Honestly, Dear Listener

Honestly, Dear Listener
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Honestly, Dear Listener

Being a creative person is tough.  We want to make cool things, but then life hits us with insecurity, rejection, schedules, etc. How do we push past all the noise and make the things that light us up?  Welcome, Dear Listener, to a space where it's okay to ask questions and dive deep into the world of fear, creativity, and the roadblocks that get in the way of us busting forth with creativity energy. We're a couple of weirdos who want to talk about the hard things with you, so welcome to our living room--pull up a chair, cover up with a cozy blanket, and let's get started.  Honestly, Dear Listener is a weekly podcast hosted by Emily Hatch and Carrie Schaeffer.

  1. 80: Let the Bodies Keep the Score 04.18.25

    APR 18

    80: Let the Bodies Keep the Score 04.18.25

    This week on Honestly, Dear Listener, we’re talking about bodies—how we ignore them, how they yell at us when we do, and what it actually means to be embodied (especially for those of us who grew up thinking our bodies were the enemy). From panic attacks to protein charts, poop habits to dance breaks, we’re getting real about the messy, beautiful, annoying work of coming home to ourselves—one hard-boiled egg at a time. ____________________________________________________________ A Note from Carrie Hey, Dear Listener—it’s Carrie. If you’ve ever found yourself nodding along with the show and thought, “I wish I had someone to help me make sense of where I'm at,” well… hi! I happen to be a certified life coach, and I work with artists just like you who might feel a little stuck, a little swirly, or just want some help finding the next right step. I’m opening up a couple more spots for artists who want support and structure in their creative work, and I would love to help you reach your goals. To learn more, visit honestlydearlistener.com/coaching. Don’t worry, Dear Listener—we’ve got this. ____________________________________________________________ References: Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle - book by Emily Nagoski & Amelia Nagoski Holy Hurt: Understanding Spiritual Trauma and the Process of Healing - book by Hillary L. McBride The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma - book by Bessel van der Kolk TIMECODES0:00 - Intro2:14 - Bodies & High Control Religion™️ 10:28 - Women Ignoring their Needs (Bodily Included)13:36 - How Panic Attacks are Helpful?28:39 - How Do We Heal?31:14 - Self-Trust: THE KEY40:54 - Things We Can Do to Strengthen Our Relationship with Our Bodies

    49 min
  2. 79: Rewind & Reset: When the Suck Fights Back - Q2 Goals 04.04.25

    APR 4

    79: Rewind & Reset: When the Suck Fights Back - Q2 Goals 04.04.25

    📣 Big Fat Announcement! 📣 Starting Friday, April 18, Honestly, Dear Listener will be moving to a bi-weekly release schedule—that’s every other Friday instead of every single one. Why? Because as much as we love creating this podcast, we’re also navigating real human schedules, creative projects, family life, grief, growth, and all the glorious mess in between. And we’re practicing what we preach: realistic expectations, nervous system kindness, and sustainable creativity. So don’t worry—we’re not going anywhere. We’re just giving ourselves (and you) a little more breathing room. Same vibes, same chaos, slightly more spacious pacing. Mark your calendars: New episodes every other Friday starting April 18. And in the meantime, hydrate, chase your side quests, and tell perfectionist pants-face to take a nap. With love and fewer deadlines, Carrie & Emily 🎙️💕 In this episode, we cover: 💥 Our Q1 goals—what we smashed (and what smashed us) 🎭 Emily’s dramatic arc from “first draft” to “I quit” to “wait… cabaret?” 🧠 Carrie’s ADHD brain vs. perfectionism vs. moving boxes 💌 Rediscovering old chapel notes and decoding middle school crushes (Jim Carrey?!) 🧩 Embracing misery, perfectionist parts, and nervous system meltdowns 🧘‍♀️ Shame spirals, grief, and asking your inner critic to please just shush for a minute 🛠️ Setting doable, measurable Q2 goals using a “12-week year” approach 🩰 Our goals for Q2 2025 ✨ Why surviving might be the bravest goal of all References: • Ep 72: We’re All Biased. Now What? • Ep 74: We’re All Out of Energy Coins • Ep 75: Love Yourself, Asshole, and Other Mysteries The 12 Week Year: Get More Done in 12 Weeks than Others Do in 12 Months - book by Brian P. Moran and Michael Lennington Internal Family Systems (IFS) - aka parts work Teeline Shorthand Let’s Love Teeline Together - online Teeline shorthand resource Carrie uses Piano Marvel - music piano sight-reading app Carrie uses TIMECODES0:00 - Intro2:36 - Q1 Goals Rewind31:20 - Q2 Goals Reset40:19 - A MAJOR ANNOUNCEMENT!

