How To Relate

Brittani Procknow
  • 5.0 (9)
  • Relationships
  • Updated Weekly

Many people try to answer what makes relationships work. This podcast aims to answer how do we work relationships? I’m Brittani Procknow, a relationship therapist working with individuals and couples to deepen intimacy and live relationally. I’m taking insights from behind closed doors to you, a listener seeking to improve your relational wellbeing. I’m talking to people about everyday concepts including mental health, work, dating, families, friendships, and hobbies to give insights and actions towards living relationally. I’m grateful to have you here. Let’s dive in.

  1. 6d ago

    Rescuing Everyone Else First: Trauma in the Fire Service and First Responders with Blaise Harris LCMHC

    Blaise Harris, LCMHC, is a therapist, former firefighter, and founder of G Squared Consulting & Counseling Services — known online as The Dope Black Therapist. His practice focuses on trauma work with Black men and first responders, drawing on his own experience surviving a divorce, major depressive disorder, and suicide attempts before finding his way into the field. In this episode, Brittani and Blaise cover: How Blaise's own mental health crisis (post-divorce depression, suicidal ideation, psychiatric hospitalization) led him to therapy — and to specializing in first responders and Black men Why first responders have protocols for every physical emergency but none for their mental health PTSD stats among first responders and why the real numbers are likely far higher than reported The stigma differences across police, fire, EMS, and dispatch Navigating racism and mistrust as a Black first responder, including a story of being called a slur on the job How to talk to a partner about a hard shift without needing to "fix" it — communicating needs instead of details Naming and setting an internal boundary with anxiety/depression ("acknowledge it, then tell it to shut up") His advice for first responders on choosing a therapist — "try them on like shoes" Find Blaise on Instagram ⁠@the_dopeblacktherapist⁠ or at ⁠thedopeblacktherapist.com⁠. Brittani's Resources Website: ⁠https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/⁠ IG: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow⁠ Intimacy Workbook: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219⁠ Newsletter: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc⁠ ☕ Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. ⁠https://larryscoffee.com/relate⁠ Therapist Threads: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/069297fffb⁠

  2. Jul 10

    AMA: The Erotic Equation, Attraction, Obstacles & Dating Apps Have in Common, Red Flags, and Death of Curiosity in Dating

    Matthew Case turns the mic on Brittani for a rapid-fire AMA episode, unpacking what's missing from the current dating and relationship advice landscape — and why attachment styles and red-flag culture might be doing more harm than good. The attachment style hyperfixation: Why reducing every dating dynamic to "anxious vs. avoidant" strips away nuance — and Jack Morin's "erotic equation" (attraction + obstacle = desire) as a better lens for understanding chemistry "We attract what we lack": How the same qualities that draw us to a partner can become the exact source of friction later on The dating coach blind spot: Why telling people who they should be attracted to rarely works — and what to do instead when you keep dating the same "type" Red flag fatigue: What we lose by hyperfocusing on red flags instead of green flags, and the "your red flag is my pink flag" problem Overcorrecting after a breakup: Why swinging to the opposite "type" often backfires — and how to tell if you're in a real relationship or just a reactive experiment The case against dating apps: Why they've shifted from "meeting people" to "curating a resume," and a reframe for using them without losing your mind Curiosity as a skill: Borrowing from motivational interviewing to ask better first-date questions — including a simple reframe of "do you want kids?" into an open-ended, story-driven conversation Millennial dating pressure: Why knowing what you don't want (thanks, parents' divorce rates) hasn't translated into knowing what you do want Acknowledgement: The sound is a bit off, and we appreciate your patience and understanding as technological issues occur.  Brittani's Resources Website: https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/ IG: https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow Intimacy Workbook: https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219 Newsletter: https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc ☕ Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. https://larryscoffee.com/relate

