Hot Mess Magic

Michelle Burke
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The podcast for people tired of being told to heal, optimize, and “do the work” when the real work is admitting what you already know but refuse to act on. Hosted by Michelle Burke, keynote speaker and author who doesn’t inspire people to feel better. She exposes what high-performers hide behind: self-awareness replacing action, resilience enabling tolerance, and growth as another way to avoid deciding. If you’ve ever thought, “I know exactly what I need to do, so why am I not doing it?” this is the conversation. No performative breakthroughs. No encouragement. Just the truth about why smart, capable people stay stuck and what finally forces a decision. New episodes weekly. Connect on IG @michelleaburke 5 Star rating on Apple Podcasts

  1. JAN 28

    Faith Doesn’t Work Anymore | Infertility and Burnout

    This episode examines what happens when faith stops feeling grounding and starts feeling like pressure. Stephanie Dingbaum shares her seven-year fertility journey, including the moments when hope became harder to hold than letting go, and what it cost to keep believing while the answer stayed no. The conversation explores spiritual bypassing, burnout, and what happens when surrender stops feeling like strength and starts feeling like loss. What This Episode Covers: Why faith can feel fake when nothing changes year after yearHow spiritual bypassing shows up during infertilityThe emotional cost of staying grateful while still waitingHow burnout and nervous system overload affect desire and capacityWhat changed when she stopped gripping the outcome Guest: Stefanie Dingbaum is a therapist and podcast host who spent seven years navigating infertility before becoming a mother. Her experience reshaped how she understands faith, surrender, and trust. Connect: Michelle @michelleaburke Stefanie @stefanie.dingbaum Keywords: faith stops working, infertility and faith, spiritual bypassing infertility, seven year fertility journey, surrender feels like giving up, why faith feels fake, burnout and infertility, nervous system and fertility, identity crisis infertility, manifesting when nothing works, hot mess magic podcast

    28 min

  2. JAN 23

    Why Am I Confused? You’re Not. You’re Ignoring What You Know.

    Why Am I Confused? You’re Not. You’re Ignoring What You Know I used to say I was confused. About relationships. Money. Work. Why my nervous system was always on edge. But I was not confused. I knew. I knew when my chest tightened the second I walked into certain rooms. I knew when my stomach dropped every time I said yes to something that felt wrong. I knew when my body was exhausted but my mouth kept saying, “I’m fine.” This episode of Hot Mess Magic is about that pattern. The one where you already know what needs to change but keep calling it confusion, anxiety, or being in process. Burnout is not the problem. Anxiety is not the problem. They are the receipt. This is not motivation. This is the truth about why feeling stuck has nothing to do with clarity and everything to do with avoiding a decision. This Episode Is For People who feel stuck but successfulAnyone outgrowing their lifeListeners thinking “I don’t know who I am anymore”High functioning humans ignoring their intuitionPeople with self awareness but no movement What You’ll Hear Why confusion is often avoidanceHow ignoring your body creates burnout and anxietyThe real cost of indecisionWhy self trust is not a feeling but a choice Burke Bombs “The mess isn’t that you don’t have clarity. The mess is that you keep ignoring it.” “My body wasn’t broken. It was responding to a life that was out of integrity.” “Self trust isn’t a feeling. It’s a choice.” If this episode landed, follow the show and share it with someone who already knows what they’re avoiding. I’m Michelle Burke. You can find me on Instagram @michelleaburke. And this is Hot Mess Magic. Keywords why am I confused, feeling stuck but successful, outgrowing your life, I don’t know who I am anymore, midlife identity crisis, burnout and anxiety meaning, ignoring intuition, self trust, self awareness without change, Hot Mess Magic

