotional support, and practical tools to help you heal, grow, and move forward with confidence. Topics include: Peaceful divorce strategies and mediation support Co-parenting help and parenting plans that actually work Prenups, postnups, and how to protect what matters most Emotional healing, mindset shifts, and confidence after a hard season Menopause, health changes, and how midlife affects mood, marriage, and motivation Wellness basics that make a real difference: rest, nutrition, movement, strength, and community This is more than a show about endings—it’s about becoming the woman who rises stronger, steadier, and clearer on the other side. About the Host: Lesa has spent over 25 years helping families through mediation and family law, always focused on protecting what matters most—your kids and your peace of mind. She’s also a breast cancer survivor, wellness advocate, cowgirl at heart, and follower of Jesus who believes your hardest season can become your greatest comeback. If you’re craving practical guidance, soul-level encouragement, and real conversations about rebuilding life after 40, you’re in the right place. Website: https://www.lesakoski.com/

  1. Divorce and Finances: How to Overcome Fear and Take Control of Your Future

    1D AGO

    Divorce and Finances: How to Overcome Fear and Take Control of Your Future

    Divorce and finances can feel overwhelming, confusing, and scary—but they don’t have to. In this episode, we break down divorce and finances, how to overcome fear, and how to build financial confidence after divorce. If you’re navigating divorce and finances, this conversation will help you feel more empowered, informed, and in control of your future. In this episode, Lesa sits down with financial advisor and Certified Transition Specialist Kathleen Judge to talk about one of the biggest fears women face during divorce—finances. Together, they explore how your relationship with money is shaped, why so many women feel disconnected from financial decisions, and how to rebuild confidence step by step. You’ll learn the three phases of financial transition, how to avoid costly mistakes, and how to align your finances with what truly matters most in your life. Whether you’re going through a divorce, preparing for one, or simply want to feel more confident with your money, this episode is for you. Timestamps: (00:00) Introduction to divorce and financial fear (03:45) Kathleen’s personal story and career transition (08:20) Why women feel disconnected from finances (12:10) Financial triage: what to do first in divorce (18:30) The messy middle: emotions and decision-making (24:15) Common financial mistakes to avoid (28:40) Understanding assets, debt, and beneficiaries (34:10) Aligning money with your values (40:05) Creating a vision for your financial future (45:20) Final thoughts and how to get support Key Takeaways: Financial fear during divorce is normal—and can be overcome with clarity and supportAvoid major financial decisions in the first 3–6 months (financial triage phase)Understanding your assets, debts, and cash flow creates immediate empowermentYour financial decisions should align with your personal values and life goalsWorking with a financial advisor can prevent costly mistakes and provide peace of mind Guest Bio: Kathleen Judge is a financial advisor with Edward Jones and a Certified Transition Specialist. She specializes in helping individuals navigate major life transitions such as divorce, widowhood, and retirement. Kathleen is passionate about empowering women to understand their finances, build confidence, and create a secure financial future. Resource Links: Kathleen Judge (Edward Jones):Doing Divorce Different PodcastLesa Koski Coaching & Mediation Services Tags/Keywords: divorce and finances, divorce financial planning, women and money, financial empowerment for women, divorce recovery, financial advisor divorce, budgeting after divorce, divorce coaching, midlife divorce, financial confidence, money mindset, women over 40 finances, divorce mediation, financial independence, life after divorce

    31 min
  2. How to Heal Anxiety & Trauma After Divorce | Nervous System Healing with Mitch Webb

    MAR 31

    How to Heal Anxiety & Trauma After Divorce | Nervous System Healing with Mitch Webb