    42 min
  3. 78: From the Archive: How the Patriarchy Hurts Artists with Rachel Darden (Originally aired 01.26.24)

    MAR 28

    78: From the Archive: How the Patriarchy Hurts Artists with Rachel Darden (Originally aired 01.26.24)

    Today on Honestly, Dear Listener, we are unpacking what the heck “the patriarchy” even means, how it hurts artists, and what YOU can do to dismantle it. Joining us today is Carrie’s childhood friend Rachel Darden, a working actor known not only for her talent but also for her keen observations on the state of the arts. From storytelling shackled by skewed representation to the invisibility of aging women, the patriarchy has left its mark on creativity. Today, we'll explore the need for diverse stories and authentic female portrayals in an industry often blinded by gender biases. We also discuss how the patriarchy is hurtful for men and what all genders can do to recognize and counteract the patriarchy in their art and in their own lives. Prepare to rethink what it means to be a feminine creator in a world stubbornly molded for the masculine narrative. We're unpacking it all—aging, sexism, representation, and the resilience of womanhood. Where You Can Find Rachel: TikTok - @likely_nauseated Instagram - @likely__nauseated References: “Last F*ckable Day” - Inside Amy Schumer The Mary Tyler Moore Show streaming on HuluBeing Mary Tyler Moore Documentary on MAX

    49 min
  4. 77: From the Vault: Can We Motivate Ourselves without Kicking Our Own Butts? with Amber Mogg Cathey (Originally aired 10.04.24)

    MAR 20

    77: From the Vault: Can We Motivate Ourselves without Kicking Our Own Butts? with Amber Mogg Cathey (Originally aired 10.04.24)

    We’re diving into our vault and pulling out episodes we want to make sure you don’t miss! Here’s a gem from October 2024 talking with our friend, Amber Mogg Cathey of Evolve Vocal Studio, about how we can motivate ourselves with kindness. It’s our first episode of Season 4! This week on Honestly, Dear Listener, we welcome vocalist, voice coach, friend, and frequent contributor to the show Amber Mogg Cathey back to the podcast. We discuss our strategies for how to positively motivate ourselves instead of what comes naturally to us: kicking our own butts into submission. We talk about positive versus negative motivations and how effective each is at motivating us. We also discuss what it’s like being the kid who stuck out and how we felt like, in order to escape the scrutiny of others, we took our own selves down a peg or two which only ended up hurting our self-esteem. Where to Find Amber: Website: evolvevocalstudio.comInstagram: @EvolveVocalStudioYouTube:  @EvolveVocalStudio  Facebook: @EvolveVocalStudioTikTok: @EvolveVocalStudio Listen to our past episode with Amber HERE!We’re diving into our vault and pulling out episodes we want to make sure you don’t miss! Here’s a gem from October 2024 talking with our friend, Amber Mogg Cathey of Evolve Vocal Studio, about how we can motivate ourselves with kindness. It’s our first episode of Season 4! This week on Honestly, Dear Listener, we welcome vocalist, voice coach, friend, and frequent contributor to the show Amber Mogg Cathey back to the podcast. We discuss our strategies for how to positively motivate ourselves instead of what comes naturally to us: kicking our own butts into submission. We talk about positive versus negative motivations and how effective each is at motivating us. We also discuss what it’s like being the kid who stuck out and how we felt like, in order to escape the scrutiny of others, we took our own selves down a peg or two which only ended up hurting our self-esteem. Where to Find Amber: Website: evolvevocalstudio.comInstagram: @EvolveVocalStudioYouTube:  @EvolveVocalStudio  Facebook: @EvolveVocalStudioTikTok: @EvolveVocalStudio Listen to our past episode with Amber HERE! References: The Artist’s Way: A Spiritual Path to Higher Creativity, book by Julia Cameron “51: Finding Our Creative Identity with Gemma Sugrue 09.20.24” - Honestly, Dear Listener episode Season 3, Episode 51 TIMECODES:0:00 - Intro1:04 - Amber intro & WE’RE NOW IN SEASON 4!2:34 - Motivating ourselves while not kicking our own butts11:17 - Filled up with ourselves/self-centering20:42 - Toward and away motivations27:57 - Steps to catching and changing negative motivations

