hey, wait

Jay Moon Fields

If being smart could give you a better experience of yourself—in your relationships, your work, your life—you'd already be there. But you're not. From the outside, things probably look good. But internally, something's off. You're over-explaining, over-giving, and over-functioning. You're second-guessing yourself anytime another person is in the room. And you're performing a version of "having it together" that doesn't actually feel like you. Hey, Wait is about interrupting that. Because those two words—hey, wait—are the moment fawning, people-pleasing, and self-abandonment lose their grip, and something different becomes possible. Hosted by a somatic coach, this show looks at what's actually driving your relational patterns—not just in your thoughts, but also in your nervous system, your conditioning, and your body. Through solo episodes and candid conversations with people who understand somatics, nervous system regulation, and energy medicine, you'll start to see what it takes to stop losing yourself around others—and start responding from something more real and whole in yourself. If you're sensitive, smart and tired of understanding your patterns but still ending up in them—you're in the right place.

  1. -6 дн.

    RE-RELEASE: Becoming Radically & Embarrassingly True to Yourself: with Nancy Dreyfus | #44

    You don't need to stand up for yourself. You need a "self". Saying "Hey, Wait" is just the beginning. The real magic? Learning how to actually speak from your own reality. If you've been with us from the start, then you already know how much Nancy Dreyfus means to Jay. She's been Jay's mentor for years, and has shaped so much of the "Hey, Wait" approach you've been hearing about. Think of Nancy as the "Yoda" of helping people get their insides to match their outsides. She's a psychotherapist, an author, and, more than anything, a deep well of wisdom. If this podcast has been resonating with you, you'll love this episode. It's packed with thoughtful insights and practical takeaways that'll help you get one step closer to being Radically and Embarrassingly True to Yourself. In this episode, you'll hear Nancy talk about: Why being authentic can feel both embarrassing and liberating How to stand in your truth and honor someone else's reality What it really means to "do the work" with your partner And how you'll start to notice your own growth when you take healing seriously Want to go deeper? Grab Nancy's book, Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love, and flip through the flashcards one by one. Don't just read them… say them out loud. Let the words settle into your body. Here's the link to grab the book. And don't forget to stay connected with Jay Moon Fields—check out jaymoonfields.com and follow along on Instagram. Got a question for the podcast? Send it in! You might just hear it in a future episode. Grab your free copy of The Hey, Wait Phrasebook: 12 Things to Say When You'd Normally Fawn, Freeze, or Fight - https://yourstruly.kit.com/0be0a7d69c Connect with Nancy Dreyfus: Official Website: https://nancydreyfus.com/  Nancy's Book: "Talk to Me Like I'm Someone You Love": https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0399162003/  Nancy's Psydbar Substack: https://nancydreyfus.substack.com/ Instagram: https://www.instahttps://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0399162003/ref=s9_simh_gw_p14_d1_i3gram.com/nancydreyfus_psyd/  Bluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/nancydreyfus.bsky.social  Connect with Jay: Official Website: https://jaymoonfields.com/ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heywaitwithjay/  "Yours Truly" Coaching Program: https://jaymoonfields.com/coaching Jay Moon Fields' Book "Teaching People Not Poses": https://www.amazon.com/Teaching-People-Not-Poses-Principles/dp/1478326913/ LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaymoonfields

    1 ч. 15 мин.
  2. 18 июн.