    Anxiety after divorce, trauma healing, and nervous system regulation—learn how to heal anxiety naturally and feel better in midlife. In this episode, Lesa Koski talks with nervous system coach Mitch Webb about anxiety, trauma healing, and how your nervous system impacts your health, stress, and emotional recovery. If you're navigating divorce or high stress, this conversation will help you understand anxiety and begin healing your nervous system in a practical, grounded way. Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction to anxiety, divorce, and healing (03:45) Mitch Webb’s story: trauma, illness, and recovery (10:20) What anxiety really is (and why you can’t “fix” it) (18:30) Lesa’s cancer journey and wake-up call (26:15) Nervous system dysregulation explained (35:40) Why high achievers struggle with anxiety (44:10) Functional freeze and hidden stress (52:00) How to stop fixing and start healing (1:00:25) Co-parenting, triggers, and boundaries (1:10:40) Building emotional capacity and healing patterns (1:18:00) Final thoughts + how to work with Mitch Key Takeaways:• Anxiety is not a problem—it’s your body communicating • Nervous system dysregulation is often the root of chronic stress • Healing comes from awareness and new experiences, not just information • You can feel anxious and still be safe • Boundaries and self-awareness are key to emotional healing Guest Bio:Mitch Webb is a nervous system and holistic health coach who helps individuals heal anxiety, trauma, and chronic stress by reconnecting with their body. After overcoming multiple health challenges—including traumatic brain injuries, Lyme disease, and long COVID—Mitch now guides others in regulating their nervous system and creating lasting emotional and physical healing. Resource Links:Free Nervous System Quiz https://mitch-webb.involve.me/nervous-system-state-quiz FREE 30 min Session w Mitch https://calendly.com/k-mitch-webb/15-minute-meeting Website and Social Media links: https://www.instagram.com/kmitchwebb https://www.linkedin.com/in/kmitchwebb https://mitchwebb.com DIY Parenting Plan Course Find More From Lesa Here! Sign up for my newsletter https://enchanting-basil-714.myflodesk.com/qwzridafyj Tags/Keywords:anxiety healing, nervous system regulation, trauma healing, divorce recovery, emotional healing, stress management, midlife women, co-parenting stress, functional medicine, anxiety help, nervous system coach, healing after divorce

    32 min

  3. MAR 24

    Trauma Healing After Abuse: Hope, Nervous System Recovery, and Practical Tools for Healing | Dr. Dawn Marie Part 2

    Trauma healing, nervous system regulation, and hope after abuse are possible — even after unimaginable pain. In this powerful Part 2 conversation, Lesa Koski talks with Dr. Dawn Marie about trauma healing, childhood abuse, vagus nerve regulation, polyvagal theory, and practical tools that can support healing after trauma, divorce, and emotional overwhelm. If you’ve ever wondered whether trauma healing is truly possible after years of pain, this episode offers both hope and practical next steps. Dr. Dawn Marie shares her personal story of surviving profound childhood abuse, explains how trauma affects the body and nervous system, and offers simple ways listeners can begin supporting trauma healing in their own daily lives. This episode is especially meaningful for women navigating divorce, childhood trauma, emotional stress, or any season that has left them feeling stuck in survival mode. Trauma healing is possible, and this conversation is a reminder that even after the hardest experiences, hope remains. Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction to Part 2 and why trauma matters in divorce healing (02:10) Dr. Dawn Marie begins sharing her childhood trauma story (06:45) Abuse, early memories, and how trauma lives in the body (12:20) Revisiting places from the past and uncovering memory (18:15) Shame, perpetrators, and beginning the healing journey (26:30) Why trauma is trauma and why it is time to break the cycle (30:40) A spiritual discussion on women, Eve, and responsibility (41:20) What healing really looks like after severe trauma (44:10) Why bad days do not mean you are broken (46:05) Polyvagal theory and understanding the vagus nerve (48:30) Grounding techniques and simple tools for nervous system regulation (51:15) African drumming, weighted hula hoop, and rhythmic healing practices (55:00) Final encouragement and hope for women healing from trauma Key Takeaways:Trauma healing is possible, even after severe childhood abuse and long-term painHealing is not linear, and setbacks do not mean you are brokenTrauma affects both the body and the nervous system, not just thoughts and emotionsGrounding exercises and vagus nerve regulation can support healing in daily lifeHope grows when people begin to believe their story is not over Guest Bio:Dr. Dawn Marie is a board-certified psychiatrist with decades of medical experience and a deep focus on trauma healing, nervous system regulation, and emotional recovery. Through both her professional work and her own healing journey, she helps people understand that healing is possible, even after profound trauma. Resource Links:Part 1 with Dr. Dawn Marie: https://player.captivate.fm/episode/1cfa0fc7-1d7d-4d31-a9b0-b47aac4a11dc/ Website and Social Media links: https://www.drrisleychilds.com/ to awaken your vagus nerve: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3VuPpgmSPwk7cErnqrNhCH?si=a3824002e9774659 To calm your vagus nerve: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3YC0zMSeGQRqg4XmscoyCG?si=d1b93c15519f4ecc African Drums: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5z2d4y9MXXjQQiYC8c46Fk?si=10b08e8109634214 Amazon weighted hula hoop: https://a.co/d/06DXlzwC Tags/Keywords:trauma healing, childhood trauma recovery, nervous system healing, vagus nerve regulation, polyvagal theory, abuse recovery, healing after trauma, divorce and trauma, women healing after divorce, emotional healing podcast, trauma recovery podcast, hope after abuse, Doing Divorce Different podcast, mental health and healing

