24 episodes

Child loss, universally, has been called the single, most devastating experience a family can face. It is a very personal journey, with no handbook for survival. Sharing our stories of love and loss offers validation, hope, and healing. Join Monica and Colby Charette in a very unique, mother-and-son podcast, as they share their personal grief journey, and those of others, with intimate interviews each episode that offer powerful experiences, candid advice for friends, retrospective lessons learned, insight and encouragement, and everything in-between. If you have experienced child loss, or care about someone who has, we invite you to hold the light with us, and keep coming back for inspiration and hope.

Holding the Light Monica and Colby Charette

    • Society & Culture
    • 5.0 • 33 Ratings

Child loss, universally, has been called the single, most devastating experience a family can face. It is a very personal journey, with no handbook for survival. Sharing our stories of love and loss offers validation, hope, and healing. Join Monica and Colby Charette in a very unique, mother-and-son podcast, as they share their personal grief journey, and those of others, with intimate interviews each episode that offer powerful experiences, candid advice for friends, retrospective lessons learned, insight and encouragement, and everything in-between. If you have experienced child loss, or care about someone who has, we invite you to hold the light with us, and keep coming back for inspiration and hope.

    Annette McCoy: Coming to Terms with Suicide

    Annette McCoy: Coming to Terms with Suicide

    Suicide without warning is more common than we might think. Which is why Annette McCoy will never stop asking herself, “how did I not know?” Sometimes, even after years of searching, the answers just aren’t there.  Instead of focusing on how her only child died, she is coming to terms with it, by sharing her story and her endless love for Evan.  Turning that grief, into so beautifully honoring her child.     


    Noted in this podcast is the project “Evans Rocks Around the World.” To learn more, follow their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1242366296116297




    Holding the Light is an original, monthly podcast created and hosted by Monica and Colby Charette, and produced by Julia Vigue and Sophia Speeckaert. EMAIL US (shineoncass@gmail.com) with questions, comments, or a request to join us as a guest. We also welcome you to visit us at ShineOnCass (www.shineoncass.org) where our family continues to Shine the Light of Cassidy.

    Our podcast’s theme music is As Long As You Love (Scarlet Wings) written and sung by Cindy Bullens, from the album Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth produced by Blue Lobster Records (1999). Available on CD or download at www.cidnybullens.com. Mention Holding the Light Podcast and receive a signed copy.

    • 38 min
    Dawn Prime Watson: Surviving My Son's Suicide Without Blame

    Dawn Prime Watson: Surviving My Son's Suicide Without Blame

    Every day Dawn carries her heavy grief, alongside endless love for her son Krys, but she never carries the guilt or responsibility that often plague parents of child loss to suicide. In this podcast, this brave Mom candidly shares how the demons and drugs were bigger and stronger than her 30-year-old son.  Her peace comes in knowing he is safe, in loving the son he left behind, and helping others through life’s greatest loss.  Colby and I are honored to Hold the Light with Dawn Prime Watson.   
    *Important Show Note: This interview was recorded in June, 2023. The Sibling to Sibling organization created for siblings of suicide loss that Dawn discusses in this podcast, has since been dissolved. 
    Holding the Light is an original, monthly podcast created and hosted by Monica and Colby Charette, and produced by Julia Vigue and Sophia Speeckaert. EMAIL US (shineoncass@gmail.com) with questions, comments, or a request to join us as a guest. We also welcome you to visit us at ShineOnCass (www.shineoncass.org) where our family continues to Shine the Light of Cassidy.

    Our podcast’s theme music is As Long As You Love (Scarlet Wings) written and sung by Cindy Bullens, from the album Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth produced by Blue Lobster Records (1999). Available on CD or download at www.cidnybullens.com. Mention Holding the Light Podcast and receive a signed copy.