    When You're Not Who You Used to Be with Jay Moon Fields | Ep #43

    Listen in as Jay shares a deeply personal update about a recent health diagnosis and how it is requiring she shift everything in her life. If you are an overfunctioning woman exhausted by people-pleasing, hear why confusing a capacity problem with a discipline problem is costing you everything, and how to finally begin listening to your body. Jay Moon Fields is a Somatic coaching expert and the host of Hey, Wait, bringing deep insight into authentic living, embodiment, and aligning your insides with your outsides. In this episode, you'll hear: • How a surprising genetic diagnosis of dysautonomia and hEDS shifted everything and why body awareness is no longer optional. • Healing from people pleasing and why extreme physical feedback finally stopped the fawning response. • The crucial difference between a capacity problem and a discipline problem. • Using the "wave and ocean" metaphor to reconnect to your vaster self. • How awe can help you quiet your mind and regulate your nervous system. Resources Jay mentions in the show: Dr. Zac Spiritos: https://www.instagram.com/drzacspiritos/ Bendy Bodies Podcast: https://www.bendybodiespodcast.com/ Disjointed Book:  https://bookscouter.com/book/9781734794908-disjointed-navigating-the-diagnosis-and-management-of-hyperm For full resources, links, and to learn more about coaching, visit: https://jaymoonfields.com Support the show: https://buymeacoffee.com/jaymoonfields Grab your free copy of The Hey, Wait Phrasebook: 12 Things to Say When You'd Normally Fawn, Freeze, or Fight - https://yourstruly.kit.com/0be0a7d69c Credits: Produced by Viv – First Click VA | Original Music by Dalton Grant

    46 мин.
  3. 4 июн.

    From Fawning to Freedom: Reclaiming Your Wholeness with Dr. Ingrid Clayton | Episode 42

    Have you ever felt like you go missing in your own life to keep others comfortable? Fawning is an unconscious survival mechanism rooted in the nervous system that prioritizes someone else's happiness and demands over your own experience and boundaries. This episode features two fawners in recovery exploring how to break that trance, stop performing helpfulness, and start trusting your own internal compass. Dr. Ingrid Clayton is a therapist with a PhD in private practice and the author of the deeply personal book Fawning. She works with survivors of complex childhood trauma and brings deep insight into relational trauma, healing, and the messy, slow work of learning to unfawn. In this episode, Jay and Dr. Ingrid discuss: ► The crucial difference between genuine kindness or empathy and a fawning response driven by self-abandonment. ► Why chronic fawners often see other people's relational red flags as on-ramps to their own helpfulness. ► How clients, therapists, and coaches often unknowingly fawn with each other during professional sessions. ► How to tell the difference between staying in an asymmetrical relationship to do genuine healing work versus repeating a cycle of re-traumatization. ► The complexities of the "Let Them" theory and how it can sometimes embolden a trauma response instead of setting healthy boundaries. Learn more about Dr. Ingrid Clayton ► Substack:  https://ingridclaytonphd.substack.com/ ► Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/ingridclaytonphd If you loved this episode, please help get it to others by subscribing, rating the show, or sharing it with a friend! You can learn more about how to support Jay's work and the show at https://buymeacoffee.com/jaymoonfields Grab your free copy of The Hey, Wait Phrasebook: 12 Things to Say When You'd Normally Fawn, Freeze, or Fight - https://yourstruly.kit.com/0be0a7d69c Stay connected with Jay ► Website: https://jaymoonfields.com ► Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heywaitwithjay/ ►DIY Online Course to Support Unfawning: https://jaymoonfields.com/yours-truly ► 1:1 Coaching: https://jaymoonfields.com/coaching ► Book: https://www.amazon.com/less-lost-finding-yourself-ordinary/dp/B0FSDSG63B ► LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaymoonfields/ Have a question for the podcast? Send it in — it may be featured in a future episode.   Credits This podcast was produced by Viv – First Click VA. For podcast support, contact: viv@firstclickva.com For collaborations or general inquiries, contact: hello@jaymoonfields.com Original Music produced by Dalton Grant

    1 ч. 5 мин.
  4. 21 мая

    The Missing Link in Sexual Pleasure: Your Nervous System with Lisa West | Episode 41