  3. Jul 2

    Shame and Healing in Sex Addiction with Austin Hatch

    Austin Hatch is a certified sex addiction therapist and founder of Phase Your Recovery. In this episode, he and Brittani talk about the difference between honesty and transparency, how shame gets weaponized in relationships, and why community — not just insight — is often the missing piece in real change.   Topics Covered: Why most clients arrive in the middle of a self-made crisis The "hidden language of addiction": minimization, rationalization, justification Honesty as an offering vs. transparency as a bid for control "Sad puppy energy" and how shame gets weaponized in relationships Why Austin pushes back on the addiction label as an identity Requiring partners into the work within the first three sessions Reframing needs vs. desires around sex and intimacy Building Unmasking Shame, a 12-month experiential couples group Male vulnerability, culture, and what genuine emotional honesty looks like Connect with Austin: https://phasezerorecovery.com/about-us YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCZnrCJ-7WtX9NTIOu8d2gNA Brittani's Resources Website: ⁠https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/⁠ IG: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow⁠ Intimacy Workbook: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219⁠ Newsletter: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc⁠ Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. ⁠https://larryscoffee.com/relate⁠ Therapist Threads: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/069297fffb⁠

  4. Jun 25

    The Past and Future of Sex with Dr. Marianne Brandon

    Sex therapist and psychologist Dr. Marianne Brandon is here to energize the conversation about sex. Marianne shares what she discovered after years of working with highly educated, sexually confident women who still struggled with low libido — and why the standard interventions weren't working. The conversation gets into evolutionary biology, the "10 seeds" framework for understanding desire differences, what it actually takes for women to let go in the bedroom, and what AI and VR porn mean for the future of human intimacy. In this episode: How Marianne fell into sex therapy — and kept it a secret for years Why giving women "permission" isn't enough to solve low libido The seed analogy: understanding desire differences through an evolutionary lens Why caretaking kills desire (and what to do about it) Practical exercises for women learning to open their bodies and men reclaiming their power VR porn, oxytocin, and why therapists need to be paying attention Romantasy, AI intimacy, and the growing turn away from real humans Guest Resources: Podcast: ⁠The Sex Doctors⁠ Website: ⁠drbrandon.net⁠ Psychology Today blog: The Future of Intimacy Brittani's Resources Website: ⁠https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/⁠ IG: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow⁠ Intimacy Workbook: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219⁠ Newsletter: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc⁠   ☕ Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. ⁠https://larryscoffee.com/relate⁠   Therapist Threads: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/069297fffb⁠

  5. Jun 18

    Why Connection Beats Algorithms: A genuine conversation with startup founder Devyn Lowry

    Devyn Lowry joins Brittani to talk about life as a startup founder, why empathy is a non-negotiable skill in tech, and the broken systems that led him to build Ocean Labs — a mental health platform designed to actually match people with the right therapist. Topics Covered: What it's really like working in startups (spoiler: a lot of hats) Why empathy belongs on every team, not just in design The research-backed reason therapeutic fit drives outcomes How current therapist matching platforms are just glorified database filters The ethics of VC funding in mental health tech AI, human connection, and why we need to get back to building things that matter Connect with Devyn: LinkedIn: Devyn Lowry Website: https://www.tryocean.io/ Email: ⁠devyn@tryocean.io⁠ Resources Mentioned: Ocean Labs beta launch: June 25th Therapists: reach out directly to join the network Prospective clients: early intake sign-ups opening soon Website: ⁠https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/⁠ IG: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow⁠ Intimacy Workbook: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219⁠ Newsletter: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc⁠   Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. ⁠https://larryscoffee.com/relate⁠    Stay connected. Go touch grass.

  6. Jun 8

    What Are You Actually Living For? Purpose, Passion, and the Three Currencies with Drew Klobuchar

    What is purpose, and how do you find it when life feels uncertain, overwhelming, or directionless? In this episode, Brittani and Drew explore the relationship between purpose, passion, responsibility, freedom, and meaning. They unpack why purpose isn't always about feeling inspired or excited—it often emerges through commitment, curiosity, relationships, and even irritation. From childhood report cards and career choices to Viktor Frankl, daydreaming, self-limiting beliefs, and the role of relationships in creating meaning, this conversation offers a thoughtful look at what helps us build a life that feels purposeful.   In This Episode We Discuss: The difference between passion and purpose Why passion isn't always enjoyable—and often involves suffering How responsibility can create meaning and strengthen identity The connection between purpose and relationships Self-limiting beliefs that keep us from pursuing what matters Why freedom alone doesn't necessarily lead to fulfillment How imagination and daydreaming can reveal what you truly want Viktor Frankl's perspective on meaning, choice, and attitude The role of irritation, curiosity, and fascination in creating change Why relational care is a form of self-care Brittani's Resources Website: https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/ IG: https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow Intimacy Workbook: https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219 Newsletter: https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc   Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. https://larryscoffee.com/relate   Therapist Threads: https://howtorelate.kit.com/069297fffb