    • 1 hr 8 min
    Cidny Bullens: As Long As You Love (A special interview with our podcast theme song singer-songwriter, and fellow parent of child loss)

    Cidny Bullens: As Long As You Love (A special interview with our podcast theme song singer-songwriter, and fellow parent of child loss)

    In a very special interview, Colby and I had the complete joy and honor of talking with Cidny Bullens, a Grammy-nominated singer-songwriter, who is known for being a backup vocalist for Elton John, singing lead vocals on the Grease soundtrack, and has nine critically-acclaimed solo albums. Cid humbly shares how the deep grief of child loss transformed his life, in more ways than one—including influencing his decision to publicly come out as a transgender man, and the creation of an album in his daughter’s memory, that he says, is now his legacy. You won’t want to miss this conversation, or his amazing podcast performance of our theme song, As Long As You Love (Scarlet Wings).

    We were interviewed by WGME Fox Maine News reporter Adrienne Stein about our podcast “Holding the Light.” Watch for the airing soon!

    Cid’s new memoir: TransElectric, My Life as a Cosmic Rockstar is available for purchase on Amazon and at local bookstores.

    Visit the Cidney Bullens Website: cidnybullens.com for upcoming book readings and performances!

    Cidny’s Podcast: Cracking the Sky. A Conversation with Creatives is available wherever you listen to podcasts. 



    Holding the Light is an original, monthly podcast created and hosted by Monica and Colby Charette, and produced by Julia Vigue and Sophia Speeckaert. EMAIL US (shineoncass@gmail.com) with questions, comments, or a request to join us as a guest. We also welcome you to visit us at ShineOnCass (www.shineoncass.org) where our family continues to Shine the Light of Cassidy.

    Our podcast’s theme music is As Long As You Love (Scarlet Wings) written and sung by Cindy Bullens, from the album Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth produced by Blue Lobster Records (1999). Available on CD or download at www.cidnybullens.com. Mention Holding the Light Podcast and receive a signed copy.

    • 1 hr 2 min
    Tom Howard: A Father's Reflection on Grief & Healing

    Tom Howard: A Father's Reflection on Grief & Healing

    When your child dies by suicide, it presents unique circumstances that can intensify and sometimes prolong and complicate the grieving process for parents. Tom Howard is slowly reassembling the pieces of his own shattered life after the loss of his son, Eli.  He shares the mental health challenges his son  faced, as well as his personal reflection on how men and women grieve differently, and yet how we all have to accept the unacceptable. You’ll also learn how he finds strength in a 12-Step Program for Grief Recovery.

    To learn more about Eli Howard:
    https://vtdigger.org/obituary/eli-howard-athlete-musician-friend-and-son/

    https://www.facebook.com/people/Remembering-Eli-Howard/100063588310525/

    Downeast 12-Step Bereavement Support Group
    Held weekly hybrid, both in-person and on zoom, Thursdays at Noon
    www.paintedpepperfarm.me/mooscorner
    Holding the Light is an original, monthly podcast created and hosted by Monica and Colby Charette, and produced by Julia Vigue and Sophia Speeckaert. EMAIL US (shineoncass@gmail.com) with questions, comments, or a request to join us as a guest. We also welcome you to visit us at ShineOnCass (www.shineoncass.org) where our family continues to Shine the Light of Cassidy.

    Our podcast’s theme music is As Long As You Love (Scarlet Wings) written and sung by Cindy Bullens, from the album Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth produced by Blue Lobster Records (1999). Available on CD or download at www.cidnybullens.com. Mention Holding the Light Podcast and receive a signed copy.

    • 34 min
    Taryn Murray: Finding Personal Peace After Child Loss

    Taryn Murray: Finding Personal Peace After Child Loss

    It’s so hard to move forward after the loss of a child. Hard for grieving parents to find their place in the world; to maintain their role as a parent, a daughter, son, or friend. Remembering who  they  are, and what makes them happy. Taryn Murray takes us back to the heart- wrenching moment when she was told her 21-year-old son Jakob had died in a motorcycle accident. She shares the challenges of balancing grief with parenting her daughter, and how she is finding peace in her own life.  

