The heart is central to design and identity. Condition of our heart today usually leads us first to look at relationships and marriage, which I will do today as well. Our hearts are under attack, e.g. high divorce rate, people not interested in marriage and just living together. We look at it from a Christian perspective and therefore believe in the strength and value and beauty of marriage between a man and a woman. When I was young I also didn't see the value of marriage and healthy relationships. It took a big mess in my life to realize the importance of marriage and relationships. In the process, when I met the love of my life, I wasn't the man God had created because of my heart, with devastating consequences. Sometimes it seems God lets us be shattered into a million pieces because of our hard heartedness, pride, arrogance and stubbornness and nothing else would therefore get through to us and change us. Some of the things I learnt about marriage, relationships and family include: Don't live with someone who is not your husband or wife because it messes up your life, their life, and those of others around you. Don't compromise on your values. You have to find agreement in how you live because a house divided against itself cannot stand (Matt. 12:25) Discern between lies and truth and furiously defend the truth. There is no place for lies in any relationship. Before getting into a relationship and especially marriage, you need to know who you are. Work out the cost of it, like the Cost of discipleship of Dietrich Bonhoeffer is about Christian discipleship. Marriage is not a game. Be intentional, considerate, kind, gentle, and recognize that everyone has things they are struggling with and are working through. Your spouse is the one who you are prepared to put up with their shortcomings, quirks, and weird things. If it's anybody else, you won't be able to do that. Any relationship means you do things together, especially marriage. If you can't do this, there may be a problem. (Matt 19:4-6 says in verse 4: "And he answered and said to them, 'Have you not read, that he who made them at the beginning made them male and female," which refers to Gen. 1:27. Verse 5: "And said, 'For this reason a man shall leave father and mother, and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh?" Verse 6: "So then, they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.") If you want to wait until everything is perfect, it will never happen. Nobody is perfect. Don't try to fix him or her. Work together on your shortcomings. Forgive, forgive, forgive. Stop doing what isn't your role. Rather help each other do what their role is, whether husband or wife. Spend time together regularly and make time for special events. Pay attention to the small things. It takes effort, but a 3-fold cord is not easily or quickly broken (Eccl. 4:12). So pull together in the same direction. It is not 50/50, but 100/100. Work and fight to protect, nurture and grow what you have. On other aspects pertaining to the heart: There is too much verbal and physical abuse. There is general lack of consideration, kindness, gentleness and sensitivity towards others. Too much bullying and hurting others. If other things take priority over helping others who need it. (Look at the parable of the good Samaritan in Luk. 10-25-37) An unhealthy focus on money, power and your Self. Lack of honor and respect. There are many reasons for these things, but one of them is certainly a heart that is broke, unhealthy, unrestored, hardened, sick, bleeding. Luk 6:31 - "And just as you want men to do to you, you also do to them likewise." If we could just apply what Jesus teaches here, the world would already be so much more a better place. There is too much anger, hate, cruelty, meanness, envy, deceit and manipulation int he world today. Our hearts are not what they should be because there is too much hate, anger and things that divide and destroy us. I hear hearts are crying out, breaking, broken and I see it everywhere. It is time to return to who we were made, to our true identity, and for restoration. God is calling you and speaking to your heart. Turn around. Your heart is crying out. The world is waiting to see your true self. Jesus came for restoration. Speak life. "Have courage and be kind" - From the movie Cinderella (2015) You might just be the person someone else needs. We are here for each other and for a higher purpose. "To be human means to care for each other. Civilization means to work together to create a better life... The moment we stop fighting for each other, that's the moment that we lose our humanity..." - From the movie 2012 (2009) Stop fighting others. Work together. Some people want us to argue and fight and be divided. This is not the time for that. Our future depends on our hearts. Let your heart be healed. Let the beauty in your heart come out in a way that serves others more than it serves yourself.