    Have you ever wondered why it can be so hard to stay in your body during moments of intimacy? This episode explores the deep connection between your nervous system, your body, and your capacity for pleasure.  Lisa West is a physical therapist, bodyworker, and yoga practitioner of over 30 years and the author of the book Follow the Feeling, A Roadmap to Emotional Freedom. She has worked with clients navigating midlife, chronic pain, and trauma and brings deep insight into sexual medicine, pelvic health, and nervous system regulation. In this episode, Jay and Lisa discuss: ► The shift from constant upward, productive energy to honoring the downward-flowing energy (apana vayu) of the body. ► Why arousal requires a baseline parasympathetic (relaxed) state and how to find the sweet spot of flow between relaxation and stimulation. ► The misconception that pain during sex or pelvic exams is normal, and how pelvic floor physical therapy can help. ► The truth about women's arousal, including the fact that only about 30% of women can orgasm from penetration alone. ► Simple, fluid movements and grounding practices—like softening the jaw to access the pelvis—that help you stay present and connected to yourself. Learn more about Lisa West ► Website: https://lisawestwellness.com ► Instagram: @LisaYogini ► Other links: Follow the Feeling on Amazon and courses on Teachable If you loved this episode, please help get it to others by subscribing, rating the show, or sharing it with a friend! You can learn more about how to support Jay's work and the show at https://buymeacoffee.com/jaymoonfields Grab your free copy of The Hey, Wait Phrasebook: 12 Things to Say When You'd Normally Fawn, Freeze, or Fight - https://yourstruly.kit.com/0be0a7d69c Stay connected with Jay ► Website: https://jaymoonfields.com ► Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heywaitwithjay/ ► Books: https://www.amazon.com/less-lost-finding-yourself-ordinary/dp/B0FSDSG63B ► Coaching Program: https://jaymoonfields.com/coaching ► LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaymoonfields/ Have a question for the podcast? Send it in — it may be featured in a future episode.   Credits This podcast was produced by Viv – First Click VA. For podcast support, contact: viv@firstclickva.com For collaborations or general inquiries, contact: hello@jaymoonfields.com Original Music produced by Dalton Grant

    51 мин.
  5. 7 мая

    How to Stop People Pleasing And Emotional Outsourcing with Beatriz Albina | Episode 40

    People pleasing, perfectionism and codependence, oh my! Are you exhausted from constantly managing the people around you and performing for safety? If so, this is the episode you need if you want to stop looking outward for validation and actually feel safe being yourself. Beatriz Victoria Albina is a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner, Master Somatic Coach, and the author of the bestselling book End Emotional Outsourcing. She has worked with humans socialized as women looking to regulate their nervous systems and rewire their minds, and brings deep insight into untangling codependency, perfectionism and people pleasing. In this episode, Jay and Bea discuss: ► What "emotional outsourcing" really means and how it's a shame-free replacement term for codependent, perfectionist, and people-pleasing habits. ► The sneaky mixed nervous system state of "functional freeze," where you might look like an impressive, highly productive overachiever on the outside but are totally frozen to your feelings on the inside. ► Why you need to stop viewing these behaviors as individual character flaws and start celebrating them as the brilliant childhood survival skills they once were. ► How performing for self-worth and living in a constant state of panic might literally be messing with your poop and digestion (because science!). ► The game-changing difference between being self-aware and being self-referential, plus a sweet little somatic grounding practice to help you reconnect with the earth. Learn more about Beatriz Victoria Albina ► Website: https://beatrizalbina.com/ ► Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/beatrizvictoriaalbinanp ► YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@beavictoriaalbina ► Podcast: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/feminist-wellness/id1454980022 ► End Emotional Outsourcing Book: https://bookshop.org/p/books/end-emotional-outsourcing-how-to-overcome-your-codependent-perfectionist-and-people-pleasing-habits-beatriz-victoria-albina-np-mph-sep/54b675f3d3e5154a?ean=9781538766439&next=t If you loved this episode, please help get it to others by subscribing, rating the show, or sharing it with a friend! You can learn more about how to support Jay's work and the show at https://buymeacoffee.com/jaymoonfields Grab your free copy of The Hey, Wait Phrasebook: 12 Things to Say When You'd Normally Fawn, Freeze, or Fight - https://yourstruly.kit.com/0be0a7d69c Stay connected with Jay  ► Website: https://jaymoonfields.com ► Yours Truly Program: https://jaymoonfields.com/yours-truly (Code heywait-100 for $100 off!) ► Books: https://www.amazon.com/less-lost-finding-yourself-ordinary/dp/B0FSDSG63B ► Coaching: https://jaymoonfields.com/coaching ► Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heywaitwithjay/ ► LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaymoonfields/ Have a question for the podcast? Send it in — it may be featured in a future episode. Credits This podcast was produced by Viv – First Click VA. For podcast support, contact: viv@firstclickva.com For collaborations or general inquiries, contact: hello@jaymoonfields.com Original Music produced by Dalton Grant

    1 ч. 2 мин.
  6. 23 апр.