    9 min

  3. JAN 14

    Why Dating Is So Hard: Rock Bottom at 30 & the Life You're Pretending to Live

    Why You Can’t Find Real Connection (And What It’s Costing You) with Joel Monteleone Joel Monteleone spent 15 years as the charismatic guy with the stories, the one everyone loved to be around. Until he got beaten under a bridge at 4am, told his friends, and they laughed. That was the moment he realized his entire existence was entertainment. At 29, his priorities looked exactly like they did at 19. Party. Meet people. Sleep with women. Make money. He wasn’t living. He was performing. This episode is for anyone who feels lost at 30. For anyone who can’t find real connection. For anyone who knows they’ve become a character in their own life instead of the author. It’s a conversation about identity collapse, reinventing yourself in your 30s, sobriety, and what it actually takes to stop hiding behind charisma and start building a real life. Who This Episode Is For Anyone saying they “can’t find connection” but won’t look at whyAnyone performing instead of livingThe life-of-the-party who feels empty when the room goes quietPeople whose priorities at 30 look exactly like they did at 20Anyone hiding behind humor, charm, or the “I’m fine” mask If you’ve ever thought “I feel lost, but my life looks fine,” this is for you. What Gets Exposed Why your friends laughing at your rock bottom is feedback, not friendshipThe 18-month identity death nobody talks aboutWhy “there’s no good people left” is a victim conversationWhy you can’t meet someone at depth if you won’t meet yourself there firstWhy dating feels like a job interview when you’re performingThe cost of being everyone’s entertainmentHow fear gets bigger than vision when you choose comfort over change What You’ll Hear in This Episode[00:00] The Night Everything Broke Open Joel gets beaten under a bridge at 4am. Drunk. Alone. Phone stolen. His friends laugh when he tells the story because he’s “that guy.” The moment he realizes he’s a jester, not a man anyone takes seriously. [05:00] When Your Priorities at 30 Look Like Your Priorities at 20 At 29, Joel sees his life clearly. How much can I party? How many people can I meet? How many women can I sleep with? How much money can I make? That was it. The same questions at 19 and 29. He decides his 39 has to look different. [07:00] Killing Your Old Identity Waking up early so he can’t stay out late. Working out. Losing friendships. For 15 years people knew him one way. Now he’s killing off the version of him they loved. The 18-month purgatory of trying to be both. [09:00] Discovering Life Outside the Bar Realizing people play volleyball on Friday nights at 11pm. Thinking, “There are people just doing this?” Understanding that not everyone lives at the bar. That other lives exist. [10:00] Building Hot Takes Hot Dates Creating a comedy-dating experience rooted in authenticity, vulnerability, and connection. Seeing himself as a burned-out, drinking tech salesperson and needing to close the gap to the man he wanted to be. The ego deaths. The LinkedIn pulls. The “should I just get another job” moments. [15:00] Why You Can’t Find Real Connection Why “there’s no good men” is a victim conversation. Why you don’t need all of them, you only need one. Why you can’t meet someone at depth unless you meet yourself there first. The hard truth: you are the common denominator. [18:00] Why Dating Feels Like an Interview When you filter yourself, perform, and say only what you think someone wants to hear, connection dies. Real attraction shows up when you stop managing perception and...

    26 min

  4. JAN 7

    The Three Excuses Keeping You Stuck in 2026

    The Truth You’ve Been Avoiding If you feel stuck but successful, if you know you’ve outgrown your life, if you’ve quietly thought “I don’t know who I am anymore” while telling everyone you’re “still processing,” this episode is for you. This episode of Hot Mess Magic is not emotional support audio. It is a mirror. The kind that doesn’t care how you feel about what it shows you. This is a personal transformation podcast for people in the middle of an identity shift. For the ones in midlife reinvention. For leaders, creators, and high-functioning humans who know their life no longer fits and keep calling fear “timing.” No motivation. No softness. Just the truth about why you’re still stuck and what it actually costs to change. What This Episode Exposes0:00–2:00 | The Setup 2026 isn’t a reset. It’s a reckoning. The quiet kind. The kind where you realize you’ve been intellectually procrastinating for years and calling it “self-work.” Michelle Burke opens Hot Mess Magic with one message: if you’re here to feel seen without changing anything, leave. 2:00–9:30 | The Three Excuses Ruining Your Life This is where it burns. Michelle dismantles the three most common phrases used by people who’ve outgrown their life but won’t move: “I’m still processing.”No. You’re stalling. Process has movement. Years of “working through it” without change isn’t growth. It’s fear with better branding.“I’m waiting for clarity.”Clarity doesn’t come first. Action does. If you’re waiting to feel clear before moving, you’re waiting for permission to avoid consequences.“I don’t have the capacity.”Translation: you don’t want to prioritize this. Capacity isn’t found. It’s assigned. You make time for what matters. 9:30–12:00 | The Real Reason You’re Stuck Most people aren’t afraid of failing. They’re afraid of losing their favorite coping mechanism: complaining. Once you decide, you lose the right to narrate your suffering. Once you act, you have to live in the results. Self-awareness without execution is just another way to stay safe. And safety is the enemy of reinvention. This year doesn’t reward potential. It rewards execution. This Episode Is ForPeople who feel stuck but successfulLeaders and entrepreneurs who’ve outgrown their identityAnyone in a midlife awakening or reinvention phaseListeners tired of spiritual bypassing and empty self-helpHumans ready to stop performing and start choosing Who Shouldn’t ListenAnyone looking for motivation or “good vibes only” energyPeople who want their feelings protected while avoiding responsibilityListeners who want permission to stay comfortable Burke Bombs“Reflection without action is just intellectual procrastination.” “Growth closes doors. That’s the point.” “Clarity shows up for people willing to be wrong.” “Self-awareness without execution is just another way to stay safe.” “Once you choose, you lose the right to narrate your suffering.” What Hot Mess Magic IsThis podcast is not a comfort zone. It is a personal transformation podcast for people in identity collapse, reinvention, and becoming. Some episodes will piss you off. Some will make you uncomfortable. Some will make you want to turn it off. Good. That’s how you know something real landed. Welcome to 2026. This is Hot Mess Magic. We stop pretending. We start deciding. If this episode triggered you, press thumbs down and tell me why. If it landed,...