    32 min
  4. How Trauma Lives in the Body — And How Midlife Women Can Heal | Trauma Recovery with Psychiatrist Dr. Risley Childs

    MAR 17

    How Trauma Lives in the Body — And How Midlife Women Can Heal | Trauma Recovery with Psychiatrist Dr. Risley Childs

    Trauma recovery, nervous system healing, and emotional healing for midlife women are possible at any age. In this powerful conversation, psychiatrist Dr. Risley Childs explains how trauma lives in the body, affects high-achieving women, and how trauma recovery and nervous system healing can begin even decades later. Many midlife women live in chronic fight-or-flight without realizing trauma recovery is needed. Dr. Childs shares how trauma recovery works, how trauma affects the nervous system, and why trauma recovery is possible regardless of your past. If you’ve experienced divorce, emotional stress, burnout, or chronic anxiety, this episode will help you understand trauma recovery, nervous system healing, and how to begin healing your trauma safely. This episode offers hope, science, and practical understanding for trauma recovery and midlife healing. Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction to trauma recovery and midlife healing (02:15) Dr. Childs’ medical background and journey into psychiatry (05:32) How trauma affects high-achieving women (09:10) Fight-or-flight and nervous system dysregulation explained (13:40) How childhood environments shape adult behavior (18:20) Why trauma lives in the body, not just the mind (23:10) The vagus nerve and nervous system healing (28:45) Healing trauma later in life — why it’s not too late (34:10) Rest, healing, and breaking hyper-achievement patterns Key Takeaways:• Trauma often shows up as achievement, people-pleasing, and chronic stress • Trauma lives in the nervous system and body, not just the mind • Fight-or-flight states can persist for decades without awareness • Healing trauma is possible at any age, including midlife • Rest and nervous system regulation are critical components of healing Guest Bio:Dr. Risley Childs is a board-certified psychiatrist with over 30 years of clinical experience. She specializes in trauma recovery, nervous system healing, and helping high-achieving women understand and heal from the long-term effects of trauma. Resource Links:Website and Social Media links: https://www.drrisleychilds.com/ to awaken your vagus nerve: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3VuPpgmSPwk7cErnqrNhCH?si=a3824002e9774659 To calm your vagus nerve: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/3YC0zMSeGQRqg4XmscoyCG?si=d1b93c15519f4ecc African Drums: https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5z2d4y9MXXjQQiYC8c46Fk?si=10b08e8109634214 Amazon weighted hula hoop: https://a.co/d/06DXlzwC Tags/Keywords:trauma recovery, nervous system healing, midlife healing, emotional trauma healing, trauma and nervous system, trauma recovery podcast, women over 40 healing, trauma therapy, divorce trauma healing, fight or flight healing, emotional recovery midlife, psychiatrist interview trauma, Doing Life Different podcast, trauma recovery women