  7. May 29

    Breaking the Broke Mindset with Taylor Gilbert

    Taylor is a LCSW and founder of Social Work to Wealth- a finance education platform for social workers. Taylor shares how a tip about high-yield savings accounts sent her down a personal finance rabbit hole that reshaped her finances, her marriage, and her mission. She and her husband tackled $277,000 in debt — and she's been sharing that journey publicly ever since to normalize the money conversation for social workers everywhere. In this episode: Why the "you're not in it for the money" messaging is harmful — and wrong What the NASW Code of Ethics actually says about financial wellness (Taylor asked the guy who wrote it) The "digital envelope" budgeting method Taylor has used for four years Practical salary negotiation tips, including why you need a script in your Notes app Nontraditional career paths: trust and safety at Spotify, HR at IPSY, and beyond The three currencies — money, time, and energy — and where yours is going Resources mentioned: Finance for the People — Paco de León https://www.amazon.com/Finance-People-Getting-Grip-Finances/dp/0143136259 I Will Teach You to Be Rich — Ramit Sethi https://www.amazon.com/Will-Teach-You-Be-Rich/dp/0761147489 Yo Quiero Dinero podcast — Jannese Torres https://yoquierodineropodcast.com/ Delyanne the Money Coach https://delyannethemoneycoach.com/ Tori Dunlap / Her First $100K https://herfirst100k.com/ Find Taylor: ⁠socialworktowealth.com⁠ IG: https://www.instagram.com/socialworktowealth/   How to Relate Website: ⁠https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/⁠ IG: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow⁠ Intimacy Workbook: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219⁠ Newsletter: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc⁠   Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. ⁠https://larryscoffee.com/relate⁠

  8. May 21

    Why Becoming a Parent Changes Everything with Veronica Kemeny

    We plan births. We register for gear. We don't plan for what happens to the people becoming parents. Veronica Kemeny, co-founder of Anchor Perinatal Wellness in Raleigh, joins Brittani to talk about matrescence, the neuroscience of new parenthood, why couples hit their hardest stretch right when baby arrives — and what support actually looks like across a full continuum of care. Veronica Kemeny, LCSW discusses the realities of pregnancy, postpartum mental health, parenting, relationships, and nervous system regulation.   Resources Anchor Perinatal Wellness — free walk-in screenings, outpatient + IOP, call even if you're out of state https://www.anchorperinatal.com/ Postpartum Support International — ⁠postpartum.net⁠ · 55+ free virtual support groups, 24/7 Maternal Mental Health Hotline, state chapters for local navigation   Brittani's Resources Website: ⁠https://www.brittaniprocknow.com/⁠ IG: ⁠https://www.instagram.com/brittani_procknow⁠ Intimacy Workbook: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/b956780219⁠ Newsletter: ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/e9f87bb2dc⁠   Support the show and drink coffee! Proud to have Larry's Coffee as a show sponsor. Keep caffeinated with quality coffee. ⁠https://larryscoffee.com/relate⁠    Therapist Threads Newsletter: For therapists to stay connected ⁠https://howtorelate.kit.com/069297fffb⁠

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Ratings & Reviews

5
out of 5
9 Ratings

About

Many people try to answer what makes relationships work. This podcast aims to answer how do we work relationships? I’m Brittani Procknow, a relationship therapist working with individuals and couples to deepen intimacy and live relationally. I’m taking insights from behind closed doors to you, a listener seeking to improve your relational wellbeing. I’m talking to people about everyday concepts including mental health, work, dating, families, friendships, and hobbies to give insights and actions towards living relationally. I’m grateful to have you here. Let’s dive in.

Information

  • Creator
    Brittani Procknow
  • Years Active
    2024 - 2026
  • Episodes
    76
  • Rating
    Explicit
  • Copyright
    © Copyright 2024 All rights reserved.
  • Show Website
    How To Relate