    48 min
  5. 76: From Christian Cubicles to Cosmic Manifestation: Asking for More than Permission 03.14.25

    MAR 14

    76: From Christian Cubicles to Cosmic Manifestation: Asking for More than Permission 03.14.25

    Ever been stuck in a tiny cubicle, staring at a fluorescent light, memorizing alternative history while yearning for human connection? Welcome to our private Christian school experience. This week, we take you back to the rigid world of goal charts, scripture memorization, and cubicle learning, where asking for help required raising tiny American and Christian flags—and asking for more wasn’t an option. But what happens when you finally unlearn that conditioning? Emily shares how she accidentally manifested a band and a gig, sparking a deep dive into the fear of wanting, why women struggle to ask for more, and how creativity thrives when we allow ourselves to receive. We also explore a big question: What if the opportunities we want were always there, but we were taught to believe we didn’t deserve them? Plus, a teaser for next week: What if your body already knows what you want, even when your brain doesn’t? Tune in for laughs, existential revelations, and a little manifestation magic as we break out of Christian cubicles and into cosmic possibilities. References: Somebody Somewhere - TV show on HBO The Secret - book by Rhonda Byrne TIMECODES0:00 Intro0:31 - Our fundamentalist private Christian school woes13:50 - About the last two weeks…15:34 - Let’s talk about manifestation20:05 - Getting out in the world28:27 - Manifestation: where do I start?33:12 - “It’s scary to want.”35:17 - Contentment vs. satisfaction39:12 - Next steps Check out our episodes about spiritual deconstruction/fundamentalism: 21: How Fundamentalism STILL Affects How We Create PART 1 02.09.24 22: How Fundamentalism STILL Affects How We Create PART 2 02.16.24 59: Fundamentalism, Mental Health, and Creativity 11.15.24 64: Panic, Prayer, and Prozac: Our Mental Health Adventures! Part 1 12.20.24 65: Panic, Prayer, and Prozac: Our Mental Health Adventures! Part 2 12.27.24

    48 min
  6. 75: "Love Yourself, Asshole" and Other Mysteries 03.07.25

    MAR 7

    75: "Love Yourself, Asshole" and Other Mysteries 03.07.25

    Ever feel like the world is on fire, your creative energy is on life support, and the certainty you once clung to—faith, government, the idea that adults know what they’re doing—was all an illusion? Yeah, us too. This week, we’re getting real about the existential free-fall of realizing certainty was never actually real, the shame spiral that comes with feeling too much, and the struggle to carve out small pockets of joy without guilt. Along the way, we unpack the absurdity of self-directed cruelty (love yourself, you a*****e), the tension between being informed and completely overwhelmed, and why questioning everything doesn’t mean you’re failing—it means you’re alive. Buckle up for brutal honesty, questionable metaphors, and maybe, just maybe, a little hope. References: “Thinking Out Loud” - song by Ed Sheeran TIMECODES0:00 Intro0:33 - We’re the fun ones. So why don’t I feel fun?5:23 - Invalidating our own painful feelings/feeling shame for feelings12:16 - Fundamentalist upbringing contributing to feeling shame for feelings13:087 - Uncertainty vs. uncertainty22:34 - Finding balance between wallowing and purposefully ignorant24:52 - “Love yourself, a*****e!”26:18 - Access to information is a double-edged sword Check out our episodes about spiritual deconstruction/fundamentalism: 21: How Fundamentalism STILL Affects How We Create PART 1 02.09.24 22: How Fundamentalism STILL Affects How We Create PART 2 02.16.24 59: Fundamentalism, Mental Health, and Creativity 11.15.24 64: Panic, Prayer, and Prozac: Our Mental Health Adventures! Part 1 12.20.24 65: Panic, Prayer, and Prozac: Our Mental Health Adventures! Part 2 12.27.24