    39 min
  5. Amicable Divorce & Real Support: How the National Association for Single & Divorced Families Is Changing Divorce Recovery

    MAR 10

    Amicable Divorce & Real Support: How the National Association for Single & Divorced Families Is Changing Divorce Recovery

    Amicable divorce, divorce recovery, and real support for single parents — this episode explores how to navigate divorce with dignity and community. In this powerful conversation on Doing Divorce Different, Lesa Koski sits down with Joy Reed, co-founder of the National Association for Single & Divorced Families (NASDF), to discuss what an amicable divorce really looks like — and why divorce recovery requires more than just legal paperwork. Joy shares her deeply personal story of navigating an amicable divorce, the unexpected grief that followed, and how that journey led her to help build the National Association for Single & Divorced Families. Together, they explore how divorce can be handled with respect, how identity shifts after separation, and why community support is essential during divorce recovery. This episode dives into: What makes an amicable divorce possibleThe grief of divorce (even when it’s peaceful)Divorce identity loss and rebuildingResources for single parents and divorced familiesWhy divorce recovery needs financial, mental health, and childcare support If you’re navigating divorce, considering divorce, or supporting someone through divorce recovery, this conversation will remind you that divorce doesn’t have to be a war — and you don’t have to do it alone. Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction to amicable divorce and today’s guest (03:12) Joy’s story of an amicable divorce and staying connected (08:45) The grief of divorce — identity loss and emotional waves (14:20) Divorce recovery and losing your “role” in marriage (19:05) The founding of the National Association for Single & Divorced Families (24:40) The lack of divorce support resources beyond lawyers (29:15) Mediation vs. litigation and accessible divorce options (34:50) Financial strain of divorce and support for single parents (40:10) Building a national support network for divorced families (46:05) Why community is essential during divorce recovery (49:20) Final thoughts on service, dignity, and doing divorce differently Key Takeaways:Divorce can be amicable — but grief still comes in waves.Identity loss is one of the hardest parts of divorce recovery.Accessible mediation and resources reduce long-term emotional damage.Single parents and divorced families need financial, mental health, and childcare support.Community and service are powerful tools for healing after divorce. Guest Bio:Joy Reed is the co-founder of the National Association for Single & Divorced Families (NASDF), a national organization dedicated to supporting single parents and families navigating divorce recovery. With a passion for service and community impact, Joy helps connect divorced and single families with resources including mediation access, financial guidance, childcare support, and mental health services. Her mission is to make divorce recovery more accessible, less isolating, and more dignified for families nationwide. Resource Links:National Association for Single & Divorced Families (NASDF): https://www.nasdf.org/about Learn more about Doing Divorce Different: https://lesakoski.com Tags/Keywords:amicable divorce, divorce recovery, National Association for Single and Divorced Families, NASDF, divorce support, single parent resources, mediation vs litigation, divorce grief, co-parenting after divorce, divorce identity loss, healthy divorce, divorce podcast, doing divorce different, divorce without fighting, divorce community support, single mom resources, single dad resources, divorce advice, peaceful divorce

    28 min

  6. MAR 3

    Collaborative Divorce Explained: A Better Way to Divorce with Respect (Minnesota) | Divorce With Respect Week

