From Arguments to Shared Goals

Every time you “win” an argument as a leader, you actually lose influence.

In this episode I reveal why arguments sabotage trust, how to spot the ego traps that bait you in, and a proven redirect playbook to turn conflict into collaboration.

You’ll leave with scripts, questions, and practical tools to lead with calm authority instead of loud authority.

What you will learn:

• Why winning debates is always a leadership loss

• The hidden costs of ego-driven conversations

• How to spot your physical and emotional triggers

• A question-led redirect playbook to cool down heat

• Real-world examples for peers and direct reports

• Why silence and curiosity are the most underrated leadership tools

Timestamps 00:00 – Opening hook and show intro 04:10 – Why arguments destroy trust and long-term influence 09:00 – Ego traps and the hidden cost of short-term wins 14:25 – Common missteps: interruptions, showdowns, public arguments 19:30 – Why compliance is not buy-in and the myth of silence 24:20 – Personal story: healthy debate vs. workplace arguments 29:00 – Physical tells: signs you’re about to take the bait 33:40 – Redirecting with questions instead of counterattacks 38:05 – Silence, mirroring, and shared goals as leadership tools 42:00 – Wrap-up, checklist, and closing actions

Links:

📘 Download the Free eBook: The Roadmap to Difficult Conversations 🌐 Explore Our Leadership Programs: rdltraining.com

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