    12 min

  5. 12/24/2025

    From $500 and Homeless to Debt-Free: The Real Story of Rock Bottom

    Let's face it: rock bottom doesn't come with a roadmap, and nobody tells you what survival actually costs. You already know this, even if you haven't wanted to admit it. Here's the thing—you've been trying to skip the hard part, distract yourself out of grief, or accomplish your way out of sadness, and it's keeping you stuck in the same goddamn spot with heavier emotions every time. In this episode of Hot Mess Magic, Angela Gentile exposes what it actually took to get out of $20,000 in debt while homeless, grieving, and working seven jobs and why you can't bypass the feelings no matter how many yoga retreats you book. This isn't about bouncing back. It's about sitting in the suck until you're ready to rebuild. You're not alone. Your people are here. IS THIS EPISODE FOR YOU? Listen if you're: Stuck in survival mode with no idea when it gets easierSwimming in debt and need to hear it's actually possible to get outGrieving something—a person, a pet, or the life you thought you'd haveExhausted from listening to advice from people whose lives you don't wantLiving alone for the first time (or wanting to) and need validationDone with the "shoulds" and ready to live on your own terms This episode is for people who are ready to admit they're in their sad girl era and go through it—not around it. WHAT GETS EXPOSED What survival mode actually looks like when you're working seven jobs and living in a basementThe brutal commitment it takes to get out of $20,000 of debt in 10 monthsWhy you can't bypass grief—not with yoga retreats, not with a new business, not with a partnerThe relief of finally having a soft place to land after years of chaosWhy listening to advice from people whose lives you don't want is a waste of time BURKE BOMBS 💣 💣 "The only way out of your sad girl era is to honestly and authentically recognize that you're in it and go through it. You have to feel it. You gotta be on your knees. You gotta be knocked down, dragged out, emotional. It has to be fucking uncomfortable. And you have to go through it." 💣 "People will only give you advice from their own vantage point and their own life experience. So if you're around people whose lives you don't want, I don't know why we're listening to their opinion." 💣 "When you love someone or something deeply, you will do whatever you need to do to stop them from suffering. You will take it all on to make sure that they only know joy." QUESTIONS ANSWERED What does survival actually look like when you're barely holding it together? Working seven jobs. Budgeting to the ounce of what you eat. Sleeping in your car in parking lots. Bouncing from couch to couch with your dog. No hair done, no nails done, underwear with holes in them. Everything calculated, purposeful, intentional. What was the first piece you put back into place after hitting rock bottom? Money. Financial stability and freedom. Six months to get out of $20,000 in debt—no social life, no dating, bare bones spending, saying yes to every single job. Getting out of debt was the key out. How did grief strip you down and what did it make you face about yourself? It made you realize you weren't living. Everything in your life up until that point needed to go because it wasn't yours. You had to sit in the reality of your grief—the loss of a person, a pet, or the life that doesn't match your expectations. You can't bypass it. What's one "should" you had to kill in yourself before you could actually live your own story? The idea that you should worry...