    Collaborative divorce offers a respectful, structured alternative to litigation for couples who want to avoid court battles and create agreements that protect children and finances. In this episode, Lesa Koski sits down with Minnesota collaborative professionals Jana Hefty and Michelle Leason to explain how collaborative divorce works, who it’s best for, and why collaborative divorce can save time, reduce conflict, and support healthier co-parenting. You’ll learn the key differences between collaborative divorce vs mediation vs litigation, how financial neutrals help organize assets and cashflow planning, and what happens if the collaborative divorce process doesn’t work. This conversation is especially helpful for parents considering divorce who want a better way to divorce with respect. Divorce doesn’t have to be a fight. Collaborative divorce can be a better way. Timestamps:(00:00) Welcome + why divorce doesn’t have to be a fight (01:30) Introducing Jana Hefty and Michelle Leason (03:15) Jana’s path to law + staying calm in crisis (06:45) Michelle’s background as a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst and mediator (10:10) What collaborative divorce is and how it works (13:40) The collaborative divorce team: attorneys, financial neutral, child specialist (17:10) Why finances feel scary and how to create clarity early (21:30) What happens if collaborative divorce doesn’t work (25:10) Cost and timeline: collaborative divorce vs litigation (28:30) Divorce With Respect Week (March 1–8) + how to find resources (30:10) Closing thoughts + next steps Key Takeaways:• Collaborative divorce helps couples avoid court and make decisions together • A team approach supports finances, parenting plans, and communication • Financial neutrals reduce duplicated work and improve clarity • Collaborative divorce can be less expensive and faster than litigation • If collaborative fails, agreements can still be used—progress isn’t lost Guest Bio:Jana Hefty is a Minnesota collaborative family law attorney who helps couples navigate divorce with respect, structure, and reduced conflict. Michelle Liesen is a Certified Divorce Financial Analyst (CDFA) and Minnesota-qualified mediator. She founded Divorce Smart and helps couples understand assets, budgeting, and post-divorce financial planning. Resource Links:https://collaborativedivorcecalifornia.com/dwrw/ https://collaborativelaw.org/ https://www.mydivorcesmart.com/

    31 min
  7. Why Joy Is Essential for Healing and Reinvention | Finding Laughter in Midlife

    FEB 26

    Why Joy Is Essential for Healing and Reinvention | Finding Laughter in Midlife

    Finding joy in midlife can feel impossible during stress, divorce, or reinvention — but joy and laughter are powerful tools for healing, nervous system regulation, and resilience. In this Saddle Up segment, Lesa Koski shares why joy is essential for healing, how laughter resets the nervous system, and how finding joy can transform your midlife experience. If you’ve been white-knuckling your way through life, this episode will help you understand why joy is essential for healing and why laughter may be one of the most important tools for emotional wellness. Lesa shares personal stories, practical ways to add joy into daily life, and insights from her recent conversation with Rabbi Bob Alper. You’ll learn how joy supports nervous system health, reduces stress, and creates space for reinvention. This episode is especially powerful for women navigating midlife transitions, divorce recovery, and personal reinvention. Joy is essential for healing. And sometimes, it begins with laughter. Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction to this week’s Saddle Up segment (01:10) Why joy becomes essential during midlife transitions (02:35) The powerful story shared by Rabbi Bob Alper (04:20) How laughter resets the nervous system (06:10) Lesa’s personal journey from white-knuckling to finding joy (08:05) Simple ways to intentionally add joy into daily life (10:15) Why joy improves stress, health, and emotional resilience (12:05) Encouragement for listeners navigating heavy seasons Key Takeaways:• Joy helps regulate the nervous system and reduce chronic stress • Laughter provides emotional relief even during difficult circumstances • Midlife reinvention requires emotional lightness, not just discipline • Small intentional moments of joy can significantly improve well-being • White-knuckling life increases stress, while joy supports healing

    6 min
  8. Find Joy After 40: Humor, Purpose & Second Acts with Rabbi Bob Alper (Standup Comedian Rabbi)

    FEB 24

    Find Joy After 40: Humor, Purpose & Second Acts with Rabbi Bob Alper (Standup Comedian Rabbi)