    The Real Reason You Feel Anxious About Money with Rahkim Sabree | Episode 39

    I used to think I was just "bad with money." After my divorce at 23, I walked away from everything and gave my ex-husband all my savings out of guilt, stepping into a money story defined by debt, scarcity, and shame. But now I understand that my problem wasn't a lack of financial literacy—it was financial trauma, and if you've ever felt a tightness in your chest when checking your bank account, or felt anxiety even though you have "enough" on paper, this episode explores how your relationship with money is often actually about safety, identity, and your nervous system trying to protect you. Rahkim Sabree is a financial therapist, Accredited Financial Counselor (AFC®), Trauma of Money Certified Practitioner, TEDx Speaker, and the author of Overcoming Financial Trauma. He has worked with individuals, corporate teams, HR professionals, and financial advisors, and brings deep insight into bridging the gap between financial literacy and trauma-informed care. In this episode, Jay and Rahkim discuss: ► Why financial advice often feels incomplete, and the difference between financial therapy and financial planning.  ► Why you're not "bad with money"—and why your perceived "bad decisions" are actually normal nervous system responses to abnormal circumstances.  ► How fight, flight, freeze, and fawn show up in your daily money behaviors, from overworking to actively avoiding your bank account.  ► The ways jobs, hustle culture, and entrepreneurial ventures can reinforce financial trauma.  ► What it sounds like to actually set financial boundaries, talk about money more honestly, and find healing in community rather than isolation. Learn more about Rahkim Sabree ►Instagram: @rahkimsabree ►Website: Overcomingfinancialtrauma.com ►Substack: Rahkimsabree.substack.com   If you loved this episode, please help get it to others by subscribing, rating the show, or sharing it with a friend! You can learn more about how to support Jay's work and the show at https://buymeacoffee.com/jaymoonfields Grab your free copy of The Hey, Wait Phrasebook: 12 Things to Say When You'd Normally Fawn, Freeze, or Fight - https://yourstruly.kit.com/0be0a7d69c Stay connected with Jay ► Website: https://jaymoonfields.com ► Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heywaitwithjay/ ► Books: https://www.amazon.com/less-lost-finding-yourself-ordinary/dp/B0FSDSG63B ► Coaching Program: https://jaymoonfields.com/coaching ► LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaymoonfields/ Have a question for the podcast? Send it in — it may be featured in a future episode. Credits This podcast was produced by Viv – First Click VA. For podcast support, contact: viv@firstclickva.com For collaborations or general inquiries, contact: hello@jaymoonfields.com Original Music produced by Dalton Grant

    59 мин.
  7. 9 апр.

    How to Read Your Nervous System Signals with Jay Moon Fields | Episode #38

    When life gets overwhelmingly "lifey," your nervous system might be sending you signals of perceived danger and threat. This episode explores the power of pausing to track the physical sensations happening in your body and offers a simple path to reconnect with the quiet, peaceful trust inside you. Jay Moon Fields is a coach and educator specializing in nervous system regulation and somatic awareness. She has worked extensively with successful professionals (who are also just ordinary people) to help them realign with their essential selves by first meeting themself at the physiological level. In this episode, Jay discusses: ► How to reconnect to trust when everything feels uncertain and you are consumed by fear ► The specific imagery that brings her back to a sense of calm every damn time ► How to track your nervous system in real time by paying attention to bodily sensations ► The distinct patterns of thoughts, physical sensations, and behaviors associated with the fight, flight, freeze, and fawn stress responses  ►A moment to reconnect with a sense of okness in your body ► Why the world desperately needs more regulated nervous systems right now and how you can be a part of it    Grab your free copy of The Hey, Wait Phrasebook: 12 Things to Say When You'd Normally Fawn, Freeze, or Fight - https://yourstruly.kit.com/0be0a7d69c   Learn more about Jay's Programs ► Website: https://jaymoonfields.com ► Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heywaitwithjay/ ► Books: https://www.amazon.com/less-lost-finding-yourself-ordinary/dp/B0FSDSG63B ► Coaching: https://jaymoonfields.com/coaching ► LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaymoonfields/ Have a question for the podcast?   Credits This podcast was produced by Viv – First Click VA. For podcast support, contact: viv@firstclickva.com For collaborations or general inquiries, contact: hello@jaymoonfields.com Original Music produced by Dalton Grant