    37 min

  6. 12/19/2025

    Starting Over After Burnout: When Everything Has to Crumble

    Let’s face it: when a year doesn’t go as planned, it’s usually because something bigger is trying to break through. In this episode of Hot Mess Magic, Michelle shares how 2025 brought everything to a full stop—getting flagged, losing monetization, killing two podcasts, firing a promoter, and grieving the death of an identity she wasn’t ready to let go of. What looked like chaos was actually clarity trying to surface. This isn’t a story about pushing harder or fixing the mess. It’s about what happens when control becomes the problem, when instant gratification keeps you stuck, and when starting over feels like failure—even though it’s the only honest move left. If you’re planning the next chapter without acknowledging what already ended, this episode will hit close to home. You’re not alone. Your people are here. IS THIS EPISODE FOR YOU? Listen if you’re: Burned out from forcing something that no longer fitsGrieving an identity you’ve outgrown but don’t want to admitFocused on money, metrics, or momentum instead of alignmentA high achiever who hates being told to slow downPlanning the future without honoring the last ten years This episode is for people ready to stop pretending the push is working. WHAT GETS EXPOSED How control disguises itself as commitmentWhy identity death often looks like failure firstThe lie of instant gratification and the cost of avoiding the long game BURKE BOMBS 💣 💣 “I was focused on the money. The numbers.” 💣 “I didn’t see the fact that everything needed to crumble.” 💣 “You’re not behind. You’re exactly where you’re meant to be.” QUESTIONS ANSWERED Why does starting over feel like failure? Starting over feels like failure when your identity is wrapped up in what you’ve built. When something has to end, it can feel like you lost ground instead of gained clarity. In reality, it’s often the moment alignment finally catches up. How do you know when control is the problem? When everything requires force to keep moving—when clarity disappears and pressure increases—control has replaced trust. Roadblocks aren’t punishment. They’re invitations to stop, reflect, and change direction. WHAT YOU’LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODE The moment the podcast universe hit pauseWhy monetization and metrics clouded perspectiveKilling two shows and grieving the identity tied to themFiring what was out of integrityLearning to play the long game after ten years of forcing ABOUT MICHELLE BURKE Michelle Burke is the bestselling author of Hot Mess Magic, keynote speaker, and host of the Hot Mess Magic podcast. She doesn’t do curated advice or toxic positivity. She exposes patterns, calls out dysfunction, and gives people permission to stop pretending and trust themselves again. This isn’t self-help. It’s self-trust. 📧 Newsletter: https://michelleaburke.substack.com/ 📱 Instagram: @michelleaburke 🌐 Instagram: @hotmessmagicmedia 📖 Book: Hot Mess Magic – Discover the Magic in Your Mess LISTEN & SUBSCRIBE Apple Podcasts | Spotify | YouTube If this episode cracked something open, subscribe so you don’t miss what comes next. And if it landed, leave a...

    9 min

  7. 12/09/2025

    Entrepreneurship Burnout: She Walked Away from Seven Figures to Save Her Soul

    Let's face it: entrepreneurship burnout doesn't look like exhaustion. It looks like success. Seven figures. Multiple locations. 20+ employees. Awards. Recognition. And a 2am breakdown on your knees, screaming into the dark because your soul can't take it anymore. You already know what this feels like. The shoulds drowning out the wants. The external validation replacing your intuitive clarity. The perfect life that's actually a prison. Here's the thing: entrepreneurship burnout isn't about working too hard. It's about living the wrong life while performing the right one. This episode exposes the pattern nobody talks about—when success becomes suffocation and walking away becomes survival. Michelle Ghassemi built a seven-figure organic salon, ignored every sign of entrepreneurship burnout for two years, and finally chose her soul over the metrics. This is what it actually costs. This is what recovery looks like. This is permission to stop pretending you're fine when you're dying inside. You're not alone. Your people are here. This is your reckoning. Yet. IS THIS EPISODE FOR YOU?Listen if you're: ✓ Running a "successful" business while experiencing entrepreneurship burnout you're pretending doesn't exist ✓ Hitting every external marker of success while dying inside ✓ Ignoring intuitive nudges because "it doesn't make logical sense" to walk away ✓ Drowning in shoulds instead of wants—employees, overhead, expectations ✓ Asking "Who am I doing this for?" and scared of the answer ✓ Ready to stop outsourcing your power to everyone except yourself This is for you if you're done performing success and ready to trust what your body's been screaming at you for years. WHAT GETS EXPOSEDThe "success as prison" pattern that keeps high-achieving entrepreneurs checking boxes while crumbling internally—and why entrepreneurship burnout is your nervous system's last-ditch effort to save you Why ignoring intuitive clarity for years leads to 2am breakdowns where your soul finally cracks open and refuses to let you keep pretending The uncomfortable truth about identity death after walking away from entrepreneurship burnout—and why the 12-month recovery period is where the real transformation happens BURKE BOMBS💣 "I did not ask permission to open my business. I do not have to ask permission to close it." 💣 "Entrepreneurship burnout isn't just tiredness. It's your soul screaming 'I can't do this anymore' while you shove it down and keep performing." 💣 "Success without sustainability is expensive self-betrayal. Your nervous system keeps the receipts." QUESTIONS ANSWEREDWhat are the signs of entrepreneurship burnout that successful business owners ignore? Entrepreneurship burnout starts with intuitive nudges you dismiss because "everything looks fine on paper." You accumulate more shoulds than wants. You feel resentful toward the business you built. You're living for everyone else—employees, clients, reputation—while your soul dies. The external wake-up calls start: things breaking down, people leaving, your body rebelling. Entrepreneurship burnout doesn't look like exhaustion at first. It looks like a perfect life you're suffocating in. How do you recover from entrepreneurship burnout after leaving your business? Recovery from entrepreneurship burnout requires identity death. You spent years being the business owner, the employer, the one with answers. Walking away means sitting in the unknown. Michelle took 12 months to deliberately do nothing—to distill 19 years of who she was and figure out what she wanted to bring forward. Entrepreneurship burnout recovery isn't about bouncing back. It's about becoming someone new. It's slow, it's painful,...