    Finding joy after 40 starts with humor, purpose, and the courage to pursue a second act. In this uplifting episode, Lesa sits down with Rabbi Bob Alper—standup comedian, author, and widely loved “rabbi with a punchline”—to talk about finding joy after 40, chasing your calling, and using humor to heal. Bob shares how he went from decades in the pulpit to a full-time comedy career, what kept him going through the bad nights, and why laughter isn’t just entertainment—it has a meaningful, even “holy” purpose. You’ll hear powerful stories about humor helping people through grief, cancer, and hard seasons, plus a behind-the-scenes look at Bob’s viral “funny driver’s license” that has brightened strangers’ days for years. If you’re craving joy, longing for a second act, or learning how to stop white-knuckling life and start enjoying it—this episode is for you. Timestamps:(00:00) Introduction: finding joy, second acts, and why humor matters (02:10) Rabbi Bob’s take: humor has a “holy purpose” (05:10) Lesa’s personal shift: missing fun and joy while “white-knuckling” life (07:05) When Bob knew his calling was shifting (09:30) The Jewish Comic of the Year contest that changed everything (12:20) Why standup is different: instant validation and connection (14:45) The moment a dying woman said: “For an hour and a half, I forgot I was sick” (17:10) Bad nights, polite applause, and why grit matters (20:05) Bob’s “funny driver’s license” and the mission behind it (25:30) TSA and rental car stories: joy in everyday encounters (29:20) Keeping humor wholesome: never at someone else’s expense (33:10) The joke Bob removed forever—and why (36:40) Bob’s books: Life Doesn’t Get Better Than This and Thanks, I Needed That (40:20) A powerful story from the book: “Then I held you” (45:10) Writing, rejection, and why publishing builds resilience (50:00) Where to find Bob and his work + closing reflections on joy Key Takeaways:Humor isn’t “extra”—it can be a meaningful tool for healing and connectionA second act can start by following what energizes you and what people respond toGrit is required: failure is part of finding your voice and refining your craftWholesome laughter matters—true humor shouldn’t come at someone else’s expenseJoy can be intentionally practiced through everyday moments, not just big life changes Guest Bio:Rabbi Bob Alper is a standup comedian, author, and former congregational rabbi who transitioned into comedy full-time after decades of using humor as a tool for connection and teaching. He has performed across the U.S. and internationally, including faith-based events for diverse audiences. Bob is the author of Life Doesn’t Get Better Than This and Thanks, I Needed That: And Other Stories of the Spirit, sharing poignant, heartfelt stories about meaning, laughter, and the human experience. Resource Links:Website and Social Media links: http://www.bobalper.com/ http://www.facebook.com/thatfunnyrabbi http://www.instagram.com/bobalper/ http://www.tiktok.com/@comedian1818 http://www.youtube.com/@bobalper1 x.com/bob_alper?s=09 http://www.linkedin.com/in/bobalper/

    30 min
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About

Divorce, co-parenting, menopause, marriage, and starting over after 40—this podcast is your guide to a healthier, faith-filled life transition. Hosted by family law attorney, mediator, and life coach Lesa Koski, each episode is designed to take the fear out of major life change and guide you toward peace—whether you’re facing separation, navigating a divorce, working to strengthen your relationship, or rebuilding your life in midlife. You’ll get heart-centered legal clarity, emotional support, and practical tools to help you heal, grow, and move forward with confidence. Topics include: Peaceful divorce strategies and mediation support Co-parenting help and parenting plans that actually work Prenups, postnups, and how to protect what matters most Emotional healing, mindset shifts, and confidence after a hard season Menopause, health changes, and how midlife affects mood, marriage, and motivation Wellness basics that make a real difference: rest, nutrition, movement, strength, and community This is more than a show about endings—it’s about becoming the woman who rises stronger, steadier, and clearer on the other side. About the Host: Lesa has spent over 25 years helping families through mediation and family law, always focused on protecting what matters most—your kids and your peace of mind. She’s also a breast cancer survivor, wellness advocate, cowgirl at heart, and follower of Jesus who believes your hardest season can become your greatest comeback. If you’re craving practical guidance, soul-level encouragement, and real conversations about rebuilding life after 40, you’re in the right place. Website: https://www.lesakoski.com/

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