    33 min
  7. 74: We’re Out of Energy Coins: What to Do When You’ve Got Nothing” 02.28.25

    FEB 28

    74: We’re Out of Energy Coins: What to Do When You’ve Got Nothing” 02.28.25

    In this week’s episode of Honestly, Dear Listener, we talk about showing up in the middle of neither of us being okay. We talk about how our creative energy—heck, our energy in general—is like a coin, an “energy coin” and how we spend it on mental and emotional resources, sometimes on creativity and connection, and other times on self-criticism and fear. We discuss the struggle of self-trust, the reality of creative burnout, and the challenge of accepting that some days, we simply don’t have the coins. Along the way, we acknowledge the privilege of rest, the cost of overextending, and the importance of grace in a world that demands constant output. If you’re feeling depleted, this episode is a reminder that self-compassion is an investment worth making. TIMECODES0:00 Intro2:00 - Collectively, we’re not okay3:25 - Let’s talk about creative energy coins!5:41 - We spend our coins positively and negatively9:04 - We believe we have (or SHOULD have) unlimited coins18:01 - Buying things on credit/overdrafting/mental health! Check out our episodes about spiritual deconstruction/fundamentalism: 21: How Fundamentalism STILL Affects How We Create PART 1 02.09.24 22: How Fundamentalism STILL Affects How We Create PART 2 02.16.24 59: Fundamentalism, Mental Health, and Creativity 11.15.24 64: Panic, Prayer, and Prozac: Our Mental Health Adventures! Part 1 12.20.24 65: Panic, Prayer, and Prozac: Our Mental Health Adventures! Part 2 12.27.24

    25 min
  8. 73: The Art of Reinvention: Because Artists Get Unlimited Costume Changes 02.21.25

    FEB 21

    73: The Art of Reinvention: Because Artists Get Unlimited Costume Changes 02.21.25

    Who says artists have to pick one identity and stick to it forever? Creativity is about curiosity, exploration, and—let’s be honest—trying on new looks like an unhinged fashion season. In this episode, we’re talking about reinvention—not as a brand strategy, but as an artist’s natural evolution. Your creative identity isn’t a fixed logo—it’s a closet full of possibilities. Some seasons, you’re all about red bows and high-waisted belts; next season, maybe it’s neon crocs and mismatched socks. The point? You get to change. So, let’s embrace the freedom to evolve and celebrate the endless costume changes that come with making art. References: Beyonce Wins Best Country Album at the 2025 Grammys “Love Song” by Sara Bareilles Lizzo Declares a New Era Follow Us on Spotify! Please Consider Giving Us 5 Stars on Apple Podcast TIMECODES: 0:00 - Intro 0:36 - Artists as Brands 6:03 - How do we know ourselves without having experimented with ourselves? 7:40 - Artist’s have to have freedom 8:02 - Reinvention as fashion seasons 20:41 - Art is playing dress-up Check out our episodes about spiritual deconstruction/fundamentalism: 21: How Fundamentalism STILL Affects How We Create PART 1 02.09.24 22: How Fundamentalism STILL Affects How We Create PART 2 02.16.24 59: Fundamentalism, Mental Health, and Creativity 11.15.24 64: Panic, Prayer, and Prozac: Our Mental Health Adventures! Part 1 12.20.24 65: Panic, Prayer, and Prozac: Our Mental Health Adventures! Part 2 12.27.24

    30 min
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    5
    out of 5
    7 Ratings

    About

    Being a creative person is tough.  We want to make cool things, but then life hits us with insecurity, rejection, schedules, etc. How do we push past all the noise and make the things that light us up?  Welcome, Dear Listener, to a space where it's okay to ask questions and dive deep into the world of fear, creativity, and the roadblocks that get in the way of us busting forth with creativity energy. We're a couple of weirdos who want to talk about the hard things with you, so welcome to our living room--pull up a chair, cover up with a cozy blanket, and let's get started.  Honestly, Dear Listener is a weekly podcast hosted by Emily Hatch and Carrie Schaeffer.

    Information

    • Creator
      Honestly, Dear Listener
    • Years Active
      2014 - 2025
    • Episodes
      93
    • Rating
      Explicit
    • Copyright
      © Honestly, Dear Listener
    • Show Website
      Honestly, Dear Listener

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