    42 min

  8. 12/05/2025

    Stop Waiting for Permission

    Stop Waiting for PermissionEpisode Summary: Let's face it: you already know what you need to do. You listened to last week's episode about disappointing people. You nodded along. Maybe you even shared it. And then your mom called, your coworker asked, your partner assumed. And you said yes when you really wanted to say no. You already know your body's been screaming NO for weeks. Here's the thing: you don't need better boundaries. You need to stop waiting for permission to use them. You're still asking "Am I allowed? Is it okay? Will people think I'm selfish?" And no one's coming to give you that permission. Not your therapist, not your best friend, not even your nervous system breaking down. This episode exposes the pattern of knowing what you need to do but performing like you're going to change while wondering why January looks exactly like last January. You're not alone. Your people are here. This is your reckoning. Yet. IS THIS EPISODE FOR YOU?Listen if you're: ✓ Still saying yes when your body is screaming no ✓ Waiting for someone to tell you it's okay to choose yourself ✓ Performing like you're going to set boundaries while doing the exact same thing ✓ Asking permission to use the boundaries you already know you need ✓ Wondering why nothing changes year after year ✓ Ready to stop waiting and start actually doing This is for you if you're done asking for permission and ready to just take it. WHAT GETS EXPOSEDThe "waiting for permission" pattern keeping you stuck—you don't need better boundaries, you need to stop asking if you're allowed to use them Why your nervous system breaking down still isn't enough—you keep overriding what your body knows because you're still seeking external validation The uncomfortable truth about change—if the answer is "nothing," own it and stop performing like you're different BURKE BOMBS💣 "No one's coming to give you permission. Not your therapist, not your best friend, not me. Not even your nervous system breaking down is enough for you to give yourself permission." 💣 "You don't need better boundaries. You need to stop waiting for permission to use them." 💣 "Stop performing like you're going to change and then wondering why January looks exactly like last January." QUESTIONS ANSWEREDWhy do I keep saying yes when I want to say no? You're waiting for permission. Your body knows what it wants—it's been screaming NO for weeks, months, maybe years. But you keep overriding it because some part of you is still asking "Am I allowed to do this? Is it okay?" You don't need better boundaries. You need to stop outsourcing the decision to use them. No one's coming to give you permission. You have to decide right now that you're done asking. How do I actually start setting boundaries? Stop asking what you SHOULD do and ask what you're ACTUALLY going to do. Not what sounds good while listening to a podcast. What are you going to do differently this week? If the answer is nothing, own it. Stop performing like you're going to change. The shift happens when you stop waiting for external permission and decide you're done asking. WHAT YOU'LL HEAR IN THIS EPISODEThe week-after check-in - It's been a week since the Thanksgiving episode and Michelle's guessing most of you already messed it up The pattern exposed - You listened, you nodded, you shared it. Then your mom called. Your coworker asked. Your partner assumed. And you said yes. Again. The real problem - You don't need better boundaries. You need to stop waiting for permission to use them. Your body's been screaming NO but you keep asking "Am I...

    3 min
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About

The podcast for people tired of being told to heal, optimize, and “do the work” when the real work is admitting what you already know but refuse to act on. Hosted by Michelle Burke, keynote speaker and author who doesn’t inspire people to feel better. She exposes what high-performers hide behind: self-awareness replacing action, resilience enabling tolerance, and growth as another way to avoid deciding. If you’ve ever thought, “I know exactly what I need to do, so why am I not doing it?” this is the conversation. No performative breakthroughs. No encouragement. Just the truth about why smart, capable people stay stuck and what finally forces a decision. New episodes weekly. Connect on IG @michelleaburke 5 Star rating on Apple Podcasts

Information

  • Creator
    Michelle Burke
  • Years Active
    2025 - 2026
  • Episodes
    37
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2026 Michelle Burke
  • Show Website
    Hot Mess Magic