    To support the Jake Murray Memorial Scholarship: 
    Mail checks to:
    Jake Murray Memorial Scholarship Fund
    Downeast Federal Credit Union
    211 Main Street,  Machias, ME  04654 
    Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/jakemurraymemorialfoundation
    Or make a gift to the Jake Murray Go Fund Me: 
    https://gofund.me/80cda563
    Holding the Light is an original, monthly podcast created and hosted by Monica and Colby Charette, and produced by Julia Vigue and Sophia Speeckaert. EMAIL US (shineoncass@gmail.com) with questions, comments, or a request to join us as a guest. We also welcome you to visit us at ShineOnCass (www.shineoncass.org) where our family continues to Shine the Light of Cassidy.

    Our podcast’s theme music is As Long As You Love (Scarlet Wings) written and sung by Cindy Bullens, from the album Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth produced by Blue Lobster Records (1999). Available on CD or download at www.cidnybullens.com. Mention Holding the Light Podcast and receive a signed copy.

    • 42 min
    Kirstie Martin: Grief & My Mental Well-Being

    Kirstie Martin: Grief & My Mental Well-Being

    When you are suffering with the most difficult grief of child loss, in your deepest despair, you sometimes question your mental well-being. But how do you know when grief becomes a mental health crisis? Kirstie Martin knew the difference one day, and sought help that saved her life.  We are humbled to share her brave story, and celebrate the love and legacy of her son, Brady. 

    Kirstie is the founder of Maine Angel Moms, a private Facebook page for grieving Maine mothers. https://www.facebook.com/groups/440927923822597

    988 is the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline,  active across the United States. When people call, text, or chat 988, they will be connected to trained counselors who will listen, provide support, and connect people in crisis to resources if necessary.

    866-771-9276 is  the International Warm Line, referenced in this podcast. It is a mental health peer-to-peer phone support line for adults, aged 18 and older, offering mutual conversations with a trained peer specialist who has life experience with mental health recovery.


    Holding the Light is an original, monthly podcast created and hosted by Monica and Colby Charette, and produced by Julia Vigue and Sophia Speeckaert. EMAIL US (shineoncass@gmail.com) with questions, comments, or a request to join us as a guest. We also welcome you to visit us at ShineOnCass (www.shineoncass.org) where our family continues to Shine the Light of Cassidy.

    Our podcast’s theme music is As Long As You Love (Scarlet Wings) written and sung by Cindy Bullens, from the album Somewhere Between Heaven and Earth produced by Blue Lobster Records (1999). Available on CD or download at www.cidnybullens.com. Mention Holding the Light Podcast and receive a signed copy.

    • 47 min

Customer Reviews

5.0 out of 5
33 Ratings

33 Ratings

DawnPrimeWatson ,

Holding the Light

I wish I could give you a million stars.
Thank you Monica and Colby, for sharing your stories and for inviting others to share theirs.
The authenticity, love, and grief captured in your interviews is painfully palpable. The symbolism of Holding the Light provides hope and comfort as I navigate the loss of my oldest son. I will forever love, grieve, wish he was here, and wonder why he is not. Through the chaos, holding his light is a lovely way to honor him. Well done and many thanks.
Dawn - Krys' Mom

A1charland ,

9.10.23. Episode

This episode has been one of my favorites so far. The part where he sings at the end gives me the chills. Thank you Monica and Colby for putting yourselves out there to honor Cass’s light. You guys are awesome.

OCACLEC ,

Holding the Light - Cidny Bullens

It’s real. It’s raw. It’s necessary. Truly heartwarming to learn the story behind the Holding the Light Podcast theme song. To share your grief openly takes incredible strength and courage. Monica and Colby Charette provide a safe place for people to share their grief journey. Bravo.

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