    36 мин.
  8. 26 мар.

    Signs, Strengths + Struggles of Highly Sensitive People with Muriel Kosovsky | Episode #37

    You have pyrobably heard it your whole life: "You're too sensitive." If you feel things deeply, get overwhelmed easily, and notice every detail of everything, you might be wondering why you process the world with such extraordinary depth. Today we explore what it actually means to be a Highl Sensitive Person (HSP) and why it is a neurophysiological trait rather than a stress response. Muriel Kosovsky is a business owner and coach who has worked internationally for over two decades as a teacher, senior leader, and mentor to support highly sensitive leaders and contributors navigating the workplace. She's the author of the forthcoming book, HSPedia,  a comprehensive blueprint for highly sensitive people.  In this episode, Jay and Muriel Kosovsky discuss: ► The four levels of sensitivity that can be activated in highly sensitive people ► Why many HSPs struggle at work—and the kinds of support that actually help ► The non-negotiable qualities HSPs need for relationships to be sustainable and healthy ► The surprising variant of HSP that craves intensity, adventure, and even danger ► The one quality successful HSPs tend to organize their lives around   Learn more about Muriel Kosovsky ► LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/murielkosovsky/ ► Book waitlist and newsletter: https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSe9ByfcCz2jio8OxKhzWI68LxxfGKr6w3QUEXLUbQ2Fey1jFw/viewform If you loved this episode, please help get it to others by subscribing, rating the show, or sharing it with a friend! You can learn more about how to support Jay's work and the show at https://buymeacoffee.com/jaymoonfields Grab your free copy of The Hey, Wait Phrasebook: 12 Things to Say When You'd Normally Fawn, Freeze, or Fight - https://yourstruly.kit.com/0be0a7d69c Stay connected with Jay ► Website: https://jaymoonfields.com ► Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/heywaitwithjay/ ► Books: https://www.amazon.com/less-lost-finding-yourself-ordinary/dp/B0FSDSG63B ► Coaching Program: https://jaymoonfields.com/coaching ► LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/jaymoonfields/ Have a question for the podcast? Send it in — it may be featured in a future episode.   Credits This podcast was produced by Viv – First Click VA. For podcast support, contact: viv@firstclickva.com For collaborations or general inquiries, contact: hello@jaymoonfields.com Original Music produced by Dalton Grant

    52 мин.
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If being smart could give you a better experience of yourself—in your relationships, your work, your life—you'd already be there. But you're not. From the outside, things probably look good. But internally, something's off. You're over-explaining, over-giving, and over-functioning. You're second-guessing yourself anytime another person is in the room. And you're performing a version of "having it together" that doesn't actually feel like you. Hey, Wait is about interrupting that. Because those two words—hey, wait—are the moment fawning, people-pleasing, and self-abandonment lose their grip, and something different becomes possible. Hosted by a somatic coach, this show looks at what's actually driving your relational patterns—not just in your thoughts, but also in your nervous system, your conditioning, and your body. Through solo episodes and candid conversations with people who understand somatics, nervous system regulation, and energy medicine, you'll start to see what it takes to stop losing yourself around others—and start responding from something more real and whole in yourself. If you're sensitive, smart and tired of understanding your patterns but still ending up in them—you're in the right place.

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